#reminds me of that tweet abt friends who complain about doing things for friends or expecting low maintenence

[gothicrosary]

holy crap people on here have some of the least nuanced most basic bland takes i have ever seen in my LIFE 

[ackerfics]

slow dance with you — mikasa ackerman

— goth!mikasa ackerman x soft!female reader (modern au)

— warnings: slight mention of alcohol, pure rotten fluff

— summary:  after gaining some courage from the drinks she had in the party and from the advice she got from her friends, mikasa is ready to become your girlfriend.

— word count: 3.9k

— author’s notes: i would like to thank the anon who gave me some ideas for goth!mikasa, you are so amazing !! thank you for the small headcanons. and since we’re on the topic of writing abt goth!mikasa, i couldn’t help but pair her up with a classic soft girl who likes to wear pink at every time of the day. this dynamic is based on marceline and princess bubblegum so i hope you enjoy !!

p.s. the reader will have dyed hair here, if this is not your cup of tea, just let this fly by your dash.

listen to this while reading.

“She dyed her hair pink,” came a dazed yet mesmerized tone.

“You’re staring at her again.”

Mikasa jumped on her seat at Eren’s nonchalant observation. She whipped her head to her best friend, his attention directed on his laptop, hands flying across the keyboard as he typed out the next few words in his essay. Noticing the incredulous look the black-haired girl was shooting him, Eren rose an eyebrow before rolling his eyes. Mikasa huffed, crossing her eyes with a subtle hue of red on her cheeks, complimenting her dark lipstick. “I am not staring,” she mumbled. “Shut up, Eren.” She looked away from her subject of interest but continued shooting small glances.

Eren sighed, running his hand through his hair. He was always one of the witnesses of his best friend slash sister being meek around her crush. At first, he was teasing her because not going to lie, Mikasa’s crush is a pretty person but as their years in college made them juniors, Eren will be the reckless idiot that he is (courtesy of Armin) and set Mikasa up. But he liked to live his life out first — Mikasa will probably curse him with that spellbook she bought from the antique bookshop they encountered in their little exploration back when they were first-years. “Mikasa, why don’t you take the chance and confess to her? It’s not going to be the end of the world.”

“If she rejects me? What then?”

“Then that’s the next problem that you will have to face.” The brown-haired boy turned back to his essay. He stared at his laptop screen blankly before spewing out curses. “Now, I forgot what to write next! Damn it.” He picked up his iced coffee and drank from the metal straw as his life depended on it.

Mikasa rolled her eyes at her best friend’s first statement. “Gee, thanks for the advice. It was very much appreciated.”

“Glad to be of help.”

There was a thud on their table that made the two look up from their respective activities. Eren had a scowl on his face because for the nth time this day, he was interrupted from finishing his essay (for fuck’s sake, he doesn’t want to fail Ackerman’s class). Mikasa blinked from scrolling through her crush’s Twitter account (the last post she wrote was about how Levi Ackerman, Mikasa’s relative and everyone’s Anthropology professor) and fixed her attention on their blonde friend, Armin. He looked too bright after a round of morning classes, something that Eren doesn’t comprehend. The blue-eyed young man has always been the rational and genius third of their little group. There wasn’t a time where Armin’s advice got a situation to erupt in flames. It was either the situation became an inferno instead (Eren) or nobody had the guts to do it (Mikasa).

“Hey, guys!” Armin greeted, arranging his side of the table, meticulously placing each component of his lunch in front of him. “How were your morning classes?”

“Shit,” Eren spat out.

“Of course, it is.”

“They were alright,” Mikasa shrugged.

“Figured.” Armin glanced at his friend’s sides of the table, nodding at Mikasa’s balanced lunch while blankly staring at Eren’s laptop. The device should’ve been a good tray of lunch. “I thought you were eating lunch, Eren? That’s what you said in your text.”

“Can’t,” the brown-haired boy huffed. He gestured at his iced coffee without taking his eyes off the laptop. “I guess, this counts as my lunch.”

“When’s that essay due?”

“In about,” Eren looked at the time on his laptop, “three hours. Ackerman is my first period later. That fucking terror professor has no mercy when it comes to this. Can he just piss off for once? Mikasa, do you even tell him to get laid? Because I think that would solve his attitude. I swear to God, he’s getting more pissed every damn day.”

“Wow, I guess getting my short, grumpy, middle-aged uncle to start his sex life will be a nice conversation starter,” Mikasa drawled, half-lidded, bored eyes reading every tweet her crush has posted for the entire week. Mikasa couldn’t help but smile at one post about a new movie her crush just watched, saying that it was now a new favorite. She was tempted to give a heart on every single post but that would it weird because they never followed each other despite the small interactions they shared in between classes. With a sigh, she looked up, only to be met with Eren’s unamused stare. Raising an eyebrow, she asked, “What? Do you think that would work, Eren? Levi is probably a virgin his whole life and will continue his record until he’s all shriveled up.” Eren blanched at the image. “Just finish your homework and stop complaining.”

“I’m trying!”

“You’re not trying hard enough, that’s for sure. If you just started that essay the day he assigned it to your class, you would have finished it way before the deadline.”

Eren pointed at Mikasa with narrowed eyes. “Don’t even go there, Mikasa. I have a life aside from being a sleep-deprived college student.”

“I mean, she’s got a point, Eren.” Armin immediately rose his hands in defense when Eren shifted his glare from the black-haired young woman to him. “You always tend to procrastinate in the most impeccable timing that we sometimes have to remind you of your backlogs. And now, here you are, doing things last minute when you could’ve prevented the rush by doing it immediately.”

“Thanks for slapping the reality to my face, you two,” Eren dryly replied, going back to his essay for the final time. “And by the way, Armin, give Mikasa some solid advice that she will finally follow because she’s making googly eyes at Miss Pretty two tables from us a couple of minutes before you arrived. You know, the love of her life?”

Armin roamed his eyes in the lunch hall and sure enough, there was Mikasa’s goddess sitting with her group of friends. There was that brown-haired girl that was dubbed as the Potato Girl for eating mashed potatoes during Ackerman’s class (the professor told the class his rules of no eating or going out of the room while he’s discussing the moment the girl took a spoonful of her snack). A young man with a buzz cut snorting at what the brown-haired girl said. Armin remembered sharing a class with him. He never got the chance to introduce himself because the young man was sleeping throughout the lecture. There was usually a fourth person in the little group but it seems like he was running late or already in his class. That person was Eren’s sworn frenemy, the reason for that relationship was unknown to this day.

The three people at the table all stood up, the brown-haired girl and the taller young man leading the way. Armin instantly had an idea.

“Hey, [Name]!”

Mikasa nearly had whiplash from turning her head to Armin. “Armin?!” she hissed under her breath, face becoming hotter when you looked at their table, a bright smile lighting up your face. You called your friends, telling them to go on ahead without you, to which they nodded before walking towards the trio’s table. Her brain wasn’t processing the moment you lifted a hand to wave at whoever you were smiling at. Mikasa wished it was her. “Fuck,” she whispered, registering how cute you look. You donned a salmon pink plaid sundress and a white cardigan, matching with the bubblegum pink locks you let down. Her heart was hammering a thousand miles per second and there was no hope of stopping it.

“Hi, Armin,” you replied, stopping a few feet from Mikasa, who looked away from you to fix her wide-eyed stare on her empty plate.

“I was just going to ask if you already have a partner in our Molecular Biology lab?” The blue-eyed young man then turned to Mikasa and Eren. “I’m in the same class as her this year.”

“As if calling her here wasn’t that obvious,” Eren murmured, still typing out his essay.

“I don’t need your dry remarks right now, Eren, don’t want to ruin the atmosphere. So, [Name], you have a partner?”

You shook your head. “I think not. It would be great if we could be partners though. I need a break from the people I’ve been partnered with throughout college.”

He gave you a sympathetic smile. It was true, though. Most of the grouping during your first years of college were all set up by the teachers so the students really had no say on the matter at hand. Even Armin was exposed to a variety of students, most of them being too slacking to participate or too overbearing with their suggestions that they have no plans of doing. He nodded with a smile, “I’ll be sending an email to Professor Zoe about this and we’re done.” He glanced behind you, noticing that your two friends weren’t there anymore. “I’m sorry for holding you up. I’m pretty sure you have a class after lunch. See you around?”

You waved him off. “It’s fine, I told them to go ahead since Sasha has a class scheduled right after lunch and Connie had to nap in his dorm. And I don’t have any class the whole afternoon, except for an online session so yeah, see you around, Armin.” You acknowledge Eren with a nod, to which he responded with a cool expression (as if his mind wasn’t a mess from the cramming), and gave a soft smile to Mikasa, “Bye, Mikasa.” And you were off to your dorm, leaving behind two amused men and an awestruck Mikasa.

The black-haired young woman was hyperventilating the moment you disappeared from the lunch hall, hands clenched on top of her black shorts. She regretted wearing a thin, long-sleeved striped sweater under her black shirt because it was so fucking hot after that encounter. Her entire body was vibrating with too many emotions all at once, short-circuiting until she became a heap of flustered mess in front of her best friends. “Oh, my God,” she muttered like a prayer. She definitely needed one after seeing you all pretty in pink. It was too much for her soul because you two are a perfect match this time. Her grommet belt and choker were not helping because she couldn’t fucking breathe.

“Mikasa, breathe,” Armin reminded beside her. “Yeah, that’s it.”

Once she regained her composure, Mikasa realized she probably looked like a gaping fish. “Oh, my God! I’m so sure that this time, she thinks I’m weird. My name is the only one she mentioned aside from Armin which is saying something because she’s classmates with him. But why did she say goodbye to me? Oh, my God, she’s giving me so many butterflies right now.”

“Your gay is showing,” Eren pointed out calmly.

“Eren, not the time,” Armin murmured, hovering his hands over Mikasa’s back.

“Just wanted to alleviate the tense atmosphere. No need to get so worked up.”

“But, Mikasa, your feelings for her are showing.”

Eren clapped his hands, pointing a finger at Armin. “That, my friend, is a genius observation.”

Ignoring the green-eyed man, Armin continued, “I think it’s time you confess to her. Three years is a pretty long time pining for a person. In the end, her knowing your feelings will be inevitable. That is if you have no plans in letting her know.”

“Of course, I want her to know,” Mikasa murmured, fiddling with the sleeves of her striped long-sleeves.

“I heard that there’s a party this Saturday in Reiner’s frat,” Eren told them, meeting both of his friends’ eyes over the top of his laptop screen. “We’re in the same football team with Jean. The horseface is a friend of your girl,” he nodded at Mikasa, who erupted in a sputter of her crush not being her girl, “okay, not your girl — yet. As I was saying, [Name] is good friends with Jean and if Jean is there, Miss Pretty in Pink will be, too. That’s your chance to ask her out, Mikasa.” He met the blinking gray eyes of his best friend. “The question is, are you up for that?”

-

“You were staring at her so hard at lunch again.”

You looked up from your book to acknowledge Sasha entering your dorm room after a whole afternoon of packed lectures. The brown-haired young woman was so tired that she immediately plopped on top of her bed on the other side of the room. At first, you didn’t register what she said because you were preoccupied with your book. You chose to indulge the night in a good book because it has been a long time since you’ve done that. With furrowed eyebrows, you asked, “Can you repeat what you said, Sasha?”

Sasha tilted her head to look at you with one eye uncovered by her duvet. Her hair fluttered after puffing out a breath of disbelief. “Oh, don’t pretend that you have no idea, Miss Pretty in Pink.”

“That’s because I didn’t catch what you said,” you replied, gesturing at your novel. “And what’s with that Miss Pretty in Pink nickname? Did some of the students around campus started that?”

“Sort of,” Sasha hummed. She sat up from her bed and took out her phone from her backpack lying on the floor. You watched the whole time she stretched her arm without changing her position on her bed. With her phone in hand, she opened her Twitter account. “Actually, a friend of mine tweeted it, wait, I’m just going to scroll through my Likes tab to find her tweet. Oh, here it is.” Sasha showed you her screen, patiently waiting for you to take the device from her hand to get a closer look. Her hopeful smile turned into a small pout when you made no moves in doing so. “Take my phone and see for yourself.”

You sighed, following her pleas. “It’s probably just someone from the volleyball team. You know how some of them never stopped following me around campus. Can’t they take the hint that they’re not my type?”

“This person is much better than those himbo simps following you around. She’s an amazing person behind that shy exterior of hers.”

You only hummed, blankly staring at your roommate’s phone before your eyes widened in realization. Your eyes skimmed over and over again at the handle, mkackerman, beside the display picture of a short-haired girl in pigtails. It was the girl that managed to capture your attention during your first year at Eldia University. The girl with an air of mystique that the stars are jealous of. You always admired her from afar, appreciating her style each day. But your admiration was getting replaced with something more at the five words she tweeted. 

You’re so pretty in pink.

Roses bloomed in your cheeks, complimenting your pink hair the longer you gawked at her short post. 

“What?” you breathed out after a full minute of silence.

“Mm-hmm,” Sasha hummed with a smug smile. “And who dyed her hair pink impulsively last weekend?” She intentionally looked at you with sharp eyes, her smile turning into a smirk full of mischief. In actuality, Sasha knew of Mikasa’s crush on you since they were acquainted with each other. It was an embarrassing first meeting between the two, with Sasha latching on a random person’s arm in the station and it turned out to be Mikasa. The two became great friends after that, well, after Mikasa lowered her guard down, leaving her pocket knife safely tucked underneath her checkered skirt. It was Sasha who managed to make Mikasa confess of her undying love for you, the former squealing her heart out in the library. (They were kicked out after that.) 

“I don’t know,” you denied. “There could be a couple of people in the campus who thought that spontaneously dyeing their hair pink is an awesome idea.” You threw your hands in the air, giving back Sasha her phone right after.

“Trust me. Mikasa doesn’t have any interest in any other girl other than a special someone I know.”

You chose to ignore her, turning back on the discarded book on top of your covers. The words flew around your mind, aggravating you until you placed the novel on your lap. A defeated sigh came out of your lips. “Okay, let’s go out for some dinner.” You stretched, switching your pajama bottoms for a pair of loose jeans, and leaving your button-down pajama top on. The people in public will never know your top is a part of a pajama set. As you ducked down to roll the bottom of your jeans, you hear Sasha’s bed shuffling. Sitting up, you regarded her with an inquisitive raise of an eyebrow. “Spill it.”

“Oh, alright. Jean told me to bring you to a party.”

You stood up, patting your lap of imaginary dust, placing your things and book inside your tote bag. “Tell him no. I have a written exam coming up and I don’t want to fail one of my majors. He can manage without one person in our friendship group.”

Sasha huffed, mimicking your actions. “This will be the last time!”

“You said that the previous party you pulled me to.” You narrowed your eyes at her. “I couldn’t get up for a whole day because of that party. Don’t forget your wallet.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Sasha threw her wallet in her small bag, throwing the strap over her shoulder. “I promise that this will be the last time, I’ll even call Connie for the witness of my pact!” She placed a heartfelt palm over her chest, lifting her chin a little in the air. “I solemnly swear I am … keeping my promise.”

“You hesitated.”

The brown-haired girl giggled sheepishly, scratching the back of her neck. “It’s kind of hard not to continue the quote from Harry Potter. You can’t blame me for that!”

“I’ll think about it, okay?”

“You better because Mikasa will be there.”

You blinked at her statement. “What does this have to do with her?”

Your roommate looped her arm with yours, pulling you in the direction of the elevators. “Because,” it sounded like she was talking to a child, “you were staring at her earlier during lunch period. I understand that because Mikasa looks so good every second of the day but there was something different about the way you’re staring at her.” She tapped her finger on her chin. “Let me see, there’s some pizzaz there.”

“The pizzaz you’re talking about is me admiring her make-up — nothing more.”

“Whatever you say,” came Sasha’s sing-song voice. “I will be the first one who will say ‘I told you so’ to your face when you two start dating.”

-

The night of the party was not as bizarre as you thought.

Sure, there were people having shots in the living room but there weren’t any extreme scenarios lying around unlike some of the parties Connie and Jean went to. It was mostly catching up with old friends or making connections with strangers by ranting about the education system of your university. All in all, it was a fun night, yet here you are, holding your cup of beer with two hands as you craned your neck to get a glimpse of Sasha. Your roommate disappeared as you turned to get a shot, leaving a confused you behind. To think you specifically asked Sasha to be by your side throughout the night. You cursed in your head, you being reliant on the presence of others surfacing. Your stress made you tip your head back, downing your drink in a go.

Without anything to do, you leaned back on the wall. Mind hazy, eyes glassy, you searched the living room for a spunky brown-haired girl that you were supposed to be buddies with. Instead of Sasha, you met gazes with a girl with stars for her eyes. She was equally mesmerized as she was staring straight at you. Everything became silent as your heartbeat resonated with hers. She was beautiful in her all-black outfit — a leather pencil skirt over fishnet stockings, cropped tank top, and combat boots. The two of you are contrasting with one another; her lipstick so dark whilst yours shone a pretty coral, her hair framing her face in a midnight pixie cut whilst yours were in pink waves cascading down, her entire appearance blending in the background whilst you were a beacon with your coordinating soft outfit. 

God damn it, Sasha was right.

You are definitely falling in love with Mikasa Ackerman.

Mikasa who you saw reading tarot cards of her blonde friend. Mikasa who you bumped into during the opening ceremony two years ago. Mikasa who you discovered to have an affinity for electric guitars when you stumbled in one of the auditoriums, her department’s band having an audition. Mikasa who never meets your gaze because you make her nervous at how effortless you carry yourself. 

But tonight, she never looked away from you, her eyes having an adoring yet determined shine.

She stopped in front of you, mere inches separating you two. You looked up at her, her combat boots making her taller than she already is. You saw her eyes flick to your lips, your breath hitching at the thought of having her dark lipstick on any part of your body. With a careful tilt of her head, Mikasa ducked her head a little to fully meet your eyes face to face. “I saw you’re alone,” her voice is still soft-spoken as if she was afraid that she was scaring you. It might be because of the liquid and verbal courage she got from drinking and listening to her best friends because Mikasa had no plans of letting you go tonight. “I thought you needed company.”

A breath came out of your lips, your proximity making Mikasa feel it. “Uhm, if it’s you, I don’t see why not?”

A large smile brightened Mikasa’s face before it dimmed as she lowered her gaze to your lips once more. “I’ve been waiting three years for this.”

Maybe your mind was too hazy with alcohol or it could be because you accepted your feelings for the black-haired girl, so you whispered, lips brushing against hers in the most addicting way possible, “Just kiss me, Mikasa.”

Her lips softly moved against yours in a slow dance, the inches separating you disappearing as Mikasa wrapped an arm around your waist. You lift a hand to cup her jaw, tilting your head to deepen the kiss and to brush your tongue with hers. You felt her shiver, biting your lower lip to make you open up more, with your whimpers tingling her hearing. Mikasa pulled away, trailing firm kisses on the skin where your shoulder meets your neck. Seeing the black kiss mark on your skin, she smiled and placed fluttering kisses on your neck up to your cheek. Opening your eyes, the silver grays in front of you have never been so beautiful. You returned the favor of placing kiss marks. You stood on your tiptoes, feeling Mikasa’s hand steadying you, and left a coral pink mark on the corner of her mouth. 

Mikasa dipped her head, placing her lips close to your ear.

“I want to slow dance with you,” she sung to your ear. “I know all the other boys are tough and smooth and I got the blues. I want to slow dance with you.” Mikasa hid a small smile at your flustered expression. “So can I be your vampire queen, Bonnie?”

The moment you said yes, there was a shout in the crowds. “Hell yeah, your plan worked, Eren, Armin!”

You and Mikasa stared at each other with wide eyes before laughing. 

“Let’s go ditch this party.”

“Thought you’d never ask, Bonnie.”

[gh0st-patr0l]

Okay. Alright. I wasn’t gonna talk abt this, but apparently this is a discussion that needs to be had. So Lets Have It.

I have a Big Fucking Problem with all this “cc!critical” stuff in general. And I’m just gonna say it straight up.

You Don’t Know These People.

You do not have a personal relationship with these content creators. You do not talk to them on a one-on-one basis. You do not know them.

So why the hell do you people think it’s your responsibility OR your place to judge them as a person?

Let’s look at what this person pointed out specifically!

First of all- yes, Karl IS ND and has confirmed that much. He’s mentioned having ADHD several times on stream and has tweeted clarifying that he’s officially diagnosed- I don’t have the tweet on hand but it Does exist, you can do your own research if you don’t believe me.

Building on top of Niki’s base. Let’s look at that situation:

They are on a survival minecraft server. Where Niki specifically made an underground base, without telling Anyone where it is. Where they are free to build and do what they want wherever.

Niki specifically stated publicly after the fact that she had no problem with Karl building on top of her base, and that it was funny and could pose some cool lore opportunities- proving that all of yall complaining about this not Only don’t actually listen to her or pay attention to her actual feelings or opinions on things and just want an excuse to get mad, but that you will specifically talk over her when her feelings don’t support your argument.

KARL AND NIKI ARE FRIENDS. They are Real Life Adults who are capable of talking to each other if they have problems with what they are doing. For someone who seems concerned with infantilizing people, you sure seem to have trouble with remembering that being an adult also means you can have agency and can speak for yourself

“Treating people on TFTSMP as if they are visibly less important”

I’m... not even sure where to start on this one? Where has he Ever gone out of his way to exclude someone or make them seem unimportant?

TFTSMP is a Group Improvisation Series. People come up with characters and roleplay. There is no line-to-line script. If people want to talk, they Can Talk. Sure, some people may be more shy or anxious! It Is Not Karl’s Responsibility To Put More Pressure Or Focus On Them, nor would that be good or productive of him to do! If your fave is in an episode and isn’t talking as much, it’s probably because They Don’t Want To, and that is in no way Karl’s doing???

I honestly REALLY want to see a specific example of him doing this because I cannot name One off the top of my head. Karl does his best in Tales to make sure everyone there has their time to shine if they Want to. If somebody doesn’t do as much, that’s because. They Didnt Want To Do As Much

And this is why I have a fucking problem with yall. Because you LOVE to remind us that Karl is an adult and is responsible for his actions and how he treats people!!!

But then... suddenly the rest of his friends are Incapable of voicing their opinions? Of settling personal conflicts? Of choosing to interact with people who they enjoy spending time with???

You cant pick and choose to address personal agency and responsibility when it suits you. If Eret, or Niki, or any of Karl’s friends have problems with him, they can fucking say so? Or better yet, address it in private? Like normal fucking people? Because this is what yall dont seem to get-

THEIR PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS ARE NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

Imagine you were walking down the street, and passed a group of people, and overheard their conversations. And you decided you didn’t like the way one of them talked to the others, so you inserted yourself into their conversation and went “HEY I DONT THINK YOU’RE A GOOD PERSON AND I DONT THINK YOU SHOULD BE FRIENDS BECAUSE THEY OBVIOUSLY TREAT YOU BADLY.”

How fucking weird would that be??? Is that not overstepping major boundaries and making assumptions about people you don’t know??? HOW IS THIS ANY DIFFERENT.

Any time Karl’s friends have ACTUALLY spoken about how he is as a friend or person, I have heard NOTHING but good things! His close friends- including Eret, Niki, and all the other people you LOVE to speak for and get mad about- have only ever spoken about him being kind, selfless, and a genuinely lovely person and friend. But you all seem to be absolutely Certain that what you see of him, from behind a screen, is somehow a much more accurate picture of who he is as a person, and think you know better than the people who are actually friends with him.

When I made that post, I wasn’t saying that you can’t make any judgement about him without being ableist. Frankly, the fact that you assumed that was what I was saying says a LOT about you, but I’m not gonna touch on that.

What I was saying was that a lot of the time, when people say they’re being ���CC critical”, they’re not actually being critical of anything Karl does as a content creator. They don’t talk about his streaming, his writing, or his directing. What they talk about is the way he talks, the way he acts, and stuff that is heavily influenced by his ADHD. What I have a problem with is that people completely misuse the term “criticism”.

Because giving feedback on how somebody makes content is one thing. But when you’re complaining about how he talks, how he acts with his friends, or how he lives his life, that’s not “criticism”, that’s just fucking judging someone that you don’t know.

I’m not saying you have to like Karl. But don’t try to make it look like you have some moral high ground, speak over other CCs, or make it seem like you’re somehow conducting some social justice when what you’re really doing is complaining about a person living their life. Just say you don’t like him and move on, because I promise, you are not doing Anything else.

[trickstarbrave]

today in reasons i feel shitty: my friend blew up on me on twitter bc i kept ASKING him if he wanted to play dnd with us bc hes a part of our group. i asked him if he could LAST WEDNESDAY and he has been giving me the run around since then. saying “i dont know yet” and “ill tell you when i do”. i tell him to let us know sunday at least, because the only days off he has are monday and tuesday. he says okay

sunday evening comes and he hasnt said shit so i ask him. hes drunk and i tell him we’ll talk tomorrow. monday i ask him if he can play tomorrow and he says hes “not sure and will need to ask if theyre playing mtg” so i say “okay”. he doesnt reply back all day. TODAY i ask him if he wants to play today or not and he says “i have to pick up a court summons” (not, “actually sorry i am playing mtg today”, not “i dont feel like playing, im sorry”). i sound suspicious but say “okay” and remind him we havent played in over a week AS IS. and he then GOES OFF ON ME for “guilt tripping him” and “making it an ~obligation~ he plays” and how i “stress him out by asking over and over again”. when i tell him he should have told me straight out he didnt want to play instead of just giving vague “maybe i dont know” answers he gets defensive even more and says “I DID” and when i say “no, you didnt, the only thing vaguely like that is you saying “im gonna be tired” on a question about your days off. thats not a yes or no answer and lots of us play while tired so why would i assume it was something else” 

“WELL ITS NOT MY FAULT YOURE A BUNCH OF SADISTS WHO HAD TO TURN A FUN CASUAL GAME INTO A OBLIGATION WHERE YOU ALL ARE FORCED TO PLAY SICK OR TIRED! i cant even SAY i dont want to play because you all guilt trip me and get mad when i do.” 

see, he doesnt say “sorry guys my next days off will be full and im not up to it.” and apologize for keeping us waiting or giving us the go ahead to play without him (WEVE HAD THIS DISCUSSION BEFORE and PURPOSEFULLY made the game so if he doesnt want to play he can leave whenever so long as its not in the middle of a fucking mission. okay. its not like we just sit there doing nothing but complain if he cant play). he waits until the DAY OF OUR GAME to tell is he purposefully made plans on game night, no he cant change them, no he was absolutely always forced to do them right now during game time, and then get pissy when we all complain because we dont even have time to plan around him and have cleared out our evening for nothing and our time is wasted. 

he then keeps going on and on because apparently i was just supposed to know the words “im tired” and his vague answers like hes genuinely unsure about the state of tomorrow were him “actually” telling me he doesnt even want to play and i should have fucking caught on, he wanted to quit this game MONTHS ago. i was just supposed to know him being ‘busy’ was a ‘secret message’ that actually meant ‘just stop even asking me when i want to play a game and hang out with my friends! just stop inviting me in general! i dont like you or the game! its not fun and stresses me out and im LYING to you.” and we just all fucking ignore him and play without him and let him figure out we havent even been giving him the opportunity to join to play

which is so fucking. terrible. who would just assume “thats what you mean”???? like imagine if you WERENT doing this and actually were really busy and your friends just eventually stopped even inviting you to game night, only for you to check the group chat months later and find out they have been playing without you and having fun and didnt even bother inviting you to anything at all. you just find this out. and by the time you figure it out they might have done a lot stuff or played games YOU wanted to play and they arent going to go back and replay the stuff you missed bc they just assumed you were lying to their faces and it wouldnt matter anyways if you were there or not. how hurtful would that be? imagine if some of your friends did that to you, would you be HAPPY they did it??? 

keep in mind HE is the one who picked out the VERY NEXT MISSION WE”RE ABOUT TO DO so fucking sorry if we assumed “HEY HE PROBABLY WANTS TO PLAY IT. YKNOW THE MISSION HE FUCKING PICKED OUT. THE MISSION INVOLVING STUFF SPECIFICALLY FOR HIS CHARACTER” oh my fucking god. 

now i dont know the state of our group bc he yelled at me more and said he quit and deleted all his tweets and our dm is miserable and put the game on hiatus for 2 fucking weeks. i feel miserable too bc my friend has been lying to me and called me a guilt tripper and manipulative for reminding him hes stringing along 5 other people by not being fucking honest with us and said its OUR PROBLEM he cant be honest even though we structured the game so he can take MONTH long breaks if he needs to just give us the heads up. i told him he could quit once we got more than 3 players bc do you know how annoying it is to do a full campaign w only 2 characters playing???? bc one of the three dropped out??? i told him to just fucking play until then and he could quit for real and he went “but i DO wanna play : ( im just stressed!” 

well now ill just fucking believe every time he complains abt smth like “man i have to spend money on this thing” that means we’re just not hanging out like we planned. im not gonna ask him if hes actually going to the ren fest even tho the bed situation was taken care of bc i just assume now that he only brought up the bed to tell me hes not fucking going and to fuck off. im not making a costume for it either if my best friend doesnt go im just gonna stay home. 

i cant read the fucking air and he knows this. hes known me forever. he knows im ignorant and dont ‘get’ stuff like “if someone keeps canceling plans that means they want you to leave them the fuck alone and stop even inviting them or talking to them”. he knows im probably autistic and struggle with ‘unsaid” social cues like that and he just STILL does this and calls ME terrible for not ‘getting it’ and ‘forcing him’ to yell at me. im rtired.

[thepolyesterprince-blog]

REPOST,   DON’T REBLOG !

IM GONNA SET THIS IN MY MODERN CANON ADAPTION (so modern radio verse) AND I JUST WANNA SAY, BC I KNOW IT’S NOT ON HERE AS A QUESTION

HERB IS A REDDIT TROLL

HE’S TROLLIN’ THE TROLLS THAT TROLL TROLLS ON REDDIT

J U S T S A Y I N ‘

SOCIAL  MEDIA .

TWITTER  NAME :  PROBABLY @bigherb BC HES TERRIBLE (that’s probably taken and he’d just do a keyboard smash on the numbers to make it unique while threatening the life of whoever has it) NUMBER  OF  FOLLOWERS  ON  TWITTER : .... PROBABLY UNDER 50 LOL WHAT  DO  THEY  POST  ABOUT ?: REALLY AWFUL THINGS. like. it’s probably all just complaining tbh ??? all problematic views and complaining about how sensitive kids are these day and blah blah and PROBABLY REALLY NOT OKAY POLITICS TBH but if you dig far enough down in there you’ll find O N E tweet that’s @ lucille’s twitter that he posted on their aniversary that just says mth silly like “i love you lots gorgeous” or smth and WHY AM I GOIN OFF ABT THIS STOP ME FACEBOOK  NAME : Herbert Ruggles Tarlek the Second (BECAUSE LIKE I SAID HE’S TERRIBLE) NUMBER  OF  FACEBOOK  FRIENDS : HE’S PROBABLY ADDED EVERY CLIENT HE’S EVER HAD SO LIKE.. . OVER 1K PROBABLY also he won’t actually just add hot girls bc he feels a lil bad abt it and he’s not sure why so instead he accepts the ones from those like, bots with almost topless girls as the profile pic HE KNOWS THEY’RE NOT REAL BUT THAT’S THE POINT, IT’S JUST FOR LOOKS............................ WHAT  DO  THEY  POST  ABOUT ?:  basically the same as his twitter but worse, ALSO HE’S SUCH A DAD ON FACEBOOK, i would hate his FB page if i saw it, just saying, but redeemable qualitues include content regarding his children (CUTE LIL VIDEOS OF BUNNY & HERB THE THIRD STAB ME) INSTAGRAM  NAME :  U KNOW WHAT I BET HE ALSO MAKES THIS ONE @BIGHERB BUT HIS KEYBOARD SLAM FROM TWITTER IS T A K E N AND HES SOO MAD ABT IT he probably send whoever has that one hate mail for weeks NUMBER OF INSTAGRAM FOLLOWERS: LIKE MAYBE 40 SMTH??? WHAT  KIND  OF  PICTURES  DO  THEY  UPLOAD ?: HIS INSTA IS A TERRIBLE PLACE MADE TO MAKE HIM LOOK COOL which uncludes picures of him in front of expensive cars he does not own that are cropped just so you cant tell it’s on a lot and just generally AN ARRANGED LIFESTYLE LOL and also his face is in 89% of the pictures bc he’s vain and a prick SNAPCHAT :  tarlekchats TYPE  OF  PICTURES  THEY  UPLOAD  ON  MY  STORY :  his snapchat is probably just for his friends, like all his other social media he;s TRYINNA BE AWESOME AND COOL AND DRAW ATTN TO HIMSELF SMH but his snapchat is just given to ppl he deems friends and its like, personal stuff thats actually real, like lil videos of the kids or pictures documenting his day with mildly funny (if sometimes problematic) captions that are usually v salty (but u can sorta tell hes kinda kidding) TYPE  OF  PICTURES  THEY  UPLOAD  DIRECTLY  AT  PEOPLE : i don’t imagine he does this often but he probably will send something to his closest friends sometimes, probably pictures of like, something really ugly and the caption is just “it’s you” OR on the rare occasion of genuiness he’ll just send something to someone if it reminded him of them

MOBILE .

TYPE  OF  PHONE  THEY  OWN :  ITS ABSOLUTELY AN IPHONE, ITS THE NEWEST ONE, HE THINKS OWNING AN IPHONE MAKES HIM COOL AND BETTER THAN ANYONE WITHOUT AN IPHONE AND HALF HIS REDDIT TROLL BATTLES ARE AGAINST THOSE “ANDROID FANBOYS” AND PROVING WHY HE’S BETTER FOR HAVING AN IPHONE IM GONNA KILL HIM, 5  LATEST  PEOPLE  THAT  CALLED  HIM :  a client, lucille, a client, mr. carlson, andy WHO  WERE  THEIR  LAST  5  MISSED  CALLS  FROM : THEY’RE ALL FROM LES AND THERE MIGHT BE ONE FROM HIS DAD that he couldnt bring himself to answer bc even though he felt he SHOULD want to he didnt bc he wasnt in the mood to convince himself they have a healthy relationship bc it was like rly late bc his dads inconsiderate of timezones ?? IM GONNA SHUT UP ABT THAT NOW CUZ IT MADE ME SAD LOL LATEST  TEXT  AND  WHO  FROM : ��"Can I see you in my office in five? I’m calling a meeting!” - Mr. Carlson LATEST  PICTURE  THEY  TEXTED : PROBABLY A PICTURE OF LIKE, A THING IN A STORE TO LUCILLE LIKE “is this the thing you want me to buy” BC HES C L U E L E S S and he hates grocery shopping LATEST  VIDEO  THEY  TEXTED : I RLY DONT KNOW TBH OML i dont even think he knows u can do that HES LUCKY TO TEXT PICTURES TYPE  OF  PICTURES  ON  THEIR  PHONES : MOSTLY PROBABLY THE KIDS AND LUCILE AND LIKE..... JENNIFER LOL. but he almost nver takes pictures w his phone tbh TYPE  OF  VIDEOS  ON  THEIR  PHONE : HE NEVER RLY TAKES VIDEOS OML if he did it would like be of him grilling smth bc he thinks hes Cool ANYTHING  ON  THEIR  PHONE  THEY  DON’T  WANT  PEOPLE  TO  SEE :  PROBABLY,  there’s candy crush and he makes fun of ppl who play it but he’s secretly addicted AND NO ONE CAN KNOW also there’s probably at least one inappropriate photo that was for lucille JUST SAYIN 5  MOST  USED  APPS :  reddit, browser, CANDY CRUSH (and/or angry birds tbh), A MIRROR APP, twitter WHO  THEY  CALL  MOST  OFTEN :  ITS PROBABLY LUCILLE, ASIDE FROM VARIOUS CLIENTS WHO  THEY  TEXT  MOST  OFTEN : ANDY OR BAILEY not bc he wants to but bc they’re the most Hip of his friends and they text him (and everyone else) a lot LATEST  VOICE  MESSAGE  AND  WHO  IT’S  FROM : “Herb, I know you’re hiding from Mr. Carlson, but it won’t work. I know where you are, and I want you at my desk now.” -Jennifer WEBSITES  THEY  VISIT  MOST  OFTEN : REDDIT, youtube, and ??? maybe a cheat site for candy crush LOL BACKGROUND  PICTURE  ON  THEIR  PHONE :  ITS PROBABLY A SERIES OF BROADWAY ACTRESSES, NOT BC THEY’RE HOT BUT BC HE’S A FAN OF THEIRS, BUT IT ALSO SERVES AS LOOK MY LOCKSCREEN IS WOMEN THAT ARENT MY WIFE” orrrrr ITS A PICTURE OF BUNNY

TAGGED  BY : @piper-aileen-lenox (THANK YOUUU MY DEAR OML)

TAGGING : @innocentmanwithabounty @iwillmakemystandhere @themostpowerfuleditor @annastrxng @detectiverickitubbs @deu5exmach1na IDK EVERYONE I KNOW WAS TAGGED LOL but IF U WERENT FEEL FREE TO SAY I DID AND DO IT