#ready to watch Haru fight with his pride again in the movies

[caffernnn]

Yeah hi again! More tsoa au snippets anyone?

Now that i think about it, albert could be apollo in tsoa, so imagine him taking a look at makoto climbing the walls of troy, disdainfully raises his nose, spits "puny little mortal" and flicks him off the wall with godly telekinetic powers to be killed by our hector, which is hiyori; i mean albert is already symbolized as a god in canon.

Kinjou could be the dickwad pyrrhus since people refer to pyrrhus as achilles without his patroclus, and kinjou is hinted to have given up personal relationships in order to be a stronger swimmer, and fans theorize him to be creating a rift between haru and mako, so yea...there's that. He could be our proud, arrogant, homophobic lil shit pyrrhus who thinks everybody should be like him- friendless and glory-hungry.

AJHSAKDJSK I WANT TO SEE THE CONFRONTATION BETWEEN BRISEIS AND PATROCLUS AS KISUMI AND HARU!!! Imagine haru being mad at kisumi for daring to touch makoto even after his death, when all kisumi wanted to do was clean him since he doesn't deserve to lie in filth, and haru goes apeshit that nobody should touch his makoto and kisumi goes "you're not the only one who ever loved him!!". Kisumi goes on to rant that haru only cares about chasing his honor and that makoto only died to save his reputation, which i got from a prompt under the #kisumako tag where kisumi confronts haru about how makoto chose him instead of kisumi even though he only takes makoto for granted, then jabs haru with "i wish hiyori kills you tomorrow" and haru goes "do you not think i wish the same?" Omg I'm just quoting from the book at this point I'm so sorry 🤭🤭😅😅✌✌✌

I have an idea on how to include the fireworks scen to the scene where patroclus convinces achilles to fight and save the greeks where haru goes "not you too! Do you not see how they don't care for me?!?!" Or like how they are only nice when they need him smth like that and makoto drops the bomb "then let me fight in your stead" and haru goes on an an Achilles-like tantrum "ask me of anything, but not this!!!" Anw that's not the whole dialogue but haru relents in the end.

Imahine hharu arriving in the underworld expecting to find makoto waiting for him only to be unable to find him even after an eternity of searching, so finally breaks, like the fireworks aftermath where he looked like he just got dumped by his bf, and ge curls into himself, realizing he may have lost makoto forever (again)

I just can't stop thinking how the gay panic nao gave makoto is very similar to odysseus' "sharing beds is gay" comment, so imagine makoto, who followed haru everywhere and shared everything with him, suddenly distancing himself and sleeping outside their tent because he feels that he cannot let the entire army they are gay, especially haru, the best of the greeks, so haru confronts him "what's wrong?" And then they resolve by saying "let them think what they want" or "i will not let them hinder us" or "we don't have to change" smth like that and proceeds to do their nightly cuddle, kinda like the dolphin courtship ritual they performed at the pool.

Aaahhh i just want to expand on phoinix's (that would be mikhail???) story about the king who supposedly was forced to choose between his pride or people he rules, and he chose his pride, even with the king's wife (best friend, in this context??? The king in the story would be ryuuji) and did not help his people win the war so his people turned against him. The wife's name sounds like patroclus, and so phoinix was hinting that only makoto could talk haru into fighting. Makoto had to fight, which results to angst, since haru chose his pride, much like the king (pls let this not be what happens in the movie kyoani we beg you)

So that's it. I'll send more when the ideas come. I swear i will try to turn this into a fic if i ever get out of my slump. IF 😫😫😫

Patrochilles AU fans, come get y’all’s juice 💕

It’s always so interesting to see people explore Haru’s relationship with his own pride because it’s definitely multidimensional. There are so many characters who fall victim to their own hubris or struggle with it more externally (the people who appear as antagonists or rivals to Haru both in canon and in different AUs), but it feels more complicated with Haru, at least to me. His pride doesn’t manifest through Haru boasting about his talents or trying to control/lead people, especially early on in his story - the moment(s) his self-esteem shifts into a double-edged pride is when his belief in his current successes and happiness stops him and the people around him from growing and changing. That’s his downfall. My thoughts from my own Free! x Hadestown AU are sporadic at best, but this verse always makes me think about Haru, especially his descent into hopelessness during ES:

Haru falls apart when he clings to his vision of comfort and happiness and forgets the ever-changing life involved in that scene. He holds onto the life he has with Makoto, the life he has with his friends, the life he has swimming however or whenever he wants to… and he blinds himself from the reality that everything evolves and continues to change. His pride comes out in his desperate delusion that he can stop the hands of time through willpower and refusing to watch time go by. He’s definitely not the only one going through this sort of internal battle (I’d argue many of the “antagonist” characters go through similar struggles) but it’s the one we arguably get the most insight on.

ALSO: I love Haru dearly but I also love seeing characters pull himself out of his own head for a bit. That Kisumi interaction to remind Haru that Makoto was loved by a lot of people? Knowing Makoto often holds himself back when it comes to Haru because he’s almost too aware of Haru being watched by the world around them?? There’s so much there to explore I just !!!!

I’m rambling, but thanks for sharing as always!

[blackidyll]

It's been a long while since I've been on Tumblr, but here I am, trying to get back into my usual rhythm of life. Mainly: I'm alive, but I'm really, really tired.

The end of 2019/beginning of 2020 has been really insane. I fell sick for most of December - the whole cough/cold/sore throat trifecta that got so bad I finally ended up on antibiotics on New Year's Eve. I actually took two weeks of leave in December, but I was so sick and busy during this time that I basically got no rest whatsoever, and when I got back to work in January it was to drop straight into an absolute tsunami of work - one huge project ended the day before Chinese New Year, and immediately after CNY holidays I had another huge executive event to prepare for (I was working over weekends), and when that ended last week I got YET ANOTHER project dumped on me. Covid19 and the political situation in my home country is also taking its toll. I feel like the past two months has been an absolute blur - mostly of stress and negativity.

I'm so tired, you all.

Anyway, I'm trying hard now to pull back and strike a balance between work and having down proper time. I owe quite a few of you replies to messages and chats, and TBH there's like 60+ comments in my AO3 inbox that I haven't had a chance to respond to. I'm going to try hard over the next few weeks to get to all of them. I really appreciate every message and comment I get, because they constantly remind me there's still people and the entire world out there, when sometimes it's so easy to get caught up in my head with all my stresses and worries and the day-to-day grind.

I'm going to go throw a bunch of things in my queue to get this place kickstarted again, but in the meantime - have some fic recs. I've been reading a lot of fic to keep afloat the past three months; these are the WIPs I'm following at the moment. I'm completely out of creativity so my own fics will have to wait, but it always gives me a boost when I see some love for my WIPs, so if any of these appeal to you, give them a read and drop some love to those authors too.

The Bureau Files series by Catsafari [The Cat Returns, episodic/case style canon-based sequel; Baron/Haru]

i kill giants by diasterisms [Star Wars new trilogy; canon-based sequel to The Rise of Skywalker; Rey/Ben]

Ragnarǫkr, Part 3 of the Sharingan Rising series by weialala [Naruto; canon-divergence with supernatural elements; Sasuke-centric, technically Sasuke/Naruto but is more Sasuke's relations with everyone]

Peripeteia, Part 4 of the Carry Your Heart verse by mondaze [Shingeki no Kyojin; canon-based A/B/O verse, eventually diverges at the retake Shinganshina arc because Erwin lives (\o/); Erwin/Levi]

Just Another Day by Tierfal [Fullmetal Alchemist; post-manga series, Roy has severe PTSD; pre-relationship Roy/Ed]

try something new by gdgdbaby [Nezha (2019); post-movie oneshot where the two have grown up and gotten their bodies back; Nezha/Aobing]

WIPs that haven't been updated recently but since I'm on a roll, you all should read them:

Nukume Dori by Leareth [Tokyo Babylon, X/1999; canon-divergence, kind-of time travel with X!Subaru falling back into the TB!timeline with all his memories intact; Subaru/Seishirou, a lot of trio interactions with Hokuto] 

boy with a coin, Part 5 of the signal to noise series by twigcollins [The World Ends With You; post-game sequels exploring the consequences of Neku winning the long game and Joshua deciding to bring him back to life; Joshua/Neku]

(more info and my comments on each fic under the cut, because they get long)

The Bureau Files series by Catsafari [The Cat Returns, episodic/case style canon-based sequel; Baron/Haru]

I've been (re)watching Studio Ghibli movies on the weekends and I fell completely in love with The Cat Returns (I love Whisper of the Heart but I missed this movie somehow?). This wonderful sequel fic series focuses on an adult Haru that becomes a full-fledge member of the Cat Bureau and goes on plenty of adventures with the Bureau crew. It's also 500K words (!!!) of delicious slow slow slow SLOW burn between Baron and Haru. I just found out the author will be posting the next installation in the series this month, so you know. Perfect time to read the existing content and then follow the author's weekly updates for more of this amazing series.

i kill giants by diasterisms [Star Wars new trilogy; canon-based sequel to The Rise of Skywalker; Rey/Ben]

Yes, I'm a Reylo fan. I find the grey dynamics between Rey and a vaguely redeemed Ben Solo fascinating. I think it's because I was such a huge Luke and Mara Jade shipper from the Legends days. Anyway, I'd recommend pretty much all of diasterisms's Reylo fics (they nail the characterization + growth arcs incredibly) but this WIP in particular is a direct TROS sequel, which is great for all us fans who were very WTF about the way TROS ended. Also - lots of Force ghosts :D

Ragnarǫkr, Part 2 of the Sharingan Rising series by weialala [Naruto; canon-divergence with supernatural elements; Sasuke-centric, technically Sasuke/Naruto but is more Sasuke's relations with everyone]

I think my bookmark gushes enough about this series (and the previous installment) that I don't need to rehash it here. But anyway, this sequel is flipping amazing. The world building is so incredible omg. The wait between chapters is very long but so very worth it.

Peripeteia, Part 4 of the Carry Your Heart verse by mondaze [Shingeki no Kyojin; canon-based A/B/O verse, eventually diverges at the retake Shinganshina arc because Erwin lives (\o/); Erwin/Levi]

I'm usually very, very particular about my A/B/O verses (the concept squicks me a little but some writers subvert the trope and those are amazing) and this is a really great take on the trope - Erwin and Levi bond first out of necessity and then have to rebuild/realize a romantic relationship out of it later; they're already such strong friends and incredible partners that the bond actually throws them out of whack initially lol. But the evolution of their relationship is so well written, and the sub-plot about Levi being targeted is also great. Anyway, in this particular sequel goes back to the canon-timeline; Erwin survives the Beast Titan charge, everyone finds out about Marley, and the Survey Corps goes on a mission to make contact with the outside world. I don't actually follow the manga but I know enough that this sequel is really intriguing me. Also, Erwin lives. Thank goodness Erwin lives.

Just Another Day by Tierfal [Fullmetal Alchemist; post-manga series, Roy has severe PTSD; pre-relationship Roy/Ed]

Everything Tierfal writes is golden, but this one. Oh man, this one. It gets dark, and sometimes that's bad if you're already stressed (your mood doesn't need more depressing things to drag it down) but sometimes... you also want to indulge in it, because when you see a character go through hard and traumatic times and make it out the other side, it gives you hope too, you know? Anyway, right now at chapter 2, it's all trauma and pain for Roy, so take caution while reading this fic, but......... Ed. Oh my goodness, Ed. He tries so hard. He doesn't give up. This fic reminds me a bit of But Not Buried This Time, where Ed is the one drowning in his guilt... I remember thinking while reading that fic, "goodness, everyone needs a Roy like this in their life." Well, for this fic? I just keep thinking, "goodness, everyone needs an Ed like this in their life."

try something new [Nezha (2019); post-movie oneshot where the two have grown up and gotten their bodies back; Nezha/Aobing]

not a WIP but what the hell. So this version of Nezha is hell of a lot different from the Nezha I remember of my childhood (in that....... Nezha 100% kills Aobing lol and I remember being very conflicted because I love dragons and Nezha kills a lot of them, but at the same time deity!Nezha is pretty badass?). So anyway, someone with creative control DEFINITELY has shipper glasses on when they made this movie, I cannot get over how adorable Nezha and Aobing are. I really enjoyed this movie, it was so over the top and funny. And they made Nezha and Aobing literal soulmates? This fic is cute and adorable because it's Nezha and Aobing traveling and helping the world after they grow up and regain their bodies, and it's just tons of adorable teenage(?) confusion where they're hovering on the edge of friendship and something more. THEY ARE SO ENDEARING I love them!!

Nukume Dori by Leareth [Tokyo Babylon, X/1999; canon-divergence, kind-of time travel with X!Subaru falling back into the TB!timeline with all his memories intact; Subaru/Seishirou, a lot of trio interactions with Hokuto]

Instead of dying on the Promised Day, 25-year-old Dragon of Heaven Subaru wakes up in his 16-year-old body during the Tokyo Babylon timeline. Having seen what the future holds, he decides to continue with his original Bet with Seishirou - this time fighting to win. In the latest installment, we go pass the TB timeline into the years before 1999 and the changes that the divergence makes is just absolutely fascinating, plus we start seeing more of the X/1999 cast, whom I love and adore.

boy with a coin, Part 5 of the signal to noise series by twigcollins [The World Ends With You; post-game sequels exploring the consequences of Neku winning the long game and Joshua deciding to bring him back to life; Joshua/Neku]

I love Joshua so so much but he digs his own bed willingly and he lies in it with all the broken pride he can muster. He's very much the master of forfeiting the game before he can lose, except this time it's Neku standing beside him, and Neku is very, very stubborn. Trust your bloody partner, Joshua (I say, with all the love in my heart for this Joshua and this poor beleaguered but incredibly stubborn Neku and the all the game mechanics and worldbuilding in this series). Also, the latest cliffhanger is killing me but I'm ready to see Joshua go absolutely feral on anyone who would dare touch his city and his partner.