#remembering my childhood dream of being 'guardian of the garden' as i had put it

[rainbluealoekitten]

well you *could* try to connect with nature via meditation, orrr you could start noticing that every single day, several roly polies are dying in this one specific part of the garden, so you make it a daily routine to move those alive, as well as bury the dead, to the point that one day you open the backdoor and there are four roly polies simply waiting for you. right there. somehow this feels a little intentional

[namjhyun]

Hospital Playlist | Winter Garden

*SEASON 01 SPOILERS ALERT*

Remember you can find all the Hospital Playlist reviews/analysis filed in “hospital playlist reviews” tag at the end of the post.

It would be very difficult to talk about Jung-won without mentioning Gyeo-wool and vice versa. Their respective journeys have been intertwined from the very beginning and in ways we didn’t even know until the end of the first season of Hospital Playlist. Theirs turned out to be a symbiotic relationship. So, I decided to dedicate a full review to them.

Jung-won’s life was one of the first mysteries in Hospital Playlist. The drama introduced his character little by little and almost always thorough other characters to give us an idea of the kind of person he is. So, when it was revealed that he is the youngest son of the CEO of Yulje Foundation and Hospital, we already got the general idea that he was a dedicated and hardworking doctor, with a very particular (and hilarious) family situation that put him in the spot to take over his father’s place. And that he didn’t want that position at all.

Still, it’s pretty obvious Jung-won has a head for business. You can tell by the proposal he presented to Chairman Ju in the first episode when he transferred his family’s hospital stocks to him. In exchange he got lofty jobs for his friends and himself, and even complete control over the money coming from the VIP ward in the hospital. This is a man that clearly thinks several steps ahead. A man that goes the distance. A marathoner.

Right after his father’s funeral (in March) and finally free of the pressure of having to run his family’s foundation, Jung-won put that determination into achieving his childhood dream of becoming a priest.

Enter Jang Gyeo-wool.

When we were first introduced to Gyeo-wool, I remember thinking she was the opposite of Jung-won. While she was presented as blunt and aloof, he was tactful and a bleeding heart. Because of this I always believed the two actually made a good team and that they could learn from each other.

Now that the first season is over, I think that was Writer Lee and PD Shin’s purpose all along: to make the viewers connect the two, at least in a professional light at first, so that we would eventually start picking up subtle hints that something else might be going on between them.

Of course, Hospital Playlist exceeded my expectations because things started to be not so subtle pretty fast. For me it really was when Jung-won said that Gyeo-wool wasn’t his “cup of tea” that I started to think about them in terms of a possible loveline. But it was the scene of the maggots that really solidify it and I told everyone “He likes her”. Not for one minute I thought Jung-won was going to go through with his priesthood plans after that.

Soon, Jung-won’s good deed of helping his friends get better jobs backfired on him spectacularly: Lee Ik-jun, MD and Certified Cupid, was trying to find ways to win Jang Gyeo-wool’s favor in order to get her assistance in the OR. And since Hospital Playlist spent the entire first season letting us know that Ik-jun always knows what’s up, naturally he realized Gyeo-wool had feelings for Jung-won. And that they might not be unrequited.

The journey was slow paced and frustrating at times. With each episode it was more and more clear that Jung-won was going out of his way to keep Gyeo-wool at arm’s length. He was resolute to keep on track with his decision to become a priest and I commend him for it... but this is when his smoking became a sign that things wouldn’t be going his way. For someone who wants to be pure and closer to the Lord, that’s a pretty nasty habit. One that to me was always a sign of doubt. Bottomline, it’s a sign of his humanity. Another sign? His headaches. He was suddenly overthinking things and questioning himself.

I’m not saying Jung-won wasn’t sincere about becoming a priest but if he had wanted to do it, a man with his kind of determination, would have got up and leave. Instead, when he talked with the priest helping him with his journey to Italy, Jung-won kept pushing the date of his departure over and over again. Always prioritizing his patients. This is when I knew that priesthood was a dream idealized from childhood and I believe that in some place of his subconscious he was choosing this path in order to runaway from the pain of not being able to help all the people he wants to help. Fact is that at some point in his life he had fallen in love with his profession as pediatrics surgeon but his soft personality put him through much pain, specially with the most difficult cases. He had given up on hobbies like photography because he couldn’t stand to see the photos of patients he lost, and almost never took time off to do any of the sports he loves so much. When he did it was to support a cause like breast cancer.

My point is that I understand why Jung-won wanted to quit: he is overworked, stressed and tired of having to carry on his shoulders an understaffed pediatrics department. Add to all that he was also running the Daddy Long Legs program by himself, getting calls from hospitals all over the country, and that he was in a passive aggressive fight with his Mother that didn’t want him to become a priest. The only down time he was getting was when he played the drums with the band and went out with his friends. But even then we saw him get up and help the people running the restaurant. Yeah, he clearly couldn’t go on like that. Something needed to change.

His first move was to delegate the Daddy Long Legs program to Song-hwa. A wonderful idea and the first hint that he was up to something. Like I mentioned before: Jung-won thinks several steps ahead. And this was also around the time he had his heart to heart talk with Ik-jun. At this point of the story, it was clear to Jung-won that his feelings for Gyeo-wool were not going dispel and that spending time with her, watching her work through her hardships and getting to understand her, were only making him fall deeper in love with her.

In return, Gyeo-wool spent that time growing as a doctor, learning from Ik-jun and Jung-won on how to talk to patients and their guardians. Something none of the other doctors bother to teach her before because they all considered her competent enough due to her OR technique. She shed off some of her shyness and started to show her warmth, became bolder and more proactive to try to find ways to connect with people around her. She went from eating alone to always share a meal with other residents and/or Dr. Bong. She sassed Min-ha on her make up, kinda told off Jun-wan and behaved like a cutie pie around her honorary big brother Ik-jun. Gyeo-wool remained steadfast and composed through every professional and personal hardship, and her bluntness was no longer a weakness but a strength. I honestly believe that by watching Gyeo-wool in action, Jung-won learned a thing or two about perseverance and not running away but facing your troubles.

I also think Ik-jun didn’t tell Gyeo-wool about Jung-won’s feelings for her because he didn’t believe it was his place. Sure, he had his fun trying to get reactions out Jung-won and giving his support to Gyeo-wool but, at the end of the day, he knew it was Jung-won and Gyeo-wool the ones that needed to take matters into their hands and have a proper talk about their feelings.

When Mama Rosa witnessed that sweet, sweet, moment all the shippers were waiting for between Jung-won and Gyeo-wool, she saw her last hope. A last-minute Hail Mary. And while I think Mama Rosa put Gyeo-wool in a terrible position by asking her to stop Jung-won from becoming a priest, this was the first time Gyeo-wool got any indication that maybe her love could be successful. That her heart and instincts were in the right place. And despite the uncertainty that followed her through the entire first season, she went for it. Like the complementary sprinter she is to Jung-won’s marathoner. Watch out Usain Bolt.

What none of us knew by the time episode 12 started is that Jung-won had already made the decision to stay after the family of a patient thanked him for going the extra mile for their daughter. The past months of being able to have the 99ers as a support system at Yulje and having Gyeo-wool around to help him with his work, made him felt happiness and a new sense of fulfillment. For the first time in years, he was feeling the weight on his shoulders was lighter and his good friend Song-hwa could see it in his face. She knew all along he was in a crossroads about his profession. That scene in Song-hwa’s office was significant because it was the first time he voiced out his feelings and to his surprise, just like Ik-jun, Song-hwa knew all about his Lady Winter.

So, when Christmas arrived and Gyeo-wool finally musters up the strength to go to his office, everything comes together. Even though she thinks Mama Rosa is wrong about him having feelings for her or that she knows it’s not her place to interfere with his decision of becoming a priest, she still can’t let go of him. Meanwhile, he had decided weeks ago to stay at Yulje, in no small part because of her, and remained silent. He held back. Again! And fret over how, when or what to say - just like he did in front of the ER’s door- because he didn’t know how to start the conversation. Why? Because the fool himself put them in a strictly professional relationship by refusing to have any kind of interaction outside the cases they shared or the hospital.

But in that final scene at his office, Jung-won sees a vulnerable Gyeo-wool. Suddenly her emotional resilience is nowhere to be found and she is wide open for him to witness how much he has put her through over the past nine months. Even worse he realizes that she knew all along about his plans and said nothing. Gyeo-wool’s bravery makes him see himself for the coward he has been for the past three weeks. For the first time in the whole season, he stops overthinking, FINALLY does as his heart is telling him and jumps into action. Jung-won answers Gyeo-wool’s confession and request with tender affection, longing looks -that communicate he too has been struggling-, kisses and a hug. He didn’t need to say anything. Like Gyeo-wool taught him: actions speak louder than words.

[lunap95]

Sailor Moon Remake Manga - The Shitennou

Am I ever going to shut up about this? NEVER! So to make things quicker all of my headcanons are tagged with #sailormoonremakemanga just in case so you don’t get too lost. But let’s focus on the Shitennou:

First, I believe they will have a similar role as the inner senshi, they are the princes of their own continent but the royalty of Earth rules above them. Therefore, they have also spent their childhood with Endymion and grow together.

However, I do believe their relationship dynamics are very different. For starters, we never knew if there was a King or Queen of Earth as the only ruler we know is Prince Endymion. So what I imagine is that the king and queen died when he was so young, letting little time for little Endymion to develop a friendly relationship like Sereny and her guardians as he would have a lot more duties than the moon princess. With this I mean that while Serenity and the inners could take a day off because they had Queen Serenity, Endymion and the Shitennou couldn’t, so their relationship is not based on moments spent together but in a kind of royal loyalty.

The rulers dying young could also be a good reason for the Earth government to suggest hosting the moon ambassadors (Princess Serenity and the inners) in search for immortality or even a cure for some kind of hereditary disease.

Now as @kichimiangra said, it would be very interested if the Shitennou fell in love with the Inner Senshi, so we will have then Jadeite/Mars, Nephrite/Jupiter, Zoisite/Mercury and Kunzite/Venus. In the way I see these relationships going I believe the Shitennou will learn how to enjoy life a little bit more with them and also discover that they can protect Endymion out of love not out of duty.

Jadeite/Mars: I kind of see Jadeite as a person who always wants to prove they are good at something so I picture their first encounter with Mars practicing at the garden with his bow and Jadeite being next to her trying to beat her without success. From this point, they will probably argue a lot but also understand their thrive for improvement better than anyone.

Nephrite/Jupiter: I have to admit I kind of see Nephrite crushing over Jupiter soooo hard. Like imagine this strong lady who defeated all your soldiers alone and then offered you some desserts as an apology because she didn’t know you were in the middle of training. Nephrite would be all romantic giving her roses and chocolates but it will take Jupiter a bit of time before opening up to him.

Zoisite/Mercury: This pairing is probably the most “gentle one”. Mercury is probably the first one who doesn’t judge Zoisite for his mannerism and I see them having long debates about gender and stereotypes on the library while they take a hot chocolate and cuddle together.

Kunzite/Venus: Now this is fun, remember Venus had a curse? According to Sailor V, Adonis was a Venus soldier who worked at Prince Endymion’s army (refugee maybe?). So Venus and Kunzite obviously get on very well because they are both leaders but nothing else. But one day Adonis sees her at the palace and falls in love. Cue to him stalking Venus all the time until she gets mad and tells him to stop. Here it depends a little bit, it could be either Adonis leaves or takes his own life. But the point is that Venus later feels guilty that one night she and Kunzite meet in the hall and talk about how they always have to put duty first and their understanding makes them fall in love with each other.

All this turns sour when an “event” that I would explain when I do the Endymion/Serenity post happens and the ambassadors leave. The Shitennou feel a bit betrayed because the Inners left without saying anything. That and the growing tensions makes them more open to listen to Beryl when she starts the rebellion.

I imagine Kunzite and Nephrite staying by Endymion side even during the war but Jadeite and Zoisite would definitely join Beryl. Sadly the four of them would die and then resurrected under Metallia’s command. About this, probably only Jadeite remembers their past life even in the present.

THE PRESENT: I really enjoy the idea of defying fate that @kichimiangra said so I think the inners and the Shitennou will not end up together. For Mars, Jadeite completely betrayed her and his prince so that would a hard pass for her no matter what. Similar for Zoisite and Mercury. About Kunzite, I see Venus finally understanding she doesn’t need anyone to be happy and Kunzite discovering he is in love with Zoisite and Venus is just a good friend. For Nephrite and Jupiter it depends, I think they could still have a change in the present but Nephrite would have to work his ass to repay Makoto for all the evil stuff.

Do I think they should die at the end? Mmmm yes and no. I kind of think Jadeite will die at the end along with Beryl but the rest will probably just lose their memory and live a happy life. Or keep their memory but decide they don’t want to fight anymore. This will also help for the Dream Act because they could make a reappearance and help the senshi.

Next would be Endymion(Mamoru)/Serenity(Usagi)

[e9-425poetry]

Presenting My Values

The ticking of a broken clock is a disturbing sound. Not comforting as I sit before my laptop hoping to be struck by a sudden hit of inspiration that will help me complete an assignment due soon. The ticking is like a taunting that the time is passing and my kids will be expecting me momentarily but without the foresight of when. I will be interrupted several times and as a matter of fact even as I write this sentence my husband comes into the room to give me an update on the chaos beyond my bedroom door, then the chaos begins to enter as my toddler bursts in yelling “I found you!” and does a quaint little dance. I love her, and though she brings me chaos she always manages to dance her way into my soul and becomes the hit of inspiration needed in moments like this. Somehow, I will make this work. My husband scoops her out of the room and Bones, my tuxedo cat companion enters, my guardian. She senses when I am stressed and sometimes I resist her getting up in my face to sniff my mouth until I hear her message. She purrs and I interpret that to mean “chill the eff out” so I do, at least for a moment until she is satisfied my blood pressure has lowered enough for me to work again. She curls herself into a ball and I look over my notes for the assignment due at the end of this story:

10 Minute Presentation

· On your values

· How you came to your values

· And *most importantly* how you embody your values

Note: Be creative (e.g. paint, music, gardening, etc)

Right now those stars I put around “Most importantly” sting like daggers.

I close my eyes and rub my forehead like I do when I’m stressed. How am I going to tell them? How do I speak about my values when they are not yet sufficiently designed? It feels like holding an open house for a half-drawn blueprint. How do I explain how I came to them when, in actuality, I have been working on this assignment for months, maybe years, and it’s still a work in progress, I’m still a work in progress. It feels like having the changing room door pushed open as I’m in the process of undressing and being asked to walk the cat walk. I want to stretch my arm out and force the door back closed and yell out with an awkward half smile “I’m not ready!” How do I tell them about how I embody something when I have been disembodied? It feels like asking a ghost to show itself. Even if it wants to it is a ghost, its whole “thing” is that it doesn’t have a body. And don’t even get me started on the creativity piece, that is a part of me currently in hibernation. They are asking me to poke a bear and while it sounds scary it is in reality quite pointless. The bear is asleep and no matter what I do to try and wake it from it’s slumber it refuses to budge. Perhaps for my presentation I can ask the class to hold a séance to summon my values forward and breathe life into them. I chuckle at the thought – that’s creative, right? But then I think of the folks in my class who would likely disapprove. Whatever the case I’m something of an atheist, a “spiritual atheist”, a title I committed myself to last year after my demons began literally chasing me in my dreams. There is something out there, but it feels like something bigger than the gods I know, an undercurrent to reality, something greater than anything I could ever comprehend though I do try to tune into it from time to time in meditation. I digress.

The reality is I wouldn’t want to hold a séance, not because I identify as a spiritual atheist but because I fear nothing would reveal itself, or worse the skeletons of my past selves would come bursting out of the closet to haunt me. Since a séance is designed to bring back the dead and I have figuratively lived and died several times already, I suppose this would be the most likely scenario. It would be horrific but if I were open to it, an enlightening experience.

For example, if a séance were to raise a 17-year-old version of myself from the past to speak to what I value, I would say my boyfriend and my friends and not much else. If I were pressed, I might say partying, having fun, sex, and getting high. At the time, it felt like these were the only things keeping me alive, numbing myself from the childhood I had just survived.

But that is not worse than if a séance were to conjure my 11 year old self to life. “what do you value?” we might ask, hands bound in tightly wound fists or whatever you might motion if you were to hold a séance over Zoom. My response would vary depending on whether I was asked before or after the first time I figuratively died by trying to literally end my life. If it were before I would likely say, “Nothing”. The wounds from being bullied, neglected, exploited, and violated still too fresh and my soul still too young to understand what had happened. If it were the morning after I realized I was still alive I might say a little more than nothing, perhaps “that things will get better”. This was the first time I caught a glimpse of the under current to reality, as I left my bed that morning not with a feeling of knowing but with a subtle sense that for some reason I was meant to live. Life had whispered to me that day that somehow, I would find my way through this. Like it does as I write and rewrite this piece.

Only if a séance were to conjure me past the age of 22 would you begin to recognize me as I am today. My home, my children, my education began to emerge as values, but I was still quite numb. My authentic self began to emerge like a mummy thawing from the ice, however still mostly frozen. I may have stopped the drugs and alcohol at that age but I was still self harming and self centered. Hate is drug too and was my drug of choice at the time. Still, I loved myself enough to die another time, to shed the bruised and abused skin of my old life so that I would be closer to becoming my authentic self.

At 26 I thought I had risen to my true self. I had reached the pinnacle of what I had thought my life goals were. I had graduated from college as the top student in my class in a field that breathed passion into my soul. My creativity was at its height as I had just fallen in love with my future husband and love, though fleeting, is a powerful muse. I had gotten a job that paid twice as much as I had ever made in my lives before. I had learned to find the breadcrumbs of life and follow them, unsure of where they would take me but sure that I was where I was supposed to be. Like Alice in Wonderland, but not on drugs, where instead of rabbits and hatters my intuition would lead me to people and places and meals and love.

Yet I died again, but unlike in the times prior this wasn’t a choice of mine, I didn’t want to shed another life but like a rosebush meeting another autumn my petals fell to the ground without my consent, this is me now. Both dead and alive, like a pile of twigs sticking out from the snowy ground waiting for spring to bring me back to life. Twigs that mourn the petals they lost and hope and even sometimes pray they will come back. To some of the petals I say good riddance to but some were parts of me I didn’t even know I was capable of losing. I loved to write and I loved to read but now the English language feels like a pet who ran away from home only for me to find it on the street and not to be recognized and I can barely remember its name.

Something’s changed this time around. I have seen the next spring and have seen the budding joy and peace, spirituality and resilience I will become. I see the ghost of the petals I have dropped and recognize that they are mine. What I used to think were breadcrumbs of the universe have transformed into the quiet sound of drumming, drawing me nearer to my ancestors. They await me, and I am awaiting myself, and though I mourn parts of me lost and parts of me present, I am comforted by the sight of the me that I am and have always been and the me that will be. Even without the foresight of when.

But what about me now? Me as I am today, sitting before my laptop. What values live inside of me? I reflect back on the me’s I have been and the petals I have dropped and look for what still stands. Love, intuition, and strength are the bones of my soul. The twigs that still stand even in the coldest winter, waiting for another spring to birth new life, budding into ambition, spirituality and resilience. Budding parts of me both old and new, like this drive strong enough that I woke that damn creativity bear up so that I could bare my heart and soul here. And as I tune back into my surroundings, the ticking of that broken clock reminds me but without the foresight of when, that it is time for me to present this thing that is me. So here I am.

The End.

[kelsieengen]

Today I’m so pleased to have S.A. Edwards joining us! I’ve had the pleasure of reading some of her Mage series drafts and they’ve been fun adventures involving Nephilum and all sorts of imaginative monsters and creatures.

Hi, Sophie! Thanks for joining us today on the blog. I’m so thrilled to see your trilogy was published in complete form this month! Congratulations on that awesome achievement!

Without further ado, let’s get to the interview!

Q: Did you publish the first book/story that you wrote?

A: Haha no! That book will never see the light of day. As much as I was – and still am – so proud of having achieved a finished novel, the writing was terrible. I’ve learned so much since. But it was great experience, and it showed me that if I put my mind to it, I can achieve anything.

Q: My first ones were awful too! That’s such a good mindset to have though. How many books and short stories have you written? (And how many of those early ones were never published?)

A: I am currently working on my seventh novel. I wrote several short stories before giving a novel a go, but I lost count along the way. My debut novel was my fourth attempt at publication.

Q: Seven! Awesome. Are you published? And if so, traditional or indie?

A: I have two books published through Idris Press Publishing: Mage: The Guardian’s Oath and Mage: The Ancient’s Might. Book three is due to be released in July 2020.

Q: Congratulations on those publications! I’m thrilled to be able to share the links to those works down below at the end of this interview.

What is the best advice you could give an aspiring author?

A: Learn all you can. Take a course. Join Scribophile. Write. And read. And write some more. Because the longer you spend learning, the better you’ll become, and one year, two years, ten years down the line, when you look back on previous writing, you’ll see a huge difference in your knowledge and skill, and you’ll be one step closer to writing ‘The End’ on a novel, to reaching publication or touching someone’s heart.

Q: Those are all great suggestions. What project are you working on now?

A: I’m working on a new novel now, a new series, but I won’t say much more of that for the time being. Updates will be released on my page in the future.

Q: Ooh, mysterious! All right, we’ll let you keep your secrets for now. How did you get started writing?

A: As long as I can remember I’ve been a daydreamer, often living my childhood in fantasy lands instead of focusing on what I should, but the thought of writing a novel had never occurred to me until my mother suggested I give it a go. I found the idea intriguing and loved the thought of having my very own book as a book rather than stapled-together pieces of paper, as had previously been made. And from there, I believe, my writing journey began.

Q: That’s awesome. I think so many writers start out like that and feel the magic when we turn our thoughts to paper. What is your favorite non-writing activity?

A: I love photography, especially photo manipulation.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Q: Oh that sounds fun. I love photography too, but don’t put nearly the time into it I should to get better. But let’s return to writing. What inspired your most recent story?

A: A dream inspired the start of my series – The Nephilium Lands. It caught my attention enough that I knew I could do something with it, and the rest, as they say, is history. If you’ll pardon the cliché.

Q: Consider it pardoned! 😉 What’s your biggest writing distraction? How do you combat it?

A: The days I can’t be bothered. Maybe I want to play about on Photoshop or watch a programme or sit in the garden on the rare occasion we have sun warm enough to lounge in. The only way to combat it is to push through or set a time limit or make myself write. Or I just take my phone outside and lounge in the sun while I keep writing on my notes!

Q: Great tips. What is the single most challenging thing about being an author?

A: Patience. When you sit at a computer and know there’s still at least 80,000 words left until the end of the book, and then several rounds of edits and criticism and work to go until it’s finally finished, it can be discouraging and overwhelming. Without patience, I would have struggled to finish. Looking ahead, after all, is a distraction in itself. I can get so caught up in how much more I have to go that I forgo living in the present and focusing on one thing at a time. One word at a time adds up. I just have to keep going.

Q: That’s so true. And such a great way of phrasing it. What author (living or dead) would you most like to chat with?

A: Anthony Horowitz. Or Steven Moffat. I’m a big fan!

Q: Where can we find you after this interview?

A: You can find me here on Facebook, where I post inspiration on writing and news on upcoming books.

Where can we find your publications? Amazon

Mage: The Guardian’s Oath (UK link) (US link) – Available Now

Mage: The Ancient’s Might (UK link) (US link) – Available Now

Mage: The Eternal Realm (UK link) (US link)– Released July 4th 2020

Thanks so much for joining us, Ms. Edwards! It’s been a pleasure chatting.

  Like this post? Please give it a share! Help get the word out about fantastic authors!

Author Interview: S.A. Edwards Today I'm so pleased to have S.A. Edwards joining us! I've had the pleasure of reading some of her Mage series drafts and they've been fun adventures involving Nephilum and all sorts of imaginative monsters and creatures.

[fyeah-redvelvet]

[TRANS] Allure July Issue - Joy

What do you think about most these days? Am I doing well right now? I have these thoughts often. I think I tend to think about my future self a bit more. Also, ‘I hope people like our upcoming summer album’. 

What is summer to you? It feels like everything is alive! A season filled with energy!

What color would you compare it to if you could? Green. I like the nature, so I like the natural green you can only see during the summer. 

Do you have a summer memory? When I was younger, I remember playing in the river in front of my house with my siblings. I acted as their guardian so I would wash them up afterwards. I liked taking care of my siblings when I was younger.

What’s your favorite summer fruit? Watermelon and kiwi. I like eating them raw rather than in salads.

How was the house you filmed in today? Would you like to live in it? I’ve wanted to live in a house close to nature. Because I wanted a space where my dog, Haetnim, can run around freely. I like that this house has a yard.

If this house could become your dorm, and you had to be in charge of one thing, what would it be? I don’t even clean my own room though? (laughs) Hmm, I want to be in charge of the garden.

When do you feel like your members are family? When I feel that our relationship has gotten stronger after a difficult schedule. I think I get that feeling when we say encouraging words to one another. We know one another well enough that we can tell when someone is having a hard time without them saying so. 

With the release of your new album coming up, what excites you the most? It’s an album that’s bright and exciting and gets more addicting the more you listen to it. I’ve really curious about peoples’ reactions to the song. I like it, but it’s quite a new genre upon first listen. I’m worried and excited at the same time about peoples’ reactions.

Do you have a non-title song that you like? I like the song ‘My Dear’. It’s very lovely and makes you feel better when you listen to it. 

As you promote as Red Velvet’s Joy, what has changed about human Park Sooyoung? Joy works harder to be more positive and give off bright energy. I end up putting all the energy I have into Joy, and so Park Sooyoung is more reserved and filled with thoughts. I guess she’s a deeper person? I like to meditate as well. However, as an artist, I try to focus on my brighter appearance. 

Do you have a life ‘keyword’ you try not to forget? Let’s not bother anybody else.  (t/n: the meaning behind this is a little deeper. it’s more along the lines of: if i do something, let’s do it without harming/bothering anybody else, not getting in the way of someone else)

If you had one summer day to yourself, and you could do anything you wanted, what would you do? I went to Danang in the past, and I really liked the pool villa there. As soon as I saw it, I thought of my family. If I were given free time, I’d like to go there with my family and Haetnim to relax. 

I’ll give you time to show off Haetnim.  First, she’s so kind and gentle. And smart. I think her personality is similar to mine. When she does her own thing, she does it quietly without bothering anybody else. And she reads my mind first to comfort me. So whenever I’m with Haetnim, I feel comforted. 

What was Joy’s biggest recent happiness?  Going on a walk with Haetnim. Usually, we go on walks around my house, but when I’m busy my mom brings her over to me and we take a walk. When my mom sees me after a while, she gets all happy. That side of her breaks my heart a little.

If Red Velvet had a new reality program, what would you like to do in it? I want to be given a mission or do a bunch of games. Recently, I played the mafia game on a variety program, and it was really fun. I think it’d be fun to play such things with my members. Rather than going somewhere, I think it’d be more fun to just play around comfortably. 

Is there a member that’s good with games? It depends on the game, but overall Irene unnie.

Your vocal parts have increased. How do you try to express yourself? I want to change my vocal tone freely depending on the song’s atmosphere or its lyrics. If you listen carefully to our songs, you can actually tell that my voice is slightly different. So I try to express myself hoping that my voice becomes the theme of the song.

Is there a part that you had that sticks with you until now? Rather than my parts, I tend to like our songs as a whole. The one that comes to mind right now is ‘Hear The Sea’. When I sing that song, it reminds me of summer-related things starting from its lyrics and so on. Like I’m in a Japanese animation? It’s refreshing yet dreamy at the same time.

Which Red Velvet song has your favorite lyrics? We have a song called ‘You Better Know’. I think those lyrics really touched my heart.

If you didn’t become a singer and fulfilled your childhood dream of being a teacher, what would you have taught? I have a friend who dreamed to be a teacher with me, and she actually became one. But when I listen to her stories, I think I did a good job of becoming a singer (laughs). 

Are you interested in beauty a lot?  I am. I think that a person can last long if they have various images rather than sticking to one. There are times when makeup plays a big part in those various images being expressed. I believe that beauty has spread from simply physical beauty to inner beauty as well, so I try to pay attention to that as well. On regular days, I prefer to walk around as my natural self. I don’t wear makeup a lot, and I try to focus on my inside. I try to take care of myself rather than just my physical self.

Is there a photoshoot you want to try? What would it be like to film me in my everyday life without being dolled up? I’m curious about how the results would look myself. 

You’ve self-agreed that you have weak stamina among the members. Is there anything that’s helped you out these days? Recently, I started an exercise called ballet fitness. There were a lot of muscles I’ve been using incorrectly, and I thought that I had good posture, but I was wrong. I’m feeling that myself and working on muscle training. It’s difficult now because I’m trying to strengthen my stamina, but I continue to do it because I believe it’ll help. Sometimes I don’t want to go, but after I finish, I feel like I’ve lived a plentiful day. 

You said you wanted to be born as a puppy your next life. I’m curious as to what breed you’d be. I want to be born as a maltese, Haetnim’s breed, and have endless conversations with her. What she’s thinking, what she’s feeling, I want to hear her stories correctly.

trans credit: jinhee @ fyeah-redvelvet! original source: SCAN by SGSGOM @ TWITTER please take out with credits!

[recentanimenews]

How The Sailor Soldiers of 'Sailor Moon Crystal' Inspired me

Most of the kids I grew up with watched Dragon Ball Z on a regular basis, but I broke the mold among my friends when I became obsessed with Sailor Moon. As a child, I instantly fell in love with the show's fun characters, gorgeous transformations, cool outfits, and flashy attacks. I received some funny looks from friends and family alike for wanting to be Sailor Jupiter for Halloween one year, but my love for the show never truly deteriorated. 

  As I started to re-experience the show with Sailor Moon Crystal, I was reminded of all of my favorite characters and moments that I grew up with. It then began to dawn on me just how much the Sailor Soldiers reflected in my childhood, and what I've taken from each of them as I grew up. They ended up having a major influence on the person I am today, so I've decided to take the time to talk about each Soldier and the lessons they taught me that I still abide by.

     The Sailor Soldiers were an enormous and influential part of many a millenial's formative years, so I'm sure I'm not the only one who saw themselves in these pretty soldiers.

  Usagi Tsukino - Sailor Moon

The eponymous leader of the Sailor Soldiers hardly exhibits any desirable leadership qualities. Usagi Tsukino is clumsy, lazy, and prone to crying fits. If she had it her way, she'd eat junk food, read gag manga, and sleep through any responsibility she had -- whether it be her homework or saving the world. As the future queen of the Moon Kingdom and a fighter responsible for getting rid of monsters in Tokyo, she's certainly not anyone's first choice for a hero. 

    Even so, she has a few shining moments when her courage bubbles up and she becomes determined to save the day. When innocent people are in danger, she'll never hesitate to help them out. In the past, she's even made enormous sacrifices in order to help others. She might mess up and she'll most certainly need someone to lend her a hand, but she'll always try her best to get things done.

  I've taken that with me into my adulthood. After I graduated college, it was a struggle to search for a job and try to make something of myself. Even with a steady place of work, the daily load would sometimes be overwhelming. But I remembered what Usagi went through, and realized that no one around me was living as a perfect adult either. We're all just people trying to plod through the day, but we only need a few bursts of courage to see us through some of the hardships, even if it's just for a moment. Sailor Moon taught me that people don't have to be at their best all the time, and that we can be when it counts.

  Ami Mizuno - Sailor Mercury

Dedicated to her studies and preferring to spend her time with books, Ami Mizuno grew up shy and isolated from other people. It didn’t help that her peers were often put off by her intelligence and thought of her as arrogant and snobbish, not realizing how often she struggled. The opinions of others impacted her strongly, to the point where she began relying on them to quantify her self-worth.

After meeting Usagi, who greeted her intellect with wonder and friendliness, she started gaining more confidence. She became less dependent on what other people thought of her and became expressive with her own feelings, gaining more friends in the process. As a student and even as the strategic Sailor Mercury, Ami became a confident and formidable young girl.

Confidence is always something I could use in abundance. It’s not always easy for me to write or talk to others or express myself honestly, and I’ll sometimes obsess over people’s opinions instead of allowing myself a little faith in my skills. Sailor Mercury taught me that becoming more confident is a gradual process, but that it’s always possible to believe in yourself. We don’t need to thrive on other people to find worth in ourselves, and we’re capable of accomplishing so much more than others expect.

Rei Hino - Sailor Mars

As a practitioner of Shinotism at her grandfather’s shrine, Rei Hino is dedicated to her craft. That dedication has made her disciplined and practical in all her ventures, whether she’s trying to manage her shrine or stretch her music-making skills. She can even be a bit stubborn at times, often butting heads with Usagi at every turn. But she never forgets her duties and remains focused on what’s more important. The fiery Sailor Mars can always work together with her fellow soldiers.

One thing I can say I appreciate about Sailor Mars is that she’s strong-willed. In both her hobbies and her duties, she tries to see each of them through with a fiery passion that I could use more of myself. She maintains an effortlessly charismatic demeanor and carries herself elegantly in ways I still wish to attain, and her complete and utter dedication to her craft makes her inspiring.

Makoto Kino - Sailor Jupiter

When one first meets Makoto Kino, they might be a little intimidated. She’s tall, tough, and could easily overpower anyone in a fight with brute force. She stood out among her fellow students with the demeanor of a delinquent, and was plagued by rumors that she was expelled from her old school before transferring. No one took the time to get to know her because they were afraid.

  When Usagi and friends met her, they discovered a far different girl than what rumors suggested. They met a girl who loves to cook and garden, and wants to own a cake and flower shop when she grows up. Sure, she could still kick your butt, either as the shockingly strong Sailor Jupiter or even just on her own, but she balances her masculinity and femininity without sacrificing either of them.

On my path to becoming a transgender feminist, one important step I took was unlearning the bias of restrictive gender roles. I started on that at a relatively young age thanks to two people. One of them was my mother, a hard-working doctor who remains the breadwinner of my family. The other was Sailor Jupiter. Among my fictional role models, she was one of the first who helped me shatter the ideas of gender roles all together. She helped me discover that no one should have to be beholden by whatever society expects of them, especially when it comes to gender. As one of the most masculine AND the most feminine members of the Soldiers, Sailor Jupiter truly laid the foundation for the kind of person I want to become.

Minako Aino - Sailor Venus

Minako Aino is talented, friendly, and a hell of a diva. She dreams of being a famous celebrity, and lives her life in the spotlight as she chases down auditions. Minako also has a tendency to flaunt her nuanced relationship advice, despite being desperate for her own real romance. Her dates may go awry, but she remains persistent in her romantic endeavors. She’s as dedicated to her own life as she is to being Sailor Venus, taking the helm for the team as they protect their future queen. No matter what she does, Minako goes hard.

That unabashed dedication she has is nothing short of commendable. She fulfills her duty as a Sailor Soldier with fervor, but she still remains committed to her own life and her own goals. She’s a testament to the idea that people never have to give up on their own dreams, even when other responsibilities have to take priority every now and then. Sailor Venus knows what she has to do and never forgets what she wants to do.

Setsuna Meioh - Sailor Pluto

An anomaly among the Sailor Soldiers, Sailor Pluto stands guard at the Gates of Time and doesn’t initially have a human form. She’s simply dedicated to her role as the Guardian of Time. After a tragic end, she is eventually revived as high school student Setsuna Meioh, and simply tries to exist in the human world while assisting the Inner Soldiers as needed.

It’s hard to gauge what I learned from Sailor Pluto, as she isn’t terribly present to begin with. She has a few shining moments where she puts her life on the line to fulfill her duties to her kingdom, and she tries her best to humanize herself when interacting with the other Soldiers. If anything, I admire her stalwart commitment to her duties.

Haruka Tenoh and Michiru Kaioh - Sailor Uranus and Sailor Neptune

Haruka Tenoh is a race car fanatic who embodies her masculinity and femininity with pride and style. Michiru Kaioh is a genius and a violinist who lives life on a runway as she dazzles her world with grace and finesse. Together, they make the ultimate lesbian power couple. The two of them together are unstoppable, both as lovers and as the formidable Outer Soldiers of Sailor Uranus and Sailor Neptune. The two of them ooze confidence and charisma in everything they do, and they remain awesome pillars of empowerment and representation.

Uranus and Neptune deserve a section together for the world they introduced me to. I grew up with a dub that called the two of them cousins, but I knew better, and a little research revealed that they were a lesbian couple. They were my first introduction to the realm of LGBTQ+, and opened up my concepts of romance and identity. Growing up male, I mistook Uranus as a male Sailor Soldier, which made her a role model for me and kicked off my childhood dream of becoming one myself. Then I learned her identity was much more nuanced than that. She embodies and identifies with both her masculinity and femininity with a complete disregard for resignment to any one gender expression.

If Sailor Jupiter began deconstructing gender roles for me, Sailor Uranus shattered them. And her relationship with Sailor Neptune was eye-opening for me. In a lot of ways, these two Soldiers were my awakening of sorts. They were my first look into a world that ended up becoming a huge part of my life, and I’ll be forever grateful to them for that.

Hotaru Tomoe - Sailor Saturn

Yet another interesting case among the Sailor Soldiers, Hotaru Tomoe is quite literally marred by a tragic past. After an incident that took her mother and nearly killed her, Hotaru was made into a cyborg by her maniacal father and was made to host an evil entity. In her subsequent isolation, she made friends with Chibiusa and tried regaining her humanity little by little.

Eventually, she is revealed to be Sailor Saturn, an all-powerful Soldier responsible for destroying the Moon Kingdom for it to start anew on Earth. Her immense power over life and death was feared by all the Soldiers, especially when she very nearly destroyed the planet upon her awakening.

I’ve always admired characters who are able to overcome shyness and hardships in their lives in order to accomplish new things, and Sailor Saturn is one of those characters. Despite a father who scarred her, a spirit who violated her, and a fate that overwhelmed her, Sailor Saturn rose above many of her demons into order to live her own life. Her ultimate fate might be bittersweet, but I like to think it was due to her regaining a sense of humanity that allowed her to achieve the end that she did. After all, as a Sailor Soldier whose purpose was to bring about death and destruction, she was able to conquer that pretty well.

Overall, I've learned a ton from the Sailor Soldiers and even if you've never experienced the series before, I recommend giving Sailor Moon Crystal a try!

Did you grow up with the Sailor Soldiers as role models? Which one was your favorite? Comment and let us know!

--------

Carlos is a freelance features writer for Crunchyroll. Their favorite genres range from magical girls to over-the-top robot action, yet their favorite characters are always the obscure ones. Check out some of their satirical work on The Hard Times.

Do you love writing? Do you love anime? If you have an idea for a features story, pitch it to Crunchyroll Features

  By: news+feed@crunchyroll.com