#quest took me 25 minutes and at least 10 minutes was spent running around collecting spiribirds cuz i was terrified

[ladymariayuri]

to da mutuals that played world and/or the older games; was high rank rajang always like........ a sad sedated gorilla compared to the master rank version. ive been pussying around doing the rajang quest til now and it was a literal joke compared to kirin methhead zoomies omega terrorist grab-you-off-my-arm-and-throw-you-into-a-wall iceborne regular rajang

[breegullbeakreviews]

NOTICE: I’m a 64-bit backer of this game. That means I put over $500 (approximately $535) into this game on Kick-starter. That being said I’m not going to cut this game any slack.

Summary: When Capital B steals all the worlds’ books, Yooka and Laylee set out on a quest to stop the corporate creep and get their book back in a collect-a-thon adventure straight out of the 90s.

Overall: For better and for worse Yooka-Laylee is a game out of the 90s. I’m a fan of a lot of what this game is inspired by, but when this game fails it does so to such a degree that it makes me angrier than I’ve been in a very long time. If it’s on sale or available on Games with Gold or Play Station Plus I’d say it’s worth a shot, but as the reviews paint, this game is the definition of a mixed bag.

Gameplay: Yooka-Laylee is essential a Banjo Tooie sequel. You know the one people complained Nuts & Bolts wasn’t. Yooka the Chameleon and Laylee the Bat are an animal duo that can fly, shoot projectiles, and do a few other unique new maneuvers I won’t spoil here. You collect Pagies to open new worlds and expand them and Quils to pay Trowzer to teach you new moves. There are 20 Pagies in the hub and 25 in each world while there are a mere 10 Quils in the hub and 200 in each world. A Mollycoolin each level will allow you to transform with the help of formerly evil scientist Dr. Puzz. There are 5 Ghost Writers in each world and collecting all of them nets you a Pagie. There are Quiz shows.

Everything I’ve listed off is a classic Banjo game staple, but most of them are either done mediocrely, or just badly. The first one you’ll likely see messed up is the transformations. In Kazooie and Tooie these tied into one or two of a levels ten Jiggies. Here they tend to tie into just one of twenty-five. The last two levels are the biggest exceptions to this rule, but compared to the source material, these transformations feel like they’re here out of tradition as opposed to necessity.

Ghost Writers are next on the list of classic elements muddied up. Each of the 5 little guys has a different method of catching them. One stands still, one runs around a set area, one fights you, one needs to be fed with a projectile, and one is invisible. 3 of these aren’t terrible. Guess which two are terrible? The little red fucker who attacks you is always placed on a small platform that’s about the size of his lunge attack that you need to dodge before he is vulnerable to a hit. I never once found the invisible blue ghost on my own. I looked up every single one of them.

The Quiz shows are also pretty badly botched. Instead of one final quiz before the boss fight at the games end, you get three super small quiz shows. You need to cross ten spaces with three lives by answering questions. No challenge spaces, thank god for that in this game, but also no musical questions. The one interesting mechanic here is that if you answer the question in the first two seconds you get to move two spaces instead of one. The part where things go south though is in the questions themselves, and it’s caused by the fact that the first quiz comes in so quickly after the game starts: some questions are based on player stats and choices. How long have you been playing? What was the first ghost writer you collected? How many Quils do you have? These end up being the questions you get most of the time as there just isn’t a wide enough variety of characters and settings to draw creative quiz questions from.

This last blunder I guess is more of a preference thing, but I never liked buying moves in Tooie, and that’s what you do here. Trowzer gives you moves free in the hub, but inside the five worlds he charges you. It doesn’t even force Yooka and Laylee to find Trowzer in a certain area for a certain move. He sells all the worlds moves from one easily accessed spot towards the start of the world. Heck I think the most effort you need to put in to find the guy is in the first world.

This last issue is kind of a big one, and part of it again depends on preference, but it’s a new mechanic to an extent as well: Expanding worlds is a terrible idea. Banjo Tooie was cool for a play through when it was big, but even with warps it feels tedious and empty years later, at least to me. Nuts & Bolts was a result of an attempt to fix the issue by making getting around the massive world as fun as what you do once you get there, and that worked, but I’m getting off topic. Yooka Laylee’s expandable worlds are always either too empty to start with, or get to big when expanded. I’ll hit on each level more specifically when I get to each, but let’s just say this game struggles to find that happy medium.

Also again opinion, but this game has back-tracking to previously visited worlds. Something my 3D platforming preference Banjo Kazooie almost entirely lacked. Some people like it, others don’t. For me it’s certainly not a good mark on this game, but probably an necessity due to the games size.

Mini-games: They all suck. All of them. If Yooka-Laylee had no mini-games this game would be so much better than it is. I guess here it’s also important to note that while I grew up in the 90s with Rare game, I only grew up with their 3D platformers on the N64, so Banjo-Kazooie, Tooie, and DK64.

I never owned a Super Nintendo and I’ve never played a Donkey Kong Country game long enough to get behind the wheels of a mine cart. That being said Kartos is a relic I have no nostalgia for. Kartos generates out of thin air a series of mine cart tracks floating in the games environment filled with holes and obstacles you need to avoid while collecting enough gems by the end of the course. I don’t find these fun. Not one bit. This is compounded in the fourth world, but I’ll cover that when I get there. What annoys me about the inclusion of this character is it is stretching beyond Banjo to an era I don’t care about, but more importantly its inclusion was a stretch goal. I have very mixed feelings about stretch goals, particularly how you usually need to go through a bunch of lesser goals, like this one, before hitting to really good ones, like the day one release on consoles.

Kartos isn’t the worst thing about this game though. Another side character holds that title, and his name is Rextro. Rextro’s inclusion was sadly always a planned part of the game, and he is by far the worst part of that plan. I haven’t heard one person speak positively about them, and that’s for good reason, because there is no positive side to them. They’re relentlessly hard, are home to a host of frame drops and other glitches, and not only do you need to beat them all to get a Pagie, but you then need to beat the high-score for another.

My end game time was just shy of 32 hours, and probably a good 5 or 6 of those hours was spent basing my head against these horrible mini-games. While the mine cart at least becomes somewhat of a mechanic that you learn to use over the course of the game, Rextro’s Arcade never builds on its games, and each arcade game is just as bad if not worse than the one that came before it. If I ever replay this game I’m going out of my way to avoid both of these.

Hivory Towers: Hivory Towers is the games HUB, and it’s got some problems. Most notably is that outside a small number of short cuts you can open up, getting from one end of the map to the other is a chore that can require multiple loading screens. The Pagies scattered about are pretty clever considering you never know if you’ve got the right move for the job.

That being said the place feels over designed. Since most of Banjo’s moves weren’t required to transverse Grunty’s Lair, outside theming changes around level entrances, the lair stayed pretty consistent in design. It was a cave with barren walls and the only thing blocking your way to the next area was a note door. Here progress is blocked by the next move which means to get from one end of the map to the next you need to pull out every move in the book, literally. Not only is this inconvenient to play through, but it leads to ugly areas like around the entrance to Moody March which is covered in grapple points because that’s the next move you need to progress.

Tribal Tropics: The game’s first level, and the one I’m going to have the most bad memories of. Not that it’s this levels fault. It just happens to be the first level and therefore the one you see all the games problems in first. The annoying ghost writers, the dead ends fixed by world expansion, the under used transformations. They’re all here and they hit hard. Same goes for Kartos and Rextro, but Kartos is actually pretty easy in his first outing.

There are two problems this world has that are all its own though. One is that it is home to the most back tracking in the game. You are unable to complete this level 100% until you’ve gone through over half the game. It’s other problem is part of a joke that culminates in the final world that broke me inside. A Pagie is in a container for no other reason than this joke. You need to talk to it and it’ll open the lid saying it can’t just slide out. I assumed I needed to hit a switch or something so what should have took two minutes took twenty.

There is some good here. Racing against the cloud is fun and the boss fight is interesting. Another cloud can also be used to fill, freeze, or drain the world’s river. Yeah it’s a short list, but it’s not like the first level of Banjo Kazooie or Tooie has a massive highlight reel.

Glitterglaze Glacier: This is the generic snow level, but it’s also the least interesting level in the game due to its attempt to be unique. When you unlock the world you’ve pretty much seen it all as it doesn’t have any dead ends that could be opened up. Instead its expansion opens up the ice palace in the center of the map where the game becomes an isometric platformer.

Let’s tackle the exterior first though. By default this world feels a lot bigger than the previous despite being smaller, but that is a result of a lot of dead space and various levels. Outside the palace there are several other interiors to explore, but all of them turn the game into a linear series of platforms. The transformation for this worlds is only used for one challenge which is the lowest of any of the transformations tied with the next world. There are also several tedious challenges outside involving slippery slopes that are solved with one of the games more interesting new abilities. While these are done better latter, these are handled well for teaching you the basics of these move.

Inside the castle the game turns into an isometric platformer. The labyrinth like design just doesn’t work well here. Finding our way back to a room is annoying, and sadly you’ll be back tracking to rooms quite a bit. The puzzles are all isolated to single rooms, but what you’re supposed to do in each room isn’t always clear or doesn’t always work as intended. For the first time since Ocarina of Time I hit a situation where I was doing the right thing but the game wasn’t detecting it for some reason.

I don’t have negative memories of this world, but it’s certainly in the lower half of the games worlds if I was going to organize them from best to worst.

Moody Marsh: This might be my favorite world in the game. Now negatives wise the world starts out way to small, and once expanded it’s still easy to get lost. The only other issue I had was that some of the challenges don’t set you right back up to try them again, but the general lack of a “retry challenge” button is a more overarching problem for the whole game.

Now for the positives. This world has the best Boss fight in the game. It might be in my top boss fights of all time. It’s not crazy epic, but it’s a mechanically sound fight that never feels cheap. The banter during the fight is fun and it doesn’t out stay its welcome. It’s also designed in such a way that the boss feels massive despite mostly off screen. It’s a boss I’m really sad isn’t repayable without starting a new game because it’s just a really fun boss.

The world also feels the most like a world out of a 90s collect-a-thon. Trees that stretch into the sky and just stop. An endless stretch of water out into a sky box. Even crummy draw distance disguised by darkness. It feels like a modern take on Bubble Gloop Swamp from Banjo Kazooie. Instead of a central hub leading out into clusters of challenges it’s a series of clusters connected by various platforming obstacles that aren’t part of the puzzles.

The world also has the least terrible Rextro Arcade game. It’s not good, but I didn’t loathe its very existence. The mine cart challenge also mixes things up with multiple paths that loop back around which creates a series of back tracking loops you’ll need to hit in order to collect enough gems. The transformation is underused, but it’s still a really cool idea that is sadly limited in use.

Capital Cashino: This world is considered by many to be the worst in the game, but I’m not sure I agree. It is home to my worst memories though. Unlike all of the other worlds, you don’t collect Pagies directly outside of Rextro’s Arcade, Kartos’s challenge, The Boss Fight, the Ghost Writers, and finding all the Quills. Instead you collect Casino chips and exchange them for Pagies. This concept is super interesting despite its sloppy execution. I’d love to see this explored in a sequel with a different theme.

Where the world falls apart is everything else. The challenges are all really weak. The transformation makes no sense here and for some reason it is how you get a massive number of chips. Sadly how you get those chips isn’t explained at all and I discovered how to tackle it by accident. Most of the platforming chips are obtained through a series of random obstacle courses and the rest by playing slot machines that require timing to work out.

What would make this the worst level in the game is Rextro and Kartos. Let’s start with Kartos. I really didn’t like this mine cart course. It’s just not fun at all. It lacks any sense of creativity and is just really difficult. This is also where the world’s boss hides. You fight this world’s boss in a mine cart and it’s the worst boss in the game. It took me over an hour to beat this thig. You jump projectiles and mines and wait for an opening to shot over the course of 3 phases that have nothing in common. It’s just a terrible boss fight all around.

Now for Rextro. This is the worst of his games. It’s the first one I struggled to finish let alone get the high score on. I again spent over an hour on this thing. It’s really bad. This mini-game has frame rate dips like crazy, pointless decorations that block your view of the course, and by its very design you need to play almost perfectly to beat the game at all.

Galleon Galaxy: Much like Moody Marsh, Galleon Galaxy takes after another Banjo Kazooie level, Treasure Trove Cove. Unlike Moody Marsh, its scattered design doesn’t work to its advantage. First off this world starts off insanely small. It starts off consisting of two small islands and a cove. Once expanded the level quadruples in size adding several more islands and a large number of floating space orbs.

The concept of the level is a cross between a pirate theme and space and it’s really cool aesthetically. The level truly feels unique in the genre. The world has the most used transformation in a good way. Not only does it get use across the entire map, but it’s how you’ll face the world’s boss. The game even cleverly gives you a tutorial for the transformation before it lets you out to explore.

That being said the challenges are pretty hit or miss. They are also mostly isolated to their own separate space orbs and usually come down to just platforming. That being said there are some really good challenges here like the robot puzzle. If it weren’t for the isolated aspect of things this might have been the game’s best world.

Final Boss: I want to like this more than I do. It’s a multiphase fight, but it doesn’t feel like it’s fairly designed. Particularly the final phase. Due to the games power bar being vital to most of the moves you’ll need for the final battle, the final phase makes it impossible to have enough time to recharge that bar without taking a hit since you can’t move fast enough to avoid the attacks. The first phase also is designed in such a way that you can get hit by the boss moving to his next location so you need to move into the corner. There are also unskippable mid boss cut scenes.

[lightnovelfreedotcom-blog]

Chapter 10 Light Novel Alter World

The altar melee was a piece of cake. With the regularity of a grinder, my pet kept working on whatever gnolls happened to be around. At a certain point, his health dropped to 90% only to restore gradually back to his signature 100%. The Head Shaman, the local mini boss, cast a bit of rather useless magic, clouding my bear in blue smoke and piercing him with bolts of purple lightning. The fire show came to an abrupt end when Teddy finished with the last defender and turned his attention to the shaman himself. After a dozen hits, another level 17 corpse lay sprawled on the floor. Ding! 15! Six levels in an hour and a half. Awesome. I frisked the corpses piled about and bent over the shaman, curious. A heavy bronze key and a little silver ring. I thought first that it was the quest key which opened one of the cages. It wasn't. Apparently, it opened the squeaky door that led to the dungeon's second level. The ring was a different story. Lore Ring Item Class: Uncommon Durability: 20/20 Effect: +3 to Intellect Nice. I tried it on, and the mana bar jumped up thirty percent. I glanced at the clock. Only three minutes left until the mobs respawned. I gave it some thought and decided to stay for a new mop-up. I had to admit I liked the ring so much I could use another dozen. I jumped up onto the altar and froze in the lotus pose, watching the show. Teddy won again, 9:0. The loot surprised me. No key this time. Either it didn't drop twice or it was rare loot to begin with. In the latter case, the key could be of some value so I could try to get some money back for it. The ring I did get, albeit different. Gold sapphire ring Item class: Common Durability: 20/20 Effect: none. Just a pretty trinket. I raised the ring up to my eyes. Nice one. I threw it into my bag adding it to a handful of other jewelry. I could sell it or give it to the girls I'd met—their numbers steadily growing, luckily for me as I was already itching for it. Especially because most females here looked like Barbies on steroids, covered with token amounts of lace, transparent silk and some jewelry. The sight of slim Elven maidens doing their corpse runs like some bikini beach joggers, was too much for any red-blooded male. Damn those art designers. A plague on both their houses. The sex question was more than resolvable here. You could give in to temptation in your own house or in somebody else's with the hostess' consent. Brothels were another answer to it. All in all, sexual activities in virtual reality were more than popular. Before the arrival of the FIVR, a quarter of all Internet traffic had been porn. Now imagine, instead of two-dimensional pics and dubious-quality videos, the ability to experience a more than real gratification with the most beautiful of all Internet girls. This was one of the cornerstones of the FIVR success. Sex, entertainment and adrenaline, multiplied by one's superiority complex, all in one unique product. Mind boggling. I shouldn't have thought about girls. I shook my head dispersing the unwanted images and had another swig of herbal tea sending my thanks to the Three Little Pigs' innkeeper. Then I turned the key in the heavy carved door. A wide staircase led down, lined with smoky torches. "Hummungus, come, pup. Be quiet." History repeated itself. Here, mobs were juicier, level 18 and above, growing stronger as we approached the third underground floor. After half an hour, I received a new message. Congratulations! You've received Achievement: Immortal. You've stayed alive for ten subsequent levels! Reward: +500 to Fame Fame Alert! Your Fame has exceeded 1000 points! You've reached Fame level 1: "People are talking about you". Friendly faction vendors might surprise you with lower prices. You will also gain access to some secret quests.

Re monster light novel

Not bad at all. My joy was slightly spoiled by the fact that all these achievements were cheats, to a point. Had it not been for my free Teddy ticket, I'd still be a nonentity. I made myself a solemn promise not to think too much of myself and to generally keep a low profile. After a few more minutes, the already level-19 me fought my way to a wide corridor leading to the floor's main hall. There I could fully appreciate the developers' sick sense of humor. The staircase down to the third floor was right opposite the gnolls' barracks. Whether it was AI trying to be funny or this was the basic layout, I didn't know; all I could see was that they were falling in on the drill ground in front of the barracks. A dozen and a half warriors, all my level, plus a level-22 Gnoll Chief and the floor's mini boss, a level 25 Gnoll General. The biggest problem was, they stood shoulder to shoulder. Any party that fought its way down here would have to deal with the entire gang. There simply was no other way. It didn't feel good. Seventeen mobs against a pet, however tough, and I couldn't even interfere for fear of pulling aggro onto myself. My current level was purely nominal: all my skills remained level 5. I was a walking bag with lots of available characteristic points and talents. I still had to get my three talent points from Grym for level 10. And I still had to choose specialization in order to unblock new skill tree branches. My last levels had brought me nine more points which I didn't really want to invest even if I had somewhere in which to invest them. I needed to get a bit of sleep first and think clearly. In other words, my pet was the only real force that counted. I was little more than a walking talking makiwara. I stepped a safe distance back, blessed my pet and, choosing the General as target, pressed 'Attack'. The Gnoll Overseer would be next. I wanted to minimize my pet's exposure to the strongest opponents. Even when still alive, Teddy hadn't been known for good self-preservation skills. He lunged at the opponent with all the enthusiasm of reckless courage. Immediately his life bar began to shrink. It took Hummungus twenty seconds and 15% hits to finally put the General to rest. The Chief took slightly less. And still the gnolls were too many. Way too many. They surrounded Teddy and started pounding his sides and back, nailing him with crits. Soon he had ten opponents and barely half life left. After another minute of melee, the ratio became seven to forty. Three to thirty. Two. One. Done. I breathed a sigh of relief. Good boy! I came over to the bloodied beast and patted his chewed ears. "Way to go, Hummungus. You made your daddy proud." I let Teddy regenerate. We had another three or four minutes before the gnolls respawned. He needed a bit of rest, and it wasn't a problem to mop up the hall again. The mobs would respawn one by one, in the reverse order of their death. Teddy risked virtually nothing against singles. I checked the corpses again collecting the booty. About a gold piece's worth of cash, half a dozen bracelets and a couple Soul Stones. Loot was getting more interesting here, with a variety of steel weapons, armor and chainmail. All had decent defense parameters albeit without any extras. Unfortunately, I had to leave it all lying on the ground: my modest strength didn't allow me to lug around hefty objects. As Murphy's law would have it, I might not be capable of even lifting some of the more promising loot ahead. Talking of the devil. The Gnoll General dropped a sheer treasure: a massive key, a red bracelet of the type I hadn't seen before, and a pair of heavy chainmail gauntlets. I ran a check: Red Bracelet. Serves to identify gnoll elite. Item class: Common Durability: 25/25 Weight: 0.24 lb. Effect: +5 to Armor, +1 to Strength Excellent. I slid the bracelet onto my wrist. If I got another one, I'd wear it on my other arm for some added strength and a bit of armor. Waste not, want not. No point in selling it even, at least until I found an adequate substitute. I weighed the gauntlets in my hand. Chainmail Gauntlets. Crafter unknown. Item Class: Uncommon Durability: 45/45 Weight: 3.3 lb. Effect: +12 to Armor, +3 to Strength Great item. Had to be worth at least ten or twelve gold. In the bag it went. Good job Necros couldn't wear heavy armor, otherwise I'd have to choose whether to sell or keep them. My inner greedy pig stirred happily. Things were looking up. The questions of finding a roof over my head and some daily bread in the shape of a potful of meat and potatoes had ceased to hang over me like some sword of Damocles. Now everything I earned on top I could invest in gear and character growth. Good job, too, considering I'd spent my first day busting my ass, and all I had to show for it had been barely enough for a bed and a meal. "What the &ç@$!" yelled the gnoll who'd respawned first, only an arm's length from me. His heavy saber swooshed over my head. I ducked behind the bear's back just in time. The warrior tried to get to me again. I barely avoided a stab to the face. The pet stepped in and pulled aggro onto himself with a couple of expert hits. Whew. I crawled into a relatively safe corner, waited five seconds and began draining the mob's life. So stupid of me. I'd nearly got myself killed, too busy examining the trophies. By the end of the melee, I calmed down a bit and made a mental note to be more careful in the future. I ended up with level 20 and a lovely pair of hammered steel greaves, with +15 to armor and +4 to strength modifier. Looked like the General only dropped heavy armor. Not my thing. Worth picking up, anyway, even if only to sell it. Pointless hanging about much longer. I still had the dungeon's lower floor to do. Both loot and experience were better there. I allowed the pet a few minutes to regen and walked down the stairs. Here, the rooms didn't resemble dungeons any more. It looked more like a second-rate mansion house. A few bits of furniture stood against the tapestry-lined walls lit by large bowls of burning oil. Who'd have thought the place was that serious. Here, the gnoll warriors were replaced by guards, far more dangerous. Mainly I came across groups of three: two guards plus either a sergeant or a caster. The mobs' levels were predictably higher. The night was going to be anything but relaxed, our little outing quickly turning into an obstacle race. The bear was still capable of handling the trio without much trouble albeit losing one-third life. I really needed to know how to restore his health. Or rather, I was sure that Necros of my level had to have it somewhere but I stuck to my resolution not to fiddle with the stats during the marathon. Really, would I hole up in some dark corner and, brain-dead with fighting, try to solve single-handedly such crucial problems? Not a good idea. A mistake could cost me dearly. So I had to weasel our way out. Bit by bit I managed to use the Deadman's Hand to control one of the guards. In the meantime, Teddy dealt with one or two gnolls depending on how clean the pull was. Then he finished off the one I controlled. A quick meditation, and we moved another hundred feet, heading for the throne hall which housed the juiciest monsters and the sweetest loot. I was also quite worried about the absence of quest keys for the Drow cages. I had to keep going if only to locate the place or the mob who dropped them. In another hour and a half, I did level 24 and received another achievement, for staying alive for fifteen subsequent levels. Another thousand Fame points into the kitty. Then, quite unpredictably, a new message popped up: Congratulations! You've received Achievement: The Untouchable. Your enemies have failed to deal you damage for 5 subsequent levels! Reward: +500 to Fame Apparently, I'd done good. I hadn't made a single mistake. Luck had a lot to do with it, of course. Only they seemed to be sort of generous with their Fame points. If it continued like that, I was going to walk out of the dungeons to a red carpet reception. On we went. Corridors, rooms, halls, gnolls, gnolls and more gnolls. I was already sick to death of their dog chops. Was it my imagination or were they really emitting that canine stench? My eyes ached from the torch flames. Patches of light danced amid shadows and wisps of smoke that clung to the ceiling. My fatigue started to show. I found a safe room, parked Teddy and lay flat for ten minutes or so, relaxing with my eyes shut. Gradually, I felt better. I munched on a totally yummy sandwich washing it down with sweet tea, eternally grateful for the buffs. Teddy refused the food point blank but sniffed the tea with interest. Some funny zombies around... Then I checked my bag to see if I could get rid of a thing or two. The last couple of items had sent me into overload. Seven thousand copper were weighing me down but it would be stupid to leave them, right? Luckily, the third-floor mobs dropped silver. On the bottom of the bag, I discovered a whole mine of Soul Stones. I chose ten or so of the stronger ones and destroyed the rest which gave me a small bag of magic dust—a crafting ingredient meant for alchemists, blacksmiths and the like. That seemed like changing one bunch of trash for another, but it would be a shame to leave it, wouldn't it? By then, the pet had regenerated. I didn't feel that bad, either. Time to go. As it turned out, our safe room was only a few steps away from the throne hall, in some sort of auxiliary corridor. I had a good look around. A long room, brightly lit, with pairs of brutal-looking guards frozen statue-like by the columns that supported the vaulted ceiling. The throne stood against the far wall. On it sat the Gnoll King surrounded by his entourage. They weren't packed too close together. From where I stood I could just about pull two monsters at a time. So we got the show going. Between the two of us, we smoked three pairs of gnolls in less than five minutes. I kept casting Deadman's Hand, controlling one of the guards as Teddy dealt with his partner. My pet killed a mob in thirty seconds, and all that time I kept my target nailed to the ground as it cursed and tried to squirm itself free from the invisible bonds. Then we advanced a little to take over the mopped-up space. One last effort. We only had the King, the Priest and two of the officers left. The officers looked top class. Up to their balls in armor, with double swords on their backs, these level 28 beasts could put up a serious fight. And still I thought they wouldn't be a problem as long as I saved my pet enough life, for we didn't have enough time to meditate. And we still had the dungeon boss to take care of. I started the fight using the same tried and tested scheme by controlling the officer next to me. The mob struggled, helpless, and groaned as he drew his two swords. The second guard swung round and dashed for us. The King and the Priest remained seated, childishly ignoring the danger. This, of course, was only gaming convention. Gnolls' aggro zone didn't exceed seven or eight paces. Once outside it, you could dance and bare your ass in full view of the monster. Having said that, the higher your opponent's level, the more aggressive he became. Some mobs were so amazingly hostile they could sense an enemy miles away, sometimes from the other end of their location. The officers proved stronger than their lower-ranked buddies. They had more life and showered us with hits. Still, the eight-level difference was nothing to sniff at. After another minute plus a bag of nerves and twenty percent off the pet's life, two more corpses were added to the hall's interior design. We took a short break to regen and decide on our tactics. I had no idea about the King's abilities. No good taking the risk pulling aggro onto myself. Should I freeze the Priest so that the pet could attack the King? No good. The Priest was a caster himself. Even tied to a spot, he'd make mincemeat of me. So all I could do, really, was set Teddy on them, then play it by ear. I selected the Priest as target. His being a mage left him with less life. Also, I hoped that I just might disrupt his concentration and stop a couple spells. Just to make life a bit harder for him. Teddy, attack! The moment he crossed the aggro zone's invisible boundary, the King cast some ability that blew away a third of Teddy's life. Immediately, the King started reciting a long spell while the Priest pierced Teddy with a lightning bolt. The pet pounded him back. Twice the Priest failed to cast a new spell until finally he managed to send two curses, one after the other. Then it was my turn to open my eyes wide. The King summoned his pet, a zombie gnoll. Was he a Necro too? Or rather, judging by his heavy armor and the abilities he had, he had to be a Death Knight. I highlighted the zombie. Level 20, too low for a Nec. The King cast another curse and reached for his two-handed sword. For another fifteen seconds the fight could go either way. Then the Priest finally collapsed and we were on the rise. Teddy still had 40% life left when I joined in, casting one Life Absorption after another. Another minute of vigorous fencing, and the hall fell silent. The first couple of guards respawned about a hundred feet away from us. Still, we were relatively safe for a while. The pet needed time to regen, so I was going to do the next round on my own, mopping up the five mobs by the throne. The hall was big and crowded enough for us to pull a guard or two when we needed, as long as we kept an eye on the ticking clock. I crawled out of my corner and, stepping cautiously over the corpses, came up to the pet. He only had about 10% life left and looked it, too. I smoothed out his disheveled fur. "Go take some rest, Ted. Well done." I could use a break, too. My nerves were in shatters. Heaving a sigh of relief, I slumped onto the throne. Comfortable enough. Would be nice to haul it back to my Three Little Pigs room. "Great job, dude," a voice said right over my ear. I jumped. Bug's tiny outline appeared out of thin air. "You asshole!" He gave me a happy grin. "You've nearly scared the pants off me," I continued. 

Dungeon ni deai o motomeru no wa machigatte iru darou ka

"Where've you been, you son of a midget?" Bug sat down comfortably onto the slain King's corpse. "Been to town, sold up, raised sixteen gold, by the way. I can give you half if you want. It's only fair. Thought I'd go back. You think I didn't see you were permanently online? Got some grub on the go in case you're interested." So! The kid was smart, organized and quick to deliver. Cautious, too. And quite prepared to go half in the hope of more profits. Slick operator. "How did you get here through all the doors?" I asked him. Bug produced the bunch of lockpicks and clanged them in the air. "Took me half an hour to open the one on the first floor. The mechanism wasn't too difficult but honestly, I've never really bothered with the skill. The second one I must have gone through right after you. It stood open and all the barracks were empty. But I think I took a wrong turn, so at stealth speed it took me an hour to get out. When I came here you were up to your eyeballs in gnolls. I decided not to distract you." "You did right," I said as I kept replaying one particular thought in my mind. "You can keep the gold. I didn't want it to begin with. I have another offer for you. How would you like to earn a bit of money working as a wardrobe?" "What do you mean?" "Look. I fully intend to stay here for a while. There'll be loads of loot. If you took a dozen pieces of armor and the same in cold steel, that's it, you're in overload. We'll do it differently. We'll put you behind the throne, in this archway here. Then we'll be loading you with everything the gnolls drop. It doesn't matter if you can't move. What's important is that your bag can accommodate anything—this throne if necessary, as long as you don't exceed the 100 slots limit. Is that what your bag is—basic for 100 slots? So we'll stuff it solid. Otherwise, what's the point of going virtual?" The kid still wasn't getting it. Had I overestimated his talents? "And how do you want me to lug this throne back?" "Easy. You'll get a free ride to your spawn point. All you need to do is wait for the mobs to respawn. Then you remove stealth and off home you go. Three hours later, you go to the cemetery to find your grave. It'll be there for a week before it finally decays. In the meantime, you take the items to the store bit by bit. We'll go fifty-fifty, what d'ya think?" Instead of replying, Bug rose and stood in the archway trying to impersonate a wardrobe. He spread his arms wide as if opening the imaginary doors, then opened his mouth—apparently, signifying the top shelf—and mumbled, "All set. Load me up!"