#rewatching season 8 and the word choice caught my attention

[murphyhatesme]

Steve basically tells Alicia to lie in court because her daughter doesn’t deserve to lose her again. I thought that an odd choice of words.. I think this is Steve talking about himself and Doris at least in part. And when she asks him to then take care of said daughter if the system fails he actually has to take a step back. Realising that she (he) just isn’t enough, never will be enough and that Alicia (Doris) will never put her daughter (Steve) above her job..

Anyway that is just something I see in this scene..

[stxvercgersslut]

Apologise

Description: Jake’s been ignoring Y/n for weeks and only spending time with his friends over his own girlfriend. But after while she had finally had enough. One day she decides to confront him.

A/n: I just had to write this😂 after rewatching the film a few days ago how could I resist? It just needed to be written 😂 (I also made it modern time btw just so it was easier to write for 😂) yeah I know that this is extremely angsty but I promise that there’s a whole lot a fluff at the end so the angsty part is definitely worth it 🥺💞 Jake is one of my ultimate loves that definitely needs some more loving then he got 🥺I didn’t plan on making this a fucking novel but here we are 😂

A/n: and okay yeah this is once again another submission for @stargazingfangirl18 and @navybrat817 writing challenge how could I not? 😂

Prompts: 2. “Can you just not right now?”and 14. “Did I...fall asleep on you??”

Warnings: Mentions of smut (nothing too descriptive), argument, being ignored, language, mentions of parents dying, mentions of weight loss, just a whole lot of angst, mentions of being poor and small bit of fluff at the end.

Temporary tag list: @jtargaryen18 & @et-lesailes

For weeks Jake has been neglecting you. Much rathering to play football with Reggie Ray and Austin then even hang out with you, his girlfriend of literally almost 1 year. How the hell did that even make sense? You were his girlfriend! Surely you were more important then some football game right? Well wrong! Apparently football was his only love. You’d always come in second to all of that.

Over the course of those insanely long 8 weeks that he’d been pushing you aside you had managed to keep your calm, just ignoring it. Thinking maybe he’d just been having a tough time studying for finals and training for football season. But as time continued to pass, still no texts, calls or even a FaceTime, you began to fear that your once loving relationship with Jake was steadily coming to a almighty close. Something that really did scare the life out of you. You loved Jake with all your heart and to lose him over the fact that he’d rather play football with his friends then hangout with you would send your heart into meltdown. No way could you let this happen to the both of you.

The pair of you were pretty much inseparable during the early stages of your relationship, always opting to spend time over at his house in the warmth then be at home where not even your heater worked. Obviously his sister still trying to fuck him was a huge problem for you, usually making you uncomfortable whenever you were ther but Jake had assured you that nothing was going on between them. Besides, he was just as uncomfortable (if more so) as you were with the immeture and disgusting way Catherin was acting around her BROTHER!

You came from a much poorer family then Jake did. But, surprisingly to you, Jake hadn’t actually seemed to care that you didn’t have any money. In fact he actually much preferred it sometimes since he had gotten to spoil you rotten with peculiar gifts and meals at fancy restaurants that almost 100% of the time just weren’t your style. Yeah he was a asshole sometimes but that didn’t mean that you didn’t love him. Most days you even struggled to pay your rent in your lonely one bedroom apartment that you’d moved into once your parents had past away last year. But no matter how many times Jake had attempted to lend you some of his inheritance in order to help pay rent, you never wanted to take it. Too afraid you’d have to pay it back somehow. There was even a time where Jake had offered for you to move in with him, not that his parents would have agreed with that, yet he didn’t seem to care. Food was hard to come by when you were at home, so whenever Jake had been able to, He’d make sure that you ate or at least tried to eat since he knew that you struggled a lost due to the fact that before you’d started dating him it was hard to get food. You mattered way more to him at the beginning. But right now it didn’t seem like he really seemed to care even a little. No more being at his house for warmth, no daily check ups, no food payed for and no offers to help pay for rent. It was like he’d retracted back to his old self. This wasn’t the Jake you had fallen in love him. He’d changed.

But nonetheless, the tenderness between the pair of you was irreplaceable. So of course you couldn’t just let this come between what the two of you had. But this was going to be a tough one to crack! Especially since you literally hadn’t talked to Jake for 8 WHOLE WEEKS!!! That’s right two months with barely any contact apart from when you were sitting at lunch listening to him blabber on about football or some damn movie he’s watching with his mates. Come on y/n think! It can’t be that hard to figure something out can it?

❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅

There it was again! That unnecessary tension rearing it’s ugly head once again at your usual table in the cafeteria. Jake, being the popular dick he was right now, had made himself comfortable next to you. Slowly taking one quick glance at you before once again completely ignoring you without a second thought. 8 weeks of this bullshit! It was a Miracle that you hadn’t murdered him already for neglecting you the way that he had been doing for 2 whole fucking months! So of course it was understandable that you snapped. Just listening to his smug laugh as he laughed and joked with Austin about the new hot chic was enough to set your entire body on fire.

With a stern look on your face you finally began to talk. Worth a shot right? “So I was won—“ you began as you attempted begin a normal conversation with you boyfriend, not really giving two shits about the fact that you were interrupting his dirty minded talk with Austin since you didn’t really care for the blonde. But before you could even get 10 words out Jake had already stopped you “y/n I’m in the middle of talking with my friend.” He cockily spoke with a shit eating grub appearing on his face for a millisecond before he turned back to his mates in hopes of continuing his ‘innocent’ conversation. Oh but that was not at all what happened. “Oh my bad! Didn’t realise that me literally about to invite you over for sex was me interrupting you. Silly me. I’m only your girlfriend!” You bit back, your glare completely fixed on Jake, not even caring that Austin, Reggie Ray and Malik all now has their mouths wide open in shock like they were having a fly collecting contest. You were half expecting Jake to nervously laugh it off and practically beg for you to forgive him, resulting in a quickie in the janitors closest. But that wasn’t what happened at all. In fact no amount of overthinking could prepare you for Jakes next choice of words.

“Can you just not right now?” The raven haired boy pressed with a insanely serious look on his face now. All thoughts that he might have just been joking had left your head completely. Hearing those words coming from Jakes mouth were like daggers pressing into your head and twisting Infinitely. Not only had it been a shock to you but it had also been a shock to everyone on the table. Jake Wyler, the most popular jock, refusing sex? Most importantly refusing you? What the hell was wrong with him? Oh you intended to find out. But for now you just stood up, shooting one more hurt glare towards your boyfriend before turning on your feet and leaving your spot at the table. Instead seating yourself on a table further away from them so that you didn’t risk another hurtful comment. Now this really was getting out of control.

❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅

Currently, for some unknown reason, YOU were sitting on the large length couch at some unknown douchbags house as you sipped from your red cup. Eyes scanning the room eagerly in an attempt to spot your dick head of a boyfriend. Even if you hadn’t Necessarily been accomanied by Jake to the party you knew for sure that he was a party animal. So why on earth would he miss this? Especially since the place was filled with doubly intoxicated high school students who most certainly were underage drinking. But then again so were you.

However, as you say there waiting for your raven haired beauty of a boyfriend to walk through those doors and unintentionally avoid you once again, you continued to run over your incredibly thought out plan in your head. Knowing with every bone in your body that this plan was most certainly going to get his attention, if not make him throw you over his shoulder, take you back to his place and fuck you until you can’t walk for at least a week. Yeah maybe you were secretly hoping for that second one.

6 drinks in Jake finally arrived at the party, accompanied by Reggie Ray and that stupid smug looking blonde ashole who you had conveniently forgotten the name of at this point. Only this time your raven haired boyfriend actually acknowledged that you were even there by letting his eyes scan over your perfectly curvy body. Which tonight was barely even covered by that incredibly revealing outfit that consisted of: a risky white vest like short with a very thin material that let your light pink bra peak out underneath the fabric, paired with a nude coloured leather skirt that barely covered your ass and some beautiful black boots to accompany the rest of your outfit. Of course this particular get up just so happened to be the only sexy outfit that you owned due to the fact that Jake had bought this for your birthday when you had only just started dating. You could definitely still remember him insisting that you wore this exact outfit to any party he took you to. So why waste it? After all it was just hanging up in your closet.

Even from 5 feet away from him you could still hear the cogs working away in his brain as your outfit caught his attention instantly. And in a matter of moments he was already sauntering over to you. Step one: Grab his attention complete. Oh but he wasn’t going to win that easy. No way was that going to happen! You hadn’t just come to this party wearing such a risky choice of clothing that was so out of your comfort zone to just let him win so easily.

“Hey baby, you wanna dance?” Jake asked with a slight smirk on his face, almost as if he was pretending like all of that god awful neglect hadn’t happened. Which you weren’t going to forget about. But this was operation get Jake jealous after all so you really did have to forget about what he’d been doing, at least for a few hours so that you could continue on with your plan.

Step two: dance with another hot jock who wasn’t Jake. After careful consideration you finally picked your target. Austin. Why? Because you knew for a fact that you dancing with Jakes asshole teenage playboy of a best friend was definitely going to make him jealous. “Sure” you teased, pausing for just the perfect amount of time for Jake to walk closer to you and almost grab your hand before you continued on “just not with you” there it was! Almost a millisecond after the last syllable had left your mouth! That gorgeous face of Jakes contorting into a look of pure jealousy just from those four simple words. “Not with me huh? If I’m not mistake I’m your boyfriend, so why won’t you dance with me?” Jake questioned whilst he still continued to attempt to grab at your waist, failing miserably every single time since you dodged him.

Those words in themselves were enough to light the fire in the pit of your stomach. Reminding you exactly why you had come up with this devious plan in the first place. Jake needed to learn a lesson and he needed to learn it now! Or else you’d most likely end up breaking up with him. “Because I don’t want to dance with my neglectful boyfriend.” You spat back before sauntering over to where Austin was standing, grabbing onto his hand and with no word of warning pulling him onto the makeshift dance floor.

Fiftheen minuets had dragged on by as Jakes eyes remained glued to your figure. Red hot anger coursing through him every time he watched your ass grind up against his friends crotch. Was this pay back for him treating you like your were worthless for 2 months? Because if it was then this was some carefully planned out payback that was not going to be working out in your favour later. “What the fuck!” Jake seethed. The sight of you now grinding against Austin’s very noticeable buldge was the fine straw! Causing him to leap out of his chair, rush over to the dance floor, throw you over his shoulder and walked out of the room with you kicking and screaming for him to put you down. Finally putting an end to your hideous plan all together. This most certainly hadn’t been how you had expected this to go but boy oh boy were you excited to see what happened next.

It wasn’t until Jake practically threw you onto a king sized bed and began yelling at you that you realised that this wasn’t going to end in sex. Or at least for the time being it wasn’t “Austin?? Of all fucking people you could have grinded up against you chose that bastard? What the fuck y/n?!” Jake spoke, anger clear in his tone as he fists clenched together in the dark room. “Do you really think that was the greatest of ideas huh? Embarrassing me infront of almost everyone? You really are a fucking bitch sometimes!” Oh how he wished he could turn back time and retract those words. Jake regretted those words as soon as they had left his mouth.

But unfortunately it was too late, he’d already hit a nerve inside of you that had been so desperate to appear this entire time! “You’re really asking me what the fuck all of that was about? Seriously Jake you don’t know? You don’t know that you’ve been ignoring me for the past 2 months for no fucking reason and doing god knows what?” Oh you were beyond finished at this point. “Embarrassing you? I embarrassed you? Really? That’s rich coming from the man who embarrassed me infront of our entire high school in the cafetière by practically telling me to shut up infront of everyone when I was actually going to invite you over for sex? You don’t need to know why I did what I did. But I deserve a ducking explanation as to why you’ve been neglecting me for two months and ignoring me any chance that you get! I’m the one that should be asking what the fuck! Have you fallen out of love with me Jake? Are you cheating on me? What is it? Why are you ignoring me whenever I try to talk to you? I’m your girlfriend don’t you think I deserve a explanation?” And with that the tears began to fall from your eyes. Oh no you’d released a damn. This definitely wasn’t going away anytime soon. Shit. Every single word that has been said was unfortunately true. Now all that was left to do was wait for Jakes reaction.

Every single one of your words were like tiny daggers sticking into his chest. But every tear that fell from your eyes was poison strong enough to kill him. How had he let this go on for so long? How had he not seen how disgusting he was being around you? How had he not realised he’d stopped treating you like his girlfriend and more like a slut? He really had destroyed the only perfect girl in his life and what for? Some stupid football game and some boring study sessions with his private tutor that his parents had provided? This wasn’t right! None of this was right. Oh god how could he fix this?

“Baby....I—“ the Raven haired boy began, swallowing thickly as he took large steps towards you. Once again scooping you into his arms. But this time once you were in his arms he laid back down with you. Ignoring your weak struggles to get out of his grin before you finally calmed down and relaxed into his touch. Still sniffling due to all of the tears that had been falling from your eyes.

For the rest of the party Jake made it his mission to give you bet might of your life. Ignoring his friends and instead focusing all of his attention onto you without a doubt trying to make it up to you. Of course every so often he’d whisper a apology in your ear or kiss you deeply in an attempt to mend his guilty conscience once and for all. But nothing seemed to help at all.

❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅

By the time you woke up at exactly 12:04pm the next day, you’d found yourself wrapped up in Jakes arms as he began placing gentle kisses against the back of your neck and shoulder. Something he’d been doing for the last several minutes. “Morning beautiful” he mumbled upon noticing you were awake. “Hmmmm...morning Jake..” you hummed back blissfully as you turned round in his arms. Happily staring him in his beautoful baby blue eyes before kissing him deeply just enjoying the moment.

After a very tired Make out session your eyes seemed to widen in horror as you looked down at your almost completely nude body, a little confused as to why you weren’t completely naked or even wearing Jakes shirt. That just didn’t seem right. “Did....I fall asleep on you?” The words in itself causing you to cringe. But you never did receive a actual answer. Instead you were answered with a loud laugh before your boyfriends lips were back on yours. Instantly getting on top of you to finish what you had started the night before.

[kittyprincessofcats]

RWBY Volume 8, Episodes 8-12

All caught up with RWBY now! (Except for the premium only episode.)

So, two things first: 1. From now on, my blog will no longer be spoiler free for RWBY! I don’t have premium access, so no spoilers for that, but beyond that, I might now reblog spoilers for everything that’s been released to the public. Blacklist “#RWBY spoilers” if you don’t want to see them.

2. I was going to ask what the spoiler policy in this fandom in general is when it comes to premium access. From what I’ve seen, Youtubers usually wait a week before uploading their reaction videos, which I appreciate – but here on tumblr almost no one seems to hold back. I saw a spoiler for “Creation” before it was released publicly. The day episode 13 was released for premium access, I had to unfollow people for posting untagged spoilers for it. And when I went into a RWBY-related tag for one second, I saw a really big spoiler that put me in a very sour mood because it also happened to be very aggressively worded against fans of a certain character (basically, along the lines of “I’m glad X bad thing happened to Y character because I hate them and their fans”). So, that scared the shit out of me and I ended up looking up more specific spoilers about what exactly happened because I wouldn’t have been able to sleep otherwise. So, from what I’ve seen, this fandom’s spoiler policy is just “fuck anyone who doesn’t have premium access” 😒. Always nice to see people being so considerate.

With that said, let’s get into my thoughts on episodes 8-12. Under the cut, because unlike some people, I try to be considerate of others who might want to avoid spoilers.

- So, the Hound really was a person. Specifically, a person with silver eyes and that’s probably what happened to Summer. THANKS, I HATE IT. This is exactly what I feared it would be and what I didn’t want it to be. (I don’t want Ruby and Yang to have to fight and kill their grimm-ified mom, that’s too sad, okay?)

- I love that Whitley really came through and came up with a plan for evacuating everyone! He’s a good bean after all! And that he managed to press that button on the computer before running from the Hound? Amazing.

- Willow Schnee being one hell of a mama bear and summoning a thing to protect Whitley was epic. She was so close to breaking down before that, but then her child was in danger and she just jumped into action right away. Protective mom instincts ftw!

- Blake’s talk about how she looks up to Ruby and how she herself lost the youthful optimism Ruby still has was SO sweet! (Also, Ladybug is an underrated ship/friendship and I really don’t get why people say they never interact? Have you all just forgotten volume 1 and how Bumbleby’s first meeting happened because Yang was trying to wingman Ruby who was trying to befriend Blake??)

- Penny fighting the virus from the inside was amazing, she did so well! I also loved seeing Nora encourage her (and echo Blake’s earlier words back to her).

- Unrelated to these episodes specifically, but I tried to think about who my favourite RWBY charactes even are right now, and I find it super hard to narrow down because I love so many of them, but if I tried to somewhat narrow it down, then (in no specific order because don’t ask me to also come up with an order): all of Team RWBY (though Blake is a personal favourite), Ilia, Penny, Salem, Cinder. (But then again, I also love Winter and Qrow and Robyn and... you get it, it’s hard to narrow down. Oh, and of course Pyrrha, but... you know.)

- “Witch” was honestly my favourite episode of the bunch. That one was just so full of epic stuff. (And now I’m wondering if Salem being one of my favourite characters has anything to do with my love for witches. I used to be obsessed with witches as a kid. In every story I read that had a witch, the witch was always my favourite character.)

- Yang and her team sure found a way inside that whale fast! Also, really handy that Ren’s semblance evolved just in time for when they needed it. But hey, I don’t want to complain about convenient plot stuff too much. Sometimes the heroes are allowed to have a little bit of good luck.

- Hazel listening to Oscar and deciding to get both him AND Emerald out of there was amazing! He really does have a soft spot for kids and wasn’t kidding about not wanting more kids to die – we love to see it! I also think it makes for an interesting parallel that Hazel decided to do this right as Ironwood was sending students to fight on the front lines and Marrow was calling it out.

- I really liked Ren telling Yang she doesn’t have to hide her fear behind jokes. Ren being able to see emotions is going to bring about so many more good moments, I just know it!

- Emerald and “Hazel’s” talk with Salem gets so much better when you know “Hazel” is actually Oscar – Emerald has gotten so much better at illusions and fooled Salem herself! That’s impressive!

- It’s really practical that Ren could sense Emerald’s fear. But also, the group really didn’t have the time to discuss if Emerald was trustworthy – they needed to get out of there asap.

- The way Salem spits out the word “semblance” when she talks to Emerald shows again that she not only underestimates these “new humans” and their powers, but also considers them inferior. It’s a nice little detail how just her tone when she says that word says so much about her worldview.

- Yang straight-up running up to Salem and blowing her up was epic. It didn’t last of course, but it was still a super bold and epic move. I’ve talked before about how cool Yang is and she just keeps getting cooler.

- Yang calling Salem out was amazing and epic, too! And when she referred to Summer Rose as “my mom” that made me tear up just a bit 😢. (I really don’t like Salem’s smile when she says “her again”, though. I don’t want grimm-ified Summer, I really don’t want it, okay? keep it far away from me where I won’t have to see it.)

- I’m a bit sad about Hazel’s death, but it was a really fitting end for his character and a really cool way to go out. The way he looked at all of those kids in danger (proving again that that’s what it’s about for him), whispered “No more Gretchens” to Oscar, punched Salem in the face as she was about to hurt Emerald, injected all of those crystals into his skin (which looked epic, by the way), told Emerald to go, fought an epic fight against Salem and then grabbed her and set himself and her on fire, burning her like a witch – it was epic stuff! RIP Hazel, you died as a hero and went out in an incredibly epic way!

- Hazel’s sacrifice must have been super tough on Emerald. He died protecting her (and JOYR) and it worked. She got away from Salem, but only because someone else, a friend, died for her. Not only must it be awful for her to lose Hazel, she probably also blames herself. (And, as I’ve seen others point out, it was probably the first time in her life an adult did something to protect her. Wow. Someone get this girl therapy, please.)

- The whale getting blown up was an absolutely epic moment. From the music to the cinematography, I loved everything about it. (That said, I will miss the whale. RIP coolest villain lair ever.)

- I loved Watts’ speech to Cinder – and I’m saying this as someone who became a huge fan of Cinder this volume. I love her, but I also love roasting her, and a lot of what Watts said was stuff she desperately needed to hear. I honestly didn’t even like Watts before that moment, but that speech might have made me like him just a tiny bit. The way he just laughed when she dangled him from a building, the way he spelled it out for her that her methods haven’t been working and threw her failures in her face, the ending with calling her “a bloody migraine” – Like I said, I’m a fan of Cinder, but that was glorious and cathartic and beautiful to witness. But what makes it really perfect is Cinder’s reaction: The fact that you’d expect her to kill him or at least scream at him, but instead she spares him and just sits down and cries. I really love what they’ve been doing with Cinder this volume and that they’re finally showing her as someone way deeper than just a power-hungry villain.

- In general, let me quickly talk about Cinder, because even without having seen the last two episodes I can already tell you that she’s my standout character / favourite character of the season. (It was Ilia for Volume 5, Salem for Volume 6, Penny for Volume 7 – and now it’s Cinder.) I said back in my post about Volume 5 that I wish they’d do more with her because after becoming rather interesting in Volume 4 they just went back to making her a pretty flat villain – and I officially have to eat my words and apologize to RoosterTeeth right now! This volume proved to me that they know what they’re doing with Cinder and explained so much about her. I’m sorry for ever doubting the writing. I now want to go back and rewatch the whole show while paying more attention to Cinder and I can’t wait to see where her arc goes from here (yes, I want an eventual redemption, and what about it?). This volume is obviously setting up something big for her – I just have no idea what it is. And at the end of the day, she’s still the Maiden of Choice. She’s the key to the Beacon relic, and that’s going to become important eventually.

- Oh, and can I mention, just by the way, that I think Cinder looks amazing? I don’t understand all the people who say they miss her red outfits when this is clearly her best look yet. The black eyepatch, the cape, the earrings, the short hair, the high boots, the shorts instead of a dress, all the black – this is her absolute best look, period.

- I’ve also noticed that the scene between her and Watts is the first time Cinder has referred to Penny by name. She’s always referred to her with phrases like “some toy” or “Polendina’s creation” before, but this time she just called her “Penny Polendina”, then “Penny” again, and asked Watts how she’s supposed to take Penny’s power “if she’s dead” (not “destroyed”, which is what Watts said, but “dead” – something you say about a person, not a machine). I think somewhere down the line, Cinder has started to see Penny as a person and respect her as the Winter Maiden. Maybe it’s because of how Penny won the fight at Amity, or maybe (though this might be wishful thinking on my part) it’s because Penny questioned why Cinder serves Salem and showed her and Emerald mercy.

- Also, side-note: While I loved Watts’ speech, it sure is bold of him to call Cinder entitled when his own villain origin story is getting overlooked for a science project.

- Neo is an amazing little troll and I love her. From stealing the lamp and skipping along the ruins of the whale happily to those texts to Cinder, all of her moments were brilliant and hilarious.

- Some characters not just forgiving Emerald is totally fair and realistic. But, as I said before (and as Oscar also points out), they don’t have to. People think a ��redemption” – or let’s just call it switching sides instead of using such a loaded term – has to include everyone’s forgiveness, but it doesn’t. If Yang and Jaune never want to personally forgive Emerald, that’s okay. They don’t need to forgive her to recognize that she’s changed and work with her. And, as Oscar and Ren point out, Emerald’s abilities would be very useful to have on their side. So, personal feelings are fine and all, but right now they don’t have the luxury to dismiss a potentially very useful ally. (And same for Oz, by the way. It’s fine if they’re still mad at him, but they also need his help.)

- Also, have I already said that I’m very happy for Emerald? Because I’m very happy for Emerald for getting out of there! (Mercury’s and then Cinder’s redemption next, please!)

- F*ck Harriet for trying to get Winter in trouble for letting JYR go. I’m hating her more every second. And then she seriously said “Who cares?” about Ironwood’s plan to nuke Mantle? She’s the most unlikable of them all.

- Everyone’s reunions were so sweet! I loved Ruby and Yang hugging 😭. And Yang cupping Blake’s cheek and their forehead touch had me all 🥰 🥰 🥰.

- After he threatened to nuke Mantle, I hope we can all agree that Ironwood is a straight-up villain now. The most infuriating part is that he didn’t even have to do anything! Whitley and Weiss had figured out a way to save everyone in Mantle and the SDC ships to evacuate people were already there. All Ironwood had to do was let them evacuate everyone to Atlas, and then Penny would have opened the vault willingly and Ironwood could have used the staff to raise Atlas as planned. Problem solved! He should have just sat there and ate his food – but he was so pissed about things not going his way (or maybe he just genuinely hates Mantle that much) that he thought sabotaging the rescue plan and threatening genocide was a better option.

- I loved Marrow’s arc in these episodes and how you could tell more and more that his conscience was making him turn against Ironwood. First he questioned Winter when she was going to nuke the whale before JOYR were back, then he seemed shocked when he thought they were dead, then he tried to talk sense into the other Ace Ops after Ironwood’s ultimatum, and then he straight-up called out Ironwood himself. That last one was dangerous though, and he was lucky Winter was quick enough to jump in and pretend to arrest him, because Ironwood was going to just shoot him in the back.

- Speaking of, I wonder how long Winter has been planning to double-cross Ironwood. How long was she already disagreeing with him, but waiting for the right moment to make a move? Either way, I’m glad she was there to save Marrow.

- The Renora confession scene was so sweet and got me a little choked up 😢. I’m glad they sorted out their issues and told each other how they feel. But like I said before, I think Nora’s arc of trying to find out who she is without Ren is really good and important and Ren respecting that was really good and important as well. It was just a very wholesome scene. Also, I like that we got a little bit more backstory for Nora (her mom abandoned her? that’s awful), and Jaune awkwardly leaving the room was hilarious.

- Robyn telling Qrow he’s a better Huntsman than Clover because he chose to do the right thing was a really important moment for Qrow, imo. (And just a side-note: I’m sure most Fair Game shippers are pretty chill – and I’m a strong believer in ‘ship and let ship’ – but a certain subset of them is starting to get on my nerves with how they ignore Clover’s canon character and story (acting like he would have rebelled against Ironwood if he were alive as if the whole reason he’s dead wasn’t precisely because he cared more about Ironwood’s orders than doing the right thing) and how they make every new plot point about their ship somehow (Oscar’s semblance? Better be a time-travel thing so Clover can come back. Staff of Creation? Better be able to bring people back from the dead so Clover can come back.) It’s so annoying.)

- Yang and Ruby’s talk about their mom was really intense. Ruby’s been holding all of these feelings in for so long, so seeing her say out loud what we’re all fearing (that Summer was turned into a Grimm) and seeing both her and Yang break down over it – that was a lot. I loved seeing Yang comfort Ruby and tell her that her plan for Amity wasn’t useless. Their sisterly bond is so sweet.

- Penny asking Ruby to kill her was another really intense moment. The look on Ruby’s face in that moment really said it all. Ruby has been through so much, has lost Penny before, so hearing that request – even though they fortunately didn’t have to go through with it – must have still been a lot for her.

- I really loved Emerald’s cute “newly reformed villain” moments. (“You guys have been getting your asses kicked… some of that my fault” & “I’m just going to be super pissed if you all finally decide to give up the moment I switch sides.”) I’ve said before (in my She-Ra posts) that my favourite part of any redemption arc is the “former enemies, now awkward around each other” stuff, so this was right up my alley!

- “The girl who fell through the world” was referenced twice now. Between that, the image of everyone falling in the opening, and the lyrics “sometimes it’s worth it all to risk the fall”, I’m going to predict that someone – most likely all of Team RWBY – will fall into that void and potentially end up in a different world.

- The group’s plan to defeat Ironwood, stop the bomb, and get to the vault was amazing all-around. I love the parts Emerald and Winter got to play in it, I love how we saw the plan’s execution before seeing how they came up with it and I love how everyone got to help, even the Schnees and Klein. I also love that the hole Oscar blasted through the ground of Atlas became relevant again.

- The design of the vault and the door are really nice and now I wonder what the other two are going to look like.

- Saving Penny like that was super risky, but they really were out of options. Just the fact that Ruby had to be quick enough to use her semblance and get to the staff before the virus kills Penny… jeesh, that was close.

- Ambrosius is a super fun character! I love that he looked at Penny and said “I’d love to meet whoever did this.” Also, the staff seems more useful than the lamp. The lamp only lets you ask three questions per century, while the staff can be used as often as you want – as long as you’re okay with whatever it previously created disappearing.

- I honestly still don’t completely understand what Penny is now. Is she meant to be human now? Or is she just a being made up of pure aura? How does this work? Ambrosius only created the copy that destroyed herself, so what’s left is Penny’s aura – but she somehow also has a body now? I guess we’ll find out more about what exactly this means later.

- Also, while I wasn’t sure how I feel about this decision re:Penny at first, now that I’ve thought about it for a bit, I think it works. It fits with the Pinocchio story, and I like that they didn’t phrase it as “she’s a real girl now”, but as “this is the girl who’s been in there all along”. Also, Penny saying “wow” after hugging Ruby and then going on a hugging spree was adorable.

- Watching “herself” self-terminate must have been really traumatic, though. Even if that copy was just a robot, it was still a disturbing scene.

- Who shut down communications in the middle of Jaune’s broadcast? I’m assuming it was Cinder, Watts and Neo.

- The whole dimension with the doorways that Ambrosius created looks amazing. (A while before watching this episode, I wondered if Raven could theoretically save Atlas by getting everyone to safety with her portals. It might not have been Raven, but I’m glad I was at least onto something.)

- “Do not fall.” So, about that… they’re all falling in the opening, (and we referenced “the girl who fell through the world” twice now), so I don’t have a good feeling about that. Also, Watts has been dangled from somewhere high twice now, so the third time has to be when he actually falls down.

- And Cinder is there to ruin the plan because of course she is.

[hopevalley]

Season 8, Episode 10: Old Love, New Love, Is This True Love

All right, so...like I said, work has picked up and my eyes feel like old marbles from staring at numbers (the woes of working in accounting I guess) so I want to get this written up and tossed into the nether before I lose steam and motivation to do it. The interesting thing about these little write-ups is that as the week goes on they just get harder and harder to write...

I do apologize in advance to those who like the long-winded write-ups. I’m just not up to it at the moment. Still feeling kind of bleh from the episode.

Let’s go back to an old format, shall we?

The Good

We might as well start out with the things about this episode that I enjoyed! 

Gossip Hour with the Men was one of the best openers they’ve had on the show in a while. It was genuinely funny without being meanspirited. Nobody looked like the bad guy. Everyone just calmly talked about it alike it was a normal thing to maybe call off the wedding. Bill calling out Carson for giving marriage advice was pretty funny, Mike was a delight. I don’t know what to say. I’d watch a whole episode of The Boys just hanging around spending time together.

--

Florence’s worry that she’s ugly was...not a terrible idea for a storyline, but the actress is too good-looking to pretend to be ugly (I saw her in this pretty yellow dress on Instagram a couple years ago and she was smashing)? Also, it’s not like Ned is a handsomely aged gentleman (like Henry lol) so it makes even less sense for the characters. I think they should have gone with Florence feeling she’s “plain” and that dressing up Super Nice makes her feel uncomfortable because she just doesn’t feel like Herself and worries maybe it’s projecting a false sense of Who She Is or something? I guess overall I still liked that an attempt was made to add some depth to Florence and her difficulties in choosing a dress/hairstyle, so...it goes here.

--

Ned asking Henry to be his best man was nice, too. I can forgive the shoddy pacing and weird placement of this request (like I do with almost everything in the show) but only because the scene was just...so incredibly wholesome. 

I like how Henry just casually is like, “Well maybe today’s just not the day.” I think it eased Ned’s mind just a little that he CAN back out if he really wants to.

I think it’s worth thinking about the fact that Ned and Henry would have always worked very closely, since the mercantile would have been a company store before the mine closed down... I like Henry and Ned as pals.

--

I’m glad the “investment” thing with Jesse and Clara’s savings was brought up in a way that...makes sense. And also, glad it wasn’t forgotten.

--

I really liked Molly and Florence in this episode. I’m a little sad Florence married Ned because I AM SORRY BUT I WANTED TO KEEP SHIPPING MOLLY AND FLORENCE TOGETHER UGHGHGHH

But their relationship is so good and maYBE Elizabeth will learn something from them.

Hey Elizabeth...you see that?

YOU SEE THAT?

Just saying.

And then later...

“You are the sister I never had, the mother I forever wanted, the friend I have always needed. From the depths of those dark and terrifying coal mines you’ve walked beside me, picking me up whenever I’ve stumbled along the way.”

AAAAAAAAA IT GOT ME.

--

I’m...really liking Fiona and Mike’s relationship, whatever it is. I kind of think they’re not headed toward anything romantic. Everyone thinks Mike is really into Fiona but at the end of the episode we realize he likes talking to her about business; it’s almost like they have this shared passion for numbers/ideas and he likes infodumping to her (and vice-versa).

I think they’re going to end up being “just friends” and Fiona will end up paired off with the man Elizabeth doesn’t choose. They hinted at Nathan briefly in this episode (with Allie’s hair), but who knows? I’m over trying to speculate on where the triangle is going at this point, but I actually like Fiona’s relationship with Mike so much that I’ll be disappointed if she fades into the background with Nathan or Lucas. Mike deserves more screentime. 

--

Ned and Florence sharing their fIRST KISS. My husband got emotional over this. And I admit, it was starting to get to me, too. I can’t NOT root for them. 

--

I said it before and I’ll say it again: I WOULD DIE FOR THE CANFIELDS.

--

The wedding was nice. I liked that Bill and Joseph officiated it together; it gives Joseph a li’l trial run of pastoring and finally Bill gets to use some of that power of his to officiate a wedding.

“Please, if you’d like” is such a Bill way to say that they may kiss LOL.

--

Also, I have to admit that I did enjoy Lucas calling Nathan out about Allie. She wouldn’t be caught in the middle if he’d leave Elizabeth alone AND HE IS RIGHT LMAO.

The last good thing: Elizabeth telling Nathan she doesn’t blame him for Jack’s death. Nice. Good. Thank you. He probably needed to hear that.

--

...THE BAD

Carson and Faith. UGH. UGHHHHHHHHHH. BREAK UP ALREADY I HATE YOU BOTH.

I appreciated that Carson had the ring ages ago, and I did like his conversation with Minnie—or more accurately, her advice to him. I felt like she was nudging him toward, “Remember why you became a surgeon in the first place.” If he became a surgeon to help people, then there’s no reason he can’t help people where he is. Sure, he might not be doing state of the art procedures but with Faith working alongside him, he can afford time to learn new things and go to doctor conventions or even take a specialized class now and then. No other doctor could get away for very long but he has that chance!

And he’ll arguably be doing more good in the middle of nowhere than in the city. All the doctors want to live in the city. Nobody wants to barely get paid for their time in the countryside.

We had a whole episode that made it clear that Faith and Carson don’t make a lot of money and do a lot of charity work. They also work for trade goods (mostly food). So it’s like...a pretty big difference in lifestyle? 

Half the reason I can’t get invested in these characters is because I really can’t stand Paul Greene. He just...annoys me on every single level imaginable. But he’s a decent actor and I can’t help but feel that his character was a massive waste of space for the past few seasons through no fault of the man himself. Imagine introducing a character like Carson and then leaving him to rot before you try to make him interesting with a romance plot that nobody asked for.

Yes, some people really like Faith and Carson, but as a whole I think the fandom didn’t buy into them as a ship due to the lack of chemistry.

It really is a shame. This episode didn’t do a thing to endear me to either character. Please, Carson. I am begging you to leave town.

--

This one particular line of dialogue almost enraged me.

WE KNOW WE KNOW WE KNOW WE KNOW WE CAN SEE THAT FOR OURSELVES. WHY DID THEY HAVE ROSEMARY SAY THIS LIKE IT’S AN EPISODE OF A CHILD’S TV SHOW?

--

Elizabeth.........

How could Katie have...looked up to her? She was never in her class? That was? Never part of anything? It was just something they threw in here to force Elizabeth to make 1% more sense in the role she’s in but IT STILL DOESN’T WORK.

I felt like I was back in Season 5 again with Lori and Elizabeth putting their nose in everyone’s business except it’s just Elizabeth!! The whole plot, which was boring and contrived anyway, should have gone to Molly, since she’s Florence’s best friend and another woman from town that Katie would have known as a child.

AND ALSO, MOLLY WOULD HAVE KNOWN KATIE’S MOTHER AND WOULD REMEMBER THE GRIEF THAT NED STRUGGLED WITH.

I know they wanted to make Elizabeth give advice so that she’d Realize that she needs to, I don’t know, make better choices or something, but it was too on the nose for me and I hated it.

GinithePooh on Reddit made a good comparison to Elizabeth in this episode by saying she reminded them of Clippy from Microsoft Word, always popping up and offering to help when nobody really needs or wants advice.

To honor their incredible idea, I opened Photoshop and created this gem, which I will also be posting separately so that people can reblog it if they wish to.

I also don’t think I need to say also filed under The Bad is the fact that Elizabeth didn’t even apologize for being awful to Rosemary and then gave her unsolicited advice to other people for two days straight. I can’t believe they wrote that? 

All I can say is that her apology to Rosemary, when it comes, better be good.

--

And I didn’t like this either:

I wish it had been followed up by literally anything: Nathan saying he’s sorry he didn’t tell her sooner or something to make the hand-holding actually be a little more innocent.

As it is, it just seems so deliberate? 

Maybe the next episode starts off right in this scene and we’ll get that? If so, this might actually end up being fine. I just don’t think it is if it doesn’t get a little more direct attention.

--

& THE UGLY

I debated on putting anything in here, because I’m not ready to talk about my feelings on this matter, at least not fully. But I’ve been pretty quiet all season so far, and...eh, why not just mention things in advance? What will it hurt?

Let me preface this section by saying I’m biased and I doubt hardly anyone on this site will agree with me, so feel free to just ignore this part if that’s the case.

There are two things that I really didn’t like in this episode.

I hate the slanting toward Bill/Molly.

I like Molly just fine but I don’t like her with Bill. I’m biased as all getout and also worried about the future/potential Season 9 with regards to this. I don’t want to see it. Like at all. Why, you ask? You should know why if you follow me. I’m super transparent.

It’s because I like AJ AND I WANT HER BACK LOL.

John Tinker rewatched the series so we know he wouldn’t have missed that hanging plot thread—especially since he didn’t forget any of the other things that were brought up this season! So why didn’t she appear this season? The love triangle absolutely needed to be a focus or it would have never ended, so that’s part of it, but I’m also pretty sure Josie Bissett wasn’t interested in doing any filming last year during Covid. My only “proof” is that Wedding March 6 wasn’t filmed last year even though it was scheduled to be filmed, but it makes sense. Last year was chaos.

THAT SAID, Jack Wagner posted on his Instagram the other day that they are actually filming Wedding March 6 now, so... I guess AJ’s re-appearance in Season 9 wouldn’t come as too much of a surprise if they wanted to write it.

You’d think I’d be hyped about that, and I kind of am? But it doesn’t come without its share of worries, too. We just had the worst love triangle in the history of love triangles and I really don’t want another one, especially if it makes any of the characters in question look stupid or mean.

I fully admit a well-written love triangle could be a LOT of fun for them* (low stakes because they’re not front and center characters), but I saw how Nathan was written so far this season and I really, REALLY do not want to see that happen to Molly, Bill, or AJ.

Anyway, not a fan of the Molly/Bill stuff. No chemistry. I don’t want it.

*I would totally write a fanfic like this lmao.

--

And finally...the part that everyone will hate me for:

I DO NOT WANT TO SEE ABIGAIL COME BACK. And I specifically do not want her to come back ‘cause I do not wanna see Henry/Abigail happen.

I fully recognize that a lot of you like it and ship the heck out of it, and that’s...good. I’m glad you enjoy it. I loathe it, though, and I worry that all these hints (more like...mentions) are leaning toward...something. Like, either they’re:

1) Sending Abigail off/tying up that loose end with Henry (since nothing was ever clarified either way), or

2) Warming up the audience to receive Abigail back on the show.

I’m pretty into the idea of one-sided Henry/Abigail. Hindsight is 20/20, regrets, that’s all some juicy stuff to give a character like Henry. Some things can’t ever be made right again. He had too direct of a connection to the death of her husband and son for me to ever want to see them together. Forgiveness? Yes. A careful but meaningful friendship? Yes. Romantic relationship? Uh...no thanks.

I liked the Abigail mentions at first because I felt like...the character still mattered (as she should) but I’m at a point where I feel like they’re trying really hard to steer the fandom’s view a certain way and not knowing where it’s going is extremely unsettling to me.

--

I’ll probably talk more about the things that bother me when the season ends, because I’m hoping to have a better idea of where things are going to be headed, but for now just...know that I feel very apprehensive.

And keep in mind that I primarily watch this show for Bill these days, since all my previous faves (AJ, Frank, the old Abigail, Dottie) have exited, stage left. I also always really liked seeing Henry. So as you can imagine, seeing plotlines I hate for the only two characters I’m invested in? Is making me consider dropping the series next year.

My husband told me I should hate-watch it, but I don’t know if my heart can take it. I’ve been following this series for so long...it just...kind of hurts to feel let down like this? 

But sometimes an ongoing series ends up going where you...didn’t want it to, and it becomes something that’s no longer right for you. I hope that doesn’t happen, but last night’s episode makes me feel like...it might be happening for real this time.

I guess if that holds true it’ll be back to fanfiction for me. Will that novelization I planned ages ago end up getting written? Will I write the best love triangle fanfic known to man? WHO KNOWS.

For now, we’ll all have to wait and see! Two more episodes left. I’m really curious to see how they resolve some of the open plots right now. :>

[ezilyamuzed]

There’s no place like home - Part 8

Summary: The reader has had a unique gift all her life. While considering it a curse, she discovers the identity of her real father after her mothers passing. Journeying towards her new life, she finds herself thrown within the Winchester’s world. Is it her destiny?

Setting: End of season 13. This takes place after episode 13.18.

Warnings: Language. Some angst, fluff, drama- a typically SPN episode.  POV may switch after certain sections. 

A/N: I’ll apologize now, what you are about to read is a bit of an emotional roller-coaster, at least it was for me. This was not all in my original plan, but I am happy it had happened. I’ve been rewatching the series and during this time I was on Season 5 where Jo and Ellen die, tears still coming although it was probably the 10th time I had watched it. Amazing how much character’s relationships can still make your heart break years after. I promise more interesting things are on the way. We aren’t even close to done.

Any grammatical mistakes are all my own, because I am human. Remember all comments and feedback are welcomed! If you want a tag in future posts regarding this series or other writings please send an ask! As always thank you for reading! Enjoy!

Sam and Dean had shifted glances to each other, their Adam’s apples bobbing as they swallowed hard, waiting to see who was going to answer your question of why they had brought up the men of letters. You stood there patiently waiting, leaning up against the end table with your arms crossed while watching the apprehension move between them.

“Well, guys? Why does some boy band called the Men of Letters matter?”

“You said a man and woman came to see you?” Dean questioned while raising his eyebrow.

“Yeah, some British guy. Ketchup or something,” you chuckled while trying to remember what it really was. 

Dean squeezed his eyes tight while shaking his head. “You mean Ketch?”

“Yeah that was it, and the girl was Campbell, like the soup. I guess I had food on the brain that day,” you laughed.

“Campbell?” Sam coaxed.

“Yeah, um Mary,” you said looking into his inquiring face. Flashes of your memory went through your head as you tried to recall the details. “She seemed a little uneasy being there… actually, her light was different like yours too.”

Sam and Dean stared back at each other again like they just witnessed a nuclear bomb go off in front of them and were frozen in place. Dean tilted his head slightly to Sam, encouraging him to speak first with his eyes. Sam gave an audible sigh and ran his hand through his hair before speaking.

“Mary Campbell is Mary Winchester, our mom.”

“And the dick with her is a part of the Men of Letters from over the Atlantic,” Dean included.

“We think that your grandfather was involved somehow, here in America,” Sam said while moving to grab the mahogany frame. “This is the outside of their bunker, their safe house if you will.”

You held up your hands to stop them. “Whoa. Back up there. Your mom? But she is…”

“Yeah not so much for a while now,” Dean interjected while sitting himself down on the end of the couch. “That’s a long story.”

“Are there any Winchester’s that stay dead?” you blurted while sitting yourself across from him in a steady recliner, feeling the tension radiating off of them by your words. You didn’t mean to say it, it just…came out. A lingering silence fulfilled the room before you spoke again. “So why do you think that is a picture of their safe house anyways. I mean it could be anywhere. It doesn’t exactly have ‘men of letters hideout shack’ written all over it.”

“Because we’ve seen it. We’ve been there. Hell, it’s our home,” Sam stated while moving to sit next to his brother. “The quote ‘There’s no place like home’ written on there, it’s a reference to the Wizard of Oz.”

“Yeah, so what? Next, you are going to tell me Dorothy is the leader,” you scoffed while shaking your head.

“Well she was definitely a part of it,” Dean replied while sitting himself back further into the cushions.

“Wait. Click your heels three times Dorothy? We’re not in Kansas anymore Dorothy?”

“Her father, L. Frank Baum wrote the stories, he was a member during his lifetime. She was trapped when she had followed him into Oz, so he left clues in his writings for her.,” Sam informed you calmly. “A couple of years ago we released her from her spell with the Wicked Witch, and as far as I know she is still in Oz. Our friend Charlie would have been able to explain this all so much better.”

Charlie rang in your ears, completely erasing the absurdity you had just heard about the Land of Oz existing and one of your favorite childhood stories. The image of her smiling face lighting up the room forced itself into the forefront of your mind. 

“Charlie Bradbury,” you mumbled while moving your face towards the ground. Dean and Sam’s eyes shot at you in confusion to how you could have possibly known. Feeling their eyes on you, you raised your head to meet their stares while giving an audible exhale. You got up to grab the old photo album that you had frantically searched and found earlier. Flipping through the pages you found the one that you were looking for. Hesitating in your steps you watched their curiosity grow for their unspoken question. Walking over to them, you held it open to Sam’s reach.

“Like I had said before, I’ve heard about you two from others.”

Sam’s eyes widened in shock as he looked at the old Polaroids. There was Charlie, with her signature full body smile and you equally as happy. Both dirty like you had just been in a fight, but cheerful nonetheless with pride of accomplishment shining through.  Feeling his brother trying to see what you had given him, he leaned the book over. Dean gulped hard while focusing on the pictures, his eyes shifting furiously over the photos. 

“There was a ghost not too far from where I lived,” you quietly uttered. “She came in looking for information from my mom and found me instead. We took it out together. Honestly, given the circumstances, it was one of the best hunts of my life.”

“Y/N, Charlie…” Sam started to speak with sorrow in voice.

“You don’t have to tell me, Sam. I know what happens on the job,” you interrupted while giving him a tight-lipped nod. Watching Dean still steading his eyes over the pages. “There is more too that you should probably know. Turn back a couple pages.” 

You could feel the emotions from earlier rising again within you as you watched him turn back the pages, stopping when he saw the familiar faces. His mouth dropping in disbelief. 

“Ash,” he whispered while leaning the filled pages to Sam. “Jo. Ellen… How is this possible?”

“Ash is a long story,” you chuckled lowly while remembering your oldest friend. “Basically we were friends in high school and stayed in contact well after. He would help me out with cases and things like that. He was actually one of the few people who knew about me and what I saw. I met Jo and Ellen when I was looking for him, finding her took up permeant residency at the Roadhouse.”

You could feel the emotions trying to push through your eyes as you spoke but you shook them off, putting on your best fake smile you could muster. Sam sat completely still lost in his thoughts, looking out to nothing in front of him. Holding onto the album tight, Dean looked up to you, his glossy eyes meeting yours.

“Y/N…I’m sorry.”

You shook your head before speaking up again. “I know, I mean… I already know what had happened to Ash from Ellen afterward. I kind of figured whatever was going on wouldn’t take long to catch up to the rest.”

“They died fighting,” Sam uttered, breaking out of his thoughts.

You shifted in your seat, feeling anger you had suppressed running through your veins as he said it, screaming at you to avenge your fallen friends by taking down the causes that sat comfort on your couch in front of you.  Your gut and your heart advising you to allow yourself to just sit in the silence, remembering the lives of the fallen with them. You chose the latter, while Dean now was sifting through the album, looking to see if there was more. The old-aged open letter fell out into his lap. You went to say something but the words written on it had already caught his attention. His eyes scanning it over and over while his brows furrowed, before looking up to you in disbelief. 

“I guess I was supposed to meet you a long time ago,” you quietly answered his unspoken question while exhaling back into your chair. “I couldn’t open it. I couldn’t bring myself to… not until today.”

Your anger quickly boiling over that you had worked so hard to hold back. It wasn’t just at them though, it was at yourself. If you had only been brave enough to read a god damned letter, so many things could have changed. Jo and Ellen might still be alive. Charlie would be here. Your dad? You might have actually gotten to know your real father, not just going off of others words, but actually known him. If you would have just opened the god damn letter your whole world could have changed.

Dean had handed the letter over to a curious Sam while you felt your heart beating fast and your muscles tighten as the rage grew inside of you. “Y/N, if we would have known…”

“Known what Dean?” you snapped. “That the people you drag into all of your shit have their own friends and family that you throw into danger?”

The words fell out like vomit, you had no control over them as they spilled out. His face dropped and eyes widened like you had just twisted a knife into his gut.

 “You know what Dean? Save all of your apologies. I don’t want to hear them.”

“You listen here princess,” he yelled while standing straight up in his spot, face turning dark red in the heat of his rage. “That is a part of the damn job. They knew what they were getting into. Every single one of them. We tried to save but they made their choices. Don’t you dare put all of this on me.”

You could feel your breathing turn rapid as you clenched your fist to punch time right in his perfect jaw as he spoke. Looking into darkened his eyes you could see the anger, sadness, and self-hatred all mixed hiding away behind them. A sea of tears trying to escape. You saw the truth in them, not only had you blamed him, but he was still blaming himself. Your words had cut open a wound that time had not healed. You closed your eyes and took in a deep breath, trying to relax your muscles as it set in. 

“There is no point in this. In us yelling at each other,” you sighed, knowing that no matter what you did, the past could not be changed. Moving forward was the only option. “There have been tough choices that we all have made, that I know we all regret.” 

Sam and Dean both nodded their heads in agreement as you took in a deep breath and raised yourself to obtain another beer from the kitchen. Sam followed your lead, leaning on the counter while you popped the top off. He went to open his mouth to speak but you stopped him in his tracks.

“Not talking about it anymore Sam,” you said before taking a large gulp, downing almost half of the contents. You let out a low burp that made him quietly snicker, breaking the tension. “So what is up with the boy band you’re in? The lettermen.”

“The men of letters,” he corrected you as Dean walked in red-eyed, with an obvious tear stain on his cheek. He rubbed his face with both hands while Sam continued. “Basically there were like elite hunters. They complied almost every lore and spell book you could imagine.”

“Were?” you queried before taking another sip.

“Yeah, a bitch knight of hell, Abaddon, pretty much wiped out the membership in 1958,” Dean responded while grabbing for his own beer. “All that is really left is a few legacies, like Sam, me and well I guess now you too.”

“Our grandfather Henry Winchester was a member,” Sam added.

“Yeah, he was an alright guy. Kind of self-righteous,” Dean quipped. 

You pushed your head back in confusion, squinting your eyes to Dean. “He was? You just said she wiped them out.”

“Time travel spell,” Sam responded in seriousness. “He traveled to his next of kin in the future, escaping while luring her here.”

“Through the closet,” Dean chuckled while taking a sip of his beer.

“Anyways,” Sam continued. “He sacrificed himself to stop her, and that was just the beginning of a whole other mess.”

You stood there staring blankly at you beer bottle, frozen in your thoughts. Time traveling grandparents and demons. Resurrected parents. Secret hunters club. Fucking Wizard of Oz’s Dorothy, all things that were real and happened to them. You shook yourself out of your thoughts and finished your beer in a long gulp. 

“Well,” you clicked with your tongue as you pulled the empty bottle away from your lips. “I think you two would definitely be institutionalized if you ever admitted these things to other people.”

“Yeah, being honest usually gets us committed for a few days,” Sam laughed. You gave him a perplexed glare but shook it off instead of asking further questions. The clock behind him displaying the time that could not have possibly been right, making you jump to find your phone.

“Fuck what time is it?” you groaned while moving items out of your way in the search for it.

“It’s a little bit before 5,” Sam informed while looking at his watch.

“God damn time change,” you grunted. “Look, listen guys as much as I would love to sit here and have girl talk, I have less than two hours to get ready for a stupid faculty ball at the University. I also have no idea where half of the things I need are.”

“We can help you find them,” Sam offered, glancing over at his brother that looked lost in his thoughts.

“You really don’t…” you started to reply.

“We would be more than happy to,” Dean added, stopping you from speaking.

“Fine,” you breathed as you rolled your eyes and glanced at the boxes still full of miscellaneous contents behind him. “I need my curling iron, makeup, jewelry and black Manolo Blahnik’s.”

“What is a Manolo Blahnik?” Sam questioned in confusion.

“They’re high heeled shoes,” Dean informed while moving towards the living room. He turned himself back around once reaching an unopened box, meeting Sam and yours surprised stares. “What?”

“Nothing,” you scoffed as you walked past him to another box.

“So what exactly is this thing you are going to?” Sam asked while moving to his own spot amongst the stacks. 

“Basically a meet and greet amongst faculty members,” you answered while pulling away at the tape, revealing yet another box of books in front of you.

“Want some company,” Sam suggested. You gave him a puzzled look, questioning is motivations. “I mean being the new kid and not knowing anyone, might help to have friendly faces.”

You let out a short laugh, imagining yourself walking in with two handsome men head to toe in plaid and denim. “Unless you guys have a tux handy, I don’t think so.”

“I do,” Dean nonchalantly said while rummaging through his boxes contents of beauty products. 

“You do?” Sam and you questioned together in amazement.

“God how many bath beads and bombs do you have?”

________________________________________________________

“A lot. Now answer the question Dean,” Y/N commanded while folding her arms in front of her waiting for him to reply.

“What? So I have a tux in the car. You never know when you might need it for a case,” he answered while pulling out her curling iron from the bottom of the box. “One down.”

“And how often do you need a tux for a case?” she giggled while lifting and fumbling with another box to stifle through.

“You would be surprised,” he laughed, grabbing the box in Y/N’s hands to help her balance it. His eyes met hers in the motion as she mouthed a “thank you” that made his heart skip a beat. Just one look and he felt like a teenager again, sweaty and anxious about the future. What would ever become of this? Did she even feel something for him? Was he just wasting his time here?

That night, that amazing night that he found himself lying next to her, watching her chest rise and fall as she dreamed was one of the best moments he had in a long time. During the drive to her he played around with the thought of if things weren’t so complicated, for lack of a better word, he could see himself doing it every night. Just being with her. Hell, maybe the civilian life in a little house that he could escape the world with her in. 

While he pulled up to her house, he couldn’t help but smile at how it looked exactly as he imagined. The perfect spot for the perfect apple pie life. His smile fading as he remembered nothing about his life would ever be perfect. Not in this lifetime at least. The question of what the hell he was even trying to do or going to do shook up his nerves. He was actually grateful that Sam had been there or else he would have probably tucked in his tail and ran back home before even seeing her face again. 

She hadn’t been as spirited from the other night, maybe she had regretted everything that had happened. That thought made Dean sick to his stomach as he helped unpack the endless stacks of books. How drunk had she been? Did he take advantage of her? Oh God, did she want to gut him right where he stood? The worst possible thought flooded his mind until Sam snapped him out of it. The picture he held in his hands was so familiar like he had already seen it. When Sam spoke up he knew what he was looking at. Home. No place like it. 

His brother was looking to him for answers the same way he had all his life, only this time he didn’t have them. He knew what had to happen next, he had to find out what she knew. The world he wanted to keep away from her was breaking through. Her eyes searched for the details within her memories that only made the sickness in his stomach grow. His world had already met hers, and not only that his mother had brought it to her. As Sam and he spoke, he watched her carefully as she followed their words. Her eyes were searching for reason when she as questioned how it was her that she had brought it to her. A long story he did not want to talk about because the ending still frightened him. His mother could still be alive with Jack by her side in a world he may never be able to reach again. 

As a familiar name hit his ears his heart sank. Charlie. Although he had just seen her face in another world, it was not the real Charlie he had cared for, the one he was unable to protect. He could feel his heart beating faster as Y/N grabbed a book and shown his brother her past, one that included the bright smile on his friends face that he knew all too well as it still flashed in his memories. He felt his emotions burning inside of him, begging to come out when she told him to turn the pages. There they were, more of the family he had let down all those years ago. Ash, Ellen, and sweet Jo, the girl who sacrificed herself for him. His heart was now tearing into pieces.

A worn letter fell into his hands as he sat remembering, feeling the guilt that he tried to push back. Ash had sent her to them. If he had only known he would have found her one way or another if anything to honor his fallen friends' wishes for them to protect her. As he spoke he could see the anger inside of her push itself out as her words hit like acid. Out of instinct, he fought against them as his anger toward himself grew. He watched her face as his muscles tightened to attack her, she wasn’t scared. He saw it in her eyes, her anger still burning and seeing in his that he was as well. She could see it how it still haunted him, his past mistakes. The emotions in her eyes shifted as she watched him. She was still angry, but somehow she could read that he was too and she understood. Understood how the memories would keep him up at night, how given the job things happen to the ones you love, and how if he could take it all back, trading in his life for theirs he would. 

He watched her walk away with Sam following, a tear escaping down his cheek. How would she be able to forgive him when he could never forgive himself? He let out a deep sigh before following them. The subject already had changed as she asked more of her questions. Somehow she was able to push all the words that were said aside and allow herself to pretend that everything was normal. Nothing was nor ever would be normal, not with him around. 

Her smile gave him a sense of calm as they all spoke. She really was perfect. If there had been any chance at something more, surely all that had transpired erased them. Following her gaze to the clock, Dean knew he was running out of time he had with her. Sam offering for them to accompany her was his last shot before he knew she might be gone from him again. When she suggested that it was not going to happen unless they had a tux Dean jumped at his chance. This was it and he was not going to miss it.

“So what time should I be ready for our date?” Dean smiled coyly setting the box down from her grasp.

“Really, I’ll be fine,” she laughed as she tore through the tape to find her other lost items.

“Nonsense,” Dean stated. “You might need someone to carry you home after being bored to sleep all night.”

He watched as she rolled her eyes and chuckled, muttering a “fine” in defeat. He could feel his heart starting to beat faster, this was it. It was happening, and not only that he wouldn’t have Sam to lean on. No, it would just be her and him. The possibility of redemption from the past fueled him to work faster, tearing through the boxes and finding everything she needed. 

“Thanks,” she said while taking them from his hands. “There is an iron underneath the bathroom sink if you need it for your suit.”

Dean nodded as he looked over at Sam who had a smile raising in the corner of his mouth. This was the chance for Dean to find what he wanted, hell what he needed. There was no way he would let anything mess it up.

Y/N had disappeared into what Dean could only assume was her bedroom. He heard the water from a shower run as he went to Baby’s trunk for everything that he would need. While grabbing the garment bag that held the tux he glanced at all the tools that laid organized in front of him. Knives, guns, holy water, bombs and a whole lot of other tools he would usually reach for when going into the unknown. He shook his head as he pushed the trunk back shut. There was no need for any of it, at least not tonight.

After fixing himself in her bathroom mirror after changing, he walked out to have an approving nod from his brother that was short lived as Sam’s eyes moved to what was behind Dean. He turned his head and saw her standing there in a long low cut black dress with her hair falling on her shoulders in curls. Their eyes met as they both whispered that same word in unison, “Jesus”.

“Wait what?” she asked.

“Nothing,” Dean quickly replied as he pulled out Baby’s keys. “You ready to go.”

“Ah ah, Winchester, I do believe I said the next time I was driving,” she smiled while jiggling her keys in her hand.

Dean gave a low laugh while smiling as he followed her outside. He would do anything she told him to do to see her smile and tonight he would do exactly that. Butterflies now fluttering inside of him as they reached her car. She walked to the driver’s side making Dean move quickly on his feet.

“You know, as the guy I should at least drive,” he suggested while opening the door for her.

“No chance in hell Winchester,” she laughed before seating herself in.

Closing the door gently before walking himself around to the other side he felt his smile only growing wider. Nothing was going to ruin tonight. He wouldn’t let it. Everything was just going to be…perfect.

Keep reading to part nine here

Tags: @jaylarkson @waywardbaby @snffbeebee @iamabeautifulperson18 @19agbrown

[marshmallow-the-vampire-slayer]

MTVS Epic Rewatch #161

BTVS 6x11 Gone

Stray thoughts

1) “Gone” is the trademark “Sarah takes a week off and she’s only in a few scenes” episode. Some of these may be memorable, albeit not necessarily good, mostly because they’re other-characters-centric (like Triangle, Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered or The Zeppo) Others are unquestionably bad, like season 4′s Where the Wild Things Are. And yet others fall somewhere in the middle on the quality scale, like The Killer in Me or Gone. As is the case with any Buffy episode, there are some memorable scenes and lines in this episode, and it does advance the plot, especially regarding Buffy’s and Willow’s season arcs. But as a whole, the episode kind of falls flat. 

2) Hm, what could the writers be possibly implying by this? Do they mean that magic... is like... I don’t know... a drug, or something? The underlying message is so difficult to read! Why won’t they spell it out for us?

DAWN: But they're just candles! BUFFY: Well, yeah, you know, to you and me they're just candles, but to... witches they're... like bongs.

3) I’m usually a hardcore Dawn defender, but she was acting really childish in the opening scene, throwing a tantrum because Buffy was getting rid of all the magic-related stuff in the house. She was 15 years old, and therefore old enough to understand the gravity of the situation. For Christ’s sake, she had almost died two nights ago because of Willow’s addiction, how could she not get it? I blame the writers for this, though. It was an OOC choice for Dawn, in my opinion. Moreover, they wrote her quite inconsistently in this episode: she’s complaining to Buffy in this first scene, but she’s talking to her normally as sisters do. It doesn’t look like she’s angry at Buffy, you know? And then the next morning she’s all silence-treatment and sullen and sassy? 

4) So... the trio actually built an invisibility ray, and we’re supposed to believe they would stay in Sunnydale to become supervillains instead of making millions off their inventions?

5) #buffyswiggivesmethewiggins

6) Buffy was definitely partly responsible for the events that led to Dawn’s getting hurt. She shouldn’t bear the brunt of the blame, though. Yet she does, because that’s who she is. She talks about being too wrapped in her own “dumb life” to notice Willow was going off the rails or to pay Dawn enough attention, but the thing is, there’s nothing dumb about what she was going through. There’s nothing dumb about suffering from depression and PTSD and needing to focus on yourself. How could she take care of anyone when she couldn’t/didn’t want to take care of herself? 

7) So, this is what Xander walked into...

If you think Buffy was being harassed, you’re not reading the room right, dude 

Also, I need to comment on something and I hope I get my message across right. And I ask you to bear with me. At least twice so far (the “footsie under the rubble” scene, and this one) Buffy had told Spike “no” or to “stop” while her body language suggested otherwise. That’s going to be their dynamics going forward. Buffy says no, but then Spike pushes her a little bit, and she gives in. Time and again, we’ll see different variations of this dynamic. It’s definitely an unhealthy dynamic, one I wouldn’t foster in any relationship. And the right thing to do each time Buffy had said “No” - even if she eventually didn’t really mean it - would have been to back off. But Spike was no gentleman. He might make us forget it sometimes, he might forget it himself quite frequently, but he was a vampire, evil by definition and lacking a moral compass. What happens in Seeing Red is in no way justified by this or their established dynamic, of course. It can’t be justified by anything. But what I’m trying to get to is how Spike’s psyche works and what led him to believe that if he just pushed a little bit more, she would eventually give in as she had done so many times before. The difference between the scene in Seeing Red and all the previous instances before it, a difference that Spike failed to notice because he’s not wired that way and which makes ALL the difference in the world, is that both Buffy’s words and her body language were screaming “No.” There weren’t any half-assed attempts at pushing him away, there weren’t any come-hither “stops” or “nos”. She meant it that time, and that’s all that matters. 

8) Spike is ticked when Buffy won’t introduce him even as a friend, but the moment Buffy tells him the lady was from Social Services, he immediately tries to put in a good word for her, and it’s kinda sweet. Although he ends up mucking it up, but at least he tried.

BUFFY: Spike... this nice woman is from Social Services? SPIKE: Oh, right! Uh... hey! Buffy's a great mom. She takes good care of her little sis. Like, when Dawn was hanging out too much in my crypt, Buffy put a right stop to it. MS. KROGER: I'm sorry, did you say- BUFFY: Crib! He said crib. You know kids today and their buggin' street slang.

And he calls her “mom”, which I love.

9) ICONIC I

MS. KROGER: Oh, so you live with another woman. BUFFY: Oh! Oh, it's not a, a gay thing, you know, I mean, well... she's gay, but, but we don't... gay.

10) ICONIC II

Although, isn’t all weed magic weed by definition?

11) Basically, the social service lady’s visit is an everything-than-can-wrong-will-go-wrong nightmare come true. 

12) See 7) above...

BUFFY: Why won't you go? SPIKE: I just thought you'd want... BUFFY: Get out of here!

And not only has she kept his lighter, but she’s carrying it around on her...

13) And then Buffy goes all Felicity on her hair (damn I really want to rewatch Felicity! Felicity and Ben forever!)

14) I do love the season 1 reference!

XANDER: Buffy, how did this hap... wait a sec, have you been feeling... ignored lately? INVISIBLE BUFFY: Yeah, ignored. I wish. No, this isn't a Marcie deal.

15) Oh, after talking about this, this scene really feels like the writers were writing the on-set drama into the story! Like Anya wanting to get a haircut just like Buffy’s mirrors Emma wanting to get a haircut just like Sarah’s...

ANYA: You cut your hair? INVISIBLE BUFFY: Oh, yeah! ANYA: Really? How short? INVISIBLE BUFFY: Um, about up to here... well, if you could see my hand, it's kind of above my shoulders. ANYA: Ahh, that sounds so adorable! I was thinking about getting my hair cut before the wed...

16) Buffy basically uses her invisibility to do the silliest, pettiest things, for real. On the one hand, one would think that’s very un-Buffy-like. On the other hand, that’s what any human being would do in her shoes, at least in the moments right after gaining this superpower. Plus, she needed some mindless fun. And it’s pretty much what she did in Earshot, so it’s definitely in-character.

So, here’s a recount of what she did as Invisible Buffy...

1. Channel Lilly Kane as a fashion ghost...

2. Stealing a police cart while crying  “ So long, copper!”, therefore channeling Spike, Ripper or both.

3. Fucking with the social services lady in the most annoying ways.

17) I appreciate the reversal of roles the writers did with Buffy/Willow. During the last episode, we’d seen Willow crash and burn and Buffy trying to be the mature one (emphasis on “trying”.) Now, Buffy’s out of control and Willow’s the one trying to rise above the situation by going back to basics. I’ve given Willow a lot of flack for her behavior up until now, but I really love her in this episode. She’s honestly trying, she gets shit done the old-fashioned way, and she overcomes the temptation to use magic. That’s the Willow I love.

18) And then, there’s this scene...

...let’s call it for what it is: dubious consent. Okay?

19) Oh, this statement is going to become a lie so soon...

WARREN: The Slayer got slammed with a big-ass dose of radiation when the gun overloaded. Her cells are mutating at an accelerated rate. Eventually her molecular makeup will start losing its integrity and then ... pfft. ANDREW: But, wouldn't that kill her? WARREN: Well, lemme think. Yeah! JONATHAN: Wait a minute! We're not killing anybody. Especially not Buffy! WARREN: You guys are so immature! We're villains! When are you gonna get that through your thick skulls? JONATHAN: We're not killers, we're crime lords!

20) ICONIC III

So... Xander has just told Spike Buffy’s invisible, and he’s caught Spike having invisible sex, and yet he can’t put two and two together? Plus, she was gasping and moaning and the freaking ear was moving all on its own!! How thick can you be?!

21) I mean, magic withdrawal aside, we can all relate to this moment...

22) It’s only after Buffy meets Dawn and she freaks out about her sister being invisible that Buffy understands this shouldn’t be a laughing matter...

DAWN: Buffy? Where are you? INVISIBLE BUFFY: I'm invisible. Check this out. Wooo, wooo! Unidentified flying pizza, comin' in for a landing.

DAWN: W-what are you talking- INVISIBLE BUFFY: Okay, not the most clever ad lib, but come on! Points for spontaneity. DAWN: Stop it! Just... stop.  INVISIBLE BUFFY: Sorry Dawn. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to freak you out. DAWN: Well, what did you think would happen? You're freaking invisible, Buffy. INVISIBLE BUFFY: I know. Xander and Anya are working on it. Muldering out what happened.  DAWN: Well, what about you? Shouldn't you be working on it? INVISIBLE BUFFY: Of course I- DAWN: Do you even care about, about who did this to you, or, or if you're gonna be stuck this way? You're making jokes and flying pizzas. INVISIBLE BUFFY: I don't think that's- DAWN:  I can't talk to you like this. I can't see you! How can I talk to you if I can't see you?

23) And Willow solves the case with some good old-fashioned sleuthing and I love her for it!

Of course, she gets kidnapped in the process, but what can you do? You win some, you lose some.

24) And yet again, she figures out they’re trying to kill Buffy with some good old-fashioned science knowledge!

25) Tucker’s brother :)

BUFFY: Who are you?

ANDREW: Andrew. I summoned the flying monkeys that attacked the high school? During the school play, you know?

WARREN: It's Tucker's brother. JONATHAN: Yeah, it's Tucker's brother.

26) This might be my favorite moment in the episode.

BUFFY: Pretty neat, you finding the van. So... how did you manage to... do it exactly? I mean, to locate it? WILLOW: The hard way. The spell-free way. The oh-my-god-my-head's-gonna-fall-off, my-feet-are-killing-me way. I don't know how I got through this day.

BUFFY: Well, the important thing is that you did. It's a... good first step. WILLOW: How are you doing, post-invisibleness? BUFFY: Okay. I still have to do some damage control from my giddy-fest. Dawn was pretty freaked out. The whole taking-a-vacation-from-me thing didn't work out so well. WILLOW: Tell me about it. BUFFY: Except... when I got Xander's message... you know, that I was... fading away... I actually got scared. WILLOW: Well, yeah. Who wouldn't? BUFFY: Me. I wouldn't. Not too long ago I probably would have welcomed it. But I realized... I'm not saying that I'm doing back-flips about my life, but...  I didn't... I don't... wanna die. That's something, right? WILLOW: It's something.

I love the fact that they’re there for each other and that they’re the ones pulling each other through their shit. And they’re quite honest about where they’re at - even if they still have secrets. Both of the made it through the day, and sometimes that’s the biggest accomplishment of them all. 

[onlyfools-fall-foryou]

my long overdue skam appreciation post 👏👏👏

Skam is such an amazing show. The filming is so unique (somehow subtly giving a different feel than anything I’ve ever seen. not too cliche, not too offsetting) and the colors are (subtly but intensely) pretty, and I love the mix between texts and real situations they alternate onscreen. the angles they filmed it really gets me too, like when the characters are lying together, you can see what’s going on and their interactions from all the angles they film it at. 

this post will be heavily spoilery. i’m gonna start of with seasons 1 and 2. those two seasons are so raw and real, especially eva’s season, we can all relate to her and what she feels when she’s alone in the school yard, personally I related to Eva a lot because my parents are rarely home and I have to do everything for myself and my brother. I’m not as lonely as her when I’m home because I have my brother, but I guess his company is the equivalent of eva’s friends like the squad and jonas, isak who are over often.

they put little details out of the camera’s focus (in season 3, at the start of episode 5, you can see even’s arm behind isak and i thought that was someone walking in but realized it was even stroking isak *squeal* and the gigantic hickey at the back of even’s neck in epi 8).

the music is timed perfectly, mixed with a bit of humour. in season 1, after eva finds out about isak, the music kicks in with ‘jealousy’ and I thought that was really freaking perfect. (not to mention the ‘i wanna fuck you’ of season 2.) i love how they cut music off abruptly with cues like the door closing, it really signifies the change of the character’s mood and emotional state, and the song choices are spot on. 

In season 3, there’s a lot of romeo and juliet 1996 songs. I love romeo and juliet and i loved that season 3 was heavily indulgent with elements from it (like the pool make out, songs, that eye contact they have in episode 2). it makes me very happy.

i love how they treat the major/minor and minor/minor characters. the major/minor characters in season 2 and 3 would be eskild and linn, and in 1 it would be someone like ingrid. also did anyone else notice magnus in season 1 because i saw him a couple times when i was watching it again like when vilde comes to the party and passes out magnus rushes to help her etc. for the next two seasons, we don’t see a lot of ingrid and sara, but they’re still there dancing at parties or there on school grounds. i love the fact that they keep them barely in attention (does that line make any sense lol), other shows don’t really care to do that with their minor/minor characters. whenever there’s a party scene (end of s2, start of s3) i rewatch again and again to see that little bits of ingrid, iben, etc. linn and eskild having fun at the end of s2 makes my life. (also, ingrid and iben are really beautiful. (as minor characters.) just wanted to put that out there.)

they really have details that are unnoticeable and noticeable at the same time. and the acting and chemistry is so superb, and it’s real. not only with the romantic partners, but with friends like the boys’ gang and the girls’ gang and eskild/linn/isak, eskild/linn/noora, what really got to me this season was isak texting eskild that everything was fucked and eskild just responding with jeg kommer, i’m coming. just that. not to mention the way the squad is there for every one of them consistently. everyone taking noora to the police and standing behind her while she gives her statement, sana comforting vilde while she nervously talks to the kosegruppa, jonas, magnus, mahdi actually caring and constantly asking about even, the girls cleaning vilde up and making her breakfast in season 1. i don’t know if i’ll ever get friends/people that genuinely care for me, and their relationships are beautiful.

it’s unbelievably (compared to other shows) real, like, we’ve all taken the am i gay? test and taken advice from reddit. the way they actually use things we actually use like instagram, facebook, texting etc makes it more real and the way they treat these sensitive subjects delicately without tiptoeing around it is just amazing. 

not to mention it being humorous and witty, like when magnus breaks the fourth wall and gives a shoutout to nrk, when isak and even get caught in the pool, eva pushing jonas off the bed and jonas flipping her off when her mom gets home, these are just a couple humourous bits that were particularly memorable to me but there are so many more.

in the end, my favorite part about it is that it relies on the audience to be smart enough. a lot of movies that i recently saw did not do this (cough fantastic beasts cough). maybe it’s because i’ve spent countless hours watching things and now i can predict everything, but most movies tend to feed me little bits of information at a time or give me just enough that it won’t be boring, but skam gives me a lot of information and trusts us to follow along, idk. to think about it, skam’s story isn’t that complicated, is it? but i somehow feel like there’s so much more information and story than what is presented, maybe it’s because it’s so emotionally charged or maybe because it’s packed full with metaphors and references (bible, romeo + juliet, even talking about sonja’s “aluminum leg” being a metaphor to his bipolar disorder), but it feels like a lot and the writers do a beautiful job of giving us the right amount of information.

(last bit, i love that when they wake up it actually looks like they’ve been sleeping)

3 words to describe it: raw, real, relatable.

[wishingfornever]

2/4/2018 – No Contact:  I forgot to name this and I’d rather not reread this crap

So… Yesterday, I worked 8 to 12.  Came back��� fell asleep.  Then I caught a stream.  Wasn’t productive.  It wasn’t that bad. Current time, 12:09.  Late, yeah?  Or early.

I’ve been catching up on Archer.  Or, rather, rewatching the series since the day before yesterday.  Really shouldn’t considering I have to watch it on normal speed… and Netflix doesn’t have the latest season.  Like, seriously, Netflix is nothing but inconveniences.  -,-

Regardless, I often wonder what character people would say I relate with.  Archer himself would be the obvious choice.  Thick, black hair, tall, charming, but also a terrible asshole that people kind of hate but tolerate.  Maybe?  I don’t know.  Oh, he’s something of a mama’s boy.

Dennis used to call me that.  He knew it got on my nerves.  His sister did too.  I let them, though.  Maybe I shouldn’t have?  I mean, Dennis was quick to talk about how offended and personal things were.  Something of a dramatic, I suppose…

Eh. Bad time to bring up Dennis.  I’m trying to work my way to Pam.

I don’t think I relate with Pam that much but she is one of my favorite characters.  She is… perhaps designed to be disgusting but she’s also very strong.  Not just physically, though that’s been shown but her character as well.  At times, at least.  This has been inconsistent now that I think about it.  Still, while getting tortured she just spits in their eyes and tells them they’d better just kill her.

Bold, to be sure.

Again, I like strong female characters.  Though, Pam is more humorous than strong.  And, of course, strong female characters tend to confuse strong with getting the shit kicked out of them.  Anyone can have the shit kicked out of them.  That doesn’t make them strong, it just breaks their ribs.

Rather, a good strong character doesn’t need to take a spot on the battlefield and fight alongside men.  No.  Rather, they need to be somewhat assertive and confident.  Like a queen leading a nation while invaded on several fronts.  Standing strong and leading. That’d be fine.

A strong male character doesn’t have to have a machinegun and mow down other men by the hundreds.  Action heroes will be less remembered than actual strong male characters.  Someone who is assertive, confident, and ready to take charge.

Of course, I do also like physically strong women.  Not so strong they’re more muscly than I could ever achieve but just someone who won’t get pushed over.  Ariel, for example.  Kickboxer, a bit shorter than me, and quick to defend what she loves.  She’s fierce in her own way.

Thinking about Dennis again.  Talking about strong male characters, I thought about examples (despite not listing them).  One Piece, an anime he loves came up.  Something I dislike about One Piece is that EVERYONE has a tragic backstory.  Fucking… no.  God no.  That’s dumb. Tragic doesn’t mean good.  You can have a good and compelling backstory that isn’t tragic.

Anyways, one of the characters had big lips.  I used to drink a lot of soda and that’s pretty unhealthy.  Made my lips swell a bit.  They were also kind of bright.  Dennis used to say I had “big nigger lips” which was actually his words.  I want to say he doesn’t hate black people.  I would say, “He’s not racist” but everyone is a little racist.  He probably said that for shock humor because that’s what I’m usually about.  Still, that made me self-conscious.  If you manage to find a picture of me, take notice.  If I’m not smiling with exposed teeth, then I’m biting my lip or tucking it into my mouth.  That’s how you can tell I knew a picture of me was being taken.

The reason I bite my lip is so I feel more confident.  I find myself with big lips rather unattractive.

Oof… this isn’t supposed to be the post where I shit on Dennis.  :/

He’s a Patriots fan.  Which is dumb.  Fucking bandwagon if I’ve ever seen it.  Or maybe there is another reason, I’m not sure.  They’re going to the superbowl.  I hate it.  I read somewhere that apparently, they league allowed the Patriots to go there again?  I’m not sure if that’s true or not but I’ve basically finished watching football.  I don’t have the time for it anyways.

Whatever. Talking about Archer.  Not talking about Dennis again.

Archer and I also both love cats and love Dodge cars.  Nice to see.  Small things.  Of course, he’s fit and I’m not.  I weighed myself yesterday… 249.  I knew I gained.  My mom… weakened my discipline maybe.  Spent so much money on FUCKING food.  And pizza was shit from yesterday, not sure I mentioned that?  Disappointing.  Like, legitimately tired of Pizza Hut.  I’ll stop getting Pizza Hut when I FINALLY have my free large pizza.  -,-

Of which, I thought I was closer than I really was to get it.  Fucking bullshit.

I’m going to have to really focus.  Get back on track.  My aunt is coming and she doesn’t speak english.  Sometime this month.  Fucking hell… I really don’t want to have to deal with my aunt, really.  I don’t want to deal with anyone.  The only thing stopping me from achieving what I need is myself.  However, the thought of other people tends to make me… hesitate.

I’m watching the episode where Archer gets a car for his birthday.  I’d love to get a Challenger, too…  I hope I can afford one someday but I doubt it.  I’d have to write a lot of books just to get a used Toyota.  I can dream.

During the Stream I was asked to write a poem.  The streamer, his name is NGParadox, lost his campaign.  I wrote something sort of for that. It was more specific… people loved it but I didn’t think it was very good.  That’s life, though.  I’m sharing it with Ariel.  I share almost all my poetry with her.

I promised my cousin that I’d drink Kambucha or whatever the fuck it’s called.  Both bottles.

Lol, fucking Archer.  “What year do you think this is?”  “Yeah, good question.”  That’s third wall breaking stuff right there.  It’s set in the 60’s 70’s and even 80’s with anachronistic details. They never specifically address when this is all taking place.  And for those who don’t know, anachronistic means incorrect to the time.  Meaning they have the internet and cellphones in the 1800’s for example.  You’ll see it a lot in depictions of historical events.

That said, I like how Archer has a sort of repetitive humor.  Like, all the characters are working off some hivemind or whatever.  I’ve always thought that was funny because it tends to begin with a character saying something that they’d normally say.  Then it follows by a character that won’t normally say it but wouldn’t be opposed to saying it.  Then it’s followed by a character that won’t say it at all normally.  Usually not in the same episode but not always.  I think that’s pretty funny, myself.

Oh, that reminds me.  Somehow.  Easter eggs!

No, not thinking about Easter but sometimes the show does fun easter eggs like that third wall joke (sort of, doubt it’d qualify though because it might fly over the head of someone who doesn’t pay attention). Most people know but an easter egg in the context that I’m using it is just a fun little joke that you have to look out for, usually in media.  I’m bringing this up because at work there are easter eggs. Where are they?

In the products.  Here me out.

There are these window curtains that are for sale.  There are a variety of styles, each with their own names.  One such name is “O’Hara” which is the surname of the main character Scarlett O’Hara.  She eventually becomes so poor she has to make a dress out of a window curtain to appear still well to do.  That’s a fun little touch.

Better yet, while stocking lipstick I discovered yesterday that one lipstick wasn’t called “Lustful Red” or “Tasteful Nude.”  Rather, it was called “What’s up, Doc?” which is a reference to Bugs Bunny because he’s always dressing up as a woman and putting on lipstick.  That is by far the best thing I have ever seen.

So, I want to start paying attention.  There are certainly bound to be more fun easter eggs like that.  Just gotta pay attention, is all.

I’m thinking…  I know the year Archer takes place.  Or at least, I know what year it can’t take place before.  The answer:  1974.  The reason for this answer is because all the Russian assault rifles you see are AK-47’s which were later replaced by the AK-74.  They fire different rounds and have different magazines.

The M16 is also available so it takes place between 1964-1974.  Of course, how accurate this is is hard to say.  Clearly the cell phone is a thing and that wasn’t invented until later.  However, that’s a specific anachronistic detail to more liken it to modern day.

Doing research for my nationstate is great… of which, I’ve neglected it as of late.  Gotta work on it a bit… rewrite a lot of lore.

Oh, KGB guy said he was working for the KGB for 30 years.  That’d place the time of the show at 1984 if he began the year the KGB started.

Oh, there is a picture in the background of the same episode of perhaps one of the crew members behind archer atop an image showing off the Soviet dress uniform at the time.  I remember in high school, I pasted my face over that same image for computer class.  It’s edited a bit, though.

Reusing character assets.  The waiter at the Chinese restaurant is the same character and voice actor as the original pirate captain.  Oh, and the face on the vacuum cleaner is an actress who shows up in a later season.

Next episode is in Space.  Walter helped me out while researching a lot on this one because my shitty cuba ripoff is Spacefaring and super technologically advanced.  White space suits are because it’s to keep radiation out or something?  Darker colors would be bad for the wearer which sucks because I wanted to do blue, which is my nation’s color (as is the color of every nation ever).  One thing to do is to have it be reflective so it’d keep out the radiation that way.  So, if I do a dark color it’d have to look somewhat cheap because it’d use reflective crap.  Neat stuff, right?

There’s more he told me.  He’s super into science.  I took some notes that were deleted a while back, but whatever.  Desalination plants have to be a thing in my country due to it being small island nation that’s grossly overpopulated.  Basically Taiwan.

So, Archer seems to have a very close relationship with anyone who has green eyes.  Weird things to notice.  Except for Krieger of course.

Episodes later, they mention a T-72.  So, that means the minimum year Archer takes place is in 1973 when it started service.  :D

Or, an easier way to determine the year Archer takes place in is to just figure out when Archer was born.  Then determine his age in the first season.  As time passes in the show, you can determine the year of the season.  Of course, there are bound to be inconsistencies.  We’d have to see to be sure.

One such inconsistency is that it’s 5:30 and just seeing it has made me incredibly sleepy.  D’oh!  Guess I’ll go to sleep now.  Talk to you… well, I want to say when I wake up but I’m not certain anymore.  Ta!

Found out my aunt is coming on the 17th.  I have 13 days.  Need to clean up.  Last night, I stayed up doing exercises while occasionally stopping to comment about Archer.

Oh… It would appear the Patriots lost…

HA!!! Fucking suck it.  I hate the Patriots and their fans are tools. >:C

Getting close to tomorrow…  Six hour stream today.  Long.  So long.  Oof. Ah, well.  Part of the fun, I guess.  Something I’ve been doing is taking steps on stairs two by two.  Usually, I walk up each individual step like a normal person… Esther encouraged me to try doing two by two.  She did.  And now I’m doing it.  I don’t know why I didn’t before…  I’m surprised, really.  I don’t know what concerned me before.

Thinking about Esther… last Superbowl, the Patriots won.  I was with Esther then.  She laughed because she won a bet.  I apparently got so drunk that I blacked out.  Then we had mind blowing sex apparently.  I wish I were there for it.  That’s actually the first time she spoke to Dennis.  He was being a dick to me and I handed him off to her.  She sassed him right back and it confused him SO badly.  It was pretty funny, actually…  I miss Esther.  Can you tell?

Things you remember…  Or don’t remember.  It was a weird night, I think afterwards I was talking to someone who wasn’t there?  That scared Esther… but again, it was after the sex.  I really should get back into drinking again.  I miss talking to people on my days off… people with voices…

Oh, I was sick yesterday.  Not sure if I mentioned.  Sore throat, nothing drastic.  Day before too.  And today, I’ve been blowing out tons of mucus.  It’s passing, maybe, but my nose is still super clogged.  I chopped up an onion today.  I’m getting back to my original diet. I feel like I’ll have the discipline to say no to sweets and ultra fattening foods again.  I’ve been wanting to get this summer sausage SO badly but I haven’t… it’s really good.  But it’s meat, so… sad face. :c

Still, the fact that my impulsiveness HASN’T made me even heavier than I thought I’d be is surprising.  I’ve been doing more arm exercises and realized that I’ve gotten so weak, as I mentioned.  I can’t believe I thought I could outstrength Dennis… but again, that wasn’t the plan.  The plan was to not fight and just show Dennis for something that he isn’t.  He’s not confrontational, I doubt he’d ever hit me.  Mostly because he’d be afraid that I’d hit back.

I used to be super strong.  Like, so strong that it’s crazy.  Now?  I can’t lift my weights to the side.  They only get so far.  I’m so disappointed… my shoulders are going to get a work out.  I’ll just dick around and watch Archer as I play with my weights.  I NEED to get my strength back.  Not so I can fight Dennis but so I have some confidence again.

Besides, if I intend to lose weight and enlist, I’m going to need to do a minimum amount of pullups and situps and all that crap.  So, I need to be sure I can do at least some of that.  I don’t want to be in Adela’s house forever.  I don’t want to be in this country forever.