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nailtravels · 6 years ago

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Whether you’re a greenhorn or a bonefide festival warrior, every trip is completely different. The subtle waves and troughs within the extended patterns of the festivarian season can be serious and ultimately transformational. When real life rears its ugly head into the glamorous world of camping/music festivals, what’s to be done? When the puddled mannequin of Bacchus falls right off the roof of the van what’s a hobo to do? One can choose to slug down inordinate water jugs of moonshine and cry tears of forlorn anguish into the forest. Take moonlit golf cart rides through distant fields, reminiscing with beloved comrades. Sing at the top of the voice hole with Nikki Tally or chemical bluegrass around the late-night campfire. When you put it all together it’s called Kamp Happiness and this train to glory has arrived at the Suwannee Spring Reunion 2019: Hobo Kamp.

Consider yourself very lucky the rest of the Shawsvegas Mafia got called away on business. They play very well with others.

Kamp Happiness Hobo Kamp, Suwannee Spring Reunion 20129: photo by Katie Egger

Everybody just relax. While there are always variations, all festivals share some common characteristics. Fingernails get broken and dirty. Someone finds a tick in their nether regions. The courtesy shuttle gets lost and sling shots are brought in to hang the lights in the canopy. While it doesn’t always rain, there are always puddles. Wet or dry, the music lives here and it’s always up early and ready to shovel lava rocks. Whether it’s Billy Strings or on the Amphitheater Stage or Special Ed gettin’ washed in the blood around the campfire, Suwannee Spring Reunion has always been and continues to be one of the most special opportunities for families and tribes to get together for distinctly unique brand of camping and music adventure in the woods of Live Oak, Florida.

In every sense, this festival is a family reunion. Extended cousins came from all over the country to join together in compounds of tents and rvs to celebrate their love for each other while getting down to some of the finest home-grown music around. Down from Valdosta comes the crazy uncle with the same name as his dog. The lunatic brother and his wife arrive from Mexico Beach and God knows what kind of extended reprobates would be joining from Jacksonville Beach. But blood is blood and you don’t get to pick your family. Except this time you do and the Kamp Happiness Hobo Kamp Installation continues to grow with new cousins and insane red-headed step-children everyday.

Chemical Bluegrass, Suwannee Spring Reunion 2019: photo by Katie Egger

“Quit pullin’ on the jug. I’m going to need you in the field tomorrow.”

The morning golf cart parade has arrived under the clothesline, covered with tour shirts drying in the rain. Welcome to Hobo Kamp where severe fancy glamping has been perfectly balanced with an almost thuggish, liberal sensibility. These are the chosen ones. Living freely in the dirt of the forest, passing time slowly. The meals are cooked in the Dutch oven over the campfire where friends gather to sing or tell lies. The blinking lights, hammocks and pleasure palaces are bookended by inflatable clowns, rivers of shine and groundscored furniture. When it rains, she gets wet. Dirty feet and flapping tapestries are the order of the day. It may seem loose and untethered but there is an distinct, underlying order to the entire operation. Like an anthill. No real rules to be sure.

Where, you may ask, is the Adventure Wagon? Oh weary traveler, she is lost. From Houston to Mountain View, from the Quinault rain forest to Tonkawa Oklahoma, she is gone to her final reward. Left on the side of the road at Paine’s Prairie, with rods blown and smoke billowing. The final death rattle could barely be heard over the Jerry Garcia Band playing “Let it rock.” Lucy and Baitbucket rescued from the wilds of Old Florida by Miah and Kattie Waffle. Living well at Hobo Kamp but without a means of transportation, things were sure to get sporting. Would homesteading be an option or as with most homeless gypsies, would they have to eventually retreat further into the swamp? Lucienda Rosalita was in a mood. The cool nights left the open aired mediation tent chilly and, in her opinion, rather “exposed”.

Billy Strings, Suwannee Spring Reunion 2019: photo by Sarah Fortier

As a young man he may have believed that there was some hidden, underlying set of rules when it came to the festival arena. He was inexperienced at such things and had someone told him something was expected or assumed, he might have believed it. Now he was older and knew better that such things really did not exist. When that hippy Gypsy, next door to the Poncho Tree mandated the kamp not play cajons or Jimmy Buffett, it was Scotty Smiles who would “augment and refine” those rules all day on Vassar Sunday. Can there a leashless world with mutual respect? There are no unwritten rules. There are only real rules. Like don’t carry contraband in Nelson County.

For the camper who needs peace and quiet at any time during the festival experience, the Hobo Kamp may not be the place for you. The Spirit of Suwannee Music Park has over 800 acres of property for which to kamp. If your can’t sleep to the sound of lopey bluegrass or the cackling shrill of Sunshine and her hens then perhaps you might consider a spot further back in the woods or grassy knoll. There are so many beautiful camping spots at the park. Why put yourself in the center or the silliness if you’re going to have an opinion about what anybody else does? Forgo all expectations. Lower the bar and not care so much. Have you really seen what these rednecks are capable of in the wee hours of the hidden forest? It can absolutely boggle the mind.

Late night bluegrass, Suwannee Spring Reunion 2019: photo by Katie Egger

Hobo Kamp Hours of Operation: 24 hours-7 days a week with kamp representatives available at all times. Whether it’s Eddie’s earlybirds or the late-night dab lab, the shop is always open. Every once in a blue moon, there might be an hour or two of quiet, but don’t come expecting it. For the camper who needs to be in the broth but also wants to sleep quietly, there’s always earplugs. Pack carefully. Bring soup. Make good choices.

The Spirit of Suwannee Music Park is a special place for a great number of people. The weather, the music and the fellowship make this one of the premier music/camping venues in the country. Visit their website and like their social media channels on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. It’s like Horning’s Hideout except one can bring in crates of Knob Creek. This is the wiggle room. People come here to remember and their relationship to the place is separate from both the people and the music.

Pickin’ chair, Suwannee Spring Reunion 2019: photo by Sarah Fortier

In this episode of gibberish and whimsy, we explore the unwritten rules of a festival or the real possibility that there may not be any. When is it too early to crack the whip? How late can the campfire music linger before tents begin hurling insults? Most of the time this forest is empty and quiet. When pushing up against hundreds or thousands of other festivarians in the forest, things can sometimes get a little weird.

Hobo Kamp Rules?

Body Slam Breakfast: Apparently, there is no golf cart Stevie Wonder after ten o’clock. We are definitely going to have another look at that. It can be understood that folks at a “folksy” kind of festival might want to just listen to bluegrass music, but in this modern era of diverse line-ups and audiences, we can expect to be introduced to some new and exciting influences. Katie Magic’s Breakfast Jam kicked off the next morning with “Shoop” by Salt and Pepa>Body Slam by The Floozies. More Breakfast Jams to come on the playlist and, as always, your input is appreciated. What would be a good song for the breakfast jump up?

Golf Cart Parade: Whether it’s with the Kendalls, Ted, Kent, Patrick or Sarah and Sarah, the golf cart lane will please remain clear at all times. Golf carts are the wizard’s broom that makes cross-camp travel possible. Where is the painted bridge or the lost hay field? These can be exciting excursions with the right guide? Even if you’ve had a felony, you’re still allowed to drive a golf cart. You just can’t own a fire arm.

Suwannee Spring Reunion Silliness: photos by Sarah Fortier

Audience Participation: The Kamp Happiness House Band working day begins as soon as Special Ed gets done with the coffee and ends as soon as the guitars get rained on. Thanks to Mitch the mando picker and his family band for turning the Sunday night bluegrass jam into a roaring session straight out of the revival tent. Other notables around the fire were band members from Donna the Buffalo and Billy Strings. It’s just nice when everybody plays together.

The Spring Reunion Sunday night jams at Slopperyland, Quicksilver, Kamp Happiness and a slew of other smaller pickin’ circles remained feisty throughout the night and the string sounds lifted high in to the forest. This party offers one of the best opportunities to play and listen to home-grown campfire music. It’s no joke.

Are you easily influenced?

The River Exit Strategy: With no transportation, one should always consider traveling the old way, leisurely down the ancient Suwannee River. Or down the Coochie? Yes, son the Withlacoochee. A ten-day jaunt to where the river meets the sea. Be sure to pour rum in each ear to kill the river critters. Also, remember Suwannee Springs. Right across the road, this natural freshwater spring offers campers a place to wash their souls in its mystical, healing waters.

Diversification Clause: As a kamp family continues to grow, it’s membership becomes increasingly diverse. This is one of the characteristics of a strong family and there are sure to be growing pains. Whether it’s mistakenly bringing a ladder when someone clearly asked for a lighter (pronounced ladder) or the proper spelling of “jon’t to?” variances in speech and behavior should be expected. If Linda-Joy or Dr. Thermometer say, “reefa” or “pot-sticka”, context clues should be used to help better understand the vernacular.

Courtesy Vehicle: At all hours the Kamp Happiness courtesy vehicle is available for use. Please return the bike when you’re done. It sounds so simple but somehow the idea is flawed. To where are all the bikes disappearing? Maybe the English girl took them? Jolly good idea. It would have to wait until the next morning, when she answered the door and in her lovely English accent asked, “Would you like a coffee and a dab?” This girl is obviously innocent. And her man who likes taking “heroic” (5g) doses of fresh mushrooms before diving into the river. The whole crowd had been known to dabble but nothing like those animals, the Buttscratchers.

We’ll get to them later.

Thanks to DreamSpider Music and Events for inviting us to be part of the fun and congratulations on that beautiful baby.

Thanks to everyone who contributed photos for the article. Especially Sarah Fortier and Katie Egger whose photography talents are a real pleasure to exploit. Keep up with Sarah as she joins our team covering Floydfest and visit Katie’s site at smileforcamera.com. Like her social media sites at Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

It’s fun to watch young people growing into kamp moms. To be so delicate and beautiful, Sarah will season chicken with dirt and ash and drink crotch whiskey before heading out to groundscore broken furniture all day. Katie managed not only to hold it together for the entire weekend, but pretty much joined her mother, Sunshine’s side as one of the butt-kickinest women in the tri-camp area.

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Kamp Happiness and nailtravels would like to invite all of our extended family to join us this festival season in celebrating the life and passing of our brother Clay Walthall. The original Shawsvegas Mafia was an upstanding father, husband, son and Kamp Happiness founding member, He was a nailtravels corespondent, covering events such as Wanee, Hulaween, Floydfest and Brainquility and when he was geared up for a late-night Bassnectar show, there was going to be a shift in the underlying tectonic plates.

In honoring his memory we hope to exemplify the qualities that made him so special; friendliness, respect, forgiveness, courtesy, big fun and a humble ability to love that was virtually unmatched. One thing is for sure, he would never let anyone around him get hurt.

Look for our team at Tipper and Friends Moonlight Gathering, which he would likely have been attending. He always said, “I’ll be in Kamp Happiness so long as I can camp with the wooks.” After that, we’ll be found at Backwoods Music Festival in the near future. #clayfest19

Suwannee Spring Reunion 2019: Hobo Kamp Whether you're a greenhorn or a bonefide festival warrior, every trip is completely different. The subtle waves and troughs within the extended patterns of the festivarian season can be serious and ultimately transformational.

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