#quinn has a cousin who had a full-blown crisis after his first job and babusia was like. have you considered being a wilderness educator <3< /div>
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darkfinch · 2 years ago
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if you wish, and I am bracing already for what this might bring, tell us about rabbit as a child? (otherwise or as a palate cleanser, enquiring brits want to know how he takes his tea)
ALWAYS happy to talk about the beloved unhinged uncle <3
i’m glad you’re bracing! We’ll start here: one of Babusia’s friends kills an asshole for work, kills his mistress (who did NOT show up in the halfhearted recon and was NOT supposed to be there and WAS a surprise witness), and then finds a kid hiding under the bed while he's cleaning up.
a hundred and fifty utterances of the word "fuck" later, the kid’s dropped off very apologetically at Known Kid-Haver Babusia’s house. He doesn’t talk for a few months, but he Does eat his weight in soup, which is very encouraging. This is Rabbit, age 7.
he grows up as the youngest in the busiest era of Babusia’s kids (11 in the house at the same time, aaa, aaaaaaa; when he's 13 she takes in a few more, and he stops being the baby. 4 of these kids make it to 40).
he’s very shy and very quiet and is immediately involuntarily taken under the wing of a hot-headed dirty-blonde ten-year-old, who is impulsive and trouble-seeking and smug (and who, much later, has a :3-faced ringlet-ed gremlin baby). She beats people up for him. They're sparring partners. They do forbidden secret baby crime together (get infinite candy with this one simple hack: corner store thievery).
baby rabbit: is reigning hide-and-seek champion, is world’s tiniest survival-skills expert, is at his most confident when he’s telling you which plants would kill you if you ate them. Is a cat whisperer. Can mimic bird noises with terrifying accuracy. Is determined to be good enough to be Good Enough.
it’s widely known among the babusia kids that the first time you kill someone is half-test half-right of passage. It’s like, yeah, okay, Baba's decided you're ready to try this for Real (with a chaperone)—but also, some people are wired to be able to do this, and some just aren’t.
Quinn, for example, watches a couple of older kids come home throwing up and having night terrors about it, and then is himself completely fine. Quinn gets celebratory pie.
Rabbit, who knows Babusia tends to encourage the panickers into non-hitter lines of work—and who Knows she knows about how she got him, that she's maybe Expecting something from him—sneaks out to have his crisis in the privacy of the shed.
so: rabbit gets his pie, and gets a mentor, and gets to work, and he should probably not have done this, and like 12 years later he'll have a massive breakdown and build a cabin for himself in the middle of nowhere and be very normal about it :)
[quinn got his Tea Preferences from watching uncle rabbit with stars in his eyes, only quinn has like. tastebuds. restraint. the will to live. so imagine someone who uses three times the amount of leaves necessary and then steeps it until it's legally considered a health hazard, and then occasionally adds jam 4 flavour. that's rabbit. babusia shaking her head mournfully in the bg)
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