#rajneeti fanfic

[hum-suffer]

Of course, you'll hurt me (Rajneeti) part 5

With Samar's glasses over her eyes, Amrita stands at a corner and stares off in the distance, remembering the last time she wore something belonging to Samar.

(It was the day they last met. She was wearing his jeans jacket. He'd made her smile and laugh and he'd made it her best day. And then, he never talked to her again. He avoided her calls, never answered her messages and emails. Amrita shoved the jean jacket in the spare storeroom of her house the very day he left india.)

(The sense of belongingness in her chest is heavy as a panic attack as she feels the frames of his sunglasses licking her ears. She hates him for coming back and for ruining the control she sowed over the years.)

That guy has guts, is what Amrita thinks as she is left alone in the car while Prithvi goes to give his prepared speech. This Suraj guy is somehow a bit correct in his place but Amrita has never been enough of a satyavadi to actually appreciate his tirade. Behind her sunglasses, she rolls her eyes and wishes she could instead her some random songs instead of this irritating battle of words. It's getting on her nerves.

Apparently, Prithvi doesn't have too much patience too. He reiterates that Jeevan Kumar will be the candidate from Azad nagar, and the guy huffs, turning away and leaving a crowd behind, that's cheering his name.

God, what a mess.

Despite the sunglasses, Amrita contemplates getting herself another pain killer and an expresso. With the amount of reports here, she knows it'll be plastered all over the net about how the Rashtrawadi party isn't doing well in Azad nagar, especially with it being an area set up by the party itself years ago. Some sort of sick irony.

Prithvi bhaiya has a shrewd look about himself when he finally walks down the stage and Amrita knows she's in for a rant as soon as she shares a look with Harsh.

As soon as they're seated in the car, Prithvi snarls. "I want details on that guy. Immediately."

"Already on it," Amrita says, pulling off the glasses and putting them back in the compartment. She's seen this guy, she knows him. "He's Ram Kaka's son, Suraj. He's got a lot of friends and he's a local hero, from what Kaka has told me."

Prithvi narrows his eyes at her. "You know him?"

"I know your driver and I'm decent enough to talk to him," she retorts, clenching her jaw at his tone. She knows he is angry and Prithvi has never quite managed to have a better temperament. Whenever he's angry, he destroys everything around him. Typical male anger.

(Amrita would know. Her father has the same explosive anger.)

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Dev is absolutely unsurprised when she goes to pick him up, her hair in a mess and her clothes creased. Harsh had offered to drop her but she'd rather spend time one on one with her little brother than this hovering feeling of being involved in the politics.

Just because she dabbled a little into politics while in college, and just because she's Prithvi's assistant, it doesn't mean that she's just going to sit down and let the possibile political implications ruin her time with her brother.

Dev's blue berry icecream tastes horrible and chalky, leaving a layer of dryness on her tongue when she takes a bite. She scowls at Dev as he laughs,"Of course, I knew you wouldn't like it."

"Why offer it at all?"

"You made bhindi yesterday despite knowing I hate it," he shrugs,"Balance tallied."

Amrita narrows her eyes as she takes a tiny bite of her pineapple icecream. "It is definitely not tallied. I'll be making bhindi again, just to irritate you now."

"I won't eat it!" He sticks out his now blue tongue at her, despite knowing that he needs to eat whatever she makes, of course.

Amrita raises an eyebrow. "You'll eat what I make or starve. Now, tell me, what did you eat for lunch? Abhi and Khushi didn't come to college today?"

Dev steals a bite from her icecream and shakes his head. "They did come, but they left earlier to go on a date."

"Ah, young love," Amrita exaggerates with a sigh,"You still have no crushes in your faculty?"

Dev rolls his eyes and shakes his head vehemently. "Absolutely not. I'd just rather stay focused on myself. I don't think I can juggle too many responsibilities. I need to score the goddamn best in the class."

Amrita throws away his empty cup and gives him the remaining half of her icecream. She swats his head before ruffling his hair affectionately. "I love you, Dev, but you need to understand that I have no expectations from you. I don't need you to top. I need you to enjoy your life and just maintain good grades. You don't need to be the best in that class, you're already the best boy I know."

Dev yawns and nods. "Yeah, I know, but I just want to make you proud."

Amrita feeds him a spoonful of the icecream and kisses the side of his head. "I'm always proud of you, no matter what. Don't force yourself into anything because of mental or peer pressure." Amrita wishes she could say more, do more. He's her everything. He's the Sun of her universe.

"Yeah." He doesn't look unconvinced but the typical aversion to emotions has returned and Amrita huffs out a laugh at him, urging him to eat up the icecream quickly so that she can go to drop him off back home.

He sideyes her when she buys a coffee to go for herself but doesn't say anything about it, talking to her about his college instead. There's going to be some fresher's party soon, he says, tone hopeful and wondering.

He says this as they reach home, knowing that she immediately has to leave and hence can't give him a whole lecture or interrogate him about all the details of this farewell party.

"Send me the details, I'll pay the amount by evening." She grins at his answering whoop. Under other circumstances, she'd have had more questions for him, but she'd have let him go anyways and she knows he deserves a treat after the fiasco yesterday. She hopes that no other day comes where he has to spend the night alone in their home.

"You're still going to be back home by 11 pm, you hear me?"

Dev bounces on the ball of his feet as he nods feverently, almost vibrating in excitement. "Thank you, thank you, thank you! I promise, I'll be back at the dot!"

Amrita shakes her head at him and starts to leave. "I'll see you for dinner, be safe!"

She doesn't leave until Dev is back in the house.

Two blocks later, she parks on the side of the road and downs the coffee as soon as she can, hoping her stomach won't grumble when she goes back to the Pratap residence. In between the travel time to and fro Dev's college, the issue with Surya Kumar, and the media fallout of it, Amrita hasn't had the time to have a proper meal. The ice cream and coffee aren't actual meals, but they'll sustain her until she can come back home for dinner.

She sighs deeply, wishing that she could just run away from the problem and take a long vacation.

Her phone rings, and it's Indu.

Amrita cusses thoroughly as she picks up the call.

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Walking in the Pratap house, Amrita takes in the sight of Chandra uncle and Prithvi hunched over the table, talking in hushed tones. She drops the files of investors and the poster sketch on the table near them, greeting Bharti aunty quietly before she sits down across Prithvi.

She ties her hair in a quick bun, and puts her earrings in the pocket, starting to adjust the schedule for the next day.

"You have a meeting with Mr. Bajaj tomorrow, 9 a.m." She tells Prithvi, writing down the location, the time, the particulars and the members of the meeting in the organised order that she's been doing for years.

Prithvi shakes his head. "Postpone it."

"Why and at what time?" She asks, barely stopping herself from gritting her teeth in irritation at his presumptive nature.

"I'm going out with Samar, to get him a watch. Write that down. We'll go to the Casio and Titan showrooms. I did tell him he could even get Cartier but he's stuck on the vintage looks for Titan." Prithvi says, the last sentence directed to Chandra uncle, who nods with a chuckle.

Amrita sighs and puts a reminder in her phone to call Rithik, Mr. Bajaj's secretary, for the change of time. Knowing the two men, it'll take at least an hour for them to select a watch and it'll take another half hour, Prithvi will insist on feeding Samar.

She's wondering what exactly she should tell Rithik when Samar walks into the room, dressed in a simple worn grey tshirt and jeans. He holds her eyes for a long moment, expression hopeful. She remembers him calling her Amu.

She remembers Indu's phone call.

Amrita turns back to the diary. "So, I can pencil your visit to Titan at 9 a.m. We can move the meeting with Mr. Bajaj to 11 a.m. And then you have another meeting with the leader of the student wing of our party, Shweta Kulkarni, at 12:30 p.m. Then, you have the party meeting at 3 p.m."

Samar's head snaps up. "Bhaiya, please don't move any meetings because of me. I'm going to be here for a couple more days, we can go later."

Amrita almost shakes her head. Little brothers and their incessant need to make sure that their elder siblings know just how uncool it is to hangout with elder siblings.

Amrita wishes she could have brought her earphones and it would have been socially acceptable to work in a group while wearing her earphones. She does not wish to be a part of this conversation and neither does she need any information from this conversation.

Prithvi shakes his head. "We're going. That's it. If I can't make time for my little brother, what kind of an elder brother am I, huh? And you're already planning on leaving. Let me have some time with you."

It's the emotional blackmail card that has Amrita standing up. All eyes snap to her for a moment and she gives a half smile to no one in particular, picking up her diary as she goes. "I'll reset the meeting."

She moves to the backyard to call Rithik, who, thankfully agrees to postpone the meeting after a quick word with his boss, since Mr. Bajaj has the hour at 11 a.m. free already. Bless her luck.

It's when Rithik passes the phone to Mr. Bajaj that Amrita considers that she may just have jinxed her own luck.

Instead of the self righteous anger that Amrita is expecting, Mr. Bajaj chuckles as he says,"Prithvi babu only just checked his schedule, didn't he?"

"Yes, sir," she says, embarrassed and sheepish because of Prithvi. They'd gone over his schedule on the previous day too. If he'd just told her— at least they'd have been professional and Mr. Bajaj would have a 24 hours notice.

"I wonder how you manage to work with him," he laughs,"Prithvi babu has always been impulsive. But do not worry, Ms. Arya, I will fully accommodate you and him."

Amrita squashes the urge to sigh. "Thank you, Mr. Bajaj. We will see you in your office at 11 a.m. tomorrow."

"Of course. Thank you, Ms. Arya."

"And thank you, sir, for being so accommodating. I hope you have a good day."

This time, Amrita actually finds herself wishing her pleasantaries to be true. Any man who is this calm about a sudden change in time needs to have good days. If it were anyone else, Amrita would have been humiliated and Prithvi would have lost favour.

When she turns to go back, Samar is standing at the door, hand raised to knock. Amrita startles, putting a hand on her heart. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't see you there."

Samar frowns minutely and shakes his head, as if dismissing a thought. "No, I'm sorry for startling you. Um, anyway, Maa sent me to ask you if you'd like some tea."

Amrita shakes her head, pressing her lips in a quick smile. "No, thank you."

"Right, I'll tell her to make a couple of parathas for you." He turns to leave, an unbearably smug tilt to his lips.

"I already spent my lunch," she calls out after him, deliberately not using his name. "Thank you for the offer, however."

Samar turns back to her. "You're telling me you had the time to go to Dev's college, eat icecream with him, drop him back home, come here and eat lunch too?"

"Being oversmart is not a virtue." Is all she says, pursing her lips in irritation.

He sighs and slaps a hand to his mouth and takes a moment to compose himself before speaking again. "I'm sorry, I won't press you. But, Amu, can we please have that conversation tonight?"

Amrita shakes her head before he even finishes the question. "Tomorrow," she tells him, because she is a coward, who knows that Indu has planned to propose to him and Amrita doesn't want to forgive him only to face heartbreak. Again.

He frowns, looking like he would have some words but stops himself again. "Thank you," he says quietly.

Amrita nods at him awkwardly. "I'll make an appointment for the showroom for tomorrow."

"Yes, of course." He keeps staring at her, and for a moment, Amrita thinks he will walk forward and again—

He doesn't.

He clears his throat, his ears turning red as he turns away instantly and leaves.

Amrita doesn't realise she's smiling until she looks at the black screen of her phone.

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Fifteen minutes later, Smita, the house help, comes to her with a paratha.

Stubborn bastard, Amrita thinks with a sigh even as she begins to dig in.

He eyes her from the other end of the table, she can feel his eyes burning on the side of her face. The tiny smile she spies on his face when she takes a bite is just as endearing as it used to be all those years ago.

She looks back to her diary when she remembers again what Indu had begged her to help with.

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There's something about seeing his shades on Amrita's face.

When Samar actually sees the news, he has started it with the intention to watch the whole speech and then mock his brother for his incantation and speech pattern. However, when his eyes fall on a figure in the far back, on a figure clad in blue instead of the bleak white of everyone around her, his breath hitches.

He can't see much of her expressions since but he knows (knew, his mind corrects and he winces) she doesn't enjoy loud noises and crowds. The shades on her face prove his memory to be correct even in the present. Amrita never wears shades unless she has a headache.

He wishes he could give her those chocolates she loved, they always lifted her spirits up.

When he squints, he sees the shape of the glasses and it rings a bell in his mind until it bangs and he remembers— those are his shades. He left him in the car today, when he went out with Prithvi bhaiya.

The urge to be there next to her, to hold her hand, to cup her cheeks, it all comes back. He wants to hold her hand and lead her away from the public and run his fingers through her hair and let her settle until her headache is gone.

He was a coward, all those years ago.

He can't be one now.

He only wishes that Amrita will hear him out.

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Tagging: @akshinayak