#referencing my 13yo ofc

[bookishjules]

yesterday, one of the first things the 13yo i babysit said to me was kindly asking "how is keefe?" (she knew i'd finished 8.5 the day before and mildly lost my mind) to which i responded like girl i'm only on p50 of stellarlune rn we don't even know where he is let alone how he is! and she was like *nods* "but like how is he. is he alive?" ..and reader when i tell you the room went silent. her younger sister and i just looked at each other wide-eyed and then back at my 13yo like wdym IS HE ALIVE. is he ever NOT alive?? you can't just say something like that and expect it not to haunt me hello?? needless to say i'm now reading stellarlune at an increasingly desperate pace bc while i'm sure my 13yo must've been toying with me, i unfortunately have developed a Fear :D