#rhys10

[councillor-roland]

Roland was aware, vaguely, of Rhys tightening and then relaxing his grip on his shirt but he was too caught up in the mess of his explanation about Aneirin to address it or think too much of it. He would've hardly minded the idea of Rhys wanting to cling to him, though, in fact he welcomed that especially right now after the separation they'd just had. Rhys pointed out, probably rightfully, that not talking about these things anymore tonight wasn't dealing with them but Roland didn't want to deal with them right now. It hurt too much and, as he'd said, he was thoroughly tired of pain. He let out a huff of a breath. "I know, I know, but I can't..." Roland shook his head. "I just can't, not right now. I will deal with it I just need a little time." He was pleading altogether more than he would've liked but he couldn't seem to stop himself, needing Rhys to understand just how badly he needed things to go back to normal, especially between them. He stiffened just a little at whatever Rhys had almost called Aneirin but focused on the feel of his hand on his chest instead to try and stay calm about it. "You don't know him." Roland still protested, he couldn't seem to help it, his tone dark and a little bitter. "My blood or not, grand declarations from him do seem to hold clearly." Hadn't he just said he didn't want to talk about this? Why were they still doing it?

Rhys finally agreed to give it up, though, and Roland was relieved though not particularly satisfied with the suggestion the witch did make. He was clearly not fully at peace either, Roland could practically sense it, and more than cleaning or anything else Roland figured they just needed to be together, to forget about all this for a while and just reunite and enjoy each other again, soothe each other like they hadn't been able to for weeks. "Let's skip the cleaning and just go to bed. I've finished the bedroom anyway and we can easily deal with the rest tomorrow. It's been too long since I've gotten to hold you, mon amour." As if to emphasize that, Roland leaned in and kissed him again for a long moment, trying to drive away all the other worries for both of them with the action. After a long moment, he finally pulled back and leaned their foreheads together. "Come to bed." It was soft, inviting, still a little pleading. When Rhys agreed Roland smiled a little, relieved. "Thank you." He kissed him again, briefly, then lead him to the bedroom. They settled in together soon enough and Roland finally felt like things had shifted back to being right. Not everything, of course, but he could face those things much more readily with Rhys back at his side and in his arms again.

END

Roland’s waspish responses to be expected in a time of heightened emotional vulnerability and though the urge to respond to every jagged remark with an equally embittered response out of an instinctual passive aggressive need that Rhys could only thank his mother for inheriting and passing down the family tree, the witch kept his jaw clamped shut as he listened, going as far as consciously keeping his expression compassionate so as not to stumble any further into already rocky conversational territory. As Roland’s hand settled into place over his, Rhys felt himself relax by the slightest amount; a reciprocation of the gesture was always a good sign.

Listening closely as Roland divulged the messy details of a more strained siring bond, Rhys tried to empathise and sympathise with the plight presented as best he could. Of course, he couldn’t claim to understand the intensity and complexity of the relationship between a sire and their fledgling, nor could he claim to be thrilled about some hanger-on apparently now wanting to cling to Ro after having more decades on this earth than Rhys had been alive spent having, apparently, minimal contact. Rhys’ hold over Roland’s heart had tightened without him even realising and he loosened his grip on Roland’s shirt with a faint noise of embarrassed realisation at such a clear display of his emotions getting the better of him – the only godsend (and potentially the only time Rhys would consider it as such) was that Roland had been so entrenched in his recollection that he’d failed to notice a second of it. Or, at least, Rhys could hope such observations proved correct. Sharing wasn’t a concept the witch had ever been fond of; whether that was a byproduct of being an only child or the fact that for the first time in a long time, Rhys had found someone he was genuinely scared of losing, of becoming dull to– he was getting ahead of himself. Stay in the present, Dasior. 

The purposefully vague ‘other reasons’ were concerning by themselves and the nagging pull of Rhys’ clairvoyance was growing stronger by the second – he couldn’t pretend the news wasn’t concerning in its own right and the need to see the problem for himself so that he could begin to figure out a workable strategy for all involved felt almost overwhelming. Taking another breath to steady himself, Rhys let himself be pulled closer as Roland’s account came to an end, the defeated words and pleading stare that followed fully exposing just how much the entire ordeal had worn Roland down over time. “You know just as well as I do that sweeping things under the rug for the time being isn’t dealing with them, Ro,” stroking a soothing circle against Roland’s heart, Rhys’ expression softened as he considered his words carefully. “And as much as I’d love to suggest you hold the tw– Aneirin to his word and see how long he crumbles considering you both have eternity at your disposal, it’s probably not going to last as long as you think it will – grand declarations in heated moments usually don’t carry the weight they seem to. Also, he’s your fledgling. Histrionics run in the bloodline.” 

With a tense sigh, Rhys averted his gaze to focus his attention on the wall behind, pleased to be met with a vast expanse of nothing as opposed to the emotional agony still present in Roland’s eyes. As unfortunate as the Aneirin and Gwyn-related incidents had been, Rhys was struggling to tap into the full depths of his empathy – whether it could be blamed on the stressors of balancing two exceedingly demanding jobs, the lack of consistent sleep, the come down that refused to shift (and that he stubbornly refused to heal through any magical means) or whatever, Rhys couldn’t be sure, but what he did know was that it wasn’t making a discussion of this nature particularly easy to have. Returning his gaze to meet Roland’s, the witch gave him a small, reassuring smile and mentally willed his tone to sound as upbeat as he needed it to. “Probably for the best if we call it a night on the topic, though. Instead, why don’t you continue tidying the bedroom, maybe neaten up a few things around the kitchen, empty a bin or two? I’ll be done in here by then – then we can turn in for the night. Tomorrow’s a new day; we’ll deal with the finer details then. That work for you?”

[councillor-roland]

Reassurance always seemed to work wonders on Roland. No matter how wounded, angry, or defensive when Rhys reassured him of how strong their bond was or that he'd lashed out unnecessarily, it almost always seemed to soothe Roland. Such was the case as Rhys promised that it hadn't changed anything between them and Roland finally felt like he could truly let it go. What a relief it was, too. It was unlike him to hold on to such a sickening feeling of guilt. The regret and self-loathing was practically foreign to him and he was only too eager to toss it away and go back to normal. He wondered, again, how Rhys somehow operated with that feeling on a daily basis. It was stifling. "I'm glad. Consider it forgotten, then. I'm happy to let it go." It did make him feel lighter, knowing and believing that it hadn't poisoned anything between them. It was a mistake and it wouldn't happen again.

If only the good feelings could've remained for the rest of the evening but that apparently wasn't to be. The Aneirin problem was distressing in a different way than his recent transgression with Gwyn. Roland recognized it was his fault, that he'd made a mess of things, and he desperately wanted to fix it but could still see no way around or through it. Aneirin demanded things he couldn't give, wanted him to bend the few boundaries he had around his relationship, and Roland didn't want to do that. More and more, however, he was wondering how much it would really harm him to just...let Aneirin adore him the way he seemed to want to even if Roland couldn't return it the same way. Rhys' callousness certainly hadn't helped, though the witch seemed to realise that almost as soon as Roland reacted to it given how quickly that apology came. "It was most certainly uncalled for." The vampire confirmed, rather more sharply than he'd spoken before, though it was very much in his nature to lash out when he was hurt and Rhys should've been familiar with it at this point. Rhys tried to comfort him suddenly and Roland was torn between letting him and pulling away more. Being called 'uppity' certainly didn't incline him towards the former.

"How fresh can it be when it happened weeks ago? This was before you left, just before, in fact." That certainly hadn't helped matters, that he'd argued with Aneirin, been seemingly cut off, and then had Rhys abandon him practically the next second. "Your name calling isn't helpful either." Roland's tone was peevish but he sighed when Rhys touched his shoulder, melted even further when the witch's hand pressed against his heart. It was second nature to put his own over it to hold and keep it there. "It wasn't, not in the least. Our contact has always been sporadic and I hoped that with us now in the same place it would be better. I've missed him. But....it became an argument, partly to do with you partly for...other reasons." Their history that had no closure. Perhaps he should've told Rhys that Aneirin still loved him but he feared how Rhys would react to that and he truly didn't want more strife between them, not when Rhys had just gotten back. Roland closed his eyes and leaned into the hand on his jaw even as he shook his head minutely at the advice. "He'll take too much time. I need to fix it somehow but I can't see a way through. He's already said he wants nothing more to do with me and whether that's really true or not he's stubborn enough to keep to it." He opened his eyes but kept his gaze downcast, though he did drift closer and wind his arm around Rhys again, the other still holding Rhys' hand to his chest.

Letting out a slow breath, he looked up and met Rhys' eyes again, something like a plea in them. "I don't want to discuss it anymore. I'm so very tired of pain, cheri, it's been constant for weeks. I just want to be happy that you're back, to enjoy our reunion. Can't we do that instead and leave all this for the time being?" There'd already been too many painful interruptions to what should've been their joyous reunion and Roland was sick of them. His heart had ached enough these past three weeks, he wanted it to be light again.

It took considerable self-restraint but Rhys let Roland’s question dissolve in the space between them unanswered, focusing the majority of his attention on the task at hand – focusing too heavily on the particulars on a slip-up didn’t seem like a productive way to finally spend some quality time together. The scoff had indicated that whatever response Rhys could have provided, it wouldn’t have gone down well and given that he hadn’t even been back an entire twenty-four hours yet, he was hoping to avoid any kind of argument. Fortunately, the decision to respond with educated silence and, after a pause, affection and a little earnest reassurance seemed to pay off.

Surprisingly, Roland remained quiet as instructed whilst Rhys said what he needed to and the confirmation that followed put the witch’s mind at ease by the slightest degree. Roland had been entirely honest even if he had had to be prompted – Rhys couldn’t fault him for that. The circumstances had been out of the ordinary; how could he really have expected things to have continued in good faith in his absence when he’d left matters between them in such an atrocious state? “Let it pass,” he reaffirmed with a nod, “I promise you it hasn’t changed a thing between us.” Rhys’ entire demeanour softened as Roland’s touch only just registered, the concern in his gaze melting into adoration as the vampire continued. The sincerity was almost breathtakingly notable and it made Rhys’ heart ache in a way he hadn’t known possible before. In an instant, it seemed ludicrous to be wasting breath on such a preposterous notion; there was no one for him but Roland. He’d never felt so strongly about another before and had certainly never felt so sure of such a fact. He’d lost himself to his thoughts as he’d gazed reverently at Roland, only remembering to snap himself out of it as the conversation shifted into less adoring territory.

The realisation that he’d fucked up sharpened with a firmer certainty as Roland’s touch dropped abruptly. The wounded words that followed made the witch wince and he inhaled slowly as he sifted through his mind for the best way to format an apology for handling the news in quite possibly the worst way possible. “I’m sorry, Ro. I didn’t mean to– that was uncalled for. I’m sorry.” He probably could’ve done better than that but he’d rushed for any kind of response the moment he’d felt Roland begin to pull away, the loss of his immediate present jarringly noticeable. “You don’t know that,” Rhys countered quietly once Roland had finished, his gaze fixed to the floor as he mulled over everything. “Things are still fresh, too raw to be used as any conclusive or definite framework. Respectfully, from what I’ve noticed, you’re both uppity types with bigger feelings than bodies.” Glancing back up at Roland again, Rhys considered the options available for a moment, his gaze flickering over him to assess the councilman in his vulnerable entirety before moving to eliminate the space between them by tentatively reaching out to lightly rest a hand on Roland’s shoulder, offering a gentle squeeze of moral support as the other moved to rest against his heart. 

“I’m sorry. That couldn’t have been an easy experience for either of you. There’s a lot of history between you and a bond beyond the comprehension of most, so I understand the intensity of the situation. I apologise for handling it the way I did initially.” The hand that had been resting on Roland’s shoulder moved to gently cup his jaw, making sure to hold his gaze so that at least some of his words went through. “Just give him time, Ro. All you can do right now is give him the time and space he needs to work through whatever it is he needs to work through.”

[councillor-roland]

In spite of how his voice rose and all the emotions that were coming to the surface, Roland watched Rhys carefully for even the smallest reaction. His expression remained at first mostly unreadable though the vampire noted the clenching and unclenching of Rhys' hands, the stiff nod. The words that followed, though seemingly a dismissal of the whole situation, were not particularly comforting. Roland scoffed. "Is that what you'll say now only to bring it up again the next time we argue?" Roland wouldn't put it past Rhys to needle him like that, knowing him well enough to know it was a distinct possibility at this point. He glanced at the damnable sofa that Rhys rendered pristine in a moment, expression twisting bitterly. Clearly he should've gotten rid of it before now and he might end up doing so anyway given he doubted it would be able to bring him any pleasure now even without the stains.

Rhys turned back towards him and Roland met his gaze, noted the melancholy there, and felt a sort of desperation rising up in him. Would this always be between them now, regardless of what Rhys had said? Would it fester and poison them, and Rhys' beautiful smiles always be tinged with that hint of melancholy when he looked at him? Roland wouldn't be able to stand it, if so, he would have to do something, anything to-and then Rhys' arms were around him. The spiral of worry vanished as soon as it had come up and the desperation melted away as Roland hugged him back just as tightly, pressing his cheek against the witch's hair and closing his eyes for a moment. Amazing how such a simple gesture could soothe him almost immediately yet that's what the hug accomplished. The words might have been muffled but Roland still heard them and he opened his eyes, nodding slightly. "All right." It was soft, all previous rancor having disappeared from his tone. The kiss almost made him smile a little, his lips twitching slightly, before he met Rhys' gaze and focused on him to really listen. There was an earnestness in Rhys' eyes and paired with his gentle tone, Roland could tell he was being sincere and he almost regretted his earlier snap about thinking Rhys might bring it up again to dig at him. The irony wasn't lost on him, however, that Rhys of all people was telling him to let go of the guilt though undoubtedly Roland would find that much easier to do than Rhys.

He waited dutifully until Rhys finished speaking about it and nodded. "It certainly won't do me any favours." Roland agreed, though there was a little more weight to those words as if he wasn't just talking about himself. "But I can let it go if it truly hasn't ruined anything between us. Your forgiveness is the balm that will soothe it all away." Roland did smile a little then, even if he'd never actually apologized or asked for forgiveness it seemed to be what Rhys was granting and he would eagerly take it. He lifted a hand to to stroke Rhys' cheek lightly. "I never want to hurt you like that, unintentionally or otherwise." Roland's voice was tender and sincere. The thought of hurting Rhys was always sickening, it was no wonder he could hardly stand himself for thinking he'd actually done it.

It almost seemed as though they'd moved past all the unpleasantness...until Rhys' clear amusement at the mention of Aneirin and how Roland had handled that situation. It was almost shocking, the lack of sympathy, and Roland felt it like a slap his hand dropping away suddenly from Rhys' face as he frowned. "You find it funny that I've hurt someone I care deeply about? I can assure you it isn't. Of course I did it for you, I would do anything for you, but that doesn't mean it wasn't painful for me." Roland still had a tangle of unresolved emotions about Aneirin and the situation they found themselves in. He hadn't been able to do much about it since Rhys' leaving but Roland wanted to resolve it, somehow, wanted it to be okay even if that seemed impossible. He shook his head and pulled away from Rhys. "I made a true mess of things with him in a way we may never be able to come back from and yet you nearly laugh at the thought. What cruelty." Perhaps Roland was oversensitive given what his last few weeks had been like and Rhys the overarching cause but it still seemed callous and he shot the witch an injured look.

Though his mind was desperate to interrupt, Rhys bit his tongue and let Roland voice his reasonings. Truth be told, he wasn’t entirely sure how he should feel about any of it. He knew that if he were to breathe a word of what he’d seen to Seth or Mateo that both proud members of the anti-Roland workplace fanclub would be beside themselves with yet another reason to dangle Rhys’ questionable taste in men over his head whilst trying to shake some sense into him – no, for now, this remained between the two of them. Well, three if Gwyn was counted which, clearly, he had been. As Roland stepped closer and continued his plea deal, Rhys kept his thoughts firmly to himself, his hands clenching and unclenching into fists to keep himself grounded as his mind replayed the visions on a loop. The awareness of his hypocrisy remained and try as he might, Rhys couldn’t bring himself to be angry at Roland’s rule breaking, not when he was guilty of a similar enough crime of his own. 

The witch remained silent and borderline unreadable as Roland’s volume rose. The emotional suffering in the vampire’s tone was painfully obvious and even at his cruellest, Rhys couldn’t pretend it didn’t resonate with the part of him that always made exceptions for Roland. The questions kept coming and though there was so much he wanted to say, trying to find the words still felt like too gargantuan a task, so Rhys settled for a noncommittal, stiff nod, his gaze dropping to survey the floor as he tentatively trusted his voice. “It’s whatever, Ro. It’s done now. No use moping about it.” Rolling his shoulders back with a weighted sigh, Rhys ran a hand over his hair and dragged his gaze back to the sofa, lifting a hand to finish what he’d started as his restoration magic restored the couch to its former glory in the blink of an eye. He assessed his work for a moment before turning his attention back to Roland and the smile that settled into place as their eyes met again was one tinged with a melancholy. 

There was little space between them left to close but regardless, Rhys needed the comfort and reassurance that only Roland’s presence could provide these days and so not even a flicker of hesitation featured when Rhys finally moved to pull Roland into a tight hug, burying his face against the vampire’s neck for a moment as he tried to will his thoughts into some form of coherency. “Don’t interrupt for a minute,” he mumbled against Roland’s neck, the words slightly muffled, “let me say what I need to say and then you can talk, ‘kay?” He pressed a kiss to Roland’s jaw before straightening up to look him in the eye, the arms wrapped tight around the councilman’s waist squeezing him a little tighter just for a moment as if to show that no real hard feelings remained. “It was a lapse in judgement, I get it. Things were bad, you weren’t thinking straight, I wasn’t here– I get it. Please put it down now, don’t carry that guilt and regret around with you. It’s not gonna do you any favours, is it?” Rhys’ tone was nothing but gentle as he spoke, as if he were addressing the much, much younger members of the coven back home. He was uncomfortably aware of his hypocrisy in asking Roland not to shoulder the burden of guilt but he was hopeful that just this once, Roland would look past the glaring double standard. “You haven’t ruined anything between us. Everything’s okay, it’s all fine.” 

Despite it all, Rhys couldn’t keep his smile from blossoming into one of genuine amusement at the news of things with Aneirin souring and he ducked his head to hide it from Roland’s line of sight the moment he realised just how visible his reaction had been. “That’s a shame,” Rhys managed, sounding anything but sympathetic with the laugh he was holding back remaining painfully obvious in his tone. He glanced back up once he’d regained his composure. “I’m honoured, though. All that for little ol’ me?”

[councillor-roland]

The look on Rhys' face told Roland everything. He knew, obviously, just what had occurred with Gwyn on the couch. Psychometry and clairvoyance, no doubt. Roland was familiar enough with Rhys' magic at this point to know much of what he could do and he inwardly cursed himself for a fool. Of course Rhys would've discovered what happened, his magic wouldn't let him stay in the dark. The vampire hadn't yet decided if he was going to come clean, caught up as he'd been in the joy and relief of Rhys' return, but now the decision had been made for him. Never mind that Rhys' features softened a little, his tone spoke much louder and the disapproval was clear. "I hardly think that's necessary." Roland's tone was neutral, rather carefully so. He doubted either of them would enjoy going over the intimate details. This feeling was wretched. How did anyone go through life constantly regretting the things they did? "I shouldn't have done it." He didn't mean the sex, though maybe that wasn't clear. Even when they were perfectly happy, Roland always slept with other people and Rhys was aware of that. No, it was his own rule breaking that he was concerned with. "I broke my own rule but I..." Roland clenched his jaw, eyes narrowing slightly. "...well, you've clearly seen the state I was in. It was mere days after you'd left. I was...not doing well and intent on chasing the first thing that seemed like it might be able to drown out the despair." Even to his own ears they sounded like excuses but Rhys was the one who'd left him, who'd driven him to such a state in the first place. Roland's expression hardened and he moved closer.

"Did you see only my transgression? Or did you also witness the horror I felt almost immediately afterwards? The twisting, churning guilt that returns now as strong as it was then? How sick it makes me to think that I've betrayed you and in any way tarnished what we have?" His voice rose as he tried for indignant anger but the guilt he spoke of also upset him and no doubt that came through in his voice. "In my right mind I would have never bitten him. In fact, barely a week before that I made a mess of everything with Aneirin by maintaining that boundary for love of you. Will you hold one moment of weakness against me?" Roland's tone had become accusatory, though he'd certainly spoken much more than Rhys had. Yes, Roland had done it but Rhys had left. It never would have happened if not for that. Never mind that Roland had already forgiven him for that, just moments ago, in fact, which was perhaps why he didn't bring it up directly but it remained there, loudly unspoken.

He’d watched after Roland for a moment longer after he’d made himself scarce. The lack of his presence already made something deep in the witch’s chest ache with a fondness and longing that possessed an intensity Rhys still found himself surprised by no matter how many times he'd experienced it by now. Wandering further into the carnage of the main body of the suite, Rhys didn’t dwell on surveying the neglect for any longer than he had to – what mattered was getting the place back to its usual standard. He cleared his mind of all thought and let himself move on autopilot, the usual golden hue of his magic – brighter now thanks in part to Bastjan’s exhausting admirable training routines back in Mayfair – softly radiating from him as he started anew, cleansing and restoring every surface in sight to its former glory. It was a skill that came as easy as breathing to Rhys at this point and such a fact was precisely why he felt the stubborn jolt of a lingering, seemingly significant event. Blood always told truthful accounts of its release and whether Rhys wished to be privy of the finer details or not, his psychometry and clairvoyance united to blindside him in one fell swoop. The recollection of Roland’s time with Gwyn replayed in the witch’s mind in perfect clarity and it halted him in his tracks as he paused to take it all in. 

He’d been so engrossed in his observations that he’d failed to notice Roland’s return and approach. The sound of the vampire’s voice only faintly registered in Rhys’ mind as the traces of memory began to fade into embittered realisation and he turned to face Roland with a look of wounded disapproval. A quiet voice in the back of his mind sharply reminded him that he’d hardly been abstinent following his return to Mayfair and his expression softened by the slightest degree as he inhaled slowly, trying to gather his thoughts before Roland snatched the chance to verbally steamroll over him. Even a passing glance at the councilman’s aura was enough to confirm Rhys’ suspicions that this was something Roland had been hoping to keep quiet. When he spoke, Rhys’ tone was anything but impressed. “You wanna explain all that to me or should we go over the intimate details together?” 

[councillor-roland]

The more Roland tried to stall the more worried Rhys seemed to look. He supposed he was making it rather obvious that he didn't want Rhys to know the extent of how bad it had been which was essentially indicating that it had been much worse than he was admitting to. The imploring look the witch gave him was difficult to ignore so he'd reluctantly revealed what he had though still tried to downplay it. What use in telling Rhys just how awful it had been for him? The witch already felt bad, had already apologized, did he really need to grasp the true extent of Roland's suffering? They were together again, that's what mattered, and could put it all behind them. Rhys apologized again and Roland's expression softened even further as their eyes met once more. He nodded, taking the promise at face value, warmed and heartened by the sincerity of it all. Roland believed him, of course, there seemed no reason not to. "Then there's no further need to talk about it anymore, is there? It won't happen again, we can put it all behind us. I forgive you, cheri, of course I do." There was no option not to forgive him as far as Roland was concerned. He smiled a little and leaned into the forehead kiss though frowned slightly at the offer. "You shouldn't have to, the staff can handle it though I suppose you'd be quicker about it. You can if you'd like to but don't feel it's necessary." He stroked his thumb lovingly over Rhys' cheek once more, wincing as he suddenly remembered the state of the bedroom. "Let me go deal with the bedroom, it'll only take a few minutes." He leaned in and kissed Rhys again, meaning for it to be a quick peck but getting caught up in it before he finally tore himself away and zipped off with vampire speed.

The bedroom was in much the same state as the rest of the suite. Roland quickly went about stripping off all of the bedding and gathering up various discarded robes and other soiled items of clothing, shoving it all down the laundry chute. He remade the bed with new sheets and blankets, cleared away the ashtrays and dirty dishes and everything else, then opened a couple of windows to let some air in. It had only taken a few minutes, as he'd said, and satisfied that it was at least presentable for Rhys' viewing, zipped back out...only to find Rhys standing very near the bloodied couch he'd pushed into the corner with his back to him. Rather suddenly remembering what he'd done there with Gwyn, the transgression he'd all but pushed to the back of his mind given how mired in everything else he'd been, he felt his stomach twist in that sickening, guilty feeling that Roland most certainly hadn't missed. What was he doing over there? How foolish Roland had been to leave him alone in the room. "Cheri?" The word was quiet, almost cautious, as he approached at normal speed with a sinking feeling.

From the touches they’d shared already, brief glimpses and flashes of memory had spilled into Rhys’ mind before he could attempt to block them out. Fortunately, he’d found himself wrapped up enough in Roland to not pay them any mind, too selfishly driven by his own desire and need for a type of reassurance that only Roland’s presence could bring to pay any kind of genuine attention to what had been shown, though he kept such facts to himself for the time being. His brow furrowed deeper as an attempt at an explanation was made and despite his best efforts, the noise of disagreement made by the witch wasn’t quite as successfully stifled as its predecessor. The weight of Roland’s palm settling against his heart was a welcomed familiarity and though his concerns were rising by the second, Rhys appreciated the comfort the gesture always managed to bring, no matter the circumstances. The soft attempt to shift the line of questioning elsewhere was met with an imploring look from the witch and the desperate edge to Roland’s tone only served to further confirm his anxieties. As the vampire stalled for time, Rhys rested a hand over the one pressed against his heart to offer a reassuring squeeze, waiting patiently for (what he hoped to be) a proper explanation.

Rhys nodded as Roland eventually went on to offer a hint of insight but he quickly realised how naive he’d been in hoping for a deeper breakdown of events. It was obvious that there was far more to the story than Roland was willing to admit to and though Rhys couldn’t fault him for wishing to preserve some degree of pride, the witch’s clairvoyance was eager to show him a far more truthful version of events. Though his time in Mayfair had been brief in the grand scheme of things, coven requirements had called for relentless use of all forms of his magic throughout and alongside Bastjan’s simultaneous tutelage, Rhys’ abilities had strengthened without the witch even fully realising it. “I’m sorry,” Rhys murmured softly as he leaned into Roland’s touch again the moment it was offered, staring up at him partly in apology, partly in reverence. “It’s my fault. I’m sorry I was the catalyst for…” his voice trailed off as he nodded towards their neglected surroundings, “…all of it. I handled it poorly and treated you terribly ‘cause of it. Won’t happen again. Not now, not ever. I promise.” Straightening up slightly, Rhys pressed a tender kiss to Roland’s forehead, giving the hand over his heart another light squeeze of reassurance before glancing back at the state of the suite. “You’re right, though. Won’t take long to sort out. Five minutes, if that– if… you’re happy for me to take care of it, that is. Would that be okay with you?”

[councillor-roland]

For a moment, Roland though (or perhaps he just hoped) the distraction had worked. Undoubtedly it would be fairly short term, even if they got as caught up in each other as they were wont to do they would have to part eventually and Rhys had eyes, he'd see the damage. Still, Roland wasn't much for thinking ahead so he figured as long as it worked for a time he could figure out how to deal with it when the inevitable came up. For a handful of seconds, he gloried in the passion between them, the feel of Rhys' body and how they fit together so perfectly. He was truly rather desperate for him and while some distractions of varying kinds had been employed and worked a little over the last few weeks, Rhys was the only one that could truly satisfy that desire, replace that loneliness with true companionship, and in general return Roland to his usual self. Just their little time together so far had already done wonders for him and the more time he spent in Rhys' company the better he would feel. The world felt right again with Rhys in his arms.

Unfortunately, Rhys had clearly noticed the state of things before Roland's little maneuver as was made obvious the moment he pulled back from the kiss and asked. His hands slid to Rhys' chest, one settled very purposely over his heart as he glanced away, looking at the wall beside Rhys. "Can't we?" He asked, soft and half joking but a little desperate. Roland would very much like to sweep it under the rug but clearly Rhys wasn't interested in that. Roland stalled for a moment longer and sighed then shrugged, still trying to downplay it a little. "I told you the last few weeks have been trying. You're seeing the evidence of it. I've...spent a lot more time here than usual, not always in the best mood." That was an incredible understatement, to say the least, but Rhys surely didn't need to know how bad it had really been. "I didn't feel like admitting the cleaning staff. It won't take long to sort it all out, though." Then it could be like it never happened, at least Roland hoped so. He looked back at Rhys with a small hopeful smile, one hand lifted to cup his face, the other still against the witch's heart. "You're back now so none of it matters." He doubted Rhys would leave it at that but he could try.

Rhys had been so caught up in the simple pleasure of gazing adoringly at Roland once they’d settled inside the privacy of the suite that it had taken him a moment to actually take in the surrounding scene. It certainly wasn’t how Rhys remembered it. The shift in the atmosphere was enough to spark Rhys’ concern as his fears were confirmed. The aftermath of his departure had been just as explosive and torturous on Roland as he had worried it might be. No matter how many times Rhys had insisted that the break wasn’t going to be indefinite, that he would be back when the time was right (it wasn’t as if he could have put a time frame on the demands and complexities of coven leadership, after all), and that this was just something he had to do on his own. 

For the most part, that had remained true; the vast majority of Rhys’ time spent back in Mayfair had been filled to capacity with meetings, tutorial sessions, inductions, his own ascension ceremony and, unfortunately, having to attend family gatherings to discuss the ever-difficult subject of his mother and all the difficulties that accompanied her, even in her current state. (It had taken a little more of Rhys’ self-control each time not to suggest that all magical interference was halted and that nature took the course it clearly wished to, but that hardly seemed appropriate given the rather sombre mood already permeating the family home.) The lack of communication, however… well, that remained on Rhys’ mind, as it had throughout their reunion thus far, but the guilt surrounding it worsened tenfold as he briefly took in the extent of his departure’s impact. Before he could even attempt to comment on it, Roland had him against the wall with enough force to silence any coherent train of thought immediately. 

Rhys was torn as he returned the kiss. Though the gesture was a genuine display of just how desperate he was to remain as close to Roland as he possibly could to make up for lost time and opportunity, the nagging concern in the back of his mind grew louder with each passing second and as much of a relief as it was to finally have Roland pressed close, it wasn’t enough of a distraction to quell his rising agitation. Rhys indulged them both for a moment longer, savouring the sensation of how perfectly they fit together every time, no matter how much time had passed before reluctantly pulling back just enough to catch his breath. He wasn’t quite strong enough to pull away entirely; he’d missed Roland’s touch too much to deprive himself of it entirely. “What happened here, Ro?” The words were uttered softly, barely above a whisper as Rhys searched Roland’s gaze for clarification of its own kind; a hint of acknowledgement that this was something they needed to discuss, no matter how much of a relief their reunion had been thus far. He could have easily taken a glimpse for himself already – after all, a little clairvoyance often went a long way – but knowing Roland’s feelings surrounding Rhys’ more… subtle uses of his divination magic, the witch thought better than to add insult to injury. “You can tell me. I’m not going to judge you for it– we can’t sweep all that–” nodding towards the centre of the room, Rhys continued, “–under the rug when it’s staring us both right in the face.”

[councillor-roland]

It had taken Roland no time at all to become as attuned to Rhys as he usually was so he could tell that the witch wasn't quite as joyous as he was pretending, caught the furrowed brow and the way he looked at him. Perhaps he didn't quite buy Roland's dissembling about his state and his outfit did indicate something outside the norm. It was clearly the right thing to do, however, if Rhys already felt bad and this was supposed to be happy. They were finally back together, all they should be doing was delighting in each other. Roland almost brought something up about that when Rhys leaned into his touch and their eyes locked and all the words evaporated as he returned that adoring look. He felt like he could happily fall into Rhys' eyes. He frowned just a little at the qualifier of 'that long'. Hadn't they just agreed to never part? And an offhanded mention of his mortality that Roland tried not to let strike him like a blow. "Never leave me again at all, for any length of time." The kiss to his palm eased him a little and then...there it was. That smile, that beautiful smile that had been part of the reason he'd been so drawn to Rhys in the first place. Roland had missed it terribly. He mirrored it with his own smile as Rhys drew closer, chuckling a little at the words. "Would I get one if I did?" How easy it was to tease and he couldn't help kissing those smiling lips for just a moment before he pulled back. "We can go right now."

No sooner had the words been spoken then he wrapped his arms more tightly around Rhys and whisked them to his suite with vampiric speed. It was a maneuver he'd pulled many times before but it wasn't until they were standing in the midst of it that Roland realised...well, the state of things. He'd momentarily forgotten but was reminded quite suddenly with the stale smell of smoke, the dirty dishes, the bloody couch in the corner, the broken things on the floor. He took it all in hopefully before Rhys could notice and with another burst of vampiric speed pushed him up against the nearest wall (not enough to hurt but a little roughly, he knew what Rhys liked) and kissed him hard. It was partly a distraction but also an expression of true desire. They'd been apart for far too long and it made his heart sing to be pressed up against Rhys like this, to hold his face in his hands and kiss him with all the passion he'd lacked in the last three weeks.

‘Been better’ remained part of Roland if his current wardrobing was also to be taken in consideration – the usual exuberance was toned down, uncharacteristically palatable and Rhys felt a further pang of guilt register despite Roland’s rising elation at the confession and much-needed reunion in all its glory. Rhys wished desperately that he could bring himself to match Roland’s levels of unparalleled jubilation but the binds of his guilt held too firm a grasp upon his conscience to allow it. ‘Every moment without you was… trying’ the pause hadn’t gone unnoticed and Rhys tried not to hone in on it, his brow furrowing for a second before he schooled subdued happiness firmly back into place – now wasn’t the time to let the mask slip, this was meant to be a happy occasion. Dropping his gaze to scan it over Roland from head to toe and back again, the witch made a quiet noise of contention but didn’t press further, not yet, choosing instead to make the most of the present despite the nagging of his clouded conscience. For now, at least, he'd allow himself this one small joy.

Rhys leaned fondly into Roland’s touch as he gazed longingly up at him, the continuous ache of each minute spent without him in immediate proximity now seemed as if it were an affliction suffered lifetimes ago, but then again, the magnificent radiance of Roland’s presence always managed to render Rhys some degree of adoringly magnetised no matter how familiar they were with one another by this point. “That’s the last time it’s ever gonna happen. I’m never gonna leave you for that long again. I promise you that now, cross my heart and hope to– well, you know how that one ends. The point remains true, though.” Turning head to press a light kiss to Roland’s palm, Rhys straightened up to close the remaining few centimetres of distance between them again, a smitten smile settling comfortably into place as he allowed himself to tap into the depths of his love for Roland and really feel it for a change. “When were you thinking of being a gentleman and inviting me back to yours, anyway? Were you expecting a handwritten request?”

[councillor-roland]

Anyone else witnessing the emotional reunion who knew the circumstances likely would have thought it was very dramatic given how little time they'd actually spent apart. Outside observers, however, didn't know how it felt to love Rhys and be without him so their opinions were clearly invalid. Furthermore, Roland didn't care what anyone else thought. He felt strongly, he always had, and he refused to be ashamed of it. How could he be when the joy and elation was sweeping through him? Positive emotions were just as strong as the negative ones and he'd been mired in the latter for so long that it almost made him giddy to feel so good so suddenly. He'd happily take it, though, even if he caught the flicker of Rhys' smile as Roland leaned in to kiss him. No doubt Rhys was overthinking or feeling bad about something there was no need to feel bad about so it was just as well that Roland swept him into the kiss.

Roland could happily spend his eternity kissing Rhys, though that was hardly a new feeling. He'd often gotten so caught up in the act of it, the taste and feel of him, that he'd had the thought before. The vampire didn't see how he would ever tire of it but Rhys still did have to breathe so they unfortunately had to part. That hardly dampened Roland's spirits now that he knew, without doubt, that Rhys loved him. Yet the first thing Rhys did when they pulled back was apologize? What nonsense. "Don't apologize. It's a joy just to hear your voice again." The questions he asked weren't quite a joy though and Roland wet his lips, glancing away for a moment. "Me? I've been...better but what does that matter now? You're back." Best just to rush through that and hope Rhys didn't follow up too much. "You haven't missed much. Gwyn's here now, my youngest fledgling. He arrived shortly after you left." If other things had gone on that were more important, Roland had definitely missed them given the state he'd been in. Rhys insisted on continuing to apologize, though the lack of communication did warrant that. They would have to discuss that, wouldn't they? Rhys' next words melted him more than a little, though, and made Roland want to just sweep it all under the rug. Missed hourly? It was like every kind word and expression of genuine emotion helped heal the damage Rhys had done at a remarkably fast rate. "I'll hardly apologize for that." Roland mused, a spark in his eyes that hadn't been there in weeks. "I'd even glorify in it as a crowning achievement." Still, it would've helped to know that, that Rhys missed him so terribly while he was away. Roland might not have sunk quite so far if he'd known. "I'm glad to hear it, though." The softer, more earnest tone was back now and he stroked Rhys' face again. "Every moment without you was..." Roland almost said 'agony' but given how he'd been trying to downplay his condition over the last few weeks that seemed unwise. "...trying." That was better.

Even if he’d known that the eventual confession would have been a resounding success in any context, the slip-up felt significantly poignant given the separation they’d endured. With a little distance, he knew how ridiculous it likely looked from an outside perspective: they’d been apart for less than a month, barely the blink of an eye in the grand scheme of things and yet… the pain of such a brief separation had been exquisite, more agonising than something so seemingly simple had any right to be and that in itself had confirmed it once and for all for the witch. It was love in its simplest form and no matter how valiantly he tried to dispel and disprove it to himself on the rare nights where sleep evaded him without the security of Roland’s arms around him, Rhys couldn’t deny the obvious. The earnestness of Roland’s reaction made Rhys’ heart ache anew – How I've longed to hear those words – and the witch struggled to keep his smile in place in good faith as a familiar wave of guilt began to creep its way in. Fortunately there was little time for guilt and doubt to progress further as Roland pulled him into an all-consuming kiss and the intensity of the gesture provided an unavoidable distraction. 

After basking in the outpouring of emotion for as long as he could stand to think himself deserving of it, Rhys reluctantly pulled back and took a breath to steady himself. “Sorry, sorry, all I’ve done is whine about myself– how have you been? How were things here for the past few weeks? Have I missed anything?” You’d know if you’d made an effort to contact him Rhys’ conscience politely reminded him and the witch at least had the decency to look sheepish as he pushed the thought aside. “I’m sorry I didn’t check in with you more. We can discuss that in more depth later, I know, I just– I don’t want you to think that you weren’t thought of or missed during our time apart. ‘cause you were. Daily. Hourly. You’re a distraction even when you’re absent, Ro. That’s quite the achievement.”

[councillor-roland]

"It's all right." The moment Rhys' words cut off Roland reassured him, reaching a hand up to cradle the back of the witch's head, stroking his hair gently. "I'm here. I've got you." He'd hardly felt capable of taking care of himself for the last little while but the moment Rhys exhibited distress he was quick to try and look after him. It helped Roland, somehow, to be in a position where he could be there for Rhys and support him as he'd wanted to since the news had come from London. Now, finally, Rhys seemed willing to let him. Roland had been angry, of course, hurt and a whole myriad of other things and while those conversations would likely have to happen and soon he really just wanted to enjoy their reunion for now, to absorb this and treasure the moment and maybe start to feel like himself again.

The fierceness of the hug dissipated just a little as Rhys pulled back to look at him and Roland opened eyes that were still wet though the tears had yet to fall. He reveled in the feel of Rhys' hands on his face and kept his arms around him, feeling like he still needed the physical connection and might for some time yet. Roland frowned a little, concerned, as Rhys explained that he'd also fared rather poorly though thankfully he'd had help. "I'll have to send him a thank you of some sort for taking care of you." His hand slid down from Rhys' hair to cup his face, brushing his thumb gently over the witch's cheek. Roland arched a brow slightly and would've interrupted with an agreement that yes, the break had been very stupid indeed, but the next part of the sentence stole all his breath in a gasp. I love you more than I even thought possible. The words were like a balm or an elixir and Roland's whole being brightened at finally, finally hearing them. His expression became one of pure adoration and he smiled, warmed to his very core even as Rhys seemed to pause when he realised what he'd said. He didn't take it back, though, and Roland huffed a laugh, almost incredulous. "Yes, you might as well. How I've longed to hear those words from your lips, cheri. I love you too, so very much. Feel free to say it as much as you like." Roland couldn't imagine the effect it had on him, the joy it brought him, wearing off any time soon and he'd be thrilled to hear it each and every time. Roland leaned in and caught Rhys' lips with a soft, pleased sound, unable to not kiss him after hearing those wonderful, longed for words. It was slow but passionate, pouring all his own love, adoration, and gratitude into it, needing Rhys to know just how much he appreciated hearing it.

“‘m not gonna,” Rhys’ voice was muffled against Roland, the admission only just comprehensible. “I can’t– without you, it’s too much, all of it, I can’t–” try as he might, Rhys couldn’t bring himself to admit his failures aloud, still too recently stung by the shame of not meeting his own unrealistic expectations. Professionally, he hadn’t faltered, not for a moment. The only issue is that that was the problem. He’d placed coven life and the inheritance of his birthright above taking any time at all for himself. If he really thought about it, Rhys wasn’t entirely sure he’d even started processing his mother’s rapid decline. (If he thought just a little deeper, he also realised he’d felt more anguish and inconsolable grief following Seth’s dance with death, but now wasn’t the time to analyse any of that.) The lack of communication had been and remained inexcusable, Rhys knew that, just like he knew that it was lurking in the conversational horizon as something that had to be addressed no matter how unpleasant and frustratingly, he had no one to blame but himself for the consequences of his actions holding him back from truly appreciating the return of Roland’s presence to his daily life. 

Inhaling slowly to steady himself, Rhys straightened up to hold Roland’s face in his hands, silent for a moment longer as he took in the sight of him to confirm once and for all that this was real. “It, uh, it... turns out I’m actually kind of terrible at… existing without you, I guess. Don’t worry, outside help intervened here and there; I learned firsthand that Byron can cook something that looks halfway appetising when he puts his mind to it.” The breath of a laugh that followed lacked humour and Rhys’ gaze dropped self-consciously for a moment to collect himself before continuing. “I don’t want to be apart from you again. All that – yes, in hindsight, stupid – suggestion of a break did was make me realise that I love you more than I even thought possible. I need you by my side. I–” Rhys cut himself off abruptly as realisation dawned. He’d withheld those three specific words out of fear until now and though he’d had no intention of voicing them now either thanks to that same rampant emotional cowardice, it seemed the lack of Roland’s companionship had left him lightheaded and now that he finally had it back in full force, the need to filter and repress himself seemed of no importance for the first time in a long time. Dropping his hands from Roland’s face to rest comfortably on his waist instead, still intent on keeping him close but not wanting to take his eyes off him for even a moment, Rhys considered his next words carefully. “Is what it is. Might as well say it to your face instead of keeping it all locked up.���

[councillor-roland]

Roland had been left more times than he cared to count. Sometimes involuntarily, far more often voluntarily. What was exceedingly rare in that whole series of loss was someone returning to him and so, naturally, Roland hadn't been able to help assuming the worst even if Rhys had assured him he would come back. Amazingly, at least to Roland, Rhys had kept his word on that score as he reminded him with those quiet words and Roland nodded. "You did." He agreed, shakily, his words trembling even as his body did, so relieved and overwhelmed to be back in Rhys' arms that he couldn't seem to help it. He didn't think he needed to voice the fact that he hadn't really believed him, had though the 'break' was just a soft way, introductory way of leaving him for good. Roland was entirely unwilling to let Rhys go, to put any space between them, not when Rhys was holding him just as tightly in return. The vampire let his senses flood with the witch; the familiar scent, the reassuring beat of his heart, how it felt to hold him after so long and the tickle of his breath against Roland's neck. He drank it in, drowned in it. This. This was what he'd needed, what he'd longed for for weeks and it was overwhelming in the best way to have it all back so suddenly.

Roland swallowed hard at the vulnerable admission, curling his fingers into the back of Rhys' shirt and only clinging to him harder. "I missed you too. More than you could possibly know." The words seemed inadequate to express how it had really felt. The crushing, alienating feeling of being alone, the aching sadness, the failure of anything being able to fill the void Rhys had left, no distraction really lasting long enough or soothing Roland in quite the right way. Tears pricked his eyes at the apology and he leaned his face against Rhys'. "Don't do that again." There was a catch in his voice as he spoke even if the words were quiet, far more of a plea than a command. "Don't leave me again. I couldn't take it." Roland believed how sorry Rhys was at the same time he didn't think the witch realised just how much the abandonment had affected the vampire. Being in Rhys' arms again, though, holding him and feeling cared for was already starting to help heal the damage.

The sound of Roland’s voice was delicate enough to make the shattering of silence a less brutal affair than it could’ve been given how deeply Rhys had fallen into his thoughts and spiralling neuroses with each passing second without Roland’s presence at his side in otherwise fondly familiar territory. He hadn’t had to wait long for it, though. Such a fact didn’t come as any kind of surprise but whenever he lost himself to his overthinking spirals, it was always challenging to gauge how much time he’d lost to (over)analysing to the nth degree. He willed himself to remain in place as Roland drew closer, his gaze fixed on him until there was barely a breath between them. Every instinct beckoned him to lean into Roland’s touch the moment it registered but Rhys forced stoicism firmly to the forefront of his mind; the guilt he harboured for his abrupt departure forbade the witch from enjoying too much too soon. There was no time to wallow in the uncomfortably familiar mires of whether he was deserving or not now, not when the hug that followed the tender gesture was tight enough to knock the withheld breath from Rhys’ lungs from sheer force alone. Regaining what composure he could in record time, Rhys manoeuvred himself as best he could within the vampire’s hold to cling to him and tether himself to something. 

All hopes of maintaining any kind of front or cohesive composure dissolved the moment he was cradled adoringly against the one he’d yearned relentlessly over from the moment he’d left the castle. “Told you it wasn’t going to be forever,” the words were equally as quiet as Roland’s had been before, the trust in his voice remaining level unsurprisingly minimal. “Told you.” Originally, Rhys hadn’t been able to give an estimate for the date of his return; too many monumental shifts were occurring concurrently for Rhys to think clearly, to act even half as rationally as he would under regular circumstances. Now that he was back in Roland’s arms, however, Rhys couldn’t fathom why he’d ever want to be anywhere else. Desperate to remain as close as physically possible now that the honour and the privilege had returned, Rhys held Roland tight against him as the depth of emotion behind his words reverberated through the very essence of the witch’s being. “I missed you so much,” Rhys murmured, the vulnerability in his tone unmistakable. “So much. I'm so sorry.”

[councillor-roland]

Roland had barely heard from Rhys in three weeks which had seemed like a terrible premonition of how things might continue to be for who knew how long. The lack of communication coupled with the way they'd left things (primarily angrily though there had been some pleading on Roland's part) hadn't helped Roland's mental state in the least and the suite had only continued to accrue more overflowing ashtrays and dirty wine glasses. Roland couldn't seem to bring himself to care. While at first he'd attempted to be seen about the castle outside of meetings, he only left the suite when he was absolutely required to now which was really only for council meetings. His mood only grew heavier and more despairing with each passing day. The text informing him that Rhys was coming back for good should have lifted his spirits when he received it and he certainly responded enthusiastically but he couldn't seem to trust it, couldn't seem to muster up the hope that Rhys actually would come back and lived in fear of a 'things have changed' text. The vague nature of the timeline wasn't encouraging. Best not to hope at all, even if some rebellious part of him did think that just maybe things were taking an upturn.

The vampire had been lying on one of the couches, disheveled, smoking despondently as was his new habit, staring at the ceiling while Elvis crooned from the record player when his phone went off and he tensed. Picking it up, he blinked when he saw that it was from Rhys and that Rhys was, in fact, here. Roland sat up abruptly, feeling his spirits rise just a little. It had to be true, he wanted to meet him at the greenhouses. Then that meant....that meant that he was actually back. He should've taken time to look as immaculate as he usually did but the best he seemed able to do was to change out of his robe and slippers and into trousers and a shirt. They were well tailored, of course, all of his clothes were but it was far from his usual appearance. No suit, no accoutrements besides his sun ring. He barely even brushed his hair. There was a sort of nervous excitement thrumming through him that was starting to pierce the veil of the heavy sadness he'd been cloaked in for weeks but even so he didn't think it would dissipate entirely until he saw Rhys in the flesh.

That moment was upon him as he used his speed to appear near their spot at the greenhouses, though he stayed in the shadows for just a moment, just to make sure. Roland's breath caught when his senses picked up on Rhys. There he was. Roland swallowed and took that one unseen moment just to drink him in, achingly handsome under the moon and stars as always and even more so given the weeks it had been since they'd seen each other. "Rhys?" His voice sounded small and fragile even to his own ears as he walked towards him, first slowly but he couldn't maintain that and was in front of him practically a second later. Roland touched a hand to the witch's face gently, almost reverently, like he needed the physical confirmation to truly believe he was real. But he was real, solid under Roland's fingers and his expression crumbled as he pulled him into a sudden, fierce hug, burying his face in his neck and clinging to him, cradling Rhys against him. "You're back. You came back." His voice shook with emotion and he had to fight to get the words past the lump in his throat.

closed starter for @councillor-roland

Their last face to face exchange hadn’t been… pleasant. Rhys had mulled tirelessly over how poorly he’d managed to suggest the (quite frankly ridiculous, in hindsight,) notion of a break between the two of them whilst he settled matters back in London. In his mind at the time, it had made perfect sense. Rhys barely knew what he’d be walking back into once he was on unfortunately familiar ground again; he couldn’t comprehend the notion of having to be emotionally present for another when he knew he’d barely be able to allocate any time to taking care of himself. Communication between them both had been limited – entirely due to Rhys’ continued negligence. It hadn’t been a conscious decision; simply an unfortunate byproduct of a deeply unfortunate and chaotic time. It was with immense relief – and, if he was willing to be honest with himself, excitement – that just under a month later, Rhys was finally able to tell Roland that he’d be back full-time and that everything could go back to how it should be.

With a text sent to have Roland meet him by the greenhouses once the stars were sufficiently littering the sky above (with a little magical influence to make the spectacle all the more breathtaking), Rhys made his way to the favoured meeting spot a few minutes early, taking in the familiar surroundings with a fondness he hadn’t known himself to possess previously. Laughably, a small part of him felt nervous to stand before Roland again. Rhys knew he had a fair few questions to answer, had explanations to provide for such appalling handling of the demand for such sudden separation – foolishly though, he hoped the lovesick pining he’d endured by his own doing had been equally felt by Roland. For a moment, at least, he needed the affection and reassurance that only Roland’s presence was able to provide. For the time being he kept his head down, tried to keep his breathing and his thoughts level, and waited as patiently as he could will himself to.