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ramĂŠ
love.
a word everyone spells as l-o-v-e, except one certain young sorcerer â to whom it appears h-a-p-p-y, to whom it appears h-a-v-o-c â to whom it appears the shape of the letters of your name.
you, on the other hand, forget how to spell when the same word is before you â a fact which, your admirer reckons, would have been a major problem were he not he â that is, were he not the one and only 'gojo satoru'.
and thus begins, the plan.
and thus begins, the six steps to catch one's crush's eye â by the six eyes.
pairing: gojo satoru x fem!reader
tags: set during gojo's past arc; childhood friends to lovers; pining-since-forever!gojo; oblivious-since-forever!you; tooth-rotting fluff; adorable banter; height difference; all your friends ship satoru & you; they all are very tired of you both as well; satoru & you-hashtag [not-canon-yet] relationship goals; angry protective gojo; hell lots of teasing; misunderstandings; arguments; angst with a VERY HAPPY ending
wc: 12k+ (i'm genuinely so proud of this, guys(gn) :D)
notes: decided to republish my most popular fic so far to celebrate my blog crossing 1000 followers! tysm for all the love and support u hv shown me, besties!!! <333 btw, jjk isn't mine. dividers by @/inklore. hope u enjoy reading this!
|1/6| overhaul your wardrobe.
a low whistle leaves gojo as he appraises himself in the mirror.
snow white hair neatly trimmed with short bangs, sunglasses from gucci giving a peek of his transfixing blue gaze, a fitting tom ford white shirt paired with black slacks and designer shoes, and, to top it all off, a perfume by bleu de chanel he bought especially for today...
there's no way in hell you won't find him attractive today.
with a smug smirk, the first-year swings the door to his dorm wide open, ready to astound the two waiting outside with his insanely good looks - and pauses, boisterous shout dying within his throat.
"'toru!!" you exclaim as you jump off the balustrade you were seated on and rush to him, a wide grin splitting your face into half. "surprise, i caught an earlier train!"
in spite of the shock, the boy feels his lips lift in a smile.
it's been nearly a year since the last time the two of you were face-to-face; you're still as beautiful as you were then.
"hey shortie," the words leave him in a whisper as you wrap your arms around him - only for a pained 'ouch!' to escape him a second later. massaging his side where you pinched him, the boy watches you step back with a scowl. (faux, of course.)
"call me that one more time and no one can save you from my wrath."
"wrath?" chuckling, gojo bends a bit to be your eye-level. you narrow your eyes at him. "you think that can scare me? the gojo satoru?"
"it sure can," folding your arms across your chest, you throw him a smirk in the next instant. "if it makes me share all the mochi i bought with ieiri senpai and geto senpai, and not give you the tiniest bit of it."
eyes widening behind glasses, a gasp escapes him. "you wouldn't!"
"i would," you answer, the same smirk as before still on your lips.
gojo backs off.
you're nothing if not awfully determined to make your promises see the light of the day. if he continues pestering you, the young sorcerer knows he'll actually not get a single morsel of those delicious sweets.
"you know what," a familiar voice cuts in through his thoughts and the boy twists to find his best friend walking towards him. sending him a discreet wink (which he deems is 100% suspicious), suguru reaches your side and continues, "satoru here was really excited about you coming to meet him."
"oh, is it so?" your smirk gives way to an angelic smile. gojo wishes it was directed at him instead of that long-haired bastard.
"yeah," said bastard meanwhile agrees with an overeager nod. "shoko and i too were really excited to meet the girl our friend is so infa-"
a tense silence befalls the corridor when suguru abruptly stops in the middle of the sentence. gojo swears if you weren't standing there, in front of them, he would have murdered his friend in cold blood today.
"infa-?" you prompt, smile dropping a little as your confused gaze darts from one to the other. gojo forces a chuckle out.
"it's nothing, don't you worry," he tries to draw your attention away, when shoko swoops in, like the savior she is (gojo decides to buy her one month's supply of cigarettes) and inquires, "hey, you haven't seen satoru in months, right? any change you find in him?"
that seems to be the trick. a curious glint shines in your eyes as they travel up and down his figure - appreciatively for sure, the boy says to himself. you too seem to have a liking for expensive things, after all.
after two seconds of close inspection, you turn to shoko with a bright smile. gojo's soul goes soaring at the sight in the clear skies above.
"nope! he's the same old 'toru i've always known."
gojo's soul crashes down upon the earth, splintering at the impact.
his two classmates give him a look before shoko asks again, a mild disbelief to her tone, "you really don't find anything new about him? like, maybe he has grown taller? or maybe, more handsome?"
"anything else which you never even expected, maybe?" suguru pipes in from beside him. gojo shoots him a grateful look, all past offenses already forgiven and forgotten.
a beat passes before you shake your head. "nope. nothing about him is new. though, when you speak about unexpected..." you trail off with a contemplative look.
shoko encourages you, "when we speak about unexpected-"
"i never expected you to be so pretty," you finish the sentence for her with a small smile. gojo's jaw drops to the ground. okay, what the fu-
"oh," shooting him an amused smirk, shoko faces you. "and why is it so? why did you not expect me to be so pretty?"
"it's not my fault," you reply, sending him an accusatory glance as you continue, "when i asked 'toru if his new classmates are good-looking, he said they aren't. he said you all look really plain."
"do you find me plain or handsome?" suguru butts in, ignoring the blue-eyed glare boring holes into the side of his head.
"you're plain," the short reply comes in an instant from you - and even in the midst of his gloom for going unnoticed, gojo finds it within himself to smirk at his best friend's withered face.
in the meantime, you continue speaking to shoko, unperturbed.
"yeah, so imagine my surprise when i met you at the torii gates earlier today. with such a stylish bobcut, cute face and flawless skin... i really thought you were a model, ieiri-senpai."
you pause for a second - undoubtedly to catch your breath from that non-stop chatter; gojo knows your habits like his own by now - then ask the girl who's watching you with a pleased expression, an excited grin threatening to bloom on your face, "are you a model, senpai?"
said senpai lets out a chuckle in response.
and despite feeling dispirited (and very, very jealous of that shoko for hogging all your attention), the white-haired boy cracks a fond smile, watching you be so cheery.
yeah, you certainly are one very dense dumbass.
but, he too is gojo satoru - and he will get his feelings across to you.
|2/6| display your strengths.
being a show-off is what gojo's the best at - besides yearning for you from afar, that is.
a wide grin stays on his face as he watches you approach him, a tad ahead of your classmates - two boys, nanami kento and haibara yu.
being in the first year, neither of you three can take part in the kyoto sister-school goodwill event - that doesn't stop you all from being spectators, though - which is what's enough for the gojo's plans.
a call of his name drags him away from gazing at you - you look good in that tee of his, you accidentally shrunk in the laundry - and twists back to find his teacher frowning at him.
the second-year finds it hard to wear the same grin. "yo yaga sensei, what's up?"
the man lets out a long-drawn sigh.
"don't overdo it, satoru," he says - the boy opens his mouth, ready to retort with a quip - only to be stopped by an unfamiliar expression overcoming the teacher's features.
it's a horrific insult of a smile, the young sorcerer realizes after a beat.
yaga, meanwhile, continues with that same expression, "i too was young once. i can understand what you're going through now - which is why i won't stop you from showing your talents to her or whatever. just... remember no one should die."
a quiet nod is all the boy manages in reply, too overwhelmed for a bit by the fatherly care yaga insists on giving him despite the annoyance suguru and he equally insist on being to their sensei.
with a pat on the shoulder, yaga leaves in the direction of the other faculty and staff. schooling his expression, gojo shoots suguru a look.
"hey suguru, how did yaga get to know about me and her?"
"who is her, gojo senpai?" a sweet voice chips in, soon followed by your teasing grin floating into his line of vision.
the boy averts his gaze for a beat - flustered by the sheer proximity between both of your faces which could be closed were he not such a coward, stop smirking, suguru - before sending you a wounded look.
"since when did i become gojo senpai to you?"
"since today," you reply with a tight smile. gojo doesn't like it one bit on your face. "i've been asked by the higher-ups to act professional with you."
a moment passes - wherein the boy registers the statement - before red flashes in his vision. placing his hands on your shoulders, he asks, or rather, demands to know, "did they hurt you? or threaten you? give me their names. who were those fucking bastards?"
brows furrowing, you place your much smaller hands atop his. "relax. nothing happened," you whisper, so quiet only he can hear it, "they don't have the guts or power to hurt or threaten me. all they told me is to, i quote, refrain from calling you such terms of endearment again. and i was like, okay."
a small smile settles on your lips as you take his hands in yours and start rubbing circles into them. the boy feels a lot of his tension drain away. smile brightening (you too seem to have realized the effects of this gesture on him), you add, "plus, it's only four years. once we've both graduated, i can get back to calling you whatever i want to call. those old geezers can't direct me then."
"they still can't now..." gojo begins - then stops.
with that bootlicker eldest brother you have, those old rats can now.
you give him a tired smile, words unneeded to confirm that the both of you are indeed cursing the same set of people now.
you open your mouth to say something - funny probably, if the shine in your eyes was anything to go by - before a muted cough pops the bubble you two had unconsciously slipped into.
and with an entertained smirk at the boy, who immediately seperates your linked hands, shoko informs, "sensei's calling for you, gojo. the competition's about to begin."
acknowledging her with a brief nod, gojo returns his focus to you, looking for a sliver of fear or anxiety in your face - one he'll soothe away with a gentle smile and maybe, just maybe, a forehead kiss - only for all his dreams to be dashed in the dirt.
you're peering up at him, beaming excitedly.
"go, beat 'em, senpai," you cheer him with a fist pump. an amused snicker sounds somewhere behind. your zeal doesn't budge one bit. "go, kick those kyoto students' asses. i know you will win."
and win, your white-haired senpai does - nothing new it it.
and you too seem to be very happy at it - again nothing new in it.
'cause when do you not congratulate him with a blinding beam every time the boy is successful - be it at making those pretty origami stars the way you taught him to; or at defeating a weakass sorcerer in a lame match.
however what is new is the fact you've grown rather competitive - not that gojo minds it in the slightest, though. quite the contrary, in fact.
"aren't you being a little too confident?" you inquire, throwing him a peeved glance, "every opponent you face in the future won't be as weak as those two kyoto boys today. you sure you'll stay invincible then too?"
resting his chin on the chair he is straddling, the second-year smirks, "any way you can prove i won't, shortie?"
geto sends him a questioning look while ieiri looks away from them to the scenery outside, giving a long sigh. his other two kouhais, nanami and haibara, pause in their game of cards to look at you, confusedly.
gojo observes you ignore them, eyes trained on him only, lips curving slowly into a sharp grin. gods, can you get any lovelier than this?
"well..." you drawl, keeping your focus on him. a flush creeps up the sides of his neck, which he earnestly hopes goes overlooked by you.
it doesn't go overlooked by your too-serious classmate, though - gojo spots nanami's eyes widen for a mere instant before reverting to their typical indifference.
you continue, grin simmering to a daring smile now, "why don't you find it out on your own tomorrow? twelve noon. practice field. what do you think, senpai?"
the sorcerer pretends to take a moment to regard your proposal, then shrugs. "sure, why not? sounds good enough to me."
with a wordless nod, the boy watches you return to the video game you were playing with his best friend - then look back at him on your name being called. an eyebrow rises in silent question.
seeing that the cue, he asks, "but what will the loser have to do?"
the reply comes with a smirk, your eyes dropping to your game. "you can buy me the latest version of this game. that'll be fine, i guess."
gojo was wrong - said person realizes as he watches the orange-red glow seep in through the window and render you an ethereal glow.
your competitiveness isn't the only thing new to him this evening.
your ability to make him even more head over heels for you than the boy already is (an impossible feat, really, given the chains and locks guarding him within, apart from the layer of infinity without)...
...this is yet another new thing gojo learns about you, this evening.
|3/6| gather info on your crush.
"oh, you wouldn't want to be friends with her."
the comment cuts through the air with a noisy chuckle and a raucous chorus of giggles - gojo's knuckles grow white with the painfully tight grip he has on the glass of mocktail.
suguru shoots him a contrite face from the other side of the crowd, mouthing an apology with a helpless shrug. the boy looks away from his best friend to throw a glance at the two girls a few seats away.
a beat passes wherein shoko and utahime share a brief look, and the former speaks up, an odd edge to her voice as she leans forwards, a smirk directed at the boy. "and why wouldn't geto? she seems like a pretty nice girl to be friends with."
your cousin scoffs. gojo seriously wishes there wasn't a strict rule set by his father for the clan members of not meddling in the other clans' matters, to maintain an image of neutrality and amiability.
(it's not like he prefers not to break rules or is afraid of his father, the boy thinks grimly as he gulps the last sip of his mocktail and returns the glass to the table with a thud. it's far from being either of those.
it's just that with a small response from him in this matter, you will be dragged under the elders' scrutiny; your friendship with him too will be - and that's something he would never wish upon you. so the boy stays quiet, opting to-)
"what the fuck did you just say?"
the chitter-chatter dies down to a deathly silence in an instant.
rising from his seat, gojo stalks towards the boy sitting on the couch. from the background, he can hear few voices urge him to stop, to get back, with repeated 'satoru, no' and 'satoru, relax' - but the boy finds not a cell in his body wanting to heed those voices. marching right up to your cousin, who shoots him a pathetically fake smirk now, the boy repeats himself, "what. did. you. just. say."
the target of the query huffs a chuckle, drunk and stinking - and your friend realizes now just how much of a diluted description of him you gave him the other day. the guy isn't just some petty irritating relative of yours, he is a fucking bastard.
a fucking bastard who's going to get beaten into a pulp, if he doesn't choose his next words wisely.
another chuckle leaves him, before he gets up from his seat, a slight sway to the action as he sneers at gojo. now, were the circumstances different, the white-haired boy is sure such a brazen person would've impressed him, who is the strongest sorcerer there is, but not today.
not when you're the one who is the innocent undeserving recipient of such a remark as the one he utters next.
"i just said, my cousin's a freak who can read someone's mind without them knowing - and she does that all the time for her sick enjoyment. no one can ever trust that bitch."
a fist connects with the side of your cousin's face and before anyone can realize what's happening, the two boys are rolling on the floor in a brawl, gojo obviously with the upper hand as he lands blow after blow and yell after yell on the other.
a quiet voice whispers to his conscience, chiding his response to the situation to be too harsh, too cruel - but no sooner does it appear than it is stomped down and shoved away by images from the past.
images of a little girl crying, yelling, screaming, eyes squeezed shut, how everything's so loud, how everyone's so noisy, how everyone just can't seem to stop talking of her - in the shocked silence of the party hall.
images of being informed over the phone, his friend won't be coming to play today either - for a class or a function or a cold, he cares the least for - before overhearing later at dinner, it's the fifth day the girl's been comatose since her last treatment.
images of brash celebrations revelling in the discovery and return of a technique, long thought lost - the new messiah, they exclaim - while the said person looks at the elders with face steeped in what, the boy doesn't need his six eyes to know, is terror.
images of a girl, saying in a surprisingly void tone, how horrible, how terrible, how despicable a weapon they've made her into - sneaking into people's minds to steal the meaning of their lives away - before giving a suggestion, too smart, too sharp for a girl of ten; although-
"satoru!"
the singular word snaps the sorcerer's thoughts into two, making him move his irate gaze away from the bloodied face of the bitch to the door-
oh.
it's you.
you, standing in the school uniform, a bag slung over your shoulders.
you, eyes round and lips parted as you stare at the scene before.
you, who takes only a second before you rush forwards, moving him away from your cousin, worried gaze raking over his features instead of the bruised wailing mess of a relative left behind.
"'toru," the word escapes you in a whisper as you maneuver him into sitting on the couch.
another voice wafts over to him, a lot like suguru's, but he pays it no mind, wanting to focus on you and you only, while your fingers travel over his face, brush his bangs away, tuck them behind the shell of his ear, then finally come to a rest on the apple of his cheeks, the grazing of the thumb soothing a minor cut.
though the way your eyebrows furrow at it, emotions darting across your face a million a second, from confusion to concern to anger - gojo reckons, were anyone to see you now, they would think it ain't a tiny nick but a gaping wound.
the white-haired boy grasps your wrist in his fingers.
"i'm okay, shortie," the second-year reassures you in a whisper. you peer at him closely in turn for a beat longer, before a long sigh leaves you though the frown on your lips stays the same. he would've called you cute if not for the murderous intent rolling off you in waves...
gojo decides to call you hot now.
a seething gaze with a soft "what happened, 'toru?" reaches him next.
oh yes, gojo swoons inwardly, you're being so fucking hot.
nuzzling into the palm cradling his cheek, the boy smiles. "nothing you need to worry about."
"it's your cousin," a female voice butts in before a known pair of heads walk into his vision, one smoking a cigarette while the other looks at him then you, mildly stunned.
shoko continues, as laidback as ever (as if she too wasn't glowering then), "suguru there asked him something about you to which the pig replied with some nonsense, because of which satoru here jumped in to defend your honour." your eyes travel from her to him. a whoosh of air leaves the girl and she takes a long drag from a cigarette. "nothing very serious, to be honest..."
"but nothing too unserious either," utahime adds, which earns a small nod from her girlfriend, "if the asshole dares to lie about you once-"
"what's to say he won't again," you finish the sentence for her, a dark shadow looming over your face, then throw the culprit a harsh look. "and what shit did you spout, mr. resident douchebag of the clan?"
a corner of gojo's lips quirk up at the nickname you gave, then part in a grin at the reaction your cousin gave to that. embarassed, for sure, yet never going farther than glaring at you from those swollen eyes.
if you weren't standing here, caressing his face, your friend's certain, he would have gone to tear him a new one - the latter still scowling at you whilst intermittently yelping at the pain of his wounds.
a long sigh escapes you, visibly tired and annoyed.
"i know you can hear me just fine by that stink eye you're giving me, so fess up now - what the fuck were you telling about me?"
an absolute silence answers your question, and just when gojo thinks he might have to leave your warm cocoon to go beat your cousin up, again, suguru's voice sounds from beside, "he was talking about your CT."
"oh?" a brow rises. "and what about it?"
"apparently - and i quote," the long-haired boy adds with palms raised and faced forwards, at the scowl he shoots him, "you can read others' minds without their knowledge, and you do that always. for fun, your cousin claims."
you blink, and turn to your relative; a mask, gojo observes with a hint of melancholy, slipping over your features - not that the boy blames you, though. you need a mask - now, most of all times.
"you said that, aniki?" you inquire, the caressing hand over gojo's skin stilling with a slight tremor. he envelopes your hand in his; an action you respond to with a squeeze, continuing, "but why did you? after all that happened, after all that everyone in the family knows, why?"
a stubborn scoff sounds from the other end of the room; one of the six eyes twitches in its socket.
"i don't think you should ask this question, shortie," the second-year hums, pulling a nonplussed face from you. he grins, "you can simply read his mind, no? your aniki won't be forced to give a reply; your ask too will be answered. besides, this isn't gonna be the first time you're breaking into someone's mind, and, your cousin's not even gonna feel his mind being read - a painless procedure - isn't that right, aniki?"
"fuck no!!!!"
and bingo!
gojo watches you cast a long look at him, then back at your cousin, before a slow smile spreads on your features, the glint so dear to him making a comeback in your eyes.
"not a bad idea, senpai," you say, lifting your free hand and directing it at the culprit. a few gasps sound around you, soon followed by a few murmurs - your senpai watches them slide off your skin like water off a duck's back. you announce in a sing-song fashion, "well, here goes nothing~"
then stop at the anguished cry, your smile widening into a grin.
sweet and smug, like the cat who got the canary.
gojo feels three pairs of eyes look at his smirk, all at the same time - the boy lets them look. the two of you share dynamics, the nature of which none, except you two, can ever dream of comprehending.
wailing, your cousin rises and stumbles over to you, hands folded in a pleading gesture.
"please, no, no, no," he sobs, very nearly falling at your feet before you take a step backwards, disgust overtaking your grin, sending the boy reeling back. "i beg you, no. please don't kill me. i was just kidding; it was just a joke. i'm sorry, don't kill me."
"kill you?" you let out a shocked gasp, placing a hand over your chest, "i would never. i was just trying to read your mind, aniki. why on earth would that kill you? you won't even feel anything-"
"it's the binding vow, you bitch!!" the boy spits, interrupting you, "the one you took years back, 'cause you didn't want the higher-ups to use you as a spy again; giving up the element of secrecy of your CT to-"
your cousin pauses, the realization and the ensuing horror and regret dawning over his face; gojo presses him, sharing a smile with you.
"to?"
the answer arrives as a shuddered whisper - a whisper audible to all, however, thanks to the heavy silence in the room.
"to make it lethal on its victim instead; an attack none can stop, not even a special-grade."
the crash of a glass, or five, impacting with the ground sounds; you give a satisfied nod, smirking.
gojo runs a palm over your dishevelled hair, undoubtedly from driving with the windows down to this stupid meet of the teenagers from the jujutsu clans. you give him a smile, mouth opening to say something, but he doesn't let you. "don't thank me, stupid."
"okay," you acquiesce, a slight huff to your tone before it grows softer, "but can i at least say you were being very cool then? i'm impressed."
"who's impressed with whom?" a crass voice interrupts the moment before gojo can even form it entirely between the two of you.
three - nope, five (even your classmates are here, tch!) teasing smiles float into his vision; the second-year opens his mouth to throw back a retort - except you snatch the opportunity away from him.
"i'm impressed with gojo senpai- any problems, anyone?" you say, tilting your head to one side with the cutest little furrow in the midst of your brows. all five shake their heads, smiles widening before one of them falls on your next words.
"but the next time i see you, geto senpai, asking others what sort of a person i am - don't you dare deny it, you asked two of my friends too the same thing, they told me; god knows why you need my character certificate, though, and for whom; you're acting as if you've a sibling i wish to date and you wanna know everything about me before giving the green signal, but whatever it is, senpai-"
you heave a breath, a break from your tirade - while the remainder of the room's breathing stays suspended.
gojo glances away from you to find the attention of all the attendees fixed on you. he wraps an arm around your midsection and rests his chin on your shoulder. you lean the side of your head onto his.
"i promise i'll create problems for you, more if i see gojo senpai being dragged into the aftermath of your curiosity - okay?"
gojo watches his best friend look at you, terrified, for a second before turning to throw him a glare. the white-haired boy bites back a grin.
placing hands on his hips, suguru exclaims, "you know what, i tried to help but no one here is worthy of my assistance."
"no one asked you for this help, suguru," shoko interjects smoothly, "you were the one who insisted, something about this method being the most effective or something if they want to catch her attention-"
"whoa, whoa, whoa. who wants to catch my attention?" you inquire, cutting them two off. gojo's classmates stop and the blood flowing in his veins drops to a subzero as he cranes his neck to look at you.
you twist to look back at him. "is there someone who wants to catch my attention? do you know them?"
"i-uh-um," the boy stutters, mind scrambling for a reply - something, anything - before nanami interrupts, a small smile on his face, "yeah, there is someone, actually, and we all know him. geto senpai was just gathering some data on you as his wingman."
"oh," you mutter, gaze dropping to the ground, then lifting to gojo. the boy simply blinks back, which draws a frown from you in turn.
retrieving a pair of shades from your bag, you hand it to him and turn back to suguru, a barely-there smile on your lips.
"next time he wants some info on me, ask him to ask me directly. i'll appreciate it."
"noted, boss," the words escape gojo before the addressed can even reply, utterly unmoved by the five exasperated glares [honestly, it's four: haibara can never really glare at anyone] - the next step of the plan already whirring to life in the shades-donning boy's brain.
so, so giddy at the fact of being told of the golden key to your heart.
|4/6| gather info from your crush.
"the moon is beautiful, isn't it?"
"so are you."
a long minute passes between gojo and you, gazes fixed on the other person and only them, before you lick your chapped lips - the boy's attention instantly going to that hynotic motion of your tongue...
and you pinch his arm.
"ow shortie!!!! what the fuck was that for!?!?" the boy yells, massaging the sore spot on his arm, before out of nowhere, the red signal glows green and he has to shift his focus to the steering wheel.
you toss him a mad scowl from the passenger's seat, one he catches effortlessly, winking, when an observation crashes upon him and he coos. "aww, did my itty-bitty-shortie-baby just get flustered by me? aww, is she blushing? aww, she's so cute!!!"
"i asked you to help me learn how to confess, gojo," you grumble with a glare at him, "not make fun of me."
your co-passenger makes an affronted face at your words, although, internally, he is beside himself. and to be honest, how can he not?
you're in the same car as him, on a three hour long drive from tokyo to nikko, exchanging declarations of love with one another while the boy's (spare) shades slide down the bridge of your nose and he hums along to the songs you choose on the stereo... if a few facts are being ignored (like the one where this is your mission and the two of you are in your uniforms), the second-year can totally imagine the two of you going on a weekend getaway as a couple now.
a soft smile settles on his lips, as he sneaks a glance of you from the corner of his eyes. "i wasn't trying to make fun of ya, shortie," he says, "i was just responding to your statement."
"but that directly?" you ask, shock and embarrassment flooding your face. your friend stifles a chuckle. "i commented on the moon being beautiful. you should've said something like 'it is, isn't it?' - but no, you went and replied, 'so are you'. my admirer will never be so direct with me; why don't you try to understand that simple fact?"
there are a few days when gojo is really divided between wanting to flick your forehead hard and wanting to kiss you senseless.
today seems to be one such glorious day.
swerving the car onto a stop by the side of the road, he lets his head fall onto the steering wheel and lifts it to lock his eyes with yours.
"and what makes you think your admirer won't be a direct guy?"
"the fact the guy couldn't even show his face to me once, and did not even want to share his contact details with me, despite me pestering him via suguru and nanami, for ages now."
okay, ouch, that one's on him.
yet, never being the one to accept defeat, he throws back, "and what if he wants to build up some mystery before your first meet? you love mysteries, don't you? the guy likes you; he must be trying to use that knowledge to confess to you."
"i like only murder mysteries, 'toru," your deadpan response arrives in a beat, which then evolves into curiosity when you ask, "but how do you know so much about these things? how many relationships have you been in, 'toru?"
it's gojo's turn to grow embarrassed now. hand reaching out to fiddle with the bracelet on your wrist, he answers, "zero."
"hey, don't be embarrassed," he watches you shoot him a grin. a tiny smile is all he manages to return while you continue, "i too have never been in a relationship. anyone you ever confessed to?"
"isn't that evident from my previous answer?"
"nope! you might've gotten rejected; who knows~"
the grin on your lips widens; gojo looks at it for once before dropping his gaze. under the interplay of the light and shadow from the leaves of the tree, there appears to be something different about you - the sorcerer can't really pinpoint what it is but he knows there is, and he doesn't want to dwell on it - lest he loses his self-control.
"i have never confessed to anyone, and whatever confessions i have received, i've either ignored or rejected them all."
"ooh, same!" your excited voice ringing within the confines of the car, you lift his palm to meet yours in a hi-five. gojo lets you do so - before you place it between your two palms and clasp it, a sharp gasp drawn from him at the action. you shoot him a concerned look.
"your hand's freezing cold, 'toru? you okay?"
"yeah, yeah, i'm fine," the boy mumbles, moving his hand away from your comforting warmth - an action he doesn't want to do but has to, for the sake of propriety. something happening out of sheer impulse isn't how he wants to start his story with you - you don't deserve that.
"um, okay," you mutter, then inquire, timid and awkward, "i've one last question on your love life... can i ask that? you can totally ask me to stop though if you're feeling uncomfortable."
"ask away," the boy answers with a smile, he can see, is tense in the mirror as he restarts the car and returns it to the road. a long second passes before you ask, "have you ever liked anyone, 'toru?"
"yeah... there's one girl. i love her."
"oh."
the monosyllabic answer sends a torsion through his chest and gojo twists towards you - only to find a cryptic smile resting on your lips.
discarding your shoes, you fold your knees upto your chest and rest your head atop them, facing him. your senpai is really thankful a soft song comes onto the stereo next, for were it not so, he's certain your soft question would have gone unheard.
"how does your first love feel? beautiful, right? the way it's in books, songs and movies... isn't it?"
gojo takes a moment to mull over your query.
it is... yet it isn't.
the flutters in his heart when you skip past him in the corridors with a beam; the butterflies in his stomach when you plop on the chair next to him in the cafeteria; the dizziness in his head when your face is too close to his; the utterly-unplatonic thoughts of you plaguing him, day and night, dusk and dawn...
the fictional works sure have got this aspect of love right.
but they aren't right in so many other aspects of it.
falling in love with you isn't love-on-first-crash nor is it from a magical transformation in one of you nor is it after ages and ages of ignorance and denial and the final mind-numbing feeling that oh shit! you're the one for him; always have been; the girls with whom he's been till now are mere mirages of you; but it's too late now... you're moving abroad on a flight in two hours, with a boyfriend who's far better than him.
no.
the goggles-wearing sorcerer's catching feelings for you is way more realistic and easier to digest than that.
the two of you are friends, friends, friends - until the morning the two of you are munching on an ice cream tub, and with a casual glance at you, the boy muses what he feels for you is weird, not like his feelings for his other friends - and after a month's worth research, reaches the conclusion of him being in love with you.
quick. direct. smart.
just like the heir of the gojo clan himself.
a small smile lining his lips on this short trip down the memory lane, your senpai hums, "it's complicated. you'll understand when you have your first love."
a soft sigh is the only response you give and gojo reaches over to give a small knock to the side of your head. "don't overthink, shortie," the boy says in a fond tone, a feeling which expands within himself at the smile you offer him, "everything's gonna be okay; i'll personally make sure it is."
"oh, yeah?" a brow rises while your eyes crinkle in a cheeky grin. "and how exactly do you plan on doing that? you gonna have a serious talk with my admirer or something, before our first date?"
if talks in the mirror over the bathroom sink counts, the white-haired boy has had countless discussions so far - but he doesn't tell you that - choosing to return your question with a question of his own.
one which has been pestering him for a while now.
"but, shortie... why the hell are you practising-"
"to confess now?" stealing his words from the tip of his tongue, gojo watches you let out a long tired exhale, then slump back in your seat, a hint of a smile on your lips. flying strands of your hair, from the wind rushing in through the open window, form a halo around your head-
your friend thinks you are an angel descended from above, no matter how you look.
a titter breaks his enraptured gaze on you, and he blinks, finding you with a tiny curve of your lips. you continue, "i wanna stay prepared. if not for this date, then another. if not for this guy, then another. but the thing is, i wanna stay prepared. for love and for everything that comes with it - besides..." your smile grows bashful, an emotion gojo instantly realizes is impossible for him to get tired of seeing on you; you shrug.
"the heart does what it wants, does it not?"
really??
the young sorcerer looks away from you for a beat, letting his gaze travel over the rows of trees dotting the increasingly mountainous terrain, then looks back at you.
the two of you are awfully close to the destination of your trip.
removing a hand from the wheel and reaching it out to intertwine his fingers with yours, the boy asks, "wanna go visit that patisserie i was talking of the other day after this mission? i've heard the sweets there are worth dying for."
"but won't it be late evening by the time our job's done?" you ask back with a frown, "and we also have to return to the school... why don't-"
"it's a full moon tonight, shortie," gojo interjects you with a soft little smile. you stare befuddled at him for a while, before the bulb lights to life in your brain - an event bringing a semblance of relief to the boy - and you laugh.
"oh, oh, oh!" you exclaim, waggling your eyebrows, "i know exactly what you're going to do. you're gonna create a romantic atmosphere to teach me how to confess, aren't you? method teaching - eh, 'toru?"
a chuckle is what gojo decides to offer to your buzzing curiosity, until later this evening.
"i'll let my heart do what it wants to do."
|5/6| splurge on gifts.
"and what can this be?"
the silver of the bracelet glints, the tiny sapphires in its rim adding a sparkling effect as you show it to gojo. the boy drags his gaze from it to you, lips pressing into a line as he takes in the way you're looking at him.
two months back, if someone even merely insinuated at the fact you might be growing distant from him, he wouldn't have thought once before retaliating with a mean word or hit.
and, to be just, why on earth would he not?
yes, the 'date' he had proposed to take you on post mission remained just a proposal - many thanks to the old geezers and their knack for providing severely understated mission details [bitter sarcasm wholly intended] - but that didn't drive a wedge between you both; quite the opposite, in fact.
two months back, he found you sobbing at his bedside in the school infirmary, lips pressing kisses to his bruised knuckles time and again, while you kept mumbling on how you should've been more wary and cognizant of your surroundings, how he shouldn't have switched his infinity off to guard you from the caving roof and how you would buy him a milion sweets if he promised to not be reckless, but wouldn't hesitate to kill him with your CT if he broke the promise even once.
lovingly overprotective in an irresistibly cute way - that's exactly how you grew to be around gojo in the days he was healing, in the latter's eyes. suguru and shoko's comments too grew less teasing and more encouraging with time then - something which made him think, the feelings in his being might not be as one-sided as he tends to believe at times.
something which made him think, there might not be a day he has to imagine without your radiant grin directed at him, for him, because of him.
yet, now... as he regards you with utmost attention...
the sorcerer can't help but deem the unimaginable to have occurred.
face grim, eyes dull, lips puckered into a scowl, every fucking time you've come across him since your return to school from your home...
it doesn't really take a genius to gather you don't really want to be in his vicinity - a realisation which leads to your best friend of a decade and a few years to shower a torrent of gifts on you.
under the impression, that's what will return your keen undivided gaze to him - an impression, he watches, being tainted wrong with every other second that passes under the fading daylight.
you return the bracelet to its box and place it in the bag, one the boy knows contains the other gifts he had left at your doorstep or sent via shoko or haibara to you, the past month - and one you intend to give him back - 'cause for what else could you have asked to meet him at the training grounds this evening, carrying the bag, if not this?
wishing, not for the first time, for his six eyes to be able to glean your current state of mind, he asks, scooting slowly, deliberately to your seated form on the bench, "did you not like it, shor-"
"please don't call me that."
the grin slowly unfurling on gojo's lips stutters, then vanishes in the heat of the fury of your eyes. he watches your gaze roam over his face once before skittering away. your voice grows a mild tremor, "please don't call me that. i don't want to hear that nickname ever again."
the soda can nearly slips from between his fingers onto the grass below before he grasps it again, firmer this time, and tosses it upside down to empty it into his mouth. it's a brand you had introduced him to, gojo reminisces, on a day just like this... grins and squeals as you jumped in front of the vending machine, so, so joyed that it had your favourite drink.
soon after, it became the white-haired boy's favourite drink too - but no longer now. not when the fruity tang of the liquid, which endeared it to you as you claimed, tastes like the metallic clang of blood to him.
now, many might call gojo overdramatic here - you've asked him not to call you that countless times now, for fuck's sake - but many don't know you the way your friend does. in horrifying contrast to before, a note of revulsion exists in your words.
undisguised disgust paired with loathing.
sharp enough to pierce infinity, past skin, muscles, ribs and layers of tissues and chains, into that stupid organ strumming melancholic rhythms now, your name bleeding raw from its walls.
superfluous, some might scoff - but they'll have never known there's a dark side to love, the one gojo's traversing now. though... the young sorcerer muses, finishing the drink and sending it into the trash can with a flick of his cursed energy, they'll never have known you. they'll never have known the degree to which the boy adores you, either.
a strong whoosh of wind hits the two of you, carrying the smell of wet earth with it. a sign of the arrival of your favourite season, your friend absently notes as he looks back at you.
the tip of your nose appears flushed red.
"and may i know why?"
shock brims your gaze at the soft question. gojo watches you cough up a strained chuckle. "i knew you to be more assertive. demanding. never thought you could request for an explanation... what changed, 'to-" you still for a beat, then continue, burning another bridge, same as the boy feared an instant too early, "i mean, gojo-senpai?"
"you're the best person to answer that," the mentioned person replies with lips forming a gentle curve. yes, the limitless user's always been one hell of a self-assured person - it comes free with the package of receiving god-like treatment by most from before you can crawl - but there exist times when all that - the fight, the zeal, the energy - every one of those just ebbs away from his body, rendering him the hapless spectator, and victim, to the car crash.
except a car crash might hurt less than the careless sneer you shoot his way, coupled with an eye roll. you never gave him such a look in the past, before you went back home for the vacation. just what-
"i think you know why i called you here, yeah?" you ask, picking the bag up and pushing it towards him. the things inside it rattle; the boy wonders if you even went through those two books he sent you. they were from the series you had babbled, ranted and gushed to him on for hours on end on numerous occasions, once upon a time.
gojo nods briefly, though doesn't spare it even a glance. it doesn't go past your notice, he notes, given the way your eyes jump from him to his gifts, then to your fiddling fingers. "well, that's one box ticked off," you say, "and as for the other-"
"i know that too; you need not say every fucking thing out loud," your senpai cuts you off with a mirthless inflection to his tone, eyes falling down onto his sneakers. it was a gift from you on his last-
bloody hell, why does everything have to be a sore reminder of you?
"not saying it out loud doesn't make it any less real," your quiet voice tears through his thought, and he looks up. hoping, desperately so, a tender smile is waiting on your features, reserved for him - only to see every hope of his get dashed into the dirt by your frown.
his best friend was right. gojo's pathetically down for you.
a thunder rumbles in the distance.
you continue, "but since you've asked me not to, i guess i won't. that's the least i can do-"
"but what went wrong?" the question hurtles past the confines of his mouth into the stormy air. and, for once, gojo decides not to conceal the moisture in his eyes behind his shades. removing the eyewear, he moves to sit right beside you, approaching to take your hand in his.
you jerk away from him.
as if you were fire and he, water.
as if you were sun and he, non-luminous scarred moon threatening to eclipse your joy.
the white-haired boy retracts his hand away. you glance at him once before averting your gaze away. he watches you clench your hands in a tight fist. "nothing was wrong, senpai," you mumble; gojo bites his lower lip to keep it from wobbling, "but there's always something tiny wrong in everything going right, ya know? i just feel we outgrew our phase of being friends."
the growl of thunder sounds closer this time. a drop of water lands on his thigh - the sorcerer doesn't bother to know if it is his eyes or those clouds above which finally welled over. voice thickening and breaking, a scoff leaves him, "you know, as well as me, that's the lamest excuse ever. and you called us being friends, right?" you take a moment then nod weakly. a pained sigh leaves him, "then what happened to being open with each other, hm? i thought we kept no secrets from each other."
the boy watches you keep your gaze stubbornly trained on the grass beneath. something within him breaks.
"c'mon, don't play dumb," gojo urges, plopping down onto the object of your attention, just so he can have a better view of your face. you face away with a frown. he prompts you again, hints of helplessness sneaking in between his words, "c'mon, shortie. don't look away with the shitty reason of us outgrowing our phase of friendship. we were - no, are the closest. you know, right? that you can tell me any-"
"not everything's meant to remain the same always, senpai!" the loud exclamation leaves your mouth. gojo stills and so do you. his eyes fall on the way you wring your hands once before stuffing them into your hoodie's pockets.
it isn't oversized on you, the realisation clicks into place in his mind.
you let out an exhale through your mouth, then pin him down with eyes teeming with what seems like weary distaste.
"can you please get up? you're creating an unnecessary scene right now."
if your words weren't enough, it's the way you utter them that leaves cracks and fissures in him. one more blow, and the boy's sure he'll be blown away into smithereens - an outcome he's trying to avoid [but knows, can't; every piece of armour he dons turns flimsy before you].
"is it 'cause you tended to my injuries then?" he asks. your lips strain into a line. casting him a sideways glance, you shake your head, "i'm many things but a liar ain't in the list, senpai. when i cared for you, it was from my heart. when i no longer wanna associate with you-"
a dark shadow falls over your features. rising from the bench, you shift your gaze skywards and back on him, "it'll rain pretty soon. you should get back inside."
there's something between summer evenings and you and him, gojo muses as he peers up at you.
it was a summer evening when you first came to visit the boy at this school.
it is a summer evening when you're turning your back on him in this same old school.
with the glaring exception of there being the warmth of your form beside him then versus the gnawing chill you're leaving behind now.
"you never completed your sentence," gojo points out, whispering.
[too loud and the sorcerer fears, the last interaction between the two of you will end as a horrid yelling match. besides, you like things with happy endings, don't you? he'll be sure to give you your happy ending as the last gift.]
you send a restrained twitch of lips his way. "i remember being asked not to say every fucking thing out loud, senpai."
a shaky smile is the only thing he finds he can muster in return, at the moment.
"suguru said you're leaving for your home tonight again," the student says, getting up from the ground and moving closer to, yet too far a distance from you. "don't drive with the windows down, okay? the weather's bad, you might catch a cold."
a muscle in your jaw twitches. the valley between your brows furrows.
gojo lets his smile widen a bit. so shallow. so hollow.
"don't worry," he says, "i'm taking this as seriously as you want me to. it's just that..." trailing off, the boy takes a step away. your feet move an inch towards him before you immediately withdraw them. a small mimicry of a laugh leaving him, gojo fixates his gaze on the iridescent colour of your irises.
"i've always seen you as someone way more than a mere childhood friend, y'know? and no matter what you say or do, i can never and will never stop seeing you the same way. i love you that much, short- oh! sorry, i'm not supposed to call you that, am i?."
a beat passes, then another, and another.
your response comes out as a garbled mess of letters and tears. "you're the worst person ever, 'toru. i hate you."
and with that and not another glance wasted anywhere, you whirl on your feet and dash back to the school.
leaving behind the echo of your words ringing in gojo's ears, louder than the thunder of the lightning crashing on a tree a little away.
|6/6| this isn't really a way. if you're at this step, just fuckin' stop and retreat. your crush won't ever notice you â you sad, pathetic loser.
"is that what you really think?"
gojo wonders if a momentous occasion as the one now deserves one brawl thrown into it or not. it won't be anything much; just dumping a bowl of soup down suguru's shirt and/or landing a pretty solid kick to his stomach and/or-
"careful, senpai or you might've to go home, bloody and beaten," the most monotone voice ever possible crashes into his thoughts in the worst possible way. a snicker, far too familiar, joins in. "yeah, nanami's right. besides, we haven't even clicked a pic yet. you wouldn't want to wear a black eye in it, would you?"
clinking his glass with shoko's, the white-haired watches suguru gulp down a shot of tequila, then give a mighty firm shake of his head. "no, of-fucking-course not. today is our dearest kouhai's important day; i don't wanna get involved in any drama now; though..." trailing off, the black-haired boy shoots gojo an awfully obvious side-glance before a look shared with the others.
the boy lets his eyes wander away from them. an abominably sharp acrylic nail pokes him in the cheek. gojo exhales a sigh, so exhausted.
were it just a day, the boy's certain to the hell and back, that he would have whipped up a snarky insult to the stink-eye aimed his way. the boy would have slapped his drunk classmate's hand away, calling her sense of fashion the worst names possible.
gojo, however, decides to resort to neither today. he decides to settle for a sigh - the second in the last minute, longer and wearier than the one before - and rests his face into the hollow of his palms, screwing eyes shut.
an exasperated grumble - or two, maybe - permeates the air.
"gojo senpai," the words ring out in a tone far too soft and worried. he muses he doesn't need to look to see the sympathetic frown haibara must be wearing, nor the varying degrees of pity and concern etched into the others' features. a warm hand squeezes his shoulder slightly.
haibara continues, "geto senpai is not entirely wrong, y'know? yes, of course, implying you might kick up drama is sorta wrong, i admit so. but otherwise... you could've tried to, i don't know, somehow find out the reason behind her sudden distance from you?"
opening his eyes, gojo twists to face his kouhai, ready to interrupt him, but stops at the earnestness in his gaze. "turning into a recluse or moping around isn't gonna solve anything, senpai. it's been more than a month since then and from what little i've seen, i can say it's eating the both of you alive. you, way more than her. so, go, speak with her," he urges him with a smile, "the others are not very well at showing their emotions but trust me when i say, we all are worried for you both, senpai."
the white-haired boy drags his gaze away from the speaker. suguru gives him a smile, shoko pokes him in the cheek again, nanami offers a fleeting impression of something smiley before looking away with a grimace.
gojo's eyes flit back to the encouraging boy before.
"okay," the upperclassman relents with a sigh, which instantly grows into a frown the moment every piece clicks into place in his mind and the goggles-wearing boy swears his heart skips a beat, "but what did you say about seeing shortie and know-"
stopping in the middle of the question, the boy stiffens.
three glasses shatter on impact with the floor, freed from the waiter's grasp, soon followed by two maids screeching your name in the most terror-struck voice ever manageable. gojo's six eyes provide him with enough details as always; albeit it seems miles from enough now, the way it always is in your case, further deepening the sorcerer's need to physically see you once; to soak in the brilliance of your gaze and the sweetness of the curve of your lips once.
who knows if he'll ever see you again from as close as-Â okay, no, wait-
"did you just run all the way here-"
"i love you."
"-in your heels?"
everything falls silent the moment the last word leaves gojo's lips and a shuddered breath escapes him into the bittersweet fragrance of the citrus perfume he remembers you using. in a lilac dress with a messy hairstyle and diamond studs, the youngest and newest leader of your clan stands before him, cheeks stretched in a wide grin.
whirling his seat round completely, the boy gives you one long look, only to earn a hauntingly soft look in return.
you smile.
"i know you might see me as the most inconsistent, lying, crazy bitch at best or as the most opportunistic bitch ever, trying to seduce you, for lack of a better term, to satisfy her craving for power, at worst; but no matter how you see me, how others see me, how i see myself - i'm in love with you, that's one thing which won't change no matter what."
you pause.
and as he watches you catch your breath after that long as hell sentence para, the first realisation which crashes on gojo's otherwise numb brain is: you too haven't changed.
not. one. bit.
from the way you stick to your minimal makeup look; to the way you speak sans any break and curse yourself as you confess to something (you think you did) wrong; to the way your gaze remains fixed on him, acutely trained on even the mildest twitch of his facial muscles... one whole month has passed since that stormy evening yet you're still the same you.
a little sweet. a little sour. a whole lot perfect-
who loves him-
who loves him-
you. love. him. too.
for the first time in an apparent eternity, gojo feels his lips lift in a free smile. although the chuckle leaving him sounds laden with moisture and emotions.
"i'll die before calling you a seductress, shortie," the boy says, "you're way too dumb and naive for that." your eyes move to the girl drinking beside him for a second, before settling back on him, a light sheen in them. smile widening yet growing a tender quality, he goes on to say, "and i know you aren't a liar; but regarding the inconsistent claim... i think an explanation's long overdue, isn't it?"
you huff a mild chuckle. stuffing your hands into your dress pockets, your senpai watches you draw in a long breath before letting it out in a whoosh, a tiny smile nestling in the corner of your lips. you begin.
"you know, right, my eldest brother was the clan leader before me? y'know, after my father just decided, one fine day, he's growing old and so he wants to retire somewhere peaceful now, with my mom, leaving me in the care of takeshi nii-chan and his wife?"
four pairs of eyes switch to him in silent query. ignoring them, gojo nods. it isn't everyday you speak so openly of your family, especially this topic concerning them.
considering how painful and sore it is for you.
how big of an escapist your father is.
how big of an asshole your brother is.
how utterly difficult it is for you to navigate in this household daily.
your sigh interrupting his thoughts, he hears you continue, "well, all was going well until it was not; and i decided i'd already spent too much time being a spectator to my life and future keeping getting kicked around like a fucking soccer ball."
few gasps sound in the vicinity, undoubtedly at you cussing. nanami's smooth voice cuts in through their shocked surprise, and through the bubble, gojo was under the impression, he and you had slipped into.
judging from the tiny start you give, the white-haired boy surmises you too must have felt the same.
your classmate's solemn voice sounds in the hush, though traces of a hesitation can still be found in it when he asks, "they... didn't arrange a wedding for you in the month you were here... did they?"
"they did," you're quick to answer, voice growing a steely quality, "the higher-ups and my brother decided to get me engaged to-"
"to whom?"
gojo's lips quirk up at the way you roll your eyes at suguru's impatient question, then look at him, a tired smile creeping onto your features. but, hey! is that a tinge of shyness on your face that the boy can see?
you point your chin at him. "to 'toru, who else?"
the second (or maybe, the third) bout of silence would have followed this statement of yours too - if not for the cackling girl beside gojo. the latter makes no effort to conceal his irritation, shooting the most vicious glare ever; shoko simply raises her glass, as if in a toast, then tosses you a smirk.
"you love him, still you don't wanna get hitched with him? not very clever of you, yeah?"
"yeah," haibara chips in, albeit much less teasing and more a worried timbre than shoko, the shades-wearing boy deems. the other student continues, brows creasing together, "plus, i doubt gojo senpai saying no to the proposal. so, why didn't you go ahead with it?"
your head tilts to one side. your lips twitch in a knowing fashion.
"you just said the reasons yourself, yu-kun."
years later, if someone asks gojo when's the time he realised he's in love with you, too deep and too far gone to ever consider anyone but you by his side, as his other and undoubtedly better half, the sorcerer will grin the goofiest grin ever and sigh the dreamiest sigh ever, and say, "every day."
which is the truth, really-
yet, from those 'every day'-s, there exist few such days, whom the six-eyes user's brain subconsciously frames in a golden frame and places on a dust-free pedestal.
for instance, today.
a day your senpai dreaded to begin by leaving the comfort of his bed, knowing the person whose ascension to the metaphorical throne he has been invited to witness today, blood chilling and condensing into tears on his lashes as memories from long ago and not-so-long-ago hurtle into his brain.
only to morph, by evening, into the day the boy realises: love isn't just what made him switch his infinity off and pull you under him, a shield to protect you from the crumbling roof, forgetting everything except your safety and life; but love is also what made you push him and the emotions within yourself away.
forgetting everything - the boy knows from knowing you these many years - except your very evident aim of shielding him from the vicious schemes of those responsible for this damned jujutsu hierarchy.
no matter how easy and rewarding the other path would've been for you.
no matter how difficult and painful this current path must've been for you.
just 'cause you love him.
just 'cause you know, at the end of it all, he's going to be safe, away from the manipulating hands of the higher-ups - away from even the slimmest chance of experiencing a shred of the ordeals you suffered as a child, losing your free will and living as a mere puppet, subject to those old geezers' whims and fancies.
the two of you are not-too-near to the threshold of adulthood; still, through those unsure lenses of transition between immaturity and maturity, gojo feels sure this very moment that his eyes are viewing now - of watching his feelings being reciprocated not only in words (which, he knows, are true; your body language is as familiar to him as the back of his hand) but also in actions - so pure, so selfless, so utterly... loving-
the boy reckons his six eyes have never landed on a sight so ethereal and just so good, that it makes his heart want to burst right out of his chest.
drinking in the way you're regarding him, fingers fidgeting and teeth gnawing on your lower lip, gojo cracks a smile.
your restlessness abates a little.
"you became the clan leader just to make sure this story remains ours and only ours, didn't you?"
you take a moment before answering with a big nod.
"yeah," you say, "but that doesn't mean you need to be grateful to me or anything of the sort. you can give me any answer you want to give. you can also give me no answer, now or ever, if that's what you really want to do. just know that i love you, and that your answer can never really put a dent in it, no matter what it is."
"no matter what it is?" your senpai echoes your words back to you. a small nod is what you send in reply; yet it seems to be more than the quantity of oil required to set the cogs of gojo's brain whirring to life and mischief. eyes narrowing, he asks, "not even if my response is an 'i love you too, shortie', hm?"
the clock in the room ticks thrice.
two known voices mutter curses behind him.
five maids of yours scurry out the door, whispering excitedly.
you narrow your eyes back at him.
"i asked you to not feel pressured, didn't i? tell me what you want to say, 'toru," you say; his name in your mouth sounds sweeter than the sweetest mochi the boy's ever tasted, "and not those stuff you think i want to hear you say."
your statement draws an amused chortle from gojo. "did you really forget what i told you last that day, shortie? or did you not again not understand what i was telling you then?"
"what's there to not understand in that!?" your indignant reply arrives without missing a beat, "you said you've always seen me as way more than a childhood friend: true 'cause we're best friends. then- oh yeah," with a click of your fingers, you add, face steeped in contemplation, "you also said-Â oh."
"yep, oh," gojo nods his head in an exaggerated fashion, revelling in the way you're looking at him right now, eyes round as saucers and cheeks ruddy as the expensive wine being served now.
you still seem so beautiful to him.
it takes a pinch more than a while before you breathe out a breathless giggle. straightening in his seat, gojo feels his cheeks hurt a bit from the wide smile digging indents into them.
"you really lo-"
"ma'am, the guests for the evening party will be here very soon. you should get ready now," one of your maids interrupts you. the sorcerer feels his smile shrivel a little. you're barely back with him; yet you'll be stolen away from him-
"aw, is it so?" your entertained query cuts in through his thoughts. the boy looks up from his shoes his gaze had moved to before, to you, an awfully fake apologetic smile lighting up your face.
gods, why do you look so fucking kissable when you're like this?
"you know what, the people invited aren't really the kind i want to talk to and ruin my mood. besides, i've already met 'my' guests, so..." the boy watches you inch closer to him slowly as you trail off; your maid's eyes narrow before widening. you grin. "toodles, mrs. matsui!"
that and the salute you throw at everyone in the room are the last two memories clear in gojo's mind, before everything turns into a mush of everything yet nothing in the end.
well, barring a few exceptions, of course.
your contagious chortles, for instance, while you both dash down the hallways of your mansion; or your delighted gasp when he wraps his arms round you and warps to that patisserie in nikko; or your million-watt-bright beam to him, as you slap the latter's sneaky hands away from stealing a bite from your plate, whilst the latter declares this to be where you two will celebrate the future milestones; or the-
"ieiri senpai was right, y'know?" your tired voice cuts in through your senpai's rather-muddled recollections. the latter tears his gaze away from the inky-black night sky dotted by the twinkling lights of tokyo, to your drowsy form resting her head on his chest, his one arm tight around your shoulders, while the other rests behind his head on the cold hood of the car.
moving to brush the strands of hair away from your forehead, the boy presses a kiss to the tip of your nose, earning a sweet kiss to his chin in return, and hums, "not really the person i wanna chat about right now with my girlfriend..." you suddenly twist your body towards him, throwing an arm over his stomach and nuzzling into his neck; making a mental note to address you as that more often, he sighs. "but carry on, i guess. you won't be you if you can't gush about that damn shoko every third sentence or something."
planting your lips to his jaw for a mere second, gojo watches you pull away an inch from him, grinning. "senpai said you'll be the first one to confess but i'll be the one who makes things official and public and all that shit," you explain, then gasp, grin turning wider.
"oh my god," you mutter, "geto senpai and iori senpai are gonna lose so much money to her. them two never thought you could ever say 'i love you' to me, did you know that? oh my god... i kind of feel bad for those two."
the gleeful expression you're wearing tells your boyfriend otherwise - choosing to ignore it, he throws you a smirk. "well, i don't. those two people shouldn't have doubted me. i'm the one and only gojo satoru," he proclaims, puffing his chest out a bit, "of course, I'll be successful in my mission of getting you to notice my love for you."
"nah, i don't think so," you shake your head the very next instant. lips into the most adoring curve he's ever seen on you - something which steals his retort away from him and makes him want to pinch his arm hard, to see if he's dreaming or not - you hum.
"you could confess your love to me, not 'cause you're gojo satoru. but because you're my 'toru and i'm your shortie... isn't it so?"
gojo thinks back to the time utilised in carefully drafting and finalizing the steps via which he can catch your eye, only to watch them not go the way planned.
gojo looks back to you, only to find your eyes trained on him, glitters of love in them unbelievably similar to those loud crackers bursting in his chest right now.
the young sorcerer runs a reverent finger down the side of your face.
"yeah, it is because you're my shortie and i'm your 'toru, sweetness," he whispers, "and we'll always stay this way, yeah?"
you reply by engraving the shape of your smile into his.
AND MY MAGNUM OPUS IS OVER, BESTIES!!! đĽłđĽłđ
tysm once again for always showing me sm love and support, y'all đĽšđĽšđĽš i cherish each and every one of u so so SO MUCH - plesae keep supporting me and my works the same way in the future too, my loves đĽšđĽšâ¤ď¸
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#gojo x you#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x you#gojo satoru x reader#jjk x you#jjk x reader#gojo fluff#jjk fluff#kit posts đ
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âIâm not ever gonna stop.â
Eddie Munson x female reader
summary: reader and eddie are new parents. reader struggles to keep everything together for eddie.
warnings: dad eddie and mom reader, postpartum depression, new baby and all the things that go with it, language, stressed reader very emotional, breastfeeding.
âOh, God.â You moaned in exhaustion, back against the closed door to your babyâs nursery after finally getting her to sleep after hours of crying. You opened your eyes, the trailer an absolute wreck. You knew you should listen to your doctor. When the baby sleeps, you sleep, but you had so much to do. Laundry, dishes, dinner. It had been days since you showered, absolutely covered in spit up, formula and piss.
Baby Johanna was only five weeks old, and as amazing and life changing those weeks had been, theyâd also been the hardest and most challenged. You were physically and emotionally drained. Completely exhausted. She was the best thing to ever happen to you, without a doubt, but damn, did you miss sleeping a full night. Eddie of course, helped when he could, but he worked full time. Everyday 9 to 5.
Eddie knew you were having a hard time. He felt terrible he couldnât do more, spend more time at home, but he carried a big responsibility by supporting the finances. Youâd called Joyce almost everyday with questions. Why she wouldnât stop crying? Why she never seemed happy? She fussed all the live long day. You felt so behind on everything. Your house, your life, your husband. You missed showering and wearing deodorant.
Your eyes fixated on your messy home, brain so exhausted and cluttered you didnât know where to start. Wiping your sweaty face, you pushed yourself off the door to the living room, picking up trash off the floor and cold coffee cups. You cringed when you caught your reflection in the mirror hung above the table. Your hair was falling out of your bun atop of your head. You were pale as snow and had craters under your eyes, lips chapped and cry. Your t shirt was stained and torn at the arm, your black shorts on underneath. You looked horrendous, but house work was more important than a shower.
You were extremely depressed. Well, you didnât know if you were more exhausted or depressed. Either way, you didnât feel good. You felt yourself disassociating from your own body, having trouble concentrating and staying focused with your own mind. Half the time, you didnât feel real. It made you feel crazy, but you couldnât help it. Youâd read about postpartum, Eddie had too, but you legitimately were struggling. Your daughter made it worth it, however. Father hood looked good on Eddie, you hoped he thought the same for you. ďżź
Your baby looked just like him. She had dark curls already at her young age, a head full of hair. A little button nose, which Eddie says she got from you. Big brown eyes, from dad. A birthmark on her shoulder, from you. She was the most perfect thing youâd ever seen. It was hard to believe that you made her. It made you incredibly proud.
It had been just ten minutes. Youâd gotten a small portion of the living room picked up when she starting screaming again. You had angrily thrown down the trash in your hands to the floor, groaning into your hands as you followed the cry. Youâd held her in the rocking chair, trying your best to sooth her. Youâd tried feeding her, which hurt badly. Youâd never imagine your breasts would be so ginormous.
Another thirty minutes of her crying sent you into a wave of snotty tears until she finally fell asleep in your arms. Youâd carefully put her in her crib, tiptoeing and praying to god above she wouldnât wake up. You full heartedly believed she hated you, or at least was out to get you. She was never happy with you or what she did. Oh, but daddy? She loved him. He never did anything wrong in her eyes.
For the next two hours you tried to settle your baby while you attempted to clean. You never got much done, then she would start to cry again. She wouldnât touch your boob, her diaper was clean. All she did was cry. Youâd called Joyce and she assured you that nothing you were doing was wrong. Babies cried, they went through fits and phases. You just had to let her cry it out.
It was 5:30 when Eddie walked through the door, waving a bundle of red roses. âHowâs my best girl!â He cheered, throwing his jacket on the couch.
âShh, shh!â You panicked, running to cover his mouth. âI just got her back to sleep!â
He cringed under your hand. âSorry.â He chuckled quietly. âGot ya flowers.â
You smiled softly, taking them in your hands and admiring them. âThank you. Theyâre pretty. How was work?â You turned to lay them on the table, stepping over the baby mobile.
âGood. Boss says Iâve got a raise in the future if I pick up more hours.â He opened the fridge for a beer, leaning against the kitchen counter.
âMore hours?â You frowned, tucking a hair behind your ear. âDonât you think you work too much as is?â You tried speaking quietly, collecting all the dirty dishes to put in the sink.
âYeah, I know, baby, but with little Joey now we could really use the money.â You would have smiled at the endearment he used for your daughter, but the idea of him picking up for hours made your throat grow thick. Eddie was your rock. You yearned for five oâclock at the start of each day.
âYeah, okay.â You sighed, pushing a curl with your breath. You got out the broom from the closet to sweep the floor.
Eddie took a look around his home, watching how angsty and exhausted you were. He didnât want to seem like a dick, but he was hungry. âWhenâs dinner, babe?â
âOh, fuck.â You stopped your sweeping, head looking up to the ceiling as you closed your eyes. âDamn it, Eddie, Iâm sorry,â You threw down the broom, not caring whether or not it made noise. âIâve been so busy trying to get thatâŚIâd say our daughter but Iâm halfway convinced I have birth to some- some- spawn of satan, to sleep!â You stressed, running your hands through your hair.
âHey, hey, itâs okay,â Eddie chuckled, placing down his beer as he stepped toward you. âCome here,â He pulled you into his arms and you melted into them. âSorry you had a bad day, baby. Wanna order pizza?â
You mumbled a quiet yeah into his shirt, stifling a yawn. You wanted him to hold you all night, but you had so much to do. You pushed yourself away, grabbing the phone off the counter to hand it to him. âYou order pizza and Iâll finish sweeping.â
âHoney,â Eddie peered down at you. âNo sweeping. Take a break and sit down with me, yeah?â
You shook your head, sniffling. âNo- no, Iâve got too much to do before she wakes up again, I-â
âYou can do that tomorrow.â He picked the broom off the floor and put it in the closet. âIâll order pizza and you go put on your cute little pjâs, alright? Have dinner with me.â He flashed you a million dollar smile.
You frowned, however, looking over the dirty home before you have a singular nod.
â˘
Today had been a good day. Youâd been able to get a half decent nightâs sleep, and Johanna wasnât near as fussy as she had been yesterday. Youâd gotten some house work done, cleaned the living room and did the dishes. All you had left was to catch up on laundry and clean your bedroom. Youâd taken a shower in the morning before Eddie had left for work, even had breakfast with him.
Right now, you were nursing your baby girl in your arms, neck propped up on a pillow as you sat on the couch, eyes fixated on the game show on the tv. âOw.â You winced lightly, chuckling as you looked down. âYou donât go very easy on mommy, you know?â Your nipples were extremely tender these days, swollen like a bunch of watermelons. Eddie adored it. It made you waddle just like when you were pregnant.
Sheâd fallen asleep after nursing for another twenty minutes, allowing you to sit there peacefully after youâd pulled your tank top back over you. Your eyes dropped tiredly, your head just lightly pounding from exhaustion. You looked down at your daughter, her face snuggled against your boob. You took your finger and gently caressed her cheek. She looked so much like Eddie. Her purple onesie was snug, her little belly poking out and her dark curls were messy at the top from all the wiggling around she did. When she was quiet like this, you could think. It really was worth it, all the work and lack of sleep. She made it worth it. Her and Eddie.
Carefully, you laid down on the couch and adjusted her on your chest. She moved just a little bit, her tiny fist gathering your dirty tank top in her hand. You smiled, pulling a blanket over top of you. You werenât going to sleep. You were extremely paranoid about co-sleeping. Eddie assured you that you were being over dramatic, but youâd read horror stories about it.
You have her a kiss atop of her head and enjoyed the rest of your show.
â˘
âThereâs my girl.â Eddie said in a childlike voice, front door still open from his arrival. You smiled widely as little Jo squealed in her baby mobile on the floor. Eddie threw his stuff down and went to her, lifting her out of her seat and kissing her cheek. âBaby, baby, baby, howâs my baby?â He repeated, lifting her up into the air to blow raspberries on her bellow. âHowâs my little Joey Jo?â He tucked her into his side, face red from how hard he smiled, finally turning to you.
âHowâs my other girl?â You laughed as he came over to give you a peck on the lips.
âI donât remember the last time I was thrown into the air like that.â
âOh, yeah?â He raised a brow, pulling on Joâs onesie. âYouâre in for a fun night, then, little lady.â
You rolled your eyes, leaning into his chest to cuddle him and your baby. âHow was work?â
âGood.â He kissed the top of your head. âNext week Iâm up to another hour. Should be getting home about six oâclock then.â
You sighed, locking eyes with Jo. She didnât like it either.
âI know, sweetheart, but you know we need the money.â He said remorseful, leaning back to see your face a bit. âItâs just one more hour. Not too bad, right?â
You nodded, pushing yourself away to turn to the sink, turning on the hot water. âDinnerâs on the table. Joyce brought over a lasagna.â You blinked back tears as you waited for the sink to fill up so you could clean the numerous baby bottles.
Eddie looked from the table to you. âYou gonna eat with me?â
âGot too much to do.â
He sighed, knowing you were upset about the news, but what else was he supposed to do? Money was essential, and he would do anything to support the both of you.
He gave Jo another kiss before putting her back into the mobile, leaning up against the counter to get a look at your face. He frowned at the sight of your tears. âBaby,â
You sniffled, your hands red from the scolding water. âIâm fine.â You said dismissively. âJust eat your dinner.â
âHey,â He sat up straight. âDonât be like that. Talk to me.â He cupped your shoulder.
âI donât feel like talking.â You brushed his hand off. âIâve got too much fucking work to do, but you wouldnât know since youâre not ever fucking here, because youâre always fucking working.â You snapped, throwing a baby bottle at the floor, bubbles splattering across the counter.
Eddieâs eyes widened in shock at your outburst, mouth falling ajar. His pride wanted him to snap right back, but he knew you were right. You got the brunt of parenthood. He wasnât going through what you were. He heard about the bad days. He didnât experience them.
âIâm sorry.â Your voice broke, placing your soapy hands on the counter. âI didnât- I didnât mean that. Iâm just tired, Iâm sorry.â
âSweetheart,â He swallowed, trying to bring you close.
âJust-â You brushed him away again. âJust eat your dinner, please.â You looked to him with tearful, pleading eyes. âI got too much to do.â
He looked at you in disbelief, while you looked at Joanna. He gave a sad nod before leaving you be.
â˘
You were sobbing on the floor, baby girl in your arms, propped up by your knees. Sheâd been crying all day, had barely ever stopped. The house was now again an absolute wreck and youâd gotten nothing done. You had spit up on your neck, dried and irritated. Your breasts were throbbing, sore and tender. Sheâd about sucked them dry and you cried the entire time. Youâd had enough and put her in her crib, hoping sheâd cry it out like Joyce said. She had to hate you, why else could you not get her to stop crying. Her feeding schedule was normal, she never had trouble, and while nursing hurt badly, youâd had luck with not getting any clogged ducts.
âFuck,â You cried after shutting the door. Your chest was bubbled with emotions, teary eyes scanning the mess of your small home. It was hard to move around in there, especially with a baby, but you didnât want to bother Eddie with requesting a more expensive home. He did enough as is. Youâd felt guilty for snapping at him like you did, but you were at your absolute wits end. You were on the floor folding laundry an hour later when Eddie came home.
âHey, sweetheart,â Eddie smiled, looking around for his daughter. âJoey asleep?â
âFinally.â You glanced up at him briefly. âSheâs been crying all day. I havenât had time to do anything at all.â
âWell,â He sat down beside you, grabbing the clothes from your hand. âI want to take you out tonight. I called Robin and Steve and figured we could all go out to dinner. Itâll be good for you to see them.â
You laughed shortly before continuing your work. âSounds nice, Eddie, but Iâm too busy.â
âNonsense.â He dismissed, taking the clothes yet again and pulling the both of you off the floor as you protested. âGo take a shower, baby. Joyce is going to babysit. Sheâs on her way over now.â
He was serious. Your face fell. âEddie.â You swallowed, sighing heavily. âPlease, I- honey, thank you, thatâs sweet, but I canât.â
âWhy not?â He raised his hand. âYouâve not been out in weeks. Youâre too cooped up in here, doll. You need to get out of the house. Steve and Robin are on their way too.â
âWhat?â You widened your eyes. âEddie! No, this place is a disaster!â You panicked, your hair falling out of your messy, lazy braid. âGod damnit, Eddie!â
âOh, come on, donât start getting mad again.â He sighed, rubbing his face tiredly. âY/n, Iâm trying to help here, okay? No offense, but youâre not making it very easy on me.â
âOh, my god.â You squeezed your eyes shut, running your hands through your hair. âIâm so damn sorry that youâre having a hard time, Eddie!â
âYou donât have to be so rude all the time, you know?â He threw down his work jacket, taking a step with his heavy boots. âI bust my ass all day and have to worry about the money because I donât want you worrying about that shit! Youâve got enough on your plate, I know you do, but so do I! Now, will you just let me please take you out?â
âEddie,â You sobbed, your internal damn breaking. âEddie, I canât. The house is such a mess and I have so much to do.â Your face crumpled into tears of hysterics, your hands moving from your sides to your belly. âIâm sorry- Iâm trying s-so hard to keep everything together for you but I canât- god, she hates m-me!â You sniffled, node snotty and red.
âY/n,â He sighed, face relaxing into a frown.
You shook your head, crossing your arms. âI love her so much but- but itâs just..how am I supposed to do this everyday! Iâm so exhausted and I smell and my boobs hurt so bad!â You sobbed, shoulders shaking from the weight of your heartache. âIâm sorry, I donât mean to be a bitch, Iâm so sorry-â
âHey, hey, hey, shh,â He gathered you close, arms entangling around you tightly, hoping to ease your pain. âItâs alright, itâs alright, baby, calm down, shh,â He rocked you, large palm smoothing your hair. âItâs okay, sweetheart.â
âI donât feel pretty anymore.â You wept into his shoulder.
âYouâre beautiful.â He squeezed you. âYouâre always beautiful to me. Iâm so sorry youâve been struggling so much. I shouldâve been paying more attention. I didnât realize things had gotten so bad.â He kissed your shoulder, then your cheek.
âI just want you to be proud of me.â You sniffled. âI feel like such a mess and this house, this house that you pay for, I canât ever keep fucking clean.â
âHoney, I am proud of you.â He took your face in his hands. âIâm so proud of you. The things your body can do is incredible. The things you do every day is incredible. Watching you be a mother is the most amazing thing I know Iâm ever going to witness. Youâre not giving yourself enough credit.â
âCredit for what?â You groaned, wiping your nose with your sleeve. âFor complaining? For being ungrateful?â
âYouâre not ungrateful.â He softened his brown eyes. âYouâre having a hard time. It doesnât make you ungrateful.â
âIâm just sorry.â You whimpered. âDo you still love me?â
He couldnât help but smile at your innocence. âIâm not ever gonna stop.â
He wound up calling Steve shortly after and told him it would be another time, and that he needed to take care of his girls. He pampered you all night and made sure you didnât lift a finger cleaning the house. He fed the baby with her bottle while you took a shower, tidying things up along the way. Your shower was almost forty five minutes. Heâd ordered chinese food and had it ready when you got out. Joanna sat in her playpen while you both ate.
It really wasnât much to Eddie, but these actions to you meant more than he could ever say. You laid on his chest on the couch, watching wheel of fortune until you both drifted off to sleep.
#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#stranger things#stranger things season four#joseph quinn#eddie munson imagines#eddie munson fluff#eddie munson one shot#eddie munson headcanons#eddie munson angst#eddie munson oneshot#eddie x new mom#eddie munson x y/n
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2022-12-05 âReverse Little Mermaid #Nogizaka Star Tanjou Liveâ Ikeda Teresa blog [ENG]
Iâm not the greatest at dancing or singing, and that was the person that stood in front of everyone as an idol⌠I realized this during my first live, I didnât think anything of it while I was rejoicing and enjoying my time with the group but I recognized it when I returned home.
How could I have done better, Iâm lacking something is what I thought as I practiced more. Despite this I had a tendency to feel depressed about the difference in my abilities compared to the other 5th generation members. However, the other 5th generation members would listen and answer when I talked to them about things, no matter how trivial they were and would tell me to just keep doing my best.
Despite the fact that I was thankful to them, I had feelings of envy and jealousy, and I felt absolutely disgusted at myself and I hated that I felt that way (But I love them! I love themâŚ)
The story of the Little Mermaid is that she feel in love with someone and in order to me them they threw away the voice that they were so proud of didnât they. That means I should throw away everything that I hold dear that isnât part of me as an idol⌠If I throw them away God will present me with âme as an idolâ is a day dream that Iâve be obsessed with recently. (â´^ď˝â)
 But I want to live as a the reverse Little Mermaid, I want the prince to come see me⌠and the prince is all of the fans that support me, and I hope that weâll be together for a long time so Iâm going to do my best to be your tattered reverse Little Mermaid.
â17 funkanâ
The MV for new 5th generation Member song for the 31st single â17 funkanâ has been released on the Nogizaka 46 Official YouTube Channel â¨
Thank you to everyone that have given me their opinions.
Hearing all the wonderful things that people have been saying about it makes me really happy.
But, the fact that Iâm here able to make everyone happy is because everyone has been supporting and cheering me on.
Every since âZetsubou no ichi byou maeâ Iâm grateful that you continued to watch me and never gave up on me.
Itâs thanks to all of you that Iâm able to do my very best.
The combination of Me and Kuu-chan đąđ
We both have snow piled on our heads and we turned whiteâŚlol
 Itâs our first combination!!! Recently Iâve been working a lot with Kuu-chan, Iâm so glad that weâve been together so much recently ehe
 I even appeared with Kuu-chan when we went on âZipâ on November 30th. The deadline for telling everyone was really tight so I wasnât able to let anyone know on my previous blog, thank so much to everyone that watched it (_ _)
 Ever since I was a student Iâve always watched ZIP in the morning, so I canât believe that Iâm the one there on that screen now, Iâm so glad. My first appearance on a morning news program was a just a few seconds since it was a very tight block but the fact that I was to touch and feel that atmosphere makes me really happy and thankful
 ăăă
We held an online mini live for the 30th singleđ¤đť
We performed the 5th generation song that was recorded for the CD âBanHagaâ! When I listen to this song the memories of summer rush into my head, the outdoor live in the middle of summer at Jingu will always be a treasured memory along side the scenery that we saw while performing this song. đâď¸
It was also a debut of the coupling songs that were recorded âPassion fruits no tabekataâ âYume or Moru Kinnikuâ! To be able to see it live made me think âBeing a member of Nogizaka is the bestâ ehehe
It was super cool, the mature and sexiness felt like I was able to find another side of Nogizaka, if you like please have a listen. (Itâs amazingly addictive)
We unveiled our new outfitđź
The stripped shirt one piece dress is super adorbs, I love it ă(ăâă)
IâŚwhat kind of outfit is this? Frilly?
(âThis is the name that Aruno, who is right beside me doing her make up, said. Iâm with Aruno đ¤)
 ăăă
đ¤Tiktok Live
The 5th generation members did a tiktokLIVE
Did you watch the special MV for â17 funkanâ?
Not only the regular version but being able to make this version as well made me very happy, thank you so much đłđ¤Having everyone see us chit-chatting during the lessons is really embarrassing lmao
I was nervous because this was my first time doing a LIVE broadcast with everyone⌠The later half, the half where I wasnât participating, everyone was talking a lot about me and that made me really happy! Making the MV was also a lot of fun, doing this reminded me of those times.
Iâm going to continue to work on being able to be more myself and talk more, I hope I get another chance to do a live stream again in the future( *ÂŻ ³¯*)
ăăă
đ¤Online meet and greet and online sign event
Yesterday was the final meet and greet for the 30th single, thank you to everyone that attended. Although the period for the 30th single seemed long it went by in the blink of an eye.
 This was a big turning point, there were so many people that expressed their gratitude up till now and gave me their feelings. My chest is all warm and fuzzy inside when I think about how I was able to work throughout this single with all of the support and protection I received.
When we first met, the reason you started liking me, when our eyes met and the Live concerts, the people who oshi me, I feel like we had so many moments together this single.
I want to know all of it, I want to share it with all of you, and more than just receiving those feelings they were told me directly. I want to repay those feelings in the words I write on my blog and through the performances that I do. There are so many ways I can give and return those feelings and so thatâs why Iâm glad to be able to work as an idol.
Thank you for everything over the course of the 30th single, so for the 31st single lets climb the Nogizaka slope together.
The things that I werenât able to write about on this blog will be put into the subsequent blogs.
ăăă
đ¤Notices
TVđş
âKotoge Eiji no Nante Bi da!â
Every Tuesday at midnight!
The next episode on the 6th will have urban design as the topic đ
Everyone do you have a favorite town or spot?
Iâm from Tokyo (The only 5th generation members!) but I havenât really done any research on places to sightsee here⌠If you have any recommendations please give me some đł
 âNogizaka Under Constructionâ
Every Sunday at Midnight!
It will be an episode on the member graduating this single Saito Asuka. If you like please check it out (âď¸Â´â˝ď¸`âď¸)
âKanarin no Top me torero Kana?â
Every two Saturdays at midnight!
Ikeda will be appearing on the 28th of January!
This will be my first time appearing along side the OG first generation member Nakada Kanađđ¤
Sheâs honestly so beautiful. Is this what a top class member of Nogizaka looks likeâŚ! As once again I feel like the figure Iâm going for has changed again
I havenât really done a lot of research into Mahjong but Heisei Nobushi Kobushiâs Tokui-san and Sanda-san were very kind and they explained everything step by step while mixing in their talk and I was able to have a lot of fun live (âď¸Â´â˝ď¸`âď¸)
Honestly, this was the reason that I have started to study Mahjong. My grandmother love Mahjong and so next time I return home Iâm going to challenge herâ¤ď¸âđĽ
The rules to this game are deep and difficult to understand, the lake seems deep ..
 âNew Nogizaka Star Tanjou!â
Every Monday at 25:29-25:59!
 There will be a new episode tonight.
The guest will be the 3rd generation member Nakamura Reno!
Nakamura-san and I performed Îź's âSnow Halationâ â
Ozwaldâs Hatanaka-san made a song for us ( ´Ë`)đđ¤Â
 âMada wakai kimi heâ since this program the unit CafĂŠ au lait was born which is made of Io-chan, Iroha. Their voices are so beautiful and they bring you into their world with the gentle lyrics that make your heart ringâŚ
Iâm so glad they got so a wonderful song!
New Nogizaka Star Tanjou! Live was held!
Tomorrow December 6th at Yokohama Pia Arena MM
December 18th at Kobe World Kinnen Hall (Matinee and night)
Iâm going to keep doing my best so please continue to look after me (_ _)
 ăăă
đ¤Q&A
 đ
Do you prefer sunrise or sunset?
(Blog name: Marshmallowsuke)
đ¤
Hmmmm⌠I donât really seem them often but I guess sunrise. But where I lived before I was on top a hill and on rainy days when the rain cleared up I remember that the sunset was gorgeousđđ¤
đ
When youâre seeing this comment how much have you finished writing?
(Blog name: Jyoushinko)
đ¤
Iâm only on my 41st word character. The road from here will be long and treacherous, Iâm going to do my best! ŮŠ(ËďžË*)Ů
đ
Have you ever been to Kumamoto?
(blog name: Cassiopeia)
đ¤
Iâve never been but I want go one day⌠đ§¸
On the previous national tour the Fukuoka performance was actually my first time being in Kyuushuu. Next time I go I want to be more relaxed and be able to go around and try various things. Â
đTeresa, what do your friend and/or family call you?
 (blog name: Miriamu)
 đ¤ Tere
 đQuestion (request) Have you ever taken any picture of the other 5th generation members while theyâre sleepingâŚ? (sleepy)
 (blog name: Kuchinashi to Momo)
 đ¤I have, of Ioki Mao đđ
Itâs not that I canât show it but that I wonât show it, why you may ask, itâs because she has one of me..
Since saying that Satsuki has also taken a picture đ
đWhat animal would you like to have as a pet !
(Blog name: Hamburg ni tsuiteru ninjin no amaiyatsu)
 đ¤Alaskan Malamute!
I also like Siberian Husky, I wish I could have a big and fluffy dog that I can fall asleep withđ
I really look up to veterinarians đŤśđť
đPotatoes with Tomato flavor, the bell rang on the microwave with a mustard flavored broccoliăout of the two which ones are the more delicious do you think⌠I want to know so badly that I can only sleep at night. I mean I also canât sleep at night lololololol
(blog name: Tsuyoi Ishi no Ishi)
đ¤???
I like mustard đ
đHave you ever mistakenly used body soap and shampoo?
(blog name: white)
đ¤
A long time ago I was curious and I tried it. It was really foamy and I got really excited but when I got out of the bath my hair was really stiff and so I wonât do it again⌠(  ߚęłâßš )
đWhat is something that you want to do at home this year?
 (Blog name: Akashiyaki)
đ¤I want a humidifier
Ikeda Teresa is drying outâŚ
đ
Question
1, What kind of hot pot do you like
2, what do you like to add to finish the hot pot?
3, what ingredients do you like that change the flavor of the dish? (yuzukosho? Shichimi) When the season is like this you want to eat hot pot donât you?
(blog name: Onii-chan)
đ¤
Personally, I like having leftover nabe for breakfast the next day it warms you up⌠đ
1, I like Motsu nabe! I wonder what sauce motsunabe has?
2, probably zousui or rice, I like that toođž
3, For a flavor change I do like yuzukosho!!!
đ
What do you wear to bed? Fluffy Pajamas? I love you smile Teresa-chan
(blog name: Mirin)
đ¤
I sleep in sweats with a boa lining and a light parka đŞđ´đ¤
I donât like brushed fabric but I like boa lined fabric.
đ
A question for Teresa-chan!!!
1, Whatâs your favorite season??
2, Whatâs your favorite Chinese food! (I had Chinese food this evening for dinner so Iâm interested)
Iâm looking forward to spotting you at a live concert
(Blog name: Chiruno no perfect sansu)
đ¤Iâm super duper looking forward to spotting all of you in the crowd
1, Fall
This fall went by in the blink of an eye⌠I also like those kind of fleeting moments
2, For some reason I really want to eat Peking duck right now đ
Peking DuckâŚ.duckiesâŚAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHđđđ
đ
When you only have one ticket to the meet and greet, what should one talk about?
(Blog name: Catherine Pick)
đ¤
At the time just relax, ă[___]Îľ`,)zzzâŚ
you canât oversleep! You need to come see me
đ
Teresa-chan when you put in your own name how do you make it come up?
I type in ç (ei) ç´(sa) and it comes up
Good night đ
(Blog name: Amanatsu)
đ¤Itâs a pain to keep doing it that way so I recommend adding it to the dictionary! By the way, if you type in Ikeda it wonât finish it, itâs super annoyingđ
 đ
Teresa do you like pepper steak? đ˛
(blog name: Taroimo đ )
đ¤
I dooooo
đI like gummy candies, Teresa-chan are there any gummy candies that you like?
(Blog name: Kurune pan)
đ¤I like ones covered with crunchy sugar! Ikeda doth have a sweet tooth đ
đ
I scored a point in futsal â˝ď¸, am I cool? Iâm cool right? If you cheer me on I think Iâll be able to score a point next week too. Iâm looking forward to you blog tomorrow đŞđ´đ¤
(blog name: Mascot da!)
đ¤
Youâre coooool!!!
Do you say or do anything when you score a goal in soccer? Please let me know⌠đĽšđŤśđť
đ
Question
1, Was there any stories that stood out from this meet and greet?
2, Please tell me a popular story among the 5th generation members!
3, Is there any doctor that you know that can cure my Tereru disease? Looks around restlessly⌠Iâm looking forward to the newest update of #Tereblog â¨
(Blog name: TaruTaru sauce)
đ¤
My blog has been updated!!! Have you seen it yet? đď¸đď¸
1, There were a lot of birthdays in December! It appears that people with the Tereru disease have a tendency to be born near the end of the yearâŚ? That canât be the case
2, Satsuki-cahn and Io-chan found out that I send voice messages to both of them, they have Ikeda Jealousy mumumu (âシ��-シĚâ)
3, Right here!!!! But if itâs me Iâll make it worse more than helping ^^
đIketya, is there any skill that you want to acquire? đť
(Blog name: Taskete Ikeda-san)
đ¤
Iketya wants to start learning an instrument. I miss going to this instrument shop that I often went to when I was younger
đ
Ikeda, what is a food containing tomatoes that you want to eat right now!?!?!? đ
(blog name: Chuumon ha Teresa Desuka?_
đ¤Bouillabaissem but this isnât a food with tomatoes, itâs seafoodâŚ? Aya recommended it to me ăź=ÍÍÍÍ( â˘ĚĐ´â˘Ě)
đ
Question
1, Whatâs a manga that you recommendďź
2, If you were given a million yen what would you do??
3, Since you donât know your blood type lets go and find out together! When do you want to go? Lol
Letâs climb this slope together!!!
(Blog name: kosama)
đ¤Letâs climb together yayayay ( *Ë0Ë*)Űś
1, Iâve been reading a lot of manga of food reports from other countries đ
I want to eat black bread from foreign countries, I want a solid and bulky bread more than the light fluffy stuff 𼨠(âThis looks like a heart, itâs really adorable)
2, I would buy all the volumes of my favorite manga, I would also buy a really good bookshelf that can fit all of them!
3, It seems the data is in my blood donation, Iâm somewhat anemic so I need to make sure I get a lot of iron ( âş_âš )
đ
Hello Teresa-pan! Question! When I played basketball I was a center! What position were you?
(Blog name: Cardigan)
đ¤I was a forward âšđťââď¸=ÍÍÍÍ
đDo you have a favorite philosopherďź
(blog name: Seneka to kotaete hoshiino ka?)
 đ¤
Thales made water the source of all things, when I remember it like  âwater isâŚ.Teresu!â (Iâm an ethical person)
đ
Recently my outer jacket has become damaged, this year have you bought a new outer jacket? Are there any outer jackets youâre interested in? I want to buy a big black one đĽ°
(Blog name: Onyu no zubon)
đ¤
I bought a black coat with a cape! I was troubled with what to do because I donât want to waste it by damaging it so I donât really use itâŚbut at the same time itâs a waste not to use itâŚwhat a dilemma (1st world problems)
đPlease tell me an embarrassing episode Teresa-chan
(Blog name: Kakkun)
đ¤Most of my meet and greet are typically embarrassing, Itâs because everyone is so kind and cool and adorable and yet youâre saying that you like meeeee Iâm so glad
 đDo you think itâs okay for a woman to be a fan of Nogizaka?
(Blog name: Mikoshiba)
đ¤From the start I was a Nogizaka Fan!!!! Weâre the same đ
đ
The 25th of December will be my first meet and greet and Iâm going to see Teresa-chan!!! How should I talk to you? Iâm finally able to meet you so can you say some words to someone almost and the end fo their life, đ Iâm going to do my best đ
(Blog name: Ishiri-nu)
đ¤
Iâm going to do my best to be able to give you a present as Tere-santa đ
đťâ¤ď¸âđĽ
đ
I understand not being able to get blood work! Do you get squeamish at checking your pulse?
2, Do you have any Christmas plans?? đ (By the way, Iâm doing a solo party at my house. But I wonât be alone, Tere-pan will forever be in my heart âĄ)
3, IF the other 5th generation members were to do a gift exchange would you participate? đ
(Blog name: Murakami)
1, When I look at my wrist I know there is a pulse there and itâs super disgusting but you look anyways donât you ( - Â - `)
2, Iâll be waiting for all of you to visit me đĽšđ
3, This year we all have planned to get together and have a Christmas party and do a gift exchange!!! I canât help but be excited ehe
đ
Is it okay for me to keep oshiing someone after I balloted for a meet and greet ticket but wasnât brave enough to speak to themâŚ..?
(blog name: đŚđťđŚ)
đ¤
No! You need to come see me đ , butâŚeven if you canât come Iâd be happy if you were to continue to oshi meâŚ. ButâŚ. I do want you to come and see me đđđ
đ
Teresa-chan are the kind of person who when their pencil gets really small you keep it that way? Iâm the person whoâs like âI really worked hard on all of these drawingâ and it make me happy to really short pencilsăbut my mother is ruthless and throws them away ( ďźâďź)
(Blog name: Buta no I wa Mino)
đ¤
When a pencil gets too small for the pencil case I also ruthlessly say goodbye to them (;_;)/~~~
Rather than an SDG itâs more about performanceâŚIf youâre worried about that then it might be better to buy 1 pencil for a 150 yen and use that
đ
Whatâs your favorite Onigiri flavor? While I was eating my onigiri I was thinking âWhat kind of onigiri does Teresa-chan likeâ and after thinking about it I feel like my level of happiness went upâŚlol This question hasnât been used yet and so I hope that it will be used soon!!!
(Blog name: Ripa samaa)
đ¤
This question, I like egg white and beef bowls from Sukiya! And so I suspect thereâs some similarities thereâŚlol
Without thinking I would say I like sujiko onigiri!!!!
Conmusclations on your question being used á(  ËęłâË Â )á
đQuestion eheh
1, If I comment too much Iâm worried that Teresa-chan will hate me..
2, I studied really hard for my test, can you please praise me! Lololol
3, My friends are going to Shinjuku what is there to do and eat there?
4, Everyone says âTere-panâ but I continue to say âTeresa-panâ is that okay?
5, Do get your hair straightened?
6, What color was your backpack in elementary school?
(blog name: Bacon lettuce cheese sandwich)
 đ¤
Iâll answer eheh
1, Thatâs not the case!!! Rather the more you comment the stronger Ikedaâs love will become stronger
2, To comment when youâre busy studying for tests and having you think about me, even just a little, make me really happy (âď¸Â´â˝ď¸`âď¸)
In the hopes that it will bring your scores up even just a little bit here is in an injection of Teresa-power đ Â ĚĚ-
3, I seriously want to go to Zara in Shinjuku right nowâŚ. (This has nothing to do with the question)
4, Occasionally they call me Teresa
5, Noo, O go to the beauty salonďźÂ´çĽď˝ďź
6, Light blue đđŞ
Surprisingly there werenât many in my school, everyone what color was yours?
đ
Question, Tere-san if you could master one sport what would choose?
(Blog name: Ein yori nagai ishuun)
đ¤
Right now it would probably be bike ridingâŚ! (Iâm addicted to Yowamushi pedal)
If I would be able to do another sport, or if you would have to have good athletic ability, it was written that for bikes that doesnât matter, there arenât a lot of people, like the main character Sakamichi-kun, who can meet their destined competition, Iâm jealousBut I guess for me my fated job is to be an idolâŚor so I hope!
đ
âWell, here isâŚ.(Tere-pan please!)â
(blog name: kirarikirarara)
đ¤A highlight đŚ
Highlight is a newer term isnât it, somehow it means the climax or something like that
Although there is the hustle and bustle of the live concert I didnât forget to write this blog..
The smell of smoke, the dimly lit backstage. You can feel it deep within the venue that this live doesnât have any of the senior members in it, thatâs really discouraging but I can still feel their grandeur.
Thank you for coming to the New Nogizaka Star Tanjou Live!
Today we broke a lot of barriers, and because I knew of my incompetence rehearsal were traumatic and I couldnât help but feel scared on stage, did you know that. Itâs very lonely being on the stage without people sitting in front of you in the audience. But when I remember standing on the stage in front of everyone I remembered yesterdayâs meet and greet, and the comments on this blog, and the other various ways you told me that you are supporting me đł
The venue was hot with everyoneâs passion. At the same time as my body temperature I felt like their was electricity coursing through my veins!
It is thanks to everyone that I was able to get through this live today with a smile on my face (_ _)
The 11 members of the 5th generation will work together and do our best in the remaining three live concerts.
To the manager supporting us, to the program staff who gave us a chance, and of course to all of the fans that are supporting us, I would like to thank all of you. Through my performance I hope you will receive my feelings of gratitude.
I love you all!!!
 22.12.05 #Tere-pan blog #21 (years old, soon to beâŚ)
https://www.nogizaka46.com/s/n46/diary/detail/100937?ima=3632&cd=MEMBER
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I heard requests were open, and you're currently into crk, so I decided to request! Could you do headcannons for Dark Choco with an s/o who loves fashion or designing clothes? (sorta like mont blanc cookie!) They usually like making outfits for themselves and Dark Choco! Feel free to ignore the request if you can't do it, lots of love đ đ đ đ
Such a Fashionista! (Dark Choco Cookie x GN Cookie!Reader Hcs)
CW: none, just fluff!!
A/N: I'm gonna take a break from creating some yandere fics cause it can be overwhelming sometimes đ
âżď¸ľâżď¸ľĘËĚŁĚŁĚŁÍÉăťâăť ĘËĚŁĚŁĚŁÍÉâżď¸ľâżď¸ľ
Not gonna lie, you being Dark Choco's significant other has its perks. Not only he gained someone who truely loves him despite being affiliated with Dark Enchantress Cookie but had a talent for making clothes? Yup, you are definitely a keeper!
Matching clothing is a must for the both of you, if your boyfriend is comfortable with it of course. On monthsaries, anniversaries or even birthdays, you didn't failed to show up bringing a huge sweater with a huge heart on it.
This tough cookie collects all of the matching clothing he received from you, wether it was a shirt, a sweater or a scarf, he would keep it. He won't hesitate to be angry if someone took those memorabilia away from his closet, especially Poison Mushroom Cookie.
Speaking of anniversaries, he would be insecure if he only brought a giant bouquet of flowers while you just bought him a whole wardrobe as a way to show how much you loved him. Dark Choco might lie that his gift isn't much but you just reassured him that the bouquet and himself are far more enough for you.
If you saw that his cape was ripped due to the many usage, you just straight up told him that you'll make a new one for him. At first, he just straight up decline your offer but you insisted, telling him that "My boyfriend's not gonna look intimidating and mysterious if the cape looks worn off."
There were some days that you haven't slept due to the increasing number of orders and the due date for your portfolio is coming up. This made Dark Choco very worried for you.
Not only he misses your warmth and cuddles every night but also on how sleep deprived you were. So, he just picks you up and drags you off to bed, even though you protested and insisting that you'll go to bed once you were done with your work.
Lies, you just drank coffee even when morning rolls around.
Dark Choco loves it when you teach him the basics on sewing fabric. Being raised in a royal and harsh lifestyle means that he hasn't learned anything aside from protecting others and himself during his youth, trained to become a strong warrior ever since he was a small cookie. Through your hobby, this is a great way for him to explore and had a hobby of his own.
He messes some stitches here and there but nonetheless, improved the more you taught him some of your techniques.
You became so proud of him after he created his first ever scarf made out from the spare fabric you used days ago. As a reward, you kissed him so many times until you saw a small smile forming on his face.
Your words of encouragement and support motivated him on making you mittens for you to protect your hands when snow arrived at the kingdom you lived in. He gives you this gift during Christmas and you absolutely loved it. You loved it so much that you didn't want to wear it out of fear that it night ruin the item, which your boyfriend insisted for you to try it on.
Remember the time when the both of you went on your first date but didn't want to be spotted by his allies? Yup, your boyfriend puts on a clothing that was specially created by you and felt light from all parts of his body. He was used to the weight of heaviness from his armour but in regular clothing? This is a new concept for the fallen prince.
Overall, Dark Choco should definitely keep you (not in a possessive way). He'll love and protect you as long as the two of you are together. Speaking of requests, Reader Cookie; Do you know how to make wedding attires? Cause it might come in handy if Dark Choco Cookie proposes to you one day <3
âżď¸ľâżď¸ľĘËĚŁĚŁĚŁÍÉăťâăť ĘËĚŁĚŁĚŁÍÉâżď¸ľâżď¸ľ
Do not republish, edit, or repost to other websites.
Reblogs and likes are appreciated! đ
#cookie run x reader#crk x reader#crk dark choco cookie#cookie run dark choco cookie#dark choco cookie x reader#cookie run imagines#cookie run kingdom#cookie run headcanons
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Tinder but make it your girlfriend
I'm so sorry I haven't posted anything in agesss but I've been very much preoccupied with university and writer's block but this came to me after reading @sour--disposition 's fic on a similar idea!
In this, the reader is a mcyt/streamer and Tommyinnit's sister and dating Ethan.
Y/H/T (your hometown)
Y/A (your age)
Y/H (your height)
You were sat in the green room, idly scrolling through twitter responding to replies from fans and your friends, waiting for one of the crew to let you know it was your turn. Everyone else had already had their turn, returning to recount the lines used by the boys through laughter.
Originally you werenât meant to be in the video but one of the girls had pulled out last minute so the boys had asked you to fill in the spot. As Ethanâs girlfriend youâd agreed to take part because you thought it would be funny to be involved instead of just being behind the camera.
Emma came back into the room, drawing you out of your thoughts, âgood luck Y/N, I think youâll need it.â
You smiled at her before getting up to follow the crew member into the shoot room. As soon as you walked in, the boys cheered. You stepped onto the footprints and looked at the camera to introduce yourself.
âHi. Iâm Y/N, from Y/H/T and Iâm Y/A,â you looked at the line of your friends in front of you, âdo your worst boys.â
Simon stepped up to the cut out first, trying to hide his smile, causing you to smirk back at him.
âHi. Iâm Simon, Iâm 28 and Iâm taller than Ethan,â he deadpanned, looking straight at you.
Alongside the other boys, you burst out laughing at Simonâs line, as Ethan made noises of insult from further back.
You stopped laughing enough to respond, âI mean the thing is, youâre right. So Iâm gonna go for yes.â
The laughter resumed as Simon went to the right, flipping off your boyfriend as he went when JJ went up next. You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for what your friend was going to say.
He looked at you, âIâm JJ, Iâm 27 and um, Iâm not a weatherman but you can expect a few more inches tonight.â
âOh God I feel sorry for your girlfriend, âyou replied with a small laugh, âI think you might be exaggerating with a few inches there JJ.â
JJ put his hand to his chest, staggering back into Stephen at your response.
âItâs a hard no for me JJ. Not sorry,â you decided, dramatically swiping your hand to the left.
He moved over to the left, with an overdramatic pout, âI will never recover from this Y/N.â
âIâm sure your ego is big enough to survive this,â you smiled at him sarcastically, âwhoâs next?â
Stephen stepped up to the footprints, âIâm Stephen, Iâm 25 and- you know what? Nah.â
You looked at him in shock as he went over to JJ whilst the others descended into laughter, Simon falling over and a couple of the others leaning on each other for support.
You pointed an accusing finger at him, âyou know what? I expected that from Freezy but not you Stephen. Iâm disappointed.â
âWhat did I do for this slander?â Cal protested.
âWe havenât got the time to explain that,â Lux laughed.
Tobi was next up, âHi Y/N.â
âAfternoon.â
âIâm Tobi, Iâm 27 and Iâm 6 foot tall.â
You looked at him with amusement, âEthan how tall am I?â
âY/H,â he replied with a matching look.
âI thought so. If youâre 6 foot Tobi then I must fucking snow white,â you answered, pointing him towards the no side, âthatâs just a bold faced lie.â
After Tobi came Callux who you knew was gonna be using a pick up line, âgive us your worst then Lux.â
âThe standards are high Y/N?â Asked Simon, currently the only when who youâd said yes to.
âWeâve established the bar is in hell, Iâm dating Ethan,â you deadpanned, smirking at the laughter that followed.
Cal began after youâd all recovered, âIâm Calum, Iâm 29. I have 206 bones in my body. Want to give me another one?â
You nodded, âyeah sure. Come here and Iâll break your leg in 2.â
Lux looked at you in complete shock whilst you just stared back at him, âoff to the left you go Luxxy.â
Following him was Vik, âIâm Vik, Iâm 25 and I play minecraft.â
âI mean I think Tommy would disown me if I said no but because youâre also an mcyt I feel Iâm legally required to swipe right,â you explained, gesturing to the right.
Finally it was the turn of Ethan. He stepped up to the cut out and looked at you. You stared straight back at him, not breaking eye contact.
âAre they having a fucking staring contest?â Exclaimed JJ.
You nodded, âand I won.â
âIâm Ethan, Iâm 24 but Iâm pretty sure you know that. If you swipe left then Iâll no longer give you access to my wardrobe.â
You sucked the air in between your teeth, âsee as funny as it would be for me to swipe left that is not something Iâm willing to risk.â
You put your hands in a heart as he joined the other boys. He smiled back to you and you knew youâd be stealing the very t-shirt he was wearing later.
As Freezy stepped up you took a sip of water from the bottle in hand, âHi. Iâm Cal, Iâm 26 and Iâm also taller than Behzinga.â
Ethan put his middle finger up at Freezy which made you nearly spit the water from your mouth. You managed to swallow the water before pointing a threatening finger at your boyfriend warning him to behave.
âIt just isnât funny when you steal the joke Freezy. But I guess thatâs why most your content isnât,â you mused, siding him to the left.
He staggered into JJ who brought him to the floor as he âdiedâ at your take down.
âYouâve managed to kill 2 of them today Y/N. I hope youâre proud,â Ethan huffed.
You nodded, âyeah and now Iâll steal all their subscribers. Thank you KSI for your help, Freezy less so.â
âCan we have her removed from the set please?â JJ complained, âsheâs destroying all of us.â
Vik shook his head, laughing, âitâs hilarious.â
âOnly because youâre on the other side of it, fam!â
A crew member called out to you all, âcan we move on to Harry please.â
When your best mate stepped up with his upside down notebook you burst out laughing, âIâm sorry Bog. Please continue.â
âUm, Iâm Harry, Iâm 24 and I actually have a poem for you.â
âLetâs hear it then.â
Harry cleared his throat to read, âRoses are red, the sun is bright, Y/N canât play bedwars, she is so shite.â
âInsulting her doesnât work,â shouted Stephen.
You flipped him off, âshut up Stephen. See I have some issues here. On one hand, youâre insulting me Harry but itâs also true. Plus, I actually wrote that poem Harry.â
The others 'ooedâ teasingly at your point before you continued, âbut because itâs you Iâm gonna say yes.â
He gave a little cheer and joined the others on the right, fist bumping Ethan.
The last one left was Josh, who you were praying wasnât going to say anything weird given that you saw him like a brother.
âIâm Josh, Iâm 29 and⌠no I just canât do it. Itâs too weird,â Josh laughed and walked to the right.
You breathed out a sigh of relief, âIâll be honest Iâm quite glad for that.â
With the boys all sorted to either side, the shoot was finally over and you were all free to go back to your flats.
You arrived back at your apartment to take a shower and change into Ethanâs t-shirt with a pair of leggings before joining him on the sofa to order takeaway and pick a movie.
He slid his arm easily around your shoulders, pulling you into him, allowing you to rest your head on his shoulder. You closed your eyes, the exhaustion of the long day finally hitting you.
âThank you for being in the video,â Ethan murmured in your ear.
You smiled into his shoulder, âit was fun. Any opportunity to take the piss out of the boys.â
#sidemen#sidemen imagine#behzinga#behzinga x reader#ethan payne#ethan payne x reader#sidemen x reader#mcyt
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â¨Merry Christmas â¨
I hope you all are having a wonderful holiday so far, if you celebrate. If you donât celebrate, then happy Saturday! I will have a winter fic up sometime in the coming weeks, maybe around New Years? I havenât decided yet. If today is a rough day for you, I love you and I hope this brings you some cheer. Even if it doesnât, I love and support you all and Iâm very proud weâve made it through this whole year. You all deserve the world.
Anyway, enough from me. Hereâs a Christmasy cubs fic ft. their chaos kittens, Mama, Ivory, and Lafayette, a creation courtesy of @ais-for-alex. Thank you very much for sharing all your headcanons on these three, theyâve been a delight! I did not read this through (are we surprised?) so there may be some errors, oops. Hope you enjoy lovelies xx
characters belong as always to @lumosinloveÂ
The winter air was biting cold when Logan opened the door and stepped onto the busy streets of downtown Gryffindor. People bustled by, heads ducked or phones held to their ears, children laughing and skipping along in the snow flurries. It brought a smile to his face, widened by the Christmas music playing through the street speakers, upbeat and cheerful. He loved winter.
Turning down the main street, Logan began walking back towards their apartment, laden down with bags of gifts for everyone he could think of, including their new kittens. The wind whipped at his cheeks, but he found he didnât mind it all that much. It made the thought of curling up on the couch when he got back that much better. Maybe Finn would make hot chocolate for him.Â
âHey loves, Iâm home!â he called as he pushed the door open to their place, warmth blasting him in the face. The air smelled delicious, presumably Leoâs doing, making Loganâs stomach grumble. He hadnât eaten in a few hours, distracted by all the shops.Â
âHey, Lo,â Finn called back from what sounded like the living room, but his voice was strained.
âYou alright?â Logan hurried about, putting his bags down and stripping off his heavy winter coat. He walked into the living room and froze, hand on the zipper of his jacket.
âUm⌠yes?â Leo answered his question hesitantly.Â
Leo and Finn both looked as if theyâd walked through a wind tunnel, hair sticking up in all directions. Finnâs shirt was askew, and seemed to have a new tear down the side. Leo was missing a sock. Before them lay their beautifully decorated Christmas tree, now a bit more horizontal than it had been mere hours before when Logan had left. And among the branches sat their orange tabby Lafayette, smug look evident in his mischievous eyes.Â
Logan snorted. âSeems like you two had fun.â
Leo sighed heavily.Â
âWhereâs Mama and Ivory?â Their other two cats, far better behaved than the little devil currently in front of him, were nowhere to be seen.Â
âIvoryâs in the piano, like always, and Mama was in the bedroom sunning herself last time I saw her,â Leo answered. He was trying to look upset, but the amused glitter in his eye gave it away.Â
âAre you two okay?â Logan laughed. He finished undoing his jacket, tossing it with his hat over the back of the nearby armchair. âThe tree didnât hit you?â
âNah, weâre fine,â Finn said easily. He had a small brush in his hand and appeared to be attempting to sweep up the fragments of shattered ornaments.Â
Leo was reaching for Lafayette, attempting to coax the kitten into his lap. Laf was having none of it, and if even Leo couldnât get him to move, Logan didnât have much hope.
âGuess we learned our lesson,â Leo grumbled. He seemed to give up being nice entirely and grabbed Lafayette by the scruff, lifting him from the wreckage and locking him in his crate nearby, ignoring the pitiful wails in protest. âRemind me why we got cats again?â
âBecause Finn came home with a malnourished, heavily pregnant cat from the streets and neither of us could say no to his pleading.â
âRight.â
âOh sure, blame it all on me.â
Logan rolled his eyes with a smile before placing a kiss to Finnâs head, then Leoâs. âIâm going to get the vacuum. Please donât break anything else while Iâm gone.â
âFuck you,â Leo called after him lightly. Logan laughed.
Logan found the vacuum easily, sitting where it always did in the hall closet. He peeked his head into their bedroom to check on Mama before heading back into the living room. True to Leoâs word, she lay stretched out on the bed in a pool of sunlight, silky white fur blending in with the snowflakes of their red holiday blanket. She lifted her head sleepily, seemingly sensing Loganâs presence, purred once, and laid back down, eyes drifting shut. Logan left her to her nap.
After about half an hour, the three of them had managed to get the living room relatively cleaned, broken ornaments tossed in the trash and swept off the floor, tree righted and standing upright once more, spilled water from the tipped tree stand mopped up. Leo still looked pouty, but Logan figured it had more to do with the mess and broken ornaments than anything. One had been a favorite of his, a tiny Hallmark ornament with two little birds perching on a branch.
âWeâll get you another one, love,â Finn murmured, pressing a kiss to the side of Leoâs head. So he had noticed that frown too.Â
Leo smiled softly. âThanks. In the meantime, what the hell are we gonna do with the tree? Evidently we canât just leave it standing, Laf will just knock it over again.â
âIâm a little surprised it lasted this long, honestly,â Logan admitted with a laugh. âThat little devil will get into anything.â It was true; their apartment now looked like a toddler lived there rather than three full-grown hockey players.Â
Finn eyed the ceilings curiously. It made Logan nervous.Â
âFinn. What are you thinking exactly?â
âWhat if we hung it from the ceiling?â
Leo and Logan both looked up. Leo squinted, judging the distance.
âIt may work,â he mused. âBut I think our current tree is too tall to do that. Laf will still be able to get at the bottom. And weâd have to put it somewhere central, where he canât climb on other things to reach it.â
âIvory will try to hit the bottom ornaments too,â Finn reminded them. Though calmer than her brother, Ivory still knew how to get into trouble when it suited her.
âHmm. Maybe next year weâll try it out,â Leo said. At Finnâs frown, he added, âWe leave for Quebec in two days, sweetheart. Itâd be pointless to try now.â
Finn sighed dramatically. âFine.â
The mess now fixed, Logan slumped onto the couch, energy completely drained. Between all the shopping and then cleaning up the tree, he hadnât sat down in what felt like hours. Leo sat next to him and Logan leaned into him, relishing in the warmth.Â
âWant me to make hot chocolate?â Finn asked, watching them fondly.
âYes, please,â Leo sighed.
âDonât burn anything.â
âHey! Hot chocolate is the one thing I can actually make, thank you very much.â Logan fought a grin.
Finn disappeared into the kitchen and Logan let his eyes slip shut. He felt Leo nose at his neck and cheek, breath warm on his bare skin. Logan met him for a gentle kiss, eyes still closed, sinking into the feeling.
âYou alright?â Leo asked quietly.
âJust tired.â
Leo just hummed and pressed soft kisses to his neck, gentle and comforting. Logan leaned into his touch even more, letting the feel of Leoâs lips on his neck and the hand rubbing his knee bring him back down. He felt his breaths slow and heart stop racing, body sinking into the cushions with each deep breath.Â
âDonât fall asleep on me,â came Leoâs soft voice.
ââM not,â Logan protested, but it held no conviction. He heard the kettle whistle in the kitchen, and forced his eyes open, knowing Finn would be back any second with their drinks.
Sure enough, footsteps sounded a moment later and Logan glanced over to see Finn trotting in, holding three precariously-placed mugs, steam rising from them all.Â
âHere you go, loves,â he sang, handing Logan and then Leo each a mug. He settled on Loganâs other side, squishing him even closer to Leo, and took a sip of his hot chocolate.Â
The three of them sat in content silence for a moment, enjoying their chocolate and the steady warmth and company of each other. Logan felt the warmth seep into his very bones, waking him up and settling him at the same time.Â
A pattering of tiny feet came from behind them just then, and Logan turned to see their other kitten Ivory standing in the doorway of the living room, white-tipped tail high in the air. She cocked her head, studying them, and then continued walking, around the couch to the coffee table in front of them.
âHey girl,â Finn cooed, holding out a hand to her. âWhereâs your brother, huh? Up to more trouble.â
âHeâs in my lap, Fish,â Leo laughed.Â
Logan startled and looked over, Finn doing the same. Sure enough, Lafayette was curled into Leoâs side, mischievous face softened in sleep. He was curled in a ball, limbs all tucked in tight, purring softly.
âWhen did he get over there?â Logan asked in astonishment.
âAnd how did we not hear him?â Finn added.Â
âYou were sleeping,â Leo shrugged.Â
âI wasnât sleeping,â Logan grumbled.Â
Ivory, much to Finnâs chagrin, was ignoring him completely, instead jumping into Loganâs lap with a purr. She kneaded his lap, painfully, before settling down with a contented sigh, looking up at Logan with her wide green eyes, the same shade as her brother. Her mottled brown fur was soft beneath Loganâs hand as he pet her gently. She dropped her head to his lap and closed her eyes, purring up a storm.
âGuess weâre staying here for the afternoon, then,â Finn chuckled quietly.Â
He switched the television on, volume low, and grabbed a book from the table, curling up into Loganâs side. Logan kept one hand in Ivoryâs fur, the other holding his still-warm mug. Leoâs hand was still rubbing gentle circles on Loganâs knee. He smiled and let his eyes slip shut again. It was a good afternoon.Â
#o'knutzy#cubs#christmas#holidays 2021#chaos kittens#fluff#just#pure fluff#sweater weather#coast to coast#vaincre#lumosinlove
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snow finch
diluc & gn!reader
970 words ⢠~7 min. read
summary: you enjoy a peaceful picnic with diluc near the winery.
warnings: none! just wholesome fluff <3
notes: i have a hc that the music at dawn winery is actually diluc playing the guitar and was really eager to write this for a long time!! hope you enjoy! :)
SPRING ARRIVED EARLY IN MONDSTADT this year, the fragrant flowers scattered across the vast hills showing signs of blooming as soon as late February. As you rest under the shade of a tree, protected from the scratchy grass by the picnic blanket that was laid out under your sleepy body, you recall that it had been quite a mellow winter season. Many of your days were usually spent inside the manor, curled up next to the fireplace reading a book or making small talk with the maids while Diluc worked his shifts at Angelâs Share or the winery. But now, Diluc was happy to spend one of his off days having a picnic, not only to enjoy the warmth of spring, but to finally enjoy some quality time with you after working hard in the winter.
âThe soft melody of Dilucâs guitar came to a gentle end. With an even gentler smile he glanced up at you, taking a deep breath as he studied your face. âThat was wonderful,â you couldnât help but compliment his skilled playing. Even though this was certainly the hundredth time you have listened to him play the guitar, you never got tired of each familiar song he had memorized from his youth.
ââYou are wonderful,â he crossed his arms over the body of his guitar to rest his chin, slightly leaning down to get closer to you. He grinned widely, making you giggle at how lovestruck he visibly was with you. âWould you like another song, dear?â
ââJust one more, please?â
ââAnything for you, my love.â
âAnd with that, he leaned back against the bark of the tree once more, his hands swiftly returning to their positions on the guitar as he reached further within his memory to find another song to play for you. As soon as he decided, he began to play with confidence, letting the vibrations of the strings accompany his low humming, creating resonance between his heart and yours.
âIt was rare for him to sit down and indulge in such a peaceful moment where he didnât have to worry about the guild, the people of Mondstadt, or the maintenance of the wine industry. All he had to focus on was remembering the notes to his songs for you, glancing up once in awhile to see your smile, and letting the wind brush his loosely tied hair. He wished every day was like this; that every day he could have meals with you on the hill overlooking the winery without a care in the world. But alas, as his song came to end, he knew eventually this beautiful day would come to an end too.
âNevertheless, he noticed your eyes were fluttering closed. Slowly, he placed his guitar down and dragged his knees to sit beside you, careful not to knock over any of the food near the perimeter of the blanket. He then managed to lay himself down next to you, allowing you to cuddle close to his chest with one arm wrapped around his stomach. He chuckled lightly at the way you cutely clinged to him, tucking one arm behind your neck and the other folded behind his own head, creating support for the both of you. With one deep breath, he averted his eyes from you to the tree branches above, studying the rustling of the leaves and the way they swayed with each slight gust of wind.
âThe two of you laid there for awhile, breathing in sync and enjoying the warmth of each othersâ company under the glistening midday sunlight. Diluc was the one to break the silence with a content hum as if he had just completed piecing together some thoughts in his head. âSnow finches,â he muttered quietly, âHm.â
ââWhat was that?â you softly responded through sleepy half lidded eyes.
ââSnow finches. You see them nesting up there?â he nodded his head towards the direction of a few snow finches bustling within the branches, preparing a small nest and chirping to each other. âTheyâre quite... cute. Arenât they?â
ââTheyâre so cute,â you teased him for using such an informal word to describe the white feathered family. He let out another light chuckle, slowly rubbing your back as you both studied the birds. There was no doubt that he was lovestruck in this moment with the way his heart fluttered as his bare hands connected with your warm figure.
ââWell, snow finches usually thrive in cold habitats. But since winter has passed, theyâre beginning to migrate to Dragonspine. Itâs likely theyâre nesting here temporarily because theyâre not quite ready to go yet. Spring did come earlier than usual, after all,â he shamelessly rambled, feeling proud for recalling such information about the species despite not having gone birdwatching in a while. Your eyes drifted back down to his chest, closely observing the buttons on his shirt and the way the folds in the fabric formed as he continued to soothe your ears with his voice.
ââDo you want to know what snow finches symbolize according to some silly childrenâs book I read once?â
ââWhat is it?â you whispered.
ââSnow finches represent joy and happiness,â Diluc managed to reach his hand up to run his fingers through your hair, taking some moments to massage your scalp and watch you smile in response. He grinned widely as he remained enchanted by your glowing face, sweet smile, and the way your hair softly wrapped around his fingers.
âIn his eyes, perfection laid in his arms, clinging to him tightly and drifting into a sweet slumber. He leaned down momentarily to plant a kiss on the crown of your head.
ââI suppose that makes you my little snow finch, dear.â
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(via PROUD SUPPORTER OF SNOW DAYS Lightweight Sweatshirt by KatisDesign)
#findyourthing#redbubble#redbubble artist#redbubble shop#proud supporter of snow days#snow lover#winter lover#snow days#t-shirt design#snow flakes#snowfall
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Hey Neighbor (Epilogue)
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 3498 Warnings: fluff
Summary: You had a plan and then life came along with one of its own. With your future almost derailed you worked hard to get yourself back on track and finally everything seemed to be going right⌠that is, until your new neighbor moved in.
A/N: This is it đĽşđĽş Iâm so sad weâre at the end but I couldnât be happier by all of your reactions, even when things werenât at their best I loved hearing your screams. Now we can all cry together as we say goodbye. Thank you so much for reading their story. Btw I started a Patreon for those who would like to support me.Â
HEY NEIGHBOR PART 25Â | HEY NEIGHBOR MASTERLIST
Breath fogs the window as you stare out of it, a grey haze has rolled over the city, the sky a sunless landscape of thick clouds and cold winds. It snowed the other day and what remains on the streets has become soot covered or murky slush. Itâs nicer to stare at the white dusting on the branches of the trees below, taking in the soft peace of the afternoon.
The world has grown quieter over the past few weeks, your world at least. You canât say the same for the hoards of people in Times Square, packed like sardines as they count down the hours for the ball to drop.
Graduation was behind you. Nearly two weeks ago you finally crossed that stage to receive your diploma. Technically the real one was still coming in the mail but itâs the symbolism that counted. All of your friends cheered as your name was called, tears of joy and relief welling up in your eyes as you did itâ you finally did it!
Wanda hugged you tight afterwards, both of you letting your tears fall. She adjusted your graduation cap, decorated with a lightning bolt for Pietro. It was the first thing you did when you received your garments, to make sure a part of him was with you on such an important day. You left her arms for Peggy and Steveâs, then Sam, Natasha and Clint and then there was Bucky.
He grabbed his crutches, lifting himself up from the chair though you didnât make him walk. A few steps closed the gap between you and you held him, your arms securing around him as a precaution as he balanced on one leg.
His smile was so beautiful as he murmured, âIâm so proud of you,â holding his gaze before you kissed tenderly, humming against his lips.
Youâve been dating ever since that day in the hospital and life couldnât be better, especially since you and Bucky laid out some terms. From now on you would always be honest with each other, never holding back your feelings. You were a team who loved and respected each other to talk and more importantly listen.
Bucky managed well on crutches but there were still things he couldnât do, taking for granted days he could have gone outside for a walk. Sure he had muscles, but his arms were killing him, especially on the days he had to go to the doctor for a checkup. He started physical therapy too, to keep up with strength and flexibility for the rest of his body.
It was exhausting but you were there to help him almost every step of the way. Showering was a pain though Bucky insisted on some independence, wrapping up his cast as he sat on a cold plastic chair that extended over the tub. It made him feel like he had aged 80 years but he got over it.
You did what you could to help him heal but the greatest comfort Bucky found was when you were cuddling together. He cherished those moments the most, when you held him, resting your head against his chest, or when his head was in your lap as he stretched across his couch, your fingers lazily combing through his hair.
It was the quiet moments together, crossing the threshold of intimacy in new ways. This was the slowest Bucky has ever gone since he was in middle school, swallowing a nervous gulp before asking if it was okay to hold a girlâs hand.
Life after had been a blur; his guard up, women in and out, no chance to settle, in and out, no connection, faces blend together, names are nothing more than letters on his phone for a good time, in and out. It was all noise, a constant buzzing in his head until you came into his life.
Youâve opened Buckyâs ears and the noise became sweet music. Youâve opened his heart, the melody it sings is a love song and heâs soaring. He doesnât waste time on regrets, instead he spends each and every day getting to know you and love you in new ways. Â
You celebrated Thanksgiving together, with his parents coming to your apartment so Bucky didnât have to travel. George brought most of the food over, it wasnât barbecue but it was just as delicious. And this year you had the time to bake a pumpkin pie.
Your days were spent working at The September Foundation up until graduation. Elena hired you for Metro-General and you start there on the first Monday of the new year. Ideally, youâd like to still volunteer when you can and knowing Tony itâs something he fully supported. Things couldnât be better.
âDoll, are you ready?â
Buckyâs voice pulled you away from the window and you climb off his bed and into his waiting arms. The basketball shorts he wears reveals his skinny left leg, paler than the other thanks to the dry flakiness heâs still working on remedying. He was in a cast for almost three months and just got it off a few days ago. You went with him, holding his hand as he beared weight on his weak muscle after so long.
He just finished the strengthening exercises he was supposed to do every day and now he needed to shower. You both did actually since tonight was Natasha and Clintâs annual New Yearâs Eve party. You pull your shirt off, tossing it somewhere behind you and Bucky follows you to the bathroom. He can shower without his seat now but it doesnât mean he didnât want help and you happily obliged. The water ran cold by the time you actually finished and you really didnât mind at all. Now that Buckyâs cast was off you were looking forward to getting even more physical again.
Though you showered at his place you finished getting ready at yours since you could. Living next door to your boyfriend was obviously convenient. You were able to be together and still have the space you needed. For now it worked though you can see yourself moving in together. A smile stretches across your face when you think of it, Bucky playing his music, no walls in between, a far cry from how things began.
You open your closet to find a dress that would work for the theme of this yearâs party which they claimed was winter except they asked all their guests to wear either red or green. You bit your tongue, thinking that sounded more Christmas than winter but you didnât argue, it wasnât your party. You pulled out a crimson colored dress that had a beautiful lace overlay. The back was sheer and though it was a little short you felt it was seasonally appropriate with its long sleeves. You finished your hair and makeup, finishing off with gold chandelier earrings and peep-toe heels.
A rhythmic knock rapped at your door and you knew it was Bucky. Opening the door your jaw dropped. Maybe it was the fact that you had mostly seen him in shorts and sweatpants over the last three months, and not that he didnât make those look good, but the outfit he was wearing now looked incredible. He looked sharp in a juniper green suit with a soft tartan design, a brighter green patterned tie stood out against his light shirt. His shoes were dark brown with a hint of mahogany that reflected in the light and even though he looked amazing you were surprised he didnât opt for sneakers to be more comfortable with his leg.
âFuck, you look beautiful,â he spoke first, biting his lip as he looked at you up and down.
He shaved since you left him and your hands went to cup the smooth skin of his cheek. âNot more beautiful than you.â
You pressed your lips to Buckyâs, deepening the kiss with your tongue which was probably a bad idea since it only increased your urge to rip Buckyâs suit off and take him right there. You forced yourself back from him, walking towards your couch to grab your bag.
Bucky followed you as quickly as he could considering walking still felt a little strange. His arms went around your waist pulling you closer to him as his lips began to kiss your cheek, trailing down your neck. You hummed in delight, exhaling stuttered breaths, almost losing yourself to his touch before you pulled yourself out of it.
âWe canât,â you stressed, reluctantly. âWeâre gonna be late, come on.â
He sighed acceptingly, waiting for you to unplug your phone and grab your keys. Just before you were ready to leave his arms wrapped around your waist one more time and Bucky spoke before you could say anything.
âI love you, Y/N.â
The swell of your heart reached your lips as you gazed into Buckyâs eyes repeating the same words youâve known and felt for so long. After another sweet kiss you locked up your place to take the long trip up one flight.
Clint greeted you at the door, his arms pulling you and Bucky into warm welcoming hugs. Unlike his guests, Clint was dressed in a white suit jacket, with black pants and a matching bow tie. He welcomed you into the apartment that was not filled with as many people as you expected.
There were familiar faces in your friends, including Sam who was able to take off this year. Right away Bucky teased him about his red suit calling him Elmo.
âYeah whatever Kermit. And what about this one?â Sam teased, pointing at Steve. âThatâs all you had?â
Steve blushed pink, feeling insecure about his outfit choice, a cozy forest green cable-knit sweater. âLike Iâm supposed to have a fruit punch suit in my closet?â
âItâs cranberry and I look good,â Sam declared, smoothing his hands down the front of his jacket.
You let the boys continue to have fun as you said hello to Wanda and Peggy, both looking beautiful in their dresses. âWhereâs Natasha?â
They shook their heads. âHavenât seen her,â Wanda said, heading towards their marble island to grab a drink.
It was decorated with a row of mason jars, each filled a quarter of the way with coarse sugar mimicking crystal snow, with a candle in every other one and a chunk of bright red cranberries and sprays of cedar leaves sticking out of the others.
âBut we just got here, so I dunno,â she finished.
You were looking around for familiar guests, surely the partners of her law firm would be coming again. An older woman sat on the couch talking to another unfamiliar face, the back of their heads glowing thanks to the curtain of twinkle lights that decorated the large walls of the living room. In the corner was their Christmas tree, a tall spruce decorated with frosted pine cone garland, matte red ornaments and thick burlap ribbon.
Clint brushed passed you, kneeling in front of the older woman who looked curiously familiar. Nervous energy was pouring off of him, from the way he kept chewing his nails to the constant tremble of his leg. He smiled as he passed you again standing near the door. With Natasha still not in sight you decided to do a little digging, by way of introducing yourself.
You walked over to the woman Clint had been speaking to, standing in front of her and the two people she was mid-conversation with. The man was big, his Santa-like belly was testing the buttons of his red shirt as it stretched across the material. His eyebrows were bushy and his brown hair was long in the front, looking a little messy as if it had been brushed through with only his fingers. He had a long beard that matched the color of his hair though it had a lot more grey in it.
The woman was beautiful. The emerald top she wore brought out the green flecks of her hazel eyes and her red lips drew you right into her beautiful smile. Her dark hair was braided with a crown, the rest of the locks falling onto her shoulders.
You caught their attention, extending your hand with a smile as you introduced yourself. The older woman spoke first, her voice as soft as a songbird as she told you her name, Edith, followed by the fact that she was Clintâs mother. Well, that explains it. You see the similarities now, the glasses she wore didnât hide the fact that they shared the same eyes. Even her mouth was the same, thin lips that grew into the same beaming smile.
âIâm Melina,â the beautiful woman said with a Russian accent. âThis is Alexei.â She pointed to the man who smiled at you. His grip was strong as he took your hand in his meaty paw. âWeâre like family to Natalia,â he grinned proudly.
âItâs so nice to meet you all!â you said, sitting beside them to talk all while in the back of your mind your brain was working to put together why they were here. Sure itâs a holiday but family members have never come to Clint and Natashaâs for New Years before. In fact, Natasha doesnât even have family. The only âfamilyâ you knew of would have to come from Russia toâ
Holy shit.
You find an acceptable way out of the conversation, rushing over to Bucky and pulling him away from his conversation. Your hands are jittering with excited energy, eyes as wide as your mouth is open.
âBucky, donât you see what this is?!â
He looks confused for a moment before his attention is diverted. Bucky looks past you to another unfamiliar person that walked in. Itâs a man with brown skin dressed in all black. A dark goatee framed his face and the straps of an eye patch secure comfortably around his hairless head. Though Bucky tried not to stare he couldnât help but notice the veining of scars stretching out across his temple and cheek. He stands tall and silent with his arms clasped behind his back waiting.
Clint cleared his throat, a nervous smile settling on his face. âNow that everyoneâs here Iâd like to welcome you to⌠our wedding.â
Gasps of surprise fill the room with everyone rushing up towards Clint as he tries to field questions, hoping no one was truly mad at the abrupt announcement. âI knew it,â you whispered under your breath, gently slapping at Buckyâs arm.
The man in black walked towards the front of the living room, clearly the officiate who asked everyone to get settled as they were about to begin. Clint knocked once on his bedroom door, before taking his place beside the man who introduced himself as Nick.
A young woman with blonde hair slipped out of the door. She nodded to him, cracking a hint of a smile before she settled next to Melina. A moment later everyoneâs eyes were drawn to the sound of the bedroom door creaking open again.
Natasha stepped out looking like a dream, in a floor length shimmering ivory gown that showed off her well sculpted shoulders with its high halter neckline, embellished with beautiful beading. She clutched a delicate bouquet of white roses and winter greens with cranberry sprigs woven throughout. Natasha walked up to Clint without fanfare, just the audible sighs of those around her admiring the back of her dress, dazzling and tasteful cut outs that showed off more of her toned body. The fabric cinched above the small of her back, a small train sweeping around her feet.
She handed her bouquet off to the blonde girl, her âsisterâ you presumed, remembering an old conversation with Clint. Brushing back a loose tendril from her face, Natasha smiled widely as she stared at Clint, bringing her hands forward to connect with his.
Nick began speaking and you took out your phone to capture a quick picture as the impromptu ceremony began. Buckyâs hand found yours, lacing your fingers together as you watched your friends exchange their vows.
Clintâs hands communicated his words in sync as he spoke them. âNatasha, what more can I say to the person that knows me better than I know myself. Because of you the sun shines a little brighter each day, flowers have a sweeter fragrance and my heart is filled with treasured memories. Even the not so great ones like that time in Budapest that I know we remember very differently.â
A chuckle simmers amongst the small crowd and Natasha dips her head down to laugh.
âBecause of you my heart found a home, and like my stomach, it will never be empty...â Clint smiled, taking Natashaâs hands in his. â...because it will always be filled with your love, a love that I promise you I will never let go.â
Natasha sniffs, brushing aside a tear as she gathers her thoughts. âClint, youâve given me a second chance in life, youâve shown me what friendship and love truly mean. I promise to trust and respect you and give you the best of myself. I promise to always fight for you, never against you, to be by your side through whatever life brings. I promise to make sure we always have snacks in the house and to clean up all the stains from your shirts when you drop food on them.â
Clintâs shoulders shrugged with acceptance as he chuckled under his breath, âIt happens a lot.â
âYes it does,â Natasha repeated, smiling wider. She exhaled a deep breath before continuing. âI promise to love you through the good times and bad and to choose our love every single day. You are my best friend, my soulmate and I'm the luckiest person on Earth to be able to call you mine.â
You felt Bucky press a kiss to your temple, leaning his head against you as the ceremony continued. When it was time Alexei dug into his pocket, pulling out the rings. With Nickâs concluding words Natasha wrapped her arms around Clintâs neck, and his held her waist; their love sealed with a kiss as everyone cheered in celebration.
They pulled back from each other, Clint resting his forehead against Natashaâs. He brought his hand up, bending his middle and ring finger into his palm. Natasha did the same, their fingertips touching as they signed âI love youâ before turning to face their friends and family.
Edith was the first to hug the newly married couple who made their way through everyone until they got to you. Bucky and Clint hugged as he congratulated them. âI canât believe this.â
âI can.â Natasha laughed, pressing her cheek to Buckyâs as they hugged. She moved to you and you wrapped your arms around her tightly. âWeâve been planning this wedding for so long it was never going to happen unless we did it this way.â
âIt was perfect,â you said, pulling back from your hug with a huge smile. âCongratulations, Iâm so happy for you both.â
As the night went on you formally met Yelena, the blonde who Natasha grew up with, and learned about her exciting work. You were in similar fields as she worked to free people of human trafficking, mostly young girls that were to be indoctrinated into radical terrorist groups for forced marriage or even espionage.
Her work was more hands-on as she physically raided underground bunkers or warehouses. It made you feel like you werenât doing enough even though you knew that wasnât true. All the years spent working towards your goal reaffirmed that, and in just a few days youâll officially move into your office in Metro-General, across from Elenaâs as you begin doing what youâve always wanted to do, help people.
Youâre lost in a comfortable stare as you look at the Christmas tree, realizing the countdown to midnight had begun.
Ten! Nine! Eight! ...
You turn around, looking for Bucky in the small room that was crowded with everyone standing so close together, huddled around the TV that showed the view from Times Square.
Seven! Six ...
The shimmering ball was descending and you were alone untilâŚ.
Five! Four! ...
âHey neighborâŚâ A voice called and you spun around relieved. Bucky smiled, bringing you close into his arms.
Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!
He leaned in, his lips hovering above yours, pausing as you spoke above the roar of cheers. âHave I ever told you how happy I am that you moved in here?â you purred.
âEvery day. Itâs like music to my ears.â
Bucky smiled tenderly, sealing the small gap between you, kissing you softly as he poured all the love from his heart out and into yours. Your hearts beat to the rhythm of your own symphony, a song that had a rocky beginning of notes that stretched high and low, but now it was a steady ballad you would continue to create together with your love.
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đFirst Timesđ
A/N : This is an extra for my first ever series I Forgot That You Existed. Feedback and suggestions are always welcome.
Pairing :Â Dad! Tom Holland x Reader
Summary : Your and Tom's first Christmas with your baby girl.
Warnings : fluff
There's something about first times. The first time riding a bicycle, first love, going on your first date, first kiss. There's an unknown excitement in it, a thrill, a feeling of adventure. Those first times will always be special. Just like your first Christmas with your baby girl.Â
After 3 years of marriage you and Tom are proud parents of your one and only daughter Vienna. She was the apple of your eye after all she's your first born. The first time you got to know that you were pregnant was during one of your recording sessions when you suddenly felt nauseous and had to run to the bathroom to throw up. You knew this wasn't mere food poisoning from your past experience and to be honest you and Tom had been trying for a baby for quite some time after you finally decided that you are ready to embrace motherhood again.Â
You were rather thrilled than scared this time while you took the test and seeing the two pink lines made your heart swell as a few tears of joy slipped your eyes. When Tom returned home you just ran into his arms to reveal the news that you were expecting and joy knew no bounds for him. He immediately lifted you up and spinned you around in the living room in excitement.Â
The first time you went for your check up and saw your baby girl on the monitor Tom was literally sobbing. You were being very careful this time. During the last trimester Tom didn't want to leave your side at all. You had to literally throw him out of the house (pun intended) to go for his shoots.Â
You couldn't believe how time flew so fast that the little human you both brought to this earth is almost a year old now. It felt like yesterday you brought her from the hospital wrapped in a blanket in your arms and now she crawls around the house as well as has learnt to stand on her little feet. You never get tired of listening to her continuous babbles with some broken words she has learnt eventually.Â
And not to be surprised her first word was obviously âDadaâ ofcourse she was daddy's girl because the way Tom has spoiled her rotten since the day she was born you really are gonna have a hard time in future saying no to her and hearing that Tom went on a shopping spree that day, if he could he would have bought the whole toy shop you thought.Â
Christmas was around the corner and everyone was in their festive mood. You were in the kitchen baking cookies when your husband came down the stairs hastily.Â
"Honey where is my Christmas jumper?" he asks from across the living room.Â
"Tom, what is your obsession with that old jumper? Now even the jumper also says let me go Thomas." You joke from the kitchen. Tom huffs rolling his eyes.Â
"That jumper carries a lot of sentimental value for me. C'mon now tell me where is it?" he whines.Â
"It's in the left bottom shelf of the cupboard." You yell from the kitchen.Â
"I already looked there."
"Then look hard it's there only." Sometimes you really feel that you are actually looking after two babies.
Tom ran upstairs again to your bedroom where your 12 months old daughter was sleeping peacefully. He searched through the cupboard and finally found his jumper but the noise he made while doing it woke Vienna up. Tom turned to see his little princess sitting up on the bed with sleepy eyes.Â
"Oh did I wake you up bubs? So sorry peanut. Daddy was looking for his jumper." He went and sat beside her on the bed. She instantly got up on his lap, her little hands clutching onto his t-shirt as support and standing up. Tom forgot about everything and began playing with her, her little giggles making his heart melt. After a while she started to get a little fussy and Tom knew that his baby girl was hungry.Â
"I know baby it's time for you to have some brekkie, let's see what mommy is doing eh."Â
"Look whoâs up." Tom announces cheerfully walking down the stairs. You turned around and your face instantly lit up seeing your morning sunshine resting her head on her daddy's shoulder suckling her thumb.Â
"Aww you are up my little pumpkin wait a moment mommy is almost done" Tom strolled around the house with her. He went and stood near the glass doors overlooking his snow covered lawn.Â
"Look at that peanut, it's snowing isn't it beautiful." He cooed, rocking her gently in his arms making her giggle. Tom was about to slide the door open to the lawn to take her out.Â
"Tom it's freezing outside, V isn't wearing enough warm clothes. She will catch a cold" You stopped him.Â
"Your mommy is way too paranoid." Tom says rolling his eyes dramatically looking at your daughter.
"I can hear you." You say in a sing-song manner from the kitchen. Tom makes his way to you in the kitchen.Â
"Here I can do the rest of the batch" he offers, taking the tray from your hand."My little princess needs to be fed first." He says and you take Vienna from his arms. Tom continued with preparing the rest of the batch of cookies as you fed your daughter.Â
Later in the evening you were busy decorating the christmas tree with Tom when you noticed Vienna playing and tugging on to some wires. You panicked out of your motherly instinct.
"Baby no don't touch it, you'll get hurt." You came rushing, taking away the lights from her small hands. She stared at you with her doe eyes for a while before crawling away to get the other decorating stuff from the box.
"God, she's such an active baby, never sits in one place." You shake your head smiling.Â
"Well she's my daughter." Tom says proudly.
"Okay Billy Elliot, now go and put Billy Elliot Jr in the crib or else she will not let us set up the tree." Tom did as you said as he placed Vienna in the crib when your attention went to the lights you were holding in your hands and you frowned.
"Tom, why did you bring the bigger lights?"Â
"Why what's the problem with the big one?" He asks casually.
"Tom the big ones are for the lawn and the small ones are for the tree. It has always been like that." you state in disappointment.
"For a change let's put the big ones on the tree this year." He suggests.
"No way! it will look odd." you say annoyed.Â
"Gosh you're such a control freak." he huffs.Â
"No I'm not, it's just my tastes are better than yours." You retort. Soon you both began arguing and seeing the tension between her parents Vienna started crying. Both of you stopped arguing as your full attention turned to your one year old and you both felt guilty of arguing in front of her.
"Aww baby did we scare you? We are so sorry honey." You rushed to her picking her in your arms, rocking her gently pacifying her. She stopped crying after sometime. You sat down on the couch with Tom beside you.
"We shouldnât have fought like that on such a petty issue Iâm sorry I over reacted." You felt sorry.
"No itâs my fault that I messed up the lights, Iâm sorry Y/N" Tom apologises
"Hey itâs ok we can put the big ones this year." Tom and you leaned in for a reconciliation kiss but was interrupted by your little munchkinâs hand as if she didnât want you to kiss Tom.
"Someone seems to be a little possessive." You pout scrunching your nose.
"Well what can I say my little girl loves her dad more, isnât it princess?" He boops her nose gently to which she giggles.
"Donât flatter yourself mister." you snicker.
"Aww donât get disheartened, love." you slap his chest playfully.
"Shut up and do the rest of the decoration I need to put her to sleep, itâs almost her nap time."Â
"Okay mam." You took Vienna with you to the bedroom to put her to sleep while Tom carried on with the rest of the decorations. After finishing he went upstairs to call you for watching a movie together.
"Hey Y/N" Tom popped his head through the door.
"Shh!" You hush him immediately. "She just fell asleep". You whisper.
"Sorry." He mouths. I have set up everything. He whispers.
"Okay Iâll be down in a minute." You whisper back. You went down to the living room to find two cups of tea and snacks kept on the coffee table while Tom was lounging on the couch busy choosing a christmas movie to watch for tonight. You went and sat on the couch snuggling close to him resting your head on his broad chest, he smiled wrapping his arm around you. Even though you were totally enjoying parenthood, you also cherished these alone times with your husband. Just two of you cuddled close into each otherâs warm embrace. The intimacy of the moment is so soothing and relaxing after a long day. You wondered what you did to get this perfect man as your husband with whom you brought an angel in your lives. You felt you have everything you could have asked for and you are grateful. Tom noticed you lost in deep thought.
"Whatâs going on in this little mind?" He taps on your head lightly.
"Just can't imagine she's already one. Soon she will go to school then college and a few years later she might bring a boy for the Christmas Dinner to meet with us and then get married and have her own children" you went on as Tom perked up.
"Woah woah slow down, love. You are going way too fast forward. And moreover she isn't dating until she turns 30." He says like a protective father, you let out an airy laugh.
"Look now who's been paranoid huh?" you raise a sly brow.
"Well you know thereâs a lot of no good sons of bit.."Â
"Uh uh language." You interrupt.
"Sons of butterflies out there." He corrected his dialogue as you both chuckle softly turning your attention back to the movie playing in front of you.Â
........................................................
Taglist in bio.
#tom holland#tom holland one shot#tom holland x reader#tom holland fluff#tom holland imagines#tom holland x you#tom holland x y/n#dad!tom#christmas
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Fairy Godfather, part 1
Summary:Â The fairies have asked a monumental favor of Killian: be the surrogate for their babiesâall nine of them. He's been pregnant before, but this? This is a whole other level. What has he gotten himself into? And just how big will he get?
A/N:Â As usual, the muse has gone off and done whatever it wants to do, rather than, y'know, work on a WIP. Alas. The idea for this came about when I sent @sancocnutclubâ this picture of a woman who was supposedly pregnant with 10 babies; it has since come out as a hoax, but dangâher BUMP. Subsequent doodling and headcanoning brought about this story (also partly inspired by a conversation with SherlockianWhovian a while back), and here we are! I should note that this also takes place after a couple of past one-shots, which can be found here and here. Hope you like it!
rated T / 3k words / AO3
Of all the requests put in front of Killian in his long life, this was by far the oddest.
âYou want me...to carry babies...for how many of you?â he asked, trying to wrap his head around the query.
âNine,â Blue answered matter-of-factly. âNormally, it wouldnât be so many, but weâre past due for a brood. There was just no one around who we thought could handle it.â
âAnd he can?â Emma was at his side in the booth at Grannyâs, where Blue and Tink had requested to meet with them. Their daughter, Hope, was sitting in the high chair at the end of the table, making a mess of some oatmeal.Â
âIt helps if theyâve given birth before,â Tink replied. Well, he had done thatânot intentionally, but he had been the one to carry and birth Hope, who was 10 months old now.
And while it had ended up being a beautiful experience, he obviously had reservations. âYes, but that was only one babyâand you genuinely think I can handle nine?â
âWe do,â Blue confirmed. âAnd weâd obviously provide as much help as we can.â
âIt also wouldnât be like a normal human pregnancy,â Tink added. âNo morning sickness or cravings, or anything like that.â
âNo, Iâd just be massive,â he sighed; memories of his own perceived whale-like proportions toward the end of his pregnancy with Hope were still fresh; this had potential to put that to shame.
âWell, fairy newborns are smaller than the average human infantâless than 4 pounds. But yes, you would go full term.â Blue was awfully clinical in her statements.
Killian glanced down at his midsection, which had yet to fully regain its previous flatness, and he doubted it ever would. Especially not if he agreed to this. âIâm really your only option?â he asked again. âWhat about David?â
âItâs too soon,â Blue answered. David gave birth a couple months prior to their daughter Ruth, and as promised, Killian was at his side. However, heâd had to have a C-section, which slowed his recovery a bit compared to Killianâs. âAnd it must be done at the upcoming winter solstice, or weâll have to wait another few years.â
Killian was about to suggest that until Tink jumped in. âPlus, you kind of still owe us for the whole hat thing.â
âThat was the Dark One and you know it,â Emma snapped back, but they both knew Killian still harbored a fair amount of guilt over that. It was a low blow on their part, but not undeserved.Â
She most likely saw the acceptance in his eyes when they exchanged a glance, but he also saw she wasnât quite there. âDoes it really have to be a guy?â she enquired, turning back to the fairies. âI mean, there are lots of women here who meet your criteria, too.â
âIt does,â they said simultaneously, though Tink at least looked somewhat apologetic.Â
Emma was ready to protest again, but he put his hand over hers on the table and told her with a look that it was okay. She reclined in her seat while he turned back to the pair. âIâll agree, but with one condition: youâll have to help pick up my slackâaround town and at home,â he said evenly. He was sure heâd get to a point when it wasnât feasible for him to continue as deputy, or at the library, or even keep up with Hope, who was dangerously close to walking.Â
âActually, one more,â Emma added. âHeâs not on the hook for any, like, actual fatherhood, right? You wonât be coming after him for child support or anything?â
âNo, he's simply the surrogate,â Blue confirmed.Â
âAnd weâll definitely help outâwhatever you need,â Tink added.Â
Emma gave him a tentative but supportive look. âThen Iâll do it,â he told them.Â
âExcellent,â Blue stated with less enthusiasm than he expected. âWeâll send you more information soon, but the most important thing is to be at the convent next Saturday. Green,â she then turned to Tink, âcome; we have much to do to prepare.â (Which was a polite way of asking her to slide out of the booth first.)
Tink rolled her eyes and stood up. âIâll text you,â she said, and the two flitted out of the diner.
Killian and Emma were silent for a long moment after they left, other than making sure some oatmeal actually ended up in Hopeâs mouth.Â
Emma started to clean up the baby and then said, âI know itâs too late now, but are you sure about this?â
âNot entirely,â he confessed, âbut they were rightâI do owe them.â
âYou donât,â Emma said matter-of-factly, âeven though I know you think you do.â She wiped the mess off Hopeâs face. âBut if this will finally relieve some of that guilt, then I get it, and Iâll support you.â
âThank you, love,â he sighed, and pressed a kiss to her temple. âIâm going to need it, I think.â
âOh, you are,â she said wryly. âAnd you should probably start planning how youâll tell my dad.â
âBloody hell,â he cursed, then dragged a hand down his face. âHeâs going to be relentless.â What had been playful ribbing during their respective pregnancies was likely about to be amplified.Â
âMaybe you can talk to Belle? See if she knows anything on what to expect? Pun not intended.â
âYeah, thatâs a good idea,â he agreed, then followed Emma as she slipped out of the booth. He pulled Hope from the high chair and settled her in his left arm, then grabbed her diaper bag and slung it over his shoulder. âGuess weâll pick her brain now. See you later.â They kissed farewell and headed off to their respective jobs that dayâEmma at the station, Killian at the library, where heâd taken something of an assistant librarian position (and could keep an eye on Hope and her âcousinâ Gideon in between reshelving and assisting patrons).
Belle was surprised when he told him about the morningâs turn of events, but then got an almost academic excitement. âI canât say I know much about their physiology, and I didnât know this about their reproduction, but letâs see if we have anything.â
She dove into research while he took care of normal library functions, but by midday, didnât have much to show for it.Â
âTheyâre so secretive! Obviously their existence is documented, and thereâs mention of someone other than Blue being in charge at some point in the past, and that their young mature faster than average, but thatâs it. What did they tell you?â
âNot much,â he answered, relaying what little heâd been told. âBut they did call it a âbroodâ, so it sounds like multiples are common. Just not quite so many.â
âDo you think theyâd let me take notes?â she wondered. âItâs not like there's any research journals on magical beings I could submit a paper to, but more for my own study.âÂ
âIf they donât let you, I wonât do it,â he commented. âDo you still have everything from last time?â Sheâd done quite a bit of documentation on his first pregnancy, considering it was the product of a misunderstood spell.
âOf course; Davidâs, too.â Then she laughed. âOf all the things I imagined becoming an expert in, magical male pregnancy was not one of them.â
âSomeone had to,â he countered.
âThatâs true!â
---------------------------------------------------------
The rest of the week was fairly uneventful, save for a text from Tink telling them when to arrive at the convent, and to make sure he ate lots of greens and wore something comfortable (which he took to mean stretchy). And they assented to Belleâs presence, too, which didnât change anything but did make him feel more at ease.
David was something between amused and horrified about what Killian had agreed to, but ultimately glad they hadnât asked him.
The afternoon of the solstice, before they headed to the convent, Belle took some notes and measurements of Killian as a baseline for her studyâand honestly, he was kind of glad, if the proportions on this were going to be as overlarge as he expected. âHow big do they make those maternity pants?â he asked Emma as Belle was making note of his waist size (not significantly larger than it used to be, he was at least proud to say).Â
Emmaâs eyes grew large. âI donât know; I think the fairies are gonna have to help with that one.â
âLetâs hope thatâs a ways off, then,â he settled.Â
They dropped Hope off at Snow and Davidâs on their way to the convent, where they were greeted by Blue herself. She ushered them in without a word, and a couple other fairies were there to gather their belongings, before Blue guided them further into the building. Killian was both surprised and not to see that they were all in their traditional attire, though he was a bit shocked that they were all still large and not the miniscule size they were known for. Belle had had a similar question a few days ago; theyâd ask at some point.Â
They were led into a large, candlelit room, where Tink suddenly appeared in front of him. âDrink this,â she commanded, holding a mug of steaming liquid, âand take off your shirt.â
âIs that necessary?â he asked as he took the mug.
âI mean, I already know whatâs under there, so I wouldnât be asking if it wasnât,â she countered with a wink.
He complied with a sigh. The drink was a potion of some sort, he gathered almost immediately; a warm, tingly feeling took over his body as he drank it, eventually settling in his stomach, which made sense. Weirdly, though, when he removed his tshirt, there was a slight glow under the skin of his abdomen. (Belle was off to the side, furiously taking notes; Emma was next to her, trying to keep a straight face and surreptitiously taking pictures.)
Blue was watching a clock, and when it struck a seemingly random timeâthe peak of the solsticeâshe began chanting in a tongue he didnât quite recognize, with others gradually joining in and forming a circle around him. The glow under his skin got brighter, especially in his midsection, although he didnât feel any differentâyet.
âHuman,â Blue finally addressed him. âYou have agreed to be the vessel for our young. Do you promise to protect them with your life, and care for them until they are ready to join our world?â
âI...yes,â he answered, as confidently as he could manage. âI will.â
Blue continued briefly in the foreign tongue, as did the others. âNow, let the gravidation commence.â
One of the fairies approached him with her hands cupped as the rest continued to chant; she was dressed all in pink, and he thought heâd seen her spending time with Grumpy on occasion. As she got closer, he saw a small ball of pink light pulsing her palm that she was murmuring to, until she was close enough to touch him.Â
And she did, guiding the ball of light toward his navel and thenâit disappeared inside him as she pressed her hands against his stomach. He felt a small twinge inside as it settled within, but no painâjust a spark. The glow from his midsection briefly took on a pinkish hue, but then returned to the white color it had been emanating.
Each of the nine fairies did the same thing, one by one. He did wonder how it was decided who would be reproducing, given that there were far more than nine fairies present, but that was another question for a later date. They appeared before him in all colors of the spectrumâpurple, seafoam, navy, yellow, fuschiaâand then Tiger Lilyâs deep orange joined the array of hues, followed by Tinkâs bright green.
Blue was the last to approach, and her orb seemed to be the biggest of them all, which he supposed was no surprise. However, her hands lingered on his abdomen and she continued to chant, the intensity and volume increasing as everyoneâs voices joined in.
He suddenly felt a slight cramp withinâstill nothing painful, but like his insides were being gently rearranged, which they probably were. Then his stomach glowed brighter, casting all the colors of the fairies whose offspring he was now carrying around the room.
âGods above, watch over this man; let he be exalted among the fairies, and let no harm befall him nor our bairns,â Blue called out with a sense of finality.
The glow grew brighter, until it was too bright for him to look at, but then was gone in a flash. The fairies gave a collective hum that seemed to resolve the ceremony, and then began to file out of the room, although Tink approached and wrapped him in a soft robe.
He felt...he wasnât sure. Content, at the very least, but also like he might float away were it not for the sensation of a weight within him holding him down. His hand drifted to his midsection, and if he wasnât mistaken, it was ever so slightly rounder than it was before he arrived; with nine babies in there, he supposed that made sense. He couldnât feel any sensations of kicking yet, but it was probably too earlyâand honestly, he still kind of tingled all over. The analytical side of him wondered where they would be considered in their development relative to a human fetusâand if theyâd even show up on an ultrasound.
âHow are you doing, Captain?â Blue was still in front of him, but in the afterglow (literally) of the spell, heâd lost sense of anything else around him.
âIâm good,â he answered. âPossibly too good.â
Blue gave a small, knowing smile. âThat tends to happen. Come, letâs sit; you must have more questions.â She gestured toward the door the fairies had exited out of and then moved toward it herself, expecting him to follow.
Emma was suddenly at his side, and Belle not far behind. âYou okay?â she asked, brow furrowed in concern.
âI seem to be,â he replied. âHave I ever told you how bloody beautiful you are?â
She grinned, amused. âMany times. What was in that cup?â
âPotion of some sort,â he shrugged as she started pushing him in the direction of the door. âWhy?â
âSeemed like some really potent potables,â she quipped. Yeah, he did feel a little drunk.
He somehow ended up on a very plush couch, with Emma on one side and Belle on the other, sitting across from Blue, Tink, and Tiger Lily. Someone gave him a glass of water, and there was food on a coffee table, but he wasnât much hungry.Â
Honestly, he was mostly fascinated with the stained glass windows in the room, and with inspecting whatever was going on in his stomach, until he did hear Belle ask a pertinent question:
âSo why men?â
âWell, weâre all women,â Blue answered. âIt does take two.â
âBut I thought you said he was just a surrogate,â Emma countered. âAre these actually his babies? Because we didnât agree to that.â
âNo, theyâre not; I suppose in modern terms, youâd say that we reproduce asexually. But nature still seems to demand the involvement of a man and a woman. So thatâs why a willing male carries the brood.â
âAre there always so many?â Belle asked.
âNo; usually only 4 or 5. But no one was available at the last solstice.â
Killian didnât really pay attention to the next several questions regarding fairy reproductionâheâd read Belleâs notes later when he was a bit more focusedâbut he did eventually get to interject one of his own: âWhy are you big right now, though? And why arenât the babies going to be tiny?â
The fairies chuckledâhe supposed his statement wasnât as coherent as it sounded in his headâbut still replied. âShrinking is an acquired skill,â Tink said. âThatâs why we werenât small when we didnât have our powers,â she explained, nodding at Tiger Lily.Â
âBut once we learn, itâs our preferred size,â Blue added. âItâs easier to do our job then.â
That made sense.Â
âSo, what else can he expect,â Emma asked. âI know you said itâd be different, but how much?â
âWell, the size, obviouslyâand you will still gain weight to support that,â Blue explained. âIncreased appetite is to be expected, but no cravings or anything like that.â
âYour hormones will be altered, similar to a normal pregnancy,â Tiger Lily added. âBut that just helps the body prepare for birth.â
âBloody hell, what will that be like?â he wondered aloud.Â
âNowhere near as difficult,â Blue laughed.Â
âWaitâif my hormones are affectedâŚâ He trailed off, remembering how much those threw him for a loop last timeâparticularly, certain desires. âI can still have sex, right?â
Emma covered her face with her hands at his blunt question, but it was important.Â
âOf course,â Blue said plainly. âDo whatever you need toâwithin reason, of course.â
âAlthough, donât forgetâyouâll be at least twice as big as last time,â Tink reminded. âAt least. That might make it harder.â
More difficult, maybe, but it hadnât altered either personâs desires the last time around. He turned to give Emma (what he thought was) a salacious look, but she just burst into giggles.Â
âJustâlisten to your body,â Blue finally said. âFor everything: rest, food, activity. The spell you drank will last the whole pregnancy and keep things going. We trust you, though.â
âIâll guard them with my life,â he said, suddenly emotional, covering his stomach with his hand.Â
âAaaand thereâs the hormones,â Emma commented. âCome on; letâs get you home.â
He was suddenly very sleepy. âAye; thatâs a good idea.â
âYes, heâs going to be tired the next couple of days,â Blue added. âBut otherwiseâsee you in 40 weeks.â
Emma wrapped her arm around him, said goodbye, and poofed them straight back to their bedroom. He was nearly asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, but had one last thing to ask Emma.
âYouâll still find me sexy when Iâve got a big, huge belly, right?â
She kissed his forehead. âIncredibly so. Sleep tight.â
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thanks for reading! tagging @wyntereyezâââââââ @jennjenn615âââââââ @superadam54âââââââ @ashley-knightingaleâââââââ @justsomewhumpââââ @teamhookââ (let me know if you want a tag!)
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I am so excited to finally be posting this for yâall! Thank you so much for all the hype and support it is very much appreciated. :) this is my piece for @goldenbluesuitâ��s Christmas Fic Challenge! my prompt was the song âDo You Want to Build a Snowman?â from the movie Frozen and I hope you all enjoy how Iâve incorporated it into my Dad!Harry series. You donât necessarily have to read the other parts to understand this one, but Iâll link them below in case you want to re-visit them.Â
I Want Your Belly â Wonderful and Warm â Washed Away in YouÂ
Thank you to @tbslenthusiastâ and @heartbreakweatherharryâ for reading over this for me and giving me such amazing feedback!Â
Word count: 2.3k
You still couldnât believe the little wonder that had been created by you and Harry existed to be yours. Things hadnât been perfect, far from it, but it was definitely a new and fun adventure you were both eager and terrified of.
The first challenge presented was finding a name perfect enough to fit your son. He was alive for 24 hours before you discovered one you and Harry were absolutely sure of. Even seeing it written on his birth certificate made your heart swell with pride.
Itâs your mother who asks first, âWell, are you two gonna make a formal announcement to the press before us grandparents get to know the name of our grandson?â
âThink weâve made them wait long enough, Harry.â
He smiles at you from across the hospital room where he sits in a chair, the baby resting peacefully on his chest. Youâre propped up in the bed, wrapped in the soft pink robe given to you by him just a few days ago. Anne sits nearby, a proud grin on her face at the sight of her baby with his.
His eyes dart from the baby to you, âYou wanna tell them or shall I?â
âYou tell them. Youâre the one that found it, been bragging about it all day too.â
âAlright then,â He gently lifts the baby, turning him to where the whole room can see him, your sonâs face now scrunched up by the light from the window shining on him, âLadies, meet your grandson, Sterling Edward Styles.â
âOh, you didnât,â Anne giggles, reaching over to pat your leg, âYouâll never hear the end of it, love, letting him name the baby after himself.â
âHey! Sâher idea to give him my middle name. I picked the first,â His features switch from temporarily offended back to beaming, âWanna tell âem what it means, darlinâ?â
âSterling means âstarlingâ, or as Harry likes to call him..â
âOur little star.âÂ
5 weeks later, your son certainly lives up to his name, charming everyone he meets. Sweet smiles and coos at strangers from his carrier when youâre at the grocery store or falling asleep in Auntie Gemmaâs arms when she comes to visit. You were not surprised he already had his fatherâs charismatic ability to make everyone fall for him so quickly.
With Harryâs schedule as busy as it had been, it hadnât been easy to adjust to life together as new parents. As much as he had tried to push things back or reschedule to have more time off with you, there was only so much that he was in control of and he was away from you and Sterling more than he liked.
So itâs no surprise when he comes home one evening and the space you share is mostly already decorated for the winter holidays. He smiles warmly to himself when he hears you singing along to the movie playing from the tv, peeks around the corner to see Sterling tucked away in his swing, his eyes open and bright. Your back is turned so you donât hear Harry approaching, continuing to sing aloud as you work.
âWe only have each other, itâs just you and me, what are we gonna dooooooo?â You spin around, expecting to only see Sterling watching you, yelping when you find Harry, giggling at the shock on your face.
He bends to look out the window, âCould be wrong, but I think you have to have snow to build a snowman, yeah?â
âYouâre early! I wanted to surprise you,â You weave your way around boxes to greet him, âLeft the tree for the 3 of us to do together though.â
âSânice of you.â His hands remain in his pockets as you move closer, tired eyes looking down at you, lazy smile as you work your arms around his waist. He doesnât make you wait long, freeing his hands from his pockets to wrap around you.Â
He buries his face in your neck, âMissed you today.â
âWe missed you too, H.â
He pulls back, turning to look down at Sterling, his arm still holding you close to his side, âHeâs growing too fast. Canât believe heâs already 5 weeks.â
â5 weeks and 3 days,â You remind him, âAll the mommy blogs say we have an infant now.â
âSâthat sâpose to mean? âCourse heâs an infant.â
âJust means heâs growing out of his tiny baby stage.â
He directs his attention back to the movie playing, laughing as he teases you, âLeast yâcouldâve done is found a proper Christmas movie tâplay while you put up decorations.â
You shrug, âItâs close enough to count. Plus he LOVES it. Think Elsa might be his favorite.â
He canât resist anymore. As comfortable as his son may be swaying back and forth in his swing, he bends to scoop him up, one hand cradling behind his head and the other behind his back to easily support him. Sterling clearly doesnât mind, a grin developing when he realizes who it is disturbing him.
âDonât care what anyone says, bub. Yâll always be daddyâs baby.â
You never doubted Harryâs capacity to love his son, but you definitely questioned his expertise and knowledge of the basics of caring for a child. He had become somewhat experienced now, tackling late night diaper changes and early morning feedings or anything else in between without complaint when he could.Â
Though he had done great, you were never too far away that you couldnât offer assistance when he needed it. So when he gets a rare day off and suggests you let him stay home with the baby while you run errands, youâre hesitant. Â
âDo ya not trust me?â
âOf course I do. You know I do. I just donât want you to get overwhelmed.â
âSâjust for a few hours, right? You can write out a list of his schedule if it makes yâfeel better.â
Sterlingâs stretched across your lap, dozing off while you try to finish the last of your breakfast. Harry stands at the counter, drinking coffee out of a bright pink mug. You look between your almost sleeping son and then back up to Harry, chewing a bite of toast as you contemplate the idea.
He doesnât take offense to your hesitation, quite the opposite actually. He adores the sight of you, Sterlingâs face squished against your chest; one of his hands tucked under his chin, the other wrapped around your side, his little fist holding tight to your t-shirt. Itâs the purest form of love in his eyes, to see the bond between mother and son grow and deepen with each day. Makes him reminiscent of his connection with his own mother, fills his heart with so much joy knowing he had chosen someone that would give his son the same sweet upbringing he had.
He makes his way back around the counter to you, a hand resting on the top of Sterlingâs head as he bends down to kiss the top of yours. He moves his hand, repeating the act of affection to the top of the babyâs head.Â
âReally proud of you, yâknow that right, baby? Been so amazing watching you take care of yourself and our little boy, never doubted for a second you were meant for this, but itâs been more incredible than I couldâve ever imagined.â
âProud of you too, H. Know youâve had a lot of guilt about being gone, but Sterling and I love you so much. He already lights up at the sound of your voice when you FaceTime us from set, and I see the way he grins at you before he falls asleep when youâre here to tuck him in at night.âÂ
His eyes meet yours, sees the moment you make your decision to say yes, deep exhale of warm breath trapped between the two of you, âYou have to promise to call if anything happens, if you need anything at all. Donât care how small it is.â He nods firmly, further setting your mind at ease, âHe should sleep most of the time Iâm gone, but Iâll prepare another bottle just in case I canât get back in time.â
You feel silly for feeling so protective, and you were thankful to have Harry as your partner on this journey. His patience and support had been more than generous, covering you and Sterling in more love and adoration than youâd ever known could exist from one person. He kisses you again, on your lips this time, a hand cupping one side of your face before gently lifting Sterling from your arms, shushing and bouncing him a bit when he starts to whimper from the sudden change in his comfortable position.
âSâokay, bubs. Daddyâs got you, gânna have us a lilâ boys day while mummaâs gone.âÂ
You rush through whatever tasks you had scheduled that seemed so important that morning. Suddenly the groceries you needed and last minute presents you were dropping off at the post office to mail to out of town family didnât matter, nothing did but getting back home to your boys.
Itâs quiet when you shut the door behind you, almost too quiet. As much as you always prayed he would, Sterling never slept through his morning nap, so youâre surprised at the possibility of him still sleeping peacefully. Not that he was old enough to make too much noise yet, but still the silence worries you enough that you donât even take the time to put away the groceries. You set the bags on the kitchen counter, making your way through the house to the living room first.
All your concern fades at the sight of Harry on the couch, Sterling snuggled in his arms with his back pressed against Harryâs front, his little body covered in a red and white striped onesie with a reindeer on the front, matching pair of green socks on his tiny feet. Itâs such a comforting image, you once again question why you had any doubt at the thought of leaving the two of them alone. Harry hasnât noticed your presence yet, or if he has he hasnât said anything, and youâre content to keep it that way for a few more minutes to observe the vision set before you.
You notice the movie thatâs playing, itâs the same one from a few nights ago that Harry teased you for. You cross your arms, quirking one eyebrow upwards before you repeat Harryâs words from that night out loud, âBoys day, huh? Couldâve at least found a proper Christmas movie to watch while I was gone.â
âIâve decided youâre right, it does count. I can see why he loves it so much.â He looks up at you from where you lean over back of the couch now, a soft âhiâ falling from his lips, tilting his head up to accept the kiss you offer. Sterling coos, and when you look down, heâs looking up at you too.Â
âMommy missed you too, baby boy.â
âCome sit with us, lovie, watch the rest of the movie.â
âGimme a minute to put the groceries away and I will.â
âIâll pause it and come help.â
âNo, stay,â You run your hand through his hair, pushing the curls away from his face, âThereâs not that much, I got it.â
You work swiftly to put everything away, taking a minute to change back into your pajamas before you rejoin them, curling yourself against Harryâs side under his free arm. Sterlingâs dozing again, most likely falling into a milk coma from the bottle he had just finished, but it doesnât stop the two of you from continuing to watch the same movie together. You offer to take Sterling or put him in his swing, but he just shakes his head no, clinging tighter to him and you.
âSâmy favorite part, this song.â
âWhat? Itâs the saddest one. Elsa and Annaâs parents die in this one.âÂ
He shrugs, careful not to shuffle Sterling and disturb his sleep, âMaybe, but sâcatchy, gets stuck in my head more than the others.âÂ
He begins humming along to the intro music, nudging you softly to persuade you to start singing along with the character on the screen. You sit up, dramatically clearing your throat before you do. Harry knows more of the words than he cares to admit, but would rather hear the lyrics sung by you. He giggles at you as you even change your voice to mimic the silly parts.
âIt gets a little lonely. All these empty rooms. Just watching the hours tick byâŚâ
Harry provides the tick-tock part, clicking his tongue off-tune to the ones playing in the song. Thatâs enough to make you laugh out loud, temporarily forgetting the sleeping baby now resting on Harryâs chest. He shushes you playfully, his body shaking through his own laughter thankfully soothing Sterling enough that he doesnât wake up.
You compose yourself as the song turns slow and mournful, tucking yourself back to Harryâs side again. His hand works around to cup your waist, squeezing lightly to pull you closer, the vibrations of him humming along again a comforting rumble against your body. His voice is quiet, barely above a whisper as he sings the last notes of the song.
âWe only have each other. It's just you and me. What are we gonna doooooo?â
Your eyes scan the whole of the room. Your boys nestled together next to you, the tree in the corner of the room the 3 of you had decorated together a few days before, the pile of presents that had already accumulated underneath it. You spot your favorite ornament, a silver star with Sterlingâs full name engraved on the front, âBabyâs First Christmasâ etched on the back. Sterlingâs first present from your family sent from home. Well, what used to be your home for the holidays. A smile spreads across your face at the simple happiness and realization that this is your home now.Â
Harry, Sterling, and you; sun, moon, and star, spending your first holiday together.
 //
Thank you all for reading! As always likes/rbs/and comments are more than welcome. Tell me what you think here!
tag list: @taintedwonderâ, @cock-a-doodely-doo
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