#rather than a positive motion forward into advancement
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etheries1015 ¡ 9 months ago
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Returning your favor
Not forgetting your kind gesture of giving your lover fae Lilia a back massage, he decides to return the favor. With a bit of a...mischievous and dirty twist. 18+ MINORS DNI
General warnings: Gender Neutral reader
Based off of giving him a back massage I wrote -> HERE. For all my people who have told me they also have back issues, no worries, your favorite fae is here to save the day <3 (Looking at you, @masquerade-of-misery )
"Scented oil?" You stared dubiously at the container Lilia had handed you, a proud smile plastered upon his face with his signature smirk in tow.
"Your favorite scent, might I add!" He folded his arms, floating above you turning upside down where his gaze met yours. You gave him a curious look, Lilia planting a kiss on your forehead in response to your suspicion and pressing the tip of his nose against yours.
"Aren't you curious to try it? I know I've been dying to ever since Kalim brought it back from his homeland! Read it, it's supposed to make your skin feel incredibly soft and supple and relaxed..."
"So you want me to give you a back massage with this oil?" Lilia quirked an eyebrow and flipped his position to be upright, sitting against the ground on his knees and peering into your eyes.
"Of course not. You already did that for me, and now it's my turn to show you how to properly give a massage. I've been dying to see you all slippery, anyways." He winked and took the oil out of your hands, gesturing you to lay on the bed of his room. You eyed him curiously before sighing, admitting to him you have been feeling sore yourself as of late.
"And do you expect me to place this on your clothing? Hurry now, take them off my little bat," Lilia smiled at you with a twinkle of trouble in his ruby orbs. You obeyed willingly, rendering your top half completely bare and laying stomach down. Lilia made his way on top of your body, straddling your back before adding a generous dallop of the oil in his hands clicking the lid shut and setting it to the side in reach for easy access.
The moment the liquid hit your back with his rather rough touch, you felt a shiver down your spine as the smooth oil dripped from his hands onto your skin. Lilia had a rather aggressive way of messaging your back, despite the oil making it slicker and his hands run smoother along your skin. It was relaxing as the fragrance filled your nose, taking in every movement of Lilias fingers as he worked his way from your shoulders down to the blades. He felt every muscle and bone with his fingers, using his palms and thumb to move an upward circular motion to ease out the strain in your muscle.
"Ohh..." You groaned, "you're good at this," humming in pleasure your eyes fluttered shut and head flopped down completely exhausted. You savored ever single movement of his dexterous fingers as they made their way down to the center of your back, coating your skin with the oil...before sneaky slippery hands sensually rubbed their way from your back, to more unnecessary territory. He pressed himself against you slightly, his hands roaming to the front of your body easily able to squeeze between the softness of the bed to the tender flesh of your chest. As much as you wanted to tease him and tell your lover off about his perverted advances, you couldnt help but melt beneath his touch and give into the moment.
Lilia leaned forward to bite your neck, an excitable mewl freeing from your parted lips. He smirked against your skin and pinched your nipple much to your surprise, before quickly removing his hands from your chest and sitting back up against your bottom to have access to the full of your back once more. You almost complained about the absence of his playful hands, before hearing the opening of the bottle once more and his cool hands return to the center of your back. He was taking it much more serious than you'd expect, pinching your spine while occasionally slicking his hands back up to your back and shoulders, as if playing around with the flimsly liquid that gave him such easy and smooth access to your extremities.
"Were you doing that to tease me?" You finally spoke up tiredly, attempting not to fall asleep at the comfort of his touch. Lilia hummed in response with a chuckle beneath his throat.
"Whatever do you mean, my little bat?" You could feel the playful squinted eyes and toothy grin he typically painted when teasing you, causing you to roll your eyes and scoff. When he realized you weren't going to play into his game, the fae moved his deep message down right above the hem of your pants, strongly using his thumb to rub circles the sides of your tailbone. You felt your face grow mildly hot as his hands began to tug down your pants indiscreetly, shuffling his body down your legs to make room for his intended target. Knowing what he was doing and going with the flow of his touches, you felt yourself lift your ass to better grant him the ability to pull your pants and underwear the rest of the way down.
"Eager, aren't we? Are you sore down here, too?" He quirked an eyebrow. Although his words were teasing, his hands did not halt from assisting the remaining of your garments and slipping them onto the floor. You began to lift your head to complain about his endless teasing, however you were quickly silenced by the sound of the opening container once again and cold oil and his strong hands hitting your ass with a bit of a smack. You yelped at this before the light stinging was replaced with a honeyed chuckle and gentle caresses.
Using his hands, Lilia gently spread your legs and began working the oil to your inner thighs, sweet hums of pleasure leaving him smiling fondly down at your relaxed body. It was sudden when the warmth and slickness of his hands were removed from your skin, the sound of clothed being removed and tossed to the floor grabbing your attention along with the unbuckling of pants following suit. Your eyebrows raised at this incredibly sudden turn of events, propping yourself up on your elbows and turning to see a now naked Lilia.
"And just what do you think you're doing?" You teased, a smile crawling onto your lips. Lilia leaned forward, crawling over your body twisting his head to give you a chaste kiss as his hands began to gently rub once more from your back to your chest, the way you propped your upper half giving him much easier and more sensual access to the rest of you. "Weren't you supposed to be helping me ease more soreness, rather than make it worse?" Lilias fingers tenderly groped at whatever flesh he could, almost in a desperate yet surprisingly docile way.
"Then I'll just have to give you another massage, won't I?" He bit your neck once again, something that wasn't unfamiliar to you especially in the context of love making.
"That ruined the point of the oil a little bit, didnt it?" You chuckled. He knew you were jist teasing, the way your body trembled in anticipation told him all he needed. You could feel the throbbing of his cock press against your ass, Lilia whimpering while moving his hips almost as if begging to be inside of you.
"I promise to make it up to you...but seeing you under my touch like this..." His breath hitched, moving his hand to guide the tip of his cock to your entrance, "I need to feel you around me, now."
"And I'm not stopping until we are both covered in this oil, my precious bat."
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ohnococo ¡ 9 months ago
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How To Fight | MMA Fighter!Toji x Physical Therapist!Reader
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You love your job as a Physical Therapist, and would rather avoid any complications. Unfortunately MMA Fighter Toji Fushiguro has taken a liking to you. Despite your better judgement, you've taken a liking to him too.
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✧ wc: 6.3k
✧ notes: A song fic taking place in the MMA AU. The song lyrics referenced are from How To Fight by Eartheater
✧ warnings: eventual angst, mma!au, no curse au, widowed Toji, divorced Toji, single dad Toji, fem bodied reader, pronouns used (she/her), pet names (sweetheart), flirting, unwanted advances, pussy referred to as 'she', physical therapist reader, recurring injury, injury recovery, vaginal sex, cumshot
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i've tasted metals of my own blood, and learned to like it
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“We’ve got to stop meeting like this.”
It was against everything you stood for to be happy to see a client again, given your line of work, but Toji was different. Against your better judgement, he had somehow managed to work his way into your mind, burrowing past that steely wall of professionalism you kept up at all times with those in your care. You were determined to never let him know that, though.
“Well, Toji, I would prefer it if you didn’t keep getting yourself injured.”
He breezes right past that. “Just let me take you out, it’ll be a lot nicer than pushing me around and cracking my joints.”
It was a simplification bordering on misunderstanding your work, as if you were some chiropractor, but you know he’s only saying it to get you shoving him around with that tinge of annoyance he feeds right into your veins. You try not to give in, because you’re always trying not to give in to Toji, really. Then he’s resisting, just enough to make you really have to work to guide him in the stretch you want him to do, and he’s managed to get you right where he wants you yet again. You tug at his hips, guiding him into movements he should be familiar with by now.
“Just let me do my job.”
You had no intention of accepting his advances, whether they were in the form of invitations to dinner, sparkling bedroom eyes, or flirtatious comments that would have had you kicking anyone else right out of your office. Not Toji, though. With him, you just find yourself slowly allowing him to speak to you more and more familiarly.
The corner of his mouth lifts smugly just as he’s turning away, taking his gaze off of you directly to watch you in the mirror along the wall next to the mat you were standing on. He allows you to move him for a moment, only offering light resistance now, as if you could truly make him do anything he didn’t want to, then continues the twisting motion on his own. You watch his body carefully, avoiding eye contact because you already know those green eyes are fixed on your face, trying to coax you into giving him the smallest inch to turn into a mile.
“If you want your hands on me you don’t gotta use your job as an excuse.”
You ignore him outright, drowning out any potentially untoward thoughts with a strengthened focus on your work. As always, it works, and you note on your assessment forms that his hip mobility was normal. You knew it would be, that Toji knew how to throw his punches properly, but you’re always thorough with your checklist whether it was for the reasons Toji accused you of or not.
“Stand against the wall.”
He lets out a whistle, hands up as he does, “Gonna frisk me?”
“I’m gonna refer you to Yaga so you can get wrung out like a wet rag if you don’t do what I tell you.”
“Ooh, that doesn’t sound too bad, actually.”
“Toji.”
He chuckles as he settles into the position he already knows you want him in, doing lunges with the wall as a marker for how deep to press forward as you watch his ankle and knee movements.
“All good there.” You tap his back, nodding as you make your notes while he stands in wait.
“Okay, upper body.”
You know this is where he’ll need the work, as usual, and you’re quick to go through your checks with the right shoulder, moving onto his problem area. You already knew from his post-fight medical, but are happy to find, as you watch his movements as he lifts and rotates his arm, that it’s no more serious than the last time.
“Left shoulder…” you say aloud as you note it.
He looks annoyed, at himself rather than at you, “Always is.”
It makes you feel bad for him, in a way. He wasn’t really reckless in the ring. He knew his body too well and was too calculated with how he approached his fights. Unfortunately, it was simply a recurring injury, as shoulder issues often were. Something that was always going to pop back up sooner or later, but with the way Toji took so many fights even as he neared his forties it seemed to be “sooner” more and more often.
As you rotate his arm, feeling where he tenses and softening your movements, you share a little of your optimism with him - couched in realism, of course.
“Don’t look so sad. It’s similar to the last one, so it shouldn’t be too long before we have you out there in the ring living your best life.”
He laughs at that, sounding a little dryer than his usual flirty chuckle, “I’m not living my best life in there.”
You glance up at him while you continue your assessment, brows raising in muted interest before he continues.
“Put it this way, I like it because I like the money. I don’t love fighting.” He thinks on it a little more before adding, “I do love finishing fights, though.”
To you, there was little difference between those two things, but then you weren’t the one doing the fighting so you accept his feelings on the matter. “That’s fair. I think it’s kind of rare to really love your job.”
As you firmly grasp his bicep, lifting his arm outwards, he flexes for just a moment, grin returning to its usual wolfish state, “Bet you love your job though. Groping men all day.”
You release his arm, letting it fall for only a moment, but catching it as soon as he winces, “I’d love it a lot more if you let me do it without those kinds of comments.”
“Ehh,” he tilts his head, brows raising in disbelief at your continued assertions that you didn’t get any sort of satisfaction out of this (and you didn’t… until him). “I think you get something out of them.”
You ignore him again, returning to your desk to note your recommendations. “Four to six weeks of sessions, as usual.” You look up at him then, indirectly threatening him to behave, “Four will probably do though.”
It shouldn’t have been a threat, getting him back up to snuff as efficiently as possible, but it had become one by now with Toji. It was a joke, of course. Toji would feign being hurt by the thought of it, but was always happy to be able to accept his next fight as soon as possible.
But sometimes it didn’t feel like a joke. Sometimes you did want a little more time basking in his flirtations. Toji Fushiguro had unfortunately grown on you and it often left you feeling ashamed. His reputation precedes him. He’d even been married when he first came into your office, and here you were worrying about missing those butterflies in your stomach at his little reminders that he is completely fixated on you.
When you find yourself smiling a little too widely at him, or even thinking about him outside of your sessions, you have to remind yourself that there was nothing actually there. It was just what he was like with anyone that caught his eye, even if it was only ever you he was assigned to once you’d started working there.
The why of it all wasn’t a mystery in the beginning. He was a relentless flirt that, based on how cagey some of your coworkers were about hearing he would be in your care, had apparently enjoyed his time with many of them before you. You didn’t mess around about your job, though. You loved your work, and you loved the convenience of this position, so you’d decided that you absolutely would not be added to his list of conquests.
At first keeping that professional level of disinterest was easy. It had seemed so obvious that he’d move on and request another PT work with him after the first of his recurring injuries led to several sessions worth of you rejecting his advances. That wasn’t the case, though. Maybe that was exactly why he kept coming to you and only you. The challenge.
And it was a challenge, for the both of you. You were intent on giving him nothing, and he was intent at making that as hard as possible for you without even really trying. By the third time he’s booked in for several sessions with you for post-fight recovery, you find yourself actually letting your guard down around him, if only a little. You might have even missed him.
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i've gone under the knife of love, dissected every vein and vessel
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Another week, another therapy session, another attempt to keep your composure, even with how relentless Toji is.
“How long are you gonna keep making me ask before you let me take you to dinner?”
You shoot him a look. The answer should be never, followed by asserting quite bluntly that you don’t sleep with clients, since he wasn’t exactly being subtle. That’s what the answer used to be, at least. It’s not quite that direct now, though. “How long are you going to keep getting yourself injured and winding up here?”
He puts his hand to his heart, feigning pain, “Listen, if I didn’t have a bum shoulder I wouldn’t get to come and be your favourite client.”
“I wouldn’t say favourite.”
He lifts his head from your massage table, flashing you a winning smile and the closest to puppy dog eyes a man like Toji could muster. “Cutest?”
“I wouldn’t say that either.”
He closes his eyes, relaxing onto your table as you move and massage his shoulder firmly, “Whatever you say, sweetheart…”
Toji really did enjoy testing you. Especially with his favourite little pet name for you. Sweetheart. ’Even though you’re not too sweet to me’ he’d said with a little pout, entirely undercut by his hungry eyes. You used to shoot him looks that could have killed a man on the spot in some other universe. Now you don’t look at him at all when he says it, it feels too risky. It feels like something in your eyes will give you away.
You throw out another of the many threats Toji knows are baseless by now, said as many times and with as little conviction as most of your defences against him. “You’re lucky I don’t kick you out.”
He peeks at you through barely opened eyes, as you stretch his arm outward, “That's what I’m saying, you’ve got a soft spot for me.”
That’s your final signal to put your proverbial work hat on a little more snugly as you push down, and he taps his fingers against you, indicating his limit for this particular stretch. He understands you’re truly done with the conversation as you pat his side and step back.
“Alright, time for strengthening exercises.”
This was the part he always got bored with. You weren’t touching him now, not after the first time to demonstrate what you wanted from him. You weren’t naive enough to believe him when he kept feigning a need for more hands-on guidance as he goes through the recommended motions. A man doesn’t get to the point of looking like Toji without knowing how to lift weights - especially not the small ones you had him on just to slowly get his strength back in his shoulder.
Even then, lying on the floor, raising a little 5 pound weight with his healing arm while you stand above him watching closely, he’s still ready to run his mouth.
“I like this.”
“It feels alright?”
“The weight is fine, but I like having you standing over me like that.”
You give him nothing, pursing your lips as you put the tip of your shoes between his arm and the ground, “Keep your arm up, don’t bring it down too far.”
Ignoring his comments is the best you can do sometimes. Even if it gets harder with every session as you start to actually look forward to it deep down. Even if it becomes your only defence until you’re spending a good chunk of these sessions in a near haze, trying to force as much emotional distance as possible once his flirting starts up.
His comments were uncalled for, and so was the way it made you feel. You were far from the type to be desperate for the attention of a man like him, and the way your body responded to him only pissed you off the more it excited you. All you can do, or all you’re willing to do, is shut it down, and remember that you have a job to do.
—
After three more sessions of this you’ve convinced yourself that you’re more than ready to discharge him and hopefully enjoy a peaceful several months without the risk of seeing his face again. The fact that it never used to take convincing to enjoy having the walking talking complication out of your life is something you aren’t willing to address.
“You’re gonna miss me, aren’t you?”
“Don’t start, Toji.”
You know you can’t really tell him what to do, unfortunately.
“You don’t have to if you-“
“That’s right, I don’t have to miss you, and I won’t. Hopefully you don’t go getting yourself injured again so you can come and bother me more.”
Your tone has him sucking in air through his teeth and grimacing a little.
“I don’t exactly like getting injured.” He looks away as he speaks and it’s strange not having his eyes on you like you were some sort of prey to be carefully observed. “I couldn’t even help my son move into his dorm. Cage fighter dad that can’t even lift a fucking box. It pisses me off.”
He shrugs, eyes back on you, lit up anew, “But at least I get to see your pretty face, huh?”
As much as you don’t enjoy Toji’s comments, you like these little glimpses of something else even less. Because he does talk to you. About his day, about little things that pop in his head when he’s bored of flirting for seconds at a time. And it makes it much harder not to get a little too attached when he isn’t just being a simple womaniser.
It sometimes makes you feel like Toji thinks you’re some sort of therapist - when he’s not relentlessly trying to get you into his bed. And you know that’s what all of his flirting is, of course.
Because his reputation precedes him. Yes, he’ll take someone out. Yes, they’ll have a good time. Yes, they’ll fuck. Except in your case you aren’t a part time receptionist or ring girl that might be able to avoid awkward situations with him during the nothing that comes after all of that. And you aren’t willing to mess up the good thing you have with your job, even though some of your coworkers seemed to be.
What wasn't mentioned to you as part of his reputation, was the little breadcrumbs of who he was beneath the charm and muscle. It’s known he was a prodigy in his sport. It’s known he retired young to be a family man. And it’s known he came back, 5 years later, newly widowed.
He doesn’t talk about his first wife much, because why would he? Any brief mentions of her are with an undying warmth and love that undercuts his reputation as a heartbreaker. She’s special. The mother of his child, his first love. The former is stated, the latter is obvious. Nothing short of that would melt that hardened mask of indifference.
His second wife, he doesn’t speak about at all. You only know of her because he mentions a step-daughter, and because when he’d flirted with you from the very first time he’d entered your care your eyes had locked onto the ring on his finger with contempt for how little it apparently meant. By the time you see him next, nearly half a year and another injury later, he isn’t wearing the ring anymore.
Something in you feels flattered when you ask Toji about how his son was finding college in front of a coworker who had been here much longer than you, and they’re shocked as they say they didn’t know he had kids. Then, you’re left even more annoyed at him for giving you more complications to maintaining a necessary level of professional distance in your job.
Small talk shouldn’t feel so heavy.
Helping people recover shouldn’t make you have to deal with these thoughts.
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i know how to fight, how to fuck, how to die, how to resurrect my pride
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When you give in, it’s in the worst way. He doesn’t even take you to dinner, you don’t give him a chance to. It’s his fourth time in your care, this time for an ankle injury. Something basic, something much more simple to deal with than his recurring problem. Something that will get him out of your hair in no time.
He isn’t simple to deal with though, telling you about the dogs his son adopted, how he never really got how people got so attached to animals growing up, but now he gets it. He’s got you comfortable, not even thinking about how your guard is down, nor about how you even smile at him as he shows you a picture of his son, buried under two masses of fluff and begrudgingly smiling at the camera.
“God, Toji, you really just have a little twin there, don’t you?”
He laughs, looking at the picture of his son, before setting his phone aside on the mat. “Nah, there’s a lot of his mom in there.”
You smile, patting his shoulder in a rare touch outside of professional reasons, “That’s nice.”
He lies back on the mat, out of your reach, “You’re nice, for once.”
You get back to work, wrapping your hands around his ankle and bending his foot slowly. “I’m nice to people who aren’t constantly trying to get into my pants.”
“Hey, who said I was trying to do that? I’m just trying to take you out.” He sits up and leans onto his elbows, “but if that’s the kind of thing you’re interested in…”
“I’m interested in doing my job. I don’t mind talking to you when you relax with the inappropriate comments.”
“I’ve gotta prove myself to you before you’ll let me take you out, got it.”
“Is that what I said, Toji?”
Toji shrugs, fully relaxing back onto his elbows, and you pull on his foot gently. “That’s what I heard.”
You shoot him a look that you hope can put fear into the heart of even him. Instead, it only seems to inspire other emotions as he forms his scarred lips into a pout that misses the mark of garnering pity for his plight as a man rejected yet again, though you’re certain Toji knows exactly what he’s doing when he makes faces like that. Even with his lips puckered and sticking out slightly, even with his brows fashioned into a worried frown, his eyes telegraph exactly what he’s thinking about.
It crumbles your resolve, leaving you looking away first as you let out a sigh you hope comes across as frustration instead of weakness. You readjust your position squatting down next to him on the mat, trying to get a feel for the flexibility of his ankle before you start guiding him through putting some of his weight onto it as he straightens the other leg and lifts his hips off the mat before settling back down.
He’s quiet then, for much longer than you were used to, and you take the silence as an opportunity to work in peace as you rotate his foot again. When you look back up at him it has your heart beating a little faster than it should be. His teeth press lightly at his lower lip, his eyelids are only half open, and his brow quirks as if just your look had the same effect as having said something dirty.
“What is it now?”
You expect him to make some comment about your hands on his body, how they were lingering even now. He makes you wait for it though, tilting his head from one side to the other as he looks you up and down, smiling like he has a secret he’s debating keeping.
Another sigh falls from your lips, filled with actual frustration this time, and when he sits up it feels like he’s towering over you in a way you simply could not overcome, despite being able to easily stand and remove yourself from the pull of his gaze. The way he peers at you, even more intense than usual, has the back of your neck tingling and you’re forced to swallow hard even with the fear that something as simple as that would give you away.
His gaze softens, dipping back into something cooler, as if he’s backing away from an animal signalling that an approach would not be treated kindly. He takes a deep breath, and you don’t even notice you’re following suit until you both exhale at the same time.
It’s as if he’s settling whatever that moment was with just a look, deciding not to make the final jump to cross that imaginary line, and it puts you at ease enough that his words are like a punch to the gut.
“You’re pretending you don’t like it, but your neck is doing that thing.”
“What? What are you talking about?” You’re blowing it, far too defensive even though you truly aren’t actually sure what he means.
“Here.” He brings a hand to your neck, tracing a finger down the length of it, stopping just above your collarbones. “You always tense riiiiight there.”
He pulls his hand back, settling it on his thigh, and you let out the breath you’d been holding from the moment his hands were coming towards you. It makes you realise you’d been so focused on controlling everything you did or said that you’d been clenching yourself like a fist every time his words, or actions, left you melting inside. It also makes you realise that was the first time he’d put his hands on you in a way entirely unrelated to your work since he shook your hand the day you’d met.
You’re horrified at having been found out. You’re even more horrified as you realise you hadn’t really been hiding anything anyway. It’s left you with no clue how to respond, and you suddenly feel so aware of your every movement, unable to decipher how to behave when your little act had been so, so obvious to him from the start.
“Look, if you really want me to stop, I’ll st-“ he pauses, looking up as he thinks, scrunching his nose and tilting his head as if he’s weighing options. “Well, I’ll try to stop. I can’t make any promises…”
He’s pausing again, thinking again, looking you up and down as he licks his lips, before he crosses his legs, pulling his ankle out of your grasp and resting his elbows on his thighs as he leans forward. It forces you to react, as if on instinct, and lean back off of your feet to seat yourself with knees raised and acting as a final barrier between the two of you. He lets you keep that distance you’d gained, but brings a hand to hover over your knee so closely that you’re not sure if he’s touched you yet or if it’s just the heat radiating off of him setting your nerves on fire.
You can’t even bring your eyes away from his to check, and realise that you wouldn’t exactly want to move further away whether his touch was real or imagined. His gaze has you locked in place just as much as your own head as you find yourself thoroughly buried in your own pit of uncertainty as everything moves too fast for your mind to catch up.
“You don’t want me to stop though, do you sweetheart?”
His eyes, the heat of him, his low words digging through that pit in your stomach to reach for your core, it all has you feeling too lightheaded to be able to think at all. You can barely even feel yourself shaking your head, body much more honest than you had been willing to be all this time.
“Thought so.”
He leans in, brushing his nose back and forth against yours, smiling with the cute gesture, then that grin spreads wider as you tilt your head, your eyes fluttering closed as you wait for him to just kiss you. He doesn’t, waiting long enough that you’re forced to open your eyes and confront the sight of that hungry face yet again, and this time his gaze has you outright clenching.
“Big girls don’t get what they want by acting all shy, do they?”
It’s too much, you feel humiliated, you feel sick, you feel like you’ll pass out if he keeps working you up without even putting his hands on you properly.
“Kiss me. If you wanna.”
You don’t know who you are, needing to be told what to do like this. You question who you are again, as you follow orders in a way you never would have before you’d been called out like this and press your lips to his, letting out a breath that’s shaky enough to have you revealing just how desperate you were. When you start to wonder who you are for the third time, for kissing a client, at work no less, you drown out that thought by parting your lips against his.
He responds with softly parted lips of his own, wrapping his arms around your waist, pulling you into him as he slots his mouth against yours. You wait for his tongue, flitting the tip of yours against his lower lip, and when it does not come you’re clinging to his shirt, bunching it at his shoulders. You’re forced to hold onto those broad shoulders properly when he lies back and his hands on your waist bring you with him to settle you on top of him - wordlessly reiterating that you would need to pull yourself together and set the pace here.
It’s your final push, as you straddle him with hands braced against his chest and slide your tongue into his mouth. Feeling the body you’d had your hands on far too many times, this time beneath you and with your ability to lie to yourself about the effect it has on you stripped away, has you salivating. You set all shame aside for this moment as you grind down against him, indulging in the feel of his stiffening cock beneath layers of thin fabric.
That tense feeling threatens to return, prickling at the back of your neck as he laughs into your mouth, sliding his tongue against yours and guiding your movements against him with strong hands on your hips. It’s gone again as he lifts his hips gently, using your weight against you as you only press harder onto him. You squeeze at his pecs, groaning into his mouth as you finally goad him into kissing you back with the same intensity you were now pouring into him, and it’s as delightfully invasive as you’d tried your hardest not to imagine it would be time and time again. It sends a tremble through your thighs, the wetness pooling in your panties all too obvious to you as all of your hidden desperation pulses through you straight from your pussy.
You forget yourself while kissing him like this, unaware of how long you’ve been on top of him, unaware of how you were moaning outright with just the friction between you, unaware of anything but feeling and tasting and touching as much of Toji as you could.
He’s aware though, aware of everything just as he always has been. How your thighs squeeze at his hips, the way your moans start sounding more like breathy little whines, how your tongue stops moving for seconds at a time against his. And it’s all he needs to keep this momentum going so quickly that everything but the two of you is an unintelligible blur.
“You gonna cum just like this?”
You don’t really want to answer it, and the look you give him as you try to keep him kissing you rather than talking has him chuckling, light and breathy against your skin.
“Sweetheart… if you’d just let me take you out from the beginning you wouldn’t be so pent up and begging for it…”
It takes more concentration than you have available to you right now to steady your voice. “I’m not begging.”
He takes in your face, biting at his lower lip as he slides two fingers into your mouth. He wiggles them around, sliding over your tongue, practically fucking your mouth with those thick fingers, knuckles catching at your tightened lips. “You aren’t…”
His fingers leave your mouth just as you were starting to actually enjoy the intrusion, and he slips his hands into your leggings, past your panties, stopping you from pressing down against his clothed cock like you had been as he circles your entrance slowly, “but she is.”
Then, his hand is gone, resecured on your hips, steadying your movements. “But you’re the boss here, not her. So if you don’t want it…”
“Come on, Toji.” You’re chastising him, even if you’re in no position to do so with your thighs tensing and your hips begging to keep moving against him.
He clicks his tongue against his teeth, “Like I said, you’re the boss. So I don’t move without orders.”
And he doesn’t. He doesn’t keep kissing you, even when you press your lips against his again, sighing out your frustration against his soft smile. He doesn’t release your hips to let you keep stoking your fire on his body. He doesn’t do anything but look up at you with a hungry glint in his eye, enjoying every moment it takes you to push your pride aside to ask him for exactly what you’ve wanted longer than you can admit to yourself.
“I want to cum.”
“Just you? Not a very good boss, huh…”
You groan, frustration with him reaching a fever pitch, “I want you to fuck me.”
He closes his eyes, smiling wide and letting your words wash over him. It’s music to his ears, and when he looks back up at you his pupils are blown and you know he’s done holding back. “All you had to do was ask, sweetheart.”
His arm is around your waist then, keeping you steady as rolls you over, settling himself between your thighs and you’re now looking up at him. You feel the tensing of his body, and come back to yourself enough to give him a concerned look.
He catches it, pressing a hand to your cheek and rubbing his thumb over your lips in an attempt to soothe those worries.
“Shh, don’t worry, I’ll be careful.” He shifts so he’s not putting weight onto his ankle, pulling at your shoes until they’re sliding off and hitting the ground. You lift your hips as you work your own leggings and underwear down, straightening your legs for him to remove them for you before he’s spreading you wide with hands on your inner thighs. He slides a hand towards your pussy, rubbing his thumb through your wetness and sucking air through his teeth at the way it slips around with ease.
“You really were gonna cum like that, weren’t you?”
You run your hands over your face, unwilling to endure any more teasing, “Just fuck me, Toji.”
He whistles, releasing your thighs and tugging the waistband of his shorts down just enough to release his cock, and you look up to his face, refusing to give him a reaction until he’s sliding inside you just as you’ve asked. He braces himself on one of his elbows, leaning over you and letting his cock hang heavily against your stomach. His hair tickles at your face as he kisses you again before requesting a final affirmation before following the orders you’d given.
“Want me to go slow?”
He really does wear your patience thin, enough that you answer without thinking, “No.”
“Okay…” he sounds doubtful, but continues on as he grips himself at the base and rubs the head of his cock through your wetness.
You squeeze at his sides, prompting him to look at you instead of at his own cock below. “Do not cum inside me.”
It’s stern enough to make Toji laugh, your voice sounding much more like your usual self for just a moment. “Don’t worry, I don’t want any more responsibilities.”
You don’t know if you trust Toji, but right now you don’t exactly trust yourself either. Especially not when having this man you’d spent ages closing yourself off to split you open on his cock in one merciless push has you wincing and taking it like it was exactly what you deserved for being so weak to him.
Toji pauses, balls deep, eyes clouded as he looks down at you. “I asked if you wanted me to go slow.”
It’s said with a hint of pity and a look that says ’you did this to yourself’, though he does stay still, kissing you again and removing your need to try and collect your thoughts enough to reassert that you knew your body, not him.
He doesn’t hold back for long though, and once you’re sighing into his mouth again, your tongue’s movements sloppy and unfocused, he starts moving his hips slowly. He starts with shallow thrusts, hips barely leaving yours. Then, as your body relaxes and your pussy accommodates him with a telltale squelch, he pulls out further, fucking you harder. Once your thighs are gripping at his hips he sits up, gathering more momentum in his thrusts at the slight change of angle.
He presses his hand to your abdomen, thumb making out a steady pace on your clit as his hips make angled thrusts that have his cock working at you with purpose. The moan it draws from you is punctuated with your eyes rolling, trying desperately to refocus on the face of the man above you. He bites at his lip, nodding and groaning at the feel of you tightening as he finds the movements that have your hands trying to grip at something below, but only meeting the dull squeak of your fingertips sliding against the mat. He leans back, reaching up to grab at the back of the collar of his shirt and tug it over his head, tossing it aside. He grasps both of your wrists firmly, pulling your hands up to rest against his stomach as he looks down at you with a challenge in his eyes.
“C’mon, touch me.” He smiles, wide and wicked, “Like you’ve always wanted to.”
You do just that, running your hands over his abs, grazing your thumb over his belly button, tracing your fingers along the prominent vein on his abdomen that leads down below to where the two of you are connected. Then, your hands travel back upwards, gripping at his pecs. His hand returns to press at you, thumb back to playing with your swollen clit, and having that touch back so suddenly has you squeezing Toji’s pecs hard, drawing a moan from him.
“There you go.” It adds even more enthusiasm to his thrusts, speed picking up as he leans over you, propping himself up on one hand as he digs deep to have you squeezing him again.
This time your touch is intentional as you squeeze at the flesh, a slight give present before you reach hardened muscle, and when you graze your nails over his nipples he’s shivering above you, bucking into you harder. The way he rubs at your clit is almost mechanical in its precise speed and pacing, a steady climb punctuated by those thrusts that stroke your insides in a way that makes your body tingle and your toes curl.
“That easy, huh?”
The audacity helps you lock eyes on him, if only for a moment, and while his smug smile builds a small fury at the back of your mind, your receive vindication in the flutter of his lashes and slight twitch of his upper lip as he tries to ignore the call of his tightening balls. It gives you what you need to dig deep, rocking your hips up into his thrusts, unearthing the orgasm just below the surface for the both of you.
You find yours first, putting your trust in Toji as you let go and bounce into him as it rips through you white hot and powerful enough to have you curling in on yourself, head buried against Toji’s chest and legs clamping him until his hips are pressed to yours. He pushes past even the strength of your legs and pulsing pussy, thrusting until you release him, lying back, and your head has barely hit the mat below before he’s pulling out.
“Fuck…” it’s hissed out as he sits up and jerks at his cock roughly, head falling back while his hips buck up and into his fist. His cum spatters down, first landing on your shirt until you tug it up, hopeless as the task was with your clothes already ruined, and take the rest of it onto your bare stomach.
He’s left panting, you’re left panting. He looks like he’s won at something, you feel like you’ve lost.
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seafoamreadings ¡ 8 months ago
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week of april 21st, 2024
these are written predominantly for the *rising* signs but they are also intuitively "channeled" enough that they should work for any dominant energy you have! (try your sun if you don't know rising, or more advanced readers can try moon, anywhere you have a stellium, etc and see what works best for you!)
aries: the biggest astrological news of your week is the end of mercury retrograde right in the middle of your sign. you can still anticipate a little bit of shenanigans for a few days afterward since it is so close to home for you, but from here on out a little peaceful normalcy re-enters your life. if you need more chaos it'll have to be the kind you make for yourself.
taurus: aries antics are not yet at an end but in many ways your sign now becomes the star of the show. on some levels this will be quite fun for you, especially if you thrive under positive attention from others. on other levels, the shifts and changes can be overwhelming to your stolid and stable sign. try to be surprised and delighted rather than shocked and dismayed. it's probably not all so bad and if it is, you will prevail.
gemini: the end of a mercury retrograde is always good news for a gemini. your mind clears where there was recently any brain fog or fuzziness. the fumbling and bumbling shifts back to your natural willowy gracefulness. other things are going on this week too but this is the biggest relief for you.
cancerians: mercury retrograde has been hard for the cardinal signs like you, but its end this week is a breath of fresh air. meanwhile a full scorpio moon can also help you recharge any intellectual or mental fatigue you have been experiencing lately, but do expect to be in your feelings a bit about it. not that that's a bad thing, no matter what some might say. it is one of your gifts, how deeply you can feel.
leo: you'll have a lot of strong feelings early on this week but by the weekend your head and heart are much clearer. physical exercise benefits you, so head to a gym or just have a little nice gallivanting outdoors.
virgo: the more mercurial virgoans will feel great relief as mercury goes direct at last. but don't jump in too quickly to any contracts or sharing resources. less mercurial virgoans will be more focused on mars-neptune in pisces, bringing some illusions (or disillusionment) to relationships. emilie du chatelet said our happiness depends on our illusions, so it is ok to embrace them to some degree, but don't let anyone lie to you or do you harm.
libra: this week's astrology portends mainly good things (although also shifting things) in your relationships, perhaps some delusion or manipulation occurring in some routine or place of work, and a full moon involving your money. if you've been financially wise and responsible, this could be great news. if you've let your luxurious venusian tendencies get the better of you recently, perhaps less great.
scorpio: you may find yourself saying mercury schmercury to the folks hyped up about mercury retrograde this week, but it's mostly due to the full moon that occurs in your sign shortly beforehand. your daily routines run smoother than ever but your emotions are heated and overflowing. don't try to cram it down. let it out, in private if need be.
sagittarius: mercury direct again may well herald a creative breakthrough. or, perhaps juicier, a new relationship or fling. or even an affair, if you're that kind of sagittarian.
capricorn: your sign and your cardinal brethren will certainly feel a relief of some tension or disarray as mercury resumes forward motion this week. the first half of the week is also a great time for you to socialize, if you have the time!
aquarius: almost for sure, you'll receive some sort of important or, at minimum, 'interesting' message around the time that mercury ends its retrograde this week. and before that/at the same time, the full moon in scorpio lights up your 10th house of status and legacy, so while you may not want to be out there posting any serious news on your socials, it's ok to take credit for work well done.
pisces: if you can, avoid spending money (especially on anything important) until next week. on the other hand, academic pursuits get a major boost and if you're not an academic, at least get philosophical about something close to your heart. by the end of the week a mars-neptune conjunction gives you energy, although perhaps not of the physical sort. avoid lying to yourself or others.
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lustastarte ¡ 2 years ago
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♥ cabin | diegyjo ♥
genre: smut
heavy rain forces gyjo to room with diego for the night
published: 2020
!genderbent johnny!
written by request
"Shit, it's raining."
Joana sighed, wrapping her arms around Slow Dancer's neck for any form of heat. "Gyro, the more you talk, the more body heat you lose. Let's just find somewhere out of the rain to stay."
"We're twenty miles outside of the nearest town, Jojo."
"Surely there's somewhere we can stay- Who's that?" 
Joana squinted her eyes, pointing to an advancing figure in the distance, identity masked by heavy rainfall and darkness.
"Who's there?" No answer.
"Hey! Who are you?" Gyro signaled Valkyrie to move forward. Joana held tightly to Slow Dancer's reigns, ready to turn and flee if need be. 
"Zeppeli? Joestar? Is that you?"
"Diego?"
He came ever closer, teal sweater showing through the rain. "Why are you guys out here?"
"Why do you wanna kn-?"
"We were traveling, but now we're trying to find somewhere to stay," Joana explained, interrupting Gyro and pulling herself even closer to her trusted traveling companion, sticking her frozen nose in Slow Dancer's long, coarse mane to try to get the feeling back.
"I have room in the cabin I found earlier, it's not far from here," Diego offered, moving closer with Silver Bullet.
"Jojo, can I talk to you for a second?"
Joana turned her head and nodded at Gyro, who moved in to whisper in her ear. "Isn't it a little odd to you that your former... whatever you two were- is inviting you and your boyfriend to stay with him?"
"No, not particularly. I think he's trying to be nice, Gyro. Just because he's my old lover doesn't mean you have to be rude to him, I'd actually like if you guys could be friends-"
"Diego? NICE? Are you insane?"
"Do you want to freeze? You're welcome to stay out here, but I'm going with him," Joana hissed, teeth chattering and hands going numb from cold. 
Silver Bullet turned to guide them back to the borrowed cabin. Minutes later, Diego steered his trusty steed into a vacant storage shed behind the cabin, motioning for Gyro and Joana to do the same. After securing them inside the building, the three ran to the cabin, Gyro carrying Joana, Diego holding the door for them.
"Do you have any spare clothes? I only have boxers and one robe with me," he said after quickly shutting the door.
Joana shook her head as she was placed on the floor in front of the fireplace. "I don't have anything, it all got wet..."
"Do you want my robe then?"
"No, it's okay, I don't want you having to walk around without anything but underwear-"
"I'll be fine, you've seen it before, anyway," Diego teased, earning an annoyed grunt from Gyro. "I'd rather you be dry than me. Zeppeli, do you have extras?"
"I have sleep pants and extra boxers, I'm okay. I have a sleep shirt if you'd like it," Gyro paused, taking his soaked hat off. "It might be long though." 
Diego rolled his eyes. "That'd be great, I look good in dresses," he retorted. "You're missing out on a great view though~"
"Not in a million years," Gyro gagged, pulling the clothes out and hurdling the shirt at Diego. "We need to get out of these clothes before we get hypothermia."
"I need help," Joana muttered, a little embarrassed. "I can get my top off but not anything else..."
"Let's get a fire started real quick so when we help you, you can be warming up while we're changing," Diego suggested, weakly chucking wood into the fireplace, pulling two rocks out out of his pocket and using them to spark a flame.
The two boys came to Joana's aid, hanging up each article of clothing next to the fire. Pulled her unbuttoned shirt off her frozen shoulders, hung it up. Slid the soaked skirt off her mud-soiled, knee length shorts, hung it up. Peeled the formerly white shorts off her cold, pale legs, hung it up.
"Do you want to keep your-... you know," Diego looked away, face red, frantically searching for the robe. "Your- Your knickers on?"
Joana realized the position she was in, sitting nearly naked in front of two attractive men, unable to do anything but cover her bare chest and try to hide in her hair.
"I can't, they're wet too."
"Oh, right..." he walked over with the robe, handing it over to an extremely jealous Gyro, who lifted Joana, wrapped the robe around her shoulders, and slid it underneath her hips as Diego tugged the water-compromised boy shorts down her legs. Joana quickly covered the front of her body with the oversized garment, tying a neat bow with the securing ribbons.
"Thank you both," she said, looking up at the two men. They smiled back at her and began to undress themselves, hanging their clothes up just like they did with hers. Shirt off, hang it up. Pants off, hang them up. Boxers off, hang them up. Joana tried to keep her eyes glued to her hands as the undressed boys walked back and forth, grabbing the clothes they needed and pinning the wet ones up. Not long after, a shirtless Gyro sat down next to her, Diego and his oversized shirt drawing water from a basin to boil.
"Tea or coffee?"
"Tea, but try not to ruin it, will you?"
"It's no problem," Diego snarled through his teeth.
"Hey, that's enough you two!"
"Sorry," the two mumbled, throwing angry glances at one another.
"And If it's not too much trouble, coffee would be nice..."
He nodded, placing the kettle over the fire and sitting on the other side of her. She felt her face heat up as she flicked her eyes from one to the other. Gyro's muscular chest was one of her favorite things, but so were Diego's toned legs. She placed her face in her hands upon seeing small red dots speckling both boys. Those places were hot spots for mosquitos, and for good reason. 
"Joana? Are you okay? Your coffee's ready love."
She snapped her head back up when Diego accidentally placed a hand on her knee in an attempt to give her her coffee.
"Oh, sorry! I wasn't looking-"
"Yeah, you've been acting sketchy," Gyro observed, purposefully interrupting and taking his cup of tea from Diego with a sarcastic, but grateful nod.
"Well- I just- um..."
Gyro and Diego looked at one another in heated jealousy for a moment before realizing, their gazes softening. Diego looked at the floor as Gyro cleared his throat.
"It's okay, we- we know."
"Sorry, don't worry about me, I know this is weird enough as it is," Joana apologized, playing with her fingers. "Anyway um- It's still really cold in here..."
"Do you want to wrap up with me?"
She grinned, queueing Gyro to pull her toward him and wrap them both in a blanket he found lying around. Diego slid closer to the fire, Joana's heat now gone from his side.
"Dio?" He looked up. "Do you want to join us?"
His face flushed, burning hotter than the fire next to him. "If- um... If it's okay with Zep- Gyro," he answered, making eye contact with the other man, who nodded.
"Come here."
Diego wasted no time in making his way over there, sliding under Gyro's arm and wrapping his arm around the two. Joana pulled him closer, and Gyro pulled them both toward him.
They sat in silence for the longest time, until Joana pulled her head out of Gyro's neck.
"I'm still cold."
"We're as close as we can all get, Jojo."
"I know," she sighed. "My hands and feet are numb." She reached out to touch them so she could say she couldn't feel it. When her hand stopped moving, the two men had frozen. "Guys?"
Gyro looked at her, eyes wide. "You really c-can't feel them, huh."
"Did I hurt you? What about you, Dio?"
"I- ah, I'm great- I'm great!" He nodded furiously, ears and all becoming red again. "It's just that- well- your hands-"
She looked down, face mimicking Diego's. She lifted her hand. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to touch your thigh, Gyro, did I get your-? Shit! I'm so so sorry-"
"It's okay, it's not like you haven't touched us before."
"Yeah but- I just- And now- I'm so sorry."
"It's fine, love," Diego muttered. "We can fix it, you didn't break us or anything."
"Yeah, we'll be okay."
"I'll fix it, I feel bad!"
"Do you know what we're talking abo-?"
"Yes. I wanna help."
Diego shook his head. "You can help him and I'll just go to a different room, you're with him-"
"I wanna help you both."
"...W-Why?"
"Because I really like both of you... I never got you out of my head and Gyro wasn't just a rebound, I had fallen for him too..."
"Oh," they said in unison.
"It's okay if you're not okay with it, I just-"
"I'm fine with it," Gyro shyly interrupted. Diego's eyes widened. "I wouldn't mind having you both."
The British boy just nodded, mouth going dry at the Italian's comments.
"I thought-... I thought you were jealous of me?"
"I was," Gyro admitted. "Until Joana explained her feelings."
Joana's cheeks became a dusted pink shade as she fixed her robe. "Can I kiss you guys?" She leaned forward when the boys nodded, kissing them both lovingly. The three of them stared into each others' faces, their gaze becoming heated.
Gyro kissed Joana's cheek before going in for a full make out session, and Diego busied himself on her neck. She sighed in pleasure, skin chilled. Both hands, with fistfuls of hair pulled them closer, begging for more. The Italian slid her up into his lap, where she faced Diego and presented her back to him. The boys switched roles, Gyro now focused on Joana's neck and Diego fighting her tongue for dominance. She shivered when the Brit's hands slid from her waist to her hips, rubbing circles into her hips with his thumbs as the Italian's hands made their way to her small chest.
Joana whimpered into Diego's mouth, one hand trailing his body while the other pulls Gyro's hands closer to her, pushing one of his hands under the robe and onto her chest. Diego untied the ribbons so the other man could easily slip it off Joana's shoulders. She took a deep breath in as the cold air hit her pale torso. It was quickly blocked by Gyro's large hands, which massaged her breasts, and Diego's warm mouth, which covered her stomach in purple splotches. The British man looked up into the Italian's eyes for silent permission, and received it. One of Gyro's hands followed Diego's as they moved in between her legs, her stomach tying itself into knots. 
Gyro spread Joana's legs, massaging her thighs as Diego went to work with his tongue. Flattened, he drug his head from bottom to top, barely touching her and driving her wild. She may not be able to move, but she can still feel it. She doesn't know how long she'll last when he kicks it up and goes down on her the way he used to because she can't move her hips to postpone an orgasm. She whines, forcefully pulling on a fistful of Diego's yellow-blonde and Gyro's dirty blonde hair when Diego added pressure, making sure to lightly brush against her clit.
She whimpered softly, tossing her head back onto Gyro's shoulder as Diego's tongue stopped twirling around her, and he attached his mouth to her instead, sucking and kissing her clit gently as he slipped in one finger, then another almost instantly. 
"Ah, fuck," Joana took a deep breath in. "Please."
Gyro lifted an eyebrow. "Please what?"
She responded with a whine, leading Diego to slowly slide his fingers out, angling them upward as he slides back in.
"Ah- Ah," she breathed, and he curled his fingers to rub her G-spot as Gyro licked and sucked on her neck.
"Please- Please fuck m-me," she begs an hour later, after being edged over and over and teased into near madness. Diego lifted her up, holding her just long enough for Gyro to release his constrained cock. He guided himself into Joana as Diego placed her back on his lap. She was frantically cursing under her breath, head still slung over Gyro's shoulder. The Brit stood, beginning to back up.
"N-No... want you too," she gasped, sending chills down Diego's back.
"How?"
"In my mouth."
The boy's eyes darkened, and he glides over to her, shedding his boxers in the process.
When he stopped in front of her, she greedily took his cock in her mouth, moaning in surprise around him as Gyro lifted her hips and placed her back down. A hand in her hair, and hands on her hips, Joana's body tingled, sparking with excitement as they took her. She could hear Gyro's low grunts behind her and Diego's soft gasps and cursing above her, and it all went to her head.
The Italian sped up, and Joana choked on Diego, but it only turned her on even more. She swallowed around him before lifting to lick right underneath his head, making him groan and buck into her mouth.
"F-Fuck, Joana-"
She took the chance to tease him, knowing that was what gets him off. "Aww, did you miss that?"
Gyro picked his pace up once again, groaning and biting into Joana's neck and shoulder, trying to stay quiet.
Joana whined again, tangling a hand in Gyro's hair and squeezing Diego's thigh.
Diego sighed in frustration as she pulled off. "Jojo," he pouted.
"I know what I'm doing, Dio. I don't want to suck you o-off, I want you to- Ngh," she paused for a second after Gyro changed his angle. "I want you to f-fuck me too, please."
"Both of us?"
She nodded and Gyro slowed to a stop. He moaned quietly when Diego once again inserted a finger, pleasuring them both. He slipped in another two, Joana gasping his name and Gyro whispering, "God, Diego-"
Removing his fingers, he lined himself up with her hole, all three of them seeing stars as he pushed in.
"I like this position," he commented. "I get to watch both of your faces. Watch pretty little Joana get absolutely ruined, and cool Gyro lose his mind." With that, he began moving, stringing Gyro along with him. Joana cried out, them immediately hitting her g-spot.
"How do you want it?"
"F-Fast, please, Dio, Gyro, I'm begging!"
"If you say so," Gyro responded, snapping his hips up into her. Diego followed, timing in opposition with Gyro's, increasing the pleasure for all three of them.
"Ah, ah-ah, ah!" Joana clawed Diego's back, and Gyro dug his dull fingernails into her hips.
Each time either of the boys made a noise, it brought Joana closer to her climax.
"Ha-ah- 's so good, fuck, it feels s-so g- ah~!"
"Fuck," Diego leaned down, moving faster. Gyro pulled him into a kiss, throwing him off. Joana was too blissed out to do anything but moan loudly and claw at Diego's back.
"Damn," the Italian panted. "You're good at that."
"I try- Hah," Diego groaned, feeling Joana tighten around him.
"Don't stop! Please I- ah! I'm so- Ah, fuck, s-so close," Joana moaned weakly, eyes glazed over and nearly rolled all the way back, mouth stuck open.
The two sped up again, and clawing against them, Joana came around them, crying out their names.
It took all the boys had not to come then and there. They pulled out, shuddering. Overstimulated and begging for release, their bodies felt like they were going to fall apart. Diego began toward an empty room to finish himself off, but was stopped.
"Where're you going?"
"Oh," Diego turned to respond to the other man. "I was gonna go finish myself off, yeah?"
"Why don't we just finish each other?"
"Really?"
Gyro nodded, walking over and pressing their lips together, his hand finding its way to the other's dick. Diego's hips twitched when he touched him, and Gyro's did the same in response to Diego's fingers. They wrapped their hands around one another's cocks, not hesitating to rut up into the other's hand, moaning into the rare space between their lips.
"Mmm- Gyro, I-"
"Me too," Gyro said, quickly fucking into Diego's hand.
"Ah fuck, ah fuck, ah- ah- Fuck~~!" 
Gyro came a few seconds after, leaning against the wall to keep his balance. “Wow...”
”Yeah, wow,” Gyro sighed. “At least we’re not gonna get hypothermia.”
Diego laughed. “Damn right,” he snorted before picking his underwear up out of the floor. Joana was already asleep when the boys began putting their clothes back on, and when they wrapped their arms around her, snuggling under the blanket to keep warm, she sighed contentedly in her sleep, and received a soft, gentle kiss on each cheek.
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stirlingsports ¡ 4 months ago
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How Can Women's Activewear Enhance Your Workout Routine
When it comes to achieving your fitness goals, every detail counts—right down to your choice of activewear. Women’s activewear is more than just a fashion statement; it plays a critical role in enhancing your workout routine. 
The right gear can improve your performance, boost comfort, and even prevent injuries. Here’s a comprehensive look at how investing in quality activewear for women can transform your exercise experience.
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Comfort and Fit: The Foundation of a Great Workout
One of the most important aspects of activewear is comfort. Clothing that fits well and moves with you is crucial for any workout. When you’re comfortable, you can focus more on your exercise rather than adjusting your clothing or dealing with chafing.
Flexibility and Stretch: Look for activewear with added stretch, like spandex or elastane, which provides a full range of motion, essential for activities like yoga, running, or weight training.
Breathability: Fabrics with good breathability allow for better air circulation, preventing overheating and ensuring that you stay cool throughout your workout.
Moisture-Wicking Fabrics: High-quality activewear is often made from moisture-wicking materials that draw sweat away from your skin, keeping you dry and comfortable. This feature is especially important during high-intensity workouts.
Support Where You Need It Most
Different types of workouts require different types of support. Women’s activewear is designed to offer targeted support, ensuring that you can perform at your best.
Compression Wear: Compression garments, such as leggings and tops, provide support to your muscles, which can enhance blood flow and reduce muscle soreness post-workout.
Sports Bras: A well-fitted sports bra is crucial for reducing breast movement and minimising discomfort during high-impact activities. Choose bras with varying levels of support based on your activity level—high-impact for running, and low-impact for yoga.
Enhancing Performance Through Technology
Advancements in fabric technology have led to the creation of activewear for women that not only looks good but also enhances your performance.
Anti-Microbial Properties: Activewear with anti-microbial properties helps prevent the growth of bacteria and unpleasant odours, keeping your clothes fresher for longer and reducing the need for frequent washes.
Temperature Regulation: Some activewear features fabrics that adjust to your body temperature, keeping you warm in cooler conditions and cool when it’s hot. This helps you maintain optimal body temperature, which is essential for performance.
Boosting Confidence and Motivation
Wearing stylish and well-fitting activewear can boost your confidence and motivation. When you feel good in what you’re wearing, you’re more likely to stick to your workout routine and push yourself harder.
Positive Reinforcement: Investing in quality activewear can serve as a positive reinforcement, reminding you of your commitment to a healthier lifestyle and encouraging you to maintain your fitness goals.
Fashion-Forward Designs: Today’s activewear comes in a variety of colours, patterns, and designs that can match your personal style. Feeling good about how you look can enhance your motivation to work out regularly.
Preventing Injuries
Proper activewear can help prevent injuries by providing support and reducing the risk of strains and sprains.
Improved Posture: Compression wear and other supportive gear can help improve your posture during exercise, reducing the risk of injury and ensuring that you maintain proper form.
Padding and Protection: Some activewear includes padding or additional layers in areas that are prone to injury, such as the knees or lower back, providing extra protection during intense workouts.
Choosing the Right Activewear for Your Routine
Selecting the appropriate activewear depends on your specific workout routine and personal preferences. Here’s a quick guide:
Running: Opt for moisture-wicking, breathable fabrics with good compression to support your muscles and wick away sweat.
Yoga: Choose flexible, stretchable materials that offer a full range of motion and comfort.
Weight Training: Look for supportive and durable fabrics that can withstand the rigours of lifting and provide the necessary support to prevent injuries.
Final Thoughts
Women’s activewear is a crucial component of a successful workout routine. From enhancing comfort and support to improving performance and boosting confidence, the right activewear can make a significant difference. 
By investing in high-quality, well-fitting activewear for women tailored to your specific workout needs, you can optimise your exercise experience and stay motivated on your fitness journey. So, gear up, feel great, and get ready to take your workouts to the next level!
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thexptcom ¡ 5 months ago
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Optimizing Your Workout: Ab Crunch & Shoulder Machine
In the journey towards achieving peak fitness, the right tools and exercises can make all the difference. Among the myriad of gym equipment available, the abdominal crunch machine and shoulder machine exercises stand out for their effectiveness and ability to target key muscle groups. This article delves into the benefits and techniques of using these machines, offering insights into how they can be seamlessly integrated into your workout routine.
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### Understanding the Abdominal Crunch Machine
The abdominal crunch machine is a staple in most gyms, designed to specifically target the abdominal muscles. Unlike traditional crunches performed on the floor, this machine provides a controlled environment where resistance can be adjusted to match your fitness level. This makes it an ideal choice for both beginners and advanced gym-goers looking to sculpt their abs.
#### Benefits of the Abdominal Crunch Machine
1. **Targeted Muscle Activation**: The machine isolates the abdominal muscles, ensuring that they are the primary focus during the exercise. This isolation helps in achieving a more defined and toned midsection over time.
2. **Controlled Motion**: One of the significant advantages of using the abdominal crunch machine is the controlled motion it offers. This reduces the risk of injury, especially to the lower back, which is often a concern with traditional crunches.
3. **Adjustable Resistance**: The machine allows you to adjust the resistance, making it easier to progress in your workout. As your core strength improves, you can increase the resistance to continue challenging your muscles.
4. **Posture Support**: The machine is designed to support your posture, ensuring that you maintain the correct form throughout the exercise. This is particularly beneficial for those who are new to strength training or who may struggle with maintaining proper form during free-weight exercises.
### How to Use the Abdominal Crunch Machine
Using the abdominal crunch machine correctly is key to maximizing its benefits. Here’s a step-by-step guide:
1. **Adjust the Seat and Resistance**: Before starting, ensure that the seat is adjusted so that your feet are flat on the ground and your knees are at a 90-degree angle. Set the resistance to a level that challenges you but still allows you to complete the exercise with proper form.
2. **Position Yourself Correctly**: Sit on the machine and place your feet under the footpads. Grasp the handles or place your arms across your chest, depending on the machine’s design.
3. **Perform the Crunch**: Slowly contract your abdominal muscles to curl your torso forward. Focus on using your abs to perform the movement rather than pulling with your arms. Hold the contraction for a second before slowly returning to the starting position.
4. **Repeat**: Aim for 3 sets of 12-15 repetitions, adjusting the resistance as needed to maintain good form throughout.
### Shoulder Machine Exercises: Enhancing Upper Body Strength
While the abdominal crunch machine focuses on core strength, shoulder machine exercises are essential for building upper body power and stability. The shoulder muscles, or deltoids, are involved in almost every upper body movement, making them crucial for overall functional strength.
#### Benefits of Shoulder Machine Exercises
1. **Isolated Shoulder Targeting**: Shoulder machines are designed to isolate the deltoid muscles, allowing for a more focused workout. This isolation helps in developing stronger and more defined shoulders.
2. **Reduced Injury Risk**: Free weight exercises like shoulder presses can put a lot of strain on your joints if not performed correctly. Shoulder machines provide a more controlled environment, reducing the risk of injury.
3. **Balanced Muscle Development**: Using machines ensures that both sides of your body are working equally, helping to correct any muscle imbalances that may develop over time.
4. **Variety of Movements**: Most shoulder machines offer multiple grip options and adjustable settings, allowing you to perform different exercises such as the shoulder press, lateral raises, and front raises. This variety helps in targeting different parts of the shoulder muscles for comprehensive development.
### How to Perform Shoulder Machine Exercises
To get the most out of your shoulder machine workouts, follow these guidelines:
1. **Adjust the Machine**: Start by adjusting the seat height so that your shoulders are aligned with the machine’s handles. This alignment is crucial for ensuring that the right muscles are targeted during the exercise.
2. **Choose Your Grip**: Depending on the machine, you might have the option of different grips. A neutral grip (palms facing each other) is generally easier on the joints, while an overhand grip (palms facing forward) targets the deltoids more directly.
3. **Engage Your Core**: While performing the exercise, keep your core engaged to maintain stability and support your lower back. This will also help in transferring power effectively from your lower body to your upper body.
4. **Execute the Movement**: Push the handles upward (for shoulder presses) or outward (for lateral raises) in a controlled manner. Avoid using momentum to lift the weight, as this reduces the effectiveness of the exercise and increases the risk of injury.
5. **Controlled Return**: Slowly lower the handles back to the starting position, ensuring that you maintain tension in the shoulder muscles throughout the movement.
### Conclusion: Integrating These Machines into Your Routine
Both the abdominal crunch machine and shoulder machine exercises offer significant benefits when incorporated into a well-rounded fitness routine. By using these machines correctly, you can enhance your core stability and build stronger, more defined shoulders. Remember to start with appropriate resistance levels and gradually increase the intensity as your strength improves. With consistency and proper form, these machines can be powerful tools in your fitness arsenal, helping you achieve your goals more effectively and safely.
Whether you’re a seasoned gym-goer or just starting your fitness journey, these machines provide a reliable and effective way to target key muscle groups, making them a valuable addition to any workout regimen.
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fitjourneydaily ¡ 11 months ago
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The Importance of Proper Posture, Ergonomic Supports, Joint Alignment, and Muscle Strength for a Healthy Body
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In today's digital age, many of us spend a significant amount of time sitting and working at desks, leading to various physical discomforts and health issues. However, by understanding the significance of proper posture, ergonomic supports, joint alignment, and muscle strength, we can take proactive steps towards maintaining a healthy and pain-free body. In this article, we will explore the importance of these factors and provide practical tips for incorporating them into our daily lives. Section 1: Proper Posture Good posture is the foundation of a healthy body. It involves aligning the various segments of our body, including the head, neck, spine, and limbs, in an optimal position to prevent unnecessary strain. By maintaining proper posture, we can avoid muscle imbalances, reduce the risk of developing musculoskeletal disorders, and improve overall well-being. To achieve proper posture: 1. Sit up straight, with your back pressed against the chair's backrest, and avoid slumping or leaning forward. 2. Keep your feet flat on the ground or use a footrest if needed to maintain balance. 3. Position your computer screen at eye level to reduce strain on the neck and eyes. 4. Take frequent breaks to stretch and move around, promoting circulation and relieving muscle tension. Section 2: Ergonomic Supports Incorporating ergonomic supports into our work environments can have a significant impact on our overall comfort and health. Ergonomics focuses on adapting the workspace to fit the individual, rather than trying to fit the individual into the workspace. Key ergonomic supports to consider: 1. Use an adjustable chair with lumbar support to maintain the natural curve of the spine. 2. Ensure your desk height allows your elbows to rest comfortably at a 90-degree angle. 3. Utilize a keyboard and mouse that provide proper wrist support to prevent strain. 4. Invest in an ergonomic chair cushion or backrest for additional lumbar support. Section 3: Joint Alignment When our joints are properly aligned, they work together efficiently and experience less wear and tear. Misalignment of joints can lead to discomfort, limited range of motion, and an increased risk of injury. Tips for joint alignment: 1. Practice gentle joint mobility exercises to promote flexibility and alignment. 2. Avoid excessive repetitive movements that could strain the joints. 3. Engage in activities that strengthen the supporting muscles around the joints, such as yoga or resistance training. 4. Maintain a healthy weight to alleviate unnecessary stress on the joints. Section 4: Muscle Strength Building and maintaining muscle strength is crucial for overall health and posture. Strong muscles not only support the body's structure but also enhance our ability to perform daily tasks with ease. Ways to improve muscle strength: 1. Incorporate resistance training exercises into your routine, targeting major muscle groups. 2. Enjoy activities like swimming, cycling, or hiking, which engage multiple muscle groups. 3. Practice regular stretching exercises to maintain muscle flexibility and prevent imbalances. 4. Start with light weights and gradually increase resistance to avoid injury. Conclusion: By prioritizing proper posture, utilizing ergonomic supports, maintaining joint alignment, and improving muscle strength, we can cultivate a healthier and more comfortable body. Incorporating these practices into our daily lives, both during work and leisure, will not only reduce the risk of pain and injury but also enhance our overall well-being. Remember, small changes can make a significant difference in your physical comfort and longevity. Transform your weight loss journey with our advanced formula, meticulously developed with 10 Key Metabolic Boosters. Unveil the secret to effectively shedding unwanted weight and enhancing your metabolism. Our scientifically designed blend leverages the strength of natural, powerful ingredients acclaimed for their weight loss benefits. Perfect for those aiming to achieve a healthier body, maintain weight loss, or discover a natural approach to weight management, our product presents a comprehensive solution. Feel the power of nature's most effective, selectively chosen for their profound impact on weight loss. Enter a realm where achieving your desired weight is not just a dream, but a reality, and witness the change with each use. Start your path to a healthier, slimmer you today. Learn more about how these 10 Key Metabolic Boosters can revolutionize your weight loss regimen. Visit the Weight Loss Ritual Product Page. Transform your sleep patterns with our groundbreaking formula, expertly created with a Rare Herbal Blend. Discover the secret to effectively conquering insomnia and promoting restful sleep. Our scientifically crafted mixture utilizes the essence of a unique, potent herb known for its sleep-inducing properties. Ideal for those seeking a natural remedy to improve sleep quality, reduce nighttime wakefulness, or find an herbal solution to insomnia, our product offers a comprehensive sleep aid. Experience the soothing power of this rare herb, meticulously selected for its unparalleled effectiveness in enhancing sleep. Enter a world where deep, rejuvenating sleep is not just a wish, but a nightly reality, and notice the difference with each use. Begin your journey to uninterrupted, quality sleep today. Learn more about how this Rare Herbal Blend can revolutionize your sleep experience. Visit the Sleep Guard Plus Product Page. Revitalize your joint health with our breakthrough formula, infused with 10 Essential Joint-Relief Compounds. Uncover the solution to effectively alleviate and manage persistent joint pain. Our scientifically crafted blend taps into the potency of natural ingredients, recognized for their anti-inflammatory and pain-relieving properties. Perfect for individuals aiming to restore joint flexibility, reduce discomfort, or discover a natural approach to joint pain, our product provides an all-encompassing treatment. Feel the power of nature's most effective, carefully chosen to offer maximum relief from joint pain. Enter a world where improved joint mobility and pain-free living are attainable, and witness the change with each application. Embark on your path to enhanced joint health. Learn more about how these 10 Essential Joint-Relief Compounds can transform your approach to joint pain. Visit the Joint Pain Killer Product Page. Transform your approach to joint pain relief with our groundbreaking formula, developed by a Rogue Doctor using 10 Revolutionary Pain Relief Agents. Discover the key to effectively soothing and eradicating persistent joint pain. Our scientifically engineered blend harnesses the strength of unique, powerful ingredients, celebrated for their unparalleled pain-relief properties. Ideal for those seeking to rejuvenate joint health, halt pain recurrence, or explore a radical solution to joint discomfort, our product provides a complete therapeutic experience. Experience the potency of innovative elements, meticulously chosen for their supreme efficacy in combatting joint pain. Step into a world where lasting joint comfort is attainable, and feel the improvement with each use. Begin your journey to revitalized joint health. Learn more about how these 10 Revolutionary Pain Relief Agents can revolutionize your approach to joint pain. Visit the Bio Joint Plus Product Page. Enhance your nail and hair health with our innovative formula, specially formulated with 10 Essential Nutrients for Stronger Nails and Hair. Uncover the secret to effectively nourishing and strengthening your nails and hair. Our scientifically developed blend combines the power of natural, potent ingredients renowned for their nourishing properties. Ideal for those seeking to improve nail strength, enhance hair vitality, or find a natural solution for hair and nail care, our product offers a comprehensive approach. Experience the benefits of nature's finest ingredients, carefully selected for their effectiveness in promoting healthy nails and hair. Enter a world where vibrant hair and strong nails are a reality, and feel the improvement with each application. Start your journey to healthier nails and hair today. Learn more about how these 10 Essential Nutrients can revolutionize your nail and hair health. Visit the Keravita Pro Product Page. Read the full article
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georgemandal ¡ 1 year ago
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Enhancing Road Safety: The Advantages of Mirror Dash Cams
In the dynamic landscape of modern driving, road safety has become a paramount concern for motorists. One innovative solution gaining popularity is the mirror dash cam, a discreet yet powerful device that offers a comprehensive approach to enhancing safety on the roads.
Introduction:
Mirror dash cams have emerged as a revolutionary tool for drivers seeking to capture a holistic view of their journeys. Unlike traditional dash cams, these unobtrusive devices seamlessly integrate with the rearview mirror, providing a dual-functionality of both reflection and recording.
1. Comprehensive Visibility:
One of the primary advantages of mirror dash cams is their ability to provide a 180-degree view of the road. Positioned at the center of the vehicle, these cams eliminate blind spots, ensuring that every angle is covered. This comprehensive visibility is crucial for anticipating and responding to potential hazards on the road.
2. Discreet Design:
Unlike bulky dash cams that can obstruct the driver's view, mirror dash cams boast a discreet design that seamlessly fits into the existing rearview mirror. This unobtrusive integration maintains the aesthetics of the vehicle while still delivering advanced safety features.
3. Incident Documentation:
Mirror dash cams serve as reliable witnesses in the event of accidents or unexpected incidents. With continuous recording capabilities, these devices capture high-quality footage of the road, providing valuable evidence that can be crucial in insurance claims or legal proceedings.
4. Parking Protection:
Beyond on-road safety, mirror dash cams contribute to off-road security by offering parking protection. Equipped with motion sensors, these devices can detect and record any suspicious activity around the parked vehicle, acting as a deterrent against theft or vandalism.
5. User-Friendly Operation:
The user-friendly nature of mirror dash cams is another standout feature. With simple installation processes and intuitive controls, these devices are accessible to all drivers, regardless of technical expertise. The ease of use encourages a broader adoption, contributing to a safer driving culture.
6. Cost-Effective Solution:
Mirror dash cams present a cost-effective solution for those looking to enhance their vehicle's safety features. Rather than investing in separate rearview and dash cameras, drivers can consolidate these functionalities into a single, multifaceted device.
Conclusion:
In conclusion, mirror dash cams represent a significant leap forward in the pursuit of road safety. With their comprehensive visibility, discreet design, incident documentation capabilities, parking protection, user-friendly operation, and cost-effectiveness, these devices offer a holistic approach to driver and passenger security. As the automotive industry continues to evolve, integrating innovative solutions like mirror dash cams will undoubtedly contribute to creating a safer and more secure driving environment for all.
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myfeeds ¡ 1 year ago
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Bound states in the continuum is possible in the acoustoelastic coupling
Let’s imagine a hypothetical scenario where two individuals are gripping a rope, each holding one end. Person A proceeds to shake the rope in an up-and-down motion, thus generating a propagating wave that travels towards person B. Now, if person C, positioned between person A and B, engages in a comparable frequency of waving motion as that of the rope’s wave, could the wave be redirected back to person A rather than reaching person B? Initially, this situation appears implausible, as person C does not physically interact with the rope held by person A and B, seemingly defying the possibility of achieving a 100% wave reflection similar to that observed in a perfect mirror. Nonetheless, this phenomenon finds explanation within the domain of physics and is known as the “bound state in the continuum (BIC).” The study of BIC has encompassed diverse disciplines including quantum mechanics, optics, semi-conductors, and nano-optics. Utilizing this phenomenon facilitates the confinement of light particles, or photons, preventing their forward propagation. Moreover, BIC holds promise for the development of highly sensitive sensors. Previous research into BIC has predominantly focused on microscale and nanoscale contexts while investigations using visible structures to explain this phenomenon have been absent. Recently, a research team led by Professor Junsuk Rho from the Department of Mechanical Engineering and the Department of Chemical Engineering and PhD candidates Dongwoo Lee, Jeonghoon Park, and Seokwoo Kim from the Department of Mechanical Engineering at Pohang University of Science and Technology (POSTECH) successfully demonstrated bound states in the continuum through the utilization of an acoustoelastic coupling structure for the first time. The research findings have been published in Extreme Mechanics Letters, one of the world’s most influential journals in the field of mechanics. The research team designed an experiment setup aimed at verifying the existence of the BIC phenomenon through the interplay of sound and elasticity. Commencing with the fabrication of an elastic bar resembling a stick, the team proceeded to induce vibrations in the elastic bar by means of a shaker. Subsequently, air injection at a predetermined location on the elastic bar engendered coupling between sound and elasticity. In the experiment, when the frequency of the elastic progressive wave aligned closely with the resonance frequency generated within the acoustic cavity, a strong interaction manifested, resulting in the complete reflection of the progressive elastic wave. In essence, the elastic wave reverted back along the direction it came from, becoming indefinitely confined within a certain space, similar to the behavior observed when encountering a mirror, despite having ample room for forward propagation. While many studies have explored the utilization of bound states in the continuum, this research represents the first instance of unveiling the BIC phenomenon through the combination of elasticity and sound. Professor Junsuk Rho emphasized the potential implications of the findings, “This study illustrates that applications of acoustoelastic coupling can be expanded to vibration focusing and energy storage.” He added, “The findings from this research hold promise for diverse applications including the development of filters capable of selectively isolating specific frequencies or the advancement of energy harvesting methodologies that convert kinetic energy into electric energy.” The study was conducted with the support from the Ministry of Science and ICT and the National Research Foundation of Korea.
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fiction-box ¡ 2 years ago
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Hello hello I see requests are open 👀 I loved your "only one bed" fic w Ashe so I'm here to ask for more lol
May I get a fem or gn reader tutoring Felix and Sylvain (you can just choose one if you're not feeling inspired) in magic? If I remember correctly both of them have a budding talent in reason magic so maybe the professor saw that and assigned reader to help cultivate that talent??
Idk how much detail you like in your requests so feel free to ignore the rest of this!! But if you want more specifics maybe reader has always been a little nervous around the nobles in the BL house since they're a commoner?? And even though they have every confidence in their abilities they're not very assertive so Byleth wanted reader to learn how to take charge in a situation and actually tell people what to do lol
Thank you in advance!! :D
This is one of the reasons I value requests so much. There are so many ideas you guys come up with that I want to discover!
I took these two stories in two very different directions, but I think they both stay true to the prompt in their own way. The different sways of each story are heavily influenced on how I think one would have to interact with each character to achieve the specifics we're looking for.
In this case, I was inspired to write Sylvain's story with more edges and harsh moments, though Felix's was created with a much softer arc in mind.
Enjoy! Requests are open to all. Send in as many as you wish!
The stories will be continued under the cut.
Sylvain:
“N-No! No. Please wait!”
For what must have been the third time this session, you adjusted the position of Sylvain’s hands so that his fingers were curled inwards.
“Remember? If you don’t curl your fingers in, you aren’t directing the magic properly. That could cause the fire to spread sideways rather than forward, and then you’d be putting everyone around you in danger.”
“Right,” he chuckled. “My bad.”
You were quite certain he did remember, but you didn’t say anything about it. It was a trivial matter, really. Curling his fingers yourself every once in a while was nothing compared to what you knew he could do to you if you got even slightly too pushy with him.
“That’s alright, just…try to keep it in mind as we go through the motions, okay?”
Taking a step back, you sighed and relaxed your body a bit. You were going to make sure the only thing he lit on fire would be the target across from him. Burning down the training grounds was not an appealing idea to you.
“So, different people pull their magic from different places within them, yes? For example, Mercedes feels her magic from somewhere closer to her heart, while Annette describes her pull as somewhere within her head. Personally, I feel my own resonate within my palms.”
He nodded. Good. You were getting somewhere.
“I can’t just tell you where to pull yours from, though. What I can say is that once we find your source, the rest is easy. While we could do some research or studying to make a more educated presumption, I’ve found that the fastest method is just to guess and check.”
Sylvain stretched out his arms and hands, “Sure. Walk me through it then, professor~.”
You were just about to until he returned his hands to the wrong position. Again.
No, you were not going to sigh. You were not going to show any signs of impatience, you were simply going to breathe normally, approach him calmly, and gently reposition his hands.
And as much as the little nickname irked you, you wouldn’t say anything about that, either.
What was the scale of a commoner’s displeasure at a nickname when compared to that of the power of a noble? One with a crest, no less. He didn’t need to learn magic in order to ruin your life. Or order your death.
He certainly didn’t need to know you were intimidated by him, lest he get any ideas.
“You’re pointed at the target right now. I’ve adjusted your form so that it’s perfect. The only thing left is for you to pull the magic from your body and feel it spread into your fingertips.”
“Got it,'' he winked, then turned his eyes back to the target.
There. You were almost done. The only thing that was left was for him to find the magic. After all, you were confident in your ability to show him how to use it.
“...”
“It’s fine, don’t worry!” you reassured him frantically. Goddess knows what he might do if he thought this was your fault. “It can take a bit of time, just make sure you’re focusing on tracing it to your- NO, WAIT-!”
You rushed to his side when you noticed he had wrecked his form and yet was still trying. This time, a small flame did come out of his hands. However, thanks to his uncontrolled form, it began to widen to his sides.
“Woah. Uh, what do I do now?” he asked. A sliver of panic had slipped its way into his tone.
“Just aim at the target and imagine it shooting forward. Do it quickly; it’s too late to control the fire at this point, so we need to let it go before it-”
You let out a squeak of surprise as you watched it shoot across the room to the target. The widened flame hit it, but the fire didn’t truly catch onto the target. Though you were certain it would have missed if his form was actually correct, it had become clear what the professor had meant when she mentioned he had a “budding talent” in the art.
When you were originally assigned to work on magic with Sylvain, you had voiced your concerns to Professor Byleth.
“You want me to teach? And a noble, of all people? One that you claim has talent, yet has never even accessed his magic before?”
“Good,” she smiled, “so you heard me.”
“I…please, I don’t think this is a good idea. I don’t know the first thing about teaching, or…or giving orders…or…”
“That’s why you’ll be teaching one of your classmates. It will benefit us all for you to find your backbone.”
“Well then, what about Ashe? I’ll teach Ashe, or I’ll even teach Dedue, but…it isn’t really my place to teach a noble. Besides, I have a family, and if anything happens-”
“Okay,” the mercenary laughed, “now you’re definitely not getting out of this. It looks like you can learn quite a few lessons from such an experience, after all.”
“But-”
“Sylvain will be waiting for you at the training grounds. I expect you to arrive on time. I will check on you periodically.”
Well, so much for that, you thought to yourself. You hadn’t seen so much as the color of Professor Byleth’s hair since this whole thing began.
As you finished the task you had originally approached Sylvain to complete, you began to wonder how curling his fingers of all things would be the most challenging part of this lesson. He was clearly listening to you when you spoke, so the issue must be in your directions, right? Maybe you really weren’t cut out for this whole “giving-orders” thing, even though you thought you had been doing a good job, so far.
“Hey,” Sylvain began. “Why haven’t you said anything to me?”
You paused, “What do you mean? I’ve been talking you through the process this whole time.” Honestly, now you weren't sure if he was listening. Maybe he was the spacey type.
Sylvain quirked an eyebrow, “Every time I fail to go back into position, you just stop and move my fingers manually. I must have done it at least four times by now, and most girls would have told me to knock it off at this point.”
“I don’t…” four was an understatement. But did he really not realize the reason for your hesitation? “...know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes. You do. There’s this look in your eye every time you notice it. You have a lot more patience than I do, that’s for sure. Your tone of voice stays neutral or positive, and each time you maneuver my hands, you don’t move them any rougher than you did the time before it. But even with all of those behaviors combined, you manage to give it away through your eyes.”
What.
He’s been able to notice all of those…traits…of your behavior over the past two hours you’ve been working to teach him, but he still can’t do any better than a spread flame of-?
There’s no way.
“So you’re saying you know how to use the proper positioning?”
“Pssh. Yeah, I think it’s safe to say I got it the first time.” the red-headed noble teased, “But all those extra times you spent showing me really helped-”
“Do it, then.”
His brows knit lightly, “What?”
You pointed at the target he had only technically hit during his last shot, “Get into your form. Aim at the target. And light it on fire.”
Sylvain was too stunned to speak. Instead, he did as you said, turning to face the target and firing a small fireball at the center. Sure enough, it caught fire. Right on the mark.
His smug demeanor returned, “So, how did I do? Don’t you think I should get some form of a reward for all my hard work today?”
You slowly exhale, closing your eyes and calming your heartbeat. Then, you fire your own flame spell at the target. The hay is half ember and half ash when you turn to leave.
“We’re done. I’m done.”
“Woah,” Sylvain’s eyes went wide as he stared into the remains of the fire. Quickly recovering from his shock, he turned back to you, “You oka-?”
“Two hours of my life!” you snap, spinning on your heel to face him. “Gone! Wasted!”
“Hey, now, don’t get too upset. After all, I know a few women that would be jealous of someone getting to spend that much one-on-one time with me,” his signature smirk returns, and all you can think of is how much you’d like to burn the look off his face. “Why don’t we go out and get some tea together? Would that make you feel better?”
“Two hours! And now you want even more time?”
You actually wanted to cry, now, but there was no way you were going to give him the satisfaction.
“I was supposed to spend my time with Mercedes and Annette, this afternoon! I would’ve had tea with them! Then we would’ve studied for our certification exams, and…I didn’t need this! And you certainly didn’t need this much time from me.”
Sylvain actually looked a little hurt at that, and before you could truly process everything you had just done, you heard three small raps at the entrance of the training grounds.
“That’s quite enough, you two. Sylvain, please head back to my classroom and wait for me there. We’re going to be having a little chat about training etiquette, but not before I speak with your classmate.”
His regretful expression left almost as quickly as it came when he turned to face Professor Byleth with a wink, “Right. Don’t keep me waiting, Professor!”
She glared at him, and you were immediately glad her look wasn’t directed at you.
“Don’t tempt me. Maybe I won’t show up for two hours. Whatever keeps me entertained, right?”
The Gautier noble lost his smirk as your own mouth formed a thin line to keep from smiling. You weren’t sorry for him in the slightest; especially not after he treated you like a plaything for the better part of an afternoon.
“And no detours!” she barked as he left.
You stepped forward, “Professor…I don’t-”
“I disagree.”
You blinked twice, “What?”
“With what you said earlier,” she smiled, “about not needing this. I disagree.”
The tension in your shoulders dropped in defeat, “What are you talking about, professor? I must have completed what you told me to at least an hour ago, but I wasn’t even competent enough to pick up on it. There was absolutely no reason for me to stay any longer than that, and especially not with someone as depreciative of my company as-”
But it didn’t feel like she was listening to you. Her smile was just growing, and all you could do was trail off and watch as your professor turned and headed for the door.
“You’ve grown more than you realize. You were finally able to assert yourself today.”
You shuddered a little, “I’m still worried about what I said to him.”
With her hand on the door, Professor Byleth faced you one last time, “Don’t be. Now you know as well as I do. Those nobles think they can do whatever they want, so it’s an important lesson for us to learn.” She nodded once, “It’s okay to stand up for yourself, my student. Someone needs to keep them in check.”
The doors of the grounds shut behind her with a thud.
She was right, you knew. You felt more sure of yourself, just as she had asked you to become. Not only that, but now that you knew people like Sylvain were qualified to be nobles, you weren’t as scared to talk to them.
But now you had a new fear. One day, Fodlan’s future would rest in the hands of nobles like these.
If messing around was the best they could do, they definitely had their work cut out for them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Felix:
“It’s not working.”
“Don’t worry, th-that’s alright! This is only your first day, after all. I think you’re doing well.”
Felix huffed, “Doing well isn’t going to save my life when I can’t cut through someone’s armor. Stop flattering me and actually do something to help.”
“R-right! Of course!” you stumbled. You allowed your eyes to scan Felix’s body, evaluating his form and making a mental checklist. He was able to create the magic just fine, but the Faerghus noble was completely lost when it came to firing it.
“Well, your stance is great, and you can summon the magic easily enough. B-but I don’t have enough information to properly identify a problem area-”
“Then show me again,” he ordered as Professor Byleth entered the training grounds. She was carrying a handful of spears that she must have just bought.
“That’s enough, Felix. You're the one listening, here. Let your friend do her job.”
He balked at that. “She is not my friend. Neither of us are here by choice, in case you’re having trouble recalling the context of the situation you put us in!”
Your teacher began swapping out the new lances in her arms for the broken and rusted ones discarded around the training grounds. “Well, complaining about it isn’t going to get you anywhere. Just be nice and listen, and I’m sure this will be over before you know it.”
The swordsman turned to you, clenching his teeth, “Please. Show me how you performed the spell. Again.”
“Y-Yes!”
“Ah-ah. No,” you turned to Professor Byleth as she looked you in the eyes, “You’re the professor. You’re the one giving the orders. Felix isn’t teaching you how to teach. You’re teaching him magic.”
“Ah, right,” you stood a little taller, “In that case…Felix, I’m going to demonstrate how to cast the Thunder spell once more.”
Your posture faltered at the resounding sigh from across the room. “I’m going off to the shop to repair these weapons. I expect this…dynamic…to be fixed when I return.”
As you watched your professor leave, the noble next to you cleared his throat. Back to work.
“Okay, I-I can go slow. And I’ll talk you through it!”
You got into your original stance, going over each component from your feet to your fingers. Felix reproduced your efforts methodically.
Next, you informed him of the process of garnering magic from your internal source. As the Thunder gathered in your hands, it did the same in his. It was just as bright as yours, which had always come as a surprise.
You didn’t dwell on it too long as you came to the part of the system you knew you’d spend the most time on. You tried to describe it as best you could; tracing an imaginary line between your fingers and your target before letting it go. And while yours went, the lightning magic between Felix’s hands began to grow in size and glow ever brighter.
“Tch. Not again.”
“Hold on, I’ll get it!” you reassured him, running across the room to grab one of the logs you were using as targets. Returning to him, you placed the wood in his hands as it took the brunt of the power from his spell. However, the rest of it went into you.
“Agh-! Th…that’s-” you hug your arms to your chest, attempting to cradle them against one another lightly, “that’s definitely what a Thunder spell with double the power would feel like.”
While Felix didn’t outright ask if you were alright, you felt his eyes scanning over your arms. But as long as you were the one taking the hit and not him, he couldn’t get any more upset with you, right? A commoner teaching magic to a noble. While you didn’t doubt that you could, you were not exactly confident that you should. However, it wasn’t up to you. Professor Byleth called the shots.
Shots that you needed to be giving right now, you remembered.
“Forgive me! I need to focus.”
Felix opened his mouth as if in protest, but you spoke again before he could get any sound out, “So, tell me exactly what you’re thinking when you try to fire off the spell.”
He furrowed his brow, “Just like you said. I draw that invisible line in my mind, I run my arms along it, and I think of letting go. Releasing.”
“Hmm. I think that might be our issue.”
“You think?”
“Hey, I’m not exactly the best at teaching compared to just doing, in case you couldn’t already tell.”
Only after the words were out of your mouth did you realize what you just said.
“Oh no- I’m so sorry! Look, I…I’ll figure this out for you, you’ll execute it, and then we won’t have to do this again.”
“Calm down. You’re allowed to be frustrated, too,” he scoffed. “I haven’t exactly been a model student.”
“Right…a-anyway, try going through the routine once more, but instead of thinking about releasing, think of pushing. That way you’re using both mental and physical force.”
So you watched as Felix did just that. He got into his stance, gathered the magic into his hands, pushed his arms forward, and furrowed his brow.
But the lighting grew ever brighter, the supply of logs grew ever smaller, and your arms grew ever more sore.
“W-why-” you asked, cradling your arms together once more. Tears formed in your eyes as you looked elsewhere, fighting the pain. “I don’t get it.”
“Come on!” Felix shouted at himself. With your head turned away from him, however, you had presumed your so-called “student’s” anger was directed at you.
Consequently, you flinched away from him.
From outside of your view, Felix’s eyes widened slightly. He softened his tone a bit, “Woah…Hey, are you alright?”
“Please,” you pleaded, turning to fully face him. “I’m doing my best. I just…if you could just give me a bit more time to wor-”
“I’m not mad at you, and I’m definitely not about…to hurt…you…” he began to trail off.
He was staring at your arms. Once you followed his gaze, you could see why. With a gasp, you held them straight out in front of you.
The flesh of your arms was burned.
It went in a pattern that made it look like something had lashed at you. The last log you used must not have been as effective as you had hoped it would be. Your knees dropped out in shock.
Felix burst toward you. Catching your torso, he lightly lowered you to the ground.
Dread cloaked your thoughts like a shadow as your breathing became more shallow and stuttered. You couldn’t cast healing magic over yourself. Moving your arms at all was a special kind of torture, but performance of the spell you needed couldn’t be achieved without more range of motion.
“Teach me how to heal you.”
You opened your mouth to speak, but you were still too petrified to register what he had said.
“What?”
“Look, maybe I can’t fire off lightning, but we can both clearly see from your arms that the spell worked. If you can teach me how to heal, even if I can’t send it into you, you can still make use of the spell on yourself by placing your arms where you used to put the logs.”
It sounded like a reasonable enough plan. It was the best thing you had at the moment, anyway. You didn’t think you could move about to get help in this state, and you didn’t like the idea of being left alone in the training grounds, either.
So you walked him through it. Kneeling together on the floor, you told him to change his fingers into a cupped form. He was instructed to send the power through his wrists rather than his fingertips to get it to form. Then, with his hands glowing green and hovering over your arms, you directed him to give the magic directly to your afflicted areas.
Both of you were stunned when Felix was able to send the healing magic to you on his first try. You didn’t need to move into it, it just flowed from his wrists into your arms.
Your head gave an involuntary bow as you felt the magic wash over you. It was like a light breeze on a hot day. More like a cool salve on a burn, you supposed.
“Thank you,” you breathed, head still lowered. Your breaths continued, slow and deep as you closed your eyes.
It got you thinking, though. How was it that Felix could fire his healing magic effectively, but not the Thunder spell you had both been working on? It was the same principle, though you think you conveniently forgot to instruct him on it, this time.
Your eyes opened lightly as you felt the flow of magic dissipate from your body. Felix must have stopped, then.
As you tried to lift your head back up, your vision spotted and dizziness set in. You supposed you had never truly been injured that badly before. Sure, the attacks you had taken throughout the time of one battle all added together might total quite a bit of agony, but Mercedes was always around to heal you at intervals whenever you suffered anything noticeable.
“...ngh..”
“Easy,” Felix stated, moving his hands to balance your shoulders, “you’ll get up when you’re ready. Nothing good will come from you pushing yourself right now.”
Focusing on your breathing, you put your head back down and placed your palms in front of you for balance.
“What were you thinking…" you took another deep breath, steadying yourself. "When you sent the healing spell, what was the thought permeating your mind?”
His hold on your shoulders tightened subtly, “I was just thinking that I wanted you to take it.”
“There, then,” you affirmed as your voice returned to you in full. “That’s going to be what you need to do in order to fire your spells. Your objective will be to get the recipient to take the spell from you.”
Trying to lift your head up once more, you succeeded. You let your eyes blink a few times, then turned to the noble kneeling next to you.
“So, go do it. One more try,” you nodded. “If it doesn’t work, we’ll be done.”
His lips pressed against each other, and his eyes hardened. You could tell he was less than interested.
“I promise I have learned from my mistakes. You’ve already found the solution, Felix. You performed it just now. The only thing that’s left is to use the proper spell.”
“Got it,” he stood, moving into position a few feet away from his target. Before he gets into his form, though, he looks to you.
“If it backfires-”
“It won’t.”
He clenched his teeth, “It might not, but I’m telling you that if it does, you’re not grabbing that log. I’ll find a way to take care of it myself, understood?”
You laughed, “Don’t worry, I couldn’t stand if I tried.”
“I mean it.”
“I’ll stay right here. I promise.”
That seemed to be the answer he was looking for. The swordsman turned back to the target, took his stance, and you observed as the lightning formed in his hands.
You watched him shove the spell forward, and just as you predicted, the lightning flew from his hand into the center of the target.
“Just like that!” you smiled warmly, eyes fixed on where the projectile had struck.
Right on cue, the doors to the training grounds flew open, unceremoniously announcing the return of Professor Byleth. The first thing her gaze landed on was the scorched target across from Felix.
“Wonderful jo-” as she turned to address the two of you, however, her eyes caught on your own position.
“Why are you on the floor?”
“...”
“...”
“Uh…Felix knows healing magic, now…?”
After a quick interrogation to ensure neither of you deliberately hurt one another just so he might practice his powers in faith, the mercenary escorted both of you to see Professor Manuela.
Fortunately, she didn’t spot any remaining injuries on either of you. This led your own professor to become quite pleased with your performances, and she insisted that this become a more permanent arrangement.
You were originally concerned about how much time you would have to spend teaching until Professor Byleth began a weekly rotation system between the two of you.
Though you can’t say you were ever fond of the sword, you were definitely not expecting to ever become so experienced with one in such a short period of time. Now that you and Felix could both effectively use magic and metal interchangeably, the two of you possessed extreme versatility on the battlefield.
The Blue Lions were now more than ever a force to be reckoned with, and it was safe to say that the House overall was far from displeased.
340 notes ¡ View notes
oatmealcrisp-freak ¡ 3 years ago
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I Noticed Something and Am Ignoring Other Things drawing consistently is hard and angles shhhh its okay just let it happen and so I PRESENT TO YOU ALL
Saiki’s Limiter Expressions!
I think I’ve made a ground breaking discovery here, folks. It’s not just a ‘what if because that’d be like so totes mcscrunkles cute’ - it’s canon. Saiki emotes via limiter position!!!
Now please bear with me because ‘expression’ may be a strong word, as it usually is for Saiki’s face so too can it be for his limiters. In this breaking report, ‘expression’ may denote both emotion and a level of focus. 
As an example, please consider:
Neutral Position - Directly Above Ear.
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This seems to Indicate a sense of worry but he’s forcing himself to appear as neutral as possible to avoid giving away his concern. This may also be a genuinely neutral expression, or even an indicator of fogginess such as pure bliss
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but also stiffen up in stressful situations
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so always be sure to keep context in mind to judge whether or not your Saiki is genuinely blase
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or just putting on a show! But what does it look like when he emotes with his limiters without censor? WELL!
Forward Position - Approaching Temples.
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Have you ever noticed in your feline friends that when they’re intent on an object - you, a toy, a noise, their favourite treats - their ears will face forward?
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Well after combing through the manga I’ve deduced Saiki also seems to share this trait! If something catches his attention or if he’s feeling (tsunderily) affectionate, his limiters will shift closer to his temples in a forward facing position, rather than sitting primly above his ears!
But of course a forward position also implies a
Pressed Back Position - Behind Ears.
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I have found these two images wherein Saiki’s head is in nearly the same position. Please note the far limiter’s position in regard to Saiki’s bangs! In the bottom only the ball is visible - Saiki is in a crowd in this scene, with Teruhashi even, and because of that he’s recieving more attention than he wants which is scaring him. 
However in the top, please note that the attachment piece is visible through his bangs, implying a forward position! In this scene, Saiki is intently focused on a new member of his home, a toy even, that requires checking out especially because the art style is different. 
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Very reasonable to be quite intent on that.
I think this inference is strengthened by how in the bottom panel, Saiki’s head is facing camera ever so slightly more, but we still can’t see the head attachment through his hair, whereas it’s the opposite in the top!
Please see also,
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Two more very scary situations which could 100% warrant a nervous expression! His limiters are pressed very far back here, quite firmly behind his ears. For a point of comparison please consider this next image where the head attachments aren’t visible.
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And this one also
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It’s especially apparent in the panel where Akechi is calling him out, his balls are almost completely turned back! Saiki is both intent on the threatening figure behind him and confronted by one of his worst fears - the possibility of his secret getting out!
Though it’s somewhat difficult to make out due to the distance, size, and perspective in the very important photo below, the above limiter position is almost exactly the same when Saiki returns home to do battle with a
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cockroach!! See in this here image (h-ear if you will), 
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I’ve determined this by using top tier technology to cast precise measurements to show that there is a significant distance implying that his limiter is turned backwards in terror. Amazing that the poor lad didn’t pull an Akechi.
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I believe this highly advanced model shows that there is not just correlation but causation between the position of Saiki’s limiter and his fear of the Dreaded G! 
This has further lead me to the conclusion that, given the extreme range of motion these limiters display 
and 
the fact that THESE ARE LITERALLY TWO NEEDLES GOING INTO SAIKI’S BRAIN LIKE WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK LIKE NEEDLES
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WHAT THE FU
The only answer that explains how Saiki is able to avoid horrifying levels of brain damage 
The only possibility, indeed, a surefire fact, not bet,
is that Saiki’s brain
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Is made of coffee jelly!!!
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That concludes my highly scientific research essay thank you for your time there will be no citations.
173 notes ¡ View notes
thecameronchronicles ¡ 2 years ago
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Movement
youtube
TW: Smut. Language. Public(ish) sex.
SUMMARY: Based on the song ‘Movement’ by Hozier. 
WORD COUNT: 1500
*Requested*
Anonymous asked:
hi! could you write a pope x reader smut inspired by the song ‘movement’ by hozier where the reader is a dancer and pope is watching her rehearse with a male dancer (who clearly likes her) and he super jealous but the sex isn’t dominant, more passionate?
thank you in advance, i really love your stories and i appreciate what you do for pope fans 🥰
*THANK YOU SO MUCH! I’M SO GLAD THAT YOU WANT TO READ ABOUT POPE! HE IS SO UNDERRATED AND IT’S SO SAD! BUT I HOPE THIS HELPS ;)
Movement
No matter the specific choreography, Pope was in awe of every single motion of your hips. Whether it would be a simple sway from east to west or a complicated twist where your flexibility reminded him of the more intimate moments between the two of you, he found everything about your body to call to him. His lips would be forced apart by his tongue cast forward in a slow lick as you knew exactly how to summon your body in rhythm with the music and he adored the look of bliss and happiness spread across your face as you were completely within your element. But as he could truly watch you for hours, if not indefinitely until his own demise, he could not stand that of your dance partner, and it showed as the look of lust over his face altered to tension. 
The reason for the tension had been for the way your partner looked at you. For the way his hands would drift ‘accidentally’ over the curve of your ass when he’d release you or transition from one dance move to another. Especially because of how his eyes would drink you in just as your boyfriend’s had. But to be honest, Pope didn’t need much of a reason to narrow his eyes or clench his jaw as the thought of anybody else’s hands on you had been enough to make his blood boil. And if not for the smile it brought on your face, he would have convinced you away from the profession entirely, or at least tried to. 
“Baby!” You exclaimed with genuine excitement while moving to him with a kiss. He became lost for only a moment as he held you to himself, his hands gluttonous on your hips as you only intended for this to be a peck. But when you had pulled apart, the rolled eyes of your dance partner having upset Pope, he brought you back into him. One hand slipped across your cheek and the other to the curve of your back, he led his tongue temporarily into a glide beside your own as you set your hand to his chest. 
“Easy there, tiger…”
“Do you really expect me to be able to keep my hands to myself?” But you were quick to notice this sudden need for public affection had existed as he would feign focus to you, while his eyes truly fell just over your shoulder. 
“Pope…”
“See you…” Your partner spoke as you waved, noticing the look he gave Pope, but more annoyed with your boyfriend than you had been in prior instances of this topic. You had reassured him in countless conversations, validating that even if you danced with someone else, that was all it was. But to him, your words meant nothing when paired with the look of a need to ravage you by the man you decided to dance with. 
“I love you but I hate that you have to dance with HIM…” He confessed, letting out a sigh while taking a seat on the bench set before the wall of mirrors. You thought of offering to quit as you hated seeing him this upset, but before you would be able to utter this option, another idea made its way across your mind. 
“Come here…” You extended your hand as only his eyes lifted to you, analyzing you, as you offered your hand once more. 
“What are-”
“You are going to dance with me…” 
“I’d rather just watch you-”
“Maybe later…But for now, I’m going to prove to you why you have nothing to worry about. So stand up.” You directed as he would groan before you carried his hands to their respective positioning before using the remote in the band of your skirt to restart the song. A passionless exchange comprised of limited eye contact and matter-of-fact movements endured and delivered for the sake of the song, bringing it to a lackluster finish. 
“THAT is how I dance with him…For the song…for the moment…” You lowered his hand to the curve of your ass, teasing his lips with a brush of your own, before changing to a different song by Hozier, ‘Movement’ playing in the background, as you led this new dance. 
The first motions were simply an excuse to be close to one another as you felt the rush of his heartbeat synchronize with your own. But by the first chorus, you found a style of dance all your own as this one was deprived of lust and love joined together in this expression of rolled hips and closing proximity. Yet your dominace would waver as you felt him begin to take control, your body spun while he guided your leg to come between his own and slide against he wooden floor beneath you, making you dip and bend before him, his nose making a descent down between your breasts, over your navel, and resting at the tease of your clothed sex, only to rise back up through the same path, and teasing your lips. You always loved to dance with him, done more so during nights in the club or playful sways and shifts in your shared apartment, but there was something unique all its own when he would take control. 
“And THIS is how I dance with you-” He would interrupt you by pulling you into him while walking you both against the glass until your back came to a rest against its reflective surface. 
“Pope, someone could hear us..”
“I hope they do…” Before you could rationalize your modesty over your hormones, he was on his knees, your skirt pulled into a fist and at rest just above your navel, before his tongue began its own tango through your sex. Quickly, your fingers ran lines through his hair, tugging and tracing as he continued. 
"Roll your hips into me, baby…" He ordered, guiding them at first, before you obeyed on your own. A temporary smirk began these movements until the only thing to remain had been a pace made all your own. But as your motions would make it difficult to keep his target looked, he then moved deeper into you, forearm stretched across your hips, before his fingers pulled your clitoral hood apart. 
"Pope…I'm…" 
"Don't gotta tell me baby…I'm drowning in you…" Your eyes found his looking up between your thighs. 
"And I want more-" You were consumed entirely by him. Two fingers plummeting into you as his tongue was delivering those wicked flicks to your clit. 
"Please Pope…I want you-"
"Say it again for me baby…Louder this time…"
"I want you, Pope!" Your plea reverberated through the bones of the aged building as he was quick to appease you. Lifting you against the glass for only a moment for stability, he would continue to kiss you until his own patience was transparent, at best. 
You were laid on the bench on the far side of the room, his eyes devouring you as his hands took his time. Taking your leg over his shoulder, he kisses from your ankle, unbuckling the strap of your character dance shoes, moved to the seam of your thigh, before repeating the process in a complete soft tease. 
"Wait…" You pressed your hand on his chest, guiding him to stand, pulling off his jeans and boxers, before you positioned him to sit on the bench. Straddling over him, you took him between your thighs, dripping and needy for what now traced your opening. 
"Jesus, you're killing me baby-"
"I just want to make sure you understand you have no reason to be jealous, Pope. You are all that I want…you…" You took your lips to his ear. "And this cock…" You sank into him. 
"It's yours baby. All yours." His hand came to the back of your neck, "Just like you are all mine." You nodded before he lofted you in assistance while you tried to bring him as close to you as possible. Nails digging into his back left bare from a shirt disposed of sometime soon after initial penetration, cries to pleasure were expressed from your tense jaw exile his lips were feverish to your neck and lips, feasting on whatever he could as you built to that mutual crescendo. 
"Pope!"
"Give me those hips-" He growled, his face contorting into pleasure while buried into your shoulder, fingers leaving marks on your hips, as he rooted you in place following those final thrusts. 
"He might be able to guide my hips, but only you get to be the reason they roll, Pope."
"I love you, baby."
"I love you, too, Pope."
Taglist: @hopebaker @iovdrew @penny4yourthoughts @magnificantmermaid @pickingviolets @lovedetlost @trikigirl271 @maybankslover @slut4starkey @slvtherinseeker @obxiskewl @obxxrxfes @bluesongbird @slut-era @ailee-celeste @rafesbae
35 notes ¡ View notes
kiridarling ¡ 4 years ago
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𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐂!
izuku midoriya | tw!guns, single mom!reader, bouncer!izuku, domestic stuffs, tit sucking, mommy!calling ah, AND daddy!calling oh my, breeding kink, breaking the bed (futon). minors dni!
— 5.4k words
“When’s the last time someone touched you like this, hmm?”
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The alley is dark.
There's a disconcerting feeling as you step deeper into the quiet darkness,
You turn to look at the door you entered this dank place from, but it's just as dark and grimy as the walls. You're almost positive that if you rested a hand against them, it would return pitch black, and if you stood in one spot for more than five minutes, the sticky booze would glue your heels to the floor. You're surprised when it doesn't.
"Hand over your wallet and no one gets hurt, pretty lady."
He's a smarmy looking bastard and as thin as they come. It’s clear this isn’t something he does on the regular, the pointed gun quivering so much you worry a trembling might slip and pull the trigger. And you fucking freeze, blood running below zero and heart plummeting because why you?
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And fuck, you’ve got a kid at home with a babysitter, and there are many outcomes to this situation, none of them too cute.
"I said hand it over," he grunts, pressing forwards. Your back hits the grimy brick wall as your eyes dart to the mouth of the alley, where life continues, where cars race past, but no one sees a damn thing. Fuck. Fuck.
And it's not like you have much—hell, you may be a mother, but you know how to party. You squeeze your eyes shut, grip tightening around your purse as you clumsily fumble through it and the man steps closer. You toss all you have to his feet. A fucking twenty. He raises an eyebrow before eyeing your watch. He lets out an unimpressed snort.
"That it?"
You nod, taking a shaky step back.
"Well, that ain't fuckin' enough."
There's a click and you're positive it's him turning off the safety. His face twists like he's about to shoot a bullseye, and you squeeze your eyes as tight as they can go.
Until the looming shadow of the stranger disappears, followed by a sound that's distinctly skin on skin. Er—skin on bone.
You don't watch the fight. Frankly, you don't want to, and you still get to hear your protector spew a litany of curses and disrespectful phrases that should really only come from someone's mother. You don't even open your eyes, still screwed shut with a vice grip around your purse and wallet.
"Um, excuse me Miss? Are you alright?"
Your protector's eyes are much bigger than you expect them to be—and green. You realize you remember seeing those eyes, hardened from across the club.
He's hesitant to touch you, hands rising and falling and rising again. Though you suppose a hug seems like it'd be a little abrasive, it also sounds like the exact kind of thing you need right now.
"U-Um, yeah I'm..." you start, before noticing your attackers body bloodied and wrapped like a pretzel on the ground. "...Fine..."
He sounds like he's going to pass out—he doesn't.
"We should um, we should get you home," As he speaks, the greenette shuffles you out of the alley and into the streetlamp light, blinking himself out of something before holding a meaty hand out of formality. "I'm Izuku by the way. Izuku Midoriya."
For such a big guy, Izuku seems rather timid, and yet, seeing him at the entrance with crossed arms in a black tee and a scowl in the club doesn't give you much insight into his personality. Which makes you wonder why he became the club's bouncer in the first place.
"Um, nice to meet you," you nod, trying to suppress the shake in your hands as you take his. "Y/N."
Izuku smiles at that, and even though you're a regular, you've never actually seen him beam on the job. "Cool! Cool, so...um, I don't really feel comfortable letting you walk home...alone..."
You nod—he panics as if you aren't already on board.
"'Cause it's like, a conscience thing, you know? Like, I really won't be able to sleep tonight otherwise," Izuku defends, shoving a clumsy hand in his green curls. "B-But if you don't feel comfortable with it, or something, that's totally fine! I know what you just experienced was horrible, and you probably do—"
"Izuku."
"Yeah?" He perks up. It seems as if the circuit his mind runs finally comes to a stop.
"I'd...feel more comfortable if you walked me home. Too."
Your innards ache at the stiffness in both your voice and figure, but Izuku doesn't seem to notice. Instead, he beams, standing ten feet taller, and you think—yeah. You'd feel much safer if he did.
"O-Okay! Cool!" He confirms a bit stiff himself, and then, in a smoother motion, holds his hand out to take. "Shall we?"
Your red palm claps over his, and you snort quietly, "We shall."
You two walk in a surprisingly comfortable silence for the beginning of the walk—you lead the way and he silently trails behind, glaring daggers at any passerby with lingering eyes as you march on, unknowing.
"So um, do you come to Club 777 often?"
Which is a question you know he knows the answer to, completely aware you almost come every Saturday. But you smile at his attempt to start a conversation anyways, hands tucking underneath your armpits in search of warmth.
"Yeah, sometimes. Just trying to get out and stuff. Y'know, away from the kid."
"I get that," he nods with a smile, before tugging at the hem of his hoodie. "Oh! Are you cold? Here—wait, let me."
He shucks it over your head and your positive it messes up your hair. But you find that you don't care much, especially in favor of the warmth that it provides.
And then, "You have a kid?"
"Yep," you say, tucking your fists into the jacket pockets. "A big two-year-old potato waits for me back home."
"Oh," Izuku chortles at your description before tucking his hands into his jean pockets too. Licking his lips, his eyes dart to the street, "I...assume your boyfriend watches him for the night? Or husband or whoever."
"Uhm, not quite," you chuckle towards your feet, though it's a touch acrid. Izuku picks up on it immediately.
"Oh I'm so sorr—I didn't kno—"
"It's fine, Izuku really—"
"I—but I shouldn't even be assuming what if you had a wife or girlfriend or—" he takes a second to gasp, and your eyes widen in fear that he'll choke, "—or if they're nonbinary or—"
"Izuku," you knock him on the shoulder and he finally shuts up. "It's fine. I get it all the time."
He falters, but at least he seems to relax. "Really?"
"Yes," you giggle behind a hand, and the greenette smiles at it.
"O-Okay, cool."
Flecks of gold swim in Izuku's green irises and you find yourself noticing them now, suppressing the urge to advance closer for a better look. You stare long enough to watch his smile relax into a comfortable line, but you snap out of it once he kicks a rock, the sound of the gravel skittering across the floor tugging you out of your reverie.
"I'm not very good with kids, y'know," he says as an afterthought. You snort.
"Really?"
"Yeah, I mean," he scratches the back of his neck sheepishly. "Like what am I supposed to feed it? French fries?"
"Toddlers aren't it's, Izu." You can't tell if he flushes from the nickname or from what you said, but either way, it's enough to prompt another laugh. "And maybe start with baby food?"
"Ah," Izuku nods, and you guide him in turning a corner. "That would make sense.
"It would."
By the time you stop in front of your red front door, it's almost three am. You figure you caught Izuku right after he got off work, if the cheesy All Might sweatshirt you're wearing is any evidence of that, but either way, he looks like he's about to fall flat on his face.
"You can stay for the night, if you want," you offer, albeit meekly, and Izuku lifts two hands with insistence.
"Oh! No no no please, I'm fine," he shakes his head so quickly his curls bounce in a flurry, and you genuinely worry he's going to pass out when he tries to blink himself awake. "Just...not used to staying up this late is all."
"Then stay," you offer with a shrug, and your orange porch light flickers. "It's the least I can do. I've got a bed and a futon, and I'm fine with sleeping on either."
"I..." Izuku's green eyes flicker towards your door before back to you, "I really shouldn't. I'm a stranger an—"
"And I'm offering."
Izuku's eyebrows fold with the dilemma, but you grab his hand with a tug and a smile, while your free one shoves the keys into the door. "C'mon. Let's get you some rest, yeah?"
You can't tell if Izuku blushes or if it's just the lighting, but either way, his chest inflates in protest before deflating in resignation.
"Okay."
With a smile, you turn the doorknob. Your door has always taken some shoulder to get open, so you don't hesitate in shoving your collarbone into the hardwood. Izuku cringes at the sight.
"Mama!"
Your hit in the legs first, nearly stumbling back with a quiet oof. You look down to see Max wrapped around your legs like you're a fucking jungle gym, grinning with two missing teeth and a bandaid over his nose.
It's three am.
"I'm done," your babysitter grunts. "He doesn't listen when I tell him to bathe, eat, anything—I fucking quit."
And with that, they slam the door behind them, house rattling under the pressure. You sigh. There goes another one. Fuck.
"Well that wasn't very nice," Izuku grumbles under his breath disapprovingly. You smile at the arms crossed over his chest until Max peeks around your legs to see...
"A new daddy?"
"I—no, baby," you fight the embarrassment (and the urge to say you fucking wish) by picking the little one up by his armpits, smiling when he thrusts his hands in the air and goes weee! After he's comfortably cradled in your arms, you say, "He's just staying the night."
"Like daddy did!" Max defends with a giggle before rushing the greenette with open arms. Izuku just looks at you with a shrug before kneeling to take a hug to the chest as Max chants, "New daddy! New daddy!"
And, well. There's no stopping him now.
You peel your heels off your cramping feet and sigh at the fucking freedom, toes uncurling from the scrunched position it feels like they've been holding the entire night. You curse under your breath when you realize since Max is awake you've got to put him to bed too, and honestly, if you knew this babysitter was going to be just as useless as the others, you would've just let Max run fucking free while you lived life for a few hours. Not like that outcome would be any better.
"Alright Maxie, c'mon."
You take him away from his celebration with the greenette and though he pouts, he allows his mother to gather him in her arms.
"Do you um, need help?"
You turn to see Izuku awkwardly shifting in the doorway from the request, hands behind his back with pursed lips. You shake your head.
"Oh no, it's fine. I just have to put him down really quickly and then I'll be—"
"Mama, I'm hungry. I want chicken nuggies." Max loops his arms around your neck and tugs so hard you worry about your bones. You shake your head with a sigh and a pout.
"It's too late for you to be up, bud. You can have chicken nuggies for lunch tomorrow. Sound like a plan?"
But goodness. In this state, it'll take hours for him to relax—and you still have to unfold the futon for Izuku.
Max whines and kicks his legs but doesn't say no, meaning he's not really that hungry, he just wants to stay awake. "But—but what if new daddy's gone in the morning like the last one?"
Fuck.
"Max," you sigh, giving him a light shake so his matching eyes look into you yours. You speak a little softer, "Izuku's not your new daddy, okay? He's a houseguest."
Max's face drops. "Not eve—"
"No, Maxie," you sigh, squeezing him on the shoulder. "Now let's go to bed, okay?"
"I can—I can put him down if you'd like! So you can get into something more comfortable and stuff. I mean, I've never worn a dress but sweats are so much better, you know? Or shorts, or...whatever you wear to sleep."
You understand the many points he's trying to get across, one being that's he's not a creep, just a nice guy, and you suppose you and Max can live in your "new daddy" fantasy for a little longer. Even if you know this one will be gone by morning.
"Um, okay yeah," you say, voice a little thin, before handing your child over to the greenette—who bounces into his arms excitedly. "I'll be back, then? His room is down the hall to the right. The one with the race car bed."
Izuku's eyes narrow as he processes your directions. "Down the hall to the right—okay! I'll just go take this little guy to bed, then."
"Okay, thank you," you nearly bow, because Izuku just saved both of you so much time and he doesn't even understand how. "Oh! And good luck."
"Good...luck?"
"Yep!" You say with a wink and a pat on the back before scooping your heels and booking it back to your bedroom with a cackle. Time to get out of this dress. Fucking finally.
You realize that being alone is much more unsettling when you've had a gun held to your head today.
Every little noise just seems off, like it could belong to something more than it actually does, even the silence; you find yourself shoving your head through your t-shirt abnormally fast, eyes blinking to take a survey of the room to ensure that you're alone. You are. It's fine.
And that's what you tell yourself when you close your eyes to run a wet rag over your face, and again with the dry one. All of a sudden, you don't like the way your bathroom window faces the open backyard nor do you like how dark it is outside. You don't like how big your bed looks, and goddammit, you haven't even gotten into it yet.
Pushing all uneasy thoughts aside, you stumble out of your bedroom with a fresh face and a new outfit, stilling in Max's doorway when the greenette doesn't notice you. Resting against the frame with crossed arms, you smile.
"I do so like green eggs and ham! Thank you! Thank you, Sam-I-am. You know, when I was a kid I—oh, he's asleep."
Izuku tucks the snoring boy in his lap under the covers with a gentle grin, pulling them underneath his chin. The greenette takes a second, watches Max's chest rise and fall a few times, before ruffling the tuft of hair on his head with a snort, and walking away.
You don't even think Izuku sees you until he practically sashays out the door, winking, "Good luck, huh?"
To say you go red in the face from that is an understatement.
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"How do you do this?"
"Do what?" You ask as you pulling the futon in your living room forwards. Izuku yawns before gesturing to the clock with a shake of his head.
"Take care of a kid, and work, and go to a bar every Saturday evening? It's four am, and something tells me you've been up for a while. I'm practically dead and I wake up at one pm every day!"
You chuckle at that, jumping on the bed with your hands and knees to ensure its lays flat...and ensure that it won't make an Izuku sandwich at seven in the morning. "You build up stamina after a while, I guess."
"No shit," he gestures to you as you utilize the entire length of your body to put the sheets on the mattress. He would help, but you told him no, insisting that he'd only make this take longer. "Are you sure you do—"
"Nope," you huff, clapping your hands together. "I'm done."
Izuku blinks at the made bed, to you, to the made bed again, and then back to you with wide eyes.
"Mommy magic."
"I—" you blink towards the ceiling to see if that even makes sense, but you figure fuck it, it's four am, with a snort. "Yeah, sure. Whatever you want to call it."
In reality, you feel like you're about to pass out.
"Um, so I don't really have pj pants and I don't think you'll have any that'll fit, so..."
"Yeah no, I definitely burned all the shit my ex left—"
"Aha okay, cool, um, so just boxers...are fine...?"
He looks down at his black jeans and back to you, raising an eyebrow. You toss a nonchalant shrug in return, and you hate to say it, but your inner school girl goes—dick outline.
"O-Okay, then," Izuku says, and you watch his hands curl around the waistband. "I'm just gonna—"
He shucks his pants so hard they hit the floor, and your eyes widen because...well...looks like he's just gonna do it then.
Until Izuku's hands rush to cover his crotch (which you weren't peeking at, you weren't) and you realize that maybe you should've stepped out of the room or something.
"U-Um—that was fast—"
"I thought—thought you were going to uhm, turn around," he flushes, a funny contrast to the way his muscles fold under that black shirt, and your feet move to turn around like he ordered you to do it.
"Sorry! So sorry," you try to apologize, but now his dick print is burned in your brain, and...it isn't that bad.
"It—It's fine! I'm in the bed now so, you can turn around."
You laugh awkwardly and scuffle to turn, as you do, and Izuku beams at you from the bed with a wave.
"Hi," he says, his lower half-tucked under the covers. You wave back.
"Hi."
Izuku's eyes dart to you living room tv before the come back to you. "So uhm, I guess this is goodnight?"
"Oh right," you perk up at that, hands rubbing the sides of your thighs like there's something on them. "Time to go to bed, right?"
"Uh, yeah!" He nods, chest shuddering before he says, "so uh, sweet dreams?"
You smile tight at the kind gesture, and your hands opt to pull at the hem of your shirt instead, eyes drifting to an old pile of records you haven't regarded in months. "Thanks! You...too?"
Izuku smiles, though his eyes drift, "Yeah..."
You beam back. You figure you should probably go now, or something, until you think of something and slam a fist into your palm. "Oh! Also, I meant to thank you for saving me. I'm not sure if I did that. Did I do that?"
The greenette shrugs, "Uh, I think so?"
"Okay! Okay. Cool," you nod, flashing a tight smile. "Mmk. Night Izuku."
"G'night."
And see, you would move—except it seems as if your feet are glued to the floor and won't move no matter how hard you try, to the point where it feels like your straining and they're going numb, and yet you're still staring at Izuku's pretty fucking face.
"C'mon," he chuckles, scooting over on the futon to make extra space for you. "If you take all day, the beds gonna get cold, and then I'm going to have to crawl into yours like a creep."
"Oh my fucking god," you snort one breath and move to flick off the lights before stumbling through the darkness for the futon. "You're so weird."
"Weird in a good way, I hope," he lifts the blanket and you slide under—and swear your knee grazes his before it's snatched away.
"There's no weird in a bad way," you say once you've settled comfortably, tucking your hands under your head as you lay on your stomach. Izuku mimics your position, though he takes up much more of the blanket, and you find that it drapes over you like a tent over his shoulders. Neither of you close your eyes, for some reason.
"Hi," Izuku whispers.
"Hi," you smile back.
"Okay," he huffs, face twisting in determination, "Now it's goodnight."
"Right," you nod, but your eyes don't close. "Goodnight. Of course."
"Don't let the bedbugs bite," he says with a chuckle, and you can't tell if his eyes flicker to your lips or if you imagine it. Either way, you look them just in case.
"I better not have bedbugs," you snort. "I clean this place like a motherfucker."
Izuku's nose twitches at that with a nod. Moonlight pours into your living room and colors his pale skin silver, though you figure it won't take the sun much longer to color it a strawberry pink. "You really do. It's...different when it's quiet."
"Yeah," you agree, placing your hands on his chest. It shudders under your palms. "Kinda personal, huh?"
"Mhm," he nods, and though his hands wrap around your wrists, they never pull them away. You lift an eyebrow.
"A bad personal?"
Izuku doesn't hesitate, breath nearly ghosting your lips as he says, "Hardly."
"Would you..." now it's your chests turn to shudder, and sliding a hand up to play with his ear, you bite the bullet. "Like to get more personal?"
Izuku's lips melt into a grin against yours, "I'd love to."
His lips are softer than you thought.
Maybe because you assumed all of him was a bumbling mess, including his chapstick application; but they're fucking pillow-soft, and you don't realize how deprived you are until his hold around your body turns from protective to sensual and you melt from his heat.
"Fuck," Izuku huffs between kisses, growling when your grip around his neck tightens. "Watching you from across the club for weeks can do a thing to a guy's patience, you know."
"Oh?" You snort as he presses enthusiastic open-mouthed kisses down the column of your neck, hot and wet, and painful once his teeth dig into your collarbone. "A-Ah, Izuku—no marks."
"O-Oh! Sorry," he pulls away, lips red and swollen, and shiny with spit. You smile at the reaction.
"'S okay, Baby," you giggle at the speed to which his muscles go lax, and his eyes droop to your chest when you scratch the back of his head.
"Can I—can I suck your tits?"
He asks so bashfully it's nearly innocent, and you find your eyes dropping to your chest along with his before you're ditching his All Might sweatshirt all together.
"God," Izuku's eyes flutter as he gathers your breasts in both palms, groaning at the sight. "They're fucking perfect."
You shudder as his thumb ghosts a nipple, and Izuku dips an experimental hand under your lacy bra and pinches. Hard.
Your thighs jolt and hands fist the sheets, and a moan comes from the back of your throat before you can stop it. Izuku's hand rocket to cover your mouth.
"Shh—you don't wanna wake him up, do you?"
You shake your head, but it's hard to keep quiet when your nipples are as sensitive as they are. Izuku doesn't seem like he really means that statement, though, lowering his head with a devilish grin as if he knows that for himself.
“Sensitive, Mommy?”
“O-Oh um,” you flush at the nickname, and even more so when his lips close around your nipple and suck. Tangling a hand in his hair, you sigh, “Yeah, a little.”
Izuku hums at that, eyes fluttering to watch you bite your bottom lip in a poor attempt to muffle a moan, hissing as his teeth dig into the hardened bud. He pulls off with a slurp and moves to the other, but not without a few kisses across your chest.
“When’s the last time someone touched you like this, hmm?” Izuku nearly growls out before biting into the opposite nipple, and you shudder as he dips a scarred hand down the waistband of your shorts and panties. He chuckles after sliding a finger through your slit. “So wet for me.”
“It—It’s been a second,” you sigh, grip tightening around his shoulders as he slides a finger in. Even Izuku has to bite a lip at your tightness in anticipation, mouth descending over your nipple once more to send frissons of fire up your spine.
“No shit,” he grunts around your nipple, curling his finger. You gasp. “Think I can fit another one in there?”
“Why don’t you try?” You giggle, but it dissipates into nothing but air as he does, his two fingers filling you up enough to elicit a sigh.
“How’s that?” He breathes, face hovering over yours. As your hands coil around his neck, his free one reaches for your inner thigh and pulls it back far enough to give him a better angle as he presses you into the mattress.
“Good, it’s good,” you nod, and your hips start to move on their own, bucking forwards as if there’s any more finger left for you to fuck. (Spoiler: there’s not.)
“Good,” he breathes, eyes going glossy as he watches you writhe under him. You're positive that you're carving painful red lines into his back, but considering the way his eyebrows fold every time you do, makes you wonder if he doesn't mind. "Fuck I can't wait to fuck you—I can fuck you, right?"
"No Izuku, I'm just letting you finger me for fu-u—fuck."
He slides in a third finger and for some reason, it burns a little—but the burn only makes your eyes roll further, and he's stuffing you with a chuckle.
"What was that?"
"I-I—you're not pla—playing very fair," you huff, chest shuddering as he tilts your hips higher for a better angle. You suppress a scream when his fingers curl, jolting forwards at such a speed it makes the futon creak. Izuku tightens his grip around your waist to keep you from going too far.
"No one said anything about being fair, Mommy," he teases, and you whine when he removes his fingers, tapping them against your lips. "C'mon, you gotta get 'em wet so I can fuck you, right?"
You nod at the idea, enjoying the idea of being filled up much more, and coat his fingers to the point where they're dripping when he pulls him out. Izuku's chest rumbles.
"So good for me," he purrs, using your spit to coat his cock before he's sliding his head between your folds—you shiver, grabbing onto his back again. "Ready?"
“Mhm,” you nod, spreading your legs further—though you swear they do that on their own.
“Oh my, you’re um...tight...”
You whimper from the stretch and look between your legs, eyes widening upon seeing that Izuku’s much bigger than you had anticipated. Or had been warned of.
“F-Fuck, I can’t—“
“Shhhh, it’s okay, just a little more, okay?” Izuku nearly whispers into your lips as his hands move to rub your shuddering sides. Your eyes screw shut, “Jus’ a little more, Mommy...”
Izuku pushes deeper and you’re being split in half—because what else could that burn be—but you’ll admit, the feeling of accomplishment you receive once he bottoms out is surreal.
“Good—Good girl,” Izuku’s nearly quivering and plants his hands on both sides of your head with a huff.
“I-Izu,” you whimper as he starts to move, feeling impossibly full no matter how far he pulls out. Izuku shudders, mouth rounding into an ‘o’ when his hips slowly start to gain rhythm, and though it’s loud, you know the creak of the futon is unavoidable. You squeal as his head hammers into your cervix, pulling out a wanton Daddy before you have half a mind to shut the fuck up. You nearly freeze, and yet, all Izuku’s hips do is speed up.
“Yeah? Want me to be your new Daddy?” He moans, and you dig your nails into his back with a nod. The greenette curses at that, biting his bottom lip and his hand drops between your legs to rub at your clit. With thighs seizing around his waist, you slam a hand over your mouth to keep yourself quiet.
“Fuck—I make you feel that good, Mommy?” Izuku nearly wheezes, eyes suppressing the urge to screw closed, “So good you can’t keep your pretty mouth shut?”
“Y-Yeah, I—“ you gasp when he lifts your hips off the bed for a better angle, hands fisting the sheets. “Harder, Daddy—“
“Oh Mommy, if I go any harder I think I might break this bed,” he says, borderline bashful, but you find yourself saying fuck the bed as your hips buck in search of a feeling he refuses to give you. Izuku’s chuckle strains as he says, “So needy, Mommy. You that needy for my cum?”
Clawing at his back, you try your damnest to stutter out a yes. Izuku chuckles at your desperation before he cuts himself off with a groan, eyes rocketing to where you’re both connected as you tighten around him.
“F-Fill me up, I wanna—“
“You want another baby, Mommy?” Izuku pants, and you’re so close you start to feel a buzz in your thighs, praying he isn’t too far behind. You nod vehemently with a gasp and his lips slide into an exhausted smile, "Fuck, of course you do—and you’re gonna take me so well, aren’t you? All of it.”
Izuku finishes his sentence with a growl, pressing you further into the mattress—it squeaks like a squeaky wheel, and when it thunks a level lower both of you yelp, the back of the futon thumping on your hardwood floor with each thrust.
“Told ya,” Izuku wheezes, eyes scrunching in a chuckle. You return it.
“It—It’s old anyway,” you reply, but your eyebrows fold as quickly as they unfold from the crash. The creaking futon increases in pitch as his hips pick up the pace, “Fuck—fuck Izuku I’m gonna cum.”
“What’s my name?” The greenette challenges, and you find yourself shivering at the dominance he exudes. The finger on your clit disappears and you whine, knowing damn well you can’t cum without it.
“Daddy—Daddy please—“
“Good—fuck, so good for me,” his hand returns to your clit and you sigh at the feeling. As the coil in your gut threatens to snap, his hips speed up, and Izuku pants, “We’re gonna cum together, yeah? Cum with me Mommy, c’mon—“
“Fuck!” You drag red lines down Izuku’s back as you quake under the weight of your orgasm, broken bed whining as Izuku thrusts all his weight into you. Digging his teeth into your shoulder, the greenette cums with a broken moan, hips stuttering into yours for the final time that night.
The room fills with a comfortable silence, minus the panting, and Izuku rolls onto the mattress next to you with a bounce. It creaks, whines, and then drops again, catching both you and the greenette by surprise. (Again.)
“I think—I think we broke it,” Izuku says towards the ceiling as he catches his breath. You giggle at that, hands laid across your sweaty stomach, and turn to him with your head in the pillow.
“Gives me an excuse to buy a new one,” you say with a shrug. Izuku chuckles back.
“I guess,” he teeters his head to both sides. “I can...also pitch in, if you want. Since I broke the thing. Technically.”
His offer sounds apprehensive as if he’s encroaching in your space, as if he hasn’t been all up in your space less than a minute ago. You smile. “I’d like that a lot, actually. Thanks.”
"And um, breakfast? I mean," he snorts, though it seems rather defensive, and his eyes rocket to the ticking clock on your wall. Your eyes follow: five am. "I mean—fuck um, I feel like this might be weird but I think you're cool? Um, yeah, so breakfast, I can make it if you want because you're so busy being motherly and stuff and plus, it's Sunday but again, if you don't wan—"
"Izuku," you giggle, wrapping your arms around his gut with a little squeeze. "Breakfast sounds nice."
The greenette beams and his chest stutters. "O-Okay cool! Cool, cool. Breakfast then?"
You snort, driving your palm into his face to shut him the fuck up. "Goodnight, Izuku."
Izuku giggles, getting the message, and coils his arms around your shoulders to provide a comfort you haven't felt in a very, very long time.
"G'night Mommy."
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in a span of three months | joshua hong
ミ★ synopsis: in which you teach joshua how to live.
ミ★ genre: strangers to lovers!au, terminally ill!reader, angst, fluff, some humor
ミ★ warnings: mentions of depression (not mentioned heavily), implied suicidal thoughts and intention (very brief), major character death
ミ★ word count: 20,351
ミ★ pairings: joshua hong x gender neutral reader
ミ★ notes: hi guys ! here’s the longest oneshot i’ve ever written so i’d like to apologize in advance BSJKGBDKB i just wanted to mention that this isn’t necessarily realistic before you go into it, and that the reader’s illness is not mentioned in this oneshot as i didn’t want to explicitly list one. i hope you guys enjoy this oneshot, it’s my best work and i put a lot of time and effort into it <3
ミ★ taglist: @coppertrashi @magicalhannie @brinnalaine @minluvly @wonunuu @suhfluffy @shuajeong @euphorencia @imjustuhhvibing​ @minghao-will-be-the-death-of-me @shuahaeee @jaeyuni @sunflowergyeomie
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january 2, 2021 
The date flashes back at you from your lockscreen, and a breath escapes you as you turn off your phone. Your leg bounces against the floor in anxiousness as you wait for him to tell you the results from your recent test.
“I’m sorry, yn.” You slowly look up towards your doctor, seeing the grave expression on his face. Your grip on the chair tightens when he folds his hands together, turning towards you. 
“We estimate that you only have three more months to live. We will give you medication…” The rest of his words are tuned out as your gaze falls down to the table, the sound of your heartbeat is loud against your ears. You bite the inside of your cheek, listening to it thrum. 
I’m dying, yet I can feel my heartbeat right now. I can hear it. It’s beating.
I’m alive.
You stand up from your chair when Dr. Park does, and you give him as bright of a smile as you can muster when you bow towards him. He stares at you with pity in his eyes, and you hate it.
You hate it so much.
“Eat whatever you want, do things you’ve always wanted to do. Live your life, yn. I’ll see you at your next appointment.” Dr. Park tells you, and you nod your head. Giving him a small smile, you grab your bag and walk out of the room, tightly squeezing the strap as you exit the hospital.
Once outside, you suck in a deep breath of air, having felt as if you were suffocating in that building the longer you were in it. Rubbing the back of your neck, you look over towards the Han River, seeing the Banpo bridge shine brightly during the night. 
Letting out a sigh, you head in the direction of the bridge, deciding to walk home rather than take the bus like you usually do. Your heart remains heavy as you look around at your surroundings, wondering what you should do during your last few months of living. 
It’s strange.
Having a known deadline on your own life.
As you make it onto the bridge, you turn your head to look out along the Han River as you walk. The slight wind from the water breezes past you during the night, and you somehow find that it’s the only thing able to calm you down from the raging storm within you. Letting out a small smile, you notice how pretty Seoul is at night.
With the city lights shining brightly back at you, the busy streets roaring with life even during the relatively late hours. The bright stars glowing down from the sky, surrounding the beautiful moon that reflects its light across the Han River. 
“Ah, life is beautiful.” You mutter softly, turning your head and looking forward. You raise an eyebrow when you see a blonde head of hair standing in front of the railing along the bridge, just staring out at the water. Coming to a stop, you stare at the person a few feet from you, wondering what they’re doing. 
Your eyes trail down to see his hands gripping the railing tightly, and you tilt your head at the sight. Taking a few steps forward, the man seems to have not noticed your presence. He just looks out across the water with a blank stare, the whites of his knuckles becoming more prominent when he tightens his grip again. At this point, you decide to interrupt.
“Hi.” You greet cheerfully, and the guy blinks out of his dazed state from the sound of your voice. He slowly turns his head towards you, and you feel warmth flood your face immediately at how ethereal this man is.
His platinum hair falls softly over his forehead, wisps of it flying up slightly due to the light wind. His deerlike eyes stare into yours, and you find that they emphasize his beautiful features that much more. However, the exhaustion is evident in his gaze.
“Hey.” The stranger replies, voice soft and airy, somehow matching his appearance even though he seems tired. 
“What are you doing?” You ask, stepping forward so that you’re now right beside him. His eyes widen slightly, before they relax to their normal size. He shrugs his shoulders, glancing over at the road when a car drives by. “Just standing on the bridge.”
You give him a close-lipped smile, tilting your head as you press on, “Why?” 
“Just cause.” 
You nod your head, turning around so that you can rest your forearms onto the railing. Raising your hand up, you rest your chin on the palm of your hand, letting out a sigh of content as you lay eyes on the beautiful scenery once again. The ethereal man turns to glance at you, wondering what you could possibly want.
“Live your life.” You say in a soft tone, and he simply blinks at you.
“What?” 
You turn your head towards the pretty man, “Life is short when you think about it. It can suck a lot of the time, as well as be unfair, but sometimes…” 
Your voice trails off as you look up at the stars, realizing just how small you are in this great, big universe. “Sometimes it can be beautiful.” 
The stranger tilts his head up and stares at the sky along with you, a comfortable silence settling over the two of you as you do so.
“I wish I could see it like you do.” You look over at him, finding that he’s still staring up at the sky. His breath is visible due to the cold temperatures, and you watch as he lets out a sigh. He turns towards you, giving you a heartbreaking smile, “Life hasn’t been kind to me.” 
The two of you stare into each other's eyes for a moment, and you find that you’re more similar than you originally thought. You feel the exact same way about life, and you’ve asked life for years, why you? Why did it have to be you? 
You could never find the answer.
And so, you smile at the stranger, who tilts his head at you, wondering how one can be so bright and cheerful. You reach into your pocket and pull out your phone, handing it towards him after you unlock it. He raises an eyebrow as he reaches out and takes it, “You know I could totally just take this and run, right?” 
You nod your head, letting out a quiet giggle that rings in the blonde’s ears. He finds the sound to be rather pleasant. “I know, but I have a feeling you’re not that type of person.”
He purses his lips, nodding his head in agreement. Glancing down at the cellular device, he sees your wallpaper, a photo of you holding a cat with a big smile on your face. His eyes trail back up towards your face, as if to ask what you want him to do with your phone. 
You sigh with a teasing look on your face, and you take the phone from his grasp, opening up the contacts menu before holding it back out towards him. “Put your number in.” 
The blonde’s eyes widen slightly, before he tentatively types in his number, handing it back to you. You grasp the phone in your hand, a breath leaving your lips when you finally learn his name.
“Why do you want my number?” He asks, and you look up from your phone, giving your new friend a smile. 
“Since life hasn’t been kind to you, I wanted to be.” You answer simply, and he stares into your eyes with an indecipherable emotion to them at your answer. 
After a moment, he turns his body towards the railing of the bridge again, staring out at the city without saying anything else. You follow suit, resting your forearms onto the cool metal as you breathe in the fresh air. 
“My name is yn.” You tell him in a soft voice, not expecting a response. A few minutes pass when you finally hear his voice say,
“My name is Joshua.” 
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Joshua taps the eraser of his pencil onto his notebook, blankly staring off at the projector screen while he tunes out everything the professor is saying. The only thing on his mind is you, the person he met last week on the bridge. 
You haven’t contacted him yet, and he’s beginning to wonder if you were just a figment of his imagination. That deep down, he wanted to stay, so his consciousness created a positive person to appear right before him, convincing him to live another day.
“Yn.” Joshua whispers underneath his breath, and he tilts his head to the side, having not realized how nice your name was until this very moment. He only pays attention to the lecture when his professor announces the homework, and he quickly jots down the page numbers to read. Throwing his bag over his shoulder, he steps out of the auditorium and begins to walk off campus. 
Some university students would usually go and meet up with their friends after class to go and eat, or they’d go and meet their significant other to study together. Then there’s Joshua, who does neither of those things. 
“Hey Josh.” The blonde nods his head at his boss in greeting, letting the door close behind him as he walks over into the back to change. 
Everyday Joshua just goes through the motions, doing what he has to do to survive, as dramatic as that sounds. Go to uni, work a six hour shift to pay for his tuition, head home and study, then barely sleep. He wakes up the next day and does it all over again. 
Joshua has gotten used to the feeling of being numb.
He tiredly ties the apron onto his waist before going and washing his hands. The call of his name makes him glance up from the floor as he wipes his hands on a paper towel, his boss appears at the doorway, holding the notepad and pen towards him.
Joshua sends him a tight smile, stepping forward and taking the pen and paper from his hand. He feels himself get a pat on the back as his manager walks past him, and he lets out a breath, before walking out into the restaurant. 
His eyes trail over to two women seated at a booth, waiting for their orders to be taken. Joshua doesn’t feel like going over there yet, as the words you told him that night ring in his head. 
Live your life. 
Joshua scoffs quietly, remembering the bright smile you showed him. He looks down at the notepad in his hand, wondering how you could find life to be so beautiful when he’s never seen it that way. His head snaps up when he hears his name be called, and he immediately walks over to the table, clicking open the pen.
“Hi. What can I get started for you guys today?” 
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“One sikhye please!” The woman nods her head at you, and you smile as you hand her the correct amount of money. She hands you your order number, and you walk over to the other side of the food stand, waiting to be called.
Your hands make their way into your pockets, your hand wrapping around your phone. Tilting your head, you remember the pretty blonde you met on the bridge. You suck in a deep breath of the cool air, looking up towards the sky to catch the beginning of the sunset. A smile makes its way onto your face at the different pink and orange hues of the sky.
You fail to notice the blonde head of hair looking in your direction, wondering how you always manage to have a smile on your face. It’s only when you feel that tingly feeling of someone staring at you that you look back down, turning your head to find those deerlike eyes boring into yours.
Your mouth drops open in surprise, and you grin happily, raising your hand up and waving towards the ethereal man. 
“Hi Jos-” You’re cut off when your order number gets called, and you hold up a finger at the blonde to signal him to wait, before quickly grabbing your sikhye and walking over to him. 
“Hi Joshua.” You finally greet properly, taking a tiny sip of the sweet rice drink as he stares at you quietly. He clicks his tongue, tilting his head at you, “You never texted me.” 
Pursing your lips at the fact that he was waiting, you slowly hold out the drink in apology. Joshua glances down at it, before looking back at you with a raise to his eyebrow. 
“Don’t you want it?”
“Take my apology drink.”
“But you just ordered this-”
“I can buy another one.” 
The corner of Joshua’s lip quirks up slightly, before he takes the drink from your grasp and takes a sip. You let out a smile, before pointing back towards the drink stand, “I’ll go buy myself another drink and then we can hangout.” 
You’re about to turn around when you feel a hand grasp your wrist, stopping you from walking over. Your eyes slowly glance down, before they trail back up to see Joshua staring at you, straw in his mouth as he takes another sip of the sikhye. 
He lets go of your wrist and walks over to the stand himself, ordering the drink for you. You’re left flabbergasted as he hands the employee his card, and you watch as a blush rises to the woman’s face the longer she communicates with the pretty man. 
Once he’s handed his order number, he walks back towards you, seeing the shocked look on your face. He raises his hand up and waves it in front of your face, and you finally look back into his eyes. 
“Why do you look so shocked?” Joshua asks, slightly biting on the straw as he awaits your response. Your mouth opens and closes, before you just let out a huff, reaching out and hitting Joshua’s arm softly. He still feigns pain, his hand reaching up and rubbing the area.
“Ow.”
You giggle at his reaction, “Thank you for the drink, Joshua. Except now I feel like the apology drink I gave you doesn’t count since you bought me one.” 
Joshua shrugs, looking back over towards the drink stand when he hears your order number be called. He shoots you a glance over his shoulder, “Consider it a gift.”
It’s only when Joshua walks back and hands you the sikhye that you wonder how he’s been doing. You stare at him for a moment as he places the receipt into his wallet, and you find that the darkness under his eyes is still evident. You even think they might be a bit darker than when you first saw him as he looks back up at you. 
“Is something on my face?” Joshua asks when he notices the furrow to your brow. Your eyes widen slightly and you shake your head, giving him a reassuring grin. “I just thought you were handsome.” 
Joshua’s mouth drops open at your honesty, while you internally panic at the fact that that was your coverup for staring at him. You watch as a tinge of pink appears on his cheeks, and you honestly find the sight so endearing that you have to look away. 
“Let’s go to the arcade!” You exclaim, not wanting to acknowledge the fact that you called him handsome as you point towards the colorful arcade down the block. Joshua raises an eyebrow, running a hand through his hair when he nods his head. “Okay.”
The two of you go on your way to the arcade, walking in a relative silence, the sounds of you both taking sips of your sikhye filling the quiet. Joshua pushes open the door for you, and you smile, nodding your head at him. 
“What a gentleman.” The blonde lets out a scoff at the nickname, and you giggle at his reaction once he steps inside after you. You both walk over to the machine that gives you the game card, and you quickly shove your credit card into the slot before Joshua can, effectively paying for the game card the two of you will share.
Joshua rolls his eyes as he takes another sip of his drink, “You should’ve let me pay for it.” 
You don’t respond, instead heading over to the racing games without another word. Joshua pauses when you glance over your shoulder with a smile, “Consider it a gift.” 
He watches as you skip towards the game with the motorcycle, the sight of your bright smile still imprinted in his brain. He shakes his head as if it’ll clear his thoughts, before following after you. 
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Joshua’s head falls back onto his pillows as he stares up at the ceiling of his dark room, the comforter resting over him. 
He’s always had trouble sleeping. It started out by him sleeping later and later as he grew older, until he could only fall asleep at around 4 or 5 in the morning. 
Joshua’s eyes trail over to the window beside him, and he lets out a quiet huff when he sees that the moon isn’t shining back at him. The stars are a bit dim, but they’re still evident in the dark sky. 
He looks back up towards the ceiling, and he closes his eyes when the thought of your smile comes into mind again. 
Joshua glances at you when you let out another giggle, and he finds himself wondering for the nth time how you can be so happy. You rest your head onto his shoulder for a second while you laugh, and he freezes slightly at the contact.
“Your face when I beat you at air hockey was so funny.” You manage to say through your laughing fit, reaching up to cover your mouth with your hand in an attempt to stop more giggles from pouring through. Joshua rolls his eyes playfully, remembering how happy you were when you won the arcade game. 
“Was it really that funny?” Joshua asks, and you nod your head with an incredulous look on your face. He lets out a sigh, placing his hands into his pockets as he looks up towards the night sky. The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, just enjoying the scenery as you calm down from the joys of the arcade. 
You turn your head to look at the blonde, “Did you have fun tonight?” 
The blonde doesn’t respond right away, instead letting his head fall so that he’s now staring at the sidewalk while the two of you walk to the bus stop. You nod, understanding that he probably didn’t enjoy the games as much as you did. 
“It’s okay if you didn’t. I know a few people who don’t actually like arcades-”
“I enjoyed it.” Joshua answers, turning to look at you with a close-lipped smile on his face. He watches as your eyes practically sparkle back at him from the sight. “Really?” 
Joshua nods his head, and you raise your hands up to your warm face, feeling accomplished. He looks away from you as the two of you continue to walk, finding you to be rather endearing. Once the two of you make it to the bus stop, you turn around to face the ethereal man, giving him a bright smile that makes his heart stutter within his chest. 
“I’m happy you had fun, Joshua. I’ll make sure to text you this time!” You say happily as the bus pulls up, and you raise your hand up to wave at him. 
Joshua keeps his hands in his pockets once you turn around and head onto the bus. He watches as you walk towards the window seat, immediately pulling open the window once you sit down. You give him another smile and a wave, and he tilts his head at you. 
It’s only when the bus pulls away from the curb that Joshua raises his hand up and waves back at you. 
Joshua’s eyes glance over to the window again, and he decides that you were brighter than all of the stars in the sky tonight. 
He manages to fall asleep earlier this time, around 2 am. 
Your smile was the last thing on his mind before he did so. 
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Joshua sits at his desk, mindlessly doing his homework as the soft guitar instrumental plays in the background of his room. He taps the eraser against his bottom lip, before pressing the led onto the paper again.
The sound of his phone receiving a notification captures his attention, and he glances down at the cool metal, seeing an unfamiliar number. He slides up on his lockscreen and reads the message.
you: joshua ! it’s me yn >:D
The blonde lets out a breathless chuckle, lifting up his phone and sending a response back.
joshua: so you actually texted me this time
you: don’t make me feel bad ! D: i was busy after i met you that night 
i gave you my sikhye last week to make up for it !
The corner of Joshua’s lips quirks upwards at your use of emoticons, knowing that you most likely pouted as you typed the message.
joshua: it was very good
you: i know right
anyways, do you wanna hangout later today? i wanna go to the park to take pictures when the sun sets
joshua: so you’re using me as your professional photographer
you: of course :3
joshua: pft
you: see you at around 5 <3333
joshua: i’ll see you
The blonde sets down his phone, running a hand through his hair as he looks out his window. The blue skies stare back at him, and he watches as a few birds fly past. His eyes trail back over towards his laptop, and he sighs. 
“I’ll finish this assignment before I start to get ready.” 
It’s only a few hours later that Joshua’s walking towards the park, hands in his pockets as he listens to the sound of life around him. He looks around at his surroundings, about to enter the park entrance when he catches sight of a tteokbokki stand.
He watches as a couple hands the lady some money, before she prepares their bowls that will hold the yummy rice cake. He specifically eyes the mozzarella cheese she layers over it, and Joshua suddenly wonders when he became hungry.
“I wonder if yn would want some.” Joshua mutters to himself, tilting his head the longer he debates on whether or not to spend his money.
He fails to notice you standing not too far from him, smiling as you watch him practically waddle in place as he stares at the food stand. You walk up to the blonde, reaching out and resting your hands on both of his arms, peering over his shoulder.
“Are you hungry?” Joshua chokes on his saliva at your sudden appearance, causing you to double over in laughter and apologies as you try to help him breathe properly. He squints at you when he finally regains his composure, still clearing his throat as he pats his chest. 
“I’m literally so fucking sorry.” His eyes turn into slits at your apology, watching as your shoulders shake from the laughter you’re trying to hold back. Joshua gently pushes you with his hand, before turning around and walking into the park, tteokbokki now forgotten.
“Joshua! I’m sorry!” You laugh from behind, walking faster in order to catch up to him. Joshua doesn’t respond, but he doesn’t pick up his pace either, instead letting you hurry to his side. You smile at him, peeking your head in front of his face so that he can look at you. “Do you forgive me?”
“You thought me choking was funny.” 
“True.” You admit, and Joshua scoffs at your answer, rolling his eyes teasingly as he nudges you with his shoulder again. You grin happily, nudging him back as you pull out your phone from your pocket. 
“The sun is setting which means we probably only have 20 minutes to take the best sunset photos known to man. You’re my designated photographer today, remember?” Joshua begrudgingly takes the phone from your grasp, and you walk onto the relatively empty field of grass, raising your arms up towards the sky. The blonde just lets out a sigh loud enough for you to hear as he goes onto the camera app, 
“Ah, what a tragic life I live.” 
“You should be happy that you’re photographing such beauty!” You shout, and the corner of Joshua’s lip quirks up when he sees the furrow to your brow. He lifts up the phone so that you’re in frame, but peeks his head out from behind it.
“Do you want me to just take a billion photos?” He asks, and you give him a thumbs up. The blonde nods his head, going back into photographer mode as he starts to take photos of you. 
You’re quite surprised at how seriously Joshua’s taking this photography gig, with the way he’s angling the camera and the straight face he has on. You find yourself giggling at the sight, causing the blonde to pause when he sees your smile through the camera. 
Your eyes widen slightly when you see him stiffen, realizing your laughter might’ve accidentally thrown him off his game, “Was my giggling bad? Sorry!”
Joshua shakes his head immediately at your apology, lowering your phone from his face so that you can see him properly. It’s as if your heart stops when you do look at him.
His platinum hair is flowing a bit with the wind, similar to when you first met him that night on the bridge. His deerlike eyes are boring into yours, and you find a tinge of pink dusting across his cheeks as he runs a hand through his hair. 
Joshua hides his face behind your phone again, wanting to capture your reaction when he says, 
“Don’t apologize. Your smile is pretty.”
Your mouth drops open at the compliment, having not received one from the past couple weeks of knowing the man. Joshua captures the moment on your phone, a breath leaving his lips when he sees a smile make its way onto your face. 
“Thank you.” You mutter, radiance to your features as you start posing again underneath the sky painted with various shades of pink and purple. He nods his head as he continues to capture more photos of you, silently wondering how he finds you to be prettier than the beautiful sunset behind you.
“No problem.”
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You stare into those lovely brown eyes with a determined look on your face, making the blonde raise an eyebrow at you in confusion. He reaches his hand out towards you, and you stare at it, wondering what he’s going to do. 
“Ow!”
It only results in you rubbing your forehead with a glare, while Joshua just goes back to drinking his coffee—now happy about flicking your forehead. You slam your fists gently onto the wooden table, and the ethereal man just stares at you in silence.
“You know what we should do?” You ask, and Joshua stays quiet, knowing you’re going to answer the question anyways. A grin makes its way onto your face as you give him jazz hands, “Go to the store so that I can buy groceries because my fridge is low.” 
Joshua lets out a sigh, giving you an unimpressed look as he turns to face out the window. He’s not surprised, really. The last time the two of you hung out was just Joshua accompanying you to the library so that you wouldn’t have to return your books alone.
“Come on! I’ll buy you any snacks you want while we’re there. Besides, grocery shopping is fun.” Joshua continues to sip from his drink, somehow not surprised that you find restocking your food supply to be fun either.
“Well, more fun when you’re with someone at least.” You correct, and the blonde finally peeks at you, seeing the knowing smile on your face. He glances out the window, shrugging his shoulders in an attempt to appear indifferent. “As long as you buy me the snacks I want.”
“Of course, Joshua. What kind of person would I be if I didn’t buy you your favorite snacks?”
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“No, not those snacks. Those are expensive.” Joshua just stares at you in silence, bag of chips in hand as he watches you reach out towards the off-brand version. You pick up the bag, holding it out towards the pretty man and waving it for good measure. “These are cheaper and taste the same. Trust me, Joshua.”
“You told me that you’d buy the snacks I wanted if I went grocery shopping with you.” Joshua mutters with a pout to his lips, and you simply flash him an apologetic smile as you toss the bag into the cart while taking the original one from his grasp and returning it. The blonde scoffs, nudging you with his shoulder, and you giggle as you walk off towards the next aisle. “Yes, but we’re on a budget here.” 
Joshua pushes the cart after you, listening contently as you explain what you’re missing at your apartment and what food you should make for dinner. His eyes follow your movements as you gesture with your hands, now explaining a story of how you almost set your toy kitchen on fire when you were younger. 
Your eyes twinkle underneath the fluorescent light, and your lips are turned upwards in a warm smile as you look back on the memory. Your voice is soft but cheerful as you tell him about the memory while throwing in some items into the cart, and Joshua finds that there’s a lump in his throat as he watches you giggle.
You turn your head to look at the blonde, just to find his pretty eyes staring at you with an indecipherable emotion in them. Feeling warmth flood your face from his stare, you look down at the cart to place the box of tea in your hands. 
“What’s on your mind?” You ask, proceeding to walk out of the aisle to go to the bread section. Joshua stays quiet for a moment, staring at your fingers peeking out of your sweater paws as your arms swing back and forth.
When you don’t hear a response, you move to glance back at him, only to pause when he pushes the cart forward so that he’s now walking right beside you. Joshua raises his hand up and fondly pats your head, making your eyes widen at the sweet gesture. 
You slowly turn towards him, just to find the smallest hint of a smile on his face. Warmth floods your face at the lovely sight, and you can’t help but feel slightly disappointed when Joshua’s hand falls back onto the cart handle. 
The two of you gaze into each other's eyes in silence for a moment, and you begin to wonder when that hint of a sparkle began to show in Joshua’s eyes over the last month of the two of you hanging out. He turns away when he feels the tips of his ears turn red, looking over towards the bread aisle. You watch as he takes a step forward with the cart as he suddenly says,
“Let’s get this bread.” 
You let out a loud laugh at the old meme, startled at the fact that Joshua even said that as you follow after him. 
As Joshua watches you choose the bread you want while also picking out some cookies for the two of you to share on the way to your apartment, he finds himself feeling content for the first time in a long time. 
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“Hope you enjoy it.” Joshua says as he places the last dish onto the table, giving the customers a tight smile before walking back over to the register. He rests his head into his hands, grimacing at the oncoming migraine he knows will come later in the hour. 
He peeks through his fingers to look at the clock, seeing that he’s still on shift for another three hours. The blonde lets out a quiet groan, wondering if his boss has any aspirin he could possibly take.
The sound of the bells chiming from the door opening is what has him look up, trying to mask the pain from his headache as he stares towards the entrance. His eyes widen slightly when he sees you standing there, a bright smile on your face as you wave at the pretty man. 
“Yn?”
You quickly walk up towards Joshua, feeling happy that you were able to come visit him during his shift. You slam your hand on the counter that keeps the two of you separated, while raising ₩20,000 towards his face with your other. Joshua simply raises an eyebrow at you, wondering why you look so determined.
“I’ll have your favorite dish from here and for you to eat it with me during your break.” 
“Are you trying to buy me, yn? My favorite dish is only 7,000 won-” 
“Now don’t make me sound like a bad person! You should be grateful I’m buying us food—your favorite nonetheless.” You whine, and Joshua just chuckles at the pout to your lips. You squint when he doesn’t take the money from you, only for your mouth to drop open in protest when you see him pull out his card.
“Joshua!”
“I’ll pay for the meal. It’ll keep me safe since you wanted to buy me-”
“I did not!” You laugh, watching as the receipt comes out from the printer after he pays for the meal. He places his card back into his wallet, before motioning towards a booth near the wall. “Go sit down, I’ll let my boss know I’m going on my 30.” 
You nod your head, walking over to the booth and sitting down on the rather worn out cushions. While you wait for Joshua, you rest your head onto your arms over the table, closing your eyes. A sad smile forms on your face when you hear your heartbeat in your ears, a reminder that your time left here is dwindling. 
It’s been a month and a few days since you found out about your ill-fate on that cold, January night. 
However, you haven’t found yourself thinking about your inevitable doom as often as you thought you would. Instead, you’ve been spending your days hanging out with Joshua, and using your nights to plan out the next place the two of you should go to.
You don’t know when you decided to spend your last three months trying to help Joshua see the beauty in life.
But as you look up from the table and see his pretty eyes starting to sparkle at you when he places the food down onto the surface, the corners of his lips quirking upwards as he explains how his boss was teasing him,
You realize that you wouldn’t want to spend them any other way.
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The two of you walk down the street side by side, taking sips of the sikhye you bought for the both of you to make up for the meal. The comfortable silence is settled over you guys like a blanket, not needing any words to be able to spend time with each other contently.
You take a peek at the beautiful man, suddenly noticing that the dark eye bags that once adorned his features have diminished significantly. The roots of his platinum hair are beginning to grow, but it seems like he doesn’t really care. 
You wouldn’t care if you looked like Joshua, either.
He’s too pretty.
“Who?” 
God fucking damn it.
You immediately look away from Joshua’s curious gaze, warmth flooding your face at the fact that you just blatantly announced that he was too pretty when the two of you were walking in a relatively comfortable silence. 
“Cha Eunwoo from Astro.” You lie, and the blonde nods his head in agreement after a moment, turning back to face the front. Silence falls over the two of you again, and you’re incredibly grateful that he didn’t ask more questions.
But you also find yourself a bit disappointed at the lack of them.
When the two of you end up at the front of your apartment building, you both turn towards each other to say your goodbyes. However, as the streetlight lays over Joshua’s blonde hair, almost mimicking the appearance of a halo, you realize you don’t really want the night to end.
“Thank you for visiting me at work, yn. Make sure to text me when you get into your apartment.” Joshua tells you with his soft voice. You hum in response, shifting from one foot to another. “Thank you for the food. I’ll try to visit more.” 
Joshua nods his head, raising his hand up to send you a tentative wave. “I’ll see you later, yn.” 
You smile softly, waving back at him as he turns around and starts to walk away. An internal battle goes on inside you as you try to figure out what you want to do, watching as his figure gets smaller as the distance grows between you.
Squeezing your eyes shut, you shout out:
“Do you wanna come in and watch a movie with me?!”
Joshua pauses at the question, like, physically and mentally freezes. His eyes are wide as he stares at the pavement, and he wonders why his heart is beating so fast in his chest at the question. There’s a small breeze that passes the both of you, and you bite your bottom lip.
The silence is deafening.
Joshua slowly turns to glance at you, and you feel your heart sink slightly at the shocked expression on his face. You’ve come to realize as the two of you look at each other, that you asking him to come in was a mistake. So you open your mouth to tell him he doesn’t have to,
“Okay.” Your mouth remains open at his answer, believing that you must’ve just imagined him agreeing to your suggestion. 
And so you respond, “Heh?”
Joshua huffs, walking over so that the two of you are only a foot apart. He squints at you, and you furrow your eyebrows in response to the expression on his face.
“Yes. I’ll come in and watch a movie with you.” 
“Oh.” 
The two of you stare at each other for another moment. With you just gauging what he said while Joshua stands in silence, amusement and shyness written across his features. 
You suddenly let out a gasp, the fact that he said yes now sinking in as you step over towards the entrance and slide your card so that the doors will open. Joshua chuckles at the obvious embarrassment on your face when the doors finally open and you gesture towards the inside of the lobby.
“Let’s go up.” You say with a tight smile, and the blonde nods his head, following after you as the doors shut behind the both of you. 
The way to your apartment is rather quiet, except for the quiet chuckles Joshua lets out whenever he glances at you and you having to elbow him in the stomach. 
When you finally unlock your door and the two of you step inside, you suddenly realize all of your medication that you have to hide. You turn to face Joshua as he slips off his shoes and steps into the pair of slippers you have for guests, and his beautiful eyes land on you, signaling that you have his attention.
“You can go and sit on the couch, I just need to tidy up a bit.” The blonde nods his head, watching as you scurry off to your bedroom, shutting the door behind you. He lets out a breath, before walking over towards the couch, gaze travelling around your cozy apartment. 
His eyes latch onto a framed photo on the table next to the couch, and he carefully picks it up, feeling warmth flood his chest at the sight. 
You’re standing underneath a fully bloomed cherry blossom tree, a bright smile on your face as you look at the camera. Your arms are lifted up towards the sky in excitement, a habit of yours that Joshua has noticed in the month that he’s known you. 
He gently places the photo back down onto the table when he hears your bedroom door open, and he looks over to see you now dressed in a set of strawberry pajamas. The sight is so precious to behold that Joshua lets out a soft smile, and your eyes widen when you see it.
He smiled. This is the first time you’ve seen him smile.
“Are my pajamas funny to you?” You squeak out in an attempt to not make him uncomfortable by mentioning his smile. Holding back from slapping yourself at your strange tone, you just watch as Joshua nods his head, an emotion akin to warmth flooding his beautiful eyes as he stares at you. 
“I expected nothing less from you, yn.” Joshua responds softly, and you find no sign of teasing in his voice. You cough into your shoulder, breaking the eye contact as soon as you feel heat rush up to your face. Reaching out towards the remote, you turn on the TV and point towards the couch. 
“Go sit and choose a movie, I’ll go and get us some snacks.” You tell the blonde, and he plops down onto the worn out sofa as you walk into your kitchen. His eyes trail after you for a moment, before he turns back to the TV and starts scrolling through your Netflix.
You come back a few minutes later with snacks in hand, just to smile at the movie he chose. Joshua glances towards you, quietly thanking you for the snacks as you settle down beside him, making sure to place a bit of distance between the two of you. 
“Have you watched this?” Joshua asks as he takes a bite of popcorn, and you nod your head, turning to him with a grin. “A Silent Voice is one of my favorite movies.” 
Joshua’s mouth drops open into an ‘o’ shape, before suggesting if you want to choose another movie. You shake your head, instead grabbing the remote from the table and pressing play. 
“You chose it, so we’re going to watch it.” You mumble, leaning back into the couch and taking a sip of your water. The blonde’s eyes linger on you as the opening of the movie plays, wondering how one person could be so kind, so bright. 
You feel Joshua’s eyes on you. You know that he’s staring at you. 
But you know that your heart would just go feral and your face would turn warm if you look back. So you blindly reach out towards him with your hand, turning his head to face the TV instead. You retract your hand afterwards, a small smile on your face as you notice Joshua shaking his head in disbelief at your actions.
“Watch the movie.” You mutter, warmth flooding your cheeks as you try to appear indifferent. The blonde takes another bite of popcorn before turning back towards the TV, trying to suppress his chuckles.
The two of you watch the movie in silence, except to offer each other snacks or to shit on one of the characters you each dislike. 
It’s nice. Joshua thinks to himself at one point, turning to glance at you when you giggle at a specific scene. He looks back at the TV, biting back a small smile from forming on his face, This is nice.
When the movie hits the 45 minute mark, Joshua finds that you haven’t been taking any sips of your water or stealing some pieces of his popcorn. He’s about to comment on one of the characters when he feels a weight slump onto his shoulder. 
“Yn?” Joshua asks quietly, turning his head to look down at you. Your eyes are closed, mouth slightly open as you release puffs of air. He lets out a smile when he realizes you fell asleep, reaching out and patting your head softly. 
“Silly.” He mumbles, before taking a glance at the clock and sees that it’s already midnight. The blonde carefully grabs the remote that sits on the table and turns off the TV, before moving the snacks and drinks off the couch to the best of his ability as he tries not to wake you up.
Once he’s done with that, he carefully settles you down onto the cushions so that you’re laying comfortably. He takes the throw blanket from the back of the couch and lays it over your body. Letting out a breath once he’s finished, he grins at the angelic expression on your face as you sleep peacefully.
“I’ll see you later, yn.” Joshua says softly, before turning around to walk towards your door. 
Except for the hand that grasps onto his own, preventing him from taking another step. 
He slowly turns to glance down at you, seeing you with your eyes still closed, hand holding onto his. Joshua makes a move to carefully release the grip you have on him, but freezes when you say in a soft voice,
“Stay.” 
Joshua stares at you, unsure of what to do as you continue to hold his hand. 
“You don’t want me to stay, yn.” Joshua mutters, an indecipherable feeling flooding him when your grip on his hand tightens a bit. 
“Stay with me, Joshua.” 
And so he does. 
He scoots you over on the couch, wondering whether or not he’s gonna fall to his inevitable doom during the middle of the night as the two of you can hardly fit on the small surface. Carefully, he lays onto his back, staring up at your ceiling as silence fills the room, the fuzzy throw blanket covering you both. 
You turn over so that you’re facing him, and your hand falls onto his stomach. The blonde just listens to the sound of your steady breathing, wondering how you fell asleep so fast as he feels himself beginning to become drowsy. After a few minutes, his eyes softly fall shut, breathing now matching your own.
Joshua finds that sleep comes easier tonight.
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You’re seated on the bench, waiting for Joshua to arrive as you stare at the date on your phone.
february 17, 2021
Letting out a breath at the harsh reality check, you tap your shoe against the pavement, turning off your phone to look out towards the road.
You have a month and a half left. 
“When did time move so fast? Whenever I was in the hospital it moved so slow.” You mutter, a sad smile gracing your features as you look around at all the people walking past you. Turning your head, you suddenly lock eyes with those  deerlike eyes you’ve come to know. 
Your once sad smile turns into one of pure joy as you stand up from the bench, waving your hands excitedly as Joshua walks over to you. The blonde reaches out and pats your head in greeting once he’s a foot away, and you chuckle in response, ignoring the fact that your heart rate is a bit faster now.
“How were classes?” You ask as the two of you begin walking towards the cat café. Joshua mentioned in passing a week ago that he wanted to go to a cat café, so you set up a reservation for the two of you. 
The blonde purses his lips, realizing that he’s been enjoying attending classes a bit more as of recently. You gaze at him expectantly, grinning when Joshua simply just nods his head and looks back at you. “It was alright. I was excited thinking about the cat café though, so I’ll probably have to add some stuff to my notes later.” 
“I expected you to be more of a dog person, if I’m being honest.” You state, and Joshua looks back towards the front, letting out a small grin. 
“I am.” 
“Then what are we doing going to a cat café that I made reservations for a week prior?” 
The blonde shrugs his shoulders, turning to you with mirth filling his pretty eyes. He motions towards your phone, and you raise an eyebrow, raising it up so that the two of you can see it as it unlocks. Your mouth drops open when you see your homescreen, the photo of you and your old friend’s cat that was taken a couple years back, and all the pieces suddenly come together. 
“Joshua! Did you only say you wanted to go to a cat café because you knew I liked cats? That ruins the whole purpose of this-” 
Joshua cuts you off by simply holding open the door to the cat café, and you blink in a state of stunned silence, having not realized that the two of you have already arrived. He chuckles, “I’m a dog person, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like cats. I’ve always wanted to go to one, so hurry up and go in.”
Pursing your lips, you walk into the café, but not without poking the middle of Joshua’s stomach as you do so, letting out a satisfied grin at the sound of his quiet squeak. Your mouth immediately drops open when a black and white cat snuggles up to your legs, and you kneel down, petting the soft fur as you let out inaudible excited sounds. 
Joshua lets the door close behind him, the sound of the bells attached to the door letting out a little ring throughout the cafÊ. He glances down, seeing you happily petting the cats before the two of you have even ordered. 
“Yn, I’ll go order for us.” Joshua tells you, and you simply nod your head without a verbal response, still softly squealing as more cats walk up to you. The blonde lets out a breath, shaking his head with the hint of a smile on his face as he heads over to the register to place your guys’ order.
You regretfully stand up from the floor, hoping the cats will follow you as you walk over to the table you reserved. You sit down in the booth, watching as Joshua converses with the employee as he orders the food and drinks. 
Resting your chin on the palm of your hand, you smile fondly when Joshua glances around to find you. Your heart warms when his eyes finally land on you, a grin forming on his face as he walks over to you. 
“There was a cat laying on the table behind the employee at the register. He was so cute, I hope he comes over to our table.” Joshua tells you as soon as he sits down into the seat across from you, placing the receipt onto the wooden surface. You open your mouth to respond, only to let out a quiet squeal when a cat jumps onto the empty space beside you. 
“Hi pretty!” You greet, sparkles in your eyes as the cat nuzzles against your hand, asking for more pets. Joshua smiles at the sight, unlocking his phone and taking a photo of you happily petting the tabby cat. The sound of the camera shutter catches your attention, and you turn to glance at the source, seeing Joshua smiling fondly down at his phone screen. 
“Did you take a photo of me playing with the beautiful cat?” You ask with a teasing grin on your face, not expecting an answer from the pretty man. You stroke the cat’s head fondly, only for your hand to stutter when Joshua says, 
“You looked cute.” 
A brief moment of silence passes between you, with Joshua staring at his phone, and you listening to your heart beat against your ears as warmth floods your face. Your brain tries to formulate a response, but it can only form inaudible screeching noises. So instead, you turn your head to glance at the blonde, only for your eyes to widen when you see a fluffy grey cat trying to get his attention.
“Joshua!” 
“What?” He asks, looking up at you when he hears the urgency in your tone. You point towards the cat sitting patiently beside his chair, and Joshua furrows his eyebrows in confusion, turning to where you pointed, only for his eyes to widen when he locks eyes with the cat.
“You followed me from the register!” Joshua exclaims in a soft voice, reaching down to pick up the cat. You let out a bright smile as Joshua coos at the precious animal, petting the cat softly as his eyes sparkle with joy.
“Yn, this is the cat I wanted to show you.” He tells you, letting out a soft chuckle when the cat nuzzles his head into Joshua’s chest. You nod your head, about to respond when the waitress walks up to your guys’ table and begins to place your order down onto the surface. 
“Thank you so much!” You say, and the waitress gives you a smile, bowing her head in response. She makes a move to leave, only to stop when she sees you and Joshua continue to play with the cats that stayed near you both. 
“Would you like me to take a photo of the two of you?” You and Joshua pause, both turning to glance at the waitress as she stands by your table, a knowing smile on her face. 
You and Joshua don’t have a single photo together in the month and a half that you’ve known each other. You’re not sure how he feels about his photo being taken, as he’s usually the one behind the camera rather than in front of it when the two of you are together.
Taking a peek at Joshua to see his reaction, you notice the indecipherable look on his face, and that’s how you know his answer. You give the waitress a small smile, moving to open your mouth when you see Joshua’s hand outstretched towards her through your peripheral vision. 
You turn your head to look at him, only to see that he’s giving her a grin, phone in hand as he nods his head. “That’d be nice, thank you.” 
Joshua lifts up the cat in his lap and stands up from his chair, taking a step forward and sitting down in the booth beside you. You continue to stare at him in silence, the slight shock evident on your features when he finally turns to glance at you. He gives you a soft smile, before pointing towards the waitress preparing to take your guys’ photo. 
“Say cheese!” She says, but you continue to stare at Joshua, watching as he smiles at the camera, raising the cat’s paw as if he’s saying hello. Warmth floods your heart as you turn towards the camera, a bright smile on your face as you hold up your cat’s paw as well, matching Joshua’s pose.
As you lay in bed hours later, you turn your head towards your bedside table when you hear the vibration of your phone. Reaching out, you pick up the cool metal, seeing a few messages from Joshua.
joshushushu: [attachment 4 images] 
thank you for taking me to the cat cafĂŠ :3
i think you’re some sort of cat whisperer based on how many cats came up to our table lol
it’s late, so you’re probably asleep
i’ll text you in the morning ^^
sweet dreams, yn
You tap on the images Joshua sent, and you let out a smile when you see the first photo is of you smiling happily down at the tabby cat, softly petting her head. Downloading the image, your thumb swipes across the screen, and you feel warmth flood your face at the fact that it’s the photo of the two of you. Except you’re not staring at the camera.
You’re staring at Joshua.
There’s a fond smile on your face, eyes sparkling brightly at him as he smiles at the camera, seemingly having no idea of the fact that you’re staring at him rather than the camera. Biting the inside of your cheek, you download the image and swipe to the left, now seeing the photo of both you and Joshua smiling at the camera, a cat paw in hand as you each make them wave for the photo. 
You download the photo before swiping to the left one more time, and your breath hitches when you lay eyes on the image.
You’re laughing happily down at the tabby cat who was protesting the grabbing of the paws for the photo, not paying attention to posing anymore. While Joshua is now staring at you, the softest of smiles on his face as he watches you laugh with the cat. 
You let out a shaky breath, zooming into the photo and seeing that he really is looking at you. 
He’s looking at you as if you’re the most precious thing in the world.
You download the image, a small smile on your face as you go to your settings and replace the homescreen you’ve had for the last two years, exiting the app to now see the photo of you and Joshua as your wallpaper. The warmth from the photo covers you like a blanket, and you turn off your phone, placing it back down onto your bedside table. 
You roll over onto your side and close your eyes, ignoring the harsh reality check that’s looming in the back of your mind in order to try and retain that happy feeling.
You fall asleep with lingering thoughts of pretty cats and Joshua Hong’s smile.
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“Thank you, have a good rest of your day.” Joshua says warmly as he hands the to-go bag to the customer. She gives him a smile, reaching into her pocket to take out ₩15,000 and place it onto the table. The blonde’s eyes widen slightly, and he looks back up at her in a stunned silence, as if to ask if she really means it. 
The woman nods her head, “You deserve it. Thank you for the food.” 
Joshua watches as she leaves the restaurant, still shocked as he watches her figure disappear out the door. He glances back down at the ₩15,000, reaching out and picking it up from the counter, eyeing the money for a moment. 
“I’ve been working here for six months.” Joshua mutters quietly, taking the ₩15,000 and placing it into his apron. He lets out a grateful smile, grabbing the spray bottle and towel to go and clean some tables. 
It was the first tip he’s ever received.
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“See you on Friday!” Joshua calls out as he pushes back the curtain to exit the kitchen, only to stop and turn back when he hears his boss call out to him. The older man walks over to Joshua, grinning and resting a hand on the blonde’s shoulder. 
“I just wanted to tell you that you look great lately.” Joshua raises an eyebrow, wondering what could’ve changed. He does a onceover of his own appearance, and his boss lets out a laugh, shaking his head. 
“I mean you in general. You look happier, brighter even. I’m happy for you.” Joshua blinks in surprise, before letting out a small smile. He bows his head as his thanks, and his boss pats his shoulder once more and turns around to walk back towards his office. 
Joshua lets out a breath, before closing the curtain behind him and walking over towards the exit. He tilts his head, “How does a person look happy?” 
He pushes open the doors and moves to step out from under the cover, only to pause when he registers the rain falling onto the road. He sighs, glancing down at his empty hands, cursing himself for not bringing an umbrella. 
“Guess I have to sprint-”
“Joshua!” The blonde’s eyebrows furrow at the voice, and he looks up, seeing you hurrying over with a bright yellow umbrella. It’s a stark contrast to the rather gloomy atmosphere and all the black umbrellas around you. His heart rate picks up at the sight of your smile, watching as you make your way over until you’re standing a couple feet away from him.
“How’d you know I forgot my umbrella?” Joshua asks teasingly as you hand him the yellow umbrella, taking it from your grasp and holding it over the two of you as you begin to walk down the sidewalk. 
“Had an intuition.” You answer with a grin, and he rolls his eyes. The two of you update each other on how your days were, chuckles exchanged as you explain how you made the best kimchi fried rice of your life. 
“You should make it for me sometime.” Joshua says, and you peek at him, smiling and nodding your head. 
“Of course, Joshua.” 
The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, walking close beside each other in order to fit under your small umbrella. It’s when you’re close to Joshua’s apartment, and the streets are relatively quiet, that Joshua glances over and notices your hand sticking out of the umbrella. He watches in silence as you let the rain hit your skin, moving your hand as if it were a wave in the ocean.
“Your hand is getting wet.” Joshua points out, and you pause, turning to him as warmth rushes to your face at the fact that he caught you. You give him a bashful smile, nodding your head as you let your arm fall back to your side. “Yeah.” 
“Why?” You notice that he looks genuine, there’s no teasing tone in his voice, no mirth in his gaze as he stares at you. He just wants to know why you were letting your own arm get wet. You break the eye contact, looking down at the ground as the two of you continue to walk. 
“I just realized I’ve never played in the rain before.” 
Joshua stares at you for a moment longer, having not seen you so shy about something you wanted to do before. He lets out a breath, turning away as he reaches up and closes the yellow umbrella, promptly removing the shield that had been protecting the two of you from the rain.
Your eyes widen as you feel the rain hit you, and you turn your head, seeing Joshua place your umbrella down on the sidewalk. He looks back towards you, raising an eyebrow when he sees the shocked expression on your face. 
Joshua simply just closes his eyes and tilts his head up towards the sky, outstretching his arms as he feels the rain soak his clothes. That’s all you need to see for a smile to finally form on your face, and you let out a laugh, raising your arms into the air and spinning around. 
Joshua opens his eyes when he hears your laugh, and he looks over at you—only to feel his breath get taken away. The rain falls softly from the sky, landing on you as you laugh happily, a bright smile on your face. Time seems to slow down as he stares at you, heart stuttering in his chest as he watches you spin around, pure joy radiating from your features. 
He’s reminded of the first time the two of you met on the Banpo bridge almost two months ago, when you told him that life was beautiful and he didn’t understand how you could see it that way.
“I wish I could see it like you do.” Joshua mutters, and you look over at him, finding that he’s still staring up at the sky. His breath is visible due to the cold temperatures, and you watch as he lets out a sigh. He turns towards you, giving you a heartbreaking smile, “Life hasn’t been kind to me.” 
As Joshua watches you dance in the rain, he realizes that he finally understands what you mean. 
Life is beautiful.
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You lay in bed, still shivering even after having taken a hot shower as soon as you finished dancing in the rain with Joshua a couple hours prior. With a shaking hand, you pull up the comforter closer to your chin, wondering when you’ve become so frail, weak you should say.
“At least Joshua hasn’t noticed anything.” You mumble, knowing that your time left is short as you’ve been feeling more tired as the days go by. Rolling over, you look out the window to try and get sleepy, seeing the moon staring back at you. 
Your hand slips out of the covers, reaching out and grasping the air as you tried to reach for the moon. Letting your arm fall back onto the bed, you let out a breath.
You always wondered if you’d ever be able to reach the moon and the stars when you were younger. 
“Yn?” Turning your head, you see Joshua standing by the door to his bedroom. His blonde hair falls softly over his forehead, almost hiding his pretty eyes from sight. You watch as he walks over, reaching out and resting his hand over your head when he notices you shivering. 
“Do you want another blanket? You’re shivering.” Giving him a soft smile, you shake your head as you simply pull the comforter up more. 
“Why are you still awake?” You ask, and he stares at you for a moment. 
The corner of his lips quirk upwards, “I should be asking you the same thing.” 
“Touché.”
Joshua chuckles, patting your head fondly before pointing back towards the bedroom door. You peek through the doorway, seeing his dark living room. “I’ll go back to the couch. I just wanted to check on you.” 
It’s when he’s about to leave that you reach out and grasp his wrist softly, promptly stopping him from taking another step. He turns to look back at you, seeing the same shy look on your face that he saw earlier. 
He’s reminded of the night where the two of you slept on the couch a few weeks prior, having experienced this exact scenario before. 
“Mm?” You bite the inside of your cheek, not wanting to respond. Instead, you weakly pull him towards you, and he takes a few steps towards your bedside. 
The two of you stare at each other for a moment in silence, numerous questions flooding your guys’ brain as you do so. However, you can only bring yourself to mutter out one word.
“Stay.” 
Joshua’s stare doesn’t waver, and you feel yourself growing more embarrassed the longer you wait for his response. You fully believe that he’s going to say no with the way he doesn’t hold your hand in return, and your belief comes true when he lets your hand fall back to the bed. 
It shouldn’t hurt. You know that you shouldn’t have gotten attached to him, or let him become so close to you. 
You’re going to die anyways.
Joshua turning down your request is for the best. It means there are still barriers between the two of you, that the last time you woke up with his arms wrapped around you was just a moment of weakness. That it won’t happen again.
The regret pools in your heart as you watch him turn and walk away, and you wonder whether or not you should apologize for even asking him in the first place.
Only for your eyes to widen when you see him walk to the other side of the bed, pulling up the comforter and climbing in. He arranges his pillows, before laying down and turning over onto his side, now facing you. 
You stare at him in shock, and he squints at you in amusement. The blonde reaches out and pokes your forehead, snapping you out of your surprised state. He chuckles, “You asked me to stay, so I’m staying.” 
A smile finally makes its way onto your face, and Joshua lets out a breath at the sight. The moonlight rests over you, illuminating your features beautifully, even in his dark bedroom. He feels himself smile back at you, eyes softening with fondness as he stares at you.
You tentatively reach your hand out, trying your best to hide the shakiness to it as you let it rest on Joshua’s cheek. He doesn’t seem unphased from the touch, he just continues to stare into your eyes as the look on your face softens.
“You look best when you’re happy.” You say quietly, and the blonde doesn’t respond. You watch as tears slowly fill his eyes, and your eyebrows furrow. You’ve never seen Joshua cry, not once in the time you’ve known him. Unexpectedly, Joshua’s hand comes out from under the covers and rests over yours, encompassing your cold hand in warmth. 
“I want to be a better person for you.” Joshua mutters, blinking away the tears as he tries to look at anything else in his room. You shake your head, your own heart breaking within your chest at how vulnerable he looks. You swipe away the tears from under his eye, and his eyes flit back to you, watching as a soft smile forms on your face. 
“You… you have always been more than enough, Joshua.” 
The blonde lets out a breath at your response, before his eyes softly fall shut. Your heart is warm within your chest as you let your eyes linger on him for a moment longer, his hand still resting over your own as he tries to fall asleep. 
Your gaze trails over back towards the window, seeing how bright the moon and millions of stars are in the dark sky. 
You may not have reached the moon and the stars like you originally wanted.
You look back towards Joshua, content washing over you when you listen to his steady breathing, seeing that he’s already fast asleep. You remove yours and Joshua’s hand from his cheek, letting it rest onto the mattress. A smile escapes you when you feel his hand tighten softly around yours in his sleep. After a moment, your eyes slowly fall shut with Joshua being the one to keep you warm, hand holding your own as the two of you fall asleep facing each other.
But you’ve reached the sun, and that’s more than enough.
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You stare at your medicine, wondering if you should even take it when you don’t have much time left. Shaking your head, you let out an aggravated sigh, taking out the pill and dry-swallowing it. 
You immediately regret dry-swallowing the large pill as you grab your glass of water, taking a large gulp to try and swallow it properly. Letting out a cough, you walk over to your fridge, not even feeling hungry as you stare at the food in it. 
march 18, 2021
It’s been two months. 
Your time is running out.
You’re about to grab a small container of yogurt when you hear your phone go off, and you glance over to see the screen lit up. Closing your fridge door, you walk back over to the counter and pick up your phone, a grin immediately forming on your face when you see that Joshua texted you.
joshushushu: be ready at 8 later, i’ll come pick you up !
you: so you’re the one planning now, huh? 
since when were you coming for my career
joshushushu: you’re just jealous cause i’m better at it
you: take that BACK.
joshushushu: see you at 8 <3
you: JOSHUA
You chuckle, turning off your phone and looking back towards your refrigerator. Letting out a sigh, you walk over and take out the yogurt, grabbing a spoon and dipping into the snack. You quietly eat the yogurt as you walk over to your living room window, staring out at the city. 
The skies are blue, a contrast to the cloudy days Seoul had for the last couple of weeks. Your eyes follow the birds that fly past your window, watching as they get smaller and smaller the farther they go. You let out a sigh, taking another spoonful of yogurt.
“What a beautiful day.” 
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“Are you okay?” You turn your head to glance at Joshua, seeing the look of concern on his face as he looks at you. Giving him a smile, you nod your head, reaching up and rubbing the back of your neck as you look out the window of the bus.
“I’m okay, just tired.” The feeling of Joshua’s eyes on your side profile remains, and you hope that he doesn’t question it anymore. The blonde simply smiles, patting the top of your head fondly. “You can sleep, yn. I’ll wake you up when we get there.” 
You bite the inside of your cheek at his kindness, and nod in response. You rest your head against the window and close your eyes, ignoring the rumbling from the bumpy road. 
A few minutes pass of Joshua scrolling through his phone when he sees your head moving out of the corner of his eye. He looks at you, seeing your head bumping against the window whenever the bus drives over a pothole in the road, somehow still fast asleep.
Joshua reaches out and softly grasps your head, pulling you over so that you’re now resting on his shoulder. He stares at your sleeping face for a moment longer, finding that you look at peace as you sleep. 
“Pretty.” Joshua mutters, before looking out towards the window for the rest of the way.
It’s only half an hour later when you feel a hand gently shaking your shoulder, and Joshua’s soft voice telling you to wake up. Groggily, you open your eyes and sit up in the seat, scratching your head. You turn and look up to find Joshua standing up from the bus seat, throwing his bag over his shoulder. He lets out a giggle at how sleepy you look, “Come on. We’re here.” 
Turning towards the window, you see the Han River glimmering back at you. Raising an eyebrow, you stand up from the seat and look at Joshua, who’s just giving you a close-lipped smile. He extends his hand out towards you, and you stare at it.
After a moment, you reach out, feeling his warm hand encompass your cold one. He grins, giving your hand a squeeze before turning and guiding you off the bus. The two of you walk in silence as he leads you towards the top of a hill, but it soon becomes hard to breathe. 
“J-Joshua.” You wheeze out, and the blonde pauses, turning to see you doubled over. 
“Are you okay? Do you want to take a break here?” You don’t respond, instead trying to catch your breath as you hold onto Joshua’s hand like a lifeline. His eyebrows furrow, and he squats so that he can look into your eyes, watching as you begin to breathe properly again.
“Yn.” 
“Mm?” 
“We gotta work on your endurance.” Joshua jokes, and you let out a laugh, reaching out and slapping his shoulder as you stand up straight. He giggles, feeling relieved that you’ve caught your breath. He gives your hand a squeeze when he gets up from his squatting position, and you look at him. “Ready?” 
You nod your head, squeezing his hand in return, “Ready.” 
Joshua smiles, leading you towards the top of the hill once again. He makes sure to keep glancing back at you and even slows his pace as a means for you to not get exhausted again. 
When the two of you finally reach the top of the hill, he lets go of your hand, and you pout at the loss of warmth. You’re about to ask why he brought you here, only to stop when you see him unzip his bag, pulling out a picnic blanket and laying it onto the cold grass. 
“A picnic? At 9 pm?” You ask, only for Joshua not to respond as he just slips off his shoes and lays down onto the checkered blanket. You smile in amusement, tilting your head as you wonder what he’s doing. 
Joshua lets out an exasperated sigh, reaching out and patting the empty space beside him on the blanket. Pursing your lips, you slowly slip off your sneakers and climb onto the blanket, carefully laying on your back. Your head is turned to him, and you’re about to ask what now? Only for Joshua to gently grasp your chin, turning you away until you look up towards the sky and-
Wow. 
The millions of stars are shining brighter than you’ve ever seen. It was as if someone gathered a handful of sparkles and scattered them across the wide expanse of the dark sky, bringing light to unappreciative eyes. 
Joshua turns his head to see your reaction, and he smiles at the bright look to your eyes, your mouth being dropped open slightly in awe. 
He knew of your fascination with the sky ever since the two of you met on Banpo bridge. From the way your eyes sparkled at the sight of the moonlight reflecting across the river, to the content smile that would make its way onto your face whenever you’d look up towards the moon.
And so, whenever he would finish his evening classes at university, he’d take the bus to different parks and look for the spot that had the best sight of the sky at night.
Joshua wanted you to be able to reach the stars. 
“Do you like it?” You turn towards the pretty blonde, seeing the slight apprehension on his face in fear that you won’t be happy with his surprise for you. You watch as it melts away from the sight of your bright smile, and a breath of relief escapes him. 
“I love it.” 
The two of you turn back towards the sky, pointing at different constellations and talking about which star shines the brightest among the millions you can see. You let out a laugh when Joshua mistakenly points out lights from a plane as a shooting star, and he rolls his eyes, but the fond smile on his face tells you that he’s anything but annoyed. 
The two of you fall into a comfortable silence afterwards, just appreciating the beautiful sky. You feel warm, even though you’re in this cold weather, you somehow feel warm just by being with Joshua. The bright stars shine down at you, and you slowly raise your arm up to the sky.
Joshua’s eyes follow your hand, watching as it grasps at the air. His gaze trails down to your face, seeing you stare up at the stars with an indecipherable emotion in your eyes. He turns away, and your arm falls back down to your side. 
“What’s something you want to do with me?” Joshua asks, breaking the comfortable silence. You purse your lips, finding the question hard as you wonder how you could even answer this. 
You want to do everything with him.
You want to go to a karaoke place with him, go bowling, go to an amusement park and eat all the festival food. Watch a movie, play in the snow and build a snowman. Go to the beach and make sand castles, go grocery shopping, visit him at work. Go to uni with him, go on a walk, talk about your day, make him kimchi fried rice. Everything. 
You want to do everything with Joshua. 
Letting out a shaky breath, your eyes trail over to the trees down the hill, lined up on the sides of the pathway. You stare at the unbloomed buds, already seeing the beautiful flowers in the back of your mind that you know you won’t be here in time to see.
“Cherry blossoms.” You utter, and the blonde turns to you.
“Hm?”
“I want to see the cherry blossoms with you.” Joshua lets out an, ah, a smile forming on his face at the thought of seeing the beautiful pink flowers with you. He looks back up towards the stars, “Cherry blossoms were always my favorite flower.” 
You listen to Joshua’s soft voice, holding onto every word as you stare down at the unbloomed trees. The blonde lets out a breathless chuckle. “April was my favorite month because that’s when the cherry blossoms would bloom, but I stopped being excited for them a couple years back.” 
Joshua grins, heart growing warm in his chest when he thinks of you spinning around excitedly underneath the cherry blossom trees, the pink petals softly falling around you. 
“But I’m excited to see them with you, yn.” 
Your heart wavers in your chest at Joshua’s sweet words, and you clench your fist at your side. Tears fill your eyes as you look away from the unbloomed cherry blossom trees, gaze trailing back up towards the stars. A tear escapes your left eye as you choke out, 
“I’m excited to see them with you too, Joshua.” 
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Laying in bed, you stare up at the ceiling tiredly, having lost almost all your energy a week ago. You roll over and look at your phone, watching as the screen lights up.
march 23, 2021
You let out a shaky breath, knowing that you should admit yourself to the hospital within a few days. However,
You open up your messaging app, tapping on your conversation with Joshua.
you: joshuaaa 
be ready at 2 ! i prepared a fun day for us :)
joshushushu: does it involve you paying for our meal? 
you: capitalism is the root of all evil.
but yes. yes it does.
joshushushu: okay epic, i’m in.
i’ll see you later ^^
you: see you <3
Turning off your phone, you take in a deep breath, before slowly climbing out of bed. The exhaustion weighs over you like a blanket, but you push yourself to make it to the bathroom to shower.
You need to get ready to spend one last day with Joshua.
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Sitting on the bench at the bus stop, you stare down at your sneakers as you wait for the pretty blonde to show up. It took you a while to get to the bus stop, as you felt even more exhausted by the time you stepped out of your apartment complex. You took your medicine and attempted to eat some food, but to no avail. 
The sunlight that was once shining down onto you suddenly disappears as you were thinking to yourself, and you look up to see Joshua grinning down at you. 
“What did you plan for today? Grocery shopping?” He asks, and you roll your eyes, standing up when you notice the bus heading your way. Nudging his shoulder, you answer, “No, something better than restocking my food and cleaning supplies.” 
Joshua lets out a mock gasp, making you giggle as the two of you climb onto the bus. You sit down in the window seat, the pretty man following soon after and continuing what he was saying. 
“Better than following you around the grocery store while pushing a cart for an hour? No such thing.” You laugh, slapping his leg and shaking your head at him. He grins, reaching up and patting the top of your head fondly. 
“I’m kidding. Doing anything with you brightens my day either way.” Joshua confesses, and you freeze slightly, before regaining your composure. Giving him a tight smile, you turn and glance out the window, watching as the world passes by. Cars filled with people going to wherever it is they’re going, people waiting on the crosswalks to cross the street, children screaming and playing on the playgrounds.
The world is roaring with life. 
“I’m happy for them.” You whisper, before closing your eyes. 
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“Yn, you shouldn’t have.” Joshua says when you lead him towards the entrance of a dog café. You grin, shrugging your shoulders as you muster enough strength to pull open the door. “You’re a dog person. I am simply returning the favor.” 
The blonde chuckles, stepping into the café with you following after him. You reach up and hold your bicep, lightly rubbing the area as it feels a bit strained. Your arm immediately falls back to your side when Joshua stops and turns to glance at you, wondering why you’re behind him. 
He lets out a fond smile, reaching his hand out towards you. “Come on, let’s go see the dogs.” 
Your eyes slowly trail down to his hand, warm and inviting. A stark contrast to what yours have become, cold and lonely. You look back up at Joshua’s face, seeing him tilt his head at you, waiting for you to grasp his hand. 
He watches as an indecipherable emotion passes your eyes, before you let out a smile and walk up to him, intertwining your fingers with his. He grins, and the two of you walk further into the cafÊ, only to be greeted by a golden retriever. 
Your eyes widen in surprise at the beautiful dog, and you’re about to bend down to pet it—only to stop once the sound of Joshua’s happy laugh rings in your ears. You turn to look at him, finding him patting the dog’s head with a bright smile on his face. 
“Come on puppy, yn and I have to go order our food.” Joshua says softly, before leading you towards the register. You let out a happy squeal when you see all the other dogs roaming around the tables, feeling excited to play with all of them. 
You and Joshua tell the employee what you’d both like to order as a few dogs come to stand beside the two of you. When you’re told the price, you reach into your bag with your free hand to pull out your wallet, only for your mouth to drop open when you see Joshua already handing the employee his card. 
“Joshua! I wanted to pay for us.” You whine, and he simply squeezes your hand with an accomplished grin on his face. He thanks the employee once he’s handed back his card along with the receipt, before turning to face you. 
“You’re just too slow~” Joshua teases, and you squint. You open your mouth to start complaining more, only to pause when you hear the employee’s voice ring out. 
“Sorry to interrupt, but if you’d like, we have a photobooth that you both could go take pictures in.” They tell you with a shy smile, pointing towards the back of the café where the photobooth is, and your eyes brighten at the idea. 
“Thank you so much!” You say, before pulling Joshua in the direction of the photobooth, your free hand already holding your wallet so that you can pay for it. 
“Yn-” You immediately shove your card into the reader when the two of you step into the small box, closing the black curtain. The blonde chuckles at your determination, and you smile as you pull out your card once the payment is accepted.
“How should we pose?” Joshua asks, and you shrug as you watch the timer start to count down. 
“You just gotta feel it.” 
“That’s not helpful at all.” 
“Just follow my lead.” You say with a laugh, and he grins in amusement, turning back towards the screen. The two of you lean your heads closer to each other, and you wink while Joshua simply smiles as the first photo is captured. 
This continues for the next three photos, with the two of you laughing and doing different poses for the photostrip. You both climb out of the small box, waiting for the two photostrips to be printed as you talk about how silly you each must look.
“Ah, they’re printed.” You say once the two photostrips fall out, and you grab them both. You hand one to Joshua, and you hear him let out a small giggle. 
You stare at the photostrip quietly, gauging the photos. Warmth floods your chest at the third panel in particular, and you let out a breath.
This was when the two of you missed the countdown as you were both facing each other and laughing. Joshua’s eyes are bright and filled with warmth, a smile on his face as he looks at you in the photo. Then there’s you, mid-laugh, nothing but joy over your features.
“Wow.” You breathe out, and Joshua chuckles at your reaction, nudging you with his shoulder. You blink, looking away from the photostrip and redirecting your attention towards the blonde. “Mm?”
He points towards the table in the corner, where quite a few dogs are resting around. “Let’s go sit there.” 
You bite back a laugh, knowing exactly why he wants to sit at that exact spot. Nodding your head, you grin when you see his features brighten, and the two of you walk towards the table. The dogs perk up at your guys’ arrival, almost all of them going around Joshua as the two of you sit across from each other.
“So cute!” Joshua exclaims, a big smile on his face when the golden retriever from earlier rests its paws on Joshua’s chair, licking his face excitedly. The corners of your lips quirk up, and you take out your phone, opening the camera app. 
You watch as Joshua grins, petting the golden retriever to try and calm them down as they continue to attempt to lick his face. Tilting your head, you take the photo right as Joshua breaks out into laughter. 
You lower the phone from your face when Joshua turns towards you from the sound of the camera shutter, and he lets out a grin when his gaze trails over to your left hand side.
“So busy ogling me that you didn’t even notice the cute puppy waiting for your attention.” Your eyebrows furrow at Joshua’s sentence, and you turn your head to the left, expecting nothing, only for your eyes to widen when you see the precious corgi sitting beside you in the booth, tail wagging as they stare at you. 
“Oh my God. Hi baby!” You coo, reaching out and finally giving the attention the corgi had been wanting from you. The corgi licks your wrist, and you giggle, petting their back as you turn to shoot a glare towards the blonde. He raises an eyebrow at the squint to your eyes, and he tilts his head in question.
“I was not ogling you!” You exclaim, and Joshua lets out an angelic laugh that makes your heart do a somersault within your chest. A sheepish smile forms on your face, destroying the “angry” persona you were trying to put on.
“Yeah, yeah. Tell it to the judge.”
“Joshua!” You laugh, and he laughs along with you. 
Your guys’ laughter rings throughout the café for the rest of the afternoon, pure happiness exuding from the two of you.
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“Oh sikhye, how you never fail me.” You say lovingly to the drink in your hand. Joshua simply chuckles at your antics, taking a sip of his own sikhye as the two of you walk on the sidewalk towards the bridge. 
“Thank you for taking me to the dog café, I had a lot of fun.” Joshua tells you, and you nod your head, a smile forming on your face when you remember how many dogs had been around your table. 
“You’re like a dog magnet, while I’m a cat magnet.” You point out, and the blonde purses his lips in thought, before nodding his head in agreement. “That makes sense.” 
The two of you fall into a comfortable silence as you make your way onto the bridge, the sounds of the cars driving past you both filling the quiet.
“I feel like you could be a catboy, though.” Joshua accidentally snorts his sikhye at your abrupt comment, and you burst out into laughter as he doubles over, coughing up the drink. Patting his back, you wait for him to calm down as he slowly stands back up to his full height, taking deep breaths. 
“A catboy?”
“I cannot believe me calling you a catboy made you snort your drink.” You say, the corners of your mouth twitching as you try to hold back from smiling. The blonde catches this though, and he reaches out and pinches your cheek. 
“Hey!” 
Joshua smiles at your reaction, feeling satisfied that he got his payback after you made him snort his rice drink. He’s about to ask why you think he’s a catboy when he notices you walking up to the railing of the bridge.
You rest your hand onto the cold railing, staring out at the sight laid before you. The skies are painted in various shades of pink, blue, and purple. The sun is setting in the distance, the dark orange reflecting off the Han River, making the water glimmer. 
“It’s…”
“Beautiful.” Joshua finishes, and you turn to him, seeing the sparkle to his eyes as he stares at the scenery. You’re reminded of the cold January night where you met him over two months ago. 
His eye bags are practically gone and the hunch to his shoulders are now replaced with confidence. His features are glowing, looking healthy in comparison to before, but it’s his eyes that have changed the most. His eyes no longer appear exhausted as he turns to look at you, now replaced with something along the lines of content.
“We met on this bridge over two months ago.” You state, and Joshua doesn’t respond. He looks back out towards the water, resting his forearms onto the railing as the thought of that night comes to mind. You follow suit, taking a sip of your sikhye as the two of you stare at the scenery in silence, the memories the two of you made over the last two months playing in your head. 
“You know when I said I couldn’t see life as something beautiful? And that it wasn’t kind to me?” Joshua asks after a moment, and you nod your head, the memory fresh in your mind.
He lets out a breath, “Two months ago, life was so hard for me that I couldn’t even think of trying anymore. So I didn’t understand what you meant when you said that life was beautiful.” 
Your hand squeezes the railing, but you don’t turn to look at Joshua. You know that he wouldn’t want you to look at him as he addresses what he didn’t want to even mention for the last two months. 
Joshua glances at you, the sunset no longer capturing his attention. A small smile escapes him as he stares at you, heart warm within his chest. 
“I understand what you mean now.” You turn to look at him, immediately locking eyes with the ethereal man. The small smile on his face turns into a full one when he stares into your bright eyes, feeling happy just by being with you. 
Joshua turns away, looking back out towards the sunset. Your heart swells with warmth and heartbreak when you hear him say,
“Life is beautiful.” 
You don’t respond right away as you struggle to hold back the tears from escaping. Your eyes remain on the scenery laid before you, doing your best to control your breathing as you watch the sun set below the city. 
Letting out a breath, you feel Joshua turn to look at you with his soft eyes. 
Joshua’s happy, so you’re happy. 
You turn your body towards Joshua and give him a tight smile as you raise your arms into the air. The blonde grins, reaching out and taking the sikhye from your hand when he notices some of its contents spill onto the pavement from your gesture. You giggle at your clumsiness, and he just shakes his head. 
“What would you do without me?” Joshua asks with a smile, and you shrug your shoulders, turning and beginning to walk in the direction of the bus stop. He tilts his head at you, and he watches as you turn and glance at him with a smile. 
“I wouldn’t be as happy as I am now!” You answer, turning away before you get the chance to see Joshua’s reaction. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you swing your arms as you walk, suddenly wishing you had your sikhye in your hand. 
The sound of running footsteps makes you glance back, only to let out a loud laugh when Joshua’s arm suddenly wraps around your shoulders, the sound of his giggles ringing in your ear. He holds out the drink in your direction, and you grin, taking it from his grasp.
As you take a sip of the sweet rice drink, you let out a sigh. You take a peek at Joshua, finding the hint of a smile on his face as he drinks his own beverage in his other hand. He notices your eyes on him, and he looks at you, a warm expression forming on his face. He leans in and gently nudges your head with his, before turning back towards the front. 
It’s as if all the sadness, anger, and pain melts away from the fond gesture. A shy smile breaks out onto your face as you turn away, letting out a sigh of content.
“Ah, what a beautiful day.”
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Joshua glances down at his phone while he waits in the elevator as it goes up to the eighth floor, the floor in which your apartment resides.
april 6, 2021
You haven’t contacted Joshua since the day the two of you went to the dog café, let alone open his texts. He’s been texting you everyday and even calling you to try and get a response, but to no avail.
So he finally decided to go visit your apartment to check in on you and ask what happened. 
As the elevator doors open, Joshua steps out and walks down the hallway. Once he turns left to enter the other hall, his eyebrows furrow when he notices the man standing in front of your door. He walks up to the man, who glances up towards the blonde when he catches sight of him through the corner of his eye.
“Do you know yn?” Joshua asks once he’s a few feet away from the older man. The gentleman nods, holding up his ID card, “I’m their landlord.” 
Joshua almost lets out a breath of relief, finally having met someone who could possibly know where you’ve been. The blonde points towards your apartment door, “Yn hasn’t contacted me in like, two weeks. Do you know if they’re home or if they went somewhere-”
“You don’t know?” Your landlord asks, and Joshua pauses. A feeling of dread runs down his spine when he sees the look of pity appear in the older man’s eyes when Joshua shakes his head, no. 
The dread soon turns into regret when the landlord informs him of the information he hadn’t known for the last three months.
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“Are you comfortable?” The nurse asks as she replaces your tube. You give her a weak smile, glancing out the window and staring at the birds flying past it as you answer, “As comfortable as I can be.”
Once the nurse finishes cleaning you up, she bows in your direction and steps out of the room. You let out a breath, eyes trailing down to your phone. You press your finger to the screen, and the photo of Joshua that you took at the dog cafÊ shines back at you. 
A soft smile escapes you when you see how brightly he’s laughing, the sound of his joyful laughs still ringing in your ear as if he was here with you. The brief moment of happiness you feel turns into one of guilt when you’re reminded of all the messages, missed calls, and voicemails he’s left you for the last two weeks. 
It’s for the best, you remind yourself. You want him to be happy, and knowing that you’re on your literal deathbed would take that away from him. 
You bite the inside of your cheek once you feel the tears rise to your eyes, and you let out an annoyed huff. In an attempt to make the wetness to your eyes disappear, you move to stare up at the ceiling, only to freeze when your gaze lands on the doorway. 
“Joshua?” 
The blonde is standing there, chest rising and falling as he stares at you, pain evident in his gaze. His eyes trail over your appearance, wondering how he didn’t see the signs from the beginning. From the times you told him you were having trouble sleeping, the loss of appetite, how easily exhausted you would become from simply laughing too hard in the recent weeks.
How could he not know? 
“Yn.” Joshua breathes out, walking over to your bedside and sitting down in the chair. Feeling the tears flood your eyes, you look away from him, staring down at your hands in shame. 
“How did you find out?” You ask in a quiet voice, knowing he’s going to hate you for not telling him. When you don’t hear his response, the tears escape your eyes, falling onto the hospital blanket. 
“I’m so sorry Joshua.”
“I’m so selfish.” Your eyes widen slightly, and you look up from the blanket, only for your heart to break within your chest when you see the tears falling past Joshua’s eyes. 
“I-I hated my life and I openly complained about it in front of you, but you were going through so much worse and you still saw the beauty in it.” Joshua mutters, his hands reaching up towards his face as he tries to wipe away his tears. “I’m so sorry, yn.” You feel a sob bubble up in your chest, and you shake your head at him. 
“Don’t compare your struggles and pain to mine. Your struggles and your pain are valid. You have nothing to apologize for.” You tell him, vision becoming blurry as you reach out towards him with your hand. Joshua bites his bottom lip, before grasping your cold hand with his warm one. 
“It’s not fair.” Joshua mutters, and you blink at him. His hand tightens gently around yours, and he looks up into your beautiful eyes that hold so much life in them.
The life you deserve to live.
“I-It’s not fair. You of all people deserve to live your life.” Joshua says, the anger and sadness heavy in his voice. You let out a small smile, squeezing his hand with as much energy you can muster. “Sometimes life isn’t fair.”
Joshua just scoffs at your positivity and you let out a weak giggle. His eyes soften from the sight of your smile, and he reaches out with his free hand, wiping away your tears with his thumb. You lean into the touch, and Joshua feels his heart stutter in his chest. 
“Can you stay with me?” You ask, looking up into his deerlike eyes. Warmth floods the blonde’s face at how ethereal you are, feeling content when he still sees the sparkle in your eyes. 
“Yeah, always.”
Joshua slips off of his shoes and scoots you over on the hospital bed. He climbs onto it and lays onto his back beside you. You rest your head onto his arm, turning onto your side so that you’re facing him, and close your eyes at the feeling of his fingers intertwining with yours. 
“Thank you.” You mutter sleepily, and Joshua raises an eyebrow. 
“For what?” 
The memories of the last three months rewind in your head like a cassette tape, all the joy, laughter, sadness. All of it. 
“For making my last three months worthwhile.” 
Joshua sucks in a breath at your words, and he clenches his fist at his side. He’s filled with anger, sadness, so many different emotions as he turns his body to face you. He finds that you’re already fast asleep, small puffs of air leaving your lips, a reminder that you’re here. 
You’re alive.
Holding back the tears from rising, Joshua closes his eyes and gently rests his forehead onto yours. He feels your breath hit his lips, and he finds that it’s the only thing that calms him down as he feels a wave of drowsiness hit him.
He soon falls asleep with the thought of you turning to face him on the bridge two weeks ago, with the bright smile on your face that he’s grown to love.
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“Can I please take yn out of the hospital? They’re right at the entrance. It’s not like I’m taking yn to an amusement park.” 
“No, Joshua.” 
“But Dr. Park, please.” Joshua practically begs, following after your doctor as he tries to walk back to his office. The man doesn’t even spare the blonde another glance, already set on his answer. 
It’s been a week since Joshua discovered the truth of your illness, and he’s visited every single day. Even if he had classes or a shift at work, he’d immediately take the bus to the hospital right after to come and see you.
He knows your time is soon from how frail you’ve become, the exhaustion and pain evident on your face no matter how hard you try to hide it behind the smile you show him. 
That’s why he’s desperate for Dr. Park to say yes.
“I’ll even have the nurse accompany us! Please, it won’t take long.” Joshua calls out, and he watches as Dr. Park’s shoulders slump as he lets out a sigh. The older man turns to glance at him, “Joshua…”
“Please, Dr. Park. Yn—” Joshua looks down at his shoes, swallowing the lump in his throat as he tries to muster up the courage to say the next words. “Yn doesn’t have much time left.” 
Dr. Park stares at the blonde, knowing very well that your time is drawing near. He looks to his side, remembering what he told you the day you found out about your tragic fate. 
“Eat whatever you want, do things you’ve always wanted to do. Live your life, yn.” 
Dr. Park lets out a sigh, before turning back towards Joshua, who’s still staring down at the floor. He purses his lips, “Fine. You can take yn, but not for long. I’ll have their nurse accompany you.” 
Joshua immediately lifts up his head, eyes bright as he nods his head frantically. He blurts out multiple thank yous, even bowing at least ten times before he heads back to your hospital room. 
Dr. Park just lets out a sad smile as he watches the blonde disappear past the corner. Shaking his head, he glances down at his clipboard and heads towards his next patient. 
You lay in the hospital bed, struggling to keep your eyes open as you wait for Joshua. Your gaze is glued towards the doorway, wondering when you’ll see those pretty deerlike eyes of his. Your eyelids feel heavy, and you feel sleep beginning to pull you in. 
“Yn!” Your eyes slowly open at the angelic voice, and you find Joshua walking up to your hospital bed with an excited smile on his face. The corners of your lips tug upward, “Joshua, you look excited.”
“I have a surprise for you.” Your eyebrows furrow in suspicion, and he lets out a laugh. A sudden figure at your doorway catches your attention, and Joshua steps to the side so that you can see. You squint when you see your nurse standing there, a wheelchair in front of her as she gives you a smile. 
“What are you planning?” You ask, eyes going back to the blonde. He shrugs his shoulders, reaching out and grasping your cold hand, giving it a squeeze. 
“You’ll see.”
It takes about twenty minutes until you’re finally in the wheelchair, as you’re no longer able to walk on your own. It was hard, since Joshua had to help your nurse by carrying you and placing you into the seat. You kept apologizing for being a bother, but Joshua would always reply, 
“You could never be a bother, yn.”
And now you’re being pushed through the halls. With your nurse holding onto the IV pole while Joshua pushes you. You can’t help but feel a bit of excitement run through your veins as the three of you slowly make your way out of the hospital, no matter how exhausted you are.
“What’s the surprise? Did you buy me a sikhye truck?” 
“You think I’m rich?” Joshua counters, and you smile at his response. It’s when you’re closer to the automatic doors that you begin to feel your heartbeat faster, ecstatic to be able to smell the fresh air. 
“Are you ready?” Joshua asks, leaning over to peek at your face. You let out a shaky breath, before nodding your head and giving him a thumbs up. “Of course.” 
The blonde smiles, and starts pushing you towards the exit again, watching as the automatic doors open for the three of you. The sunlight shines down on you once you’re outside, and you suck in a deep breath of the fresh air, blinking your eyes to get used to the sudden light.
Once your eyes open again, you find Joshua standing before you, arms stretched up towards the sky. A pose that you always did when the two of you were together. You’re about to ask what he’s doing when a sudden flash of pink flies past your face. You turn your head, eyes following after it until it falls onto the ground next to dozens of others.
A cherry blossom petal. 
You slowly look back towards Joshua, seeing the warm smile on his face as he stares at you. Your eyes trail upwards, and you let out a breath when you see the fully bloomed cherry blossom trees above you. The brilliant shades of pink and white are hanging above you, and you feel your heart swell. 
A breeze blows past the trees, and you watch as the petals begin to fall around you and Joshua. The beautiful and delicate petals gently flow with the wind, as if they were pink snowflakes fluttering past you.
Opening up the palm of your hand, you watch as a precious petal falls directly into the middle of it. You let out a wet laugh, tears trailing down your cheeks as you look back up towards Joshua. He’s smiling back at you, eyes filled with tears of his own as the two of you stare at each other. 
“I saw the cherry blossoms with you.” You say softly, and Joshua nods his head, a heartbreaking smile on his face. Biting your bottom lip, you close your fingers around the precious petal in your hand, blinking away the tears that keep flooding your eyes.
“Thank you, Joshua.” You mutter, and the blonde simply lets out a sigh, turning so that he’s facing the cherry blossom tree. You look up towards him, seeing the small smile on his face as he glances back at you. 
“Consider it a gift, yn.”
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You lay on your hospital bed, listening to Joshua tell you about the lecture he attended today. Your heart warms when you hear him let out a giggle when mentioning something his classmate said, and a small smile escapes you. 
It’s been a few hours since you were brought back inside from seeing the cherry blossom trees, and Joshua’s stayed by your side the whole time. He didn’t even leave when you took a nap, just staying in the chair beside your bed doing his homework as he waited for you to wake up. 
You know that your time is almost over as you feel your heartbeat slow while listening to Joshua, finding yourself growing more sleepy. Somehow, rather than being afraid, you feel content. 
You’re happy.
You can see that Joshua knows it too, as he keeps talking to you about anything and everything, when you’d usually be the one to fill the silence. 
“And that’s how—”
“Joshua?” The blonde looks up at the sound of your voice immediately, and his heart falls when he sees the smile on your face. 
It’s different from all the ones before. It’s not bright, teasing, exciting, no. 
It’s accepting.
“Y-Yeah?” Joshua asks, and you extend your hand towards him. He reaches out and grasps it, your hand fitting perfectly within his own. 
“What’s the most beautiful thing about life?” You ask in a soft voice, staring into those deerlike eyes that seem to hold all the stars in the world. 
You want to remember it.
You want to remember him.
Joshua bites the inside of his cheek at your question, looking down at your connected hands as he tries to think of his answer. You watch as his eyebrows furrow in thought, and you grin in amusement at how hard he’s thinking.
The thought of the arcade comes to mind, as the neon purple lights shone on your face as you turned to look at him with a bright smile.
The sunset, when you spun around with your arms in the air and danced along the grass as he took photos of you. 
Going grocery shopping, when you were telling him a story with the softest of smiles on your face. Your eyes twinkled underneath the horrible fluorescent lights, and he wondered how you could possibly look so ethereal even with the bad lighting.
Your strawberry pajamas that you love so much.
Visiting the cat cafĂŠ, where your smile was the brightest and you were practically glowing from all the attention from the cats.
When it rained and you were laughing and spinning around as you let the raindrops fall onto you. Not a care in the world as you smiled brightly and extended your hand out towards him.
Going stargazing, except when he turned his head and looked into your eyes — he realized that you shined brighter than the millions of stars in the sky.
Joshua looks back towards you, seeing you waiting expectantly. His eyes trail over your features, from your beautiful eyes to your pretty lips that always hold a smile. He squeezes your hand softly as he finally answers,
“You.”
You blink at his answer, before a small smile breaks out onto your face. Looking away, you notice the full moon out the window, with the millions of stars surrounding it on this clear night. You let out a breath, feeling like they’re closer tonight. 
“What about you? What’s the most beautiful thing about life?” Joshua asks, and he watches as your head slowly turns back towards him. You give him a grin and squeeze his hand with as much energy as you can muster, finding yourself getting lost in his bright eyes. 
“You. The most beautiful thing about life is you, Joshua.” 
Joshua smiles, but his heart hurts as his eyes pan to your vital signs monitor, seeing that your heart rate is slowing. He looks back at you, and he sucks in a deep breath when only one thought comes to mind. 
There’s still so many things he wants to tell you, so many things he wants to do with you. However, as he stares into your eyes, he realizes there’s only one last thing you need to know.
“Yn?” 
“Yeah, Joshua?” You respond, now struggling to keep your eyes open as you stare at him. 
“I love you.” 
You and Joshua stare at each other in silence for a moment, having finally aired out the truth that the two of you have kept hidden for the last three months. The truth that the both of you kept denying, for fear of the future. A bright smile forms on your face, and Joshua feels his heart stutter within his chest at the sight. 
“I love you too, Joshua.” 
He lets out a breath, swallowing the lump in his throat to try and appear strong for you. As Joshua stares at you, he realizes just how beautiful you are. Even though you’re frail and tired, your beauty is unmatched as he looks into your eyes. 
And so, Joshua smiles back at you, and you feel warmth flood your body at the beauty of it.
You hope to remember his smile even in your next life.
Joshua hears your monitor begin to beep, signalling that your heart rate is dropping. He doesn’t look away from you, holding the eye contact between the two of you as your eyes slowly fall shut. The grip you had on his hand loosens, and he continues to stare at you as your nurse comes in once the sound of the flatline rings throughout the room. 
Joshua stands up from the chair, heart thumping against his chest once your nurse turns off your monitor. 
“Time of death: Tuesday, April 13th. At 8:13 PM.”
Silence fills the room as he leans down and presses a soft kiss to your temple, before pulling away and falling back into the chair. The smile that he showed you is now gone as he bites his bottom lip, trying to hold back the tears that threaten to fall as he stares at you, the smallest of smiles still remaining on your face.
Joshua looks down as a few tears escape, and he slowly rests his forehead onto your guys’ connected hands, sobs finally wracking through his body as he holds onto you. 
The moon and the stars shine down onto the two of you through the hospital window. They illuminate the room as Joshua sobs against your hand, knowing that you were finally able to reach them. 
You were finally able to reach the moon and the stars.
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april 13, 2022
Joshua looks away from the calendar on the wall once he’s handed the bouquet of bright sunflowers. He smiles at the employee, giving them his thanks before he turns around and walks out of the store. 
The sun shines down on him as he walks towards the columbarium, making his black hair appear a light brown underneath the light. 
The sound of the birds chirping rings through his ears, and he smiles softly as he steps in through the entrance. He walks through the hall, before he finally stops, looking up and seeing your bright smile shining back at him.
Joshua lets out a grin at the sight, placing your sunflowers into the mini slot that holds the bouquets. A breath escapes him as he stares at the photos in your display, all of the photos capturing your beautiful smile. His eyes land on the last one, and he bites the inside of his cheek.
It’s the photostrip of the two of you from the day you both went to the dog café. 
Joshua has the same photostrip on the back of his phone case, as a reminder of a beautiful day. 
“Did you miss me?” Joshua asks you, knowing that he won’t receive a response. He smiles softly, looking down at his shoes. 
“It’s been a year without you, and I still think of your bright smile everyday.” Joshua tells you, placing his hands into his pockets as he continues to stare at the floor. “I know you’re getting a kick out of hearing me say that, huh?” 
Joshua stands there before you in silence for a moment, holding back the tears that threaten to flood his eyes. He lets out a shaky breath, before looking back up towards you with a smile and begins to update you on everything that’s happened since he last visited.
From the new job he got at an early learning center as a teacher, to the cat he visits at the shelter that reminds him of you, to his new friend Jeonghan who’s more mischievous than you could imagine, to the fried rice he made in the morning.
He tells you anything and everything until he can no longer think of anything else to say. Joshua lowers his head, wishing that he could hear a response. 
“I miss you.” He mutters, the thought of your smile and contagious laugh coming to mind. There’s a dull ache in his heart that has remained since you passed, and he knows it will be there for a long time. 
But as he lifts up his head to look at you and sees the photo of the both of you laughing, he knows he’ll be okay. You want him to be happy.
Joshua sucks in a deep breath, before reaching up and resting his hand over the glass. 
“Thank you, yn. Thank you for teaching me how to live.” 
Joshua gives you a genuine smile, before taking a step back from your locker. 
“I’ll continue to live happily, so don’t worry about me. I’ll visit you again soon...” Joshua chuckles as he trails off, looking away as warmth floods his face at the thought of the next thing he wants to tell you. He lets out a breath, before smiling at you as he says,
“I love you.” 
And with that, Joshua turns around and walks away with a lighter heart. He steps out of the columbarium and walks down the street, the thought of your smile and the sound of your laugh lingering in his mind. 
He walks with his head down, hands in his pockets as he heads to the bus stop. It’s only when a pink petal floats past him that he pauses and finally looks up from the ground.��
The fully bloomed cherry blossoms are a few feet from him, planted on the grass near the sidewalk, painting the pavement pink. He watches as a breeze blows past him, making hundreds of cherry blossom petals gently fall from the trees. 
Joshua lets out a small smile at the sight, before looking up towards the blue sky. A content sigh escapes him as he watches a pretty white cloud float past him. 
“What a beautiful day.”
913 notes ¡ View notes
helloalycia ¡ 4 years ago
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my patient’s neighbour [four] // wanda maximoff
summary: taking Wanda to meet your parents wasn't the best decision in hindsight...
warning/s: none i don't think?
author's note: i’m not sure what to say other than sorry in advance oops
part one | part two | part three | part five | part six | part seven | masterlist | wattpad
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The restaurant my parents chose wasn't too flashy but rather comforting and homely, with an Italian theme and matching cuisine. It was bustling with people, but it didn't take long for Wanda and I to find my parents sat at the back waiting for us.
"You gonna be okay?" I asked, glancing at her with a comforting squeeze of the hand.
"I've got you, haven't I?" she asked playfully, her accent thicker than usual as she spoke. And though she was joking, I knew there was truth to her words which sent the butterflies in my stomach into a frenzy.
"You're cute," I said with adoration, appreciating how lovely her eyes looked in the dimly-lit restaurant. "Come on."
Hand in hand, we approached my parents' table and I had hopes that tonight would go well. My parents weren't exactly intimidating – at least anyone I'd ever known hadn't got that impression – but I still worried for Wanda. Unlike her, I couldn't read minds, so I couldn't tell if she was actually looking forward to tonight or if she was just doing it for me.
"Y/N, you're here!" my mum exclaimed with a grin when she spotted me.
"I am," I said with a nervous smile, before motioning to Wanda. "And so is Wanda, my girlfriend."
"Yes, Y/N mentioned you would be coming," my mum said with a friendly smile, looking to Wanda, before motioning to the table. "Please, sit, sit."
I squeezed Wanda's hand gently before pulling out a chair for her. She smiled at me appreciatively before I took a seat beside her, facing my parents.
"It's nice to finally meet you, Wanda," my dad said with a nod. "Y/N mentioned you plenty of times when we'd call to catch up with her."
"You, too," Wanda spoke politely. "Both of you. Y/N told me that you're travelling the world, is that right?"
I leaned on my hand and glanced at Wanda, who shot me a mischievous smile. Quirking a brow, I mentally applauded her. Getting my parents to talk about their travels was an easy way of bonding with them – they would tell every server and customer in this restaurant about their travelling if they could. She'd cracked them instantly.
I'm just that good, milashka (cutie).
Trying not to laugh as her words echoed in my mind because of her powers, I leaned back into my seat and listened in as my parents went into a ramble about their ongoing adventures. This was pretty much how the rest of the evening went, as the four of us dined on expensive wine and delicious pizza. They seemed to be getting along well, with Wanda asking all the right questions and giving them her picture-perfect smile that impressed all the elders. Heck, she was even impressing me.
Naively, I appreciated how well the evening was going until my parents decided to talk to Wanda about her career.
"So, Y/N mentioned you're one of those Revengers," my mum remembered as we ate.
"Avengers," I corrected her, mildly embarrassed.
Wanda chuckled, glancing at me, before nodding. "Yes, I am. For over a year now, I've been working with them."
"Them being Iron Man, Captain America, the Black Widow...?" my dad asked, looking up as if trying to remember the rest, further embarrassing me.
"Those are the ones," Wanda quipped with a nod.
My mum hummed in response as my dad nodded before leaning back in his seat and eyeing Wanda curiously.
"I can't imagine your job is the safest," he began. "You protect people from threats, right? Keep them safe."
Wanda seemed caught off guard, but recovered quickly. "It's got it's... dangers, yes. But I can handle myself. I've got powers and I know how to use them."
"You do," my dad agreed, before his eyes flickered to me briefly. "But Y/N doesn't. She's just a regular human."
I set my fork down on my plate and looked to him calmly. "Dad, what are you saying?"
"No, it's fine," Wanda said reassuringly, resting her hand on my leg under the table. I grabbed it and held it as she continued to speak to my father. "Y/N doesn't have powers, you are correct."
"And dating an Avenger, I can imagine, must put a huge target on her back," he said with concern, and my mum nodded in agreement. "How can we be certain that she is safe?"
"Dad!"
"Your father is right, Y/N," my mum said, giving me a look, before her expression softened as she looked to a startled Wanda. "We're not implying that you're incapable, Wanda. We can clearly see that you care about our daughter. And you're a lovely person. You're pretty much perfect."
Wanda swallowed hard. "But?"
My mother frowned. "But dating you is bound to put our Y/N in danger. She could get hurt just for being involved with you, with your friends. She doesn't have powers to protect herself. And I can't imagine you're around her all the time to keep her safe."
As angry as I was at my parents for saying this stuff – even if they were saying it out of love – memories of the incident flashed to mind. They were right, but it was a risk I'd accepted when dating Wanda. What good was it doing by bringing this up now?
Noticing Wanda's silence, I spoke up instead. "I appreciate your concern, guys, but I'm an adult. I understand the danger I may be put in by being with Wanda. But I love her and I know that she is here for me if anything were to ever happen."
"We know," my father said, giving me a small nod. "We just thought we'd share our opinion anyway. It's been weighing on us for a while is all."
I sighed quietly. I couldn't exactly fault them for that.
"Anyway, never mind that," my mum said, setting down her fork. "Now that we've got that out the way, let's order some dessert, yeah? Our treat."
Nodding, I let my parents get excited as they perused the dessert menus before them. Instead, I looked to the quiet brunette beside me and saw how lost in thought she was, eyes focused on the table and stuck in a daydream.
With the hand that was holding hers, I patted her hand with my thumb to earn her attention. She looked up suddenly, questioning gaze falling to me. I frowned and quirked a brow, wondering if she was okay. She forced a smile my way, squeezing my hand reassuringly, but I didn't believe her. I also couldn't question it right in front of my parents, so I decided to speak with her later.
Dessert went by quickly as Wanda, suddenly, wasn't very talkative. I didn't know if my parents noticed, but I sure did and I felt extremely guilty. If I had known of my parents' concerns, I never would have brought Wanda to meet them tonight.
After the evening came to a close and we all stepped out of the restaurant, I expected to be going home with my parents since we lived together, but they claimed they had more plans together tonight.
"Wow, you guys have more of a social life than we do," I joked when they told me to make my own way home.
Wanda barely smiled and I felt bad.
"We'll be back in a few hours," my mum promised, before pulling me in for a hug. "Tonight was fun. A great final night before we leave tomorrow."
I returned the hug and as I gave my dad one, I heard Wanda thanking my mum for the lovely evening halfheartedly. After saying our final goodbyes, Wanda led me to her car in silence, giving me time to try and put some jumbled thoughts together coherently.
As she had been for the past hour, Wanda was quiet on the drive back to my place. Whenever I would glance in her direction, she'd be chewing on her lip and focusing on driving, though the blank expression on her face made me think that maybe she was distracted. It didn't take a genius to know she was thinking about my parents' words and I suddenly felt guilty for putting that all on her.
"I'm sorry," I blurted halfway through the journey. "I'm sorry for what they said. It wasn't fair of them, I know that. They just... they meant well, Wanda, they really did." I tucked my hands under my thighs, wincing as their words echoed in my mind. "It doesn't change anything though, y'know? We're still us. We're still okay. I don't want you to feel like anything's changed because it hasn't."
I paused, swallowing hard, and glanced her way. She didn't even look my way, still in the same position as she was before I started to speak. Looking back to the road ahead, I let out a disappointed sigh, figuring she wasn't in a talking mood. I didn't blame her, but I hoped she would have understood what I meant.
The remainder of the drive was like this, Wanda deep in thought and me huddled under an imaginary blanket of guilt. When we finally reached my house, she turned the engine off and I waited for her to say something, literally anything. Her fingers drummed against the steering wheel mindlessly and I figured she was out of words for tonight.
"I'll ring you in the morning," I mumbled quietly, opening the car door. "If you want to speak, that is."
Leaving her there, I grabbed my bag and headed to the front door, but stopped when I heard her get out the car, too. Waiting, I turned around and watched as she approached me, eyebrows knitted in thought.
"Please say something," I said with pleading eyes.
She licked her lips, biting her lower lip so hard I'm surprised she didn't draw blood. Finally, she released it and looked to me with apologetic eyes.
"Your parents were right," she said.
I blinked with confusion. "What?"
She nodded, looking down at her shoes momentarily. "They were right, what they said. My life puts you in danger."
"Yeah, I know," I agreed, crossing my arms. "I knew that when I got with you, but that doesn't change anything."
She gave a disbelieving smile. "Seriously? Y/N, that changes everything."
"No, it doesn't," I told her sternly, growing frustrated. "This is the stuff you sacrifice when you love someone."
She sighed, shaking her head and looking away. "You shouldn't have to."
"But I chose to," I said, clenching my jaw.
"Don't you remember what happened last time?" she asked, stepping forward and holding my hand. "The incident?"
"We said we wouldn't talk about that," I reminded her with a low voice.
"But you remember, right? When they took you and I wasn't there? They could've hurt you!"
"Shut up!" I told her, raising my voice. Pulling my hand away from hers and taking a step back, I continued, "Why are you saying that? You came! You helped me!"
"But what if they did something to you before I got there?" she snapped. "What if I hadn't got to you on time?"
The memories came spilling into my mind, escaping the locked box I kept them in. Tears burned the corner of my eyes as I tried to think about anything else.
"You remember how scared you were?" Wanda asked, frowning at me with exasperated eyes. "You couldn't be by yourself for weeks!"
"Why are you doing this?!" I yelled, clenching my fists. "Why are you trying to frighten me?!"
"Because you should be frightened!" she retorted, stepping closer to me. Her dark green eyes were swirling storms of rage as she added, "It could happen again!"
I shoved her away from me, pinching the bridge of my nose with annoyance. Tears slipped from my eyes at the terrifying memory of what happened, what could have gone wrong, but I ignored them as I swallowed down the lump in my throat. Why the hell was she acting like this? Making me so angry at her for no reason?
"It's not even just that," she continued, jaw tensed. "How many times do I get hurt because of work and you get worried?"
"That's because I care about you," I muttered through stinging eyes.
"This will always be my life," she said, a hint of regret in her words as she looked to me. "I can't change it."
"I'm not asking you to!"
"Exactly! You're not! Which means you'll suck it up and stay with me and will live your life in constant concern for my well-being. It's not right."
I opened my mouth to respond because what she was saying was entirely stupid. But my emotions got the better of me and no words came out. Instead, my bottom lip quivered as I sucked up a breath.
"I need time to think," she suddenly said, anger disappearing from her voice and being replaced with an astute calmness.
My gaze snapped her way and through blurry vision, I watched her step back with her hands on her hips.
"So you can what – think about breaking up with me?" I said bitterly, and despite my anger, I didn't expect her to look at me with a softened expression, meaning my words were correct.
"Maybe it's better that way, Y/N," she said gently, eyes meeting mine.
I squeezed my hands together and tried to breathe through the pent-up anger that she'd caused, but the longer she stared at me, waiting for a response, the more I wanted to explode.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" I muttered, scrunching my eyebrows together.
She pressed her lips together, looking away, and it only pissed me off more.
"Are you fucking kidding me, Wanda?!" I yelled. "You're quitting on our relationship because, what, you think I'm in danger? Well, news flash, honey, the worst already happened and I'm still here!"
She barely flinched as she avoided my eyes.
"You're a fucking coward!" I said, pointing at her. "If you needed an excuse to end things, you could have just said so!"
Breathing out, I wiped my tears away shakily. I expected her to argue back, to realise she'd made a mistake and regretted her words, but as I waited, I knew she was certain of her decision.
"Fine," I settled, brimming with rage. "Fuck off, Wanda."
Still, nothing.
Turning on my heel, I stormed to my front door and went through my keys with difficulty, hands shaking with anger. I heard Wanda's car door shut from behind me but didn't bother turning around. I clearly didn't need to as I heard the tyres screech against the road and knew she was gone.
Kicking my door with frustration, I found the key and opened up before heading inside and slamming the door behind me. How dare she break up with me because of something that I chose off my own back! She just gave up like we meant nothing to her, not even bothering to talk things out with me! And selfishly, she left me feeling pissed and resenting her more than I ever thought I would.
"What a bitch!" I shouted into the empty house, throwing my keys to the side harshly.
When they clinked against glass, I looked up and saw the vase of flowers Wanda had given me before dinner.
"The first and fucking last," I said dryly, before grabbing ahold of it and throwing it against the wall without thinking.
The glass shattered on impact, leaving a mess of water, flowers and small shards on the wooden floor. I looked at it, the brokenness resembling how my heart felt. As the adrenaline of my actions and previous angry words wore off, all that was left was hurt and pain and oh God, Wanda was gone. She'd left me. She'd given up.
I sank to the floor, pulling my legs up to my chest, and hugged them tightly. Stifling my cries, I dug myself into my knees and felt a pain in my heart. Why didn't she fight for us? Did she not love me enough? Was I not enough?
—
"You ignored the memes I sent you, I thought you died."
As Natasha pushed right past me and into my house, I blinked with disbelief.
"Sure, come right in," I mumbled sarcastically, closing the front door.
Following after Natasha, I found her making herself at home in the living room, plonking herself on the couch and pulling her feet up comfortably.
"You could have sent an emoji or something," she continued, giving me a knowing look. "They were some good memes."
"Well, forgive me if I wasn't in the mood," I said sourly, joining her on the couch.
Her playful smile faded as she picked up on my words. "How are you doing, sweetie?"
I ran a hand through my hair and leaned my elbow on the back of the couch, getting comfortable. It had been two weeks since Wanda broke up with me and in those two weeks, I hadn't been doing particularly well. I guess you could say I was still in a slump. A horrible, tiresome, angry, sadness-filled slump.
"I'm fine."
She pursed her lips, looking like she wanted to argue, but thankfully, she didn't. I was glad – the last thing I wanted was to prove that I was okay when, really, all I wanted to do was curl in a ball and suffocate under my duvet.
"I'm sorry," she said, resting her hand on mine. "If it's any consolation, I think Wanda made a huge mistake."
"Ah, so she told you," I said with a nod of realisation. I hadn't told Natasha the specifics of why we broke up, but clearly Wanda did. I guess it made sense – they were teammates. If anything, I was surprised Natasha still wanted to speak to me, instead expecting her to side with her friend.
"She did," Natasha answered. "And I think she's an idiot, but that's not my business. I just came here to make sure you were okay."
"Really? I thought you wanted to show me the memes," I said jokingly, trying to lighten the mood with a small smile.
She chuckled, slapping my hand gently. "That, too... but seriously."
My smile faded as I looked down, my finger playing with my trousers distractedly. "I'm not okay, but I'll get there." I began to glare at my trousers, my anger for the witch returning. "I have to be. Because she doesn't want me anymore... fuck her."
"I'd rather not," Natasha mumbled.
Though my anger was present, making me tense like it had been the last few weeks, I couldn't help but smile at Natasha's words. Then laughter bubbled from my lips and for the first time since Wanda left, I felt momentarily happy.
"I'm glad we can still be friends," Natasha said, making me look to her with a smile. "I know that you and Wanda are over now... but I still like hanging out with you."
"Me, too," I said in agreement. "Thanks for coming to check in. You didn't have to."
"Yeah, I did." She nodded before offering me a small, encouraging smile. "You're gonna be okay, y'know."
I wanted to believe her, but despite how pissed I was at Wanda, I still loved her. And I couldn't imagine stopping, though I knew I'd have to if I was to make it through this.
—
Getting over Wanda was a difficult process. Everything I felt was a mixture of resentment, exhaustion and misery because I missed her. I missed being able to call her when I saw somebody do something stupid in public; I missed kissing her when I hadn't seen her in a long time; I missed hearing her adorable accent first thing when I woke up after she spent the night; I missed her.
Two months followed the breakup and the only time I'd see her was when she'd dodge Anna's apartment upon knowing I was going to take care of her. I guess I was glad in that sense, as it meant I wouldn't have to deal with her awkwardly. But it also made me feel like shit because it meant she didn't care about me at all. Clearly our breakup wasn't affecting her like it did with me.
And it was definitely affecting me.
I was scrolling through Instagram one day when I saw a particular post on my feed from Natasha's account. Yeah, one of the Avengers had a private Instagram account. She gave me her username when she saw me on it one day and I remember being so confused to how she had it.
"I'm an Avenger, not a hermit," was her response, and from that day onwards, we followed each other.
So, I saw a post on her Instagram and it was some goofy photo of her, Tony, Bruce and Wanda. They were posing with exaggerated smiles as Natasha grinned up front; the caption said something about working long days, but I wasn't paying much attention as, naturally, my gaze fell to Wanda.
Just like everyone else, she had a playful, exaggerated smile on her lips like nothing kept her down, but what stood out was the sling around her arm and the cast underneath. It must have happened in a mission or something and it wasn't my business, but I couldn't help but worry. Was she okay? Was she looking after herself? I wanted to text Natasha and ask, but I stopped myself.
She'd broken up with me for this very reason. I wasn't agreeing with it, but for a second, I did see why she'd made her point. It still wasn't fair though. She didn't get to make that choice for me.
We weren't together anymore, I reminded myself. She broke up with me. It had been two months and I needed to let go. If she didn't care about me, why should I waste my time and energy caring about her?
Not letting it get to me anymore, I simply liked the post before continuing my scrolling. Though I knew that deep down, her face was imprinted in my mind and I still worried for her well-being.
—
The fourth month following our breakup was when I properly saw Wanda again, excluding the times she would duck out of Anna's apartment upon my arrival to care for her. It was also the first time since the breakup that Wanda made the effort to speak to me.
I was sat eating dinner on my day off when I got a call from the hospital nearby, interrupting my meal. The nurse was explaining how Anna had fallen over and hurt her back and was now in a hospital room. She was calling me because she thought I'd like to know since I was her registered nurse and carer. I was glad to get the call, immediately pulling my shoes and coat on and rushing over there to make sure she was okay. She didn't have anyone else apart from Wanda and I – it was no question I had to go.
Though, of course, I didn't really think about the fact that Wanda may be there until I saw her there. I also didn't consider the fact that I was wearing my pyjamas when I stepped in the lift and headed to Anna's floor. Too late now.
After asking the receptionist where Anna's room was, I found Wanda hanging around it outside the door. With only Anna on my mind, I approached her and tried to hide my panic. She spotted me instantly, stopping her pacing and looking to me with tired eyes and a frown on her face.
I didn't care that she looked worried, nor that she was holding up well since we last spoke in anger. I didn't care that she'd dyed her hair a reddish-brown colour, nor that she managed to pull off both that and the whole 'loungewear' look in a place surrounded by blinding white and blue. I didn't care that my heart ached when her green eyes found mine, nor that I missed seeing her so close and not in my dreams for once. I didn't care about any of it. Or, at least, I tried to tell myself that.
"What happened?" I cut straight to the point, stopping in front of her. "Is Anna okay?"
Wanda nodded instantly. "She's fine. She tripped over her dining room chair and hurt her back. The doctors just checked her out and said it's nothing too serious, but she won't be able to walk for a while."
I pressed my lips together, feeling the panic wear off at the sound of good news. Anna had always been more than just a patient to me and the last thing I wanted was to hear she'd hurt herself badly.
"Can I see her?" I asked Wanda, quirking a brow.
"Yeah, of course," Wanda said, before looking away awkwardly. "I was just waiting out here for you. The nurse said you were coming."
I chose to say nothing as I walked past her and into Anna's room, seeing the older woman laying on a hospital bed and staring at the ceiling. When she noticed my presence, she smiled at me and motioned for me to join her side.
"It's so good to see you, milaya (sweetie)," she said happily, as I stopped by her side, "but you didn't have to come! I'm not dying."
I heard Wanda enter the room behind me, but she took a seat on the chairs opposite the bed. Ignoring her, I smiled down at Anna and grabbed her hand.
"Don't say that," I told her gently. "Of course I'm here. You're my number one priority. I had to make sure you were okay!"
Anna waved her hand in typical Anna fashion. "I've suffered worse. I'm absolutely fine."
I knew it was best not to question her, so I didn't.
"I'm glad you're both here," she said, looking between Wanda and I, making me swallow awkwardly.
Since breaking up, I hadn't mentioned it to Anna, but she wasn't stupid and she'd clearly noticed that we weren't spending time together anymore. I didn't know if Wanda had told her, but if she had, Anna never mentioned anything. Like now, she simply looked between us both with a grateful smile, unaware of how awkward we felt.
Thankfully, the awkward silence was interrupted when a doctor walked in the room. After introducing herself, I asked if I could speak to her outside about Anna and she happily obliged. She told me about Anna's condition and how it would affect the way I cared for her, especially regarding her new medication, and I asked anything and everything to make sure she was truly okay. After being reassured that she was, I thanked the doctor and returned to Anna's room, only to find Wanda and Anna in a heated a argument.
I couldn't tell what had got them so fussy as they were bickering in Russian, sentences too fast for me to comprehend with my limited knowledge of the language. It got to a point where Anna began slapping Wanda on the arm, looking angrier than ever, so I stepped between them and pulled Wanda away.
"What the hell is going on here?" I interrupted, holding Anna's slapping hand down to the bed and raising a hand to keep Wanda at bay. I looked between them, seeing the frustration in both their expressions, and asked questioningly, "Well?"
Wanda said nothing, eyes avoiding mine as usual, so I looked down to Anna who was glancing between us before spouting off into another ramble in Russian, trying to grab Wanda so she could yell at her directly. To my annoyance, Wanda tried to push past me, yelling back, and I was unfortunately caught in the middle as I attempted to keep them from ripping each other's throats out.
Thankfully, their bickering came to a halt when an unknown voice called into the room: "What is going on in here?"
I looked to the door, following the mystery voice, and saw a young woman, maybe in her thirties, standing in the doorway and looking between the three of us with confusion. I had no idea who she was, though she seemed familiar. Judging from the confusion Wanda had, she didn't seem to know either.
"Sasha," Anna breathed out with surprise, and then I realised. That was Anna's granddaughter. "What are you doing here?"
386 notes ¡ View notes
fitjourneydaily ¡ 11 months ago
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The Importance of Proper Posture, Ergonomic Supports, Joint Alignment, and Muscle Strength for a Healthy Body
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In today's digital age, many of us spend a significant amount of time sitting and working at desks, leading to various physical discomforts and health issues. However, by understanding the significance of proper posture, ergonomic supports, joint alignment, and muscle strength, we can take proactive steps towards maintaining a healthy and pain-free body. In this article, we will explore the importance of these factors and provide practical tips for incorporating them into our daily lives. Section 1: Proper Posture Good posture is the foundation of a healthy body. It involves aligning the various segments of our body, including the head, neck, spine, and limbs, in an optimal position to prevent unnecessary strain. By maintaining proper posture, we can avoid muscle imbalances, reduce the risk of developing musculoskeletal disorders, and improve overall well-being. To achieve proper posture: 1. Sit up straight, with your back pressed against the chair's backrest, and avoid slumping or leaning forward. 2. Keep your feet flat on the ground or use a footrest if needed to maintain balance. 3. Position your computer screen at eye level to reduce strain on the neck and eyes. 4. Take frequent breaks to stretch and move around, promoting circulation and relieving muscle tension. Section 2: Ergonomic Supports Incorporating ergonomic supports into our work environments can have a significant impact on our overall comfort and health. Ergonomics focuses on adapting the workspace to fit the individual, rather than trying to fit the individual into the workspace. Key ergonomic supports to consider: 1. Use an adjustable chair with lumbar support to maintain the natural curve of the spine. 2. Ensure your desk height allows your elbows to rest comfortably at a 90-degree angle. 3. Utilize a keyboard and mouse that provide proper wrist support to prevent strain. 4. Invest in an ergonomic chair cushion or backrest for additional lumbar support. Section 3: Joint Alignment When our joints are properly aligned, they work together efficiently and experience less wear and tear. Misalignment of joints can lead to discomfort, limited range of motion, and an increased risk of injury. Tips for joint alignment: 1. Practice gentle joint mobility exercises to promote flexibility and alignment. 2. Avoid excessive repetitive movements that could strain the joints. 3. Engage in activities that strengthen the supporting muscles around the joints, such as yoga or resistance training. 4. Maintain a healthy weight to alleviate unnecessary stress on the joints. Section 4: Muscle Strength Building and maintaining muscle strength is crucial for overall health and posture. Strong muscles not only support the body's structure but also enhance our ability to perform daily tasks with ease. Ways to improve muscle strength: 1. 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