#rahhh fight club

[sniigura-archive]

Adam x Reader x Mammon AU anon again.

You: You should be writing fic instead of me anon!

Also You: *Expands upon my idea in ways I didn't think of and once again proving to me you're an amazing writer <3*

READER GETTING PREGNANT TERTGDFTHYFGTHFV YESSSSS

I feel like Reader would refuse to find out who the father is cuz she KNOWS it would be a shitshow with these two either way (one claiming "ownership" of her and the kid and the other making her life miserable because of it), so as such Adam and Mammon are both the Dad That Stepped Up(tm).

They def fight over whether or not Reader should get an abortion early on (neither of them believe in women having agency over their bodies *sobs*). Adam's so offended cuz he doesn't believe in abortion and is like "how could you suggest murdering my baby????" and Mammon's like "it's a clump of cells and I can't have a pregnant bitch riding a pole" he needs Reader back to work asap. Reader decides on her own to keep it ONLY if they promise to not make her life hell for it (or else bye bye snu snu). Mammon begrudgingly gives her paid leave and Adam begrudgingly accepts that Reader is keeping her job.

When the baby comes the men def both spoil the shit out of them. Adam happily offers to babysit/help out with anything no questions asked, Mammon gives Reader all the money she needs and more for the baby and buying the kid all the best toys and clothes. Reader has the main authority on how the kid will be raised (she does not want her kid to end up like either of them lmao) and the boys just gotta accept it like Yes Ma'am.

WAHHH THANK UU but if you ever need help to like brain storm stuff for a fanfic im your man my dms are always open for that i love going through ideas so much RAHHH

mammon: i can’t have a pregnant bitch riding the pole

adam: why not? pregnant bitches are hot as fuck

reader fighting off pregnancy nausea: can you both leave now pls

reader is so done with these sexists guys 😭 she’s aware that technically she doesn’t need them and she can just leave for another city. she has made enough good financial decisions to make her be able to live a comfortable life with her child with no problems

reader says neither of them will be the father and then they’re like „who else were you fucking 🤨🤨🤨“ NO ONE YOURE JUSZ ANNOYING!!!! reader is lucky the baby is her carbon copy other wise both of them would throw hands with each other

adam probably says it’s his since she has been with mammon for longer and all it takes is one night with him to get knocked up because he’s just that good

i think it’d be interesting once reader is too far along to continue working at the club if that’s when glitz and glam make an appearance. they really want to steal that spot of being favourites with all the benefits. they’re very willing to fill in all the spots. mammon considers it for a hot sec but then he visits reader and is pissed the fuck off that he actually genuinely likes reader. the realisation hits him like a truck

adam and mammon refuse to acknowledge that they’re basically in a poly relationship now with you. they get along surprisingly well as long as the topic isn’t you and the baby. as soon as it’s about you and the baby they remember they are Sworn Enemies

but it also gets very annoying for reader when they agree on something because they’re soo stubborn 😭 poor woman. should have moved away lmaoo

THEM AS DADS!!! precious as fuck. imagine if it’s a girl shishsjs girl dads…….little girl who looks like reader so she has wrapped them around her finger. who can say no to such a cute face 😔

[honeycrashed]

Kazemaru and Fubuki 🔪👻💤. Enjooooy! (no pressure!)

FINALLY POSTING THIS RAHHH I really had to draw one of the asks

🔪 A headcanon relating to fighting/violence

Kazemaru:

Kazemaru usually isn’t the type to get into serious fights, unless you start provoking him about questioning their club’s skills, then maybe you’ll get a bit of a rise out of him. He doesn’t care much about what people have to say about him, so long as you don’t undermine his or his club’s skill.

He’s an instigator for petty squabbles in the clubroom though, handling bets on who would win. Keeps a tally for “Days without stupid arguments” in the clubroom.

(He was let go when he fell asleep)

(Someoka once tried to just put him on top of the closet and then he proceeded to jump Someoka.)

Fubuki: //actual violence skip to the GO Fubuki part if you're sensitive to that!

Instigating Fubuki will lead to Shirou doubting himself silently depending on who it is. He has to hold Atsuya back from harming the person, But they can’t always hold themselves back. This will lead to situations where Shirou’s just silently trying to stop Atsuya from doing it while the person mocks him more, leading to Shirou doubting himself more and Atsuya getting even more upset. And their body feels cold but there’s a warm burning pain in their chest and maybe tears are about to come out, and maybe they’ve already landed a hit or more, and maybe they’re being dragged away, and maybe it hurts to breathe from that kick to the ribs, It's hard to differentiate when it feels like their brain is being disorganized.

//The audio in the bg while I write about Fubuki getting kicked in the ribs:

GO Fubuki is more inclined into getting into fights.

Petty fights with Atsuya usually go like this,

Atsuya: I’ll be in charge of this one since I’m taller.

Shirou: We are the same height? (Shirou lets him do it anyways)

👻 A headcanon about what scares them

Kazemaru:

Losing himself to the want for power again. Sometimes when he watches over his friends' smiles, He thinks of that day he gave in to the aliea meteorite's powers. The day he lost himself, along with his team. He's wracked up guilt over it and he knows that they've put it in the past by now, But he can't help but beat himself up over it. His hand still stings as a memory of that day.

(skip this part if u have an issue with like. bug/worm mentions. just skip to Fubuki then.)

Worm. he just do not like them they make him cringe thinking about worms on his skin ewww yucky

Fubuki:

if I get personal this means acknowledging my fears that hit too close. I'm not doing that! not today !!!

Shirou has an interest in unnerving things, playing lots of horror games and being an avid fan of horror media in general. Atsuya isn't as good at stomaching such things, But he insists that he can. He can't, and Shirou notices this, so when Shirou can tell Atsuya needs a break, he goes off and does something else for them.

💤 A headcanon about their sleep

(THIS IS AN EXCUSE TO ALL STARS ALL OVER THE PLACEEE)(I GOT DERAILED WHILE TALKING TO MY FRIEND ABOUT HCS. SO. THIS WILL BE LONG…and. Some of these might be unrelated. oops.)

Kazemaru:

Sleeps on his side. Argues with his life that it’s the best position to sleep in. (Kidou would argue otherwise, finding that sleeping like you’ve been put in the coffin is much better.)

Kazemaru argues with Kidou that side sleeping is much better and Kidou just offhandedly goes "Not for your uneven ahh face from the center of gravity pulling onto your face while you lie down like that for hours"

"let's not talk abt faces here mr marks on my face from wearing my goggles all the damn time" Kazemaru would shoot back.

And then they laugh at each other and hug, then Kidou goes “Obviously sleeping on one’s back is better though.” And then they get launched into a 2hr debate.

Stopped by Endou mentioning that he just sleeps on his stomach which is the WORST for anyone's back. ever. especially with all those hits he takes from those soccerballs.

(Gouenji silently overthinks which position really is the best to optimize.)

Fubuki:

When he does fall asleep on his bed, They prefer having a plushie to hug. If he's in Hokkaido, they prefer to have a cozy soft blanket.

If he's staying over at Inazuma City, (Kidou’s house bc there are probably sooo many guest rooms..) He likes having the air conditioner on high, Kidou swears it was like a barren frozen wasteland when he opened the door to Fubuki’s room.

Caffeine makes him sleepy! He doesn't remember this all the time though, leading to “oh.shit.shit.shit.shit.” moments when he drinks coffee while pulling an all-nighter to cram a project and realize exactly what he'd done. He likes the taste of the coffee though, that’s what he drinks it for. He only avoids it when they’re sleepy, at least try to.

One late night hanging out with each other, Kazemaru mentions how he once spotted Kidou just pour the beans into the cup and then chug it. Atsuya wants to try it once, but Shirou constantly tries to stop him.

Atsuya’s usually the one who’s fronting when they wake up, finding himself wherever Shirou passed out last. This time was the washing machine! He was taking out the laundry! Atsuya tries to get them to a bed before their body passes out.

Heavy sleepers, once he falls asleep there’s no chance of waking him back up.

Always looks like he’s about to fall asleep.

[wearethekingdom]

I think it's really funny people who hate fight club don't know that it was a book first and so with their lack of media literacy and just lack of translating any metaphor ever, they hate it.

Like how smart do you have to be to understand this movie? Because damn I didn't think this many people were thick skulled enough to just see it as "RAHHH BOYS OVER GIRLS!!! I HATE WOMEN RAHHHHH!!!"

But hey maybe that's a good thing they hate it so openly and in such an ignorant way because then I know who to avoid

[kailaxd]

I LOVE FIGHT CLUB I LOVE FIGHT CLUB RAHHH MY FAV GAY ROMCOM

first time posting an edit here

[thebladeblaster]

Digimon Tamer ZERO (ver.2) Chapter 1 The Digimon Phenomenon (part 3)

Misaki lowered her book for a second as she heard their conversation.

“Considering its attitude The Blaster probably spoiled it. Wait...Knight...Blaster...affection...”, Izaki suddenly gasped as he realized something.

Miwa nodded and then put his pointer finger over his mouth.

“What’s with you two?”, Morikawa questioned obliviously.

“It’s nothing.”, Miwa replied with a coy smile.

At Aichi’s house...

Aichi had just put on his white jacket from before and prepared to leave.

“Hopefully, I can find something this time...”, Aichi thought.

His V pet suddenly beeped as a strange circular symbol appeared on his V pet screen.

“The digital world needs your help please answer our call!”, A feminine voice came from the V pet.

“What’s this some sort of event?”, Aichi questioned.

“After the defeat of Lucemon many years ago the other demon lords returned and took over the digital world. There is not many tamers strong enough to face them. So, we urgently ask for you to receive our call.”, the voice continued as yes and no options showed up on his V pet.

“I have time. Okay, I’ll see what this is about real quick.”, Aichi said before clicking yes.

“Take the 5:45 Shibuya bound train from Jiyuugaoka Station.”, was displayed on his v-pet in text.

“Jiyuugaoka Station? Why does it want me to go there?”, Aichi questioned.

Aichi looked briefly at the block. He had about 20 minutes to get there. He looked down at the v-pet still confused. He could just ignore it but...he didn’t know what but had this strange feeling...like he really should go. Aichi sighed not knowing exactly why he headed there despite having much more pressing matters like a planet destroying alien demon thing within him.

“Bye Mom.”, Aichi waved goodbye to his mother before he left through the front door.

“Don’t stay out too long, sweetie.”, his mom replied waving goodbye.

Aichi continued to the destination first walking. He didn’t understand why but he felt his heart beating against his chest increasingly rapidly as he started walking faster. Aichi sweated nervously as he continued to speed up.

“What’s with this feeling?! It’s just like the feeling I had not long before everything with Link Joker started.”, Aichi thought, hardly noticing he was now sprinting.

Aichi noticed this sweat dropping as he passed a car in speed. Aichi promptly slowed down hoping no one noticed that.

“Wow, that was really bad man. If your trying to hide what’s wrong with you you’re failing miserably.”, Imaginary Plane Dragon said in a mocking tone.

“Darn it! Darn it! Darn it! I keep forgetting about Link Joker’s extends beyond cardfights!”, Aichi thought, panicking and mentally hitting himself.

He did not know the extent to this thing’s power. He mentally sighed having a brief flashback. He was in the Cardfight club room with Misaki, Naoki, and Shingo. A cardfight had briefly finished and he had a panicked expression. The others looked at him in confusion. He shook his head waving away the memory.

He came to a stop as he heard...a explosion?! Aichi was beyond confused looking over to the station. He gawked as from out the smoke emerged a large blue t-rex-like dinosaur. It had some sort of organic armor over its head with horns. It had black stripes along its body and yellow eyes. Countless people ran for their lives fleeing from the debris.

Aichi rubbed his making sure this was not some sort of illusion.

“Holy crap!!! There’s a real life kaiju attacking Japan!!!”, Aichi thought.

“What the heck!!! How did these guys show up on Earth so easily?!?! We needed a real convoluted plan pull that off! And this stupid dumb dino did it easily!! Mind asking him his secret?”, Imaginary Plane Dragon said as Aichi sweat dropped shaking his head no.

“Now that I think about it that dinosaur looks like Greymon but blue. But Digimon can’t be real right?”, Aichi thought.

“You thought the same thing about Cray too.”, Imaginary Plane Dragon replied sarcastically.

“Well...I...”, Aichi trailed off knowing he had a point.

Aichi flinched as the BlackGreymon turned to him.

“Nova Blast!”, BlackGreymon called out as it shot a large blue flame ball from its mouth in his direction.

“Run stupid! We can’t destroy the universe if you die!”, Imaginary Plane Dragon said.

“I’m not doing that!!!”, Aichi thought as he ran from the fiery blast.

He suddenly heard BlackGreymon let out a pained cry before he turned around. He gasped in shock seeing the fiery blast had been cut in two and BlackGreymon had crashed against the station as if it was hit by something. It grunted as it started to get up looking for whatever struck it. That’s when Aichi looked down to see another Digimon which was much smaller than BlackGreymon. It was light purple reptilian Digimon wearing kendo gear and holding a wooden sword. The gear covered most of its body besides it’s legs. You couldn’t even see it’s face, only glowing gold orbs which were likely it’s eyes.

“It’s a Kotemon. Just like...there’s no way.”, Aichi thought.

“Rahhh! How did a weak little Digimon like you knock me down?”, BlackGreymon questioned getting back up on its feet.

“Heh, your not strong. All you have is unnecessary size that slows you down. It’s no wonder when your species becomes mega if drops most of its size.”, the Kotemon replied snarkily.

Aichi tilted his head seeming to recognize Kotemon’s noticeable attitude. BlackGreymon growled at Kotemon in fury.

“We’ll see about that before I turn you into a greasy smear!!!”, BlackGreymon growled as it charged at Kotemon.

Aichi gasped as BlackGreymon approached and Kotemon entered a kendo stance. Aichi from behind Kotemon noticed near BlackGreymon’s stomach it had been damaged by the rubble.

“To bring it down Kotemon needs to strike there.”, Aichi thought, not noticing his v-pet glowing.

Kotemon focused on that spot and started running towards BlackGreymon. It raised its wooden sword and struck BlackGreymon in the weak point Aichi saw. Aichi gasped in surprise wondering if Kotemon saw that weak spot too. BlackGreymon gasped clutching its stomach growling. It opened its mouth and prepared another blast.

“Kotemon move!”, Aichi shouted out.

“He’s about to shoot another Nova Blast!”, Aichi thought worriedly as v-pet glowed again.

Kotemon just barely dodged the Mega Flame which burned off some of Kotemon’s kendo gear. Kotemon had jumped back over closer to where he was. The top parts of its kendo gear had been destroyed revealing half of its face, the top of its arm, and its upper right body. He saw it was indeed reptilian like he expected. It had two horns on it’s head and golden eyes. It’s underbelly and the its jaw was black. It seemed to have some strange golden markings on its face, arm, and torso.

“Your not getting any closer BlackGreymon.”, Kotemon said.

“I won’t let some rookie stop me from fulfilling my mission!”, BlackGreymon roared.

“Mission?”, Aichi questioned.

“You won’t live long enough to find out human!”, BlackGreymon said as it fired out another fiery blast.

Kotemon swiped the blast in half when it approached him.

“Grr! Why are you even protecting this little human?!”, BlackGreymon questioned.

Aichi looked at Kotemon curiously who faced BlackGreymon.

“He’s my tamer obviously.”, Kotemon replied.

“Tamer? Me? Wait that means...”, Aichi trailed off looking at his v-pet seeing a sprite of Kotemon fighting BlackGreymon.

Aichi gasped in surprise seeing the fight before him was playing out on his v-pet.

“Then did you really hear what I was thinking?”, Aichi questioned.

“Right. I heard your commands loud and clear through the v-pet.”, Kotemon replied as Aichi sweat dropped.

“He didn’t hear Link Joker did he? I hope not.”, Aichi thought nervously.

“I don’t know what your planning, but I won’t let you go around terrorizing my world!”, Aichi said facing BlackGreymon.

Aichi looked at his v-pet noticing the strange symbol had reappeared. Aichi’s eyes briefly glowed with a rainbow spiral and a light blue aura appeared around him. They all looked surprised as Aichi’s v-pet let out a bright light. The light enveloped Kotemon.

“Kotemon digivolve to DrakeGladimon!!!”

Out from the light appeared a slightly taller figure clad in knight armor. Unlike normal Gladimon it’s body shape was more similar to Knightmon but not as tall. It had a brown vest with brown straps. It’s legs were dragon-like and clad in armor like the rest of its body. It’s boots and gauntlets had claws. It’s helmet was stylized like a wyvern with horns and it’s eyes were red. It’s helmet had the orange fur at the end like normal Gladimon. It now had two real metal broadswords with a golden handle. A light purple tail stuck out from its armor having bits of armor on it as well.

Aichi’s v-pet had changed as well now being a small light blue device with blue buttons and a grey antenna. It had strange markings on it.

“What?! How did he suddenly digivolve like that? Digivolution should take years?!”, BlackGreymon questioned.

“Let’s go! DrakeGladimon!”, Aichi said and DrakeGladimon nodded.

“Yes master! Whirlwind Wheel Rush!”, DrakeGladimon replied.

DrakeGladimon spun itself like a tornado striking BlackGreymon. BlackGreymon gasped in pain as in was struck by DrakeGladimon’s dual blades. Aichi v-pet had a voice come from it again.

“You must now purify it.”, the voice ordered.

“How do I do that?”, Aichi asked.

“Aim your former v-pet towards the fallen Digimon.”, she ordered.

Aichi did just that and a light shot out of the once v-pet enveloping BlackGreymon. When it cleared some dark energy came out of it which disappeared. It then instantly began to shrink into a much smaller orange dinosaur and green eyes. It had became Agumon.

“Woah, what happened? What’s this place?”, Agumon questioned, looking around confused.

“Uhh...this is Earth.”, Aichi said as he approached Agumon before DrakeGladimon quickly grabbed Aichi out of the way of a massive figure which suddenly appeared behind Agumon.

“Agumon!”, Aichi called out, paling as a massive foot squashed the rookie Digimon.

Agumon dispersed into pixels which was absorbed by the massive figure. The figure was very buff and green. It had skull-like armor and a massive bone sword. It had red markings and white hair.

“Stupid weakling. He couldn’t even do his job right. You’ve been relieved from your position in the Ebony Squadron, BlackGreymon.” , the big Digimon said.

The massive Digimon held a grey train with yellow horns. It had a single green eyes and was very roughed up. That train wasn’t just a train it was a Trailmon! It threw the injured Trailmon directly at them. It laughed after the Trailmon impacted causing dust to fly everywhere and the ground to tremble.

It stopped laughing as it flinched. It felt a extremely dark malevolent presence. It looked around for where the presence was coming from.

“Is one of the demon lords here!?!?”, the skull armored Digimon questioned.

“You!”, the skull armored Digimon looked over to the source of the voice.

As the smoke cleared the skull armored Digimon could see glowing red eyes. It gawked as it saw that the Trailmon never hit the ground. It was being held by a Digimon. The Digimon was knight clad in dragon-like armor which resembled Knightmon. It’s helmet had horns and it had red eyes. It had a visible tail with pieces of armor and metal spikes down it. It had purple wings and legs like DrakeGladimon. It had spikes on its shoulder armor and bits of gold on its armor. It had a massive shield and great sword strapped to its back.

“WyvernKnightmon, it’s a extremely rare species of Knightmon. This should be fun.”, the skull Digimon said.

Next to WyvernKnightmon was Aichi a faint red and black aura appeared around him briefly.

“I can’t believe you killed your own comrade!”, Aichi said as he glared at the skull armored Digimon.

“Comrade or not that is the law of monsters. The weak must die.”, the skull armored Digimon said.

Aichi clutched his chest trying to contain Link Joker within him.

“I have to calm down this anger isn’t like me but...”, Aichi thought, remembering Agumon being squashed.

It didn’t even know what it was doing it must have been controlled by something. The idea of a innocent little creature being controlled like that and killed. It was beyond horrible. It was the kind of thing that definitely sadden him, but he didn’t get angry often at all. However, he could feel Link Joker’s presence getting more powerful twisting the sadness he felt into rage.

“Take him down, WyvernKnightmon. Aim for unarmored his chest.”, Aichi thought pointing the former v-pet to WyvernKnightmon.

“Berserk Tempest Sword!”, WyvernKnightmon called out as it flew at the skull armored Digimon.

It raised its own massive blade to block WyvernKnightmon much to its shock its own blade shattered upon impact with WyvernKnightmon’s.

“That’s impossible!!!”, the skull armored Digimon said as it was sent flying back into the abandoned station.

Aichi got onto WyvernKnightmon’s back and flew into the abandoned station. In the station more Digimon were inside most of them were champion and ultimate. They blasted WyvernKnightmon with there attacks but WyvernKnightmon created a barrier of wind blowing their attacks back. He charged at the skull armored Digimon and delivered another fierce slash with its sword at it chest.

“Damn. It’s just a ultimate Digimon. How is it this strong?”, the skull armored Digimon questioned.

A green goblin Digimon ran over to it. It had white hair and blue eyes. It held a club and wore black loincloth.

“Commander Titamon!”, the club wielding Digimon called out.

Titamon struggled up looking over to the approaching Digimon. As soon as it came near it grabbed its head and crushed it. It dispersed into particles that were absorbed by Titamon. Titamon now seemed to be a bit healed from fighting WyvernKnightmon. The other Digimon flinched as Titamon looked over to them.

“Give me your commander your power you pathetic weaklings! Soul Core Attack!”, Titamon commanded slashing its own troops with its blade and absorbing their data.

“Stop it! Now!”, Aichi said as he rode towards Titamon on WyvernKnightmon.

WyvernKnightmon slashed at Titamon who blocked with its newly restored blade. It was pushed back into the railway tunnel. However this time it’s blade wasn’t broken. Aichi looked rather confused as they went down the railway tunnel and the area around them completely changed. He could see a unfamiliar forest nearby a station with a strange track. White almost ghost shaped Digimon flew by. As they passed through WyvernKnightmon glowed again changing its appearance once again.

“WyvernKnightmon digivolve to Dynasmon!”

It’s blade disappeared and Titamon laughed cockily as it slashed at Dynasmon. Dynasmon threw a punch that completely shattered it’s sword and as it hit its face completely shattered its skull helmet. Titamon crashed into the forest below and the flying Digimon dispersed to avoid getting hit.

Aichi blinked completely stunned after regaining control.

“Oh crap, where am I?”, Aichi questioned.

“You are in the digital world, my lord the Blaster.”, Dynasmon replied and Aichi let out a sheepish chuckle.

“My real name is Sendou Aichi and you don’t have to call me lord. You can just call me Aichi.”, Aichi replied.

“Great, because you cried over a baby dinosaur we have been isekaied.”, Imaginary Plane Dragon said.

Aichi pinched himself to make sure this hadn’t all been some sort of bizarre dream.

Chapter 1 end