#quest is old man at heart who does not know technology and that is so valid u pop off king one day you'll learn what twitter is

[godsavethecam]

Man, I really have given a Legion character a solid try on this Fallout: New Vegas playthrough, but I may just abandon Caesar at the last second.

Big ramble inbound about role-playing in New Vegas. Be warned.

Jamie despises the NCR. Hates thinking about politics, always felt powerless in the face of the neo-American monster spreading all around her home. I wanted to role-play someone so angrily, bitterly "apolitical" that she fell into supporting fascism. Caesar gave her a chance at power, at sticking it to the NCR, feeling important for the first time in her life. ...But she doesn't genuinely believe in the Legion's values. It's not like she's supporting them because she fucking loves slavery. She's more like Caesar himself than any Legionary—the rules are just a path to power, to be ignored as she sees fit. Hell, she's a woman fighting in support of a nation that subjugates women in every way (and to be clear, she loves getting to be the exception). I went through most of the Legion path quest with her, role-playing as someone who ultimately thinks the Legion's values are full of bullshit, but enjoying the power trip it gives her.

Then came the DLC! I role-played her going to Zion in Honest Hearts as her trying to get away from all the constant politics over Hoover Dam. God knows she doesn't need the money from the caravan job, that reason wouldn't swing. Starting with that conceit meant that something along the way would have to motivate her back to helping the Legion slaughter NCR at Hoover Dam. I figured Ulysses would do that in Lonesome Road. I wanted her to have some kind of arc, y'know?

Unfortunately, Old World Blues took my power-hungry gal with no real patriotism, and handed her a giant science lab littered with weapons of mass destruction. She didn't kill the Think Tank scientists, but coerced them into working for her. The Big Empty is her horrifying, beautiful oyster. During Dead Money, Elijah told her exactly how to use this Old World technology to wreak havoc on the Mojave. Why does she need Caesar anymore? She can wage war on the NCR completely independently. No one can make her feel powerless again.

In Lonesome Road, I tried to come up with a way for Ulysses' ramblings to give her some pro-Legion epiphany. But that doesn't feel authentic to how I've played this character. It feels more genuine for her to kill the fuck out of Ulysses for judging her, and come out more angry at the "Bear and Bull" than ever before. If anything, Ulysses trying to nuke the NCR just reinforces the lesson that she doesn't need the Legion to destroy the Woke Gay NCR she hates so much. She can wipe all of it away.

I was trying to do a Legion playthrough with a twist. Instead, it ended up being the story of a woman who thought she needed the Legion to exercise her rage, but amassed so much power that she lashed out against them too. A story about how people who act in service of power, rather than ideals, will ultimately betray everyone around them.

....And that's how my Legion run turned into another ding-dang Yes Man run at the last second! Ring-a-ding, baby!

[sailxrmxrs]

another fic contest let's go gamers. my entry for the robo is bored fic raffle over in the bloomic discord! for the last one i wrote pirate xyx and went a little stir crazy listening to sea shanties at 6am so this time around there's no au, just quest being chronically offline (affectionate). it's the first time mc is visiting his place and staying over and they discover that quest is just a guy with old mixtapes and a flip phone. nothing crazy n wild just some gentle heehee hahas directed at beloved discord mod quest still living in the early 2000s. writing this gave some nice nostalgic flashbacks to when everyone had flip phones and cassette players. what a time. time to blast everytime we touch by cascada until i lose my mind once again <3

Evening had settled over the city, the last remaining vestiges of warm amber light disappearing beyond the towering buildings that lined the city streets. A calmness permeated the air, the atmosphere far removed from earlier in the day when you'd first walked among the throngs of people. The only constant had been Quest walking beside you, fingers intertwined as his graps was warm and firm. Making time to come and visit him had been exactly what the two of you needed after recent stresses with work and general adult life. To spend a long weekend wrapped up in each other's attention provided a detox that left you feeling refreshed all over, and the weekend stay had only just begun. Being together like this felt as natural as breathing. The lull in conversation was anything but awkward as you walked the quiet streets in silence, illuminated by the diminishing sunlight rays of the golden hour. But as the day was reaching its end, your energy had also been depleted. The familiar ache of tiredness pressed at your eyes and the yawn you tried to muffle did not go unnoticed.

"Tired, angel?" Quest's thumbs rubbed circles on the back of your hand as you walked. The soothing gesture didn't help to keep the tiredness at bay.

You nodded. "A little."

"Then how about we head back to the car, grab something to eat at home get all nice and cosy in bed." He was already leading you to where he'd parked the car after picking you up from the hotel you'd stayed in overnight after a far-too-late flight the night before.

"Mm sounds nice." Your voice had grown quieter, your entire body leaning closer to Quest's as you walked. Luckily the car wasn't too far away and the drive home disappeared in a blur. Music played quietly from the speakers, Quest softly singing along as his fingers tapped absentmindedly against the steering wheel. It all felt so perfect. As though everything that had transpired in your lives had been leading up to this moment. Then as the car rolled to a stop as the traffic lights turned red, the music faded into silence. Quest’s deft hands moved to press a button as a CD popped out of the stereo system to switch it out for another. He leaned across your body, reaching for the storage compartment as he pulled out a square organiser filled with CDs—some you recognised and others that were entirely unfamiliar.

“Still using CDs? That’s actually kind of cute,” you mused, offering a hand to take the CD organiser from Quest to return to its home so that he could focus on driving once more.

Quest laughed, his cheeks warming as he replied. “I wouldn’t say that. More just sticking to what I know.”

The rest of the car journey passed by with minimal conversation, the sky turning a deep shade of purple as the sun fully set. Quest led you up to his apartment, holding open the door for you after unlocking it.

“Make yourself at home while I go put your stuff in the bedroom,” Quest offered, still carrying the small suitcase you’d brought with you. He was determined not to let you lift a finger the entire time you stayed with him, no matter how much you tried to convince him otherwise.

“You know I’m capable of carrying that myself, right?”

“A fact that I’m more than aware of. But that’s not going to stop me from doing everything for you,” Quest teased, reaching out a finger to poke your nose while you tried to wave his hand away. His laugh was warm as he gazed at you, an unmissable happiness permeating every feature on his kind face. You’d seen a happy Quest on more than a few occasions when you’d video called each other but this was something different. He seemed more relaxed and at ease than he had before, as if being in your presence affected him so acutely that it could be seen in the warmth of his eyes and the slight creases that appeared to be permanent etches with how often he smiled at you. He just felt so much more. And it had butterflies tingling in your stomach each minute you remained in his presence. Even after he left your side, the lingering after effects of Quest were present as ever. In his absence, you decided to let curiosity get the better of you. His apartment was decorated fairly minimally. It wasn’t bare by any means, but rather just as comfy as he needed it to be. Nothing more, nothing less. It felt so quintessentially Quest that you couldn’t have imagined the place looking any other way. As you mused over an old framed photo of a much younger Quest with who you assumed were his siblings, Quest emerged from his bedroom and made his way over to you. He left a soft kiss on your cheek before moving to the other side of the room.

“Some music okay?” He asked, fingers leafing through a pile of CDs kept on a shelf.

“Even more CDs?” You joked, an arm reaching around Quest as he rolled his eyes but continues his search.

Looking at the array before you, you let out a gasp. “Are they old mixtapes? I haven’t seen a cassette like this in years!” Holding the tape in your hands, you revelled in the nostalgia of Quest’s music collection. Though, looking around it felt as if you’d been transported back in time. Only then did it become much more apparent that Quest didn’t seem to have anything particularly new around—at least nothing technologically new. Sending him a playful glance, you asked, “Any chance you’ve heard of a playlist before? You know, the new age mixtape.”

Quest placed down the CD in hand and turned to you, an eyebrow raised as he pried the mixtape from you. “Some of us enjoy the technology of out childhood. Also I can’t get spotify on my phone anyway.

You blinked. “What? Quest you’re literally a mod for a discord server and you’re telling me your phone can’t even download an app?”

“That better not be judgement I’m hearing.”

“Never. But is this where you tell me you have a flip phone?” You had meant the comment to be a joke, not expecting Quest to reach into his back pocket and pull out exactly that. It took all of the self-restraint you possessed to not burst into giggles at Quest’s semi-serious expression. From the moment you’d met him he’d been full of surprises but this one might have been your favourite. "Like I said before, that's adorable. Unexpected, but adorable."

Quest blushed as he pocketed the phone again, looking unsuspecting as he hesitated for a moment before lifting you up and over his shoulder. He made a beeline for the sofa where he gently threw you down, his laugh mingling with yours in a symphony of sound. Quest's hands were firm on your wrists and holding them at each side of your head as he looked down at you, his smile taunting.

"To think, my very own angel is making fun of me for having an old phone."

It was hard to reply between laughs, but you somehow managed to get your words out. "I'm not making fun! I called you cute!"

"What if I don't want to be cute? You're killing my ego here, angel."

"Oh how awful, I feel so terrible." Your echoed with sarcasm as you oushed against Quest's weight over you. He relinquished, letting you sit up but not moving from where he sat. His hands were still on your wrists and he gently tugged on them, encouraging you to move closer. If you moved even a centimetre further, your nose would be grazing his. It didn't take much encouragement to close that gap, Quest's lips gentle against yours. Though despite how gently he held you, it was clear that he was holding back—waiting for some kind of signal to continue. But you didn't give him the satisfaction. Instead, you pulled away, smiling as he regarded you with for adoration and affection than perhaps you'd ever felt in your life.

"I like where this is going," you started, voice low and hushed despite being the only two people in the room. "But I believe you promised me a meal and a nap when we got back."

Quest's laugh was explosive, his head tilting back as he laced his fingers with yours. Once his amusement abated enough to speak, he replied. "You really will be the death of me, won't you, angel? But of course, anything my darling commands."

[nightingaelic]

Fallout new vegas companions taking the courier's place in lonesome road (+ cut companions if that's cool with u) (thanks!!)

The problem with trying to adapt Lonesome Road to another character's experience is that so much of its story hinges on the courier's missing past and the former Frumentarius' struggle to make them understand what happened, why it caused a shockwave across multiple lives, locations and generations, and whether to avenge or let go of the harm that was unknowingly done to the Divide. So if you bring the companions into the mix instead of Courier Six, you either have a long-running story of mistaken identity (a hilarious concept, Ulysses being absolutely positive that the companion is the one who wrecked his dream home while they have no idea who this angry, verbose man is), or a drastically different history for the companions themselves. I say let's give that second option a shot, it seems fun and headcanon-y.

Arcade Gannon: While I don't think Arcade would be directly responsible for the destruction of the Divide, I think he would pale at hearing Ulysses' message searching for Enclave agents and would set out to confront the angry courier on behalf of his hidden family. The Enclave remnants are already hunted by the NCR and the Brotherhood of Steel, and the last thing they need is to be chased out of yet another home over something they didn't personally do. He'd accept ED-E's help wholeheartedly and consider turning back every time he ran into marked men or tunnelers, but his own resolve to save his loved ones would urge him to persevere. I think his determination would intrigue Ulysses, enough to engage the young research scientist in conversation if he arrived at the end of the road in one piece, and the courier might even let go of his vendetta if Arcade revealed that he was doing this out of the goodness of his heart rather than a sense of duty. Arcade would cancel the nuke launch, but would seriously consider blowing up the Legion.

Craig Boone: We know the NCR and Legion were fighting over the Divide before the ICBMs leveled the area. But what if that was by design, rather than by accident? Maybe Boone has more skeletons in his closet than just Bitter Springs, and he was part of a strike team that used old Enclave technology to surprise the Legion forces and seal off an access route, a decision based on math and made by men who had never met the people of Hopeville and Ashton that they sentenced to death. It's yet another weight on the sniper's conscience, and yet another debt he feels obligated to pay, so when Ulysses' call goes out, he answers. The usual dangers of the Divide wouldn't slow him down, but the turbulent weather would irritate him to no end. Upon arrival at the temple, Boone wouldn't mince words because he already knows he's guilty of the charge and he knows Ulysses used to walk for the Legion. If he survived the encounter, Boone would take the opportunity to rain the same destruction down on Caesar's troops.

Lily Bowen: There are about 119 years of Lily's life as a super mutant that are unaccounted-for, and we know she suffers from schizophrenia like many other nightkin. Perhaps it was Lily who discovered the Enclave package and unwittingly left it in the home of America's missiles: Perhaps it was Leo. I'm inclined to think it was Leo, who was probably searching for a cache of Stealth Boys in the old military installations across the desert, and who simply didn't care when a new hole in the earth opened up behind him. Lily, on the other hand, cares deeply, and would set out after Ulysses in the interest of making amends where she could. More so than any other companion, I think Lily would be disturbed by the tunnelers and would go out of her way to crush them wherever they popped up. The marked men would earn her sympathy and she would do her best to knock them out without killing them. After doing the same to Ulysses, Lily would cancel the launch and weep over the subsequent loss of ED-E. She would likely bring the little eyebot back to the Mojave and search for a way to fix it.

Raul Alfonso Tejada: We already know that Raul goes to extreme lengths to avenge the people he cares about, so it wouldn't be too much of a stretch to mix his backstory into the story of the Divide. Following the murder of Claudia in Tucson/Two Sun, Raul chased Dirty Dave and his brothers across Arizona and into the town of Ashton before killing them. Unbeknownst to him, Dirty Dave had a package with him that could speak to the nuclear missile silos hidden in the Divide, and the earth crumbled behind the vaquero as he made his way back home. Though he'd heard of the devastation, Raul didn't put two and two together until Ulysses sent out his summons, and because he didn't have anything planned that week, the old mechanic decided to answer the call. He would put up with Ulysses' messages like a good sport until he encountered the man in the temple, where he would refuse to fight until the two talked things out like civil people. I think Ulysses would be surprised at the revelation that the ghoul he had cast as a villain was following his own quest for vengeance and unaware of the package, and would come away somewhat amused by the situation. They would most likely team up to fight off the marked men, and Raul would cancel the launch and take a wrench to the machines to prevent any more "misunderstandings."

Rose of Sharon Cassidy: Let's say one of Cass' caravans delivered a package back in the day. Let's say that package accidentally buried the caravan crew and an entire community along with it. Let's say Cass knows, and that's one of the reasons she drinks. While Courier Six walks the Divide out of curiosity about their missing past, I think Cass would do it as a form of penance in and of itself, with a little desire for self-destruction thrown into the mix. The journey would start out as a bender fueled by self-loathing and the fanciful notion of giving her missing caravan a proper funeral, and by the time Cass runs out of whiskey she's already halfway through the Cave of the Abaddon and punching holes through the tunnelers with her shotgun. She would largely ignore Ulysses' cryptic messages and holotapes, but she'd grow fond of the little eyebot that took a shine to her and would tear after it once the mysterious courier repossessed it. Following the final battle, Cass would cancel the launch, but only at the very last second, just to revel in the fleeting feeling of control.

Veronica Santangelo: I just can't see Veronica knowingly or unknowingly waking up a nuclear arsenal with a careless application of tech, but I can totally see her stumbling upon the aftermath of something her old mentor is responsible for. Father Elijah already has a tenuous grasp on the consequences of his own actions, and we know that the prototype tech that controls the Divide's weather is a Big MT project. Maybe Elijah paid Hopeville a visit to check it out and took his investigation a little too far when he discovered the nukes. This would explain Ulysses' directions to the old man to find the Sierra Madre, sealing his doom inside the casino. But where does that leave Ulysses? Along comes Veronica, following her mentor's trail of destruction, and the courier can't help but guide her along the path, show her the meaning of the wreckage and the danger of pre-war technology when left to the discretion of those with old-world values, like the Brotherhood. Along that line, I think Ulysses would try to test her like he does Courier Six, and would schedule a launch to see what she does. Veronica would cancel the launch and resolve to never tell her brothers and sisters in Steel about the secrets of the Divide. She might dump some water on the consoles for good measure. More importantly, I think she might finally realize that the unchanging family she clings to can only die out, or go down the same path that Elijah did.

ED-E: Given that ED-E is a robot, I think Ulysses would be hell-bent on finding whoever sent the little guy rather than consider that the eyebot saw a package with Enclave markings on it, picked it up of its own accord, and deposited it wherever it next encountered old American symbols. Through its communication with the other eyebots in the Divide, I think ED-E would get the picture about the courier's quest for the responsible party and play dumb for as long as possible. The other ED-E would help conceal the mistake to save its new friend, but Ulysses isn't stupid and would eventually figure it out. But how do you effectively punish a robot? Maybe he would set the nukes to target the Divide again, to send any remaining eyebots to the scrapyard for good, but it's a long shot. If he did, ED-E would cancel the launch, but would join its override system capabilities to its counterpart's and use the combined decryption power to ensure that both eyebots make it through the ordeal unharmed.

Rex: This good boy would never even consider entering the Divide. Seriously, what dog in their right mind would go in there? What cyberdog? No thank you. Still, the idea of a dog being responsible for the nukes and Ulysses continuing to hold a grudge is beyond funny. Maybe Rex was part of a mission for the Legion when he still belonged to Caesar, part of the group that leveled the Divide on behalf of the Bull. Maybe that's why Antony says he was "lost in battle," and maybe he's the only surviving member of that squad. I don't see why Ulysses would hang around the Divide waiting for the dog to look upon the hell he'd wrought, and he would more than likely seek the canine out himself as soon as he heard about the King's new pet. From there, the story turns into Courier Six investigating an assassination attempt on a goddamned dog, and the events of Lonesome Road play out pretty much the same way they were written - plus plenty of asides about how Ulysses is going to way too much effort over a creature that can't comprehend what nukes are.

Benny Gecko: Few people know that Yes Man was actually one of two securitrons that Benny managed to incapacitate and reprogram, and while the head of the Chairmen hid his favorite in the Tops for safekeeping, he sent the other out into the world for some recon and experimentation. Imagine his surprise when Yes Man was able to remotely hack into a nuclear missile silo and wipe out a budding trade community. And who would've thought that test run was going to come back to bite him in the ass, right after he was sprung from the Legion camp? I think Benny would do everything in his power to avoid entering the Divide, but I also think Ulysses would have little patience for him and would actively force the disgraced city boy into walking the Courier's Mile by blocking any other path out of the Mojave. Benny would form an attachment to ED-E, similar to Yes Man, but would complain the whole way and confront his tormenter with little remorse. He would also nuke both the NCR and the Legion if he came away alive, probably with some snarky one-liner about "letting the chips fall where they may."

Vulpes Inculta: Vulpes already has a few scorched-earth badges on his Pioneer Scouts belt (Nipton, Camp Searchlight, etc.), so eliminating the Divide is just another tactic in the grand strategy playing out between the Bull and the Bear. All he needed to do was leave a certain package in town, and the problem basically solved itself. Unfortunately, that deserter of his wasn't buried under the wreckage, and now Caesar has ordered him to assassinate the renegade. The fool keeps announcing his whereabouts every few hours or so, making tracking an easy task, but by the third time he feels eyes on the back of his neck and turns to find nothing there, Vulpes can't help but wonder whether the student has surpassed the teacher. The final showdown of Frumentarii would be something for the ages, a clash of philosophies and loyalties with plenty of verbal sparring between the bullets. If he survived the encounter with Ulysses, Vulpes would definitely nuke the NCR.

Ulysses: This cut companion can't very well face off against himself, can he? Unless... he was the courier who accidentally brought the Enclave detonator that sealed the Divide's doom. Given the weight of this grief, I think Ulysses would similarly force himself to walk the length of the Divide, take in the utter destruction that his own actions had wrought, and reflect on the meaning of one man changing the course of history. When it came down to the final room, the final decision, our disillusioned courier would activate the launch as a way of testing himself, testing his own resolve. Like Cass, he would stare at the machines shuddering to life around him until the very last moment, before shutting the system down for good, smiling under his breathing mask and walking away forever.

Victor: The robot cowboy doesn't really know what the angry man on the eyebot keeps talking about. He certainly doesn't remember delivering a package to a place called Hopeville or Ashton. Why would he? Mr. House is very good about covering his tracks, particularly when it comes to eliminating business rivals. Really, it could have been any old securitron. Nevertheless, Victor rolls merrily along in search of the courier who summoned his master, letting his own optics passively take in the devastated wasteland left behind by bombs that launched 200 years too late. Because of his robotic nature, I think it'd be a lot easier for Ulysses to get the drop on Victor and disable him at the temple, then wait until House sent another envoy or came himself. House would probably lose interest as soon as he got his data, which I don't think would stall Ulysses much: Once he figured out the Strip's owner isn't coming, he'd find some way to get inside the Lucky 38. If, however, Victor prevailed in the final struggle, he would nuke both the NCR and the Legion on behalf of Mr. House.

[whaleofatjme1920]

howdy! i’m neah! (she/they, 19, creepypasta/mh, romantic)

this is for the special event, i hope i’m doing this right!

i’m a musician. i spend a lot of my time writing music in online programs and playing saxophone. i also write, but not nearly as well as you. i have real shitty health, so i’m a powerlifter who doesn’t run too much. i stay busy but burn out easy. my love language is baking and physical touch, even if i’m touch adverse sometimes. i am very, very emotional in all ranges as someone with bp1, but it can be good. i love deeply and am ready for that red string. i also own a cat!

i can offer up cookies i’ve baked, my old laptop, and a broken key from my sax that’s been sitting in the case. i’ll even add in my cat pin from the case for spice.

(i’m sorry if this is incorrect!)

[Disclaimer: The Red String of Fate event is a special event I'm running from August 12th, to whenever I feel it necessary to end - right now, I'm giving it to the first week of September! Check out rules HERE]

It's not often that the God receives letters from people who make him scratch his head at who he should pair you with. He's been a matchmaker for centuries. His threads have birthed kingdoms and brought nations to their knees, because what bounds does love know?

He smiles as he reads the letter you've gifted him. There are many things he doesn't understand simply because he's just the old man under the moon, but he appreciates you all the same. He munches on the cookies you've given him and mentally notes what a good baker you are. He doesn't really understand technology, but his cat seems to appreciate the warmth that spills from it as it charges. The key gives him interest too, and the pin is attached to his robes, however, he thinks the pin might serve a different purpose.

Yue Lao attaches the thread to your left pinky and looks into circles of people he knows would suit you well. He crosses over a man who seems to love threads just as much as he does. The golden colors attract his weathered eyes but his attention is stolen by a smile bathed in blood. How... Odd. The God notes, checking the match over. Helen would be a very suitable match. He knows it. The artistry he can see in the man's life even if it's less than moral, the personality of someone who can make you feel like the only person in the world, and the way his heart swells when he even lays thought to the two of you.

He gives the cat pin to his trusty feline, attaching it to her collar before asking her to retrieve one of his spools. It's a strong spool, one of threads made from Princess Zhinu, and symbolizes an eternal kind of love. Something romantic, something stable. It will never fail you. He ties it to your match's pinky, whispering to the man in his dreams that a cat with a pin attached to her collar will take him on the quest of a lifetime before severing the thread from the spool.

In the morning, Helen awakes confused from his dreams. He's never really followed any strange cats before. As he runs about his normal day, his "friends" note his odd behavior. What on earth is he really searching for? While in a bar with Laughing Jack, Toby and Jeff, Helen sees it. A cat, darting through the crowd of people. There's a pin attached to her collar.

Helen is up, barely even giving a second glance to the people he pushes awkwardly through as he follows her. On his pinky, the thread the God has gifted him begins to glow and reveal itself. He glances down to it, and realizes the cat is taking him in the direction it flows. Once the cat realizes Helen is aware, she slows down and they match pace. She takes him to a neighborhood through one of the Slender Man's many portals to your home.

She sits down on the porch, mews softly, and then rubs against his shins before darting off. Helen awkwardly stands at your door, readying himself to knock. He's unaware that you're inside, watching the tug of your string grow more taught. You can smell high end cologne, and can see his shadow shining in the afternoon sun. With a small breath, you open the door and are greeted to him right before he can knock.

He's got the most lovely blue eyes you've ever seen, and he looks at you like you're a masterpiece.

[angstmongertina]

The Vision of Lachesis

Spoilers for Artem’s Entwined Fates SSR card story! Also, warning for angst and implied/mentioned character death, because I can only write so much fluff before things get angsty.

I had this idea almost as soon as I played the Entwined Fates card story because I am a sucker for outside POV fics, though the idea for the last scene came later lol. Incidentally, if you want to skip the angst, just stop before the little warning I put in there. Everything before it should be perfectly fluffy.

Cross-posted to AO3.

In his years living at Cloudbreak Temple, Master Lu has already seen many visitors pass through its gate, all with various different hopes and dreams and stories filling their souls. He has seen everyone, from new babies to old grandmothers, from shy young couples to blissful newlyweds and bickering old spouses. And still, the pair he spies entering the temple catch his attention.

He is, as is always the case during the busy festival days, pulled in all directions at once, guiding petitioners through the rituals of prayer and interpreting fortune, but even so, he cannot help but keep an eye on them. A man in front, tall and middle-aged, wearing a solemn expression that does not quite suit the laugh lines on his face, and a boy, not yet fully grown and quiet, shying away slightly from the noise and bustle around him but watching the proceedings with a bright, piercing gaze. The man says something, a gentle hand clapping the boy’s shoulder in a warm, fatherly gesture that brings a faint smile to the small face, before they dive into the crowd, and he turns his attention back to the couple before him.

Thankfully, they do not comment on his preoccupation and he puts the others out of mind as he helps them determine their fortunes.

The next time he sees the pair, they are with old Master Wang, which comes as no great surprise to him. Although Cloudbreak Temple may be most well-known for petitions to the star of wisdom, they accommodate many types of prayers, and while the boy may be of the age where success in learning and exams is important, one glance at the youthful face is enough to tell him that the boy has both intelligence and diligence to spare, and furthermore, a concrete attitude that would likely dismiss the thought of appealing to prayers for school out of hand. No, there is no need for prayers for success. But for safety, on the other hand…

He moves a little closer, still not yet so close as to be truly spying, but near enough to get a better look at the pair. The man is dressed casually, long brown hair pulled out of his face, and stands almost at a slouch, but the eyes that observe the world around him through thin-rimmed glasses are far from relaxed. Instead, their grey depths are cautious, sharp, clearly accustomed to seeking out the truth behind every person, every choice and interaction. It is only when they fall on the young man beside him do they soften with affection and concern. A man of action, of justice and strong morals, though perhaps of some impetuousness and with a fragility under it all.

A man, in short, who likely puts himself into the path of danger for the good of the people around him, but who also might shatter should he be pushed to the brink, should the lives of those he cares about be on the line.

And the boy…

Master Lu frowns, brushing a thoughtful hand over his chin and the faint beginnings of a thick beard as the man ruffles the boy’s hair and he looks up at his companion with a small but adoring smile.

The boy still has a whole entire life in store for him, of that he is certain. And one that will no doubt intersect with the temple again.

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When the couple steps through the gates of the temple, the man sheltering the girl beside him from the crowds, he notices them immediately. Though many years have passed, he has learned to trust his instincts, even beyond what his mind may tell him, and his gut recognizes the man long before his eyes do. The boy has grown, of course, in the ensuing two decades, but the bright intelligence, the thoughtfulness and care, all harken back to the shy child of so long ago.

But rather than his old friend and mentor, this time, the man brings with him a companion of his own. At first glance, she is just as bright-eyed and curious as he once was, though perhaps with more anxiety than he had, focusing immensely on the tasks before her. And the way he watches her…

Before he knows it, he is approaching the pair, standing at a table for the star of wisdom, and offers his assistance. He sees her attention flit away as her partner leaves for his own prayer, following him through the crowd with her eyes and her mind; though she appears to be unaware of it herself, her partner knows, and he knows, that even apart, their hearts, their very lives themselves, are irrevocably entwined, two souls pulled together by an inescapable gravity that he had not seen in decades, if ever.

He cannot help his curiosity about them, about this pair that seems to confirm the very existence of fate itself. These two lawyers, partners, these two halves of a single whole, that the universe has brought together, in an act of perfect balance.

Their marriage fortunes, an offer he makes that is part personal interest, part guiding hand, come as a surprise, though perhaps it should not have been wholly unexpected. He has never been wrong before, not about the couples who have captured his attention, but this…

This is less of a gentle nudge from fate and more of a flashing neon sign.

She reacts to her fortune tag first and he cannot help but smile at the curiosity, at the innocence, in her eyes. “I cannot keep my heart, as it longs to be with you…” A straightforward fortune, as befitting the girl who watches her partner with subconscious adoration, who still does not see his unconditional tenderness, who still does not understand her own constant preoccupation, for what they are. In time, she will realize.

But her partner…

He knows from the moment he sees the man’s face that the meaning of his own fortune is not lost on him. “It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.” And it is fitting for him, for the way he turns away from this, his hesitant heart, cautiously hopeful for a sign that the undying flame he carries will not be snuffed out, bruised from this heavy blow from fate, determined to carry its burden alone, to push his feelings aside and pretend that all is well, as he has always done.

It is a cautionary tale, this particular fortune, and he can say nothing, can only look on in weighty silence, as its recipient takes his companion and continues down his ill-fated and forewarned path.

Or, at least, attempts to, but for the efforts of the girl by his side. He does not listen to the conversation not meant for his ears but he does not need to, not when her thoughts are written clear across her face, not when she tugs her partner back to hear his explanation.

Not when she, despite being still oblivious to the depth of their connection, to the direction of her heart, immediately moves to petition, to help, to find some way of reversing the luck, propelled by outward concern and hidden affection.

He gives them directions both to the wishing tree and for the method to improve one’s luck and watches as she leaps at each opportunity, apparently unaware of the implications, in her quest to lessen her companion’s misfortune. But the man, now wearing a near constant smile of stunned helplessness, knows, even if he cannot, or perhaps more likely, will not, let himself, discern the cause of her concern.

Not even when it involves her suggesting that they bind their fortunes together on the wishing tree.

He chuckles, running his fingers over his beard as he watches them, their gentle discussion and animated features, both conveying so much to the world that they are too close, too farsighted, to see. But in this moment, it is not his place to say anything, to interfere any further, and so he doesn’t. Fate has already shown her own interest in their future, one that they have accepted and furthered, without, apparently, even realizing it.

Ah, to be young and in love.

Waving off their thanks, he watches as they leave before shaking his head and letting out the full-bellied laugh that he has been holding back since he first met them. In all of his years working at the temple, he has never been wrong before, and he is certain that he will not be wrong this time.

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The first day of the festival dawns early and bright, with that telltale warmth that foretells another hot August day. Even before the temple is open for visitors, anticipation hums through the air, the faint buzz as everyone prepares for the inevitable rush of petitioners.

Standing before the steps to the main temple, Master Lu looks out over the entire grounds with a smile. While the outside world has changed drastically in the past decades, within the temple, it is like being transported back in time; the same old tables from years past have already been set up, and the decorations, while not entirely the exact same as those used in centuries past, have all been remade in the original style.

In the fast-paced and ever-changing world, it is almost a sanctuary from time itself, where the tags of decades of visitors remain for an eternity and the history and traditions of the ancestors are preserved for future generations.

Well, at least in some ways more than others, if the influx of technology, and not just from forgetful visitors, is any indication.

He shakes his head, chuckling at his own preoccupation as he dodges young Master Zhao, juggling his attention between the pile of fortunes carried in his arms and the phone jammed under his ear. Clearly, he has begun to get overly sentimental in his old age.

Alas, yet another reminder of the inevitability of the passage of time.

The entry of visitors, a veritable tsunami of petitioners all looking to arrive early, interrupts his thoughts and he turns his attention to them, casting an experienced eye over the crowd. As usual, the vast majority make a beeline straight for the table for the star of wisdom, drawn as ever to the promise of good scores and success. Young couples make their way to the table for marriage fortunes, fresh-eyed and smitten with each other. And others still filter towards the other tables, for peace and wealth and…

And safety.

He spots the small family almost as soon as they pass through the gates, though they are admittedly hard to miss. The man and woman walk arm in arm, slow and cautious against the crush of the people around them, his form shifting to act as a barrier to shield her against the worst of the crowd. The height of the man alone would have been enough to catch his attention, but it is accentuated by the tiny pigtailed girl riding on his shoulders, adding another head to their overall height. From her perch, she looks around with bright, curious eyes, a small hand pointing towards the main temple, and him.

Even across the distance, he can see the surprise and recognition flicker in the bright blue eyes that meet his, and he would not have been able to hide his grin even if he had tried. As it is, though, he does not try, instead stepping forward to meet them with a greeting.

“I don’t know if you remember us, but…”

He shakes his head, waving off the woman’s comment with a laugh. “I do.”

And of course he does. How could he not? They have matured, naturally, settling into one combined force rather than two beings still tumbling in each other’s orbits; her hair is longer now, pulled into a neat bun, and his more disheveled than he’s ever seen under the ministrations of toddler hands; but the same spirit, the same keen eyes and entwined fates, shine out from the pair, unique amongst the crowd of other visitors.

He grins. “Of course I do. After all, it’s not every day I draw two fortunes quite so complementary, and even more rare to have them be hung up together on the wishing tree like that.”

At that, she laughs as well, her cheeks reddening slightly, and pauses to shake her bangs out of her face. “Yes, well, you were right, and it all worked out in the end.” She turns to her husband with a playful look, elbowing him gently in the ribs. “Even if it did take the better part of another year.”

“That is on you just as much as it is on me. After all, it took you just as long to realize,” the man retorts, though, to his amusement, his ears flush a faint red, which only deepens when their daughter points them out in a chipper voice, one loud enough that several visitors nearby turn to glance at them.

From the mouth of babes…

“What brings you back? Not just to check on your old tags, no?”

Shooting him a grateful look for the subject change, the man shakes his head, a faint smile curling the edges of his mouth. “No, though it is an added bonus. We’ve come for a new prayer for safety.”

His wife nudges him again, though gentler this time, and with less vigor. “Two, remember?”

He laughs openly, an expression that makes him look years younger, as he drops a hand to the gentle swell of her abdomen. “It may be a little early for that, still. I think he at least needs to have an official name first.”

She wrinkles her nose at him before laughing in turn. “Fine, fine. We will just have to come back again in a year or two.”

“Of course. Anything for you.”

“Daddy!”

A comically dramatic wince flashes across the man’s face when his daughter leans over, her voice projecting with unerring precision directly into his ear, and his wife is left hiding her amusement with some difficulty.

“Too loud, baobei.”

The bright blue eyes widen in distress. “Sorry, Daddy!”

He chuckles, reaching up to clasp her small fist in his hand. “It’s okay, baobei. What is it?”

Squirming from her perch on his shoulders, she points towards the back of the temple, where a few decorated branches of the wishing tree can be seen hanging over the roof. “Big tree! ‘S pretty! Go see?”

He shakes his head. “Later, maybe. First we have to—”

“No! Go see!” She leans over until she is hanging directly in front of his eyes. “Daddy, please?”

The man glances at his wife, who shrugs, mouthing the word “softie” while still wearing that same huge grin, and he finds that he has to struggle to choke back his laugh before anyone notices.

Given the soft snort that reaches his ears, he only partly succeeds.

“All right, then. Let’s go. We can come back for a prayer of safety”—the man glances back down at his wife, a faint but wondering smile dancing on his lips—“or even two, later.” With a solemn expression, the man offers him a deep, respectful nod, one that he is not quick enough to wave away. “Thank you, Master.”

“Bye-bye!”

Laughing, he waves at the trio, watching as they slowly weave their way through the crowd towards the back of the temple. Even across that distance, he can feel the affection and respect they hold for each other, can see the connection they share, which have managed to catch his attention time and time again.

When they finally move out of sight, he turns back to the temple and the flood of other guests, making a mental note to keep an eye out for the little family in future years. Maybe he can take a small break from drawing marriage fortunes in favor of overseeing prayers for safety for a few years…

STOP NOW IF YOU DON’T WANT ANGST.

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The sky is still dark with storm clouds when they first dare venture back outside to examine the state of the temple. In some ways, it is almost a miracle; despite the weeks of heavy storms, accompanied by shrieking gales and large hail, Cloudbreak Temple and its inhabitants have been mostly unharmed, save for superficial damages, just in time for the summer festival. Still, the mood is quiet, solemn, as everyone sets to work, clearing away the fallen branches, discarding the broken shingles, and making room for the stations as best they can in the limited time they have.

Wandering over the grounds, Master Lu shakes his head. Summer storms are not uncommon in the mountains, but even in the many decades that he has spent at Cloudbreak Temple, he has never seen a storm like that one, lightning seeming to rent the sky in two and thunder shaking the foundations of the temple itself, where there was naught to do but to stay indoors and safe. They were truly fortunate that nobody was injured and that most of the damages can be repaired.

Unfortunately, not all of the temple has remained quite so intact.

Stopping at the edge of the courtyard, he sighs, casting his gaze over the mess. It does not come as a complete surprise, given the lashing of the rain or the howling of the wind, but that does not change the sorrow he feels at the destruction that greets his eyes. Where there was once a majestic, venerable camphor tree is now a tired, wizened old thing, bowing under its own weight in the weak hints of daylight. Fortune tags lay strewn amongst the branches that had once held them aloft, once vivid symbols of the future now simply dark red and brown patches against muddy green, that he has to pick his way around as he wanders further in, taking in all of the damage.

But there is no time to clean up the mess, not in his old age and with everything else that will be happening for the day, and the visitors will understand, have to understand. He shakes his head, feeling all of his many years pressing down on his shoulders, almost as though he is fighting the weight of all the fallen wishes themselves.

“Master Lu?”

He looks up at the familiar voice and smiles. Master Chen, arms full of red cords, stands in the entryway of the courtyard, his bright eyes filled with concern, and he suddenly finds himself wondering when they all got so young.

“What is it? Do you need my help with anything?”

The boy shakes his head. “No, we are almost finished. There are enough of us to finish and handle the visitors, since there likely will not be many so soon after the storm. If you want, I could help clean this area…”

He shakes his head again, this time with a more genuine smile. “No, you go on. They’ll be needing you in the main temple, I’m sure. I can work here.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

Chen nods, putting the new cords on the nearby table before giving him a small, formal bow. “Thank you. Then I leave this to you.”

He waves the kid away, chuckling slightly as he watches him turn and walk back to the main temple before turning his attention back to the courtyard and the scattered fortunes, the remembrances of years, or decades even, of hopes and dreams.

With another heavy sigh, he squats down, tossing some fallen branches aside before picking up the wooden fortune at his feet. It is old, the carved text worn down by the elements, and he runs his fingers over the inscription, a brief statement on the virtues of hard work. A student had hung it there, once upon a time, and he closes his eyes for a moment, hoping that they achieved their goals, before tucking it into his robes and continuing forward.

In some ways, it is almost a walk down memory lane. Prayers to the star of wisdom from students that have long since graduated, who may even be teachers and professors now. Prayers for safety for people who have moved beyond that point, who may have even already passed. Marriage fortunes, ones that he helped distribute and interpret, for young couples that are now parents or even grandparents of their own…

He stumbles to a stop, staring down at the ground by his feet. Lying in the grass, so hidden by mud that he almost missed them, are two wooden cards. Their surfaces are almost entirely obscured by the dirt, but he still recognizes them instantly, the pair of fortunes so opposite to each other, so perfectly complementary. Held to the branch and each other by a red cord that has split and frayed under the years, no doubt hastened by the tempest.

Heaving another sigh, he leans over and…

“Master?”

Caught off-guard he snaps upright, turning around with a polite refusal on the tip of his tongue, but his instincts, ever reliable, stay his reply as the appearance of the visitor sinks in.

Dressed in dark, muted colors, he is easy to overlook, blending into his surroundings, into any crowd, with little effort. His face is drawn, haggard, lines of exhaustion etched into his skin, making him look years older, while his dark hair is disheveled, streaked with gray. Altogether, the man in the entryway, tired and worn, is almost unrecognizable from the young, joyous father of his memory. In just the few years since he last visited, he has aged a decade, his strong, confident form now frail, once bright azure eyes now dimmed, haunted.

And the man approaches, moving forward with slow, hesitant steps, eyes fixed on the tags he holds in his hand.

“That… Is that…?”

The voice nearly breaks around those few words, hoarse and almost inaudible, but he doesn’t need to hear the rest of the question, doesn’t need an explanation to know what the man wants, to know what must have happened.

Closing his eyes, he bows his head. “Yes. It is. They must have fallen during the storm.”

He hears a labored, shuddering breath, one that makes his own chest tighten in sympathy. “I… May I?”

“Of course.” He steps forward, gently placing the tags into his outstretched hands, watching as trembling fingers brush over the faded markings, the broken cord, as the pale face twists with fresh pain. “I…” He clears his throat. “I’m sorry.”

“Me too.”

“Daddy?”

They both turn at the same time, where a small girl stands in the entryway of the courtyard, holding the hand of an older woman as she cradles a bundle in her other arm. Pulling free of the restraining grasp, she runs forward to join them, grabbing her father’s free hand. “Daddy?”

Something resembling a smile tugs at the corners of the man’s lips as he squats to his daughter’s eye level. “What is it, baobei?”

“Are you sad?”

The sound that leaves the man’s throat is more of a rasp than a chuckle, but neither of them seem to notice. “Yes.” He wraps an arm around the girl, lifting her into the air as he stands back up. “Yes, I am.”

To his surprise, the girl only nods solemnly before looking at the tags in his hand. “What is that?”

The man sighs, holding it up so she can examine it more closely, running her small fingers over the wood as he wipes away the mud. “Mama and I came here years ago and hung it up when we were here. Before you were even born.”

“Oh. It’s pretty.” A slight frown on her face, she studies the fortunes and the cord linking them before raising her gaze. “Do you miss Mama?”

He has to shift his gaze away as the smile on the man’s face crumbles, turning his attention back to the mess of branches and fortune tags, but even so, he cannot escape hearing the slight hitch in the quiet voice. “Every day.”

She sniffles, wrapping her arms around his neck and burying her face against his shoulder. “Me too.”

“Anthea!” The older woman reaches them, her face a mix of concern and frustration, and he can’t help but turn his attention back to the family. “I’m sorry, I didn’t think she would be so quick.”

The man shakes his head as she reaches for the girl, instead shifting her position in his arms. “It’s fine, Ma. Besides, you have enough on your hands. And you’ve done more than enough for us now.”

“Still…”

“Ma.” The man closes his eyes, gently shaking his head, before meeting her gaze with a determination that even he can feel, that makes him tear his gaze away once more, feeling vaguely like he is eavesdropping. “It’s okay. I’m okay. I…” A sigh that hangs in the air between them. “I need to do this. For her. But thank you for… for everything. And…”

A hand suddenly appears in his vision and he looks up to find the man before him, standing up straighter with a mix of sorrow and resolve dancing on his features. “I don’t know if you remember me, but…”

He shakes his head. “I do. Still.”

“Of course.” A small but genuine smile cracks his mouth as the man draws a deep breath. “I… I remember you said once that fortunes should be returned to the temple once they’ve come true and…” He swallows once, hard. “Can you put these back for me?”

“Yes, certainly.” He reaches for them, hand closing back around the fortunes that the man holds out.

Two little wooden tags have never felt so heavy in his palm before.

For a moment, the man stares at them, as though in his hands, in these fragile pieces of wood, he carries all the weight of the world, before tearing his gaze away to meet his. “Thank you.”

Oddly enough, when he opens his mouth, he finds a sudden lump in his throat and instead of trying to speak, he only inclines his head, but it is enough. The man smiles again, a soft, ephemeral expression, before turning and walking away, still carrying his daughter while his mother paces alongside him with his son in her arms.

As he watches them leave, he brushes his thumb over the worn fortunes he cradles, gently tracing the text that he still remembers like it had been drawn yesterday.

It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.

Leaving the courtyard, he silently enters the main temple, ignoring the questioning looks from his fellow masters and visitors alike as he sets the tag, still tied to its partner with muddy red cord, down amongst the various other fortunes of years past, and sits back on his heels, reading it over one last time.

And so it is.

[aros001]

Read through light novel vol. 7. Random thoughts.

I swear Goblin Slayer looks like he's blushing through his armor on that cover. I don't blame him, given it's Cow Girl, but that's what it looks like.

I always get a laugh out of Goblin Slayer's completely unwillingness or inability to remember any type of monster outside of goblins. I think he only knows what vampires and dragon are because they're the most popular monster adventurers want to beat and thus the ones he'd hear about the most. He repeatedly can't remember what an ogre is despite dropping an ocean on one, nor the dark elf or troll, and I think last volume he needed a long minute to remember what giant rats are. No surprise he can't remember what the Loch Ness Monster's name was in this book, or what an elephant is. Mokele Mubenbe. It's hard for me to even pronounce that.

Lizard Priest was in the process of bringing each of the nuns upstairs into the chapel from the basement storehouse. “Stay strong, now. When dawn breaks, we can take you somewhere less upsetting.” “Thank you... Truly...” “Think nothing of it. We may revere different deities, but monkeys came from lizards, in the end. That makes us cousins.” “Heh-heh... You lizardmen...say the strangest...things...”

I don't say this often enough but Lizard Priest is just kind of the best, you know? He's like a big, scaly, green teddy bear. He's a very comforting presence and such an easy person for everyone, including those of different faiths like Priestess and the elves, to be friends with.

At first I was disappointed Priestess didn't get a cure poison miracle, given how often goblins come at the party using poisoned weapons, but her Purify miracle has certainly proved its usefulness, both for cleaning water and air as well as helping psychologically by cleaning up the victims of the goblins. Doesn't restore their stolen virginity but at least leaves less marks and filth for them to be constantly reminded what the goblins did to them. Plus, Goblin Slayer is no stranger to using smoke or poison gas, so Purify is probably good to have on hand to keep such methods from harming the party themselves.

In the middle of this flood of stories, Goblin Slayer said, “So this is your home.” “That’s right.” “That’s good.” “Well—” High Elf Archer’s eyes narrowed like a smiling cat’s. “It’s where my heart is.” Goblin Slayer nodded. Cow Girl blinked at him for a moment. Then he said, “And there are goblins near it.” The note of anger in his voice was unmistakable.

I love all the members of the party, so naturally I'm enjoying all the bonding moments between Goblin Slayer and High Elf Archer in this book, as well as the parallels he keeps drawing between them, especially in regards to their sisters. Their interactions are fun because their personalities contrast so much but in a different way than his and Priestess' or her and Dwarf Shaman's.

Then she went on, “Actually, even a lot of elvish adventurers act like that, especially if they’ve just left the forest.” It’s not that they have no sense of danger, just a poor grasp of scale.

That last bit is a good way of describing a lot of this series. There are people ignorant of how truly dangerous the goblins can be but outside of porcelain ranks it's usually not deliberately so. They just live in a world of other insanely large threats that don't like being ignored, with the elves in particular having members of their species whom lived through the old battles of the gods. Goblins are basically pests and goblin slaying pest control. They're a problem but barely a blip on the radar when you're comparing them to freaking Sauron, whom it feels like you just recently finally got rid of.

There is something absolutely hilarious to me that this man in dirty leather and steel armor, coated in faded red stains, who refuses to ever take his helmet off, barely talks, frequently walks in a manner that's described as violent, and who's sole obsession it is to wipe out every last goblin in existence, is known as The Kindest Man on the Frontier. But I still love it because it makes sense. Most villages on the frontier can't get help with their goblin problems because there's not a lot of fame or money in killing goblins and bigger threats are given more the priority, so they're just left on their own. But then Goblin Slayer comes in, doing the job without any thought to reward or praise. He's saved god knows how many kidnapped women prevented the destruction of countless villages. From the outside, yeah, it looks like just simple kindness. Get to know him a little better and you see that it's obsession. And when you get as close as Priestess and Cow Girl, you agree that it's kindness.

It's so cool that the elf adventurer the party saved on their first quest together made a reappearance, even if it's a small one. Like with Wizard's little brother wanting to avenge her, it's good to show that the people brutalized by the goblins aren't just props to show how serious the situation is. They're real (albeit fictional) people, who had their own lives and people who loved them, so having them still matter later in the story and them trying to get at least some closure is good writing.

I was talking with someone before in my vol. 6 post that something I really like about Goblin Slayer's character is his immaturity. Not that he's whiny and bratty like a kid but rather his trauma stunted him in a few ways. He likely had nothing to do with his village being attacked by goblins but to this day he blames himself for what happened to his sister, from him hiding and doing nothing to save her to in this volume believing she would have long moved on from their village if she didn't have to take care of him. Taking on all that blame and guilt, it's such a childish way of thinking and his trauma (and Burgler's training) meant he never was able to grow out of it. I can just see that little boy under the floorboards, thinking everything that's happening around him is some divine punishment from the gods for something bad he did, like not listening to his sister or getting mad at Cow Girl or literally anything else a kid would normally do.

This world has freaking elevators?! What?! When they first mentioned it I thought it was going to be something involving water or magic or gears, but no! Control panels, keypad, entering a code. It even goes bong when it arrives at its destination. I mean, they say it's not clear whether it operates magically or mechanically but this still feels like a big jump in this world's technology level, considering the most high tech thing I remember prior was ice cream making, and that was a chemical process. I just love the image of Goblin Slayer's party patiently waiting in the elevator as it's going up and soft muzak is playing.

By the time he noticed the change, it was too late. The goblin shaman’s blood had been turned to pure water.

WHOA! Priestess! What the f**k?! Was this her version of strangling the goblin champion with a bundle of hair?! That was awesome!

Also not good for her, given her beliefs. It's a good little conflict for her character and sets up some worry about what'll happen if she does something like this again. The Earth Mother spoke directly to her to warn this was a one-time deal. Would Priestess lose the ability to use Miracles or would the goddess outright smite her for such gross abuse of the powers she gave her? There's also the added conflict that Goblin Slayer praised her for what she did. He's not as important as the Earth Mother but he's still someone Priestess respects and is attached to more than anyone else, so she's going to be conflicted if his life is on the line again.

I've never played DOOM. Still love the reference with Hero.

...Is that why there was an elevator? Is this world some odd combination of DnD, Lord of the Rings, and DOOM?

Even though they showed his image, with everyone else all dressed up for the wedding I'm enjoying imagining Goblin Slayer in his normal armor, just with the addition of a bow tie.

Damn that bouquet tease. Who caught it?! Priestess?! Cow Girl?! Sword Maiden leaping in through the window?!

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/GoblinSlayer/comments/fzwykz/read_through_light_novel_vol_7_random_thoughts/

[pendragonfics]

History

Paring: Aragorn/Reader

Tags: gender neutral reader, no pronouns used, modern character in Middle Earth, slice of life, ancient history, Otzi (The Iceman), storytelling, romantic fluff, fluff

Summary: Tell me a piece of your history that you're proud to call your own Speak in words you picked up as you walked through life alone

A slow evening with Aragorn.

Word Count: 1,122

Current Date: 2020-12-16

In the crux of afternoon and evening, the world often slowed itself to the same passage of time of those who did not observe it. The people who meandered through life, or spent their nights in a daydream. The other type was you; a companion of the great Strider himself, the adventurer Aragorn, and friend of the fellowship. Over time, you had grown closer with all the time apart, and now as the day slowed its decent to the gloaming, you were closer once more. Aragorn had bathed in a nearby stream, and whilst he did so, you sat at the edge of the camp. As you sit, an abandoned book in hand, you watch Legolas and Gimli as they watch Boromir mock-fight with the Hobbits. The elf and dwarf had seemed to warm up to one another, as time wore their grievances to stubs.

Deep in your thoughts, you hardly noticed as Aragorn arrived at your perch, albeit, there was a certain musk that in your travels was wholly his. At least, if you were snuck on by anyone, you would know by their scent. Before you could become distracted by the concept, you turned to Aragorn, meeting your eyes with his gaze.

“Feel better?” You ask.

He nods, and quietly, bunkers down beside you. He lays his head upon your lap, his long legs curled in as if he were a kitten or a child. If you didn’t know him better, you would assume he was always this way; and yet, you knew from experience that this trust was earned. You cast the forgotten book aside, and fingers free, set to work on the tangled head of hair before you.

Aragorn hums in comfort. “You have not spoken of your realm, of late,” he prompts, your fingers unknotting the tangles from the days’ ride. “Your stories…they are most fantastical.”

You raise a brow. “I thought I told you that this world was the fantastic one,” you tease. Exhaling, you pause at your ministrations, contemplating for a moment. “Then again, I think you’d think all the technology and fashions are mind-boggling.”

From where he’s perched, you watch as Aragorn tilts his head toward the sky. But no matter how far his neck reaches, his gaze does not meet yours. Learning this, he feeds a hand from his side toward one of your motionless ones and runs a thumb over it.

“We have spoken of the governance and history of your land…” Aragorn frowns. His hand squeezes yours, ever so lightly, a plea alongside his verbal one, “Tell me another story, _________.”

“I thought you would be tired after today’s ride,” you comment, leaning to kiss the hand holding yours, “and I told you, I’ve got no more stores. I’ve told you all of the recent histories from before I arrived here.”

He responds almost instantaneously. “Yes, recent history,” Aragorn hums. “Tell me of the past, of times long gone. Where did your people come from?” There is a sensation in your chest, deep within your body. It is below your collar, below your sternum. It cannot be your heart beating faster, as while you are in the presence of Aragorn, it is always that way. “What did they do?”

“Well,” you start, “where I am from, all of us are human. Man is what you call it here. But despite that, we are spread far across the world, with different cultures and languages and attitudes.” With your unbound fingers, you feed them once more into his hair, pulling it from his forehead. Aragorn shifts comfortably under your touch, and uninterrupted, you continue, “and whether or not we understand one another, through action or by word, I think that we are all the same. Just people.”

“That’s not a story,” Aragorn objected.

“Well then, Lord Strider,” you hum, “I better get to it.”

“This story is about the man found in the ice, on the Italian-Austrian mountains. We don’t know his name, but from now on, I’ll call him Ötzi. Now, he lived years and years ago, back when humankind was still learning how to harness the wilds of the world for their own innovation — and because we’re complicated with the timeline of ancient history, this was 3350 BCE, or 5369 years ago.”

“That is long ago,” Aragorn murmured.

“Ötzi was forty-six years old and found in the ice almost thirty years ago. The people who found the body did research into it; because of their technology, and the fact he was preserved on the mountain, most of him was intact, and they began to make their discoveries. Later, they dug near where they found him and found his things. I think it was a hat, a longbow…oh! And string, too.”

“A five thousand-year-old man, still on the mountain he died on,” Aragorn whispered, amazed. “What did they find?”

“From memory, Ötzi was quite tattooed, and they found his last meal preserved in his belly. But they realised that he had not died on the mountain because of the elements; he had been struck down. There was part of an arrowhead here, in his shoulder,” you slip your hand from his, and move to where you remember your lecturer pointing it out on the slides.

Aragorn stilled at the touch.

“…another dig took place, to find any more of Ötzi’s belongings. It was then they found a knife, deeper than where they found him; as if when he died, it was too far for him to reach to defend himself.”

“A warrior who strikes those without a weapon is no warrior at all,” he muttered. “Your Ötzi died a hero’s death.”

“That was the thing, Aragorn,” you say, “his knife was special. According to the timeline of ancient history, the technology at the time was a mix of copper and tin. But his weapon was iron. That was a rare metal at the time; so rare, that the time period named after it happened many years after Ötzi died.” You bite your lip, unsure how to make the story sound uplifting, considering the grimness of it, and the desolation of the quest to Mordor, but nevertheless, you prevail. “Whoever killed him knew that he had a precious thing.”

“And his name lives on, thousands of years after his passing,” Aragorn whispered.

He shifted once more for comfort, and, with a deep breath, he reached once more for your hands, to hold you close, to hold you tight. It wasn’t like the other times anyone had held you; when he did, it was mutual; whilst he held you for his own reasons, equally, you held him. Because perhaps if you did so, tight enough, the moment would last a little longer.

[irondadbigbang]

IronDad Big Bang 2019 Masterlist

Masterlist below the cut! Or read on AO3.

Baby Bird by WhimsicalEthnographies @whimsicalethnographies

Peter stares at the envelope, sitting in the middle of his work table, in his little corner, in Mr. Stark’s lab. He’d been checking the mail as soon as he gets home from school and pulled it out before May got home, which won’t be until after nine o’clock. And there it was, finally, the envelope adorned with Massachusetts Institute of Technology, gray and maroon across the white paper.

art by ulzyuu

Castle on a Cloud by CaptainStarSong @captainstarsong

“How the Hell am I supposed to help some kid when half the time my own life is crashing and burning,” Tony asked, incredulous that Fury was thinking that he could possibly take care of some little boy that he didn’t even know. There was a reason why Tony’s life was practically always falling a part, why the closest people around him either died or left him. It wouldn’t be fair to bring some kid into the mix of his crazy life, especially after Afghanistan. 

Fury took a deep breath as looked at Tony with a hint of pity. “Because, Tony, his name is Peter and he’s your son.” 

Or in which SHIELD finds a young and hurt Peter after raiding a HYDRA base, and Tony must learn how to become the father Peter needs.

art by eve-valution

Casualty of the Darkness by kianisabitch @kianisabitch

Peter remembers when they used to cuddle or simply curl up together and listen to each other’s heartbeats. They used to be the perfect couple. Alex would bring him milkshakes when he had a bad day, he always came to Peter’s science fairs and he even let the boy sleep over at his house whenever May had a night shift at the hospital (which was more often than not at this point due to a single paycheck never being enough to support their small family). But slowly, Alex stopped doing those thing. It started with him forgetting to bring Peter milkshakes when his eyes were red rimmed or anxiety attacks shook through his bed like a hurricane, but quickly morphed into daily insults and verbal abuse and then backhands to the face when he was angry or hands grabbing him too hard and finally the violent sex he was now so used to. Sometimes he missed how their relationship used to be. But the good times were a thing of the past and there was no use mourning what he no longer had. 

OR 

Peter is stuck in a highly abusive situation and Tony starts uncovering the truth in order to save the spiraling teenager.

Damaged At Best (Like You’re Already Figured Out) by JolinarJackson @jolinarjackson

”Don’t come any closer,” Spider-Man said, his hand raised threateningly, his fingers resting against a trigger mechanism nestled into his palm. 

”Alright,” Tony answered. For a moment, they looked at each other – Tony stuck to the wall on one side of the alley and Spider-Man stuck to the other – then Tony opened his helmet to show his face. 

”Hey, there”, he said. ”Nice to finally meet you.” 

— 

The Avengers are left shaken in the aftermath of the Sokovia Accords. With half the team under house arrest at the Compound, Tony finds himself seeking refuge in Avengers Tower and starts forming a tentative friendship with the neighborhood vigilante Spider-Man. A friendship which is quickly threatened by Secretary Ross doubting Spider-Man’s intentions and integrity. 

Tony is left wondering who to trust, especially when Spider-Man manages to uncover the one secret Tony never wanted anyone to know about: the child Tony had with a woman named Mary Fitzpatrick sixteen years ago.

art by @shoyzz-art

Dreams Like Ashes by Captainkirkmccoy @captainkirkmccoy

Tony Stark may not know the danger he’s unleashing on himself, his team and his kid by reworking the old plans for the PASIV/Dream sharing project his father sold to the military, but he does have the best intentions. Irondad Big Bang.

How The Mighty Fall by Meep_Morp @gayspiderboy

Since his duel against Toomes on Coney Island, Peter’s life has settled down considerably. May knows about his double life and accepts it (mostly). Tony has welcomed him back, and given him more independence as New York’s Spider-Man. 

One night during patrol he crosses paths with Connor, a teenager who has Extremis in his blood and answers to the wrong kind of people. Though Tony is quick to distrust him, Peter finds himself reluctant to follow his mentor’s lead, and a bond develops between the two boys. Their relationship is further complicated when Connor’s former master, Negative, makes it a personal mission to destroy them both in his quest for power. 

Taking down a superpowered psychopath? Tough, but Peter isn’t going to back down. 

Stopping Tony from blasting his first potential boyfriend into space? He might need a miracle for that.

If You Could See Me Now by geekymoviemom @geekymoviemom

New York City is bracing itself for the worst hurricane to hit in over thirty years, and the kid isn’t back yet. 

Light by funnygirlthatbelle13 @funnygirlthatbelle

Tony Stark has given up. While the other heroes are in Wakanda trying to figure out a plan, he drinks to forget in New York. But when he discovers tickets to Next to Normal; a rock musical about mental illness, grief, the misuse and abuse of drugs, and parents recovering after the death of their child; that he and Peter had bought, he is forced to face his worst fears all over, and learn that, despite everything he’s been through, there may still be light.

Look Over Your Shoulder, I’ll Be There by Colourcodedbinders @colourcodedbinders

It starts as a simple enough gag: see how long he can manage to keep sneaking into Avengers Tower with his friends before Tony Stark notices. But when an unexpected gaggle of men wearing identical ugly navy blue suits and driving around in equally hideous blue cars join the mix, controlled by a guy with horrific fashion sense and the strength of twenty pumas, Peter has to suit up and do what he does best: superhero the hell out of it. 

And if it ends up being the hardest, scariest, most unplanned thing he’s ever had to do? Well then that’s no one’s business but his. (And Tony’s. Definitely also Tony’s.)

Radioactive by Emily_F6 @justme--emily

Things haven’t always been great between Tony Stark and his son. He wasn’t ready to become a father…didn’t even know he had a son until the boy’s mother died. Over time, though, he thought he got the hang of it. But that was before his son went on a field trip to Oscorp and was seemingly left fighting for his life.

Sea Spider by Bean_reads_fanfic @the-reverse-mermaid

“Tell me I’m not the only one seeing this,” Tony prompts, gesturing to their catch. 

It’s a kid. A teenager, by the looks of him, no more than 15 or 16, with curling brown hair plastered over his forehead and eyes. He lays there prone on his side, covered in cuts- some shallow, some deep, all of them most likely caused by the barbs on the fishnet. Tony can just make out blood matted on the back of his head- he probably hit it on the side of the boat and got himself knocked out. Clinging to his torso is a soaked, faded t-shirt and below that… 

…below that, his lower body is a tail. A full-on fish tail. 

(Mer!Peter AU)

Sometimes, a Family Is by CrystalRoza19 & NeonCrayons

Sometimes a family is comprised of you, your recently divorced dad, an unruly group of teenagers and a semi-unemployed former world-class neurosurgeon… 

Peter Stark hoped that moving back to the city would help his father get passed all the struggles and animosity that plagued him after his divorce. What he hadn’t thought to hope for was a way for his father to move on; he’d always had a hard time letting people go, after all. 

Stephen Strange was everything Steve Rogers was not. Maybe he could be everything Tony Stark needed to heal his broken heart. Throw in an unruly group of teenagers and you have yourself a family.

turn back the clock (and I’ll try again in the morning) by madasthesea @madasthesea

Peter gets stuck in a time loop. In it, he lives through some of his worst nightmares, only to wake up that morning and have no one remember. He needs Tony to help him get through. 

And if that isn’t bad enough, his identity is revealed over and over, every day.

art by @the-reverse-mermaid & starlight-sparks

VERENDUS by Lorein_nur 

New York 1935, Trish Parker was on her way to deliver a letter when all hell broke loose on the busy streets. Due to fates twisted sense of humor she found herself caught in the middle of a mafia disspute, if a stray bullet doesn’t kill her May sure as hell would.

art by @hereandnowwearealive

We’ve Made It This Far, Kid by EmAndFandems @jlmarch

Tony’s just trying to protect the kid from SHIELD. Why does everything have to be so hard? 

Meanwhile, Peter’s biggest problem is buying movie tickets, until he gets a harsh awakening.

[carnal-lnstinct]

Conton City Lockdown

Summary: Time patrollers have returned from missions carrying an unknown disease and infecting others denizens of Conton City with it, forcing Trunks and Supreme Kai of Time to shut down most operations and training around the City and drastically limit missions for a while until they can get everything under control. Everyone is instructed to stay inside their assigned domiciles until further notice. "Who knows what that could do to the timeline if Patrollers pass it on during a mission?!" Supreme Kai of Time urges Conton. The Conton City Hero has also been quarantined with her current Master, Goku much to both their dismay as there was still so much training left. What other shenanigans can the two saiyans get themselves into while being all cooped up.

Word Count: 6,013 (Chapter 3) AO3 Rating: Explicit / Mature Warning: nsfw ( smut, explicit language )  A/N:  I actually booted up Xenoverse 2 again to get a bit more idea what to do with this chapter. I tell myself I don't want long chapters since this is a short one-shot, but I couldn't bring myself to pass on the details here. Hope its worth it!

Chapter 3

Days were really starting to  feel blended together now. With Conton city running on 24 hour daylight, the week's time that passed felt like one extremely long day. By the grace of the technological advancements here were you able to track the time and days. That and the daily scheduled check in from the robotic clerks of Conton. The second most physical presence you were able to get now.

You finally awoke on the sofa feeling lighter than you remember when falling asleep. The heavier figure of the wild haired man was nowhere to be found around you. You opened your eyes to find you were alone in the living room, no immediate sounds being made until the faint hints of water sloshing around behind a door hit your ears. Relieved to still sense the passive ki of your fighting master, it wasn't completely gratifying to wake up without him. Again.  For two people sleeping together, you and Goku never actually slept together. All the times he fell asleep before you, you left him to his peace and went to your bedroom alone along with him never failing to make an effort of relocating you to your room when you would fall asleep around him or are left barely lucid from your rumps. It all comes to you foggy, but you know he does it with such care and tenderness, the way he places you in your bed and tucking the blanket around you before departing to his designated sleeping space. This time though, you insisted he not to do that. Even going so far as commandeering the couch he slept on. You wanted to stay with him for the whole night at least once. Having stretched yourself out along the sofa messily decorated with a spare blanket and pillow, you patted your chest invitingly with your persistent charm knowing he could not deny it. You left him no choice but to crawl onto you and rest his head against your breasts. You still remember the length of his arms stretching around you to snuggle to his comfort, his torso between your legs and how comically his feet hung off the edge of the chair. And the weight of all his muscles on you.  He seemed to become heavier the longer you stayed that way until you drifted off like a weighted blanket you never knew you needed. A brief moment where you slightly stirred from your sleep was content to still feel him wrapped around you and shifted against the weight of him for more, needing more of him around you and drifted off once again with a hand lost in his hair and another hanging around his shoulders.

It would appear he couldn't wait to get this "new day" started, the saiyan male already washing up and would be expecting breakfast to follow soon after. Come to think of it, you haven't taken a decent bath yourself since the day before yesterday and you slowly remember why.

Yesterday with little convincing, you talked  Goku into following you outside to the rooftop area of your building for just a small, quick spar to keep the muscles loose. No transforming, no ki blasts, no charging your energy. Just a small practice of physical skill and technique, something that barely counted as a work out between trained saiyans such as yourselves. But something was better than nothing. It was almost eerie how quiet the large city was with only the sound of the robotic clerks working away at various tasks,but the way the sun hit you skin roused you up for the risk. Sadly it didn't take long for the small training session to draw one of their attention. The robotic voice calmly urging the both of you to go back inside per its protocol, however was immediately cut off by the sharp pierce of the familiar, old yell from your former mentor.

"Have you lost your marbles!?" The Elder Kai's vocals startling you and rattling the machine itself, shouting from the robot's speakers. "We are in a state of emergency! How dare you of all people not heed the warnings of your elders! How reckless!! Shameful!! Get your tuckus back inside or I will suspend you from any Quests! Permanently!"

Usually the old man's berating didn't phase you by much, but the thought of never going on a time patrol again wracked your core as a chilling fact of his power. Well, not his power but what the Supreme Kai of Time would do if or when she found out. You wasted no time teleporting out of there the moment you recover from your shock, leaving the confused Goku behind who immediately followed after your ki once he detected you back inside. The poor robotic clerk left to heal from the voice rattling it.

Suffice to say, getting caught really shook you up more than you could have expected. More than fighting the powered up Mira or even an angry Beerus. And though you hoped it wouldn't, it did get to the Supreme Kai of Time whose lecturing stung worse. She sounded more understanding and approached the situation more openly than the old man but the guilt certainly sat in your chest all the same. Back inside your living quarters, the conversation between you and the two Kais over your communicator ends with you being reminded of the current danger and the lack of grasp on their ends to plan a counterattack accordingly. Isolation wasn't the best option, but it was all they had so far that kept the strange disease from passing around, even sharing worry of it being anything like the virus that had attacked Goku across the timelines. Supreme Kai of Time made a passing thought that they would be in need of you very soon as well, rousing hope in you again. The Kais didn't waste time questioning Goku's presence either as he watched over your shoulder through the whole thing. You immediately answered vaguely, leaving it as him simply stopping by to train, a true fact a week ago, but since he was already here you could stand the company and he was eager to help where needed as well. That had set the tone for the rest of the day, prompting your dispirited heart to submit to whatever comfort the larger saiyan gave you by simply being there. Even just a cuddle to sleep.

With all of that flooding back into your mind, you sighed and figured it was time you prepared for the day as well, holding out hope you would be summoned to the Time Nest and anxious that maybe you would be left waiting longer as punishment. Heading into your bedroom to choose some comfy clothes to change into after your bath, an old duffel bag catches your eye as you went through your closet. It's familiar, of course, but its contents are a mystery. You hadn't used this bag since you first entered the Time Patrol Academy. Inside, you find an old scouter, your first scouter, and the old, blue bodysuit you used to wear under your armor. Made of the familiar saiyan-grade material. A nostalgic glance between the two items rushes you with a feeling of worry all over again from the Kais words replaying in your head. But Supreme Kai of Time did say soon.. You can only continue to try to remain optimistic.

Until then...an idea pops into your head, that scoundrel grin rising into your features.

Goku is settled into the tub that fit his entire body better than the small couch he was had been resting on for the week, the hot water and space around him gives such a relief to his body. He gave a light stretch before submerging himself further, knees rising out of the water but a knock at the door catches his attention.

"Oh Kakarot." He hears your voice a few moments later and turns his head toward the unlocked door. "Are you hiding from me in there?" Your tone is playful and calm, but he doesn't think twice about it.

"Not at all, did ya need something?" He answers, unaware of what was awaiting him beyond the door.  You press the button sliding the door open, the bathroom light revealing your form to the half submerged saiyan. Your tail is slowly swaying behind you as you stand there with a hand on your cocked hips and the other braced on the doorway to give you an imposing and suggestive stance. Wrapped around your upper body is the blue suit alone, clinging tightly to your curves and purposely left raised around your thighs to expose them more where they connected to your ass. You purposely left yourself bare underneath the whole thing. Your feet and hands were fitted into the old white boots and matching large white gloves. And of course, the scouter is affixed to your ear to complete the look.

"Hey, Earth man." You greet him in your most sultry tone while attempting to come off as a threat, loosely wrapping your tail around your hips.  "I'm here to conquer you..and then take your magical balls all for myself. What are you going to do about it, huh?" Goku's eyes lift, mesmerized by the appearance of you but not for the reason you had hoped for.  "Oh, wow you have one of those power reading thingies. You look like Vegeta when he first came to Earth." He pointed at you, naivety on full display.

'That was hardly a compliment', you thought, the permanent scowl on the Prince's face flashing through your mind.

You try to play that off and raise your head to increase your look of intimidation and to keep the focus on your goal, giving him a sly smirk as you pressed the scouter button to activate it. The equipment pings and starts to reads his passive energy. "That's right, Kakarot. I'm a saiyan, after all. And according to my scouter...You're gonna be a howling mess after I pound you into the ground. Begging me to finish you off. What d'ya have to say to that?" You tease, giving him an expected look to pick up on.

Goku sits up in the water and leans against the edge of the tub as he tilts his head at you, blinking. "I think your scouter is broken, you know it's going to take a lot more training before you're able to beat me." You visibly cringe at his answer.

"--I KNOW!" You shot back, nerve scratched. Immediately you curse under your breath having openly admitted that. "I'm trying to flirt with you, ya dolt! I've been trying for 2 days now!" You huff and throw your hands up in defeat. "Forget it! Just hurry up so I can take a bath!" You storm out of the doorway snatching the scouter from your ear. As the door closes behind you, the sound of Goku calling after you to wait grows quiet as you go back into your bedroom. Throwing the scouter onto the bed you start muttering to yourself as you return to your previous task of looking for something to settle around the house again. You start to hear the bathroom door open and the heavy steps coming up fast, the dripping wet Saiyan making his way into the room with his right hand holding the towel closed around his waist.

"H-hey! I'm sorry! I-I didn't realize-!" He stutters nervously over his words as you shoot him a glare, silencing him.

"Save it! We've been at this for a week already and you still don't get it. I could wear a sign that read 'Hey Kakarot! Shove your dick inside me until I pass out again' and you would still be dense to what it means!"

"P-Please just hear me out. You know as well as I do this is all still new to me. I don't mean to make you mad but c-can you really be that surprised about i-"

"I CAN, YOU JACKASS!" You yell, stomping your way over to him as he stumbles back against the wall and you shake a gloved fist at him. "How many more times we have to do it before it gets through your thick head?! You'd pick up on me going to the kitchen for any reason at all if it got you food better than me spreading my legs in your face! GET WITH IT, KAKAROT!" You growl, your energy peaking visibly as the clear aura wrapped around you, blowing your wild saiyan hair into a frenzy. You're not as frustrated at this vicious cycle you keep going through with him and flirting, trying to play subtle and coy in getting his attention. No, it was more of everything else going on around you two.

"Easy! I will, I promise!" The larger saiyan pleaded mercy for your calm to return, a single hand up in defense of you as he felt all the more vulnerable dripping wet and barely holding the towel around his hips. Regaining your wits at his demeanor, you realized what you were doing and backed down. Your ki settles back down to your base level.

"No..." You sigh heavily, giving his wet chest a ginger pat over to better show you're harmlessness.  "You're doing fine. Just..." You didn't want to come off as a bully, especially to one of the strongest warrior you know while he's naked. You begin to feel you may be shoving him out of his comfort zone despite how well received your advances do tend to go with him. Whatever this is between you two, something you still need to address.  "Never mind. I'm just.. frustrated with everything else going on and I'm unfairly taking it out on you." You admit, placing your hands on your hips and turning away as you pouted with lightly dusted cheeks. "I-I'm big enough to admit that.. Just thought.. Maybe I needed a distraction from it all for a bit, but that's not your problem. I-I'm...S-sorry..."

Goku recovers, reading your change in energy beyond you lowering your power level. Better than he has picked up on most things around you lately, but to be fair he has been improving on noticing some things beyond that of a direct kiss to the lips or an obvious frown he couldn't fix with his ever encouraging words. He too remembers the old man's lecture of you basically almost being out of the job for what you two did outside and the following disapproval of the Supreme Kai of Time pretty much offering the same consequence should you go off without order again. All of that for just a little training? He gets why, but for all you've done they could have been less harsh. It's not easy for saiyans to sit still for too long. It clicks that he should know--does know-- you a little better now in this small time together than he has in all of the time you spent training from the day he first took you on as his pupil. Your job as a time patroller has been your life for a long time now, to not do it or anything that has to do with it was like taking away your reason for fighting. For training, to become stronger.  All of his efforts to one day make a powerful and tough opponent out of you to challenge for real would be for nothing. Even now you back down from him and apologize in your own way for yelling at him. That was a first. Admittedly, he admires that unyielding fire in you.  Goku finally understands that you don't feel good, but you're trying to. He should have realized by the sudden appearance of you in the saiyan costume that you were up to something to lift your spirit and tag him along for the fun. What kind of Training Master had he been to not realize his pupil was so deeply troubled? He...He's going to fix it.

"You're right." The larger saiyan nods, you glance over your shoulder to look at him. "I must be foolish to not see it sooner... Right, then." He laugh softly, quickly he adjusts the towel around his waist with a small knot and places his hands on the sides of his face giving an overly dramatic look of terror. "Oooh nooo! It is a saiyan from another planet coming to destroy me!"

Your brow quirks at this sudden display and you turn around to find him dropping down on his knees with his head lowered, bowing down to you in this animated fashion to accent his downright hammy performance. "Please don't destroy my planet, oh evil one! Take me instead!"

Unbelievable. You snort and break into a laugh. "Kakarot, no.  You don't have to do this. It's okay."

"Oh yeah?" He lifts his head up with a wink and leaps up, putting space between you both and takes on his fighting stance. "Because I am not Kakarot! I am Goku, the saiyan from earth and defender of its people! I will defeat you, evil saiyan!" He smirks, immediately transforming into his super saiyan form. The aura washing over the room and leaves the pale gold color of hair and azure eyes "glaring" back at you.

You blink at him, body stirred by the sudden appearance of his super saiyan form. Lifting your hands from your hips you slowly take a fighting stance of your own. "Goku, 'defender of earth' huh?" You repeat grinning as well, the similar shade of blue replacing the black hue of your eyes as the golden glow burst out around your body.  "Not when I'm done with you. I'm going to put you on your back, Earth boy."

"Not if I put you on yours first."

You didn't expect that, but you would be lying if you said it didn't immediately excite you. The space around you is small but you waste no time jumping forward with a ready fist to punch at him. He blocks you with his forearm and as you come at him again with your off hand, punch denied again by a raised knee.

You're both holding back, but the loose items around you are rattling on their surfaces from the force of your moves alone. You continue going at him, picking up the pace with your half-hearted punches. Goku remaining ever elusive to your increasing speed, movements blurring to the naked eye. Your hands collide together, feet braced on the floor as you pushed against each other in this playful display of strength. Fingers laced, the electric blue of your eyes boring into one another as sparks of rogue energy began to race in between your hold and around each of your knuckles.  It was amazing how you were both barely giving  any effort worth bragging about but still managed to produced such energy, this vortex of power appearing around you and the vibrations shaking the entire place. You can start to feel energy tingling, grow erratic between your palms, this making you both quickly draw back before it escalated into something more wild and destructive to your room.

You could only look at each other through the gap of empty space between you now as the feeling of that energy still tingles against your skin but starting to fade. A silent exchange between your stares and your smile fades, Goku withdrawing from his fighting pose to stand at his tallest. Together, you let go of you super saiyan forms to return to base level, your breath trembles on exhale at the release of power. Goku treads across the floor to you and you come to meet him without hesitation, colliding together once more but in a furious exchange of kisses and hands pulling anywhere they can grab. You left no space between you with hands settling around his torso to hold him closer  and his cradling your head in his large hands, leaving little chance for you to catch your breath.  His skin already felt dry against your grip, most likely from the rising heat of his body upon transforming and you can smell the fragrant soap emanating from it's surface. The rough hands you would normally find around the small of your back by now clung to the back of your exposed thighs as you were lifted up in a single, effortless motion,  propping your legs around his waist. This demeanor of his is different. Where you normally the lead, you find yourself following his actions, your legs looping at the ankles around him without thought.

Suddenly the wall is slam against your back, your hands pulled from his waist and held back by each side of your head.  You gasp in a deep breath, chest continuing to heave for air  as your surprised eyes looked up into the larger male's darker, commanding gaze. You feel your heart going wild in your chest, feeling smaller than you were under his eyes.  "Promise to stop terrorizing my planet ...and I won't let you suffer." Goku brusque "warning" leaves your jaw hanging, only a resigned whimper betraying you when he pressed closer to you. "Got it?"

You collect your thoughts and swallow, raising your head to give the impression of looking down your nose at him. "Make me." you dared, managing to smirk again. "I can take anything you throw at me, earthling." You try to sound tough, but you hoped he would do just that. Anything. Once more your body betrays you as your thighs twitch around his hips in excitement for what's to come now.

He smirks back at you, "I figured you'd say that." You feel your back leave the wall but your hands still bound by his larger pair, more and more your lower body grows enticed to this authoritative motion. In no means were you so much weaker you couldn't shake yourself free of him, more so you were eager to see where he intends to go with this. You almost didn't want to fight back. Even his energy feels different to you. It is nothing like the passive ki you sensed when he was in the bath tub. Your eyes never leave his and you feel your collective weight fall into the mattress of your bed. Goku releases your hands finally and trace over the skin tight material down to your sides where he proceeds to mercilessly tickle at you beneath him. He has you trapped, your legs still around him and his body so close to you limiting any means to escape it.

You let out a holler of laughs, twisting violently beneath him and pulling whatever your hands could grab that would help you pull yourself free. "Ka- Kakarot I'll k-kill you...f-for this!" You managed to shriek out between your fits of uncontrolled laughter.  

"You should have accepted surrender!" Goku teases, giving you a shit-eating grin.  Your legs fall from his hips as you dig your booted heels against the bed to try to push away to no avail. He continues his assault, hands too strong and too quick to beat away. The most you could manage to do was twist around to your stomach and attempt to crawl while batting your tail at him.

"C'mon, say 'uncle'!"

"You a-ass! Th-This isn't f-fair!" You body continued to convulse at the tickling and your words just seemed to grow more broken up in your cackles.

"Say it!"

"S-STOP!"

"I'll only stop if you say it!"

"F-Fine! UNCLE! U-UNCLE!"

The saiyan male liberates you from his attack, leaving you to lie there a panting, grinning shame. How could you not expect this from him? This big goof. "I'm sorry, it was too good a chance I couldn't pass it up!" He giggles at you from a benevolent place before that switch appeared to go off in his head again and that good-natured innocent saiyan you knew disappeared into a sinful gaze. "Now let's get serious." As if you weren't feeling limp enough, a pressure bears down around your tail, eyes shooting wide at the sharpness that overcame your entire body. Goku lets up on his grip at the base of your tail just enough to divert any pain, leaving only the lack of control of your limbs. He is all too familiar with what a tight grip could do and he doesn't want you to hurt, just doesn't want you trying to wiggle away again. "Guess you're not as big a conqueror as you thought. You haven't even trained your tail." He coos, patronizing you for your weakness. "Guess you're nothin' but a big bully."

"A-Are you out of your mind?! Let go!" You gripe at him, though left silenced with a small whimper when he gives a light tug and raises your hips to settle your lower body on your knees. With what strength left in your body holding you there, he lets up his grip again. Goku runs a finger of his free hand along the stretched fabric clinging to you where it contours to your warmth, clit twitching on contact. His stroking circles between your entrance  and your sensitive button making you bite your lip at the long awaited contact but  jerk your head back to look at him trying to focus on the fact he has your tail in his grasp. "H-hey! Do you hear me?!" You see his eyes lift to yours and his lips curve into an almost devilish countenance, turning his gaze to his finger's handiwork and the saturated line of moisture growing in its pattern.

"You said you could take anything I throw at you, right?" He asks continuing to toy with you, switching from his finger to his thumb as he narrowed his motion to your clothed clit. Your entire lower body jerks back against it, wanting to follow the motion but trying to hold control until he withdraws his limb when he realizes your resolve. "What was that you were saying earlier? You were going to put me on my back?" His husky voice goads you on. Knowing full well there wasn't much left you could do with your tail in his trained hand and your drenched button twitching from stimulation, you almost consider taking your words back in this game. You watch him shift behind you, carefully positioned on his own knees between your legs and hear his towel fall loose and land beside your head, earning your eyes. In place of his fingers now, you feel the head of his erect cock press against your clit, exciting it all the more through the fabric. You mewl at the contact, dropping your head into the mess of sheets of pillows and pushing your hips back against him for more. You can feel you insides practically opening up for him, ready to take him in if not for your damned suit! Goku laughs a little, "You just say when you're ready to give up and I'll end your suffering." How can he still sound so in control teasing you like this?! He must have been sizing you up for this the moment he triggered his super saiyan form, conniving every step and reading your responses for the proper approach. Let it never be said Goku's wiles were not up to par with getting what he wanted, especially when he was confident he was going to come out on top.

God Damn it, Kakarot.

The not so subtle rubs of him against your entrance but denied by your clothes taunted you further. He knows exactly what he's doing when he's into it, a lesson you would not have thought you would come to regret if he was going to tease you like this. You try to tell your body you can endure more of this, but your insides are begging to be filled with him.

"Well?"

"....I'll...yield..."  You relinquish your pride to your greedy, depraved core. You don't think you have ever been more turned on by him then you were right now. You regain control of your muscles once you feel all the pressure lift from your tail and it dangles at your side. A sigh of relief, you attempt to speak and lift yourself. "Kakarot, yo-", A keen shriek shoots from your throat when you feel the fabric pulled aside, exposing your moist privates, and how easily the head of his cock found its way inside, opening you up for the rest of him. Your entire core rattles with delight at the penetration. You should have known it was too good to be true. He was caving alongside you the whole time, waiting for your blessing to take you. Goku lets out a decadent groan as his length twitches feverish from the snug caress of your insides welcoming him, drawing himself in and out as he lets his control slip away.

"Took you long enough." He chokes back, stretching the fabric further away from your hole, his other hand guiding your hips back to suit his cock.

"J-Just shut up!" You still attempted to sound tough, though your voice was muffled by the sheet you had bitten down on as the pleasure ignited inside you. It already felt like you were edging towards your orgasm, you had to attempt to calm your overexcited nerves  enough to enjoy the full ride. How easily your body accepted his length this time left you almost breathless. Already you can feel his hips bouncing off your ass, driving your lower body back with just one of his hands to meet his thrusts. There was no holding it back now considering how much he stirred you up. Your insides squeeze him all at once as a strained, euphoric squeal falls out of your throat. His rhythm slows in response, groaning as your twitchy insides only seem to pull him in to the hilt and grow all the more hotter around him. You hold yourself against him as the head of his cock nudges at your deep spot, rubbing together in your languid movements.

The strong hands of the saiyan reaches over to your frame and draws you up to hold you into the contour of his muscles, your back resting against his chest as you readjust your legs to accommodate the position. Goku wastes no time pulling the stretchy fabric down your shoulder, kissing the revealed skin to his content. With the lightest twist of your torso, you turn to meet his lips, reaching behind his head and taking a handful of his hair. He begins to quicken the grind of his hips into you again, a steady flow of deep thrusts in this new position you immediately rock yourself into.

"That all you got?" You prod, coherent enough to still provoke this "punishment" worthy of planetary invasion. Though intense and more gripping than ones before, you've endure much more than a single orgasm from him. There was more to go before all the fight is taken out of either of you. You feel his lips spread into a grin against yours, clearly taking the bait.

"I can go all out." He shamelessly declares, a fact you're both aware of, thrive on. You were creating a debauched monster and you intended to delight in every minute of it.  Every moment he wraps you in his large arms and bears down on you to drive inch after inch into your core until it hurts, every curt and tactless word that falls out of his mouth inevitably reminding you of this carnal delicacy of a man who finds new ways to please you, every kiss..and beyond kissing. That alone stirred your arousal right back up. He wrestles control of your hips from you with both hands and begins plunging his cock against your spot again with enough momentum to knock you back into the sheets below. Each of your hands grip at the back of his head to anchor yourself from falling over, taking every bit of this lewd assault on your body with wanton sobs. "D-Don't..Don't stop!" You urged, attempting to bounce yourself back into his movements. Goku braces his forehead against the top of your skull, switching from holding your frame in his hands to wrapping his arms around your build and continuing to drive into you, rocking your entire body with a sharp and ungraceful cadence you could only interpret as his own orgasm creeping in. Your hold on his head grows stronger as your pleasure builds back up to the edge so soon, voice trembling. He lets out a tremulous groan behind you as he stills his hips inside you with a rough shove, hot cum gushing against the wild spasms of your insides. Deliriously you both ride out the shared euphoria until you sink further into his hold, these strong arms the only thing holding you up at the moment.

The larger saiyan leans against you, encouraging you to lie forward as his body follows, catching himself on his own hands and letting you slide off his expended cock before rolling over beside you. Your face is lost in a small bundle of sheets and pillows, body still quivering from it's ecstasy. You managed to turn your head towards him with a small gasp for air, the rise and fall of his chest as he draws for air making him look like he was worn out but you knew better. You extend a hand to touch face, turning his head to look at you. When your eyes meet you see a smile start to form in his features, that kindness returning to his eyes. At least until you narrow your eyes on him and slap your hand down across his cheek with the strength you could find from your exertion.  Goku lets out a yelp of "Ows" and holds the reddening side of his face, downright confused as he looks back at you.

"Ow, geez! What was that for?!"

"You grab my tail again... I'm pulling a new one out of you through your throat." You huff, lifting yourself up enough to crawl over and lie across his chest.  "Warn me before you do that next time."

"Y-Yeah.." He agrees, laughing as he continued to rub his cheek.

"U-Umm...Guys?" A voice emanates by your feet. You and Goku both look at each other in mirrored confusion before looking down to where the voice came from. By your feet you see only the old scouter barely hanging from the edge of the bed. A couple of voices come through, all turning your face a ghostly white as you stared at it wide-eyed. That's right, you never turned the scouter off. It was old but it was the exact some one you wore at the time Elder Kai scouted you for that special mission. The very one you synced with the systems of the Time Nest so the Kais, Trunks and His partner could communicate with you while out on a mission. You're pretty sure your heart just stopped in your chest.

"T-...Trunks?!" You answer hesitantly. The half saiyan responds in a tone similar to yours, wishing he could hide away from the things he heard but its clear now that you were all aware of each other now and everything that transpired between the communicators since you pressed that power button.

"I-I didn't mean to interrupt! J-Just thought you should know Supreme Kai of Time requests for you. Uh, whenever she and my partner can revive the Elder Kai," Trunks manages to report, ever embarrassed. Somewhere in the Time Nest lay the fainted elder kai with a heated face and a drip of blood hanging from his nose., Supreme Kai of Time and the former Toki Toki city hero doing their best to bring the elder back to consciousness.

Your brain is still trying to process what this was going to mean for you, but Goku began to laugh sheepishly, holding a hand to his head. "Well this is gonna be awkward, isn't it?"

[crusherthedoctor]

The beach trope: another one that often comes early in Sonic's quests, and this one's no different, though expectations are very mildly subverted by making it the third zone instead of the very first. (Careful Crusher, you had the audience on the edge of their seats there.)

More importantly though, it's possibly one of the most famous and celebrated level tropes in the series. Emerald Coast is undeniably iconic, Seaside Hill is just as iconic while also merging with the Green Hill setup, and Wave Ocean... is a poor man's Emerald Coast, but it's probably better than most levels in '06 by comparison, so it too is iconic, from a certain point of view. We can't forget Jungle Joyride either, even if that's mostly because we got to see the frame rate die before our very eyes.

So how do you make your interpretation stand out? How do you prevent having a Wave Ocean 2: Wave Oceaner on your hands? Well, it's actually very simple...

Creating Zone 3: Coastline Resort

3-1: Shining Shore

Remember when I said that sometimes all it takes to make an environment feel different is the time of day, or a change in weather? This is one of the first major examples of putting that philosophy into action, as compared to previous beach levels, which were usually content with taking place in the bright sunny daytime, this one takes place under a pleasant purple sunset.

This of course contrasting heavily with not only the blue sea, but also the sands, which although given a mild touch of purple courtesy of the sunset, cannot fully hide their natural shade of white.

And of course, waterfalls.

We can’t forget the waterfalls.

Despite being a true blue beach level first and foremost, there are also a few hints of plaza, further setting it apart from the Emerald Coasts and Not-Emerald Coasts of old times past. This aesthetic in particular is based heavily on the seaside town of Whitby.

No doubt Sonic would admire this place, at least when he's not forced to go deep underwater. Maybe when the adventure is over, he can come back here and have a relaxing moment with... someone. Dunno who though. I doubt Eggman would be interested, and not just because he's actually in-character. Oh well, plenty more horses in the sea.

Speaking of, what about the underwater sections? Shining Shore does have them after all, in full 3D, as opposed to making them bottomless pits in disguise. Unsurprisingly, everything's a lot more blue than purple down there, gorgeously so, but the coral reef provides its own variety of colour.

The local fishies don't seem to mind you being in their line of sight... nor do the Badniks, but probably for a different reason.

Since we're three zones in, you might have noticed by now that each zone, regardless of their overall colour scheme, has one element in at least one act that goes all rainbow with the colours than everything else. You had the flower patches in Gleaming Meadows, you had the wood barriers in Tricky Tropics with their rusting paint jobs, and now we have the coral reef in Coastline Resort... any reason for this?

Alas, the answer is a mundane one: it's just a little way of tying all the zones in Viridonia together. As this quest revolves around the mystery of the elusive Ethereal Zone, this seemingly inconsequential aspect is a way of ensuring that it will always remain at the back of your mind. It may be relatively more subtle and easy to miss than, say, a giant moon glaring down angrily at you no matter where you go on the map as it literally comes closer and closer to killing everyone, but the intention is effectively the same: the central meat of the setting and story is always present in some form, however indirect, even if the characters aren't currently discussing it.

Also, shout out to the lighthouse that helped our heroes by inadvertently blinding the pursuing mechanized orca.

You really put a dent in Heavy Gunner's strategy.

First Section (calm): Lagoony Tunes (Crash Bandicoot 2: N-Tranced) Peach Field (Mario Hoops 3-on-3)

Second Section (adrenaline): Lost Palace (Team Sonic Racing) Hang Eight (Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back)

3-2: Crazy Rapids

Being a whimsical water park, made even more whimsical to fit the video game format, this one explains itself in a lot of areas. But let's go over the finer details anyway, shall we?

As mentioned in the fic, the park has been made to fit in seamlessly with the ruins present in the area, thus creating a Good Future-esque wonderland of nature and technology in harmony. For an idea of how the ruins aesthetic would work, imagine something akin to the Sunset Beach Resort in Jamaica, particularly the long bridge and archways you can see in both of these shots:

Kind of has an Aquatic Ruin vibe, doesn’t it?

Even then, that only applies to half of the architecture, as the other half breaks up the yellow with some white, reminiscent of a certain OTHER watery location in Sonic's past...

We also have the giant fountains sprinkled around the place. There are two types of fountains to be exact, both of which may seem familiar to the attentive eye...

The difference? They're larger. MUCH larger. As in, you can actually platform your way on and around them.

As for what’s inside? It's exactly how you'd imagine it to be, albeit exaggerated even further to befit a Sonic level.

And in-tune with the beachside mood, the Chao Garden found nearby would take a page from the one in Station Square...

...with a little extra flavor of this...

...complete with miniature water slides and the like for the adorable inhabitants... the inhabitants that Eggman currently has an unexplained interest in. How do the Chao factor into his latest plan?

Heh heh, only I and those I've discussed it with in PMs know that for now.

First Section (outside): Windy and Ripply (Sonic Adventure) Ocean Palace (Sonic Heroes)

Second Section (inside): Data Select (Tee Lopes) Wii Shop Channel - Mii Channel (Super Smash Bros. Wii U)

3-3: Aquarium Gallery

Disappointed that Crazy Rapids lacked that smooth red-on-blue contrast that Aquarium Park from Sonic Colours had? Well we can’t all be in the same league as Eggman sadly, but fear not, for the similarly named Aquarium Gallery gets right in on the action, combining red walls and an overall upper class aesthetic...

...with the expected quantities of shimmering blue that comes with the aquarium setting. And with glass tanks of great size, comes great fishies to go along with them.

The black and white checkered floor would also be a must. It's a Sonic game, we gotta have a checkered pattern somewhere. It just works. /ToddCrusher

Don't worry about the living conditions for the fish here, by the way. Eggman mechanizing them aside, the people who work at the park - and those who visit it - make sure to treat all the marine life with the utmost respect and kindness. Just a shame that they're apparently not so willing to lend that same understanding to Trudy... but it does provide an early hint that despite the few genuine bad apples who are outright antagonistic towards Trudy, most of the folks ignorant to her condition are exactly that at worst: ignorant. Meaning, despite first impressions, most of them are not bad people at heart, and with a little help and persistence, it's not entirely impossible that they can eventually learn to understand and sympathise with Trudy's situation.

In other words, they have more dimension than the background characters in Sonic Boom, where they're all mostly a bunch of one-note arseholes with little redeeming qualities and don’t deserve to be saved by Sonic in the slightest.

Anyhow, eventually, after a trip through one of those sweet underwater tunnels...

...we find ourselves in the cavern area, where red is exchanged for turquoise, and there are reflected ripples galore. Since the Marble Caves in Chile already look halfway to being a Sonic level due to its unique formations, that's the best comparison I can make here.

Too blue, you might say? Well, the sunset from earlier would be poking through the holes in the wall, adding some warm to the cool once more... the giant seashells everywhere help spice it up too.

Like these, but bigger than Ken Penders’ ego.

If that’s even possible...

First Section (aquarium): Rooftop Run - Night (Sonic Unleashed) Coconut Mall (Mario Kart Wii)

Second Section (caves): Sea Shell Shenanigans (Crash Bandicoot: The Wrath of Cortex) Dire, Dire Docks (Super Mario 64)

3-4: Hydro Plant

The outside structure for this place is shaped like a giant wall, which predictably brings the Hoover Dam to mind:

And that applies inside as well, at least initially. The similarities indoors come mostly from the generators, as well as the sheer size of the place.

Since it's considerably rustier however, we have darker lighting in place, with the sunset outside preventing it from being too dark inside. There’s also a copious amount of daring graffiti caused by hoodlums... or maybe Eggman, since he'd probably be the type to do that to any property that isn't his. Some of this graffiti would look very impressive...

While others would... uh...

Look, they tried, okay?

With all this graffiti, that means there’s opportunity for a generous helping of cheeky references to previous installments if you’re able to find them... and if you can understand them. To this day, the typo in “make belif reborn” has not been corrected. Absolutely disgusting.

But as the fic dictates, the further you go on, the tidier and more high tech it becomes. Simply put, this section would remind one of Aquatic Base from '06, mainly because I've always liked the idea despite its characteristically terrible level design, so why not salvage the concept and give it a second chance?

With some added flavor to make it less monotone, mind you. Like actual water sections, some green lights to break up all the blue, giant crab robot threatening to kill you... the works.

Sonic may be glad that this zone is behind him, but little does he know, it's not the only zone with intense water action around these parts. Luckily for him, that won't be for a while, so he can breathe a sigh of relief for now. Still, we know Eggman has other ways of keeping the gang on their toes...

First Section (rusty): Wily Stage 2 (Mega Man 7) Pokey Pipes (Donkey Kong Country 3)

Second Section (high tech): Ocean Base Act 1 (Sonic Advance 3) H2 Oh No (Crash Bandicoot: The Wrath of Cortex)

[diangeloyoyok]

my review on pjo movies

first up with have The Lighting Thief obviously

 Poseidon’s entrance lowkey kinda fire but high key weird

‘it’s been many years’ didn’t y’all just have that winter solstice party together ???

‘if your son if the thief i will send him to the pits of tartarus’ ouch that hurt ngl

logan lerman 🥺

he would’ve been such a good percy if they did the movies when he was younger IDC IDC IDC

i stan black grover and just grover overall

i wish we got to see my bitch nancy

sally and percy sallY AND PERCY SALLY AND PERCY SALLY AND PERCY

gabe to me is just *hmm* perfect in this movie, he’s not as mean in the movies but he’s still an asshole ehehehe

i love Chiron actor i think it’s very accurate

also wtf chiron is bros with the big three lols 😹

y’all know jenna davis?- that’s who the girl who plays ms dodd’s looks like

so they just gonna ignore him and tak ab him while he’s RIGJT. THERE.

‘This is a pen. This is a pen.’

‘Are you guys crazy? This is a pen man!’

the scene with gabe makes me uncomfy bc percy says in the book gabe never hits percy in front of sally but ok 😗✌️

leaving percy was the *mOST* difficult thing poseidon *the GOD of water* has ever done wow percy is that cool

‘You’re half donkey?!”

i am da wittlest minotaur 😳✨🙈

such a subtle entrance to the camp love it

why y’all give percy the pen before he supposed to be a badass and rip the horn off wjth his hands but ig

wait so in this dumbass movie percy doesn’t even do anything to get the horn goodbye

i’m still very pissed that they took the scene of annabeth sayjng ‘you drool when you sleep’ but it’s fine i’m NOT fine

why is no one wearing camp shirts 🤬

they may be wrong but i didnt know it was ‘brUnner’ not ‘brUNner’

it’s kinda cute how when percy first sees annabeth he’s like ‘ooouuu who’s that name now 😌😏”

brown haired blue eyed looking ass BITCH

‘A real horses ass’ laughed a LITTLE

so the poseidon cabin is just *THAT* open poor percy no privacy

oh wait wth they already know his daddy poseidon 🤨

like everyone just knew ????

when did percy get new clothes the fuck

why did everyone laugh and shake their heads when chiron introduced percy what whores

omg luke 🥺

i know everyone knows this but it’s *SOOOOOOOOO* unrealistic annabeth and luke aren’t on the same team. like i’m pretty sure in the first book annabeth said they had a permanent allies type thing with the hermes cabin

‘that’s a sword! that’s a sword’ aw baby luke why’d you have to be evil 🙁🤚

where the FUCK did that bitch tryna be annabae come from

she realky said ‘i love trees🌲☺️❤️’

why does annabeth act like clarisse during capture the flag

also the fuCK WHERE MY BABY CLARISSE

why are there like actual 30 yr olds at camp

luke was so excited when he saw percy get up he said ‘omg no way✨’

so suddenly percy just knows sword play 😀

and deFEATS ANNABETH WE ALL KNOW HE CANT EVEN DO THAT NOW

y’all red heads a bunch of babies

i already know it’s coming

shit no

i hate it

i hate it so much

already ew’d out

‘i definitely have strong feelings for you, i just haven’t decided if they’re positive or negative yet.’

‘well you let me know when you figure it out’

‘you’ll be the first’

why they just drinking nectar for fun?? like bruh you tryna die or sum

after that i can’t watch anymore tonight

it’s been like 3 weeks but let’s not talk about that

i’m not even gonna comment on the campfire scene anymore my god

i like how in movies everyone is like “omg the underworld so scary percy you can’t go that’s so dangerous you will DIE”

and in the books they’re like “yeah it’s dangerous but whateva you 12 yr olds have fun down there bring me a souvenir!!”

why does luke have?? video?? games?? in?? his?? cabin??

WAIT LIKE A WHOLE ASS TECHNOLOGY SETUP WHAT

why is luke the only one in his cabin like where’s the stolls and chris 😳

you mean to tell me luke broke into hermes house just for like funzies and to steal shit?

sounds like travis and connor but ok✨

what the fuck even is the whole pearl plot

i don’t even wanna talk about the medusa scene

percy has an ipod 🤡

“i’ve only been in the outside world a few times” did you fucking practice driving those few times or WHAT

if percy could actually heal people with water wowie imagine how useful

why did percy bring swimming trunks on a quest

can this brown haired bitch shut up already

sally never took gabes last name excuse you 🤣

ofc it’s fucking fox news giving us that bullshit info on sally

they in nashville wee-doggie 🤠

‘hey it’s your mom’ obviously dumbass she has eyes

so they hid in the potty room for like 5 hours? huh

yeah let’s jus facetime lukey real quick 🥰

silly boy percy

“how flipping awesome was that”

does percy even know he can bend water in the first book

that’s gonna be an unexplainable statue for the workers tmrw

lotus hotel baby

the only reason this movie is watchable

vegas be lookin kinda fresh i wannna go

i wanna stay at the lotus hotel this place looks sick asf

lotus flower treats yummy yum

here comes gaga 😮

why they laugjing so much

wonder if nico likes gaga

imagine like 10 yr old nico just straight vibing there

grover pulling out the dance movies yessir 🤩

“no❤️ percy don’t eat the flower”

why didn’t percy just like grab the flowers and throw them

OOOO KESHA WE LOVE TO SEE IT

TIKTOK ON THE CLOCK BUT THE PARTY DONT STOP NOW WOAHWOAHWOAH

i’m bored ✨

ooo skeletons

charon my queen 👑🥳

“we drowned in a bathtub, all three of us” 😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

i wish that was in the movie

i wish a lot of things were in the movie hit that is high

we’re in the same boat in the very same boat

how do you get seasick in an elevator- BOAT?

the way to the underworld is over the styx it’s a river

i know, you show off chicks

sexist much? go make a splash

i’ll splash you

it’s like watching titian’s clash, they’ll kill each other it they’ll kiss if we’re lucky they’ll end up in an abyss

um

anyways✨

hades do be looking kinda cool tho

that’s a cool ring you got there hades

omg mommy sally 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

how did percy not notice the lightening bolt in the damn shield befORE???

“it’s luke shield he betrayed us”

damn she switched sides real fast

this phoney bitch why does she want power and a war sis go plant shit

i refuse to believe hades is abusive sorry sis you ain’t fooling me

god where’s Juniper when you need her

so no fight between percy and aries 🤡

instead we have lukey pukey

omh he’s the lightening thief i did not see that coming ong 😳

^^ me on twitter after it’s revealed on the percy jackson tv show

can this luke character chile

percy pulled a harry styles and said “i’m falling” 😔

i’m thE SON OF POSEIDON I NEVER ASKED TO BE BUT IM THE SON OF POSEIDON

“yeah, i think i am the son of poseidon”

okay 🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋🦋

omG i goT bUtTerFliEs

how does s-dog jusy know how to get to olympus did y’all get freaky up there or

that’s actually kinda how i imagine olympus looking so

i guess

good job

maybe

what is this ant man why they so small

“i have no connection to poseidon”

p-dog looked kinda hurted 😳

as if zeus would ever compliment percy

has athena ever told annabeth *or any of her kids* i’m proud of you

“i need to speak with him” “just this once”

yet we got poseidon showing up once in awhile just to say hi

7 months? 😀

percy was 7 months old?

now i don’t remember much but i don’t think it was that long luv ❤️

“always”

i thought i was watching percy jackson not harry potter tf is up

sally and percy have my whole heart

g-man got his horns

chiron 🥺✨

missed my main hoe 😍

why are there so many fucking campers

there’s like 500

let’s take a chill pill shall we

annabeth and percy look like siblings in this

 incest 😳

they bouta fiGHTshe better have won

k well that’s it thank the gods 😘

i’ll be back in like 4 months to review sea of monsters i need a break of bullshit

OH ITS NOT OVER

it’s gabe

he pulled a demi

stone cold

stone cold

everyone will be happier without him

[basicsofislam]

ISLAM 101: Muslim Culture and Character: Reflections (Tafakkur): Abuse of Religion and Religious Sentiments

ABUSE OF RELIGION AND RELIGIOUS SENTIMENTS

The quest for truth has two principal branches which, if the quest is motivated by sincere love of the truth sought, are radically joined – that is, they have fundamentally the same root and goal even though the branches diverge. The two branches are the seeking represented by religion and the seeking represented by science. The effort of the quest is aimed at discovering the relation between existence and human consciousness and perceptive powers within that existence. But the effort is also directed at what it (the effort) is for, and what attitude is to be taken to the knowledge we are given or obtain. This means that purpose and moral judgements enter the quest for truth and shape and colour its achievements. Now some people pretend that the science of nature is neutral about such matters. They are wrong to do so. In fact, though an individual working at some particular problem may believe him or herself to be applying neutral, objective procedures, that person’s work nevertheless entails sharing in all the structures of thought, the assumptions and purposes, which are a part of the culture of science as a whole in any particular epoch. That culture is not independent of questions of purpose and meaning: it is simply that such questions are not the immediate objective or concern of the individual scientist, and, for that reason, they remain implicit in the work being done. They become explicit in human attitudes (personal and societal) and in the technology that funds and (by its success) justifies the quest for scientific knowledge.

True science and true religion should be, as it were, fellow-travellers in that both passionately oppose superstition and falsehood; and, in any case, both have the same right of appeal to reasoned argument and to experience. Religion is the older quest in two important respects: first, in that it teaches and inspires love of truth for its own sake (that love is not and cannot be generated by science itself, though it motivates the best science); and, second, in that it upholds the Authority which gives to human reason its conditional authority – the Revelation of Gods Will to His Messengers, most comprehensively, reliably and finally in the Qur’an and in the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad, upon him be peace. Religion has a moral and philosophical, as well as a historical, priority. Denial of that priority in human life robs it of its most vital element, its deepest dynamic, and it deprives science of nobility of purpose. Scientific endeavour which does not aim to understand existence, which does not depend on the love for and zeal to know the truth, is liable to blindness and falling into contradictions. Perhaps without knowing it, but (surely) sometimes also knowingly, science becomes captive to ideological and doctrinal preconceptions, cultural prejudices, to the pursuit of power (instead of knowledge and understanding). When that happens, the inquirer’s way to truth is blocked up, and the endeavour of science as a whole does not yield understanding or improvement in either physical or human nature, but leads to the opposite, the ruin and degradation of both.

The priority of the religious quest for truth over the scientific quest for truth does not mean that it is exempt from falling into error and wrongdoing. Rather, it is the reason for even greater vigilance to maintain the soundness of beliefs and principles, the purity of intention and practice. Just as science can be rash and intolerant in attitude towards that which it regards as outside its culture, and so fail its vocation to seek the truth, so too religion can be abused and turned from a quest for pure, heavenly truth into a means for hatred, rancour and vindictiveness. A dogmatic and narrow-minded scientific community, enslaved to certain philosophical or ideological prejudices, can become more fanatical and dangerous in its consequences than ignorance. So too can a religious community when it reduces religion to a device to serve certain political interests or worldly advantages. Religion then ceases to be a heavenly inspiration for thought and conduct, and becomes instead an assemblage of meaningless ceremonies and a worldly ideology.

Institutions where sciences are taught and scientific studies are conducted are to be esteemed as highly as places of worship. However, the institutions where sciences are used to promote certain ideological biases or impose certain concepts to obtain material advantages, no longer deserve respect, as they are structures where selfish, ignoble desires and passions are nurtured. Likewise, if religion and religious sentiments are exploited to promote political ambitions and to divide people into factions, and if religion is taken as a rigid ideology giving rise to polarization and disruptions among people, then religion is no longer a means serving to lead people to God; rather, it is an obstacle before the true religion of God, an obstacle made up of fanaticism, enmity, hatred and belligerence.

However he may outwardly appear, a man unconscious of the true nature of belief and deprived of knowledge and love of God, who cannot measure the principles of religion in the scales of the religion itself, who does not give priority to that to which God gives priority, is disrespectful of the heavenly and universal identity of religion and has no right to claim to be truly religious. What is most opposed to both religion and science is that selfish desires and fancies are presented in the guise of objective knowledge and religious sentiments. This is a weakness in human nature leading people to ostentation and worldly expectations. People tend to sublimate their defects and shortcomings and science and religion are two important devices they use to this end. The most effective weapon of conscience against such a tendency is love of truth; if there is an elixir to dissolve from minds the ‘scientific’ dross, and remove from hearts the tendency to false show of religious devotion, it is love of the Creator and love of truth and the love of His creation arising there from. If hearts are ardent with love and spirits with yearning, it is possible to mend moral defects and elevate human beings to true humanity.

The world of mankind recognized love of truth through the Prophets, and it is this love which leads people to love of God and to build healthy relations with existence. From the very beginning, all Prophets guided their followers to that love and based their relations with their people on that love. It was only when absorbed in love of God that men have been able to find their true identity and value. The Prophet Jesus upon him be peace, composed a poem of life based on love of man and fulfilled his mission by conveying it to others. The Prophet Muhammad, upon him be peace, honoured the world as, in the words of a classical Turkish poet, ‘the commander of the army of lovers’ and expressed love throughout his life. When love of God became in him irresistible, he went on to the other world. The Qur’an, when recited with conviction and concentration, will be understood as a declaration of love, in addition to the charm of its music and phrasing. Love of truth, love of science, the urge to research, the call to reason and to exercise self-control – these are the points which the Qur’an reiterates and about which it warns people. They are like mines in which a careful, believing reciter of the Qur’an can find new, different jewels every time he seeks.

How unfortunate it is that, despite its wealth of power to heal all our wounds, to end all our centuries-old pains and cure our diseases, this precious Book has long been approached with superficial attitudes and disagreeable intentions and used by many capricious persons, desirous of the world and in pursuit of self- interests, as a device to always accuse others and acquit and absolve themselves, and exploited as an excuse for the hatred, belligerence and impudence originating in their own dark souls. This is why many seeking truth and the true path come to it with suspicion and doubt. Approaching people with anger and feelings of enmity and vengeance in the name of the Qur’an, and confusing communicating its message with looking for ways to satisfy certain political or worldly ambitions disguised under religious aims, results in imitating others in atrocities and wrongdoing. It should be understood that Islam is neither an ideology nor merely a political, economic and social system, nor is the Qur’an a book calling its followers to kindle fires of war and enmity among people.

The Qur’an came down to the world with a balance. It seeks to establish a perfect balance – the balance observed in the whole of the universe which the Qur’an orders us not to destroy – in the relations of an individual with other individuals, with his family, his community and with the whole of existence. The Qur’an aims to establish peace and harmony. So, it ought never to be used to cause disruptions and mischief among people and it by no means sanctions or allows putting pressure on consciences and minds. Rather, it seeks to remove pressure from consciences and minds so that people may find truth.

Those who set their hearts upon the lofty ideals established by the Qur’an continue to live until eternity and have an honoured place in the hearts of others, similarly inspired. But those who exploit those ideals in pursuit of their debased ambitions remain as chained slaves of their desires and fancies. Their lives are spent in humiliation and end in doom.

A true, sincere student of the Qur’an aims to convey others to eternity. While he is constantly advancing to his destination along his own way, those drowned in their wrong suppositions and ambitions regard him as mad and see him as misguided.

The aim of a sincere student of the Qur’an is like a catapult throwing him directly into the world of pure spirituality beyond this base world tainted with selfish interests and mean aspirations, or it is like a rocket put in orbit round the truth. Religion is the pure source feeding him and the Prophet is the one who offers it. Those who cannot approach this blessed source through the gate of the Prophet, those who cannot dive deep in this source after the guidance of the Prophet with the necessary equipment to find the gems of truth required in this age, will not succeed in presenting as religion the ideas originating in their dark minds and souls, nor succeed in disguising their fancies and desires as religious ideas.

The Qur’an is a resource of infinite depth; whoever dives in it with a sincere intention to satisfy his needs of every kind – spiritual, intellectual, social, etc.- will find the cure he seeks. The deeper one grows in understanding and knowledge, the more one will find the Qur’an, like a rainbow, far above one’s level, impossible to reach. Following religion means being able to see the light of the Qur’an and the Prophetic way of life reflected through the prism of one’s time, place and conditions and being illumined by it.

[blackmuzak8484]

nortey dowuona’s best of 2020

to be completely honest, I decided to do this entirely for TSJ. otherwise, I wouldn’t have bothered at all. Best end lists are for music nerds and billboard chart nerds and industry vultures, and i happen to be subscribed, in the discord and in the comments of the youtube vids of these folk. so, i decided to pick 10 out of random from the big best of 2020 i was compiling for the whole of the year, which I was gonna post to this Tumblr at the end of the damn year, but I guess I can just post the link to the playlist in the bottom of this post. Here, i’m gonna write about 10 songs I personally love, and pick out a few artists i specifically loved:

artist of the year.

RAP Ferreira put out his best album and best verses in a year everybody either stagnated, fell off or got rendered irrelevant by the world at large. He was ebullient, hilarious, thoughtful and even surprisingly honest. I enjoyed the fact that now he’s begun to create a real platform for many talented folx, and I hope he continues to do that in the margins and make even more beautiful music in the years to come.

rookie of the year.

Enny by a mile. Everybody else who debuted this year got hamstrung by the pandemic but she created 3 great songs, each thoughtful, insightful and a joy. Apparently she just started publicly releasing music to a large audience, and I hope she gets better and better, and even gets bigger than J-

most pleasant surprise.

Vic Mensa’s V Tape. An artist who I though had no more moves left completely turned around his whole career with a fantastic performance at Lollapalooza, a fantastic fleet of features and tis gorgeously produced EP which had some of his most brilliant songs on it. I love it all, Vic Mensah is well and truly back. Welcome back bro. (ALSO, DROP THE DRILL TRACK.)

GREAT THING A GHANAIAN ARTIST DID.

Strongman Burner, Amarae, Okunta Kinte, Vic Mensah in general.

cool things my friends and classmates did.

Justine Darcenne’s #4TheBaeless. Valencia Rae’s Siren thyhomebodies’s Coming of Age. (Phil, a producer in the group, made his own studio!) Brad built his own computer. petit abri put a track on APT9 Record’s compiliation album Volume II. khaalid anderson’s transitions. (khaalid will also be performing at Beats & Brunch on January 23, 2021 at 11 am.) Yannick Paul’s Bear Fruit. The Big Climax’s This Is Ya Boy kxng jetson’s Waves (ft. Kokko Williams & Mike Mezzl) Nicole Gonzalez performed in The Composer’s Melody. Victoria Marie released a bunch of beaufiful covers on her Insta, @toriiii_marie @ph0ssy_jaw works as a counselor online. Pay her at her PayPal. Johnny Aperano Yoba was on People AND Vogue. Dalitso is a wonderful pianist at his church back home in Zambia. Kobina is a fantastic drummer at his church. Kayla graduated with a BS in Music Technology and Industry! Damian been cookin on his insta. Travis graduated! (Look out for Clan of Dragons.) Rorghino Flores made a documentary! Francis (and Animax FYB) put out Mmofra on AmaLexPrime! (play it with yo kids.) A Hype has been dropping crazy all year, roll by his SoundCloud and check out Persistence Of Memory. Reina H been doing great covers on her Insta, @challenges_inlife. Hannah placed music on C. B. S.

best albums of the year (that nobody’s written about).

Maya Huyana -1991 DaWeirdo - Broke and Ugly $ilkMoney - Attack of the Future Shocked, Flesh Covered, Meatbags of the 85 VI Seconds - Because Why Not/Never Knows Best Erik Cain - Heart & Soul Vol. 2 Dimitri & the Scarecrow - Messenger is Sender (from 2015, finally got released onto streaming this year, still pretty great and another great Zimbabwean rapper for us to all fawn over, just like billy woods) Flowking Stone - Gifted 1 The Hoodies - Incommunicado Jayy Grams - Every Gram Counts Domo Genesis/Mike and Keys - Just in Case1/2 Madwiz - God’s Gold Teeth Maez301 - Hasaan Daara J Family - Yaamatele Dai Burger - Dessert EP TeePhlow - Road To Phlowducation II Tef Poe/Blvck Spade - Preacher in the Trap Terrell Hines - Portal One: The Mixtape redveil - niagara Nyukyung - Trap Harmonix AdrianXpression - Sucka Deante Hitchcock - Better (Deluxe) maassai & jWords - ve.loc.i.ty tobe nwigwe - cincoriginals everything Kelsey Lu did this year.

strangest things happening in music in general.

vic mensah actually making a great record. goldlink going through a narcissistic collapse and winding up making the best music of his career. redveil blowing up off Fantano calling him wack. pharoahe monch finally making a rock pivot and it actually works. meet me@the garden coming 10 years too late for my 14 year old self. RAP Ferreira being in the NYTimes, selling a vinyl record for $72, creating an actual nostrum grocers in a video game so we can listen to his next record. The entirety of the playboi carti phenomenom. The entirety of the lil uzi vert phenomenom. The entirety of Chance’s instagram EP being far more money worthy then the entirety of the Big Day and yet being released on Insta and not immediately monetized. Deante Hitchcock releasing a great album and being completely forgotten armand hammer releasing their underground kings wayyy too early. my ass continually not actually looking into amapiano despite always loving it when I review it. several good songs needing to be tacked on to a prior youtube vid as an ad for me to find them instead of actually listening to the artists. santan dave still releasing good verses after he made his illmatic. (expect his new album to suck.) slowthai becoming cake. (we let that go way too far.) Guapdad and BfB Packman being wonderful. Finding out BfB PAckman is a better rapper than Sada Baby. John Boyega putting on Ego Ella May. Having to admit Young Dolph was good all this time and i missed out like a fool.

best tv performance.

Chance The Rapper’s “A Chi-Town Christmas.” IDK’s “Change The Channel.” Sa-Roc’s Tiny Desk Concert. Chika in general. Robert Glapser’s “This Changes Everything (ft. Denzel Curry).” SZA at the Roots Picnic. Sampa The Great at the Roots Picnic. RAP Ferreira in general. Umi’s “Introspection Live Show.” Alexa Esperanza’s cover of “Is It A Crime.” Bad Bunny in general. the jwords, nappy nina and MIKE performances at Satellite Syndicate

most embarrassing piece of music i love with all my heart

Logic’s No Pressure. In all sense of the words I should not love this album like I love my siblings but I do. It is beautiful.

best 10 songs of this year objectively

1 - RAP Ferriera - An Idea Is A Work Of Art (ft. Mike Ladd) [prod. by Kenny Segal, mr. carmack and Mike Parvizi]

I know, I know. In all honesty Doldrums should be here. Then Noz put it on his best list and I had to be all ChiTown Go-Getter and pick the next better thing: this. And in all honesty, it has the best lyric RAP spits on the album: “we build better answers.” But it’s not just that, it’s RAP’s most animated performance, the most dexterous piece on the whole album and the most gorgeous beat, a loping bassline sliding behind the flatfooted drum, allowing Mike Ladd, his musical father, to gently drift through, saying, “what if royalty depised us?” and knowing the only gold is soul and giving it to all of us, all us maggots and vultures and locusts and weevils, to hold to the light so we can finally see. On the quest to get open and free, we continue.

2 - Chika - U Should [prod. by Lido]

I heard this the night it dropped and shot 2 insta videos playacting as it played. But apart from that, it’s a intimate, beautiful song about getting to know a new lady love, so tenderly sung it might melt and disappear if not held gently, with a sweeping guitar lick and purring trumpets sliding all over the place, Chika softly holding each frayed piece together into a considered, gorgeous piece - wait, she’s talking her shit.

3 - Issa Gold - Boys Don’t Cry [prod. by Kingjet & Sherwyn and Matt Zara]

The only reason this isn’t number one is because it dropped on Christmas Eve. But otherwise, it’s a openheart letter to us all. “it’s a lonely path being different,” Issa says, swimming in the melted ice caps as he once danced happily on the edges of melting glaciers that failed to drown him, looking at the world that keeps hurting his heart, yet he still opens his eyes and smiles, and dances. The heavy drums are so bouncy the whole song suddenly flies, formerly a hidden murmur becoming a bright sunlit flight across the sky so we can all see. I can’t wait to see Tempus, if it’s anything as good as this was.

4 - Deante Hitchcock - Growing Up/Mother God [prod. by Brandon Phillips-Taylor]

In all honesty, “Growing Up” is really not the best song on Better. It’s a sweet, happy song with a smooth, crackling bassline with soft, ghostly synths, but still kinda ok. It’s the song added at the end, “Mother God”, that has warm, sizzling piano chords and gorgeous singing in the back. It’s one of the few time I’ve ever heard a man pay homage to the woman in his life and to the God above while being entirely sincere and not faking the funk. The way he praises his mom, his lady, remembering the women in his family taking care of him and him foolishly neglecting Breonna due to his overburdened mind feels full of details, remembrances, explanations and praises. Plus, it actually makes sense that God, if she exists (she does) is a woman since -

5 - Yana Perrault - whiskey and weed [prod. by slate]

Apparently, Yana Perrault is verified now. Excellent. {YES YES MY GOD YESS}, It means more folks know about how great this song, and Yana herself is. If I had any sense, I would’ve written up 12:21 as the best song of 2018, but such is life. Anyway, we have this smooth, bass heavy slinker with shimmering percussion and lumbering drums about hooking up with a former flame who’s “sober” yet keeps on calling Yana to break their sobriety, “know we ain’t talked in a while but you still know my address,” she wryly mentions. As the beat sprints away under a warm cocoon of accapella echoes, it mirrors a relationship so tenuous it might disappear into the wind. Yet still strong enough to have whiskey on call.

6 - Marlon Craft - Culture Sick Freestyle [prod. by Cormill]

Apparently this was supposed to be a shot at Flex. And since Flex is a woman beater and a lame, good for him. Shouldn’t have even gone on Flex to be honest, but then again neither should Jay Critch or Tyler or Black Thought and besides, I watch those freestyles too. And on the freestyle, Marlon frankly put things in perspective. “You don’t want us to better, you just want to be cool still.” This describes all of rap media to be real. And tellingly, it only has 310,000 views. Methinks nobody really wants real. But I do. Thank u Marlon, you continue to be the best white rapper alive. (Nowhere near the best rapper tho, and if Token hadn’t fell off -)

7 - Miah - Cascades [prod. by Cedes]

I’m sideeyeing the boy Miah cuz I had to search up his Audiomack to find the producer’s name (it’s Cedes, and they have a really great avalanche of Drake Type Beats is you like that kind of thing). Were you trying to trick folk into thinking you produced it yourself? You don’t need to do that shit. Especially since you’re writing stuff like “back in high school all my peers were tryin to hit the league / until the league too far from reach so they tap dancing over beats.” When you can frankly break down life that clearly, don’t be trying to hide producer’s names unless you actually learn to produce too. Plaster your name all over that shit.

8 - Justine Darcenne - Off Days [prod. by Mikhail Miller] / Enny - Peng Black Girls (ft. Amia Brave [prod. by Paya]

Justine is indeed my classmate, but that’s not why this song is here. it’s here because it’s a nice little guitar driven song with a spellbinding bridge that’s the best thing I’ve heard her do yet. And I’mma keep it short cuz I already wrote this up at the Singles Jukebox.

Enny released this soft, cushiony record with washed out synths over bulky drums and floated FLOATED over them without even trying to run in the tar, saying frankly, “He said to me, 'they put guns in the streets, that’s what they wanted for me.’ And I said, ‘G, someone can fix you a plate but no one can force you to eat.’” After all, why not try to live for something greater than what the world has expected you to be. And Amia sings, “We’re gon be alright, ok?” with the joy and excitement of someone realizing the words coming alive on their tongue. One of the best songs of this miserable year, and it’s kinda funny watching Jorja accidentally Drake out Amia and even Enny (and by funny I mean irritating.)

9 - Tobi Lou - okay (ft. Dreezy) [prod. by Matteo Woods & Dilip]

Fun fact: Dilip did some great songs with Otxhello, a producer who recorded and mixed 2 records on my first album. That again is not why this song is here. The warm, swinging synths and heavy, bouncy drums are why this is here. Oh, and Tobi’s goofy, silly lyrics and his surprisingly effective Missy Elliott tribute are great too. But obviously, the verse that vaulted this into top 10 was Dreezy, which opens with such a openhearted line, “i can’t help it, it’s too hard to say I’m sorry.” And every line is harder than the last, until she closes with “and I ain’t talkin frontals but we got the city sown up.” Absolutely amazing.

10 - Strongman Burner - Pilolo (ft. KelvynBoy) [prod. by Nixie]

The sweet, gooey synths are poured over the soft, zipping and smooth drums as the wiry bass whirls between Kelvyn’s soft, thin crooning as Stoneman tap dances over the drums, both desperate and defiant, trying to salvage a sinking relationship that he knows is already gathering coral and snappers. It’s the best afropop song of the year and yet it still has a Nigerian on it (well, I put 4 Nigerians on here, next year I’m rectifying that.) And they even did a song together last year , not as good as this. At all. (still pretty good tho.)

best 10 songs i love (but not enough to write full paragraphs for, I already put 10 in and this is already 5 goddamn pages)

11 - Logic - Heard ‘Em Say

best song on the project that isn’t Dadbod but at least it isn’t tempting fate.

12 - Deqn Sue - Creep

I already love this for having a gorgeous bridge, and is cute af. Yes Sue, you can creep.

13 - Quelle Chris & Chris Keys - Sudden Death/ka - i love {moms, mimi, kev}

QUELLE CHIS CAN SANG SANG./ka can heart heart write.

14 - IDK - Square Up (ft. Juicy J)

I don’t know why this is here either but this slaps regardless.

15 - Nappy Nina - Modestly (ft. Maassai)

Maassai is creating some of the best raps out here. so is Nappy Nina.

16 - Kehlani - Lexii’s Outro (ft. Lexii Ajaii)

Let’s celebrate our great rappers when they’re alive (and this includes me. Pls Chika, don’t win Best New Artist.)

17 - Samad Savage - Goodnight

What Travis Scott should’ve tried to be instead of what he is now. Samad still dope af regardless.

18 - Bad Bunny - Si Veo Tu Mama

The way Bad Bunny actually hits that last note makes me feel so excited and alive.

19 - Fat Tony - Back In The Saddle

I fucked up. But I’m getting back in the saddle, back in the saddle next year. NO NIGERIANS ALL NIGERIENS. #ENDSARS tho.

20 - Lady A - the truth is loud

Why am I the only one who has this on a best list? I have 34 bot followers. Vibe, step it up.

best of 2020 music right here folxs.

worst music things of the year:

The Pop Smoke album. Just in all areas. (Better win that Grammy tho.) Travis Scott in general. (So loud and empty and boring.) Big Sean’s Detroit 2. (why does this exist? Just put out Deep Reverence and Detroit Night Cypher and leave everything on the cutting room floor fo the next album.) Remembering all the great rappers who are dead or incarcerated. No Kendrick album (just leaks. Not good enough.) J. Cole and Noname beefing and Noname getting strung up by twitter. Jay Rock pushing being anti-vaccinations. The realization that Normani might never drop a single record ever again. Tory Lanez in general. Joyner Lucas making actually good songs and falling off almost immediately. Cardi B in general. Anything positive being said about steven Universe songs. Luzamity shipping (until it’s canon please stop! Willuz is RIGHT THERE!)

[tawakkull]

ISLAM 101: Muslim Culture and Character: Reflections (Tafakkur): Part 2

ABUSE OF RELIGION AND RELIGIOUS SENTIMENTS

The quest for truth has two principal branches which, if the quest is motivated by a sincere love of the truth-seeker, are radically joined – that is, they have fundamentally the same root and goal even though the branches diverge. The two branches are the seeking represented by religion and the seeking represented by science. The effort of the quest is aimed at discovering the relation between existence and human consciousness and perceptive powers within that existence. But the effort is also directed at what it (the effort) is for, and what attitude is to be taken to the knowledge we are given or obtain. This means that purpose and moral judgments enter the quest for truth and shape and color its achievements.

Now some people pretend that the science of nature is neutral about such matters. They are wrong to do so. In fact, though an individual working at some particular problem may believe him or herself to be applying neutral, objective procedures, that person’s work nevertheless entails sharing in all the structures of thought, the assumptions, and purposes, which are a part of the culture of science as a whole in any particular epoch. That culture is not independent of questions of purpose and meaning: it is simply that such questions are not the immediate objective or concern of the individual scientist, and, for that reason, they remain implicit in the work being done. They become explicit in human attitudes (personal and societal) and in the technology that funds and (by its success) justify the quest for scientific knowledge.

True science and true religion should be, as it were, fellow-travelers in that both passionately oppose superstition and falsehood; and, in any case, both have the same right of appeal to reasoned argument and to experience. Religion is the older quest in two important respects: first, in that it teaches and inspires love of truth for its own sake (that love is not and cannot be generated by science itself, though it motivates the best science); and, second, in that it upholds the Authority which gives to human reason its conditional authority – the Revelation of Gods Will to His Messengers, most comprehensively, reliably and finally in the Qur’an and in the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad, upon him be peace.

Religion has a moral and philosophical, as well as a historical, priority. Denial of that priority in human life robs it of its most vital element, its deepest dynamic, and it deprives the science of nobility of purpose. A scientific endeavor which does not aim to understand existence, which does not depend on the love for and zeal to know the truth, is liable to blindness and falling into contradictions. Perhaps without knowing it, but (surely) sometimes also knowingly, science becomes captive to ideological and doctrinal preconceptions, cultural prejudices, to the pursuit of power (instead of knowledge and understanding). When that happens, the inquirer’s way to truth is blocked up, and the endeavor of science as a whole does not yield understanding or improvement in either physical or human nature but leads to the opposite, the ruin and degradation of both.

The priority of the religious quest for truth over the scientific quest for truth does not mean that it is exempt from falling into error and wrongdoing. Rather, it is the reason for even greater vigilance to maintain the soundness of beliefs and principles, the purity of intention and practice. Just as science can be rash and intolerant in attitude towards that which it regards as outside its culture, and so fail its vocation to seek the truth, so too religion can be abused and turned from a quest for pure, heavenly truth into a means for hatred, rancor, and vindictiveness. A dogmatic and narrow-minded scientific community, enslaved to certain philosophical or ideological prejudices, can become more fanatical and dangerous in its consequences than ignorance. So too can a religious community when it reduces religion to a device to serve certain political interests or worldly advantages. Religion then ceases to be a heavenly inspiration for thought and conduct and becomes instead an assemblage of meaningless ceremonies and a worldly ideology.

Institutions where sciences are taught and scientific studies are conducted are to be esteemed as highly as places of worship. However, the institutions where sciences are used to promote certain ideological biases or impose certain concepts to obtain material advantages, no longer deserve respect, as they are structures where selfish, ignoble desires and passions are nurtured. Likewise, if religion and religious sentiments are exploited to promote political ambitions and to divide people into factions, and if religion is taken as a rigid ideology giving rise to polarization and disruptions among people, then religion is no longer a means serving to lead people to God; rather, it is an obstacle before the true religion of God, an obstacle made up of fanaticism, enmity, hatred, and belligerence.

However he may outwardly appear, a man unconscious of the true nature of belief and deprived of knowledge and love of God, who cannot measure the principles of religion in the scales of the religion itself, who does not give priority to that to which God gives priority, is disrespectful of the heavenly and universal identity of religion and has no right to claim to be truly religious. What is most opposed to both religion and science is that selfish desires and fancies are presented in the guise of objective knowledge and religious sentiments. This is a weakness in human nature leads people to ostentation and worldly expectations. People tend to sublimate their defects and shortcomings and science and religion are two important devices they use to this end.

The most effective weapon of conscience against such a tendency is the love of truth; if there is an elixir to dissolve from minds the ‘scientific’ dross and remove from hearts the tendency to false show of religious devotion, it is love of the Creator and love of truth and the love of His creation arising therefrom. If hearts are ardent with love and spirits with yearning, it is possible to mend moral defects and elevate human beings to true humanity.

The world of mankind recognized the love of truth through the Prophets, and it is this love which leads people to love of God and to build healthy relations with existence. From the very beginning, all Prophets guided their followers to that love and based their relations with their people on that love. It was only when absorbed in love of God that men have been able to find their true identity and value. The Prophet Jesus (upon him be peace), composed a poem of life based on the love of man and fulfilled his mission by conveying it to others. The Prophet Muhammad, (upon him be peace), honored the world as, in the words of a classical Turkish poet, ‘the commander of the army of lovers’ and expressed love throughout his life.

When the love of God became in him irresistible, he went on to the other world. The Qur’an, when recited with conviction and concentration, will be understood as a declaration of love, in addition to the charm of its music and phrasing. Love of truth, love of science, the urge to research, the call to reason and to exercise self-control – these are the points which the Qur’an reiterates and about which it warns people. They are like mines in which a careful, believing reciter of the Qur’an can find new, different jewels every time he seeks.

How unfortunate it is that, despite its wealth of power to heal all our wounds, to end all our centuries-old pains and cure our diseases, this precious Book has long been approached with superficial attitudes and disagreeable intentions and used by many capricious persons, desirous of the world and in pursuit of self- interests, as a device to always accuse others and acquit and absolve themselves, and exploited as an excuse for the hatred, belligerence and impudence originating in their own dark souls. This is why much seeking truth and the true path come to it with suspicion and doubt. Approaching people with anger and feelings of enmity and vengeance in the name of the Qur’an, and confusing communicating its message with looking for ways to satisfy certain political or worldly ambitions disguised under religious aims results in imitating others in atrocities and wrongdoing. It should be understood that Islam is neither an ideology nor merely a political, economic and social system, nor is the Qur’an a book calling its followers to kindle fires of war and enmity among people.

The Qur’an came down to the world with a balance. It seeks to establish a perfect balance – the balance observed in the whole of the universe which the Qur’an orders us not to destroy – in the relations of an individual with other individuals, with his family, his community and with the whole of existence. The Qur’an aims to establish peace and harmony. So, it ought never to be used to cause disruptions and mischief among people and it by no means sanctions or allows putting pressure on consciences and minds. Rather, it seeks to remove pressure from consciences and minds so that people may find the truth.

Those who set their hearts upon the lofty ideals established by the Qur’an continue to live until eternity and have an honored place in the hearts of others, similarly inspired. But those who exploit those ideals in pursuit of their debased ambitions remain as chained slaves of their desires and fancies. Their lives are spent in humiliation and end in doom.

A true, sincere student of the Qur’an aims to convey others to eternity. While he is constantly advancing to his destination along his own way, those drowned in their wrong suppositions and ambitions regard him as mad and see him as misguided.

The aim of a sincere student of the Qur’an is like a catapult throwing him directly into the world of pure spirituality beyond this base world tainted with selfish interests and mean aspirations, or it is like a rocket put in orbit around the truth. Religion is the pure source feeding him and the Prophet is the one who offers it. Those who cannot approach this blessed source through the gate of the Prophet, those who cannot dive deep in this source after the guidance of the Prophet with the necessary equipment to find the gems of truth required in this age, will not succeed in presenting as religion the ideas originating in their dark minds and souls, nor succeed in disguising their fancies and desires as religious ideas.

The Qur’an is a resource of infinite depth; whoever dives in it with a sincere intention to satisfy his needs of every kind – spiritual, intellectual, social, etc.- will find the cure he seeks. The deeper one grows in understanding and knowledge, the more one will find the Qur’an, like a rainbow, far above one’s level, impossible to reach. The following religion means being able to see the light of the Qur’an and the Prophetic way of life reflected through the prism of one’s time, place and conditions and being illumined by it.

[parkersvibes]

finding out peter is spiderman

read part one here

a/n: omg guys. i got so much feedback from you all on part one so i decided to make a part 2. and yeahh i really hope you guys enjoy. if you do lmk and i’ll do a part 3 (:

(i also apologize if the read more doesnt work )))): )

warnings: fluff, a smidge on angst

pt 2. peter parker x stark!reader

• figuring out he was spiderman

• alright you’re a stark

• but no one knows that

• but you’re really intuitive

• so there were little things you started to notice

• after uncle ben died there was some weird shit (if you want a part ab comforting peter ab uncle ben lemme know. he deserves his own part)

• like how he stopped wearing his adorable glasses

•and i guess started almost bulking up????

• he got WAY taller

• and usually you’re used to seeing him shirtless but this one time you walked in on him

• holy mother of god

• IT WAS LIKE HE GREW ABS OVER NIGHT

• BECAUSE FRESHMAN PETE DID NOT HAVE A 6 PACK

• freshman peter also got winded walking up the stairs

• AND NOW HE’S RUNNING LAPS IN GYM LIKE ITS NOTHING ??

• must be nice

• but then things got more sus

• all of a sudden he was skipping class more

• leaving early

• cancelling study sessions and skipping movie nights with ned

• and you and ned were clueless

• you and ned started hanging out more

• MR. LEEDS IS HILARIOUS LEMME TELL YOU

• he was like this little ball of happiness

• you found out his real name is Edward

• HOW CUTE

• and WOW HIS MOM BEING FILIPINA MEANT THAT YOU WERE BEING FED ALL THE TIME OH MY GOD

• ngl pete got a bit jealous

• one night,,, when pete cancelled YET AGAIN

• ned asked you, “hey y/n?”

• “hm”

• “why don’t we ever hang out at your place”

• “i told you ned, my family is just a lot yanno. plus your family and may are really cool”

• “okay but how come you don’t have any social media under your name?”

• “wdym?”

• “like you go by ‘y/n Smith’ but everything that pops up on the internet isn’t YOU”

• “pfff i told you,,, i dont believe in that stuff”

• “y/n, you know you can tell me anything”

• you wanted to be honest. this was one of your best friends. and you’ve been lying to them about your family for over a year now

• “ned i just. it’s complicated”

• “like peter’s family?”

• “nonono, i’m lucky to have both of my parents- well i have a step mom. my real mom wanted nothing to do with me. so she left me on the steps of my dads house. never came back”

• “oh shit bro, i’m sorry”

• “nah don’t worry. my dad is really cool and my step mom... she’s awesome.”

• “what’re their names”

• NATASHA WAS GONNA KILL YOU IF SHE COULD SEE HOW BAD YOU WERE STRUGGLING

• “well- uh- my step moms name is,,, um. well her real name is Virginia”

• THE WORLD KNEW PEPPER AS PEPPER NOT VIRGINIA

• “and my- my dads name is ehm... st, steve???”

• natasha was gonna have your ass

• “y/n,,,”

• “yeah”

• “you’re a horrible liar”

• “PFFF WHAAAT? NO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT”

• “dude you left your spiderman fan tumblr open on my laptop that one night,,, and i MAY have done some snooping”

• okay you mightve had a slight obsession with the webslinger. HE WAS COOL. and what better way to keep track of him without alerting your family,,, good ol tumblr

• oh god ned, HOW MUCH SNOOPING”

• “enough to know that you have a weird obsession with that spider guy and that your last name isnt smith”

• so you told him the truth. you were a stark

• and well,,, he reacted with

• “okay cmon,,, don’t lie”

• so you showed him your late night dance parties with Nat when she was feeling goofy

• and your random snaps of steve when he was trying to figure out how to work technology

• videos of you reacting to vines with bucky

(if yall wanna see domestic life with the avengers just lmk)

• which usually results with THE WINTER SOLDIER ALMOST PEEING HIS PANTS. and trying to reenact it with sam or the other avengers

• “heyheyehy y/n guess what?”

• “what bucky?” *is in the middle of doing hw*

• “FRESHOVACADO” *bolts out of the room before you throw something at him*

• only the two of you getting vine and meme references

• (meaning getting in trouble during meetings bc you’ll make eye contact and start laughing)

• OH HIS FAVORITE IS THE “country boiiii, i love you,,, 😛”

• anywaayyy

• ned was SHOOK

• “nowayohmygodyoureanavenger”

• “no ned,,, only when they need me to be”

• *led to him asking 100000 questions*

• “does Mr. America smell like old man”

• “what language does Ms. Widow think in”

• “how many shirts does Mr. Hulk own”

• “so do they wear normal clothes or are they always PREPARED”

• “does your dad have to walk a weird way when hes in his suit”

• “do they ever chafe in their suits”

• “yes ned. we’re stocked up on baby powder”

• which you didnt mind bc it felt nice telling the truth

• ned WANTED TO TELL PETER SO BAD

• “ned no, i don’t want him to think of me differently”

• he understood. but still defended peter and said that hed still treat you the same

• anyway,,, peter started showing up with bruises and stuff which had you v concerned

• “pete what’s up? you’ve been avoiding ned and i and you have skipped out on every movie night since sophomore year started”

• “t’s nothing. dont worry ab it”

• “peter cmon, it’s just me”

• you figured maybe it had to do with ben??? but you gave him his space. you just wanted to be there for him yanno. you didnt want him to shut you out

• “Y/N I SAID ITS NOTHING. FOR FUCKS SAKE CAN YOU LEAVE ME ALONE???” he snapped (and not in the good way)

• and this was on your way to class so the whole hallway heard

• ouch

• so you left him alone. probably more than he meant. but it hurt

• i mean he was your first friend here, and now he yelled at you to leave you alone

• ned felt awful at first. trying to comfort you and tell you it wasnt your fault

• but then he started acting weird. whenever you brought up peter hed be super antsy about it

• you- “i think he got into another fight or something”

• ned- “pFFT PETER? FIGHTING? no way,,, i got-i gotta go”

• so you figured that whatever peter was hiding, ned knew about,, which also hurt your feelings

• so you closed off

• and wow could the super family tell something was wrong

• wanda- “little stark, i can feel your sadness all the way to my room”

• sam/bucky/rhodes- “okay what’s the deal, we’ve played 5 rounds of fortnite and you havent once rage quit even though you’re doing terrible”

• tony- “kid, what’s wrong? everyone here can tell you’re not feeling great”

• nat- “cmon. ive given you 3 opportunities to kick my ass and you havent once complained about me going easy?”

• thor- “lady y/n what is causing you distress? not once have you smiled, i even wore my hair in pigtails,,, and that seems to always do the trick”

• and you gave the same response every time “‘m just tired” “lots of homework”

• they noticed you werent going out on weekends anymore

• so tony figured that your friend group and you were having some Stuff

• pep gave him an idea of meeting his new prodigy

• now tony knew it’d be kinda sus because peter went to midtown but he figured that if the kid kept his mask on it’d be fine

• “dad i don’t wanna see another one of your weird maid robots”

• “wha- no i want you to meet someone”

• “dad college isn’t for another 2 years. if it’s your friend from MIT-“

• then right before your eyes was the insect boy that youve been admiring through the internet

• needless to say

• your jaw dripped

• “y/n meet spiderling, spiderling meet my daughter y/n stark”

• *seconds pass*

• “i uh- oH- um- sp-spidERman, h-hi. biG fan of you- your work”

• *silence*

• you- “oH dad diD you hear th-that? moM is calling mE”

• tony- “what?? pep wouldve called on the interco-“

• spiderman- “y/n”

• you- SHOOK TO THE CORE BECAUSE YOU KNEW THAT VOICE. THAT WAS THE VOICE THAT SOUNDED LIKE HONEY BUT COULD CUT YOU DEEPER THAN ANY WEAPON IN YOUR HOUSE

• you- “p-peter???”

• tony- *shocked pikachu face* “you know each other???”

• you- “so-something like that yeah”

• peter takes off his mask

• “ohmygodpeterisspiderman”

• “ohmygodyourlastnameisntsmith”

• tony- “im gonna let you guys figure this out” *walks backward slowly*

*insert silence*

• you- “so this is what you were hiding, huh?” with a cold tone

• “IM HIDING? YOU LIED ABOUT YOUR WHOLE HOME LIFE TO NED AND I”

• *yelling at each other for another minute. even though you couldnt hear what the other is saying*

• you- *yelling loudest “I DIDNT WANT YOU TO SEE ME DIFFERENTLY OKAY”

• peter- “you really thought id do that?” (heartbreaking voice)

• you- “i- once i got to know you, i knew you wouldnt but i was scared. i didn’t know how to tell you. for once in my life i had found someone my age who liked ME for ME. not for my name or money or my dad. and i didn’t want to change that. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you sooner”

• peter- “... i get what you mean. after ben died everyone gave me that look. except you and ned.”

• you- “why didn’t you tell me”

• peter- “everyone i love or ever cared about dies. my parents and then my uncle ben. so once i got my abilities i knew that the risk was even higher and i didn’t want to put you in that position. i wanted to keep you safe. but it seems like you know how to handle yourself” (referring to the fact that you grew up with THE EARTHS MIGHTIEST HEROS)

• y/n- “so how come ned found out?”

• peter *scratches back of neck* “well- he- i- May let him in my room and i happen to be crawling on the ceiling in my suit and he dropped the death star” *head hangs in shame*

• you had to giggle at that i mean CMON

• you stepped closer to him

• “pete you’re my best friend. you can tell me anything okay?”

• “no more secrets?”

• “no more secrets”

• and you both pinky promise and your thumbs “kiss” bc IF THEY ITS THE ULTIMATE UNBREAKABLE VOW DONT @ ME

• peter parker gives you the biggest hug that maKES YOUR HEART JUMP BC PHYSICAL CONTACT WITH A PERSON AS PRETTY AS HIM MAKES YOUR HEART FEEL A CERTAIN WAY

• but you wrapped your arms around his neck and enjoyed the moment

• wow he is really cozy

• * the avengers are watching from the cameras in awe*

• led to MANY questions at dinner

• and so everything went back to “normal”

• it wasn’t until you went to bed that night that you realized peter said the L word

• WHAT

• so much for no secrets

taglist: @silver-winter-wolf @emmmmszy @everythingaboutnothingsstuff @rexorangecouny @wishiwasanavenger @marjoherbo @nologinisoksothatsit @mindset-jupiter @hpnjrph @soup238

some favs/mutrals: @h-osterfield @starksparker @stuckonspidey @sunshinehollandd @keepingupwiththeparkers @hey-marlie @spyder-bites

[dcschain]

NONVERBAL RP STARTERS. | accepting.

@morghulis​ asked: Wipe away my muse’s tears.

At night he finds that what he thought he had learned was not a serviceable lesson, had been found lacking by his conscience and his heart, had, in blunt terms, been a placebo at best and a fucking lie at worst. 

He thought, before this night, that he had learned. A painfully, horribly, difficult lesson, but he had put himself to it and he had learned. It had made its way into his bones whether he wanted it or not, whether he could handle it, kicking and screaming. But it was there, settled. It was there: the knowledge of experiencing grief. He had nursed it into something serviceable to him in those long, dusty years, alone in the desert, and he thought it was a serviceable thing to him still.

Then Eddie had died.

The lesson he thought he had been able to learn was nothing. Nothing, in the face of that, of Susannah’s screaming and Cuthbert watching his own death mirrored back at him, and Jake who had already been offered as sacrifice once and understood now the other kind of sacrifice that comes not with your own death, but the death of your heart. Or the beginning of it.

If he closes his eyes, he hears the gunshot and the yelling, and he hears Eddie’s last words to him calling him father and he sees nothing but darkness, the metal in his mouth the bitter taste he woke up to after Jericho, and if he goes even further back, allows for the bite to take full hold of him and the sweetness and the agony, he sees beaded braids, blue eyes in the shadows. A bitter loneliness he trained himself to call acceptance.

And at the centre of it, not a tower, but this: his son of eleven years old, with his limbs askew in ways no body should be, and his mouth full of blood, and Roland tears himself up from the pillow with a breath too sharp to be real. 

Oy doesn’t sleep. In the blue-bitter light coming in from outside his motel room, the billy-bumbler’s chest moves slowly, regularly, exhausted by grief. He sees him stare at him, his snout resting on his paws, Jake in every slow blink, and next time Roland breathes the breath is sandpaper, the pain is throat, the grief is water, water, water, that never knew how to give him peace unless in Kingstown and now will never give him peace again, he never searched for it, he’ll never have it.

In the semidarkness: faces. Too many to count. He sees them start to congregate at the foot of the bed, by the bedside table, where the bathroom is. 

Some he can barely name. Others he knows too well.

He opens the motel room door. It barely creaks, and even if it does, he knows how to weigh sounds so they don’t echo or reverberate, catch them in slow, tender hands, calloused hands, and nurse them into silence before anyone can hear. It is like turning the body into something else: perhaps a weapon. He never stopped to think about it long enough to realise it.

Oy stands up, and follows. He did not ask him to but perhaps like for him the room is crowded, crowded with faces, or scents, or thoughts. He does not know what billy-bumblers dream of, nor what their nightmares taste like, and figures Oy knows even less about Roland’s dreams, anyway. The only moment he had flown, brief as a heartbeat, was when Jake had switched them, put himself in Oy’s body and vice-versa, to escape the traps beneath the Dixie Pig. There Oy had known something closer to starlight and full thought, beyond the falling angel and the rising ape.

With the door closed the faces are gone, and it’s better, it keeps the rot inside him where he knows how to quell it. But he can’t. Not this pain, this final, ending pain that has changed, changed him and the quest and the tet, the tet most of all. 

He hears the door to Arya’s room open, like the real world grating against his dream one where men more than six feet tall can open doors without a sound (this Where always unable to envelope him completely, unable to hold him like something part of it. Bodies may inhabit, but reality knows blood better than any eyes ever could), and he hears her footsteps. Not-Arya. Other-Arya. 

He wonders if she understands. Bright in some dream, the notion of a second life like sweat on naked skin. It’s a thought that barely breaks the surface.

What ink-black darkness pain makes. What Black Thirteen. What uselessness of language and of thought. 

“What’re you doing out here?”

He moves too slowly for comfort and wraps his own words around her question so softly. His blue eyes tear open the dream, spill out the pain like a broken vessel under the skin, like a bruise, yellow and purple on the brink of his heart. They fixate on her face. They ask her, despite himself, to bear witness. To his pain. To his emptiness. To the price, to the terrible price, like sugar in water to cover the cyanide flavour, that one must pay to the gun and the Tower and the singing red roses. 

He seems to think a thousand miles away in the blink of an eye. Somewhere where time has no meaning anymore. Where a desert is a desert is eternity, is the sea in any other name. Where things overlap, and the only word with one meaning is death. Death, which cannot be taken back or bargained with. Death. Death, the only thing that flows forward.

He is dim, between one world and the next. Had she the Touch, she’d see him thin too thin to be real, stretched against the ribs of her reality like skin on a starving man’s skull. The stomach too small to hold any food anymore. Maybe water.

“I’m afraid to go to sleep. I’m afraid my dead friends will come to me, and that seeing them will kill me.”

The flicker of the lights: the parking-lot lights, the light like a ghost from her room, an ectoplasmic manifestation of technology, the small version of the human hubris that destroyed his world before it was his.

“Would it help if I sat down next to you?”

The question he answers with a nod. She sits gingerly like the air around them will break. Again, the brief bright thought: that some bodies simply understand, the knowledge intrinsic tied to the bones allows them to know they are a copy of a copy, that there is another version, another heart, the same eyes, the same bright thread beneath the skin. A prayer to a creature that perhaps created them, or that they simply thought had created them, as a way of comfort. It doesn’t matter: the reality is split anyway.

Roland swallows and blinks too hard when her palm touches his cheek. His wet cheek, he realises now, because his sons are dead, and he will have to look his husband and daughter-in-law in the eye, this family of five that now is three (and Oy) and the thought is a deadshroud, a death-shroud, a dead thing. 

Chary-dinh.

Though he isn’t. Not anymore. That is why it hurts so much, the bitter realness of it, twisted inside him. A red dripping knife. 

She smiles the tender wolf’s smile. Her thumb catches the tears without even wanting to, as Roland cries without sobbing but simply lets the grief, slow, drip past him, through him like a wave.