#protect your assets
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castlestation · 1 year ago
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Fantasy Facts - Elven Puberty
Elves. Graceful. Elegant. Wise. These are all words we typically associate with this ageless race. But what of elven childhood? Elven senescence? Elven... puberty?We all know elves fuck, but few talk about how they grow up. In D&D, elves are suggested to reach adulthood at around 100 years of age. They may or may not reach physical adulthood at the same age as humans--it's unclear--but they are not treated as adults socially until that centennial mark.
Boring, to be honest. So let's imagine something better. Prepare for the nightmare that is
ELVEN PUBERTY
OR
THE FRENZY
Elves mature slowly, spending much longer at each stage of development than their human compatriots, ultimately reaching what we would call our 20s around 70 years old. The period before that is most commonly called, in various dialects with various lexical accoutrements, "The Frenzy." It is a surprisingly simple name for a people who prefer their names to be forty syllables long and in 🎶song🎶 form.
After reaching puberty somewhere around ages 30-40, elves go into heat for the first time, a nice side-effect to being attuned to nature's rhythms and cycles. Much as adolescent animals leave their parents before fully reaching adulthood, pubescent elves leave the confines of their emerald enclaves and mountain retreats to travel... and fornicate.
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The urge is nigh irresistible, with only a small percentage of elves able to choose to go through puberty in a traditional social setting. The rest are feral, sometimes forgetting even how to speak. They run with the beasts, fuck the beasts, and eat the beasts. This coming of age is full of terror and regret--just not for the youths.
The frenzy is made worse by the fact that elves continue to go through heat every century or so, resulting in mass births. When in heat, elven communities often engage in orgies and other kinds of group sex. These child booms result in groups of ferociously horny adolescents being unleashed upon the world. Messengers are sent out from elven communities to neighbouring peoples, warning of their spawns' coming (or cumming).
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The 40 year old virgins travel first to a forest glade or clear plateau, something that gives them view of the sky as well as having surrounding cover. They then fuck each other, sometimes for weeks on end. Elves can go without sleep for several months, and during the frenzy can go for years, followed by long hibernation periods lasting months to years themselves.
Once the youths have explored every aspect of each others' bodies, they search outwards, feasting on the land in more ways than one. Many believe that centaurs are actually the result of elven "teens" mating with wild horses and elk. Their urges are insatiable.
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Those fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to come across feral elves will first see a filthy yet beautiful person, often bruised and bleeding, with leaves and twigs caught in their silken hair, somehow still loose and shimmering despite being half covered in mud. They are rarely found wearing clothes.
They may ask to have sex, and for those who agree, the night is rich and fruitful, if exhausting--once they see their partner is unconscious or otherwise spent, they move on. Refusal can be problematic, as the elves are typically not in a mind to consider consent. However, much like the bears they likely fucked earlier in the day, it is possible to frighten off a pubescent elf by standing up taller, and opening ones coat to appear larger. Shouting, especially with clear, concise language, will cause them to feel that the situation is not particularly sexy. Some other clever ways to defuse feral elves includes playing chess, discussing politics, or asking how their day was.
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There is a darker side to the frenzy, as some elves form roving gangs that do not take "no" for an answer. These rotten youths are hunted by their parents. Once captured, they are punished with solitude in meditation chambers, surrounded by soft music, water, and flowers, visited only by elders and their parents, who recite ancient songs and poems about losing oneself. If the path to enlightenment fails to drown out their darker urges, they are disappeared by the commune. Few will tell what happens to them, but it is understood that their lives do not continue.
After a few decades of hunting, roving, and fucking, the primal heat ends, and the young elves return to their families of their own volition, sometimes travelling across oceans and continents to return from whence they came. They relearn manners and etiquette, and occasionally have to atone for what they have done while away.
While elves themselves cannot get pregnant during the first heat, they are capable of causing pregnancies, and half-elves birthed from the frenzy are known to be rowdier, rougher, and hornier than those from more relaxed unions.
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Tune in next time for more Fantasy Facts that are 100% real and definitely true.
Have a suggestion for what Fantasy Fact should be next? Let me know in the ask box or comments!
And remember, be Elf Aware! It could save your life (or at least your ass)
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Poster credit goes to my lovely partner @madicienne
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rmhashauthor · 4 months ago
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I am slowly coming to the conclusion that the industry where I work WILL be adopting AI whether I like it or not, so in the interest of keeping myself employed and employable I will probably have to learn how to use AI. Which means I will need to use the same framework of rules I already do when it comes to the laptop they gave me when I started this job:
Rule #1: Never ever ever EVER use your work machines for personal projects!!! I only check the news and weather on my company-issued machine and sometimes I browse Wikipedia.
Rule #2: NO work passwords should ever be similar to my personal ones - I will NOT be the one person who compromises my job because I decided my access PIN should be the same as my ATM, SSN or DOB.
Rule #3: I DO NOT open my work computer at home unless I've been asked to. That thing stays in the bag until I'm at my workstation for 2 reasons - the house router doesn't have the same security as my employer's network, and I like to keep my personal life and my work life so separate that I don't even make eye contact with my coworkers if I happen to meet them in public. At 4:30 everyone I work with is dead to me until 8 am tomorrow. I don't care if you gave me CPR at lunch, you do not exist to me outside the cubicle farm.
All this so I can keep as much AI off my personal computer and away from my writing as possible. I genuinely fear we've let the kitty out of the bag with this one, and the damn thing is already peeing on the duvet. There are merits to maintaining the boundaries between you and your company, between your home and your business, and between your brain and the world. That, and I'm old-school when it comes to keeping my business as my business. You CANNOT be too careful these days, kids. The scammers and doxxers are smart, you have to be smarter.
Why would I need plagiarism software to brainstorm ideas if I already have:
💻Daydreaming during work💻
💤Insomnia💤
✨The Shower✨
AND
Info-dumping my poor mom like
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lisamward · 1 year ago
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A will is a document that nominates an executor and provides instructions for how your estate should be distributed after your death. However, a will may not be enough to avoid probate or transfer property before you die. A trust & estates lawyer in Manhattan can explain other options such as trusts, powers of attorney, and living wills.
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gwyoi · 6 months ago
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I’m praying for women to stop having kids without a ring (specifically here in America because we don’t have common law in a lot of states 😭)
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goldenamaranthe-blog · 1 year ago
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Okay, now I'm intrigued to see where the Archery and Warlock AU goes.
I wonder when they really read the contract that they just agreed they realized they married or something besides making a typical Warlock pact.
Hmmmm.... Fey are known for being sneaky. Queen of the Fey Kali intervention, anyone? Also, forgive me for taking the shortcuts here with the names.
*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*
Archfey!Blake: (heavily pregnant, and sitting in a plush chair in a cottage tucked away in the middle of the forest as she embroiders a little emblem on a baby blanket)
Warlock!Yang: Hey, Babe! I'm going to run to town quick and pick up a few things. Do you need anything?
Blake: (shakes head) No, I'm good. Thank you though.
Yang: Alright, if you say so. I'll be back in a couple of hours.
Blake: Um, actually-!
Yang: I'll pickup two sweetrolls, three lavender dumplings, and see what the fish market has to make some salmon steaks tonight.
Blake: (blushes) You know me too well.
Yang: (exits the cottage)
Blake: (waits until the sound of footprints disappear and quickly pulls out the contract) What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What is going on?! (reads contract and finds a fine print)
Blake: (growls and blasts a summoning spell at another chair)
Queen of the Fey Kali: (appears in the chair while reading and sipping tea) Oh, hello, dear. How are you?
Blake: (holds up contract) What the seven hells is this?!
Kali: What? You were crushing over that human ever since she accidentally stepped in the Fey Circle two years ago! I just thought I'd help push things along!
Blake: Forcefully binding us in a contract is entrapment, Mom! I can't allow this contract to continue in good faith if it's influencing Yang's emotions!
Kali: Oh, dear, no! I wouldn't go that far. The spell just makes you two a married couple in the eyes of the Fey. Your emotions are your own. I assure you.
Blake: ......Oh......
Kali: (smirks) So, how's my little grandbaby doing?
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angorwhosebabyisthis · 10 months ago
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i want to go ahead and write up A Whole Thing about how ricky's arc ultimately comes down to 'protect what's yours,' in a way that tbh manages to be kind of the opposite of the toxic masculinity that trope tends to embody in western media especially. but also it relies on several other major essays about the themes in this show that i need to write up first to tie them all together with it. ashdjsjdjdh. Help
#SDMItag#ricky owens#i'll probably try writing it up for now and then see which things it does turn out i'll need to establish first#but the tl;dr is that ~protect what's yours like a man~ tropes are all about Defending Your Assets from Outside Forces with Violence(tm)#and ricky's 'protect what's yours' is about love as in loyalty as in setting down your stake Here#committing yourself to the wellbeing of whoever or whatever you've chosen; being a support for them to grow and be safe and be free#'yours' as in your family your community your work your activism the things you've built#instead of 'yours' meaning 'i have the right to destroy this and exploit it and throw it away as i please. it's there for me to take from'#it's 'i have a duty; and that duty is not synonymous with Violence; it can be feeding and healing the people you love'#'it can be putting your foot down and removing someone's access to a person or thing you've chosen when they're exploiting them/it'#'it can be *refusing* to do violence'#it's 'you chose me and you were supposed to love me and instead you treated me like a thing that exists for you to use and ruin'#'well i wasn't. i'm not. and i'm going to be what i needed you to be and you weren't'#'i refuse to hurt what's mine for my own gain because i can and i won't let you do it either'#it fucking kills me and it makes what pericles does to him and forces him to do in retaliation that much more fucking tragic#there's so much dude oh my god#kill me#professor pericles#dyn: when i die i want you to die too#abuse cw
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spidergirl-fibula · 9 months ago
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why did people celebrate mickey mouse entering the public domain and then turn around and act like using pokémon designs in some boring survival game is a crime against art
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scentedluminarysoul · 5 months ago
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Problem is, they're trained, yes. Trained to be warriors, predators. To see everyone as a threat. To live in a kill-or-be-killed world only. Look up "warrior training police"
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theabstruseone · 1 year ago
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I slept in and just woke up, so here's what I've been able to figure out while sipping coffee:
Twitter has officially rebranded to X just a day or two after the move was announced.
The official branding is that a tweet is now called "an X", for which there are too many jokes to make.
The official account is still @twitter because someone else owns @X and they didn't reclaim the username first.
The logo is 𝕏 which is the Unicode character Unicode U+1D54F so the logo cannot be copyrighted and it is highly likely that it cannot be protected as a trademark.
Outside the visual logo, the trademark for the use of the name "X" in social media is held by Meta/Facebook, while the trademark for "X" in finance/commerce is owned by Microsoft.
The rebranding has been stopped in Japan as the term "X Japan" is trademarked by the band X JAPAN.
Elon had workers taking down the "Twitter" name from the side of the building. He did not have any permits to do this. The building owner called the cops who stopped the crew midway through so the sign just says "er".
He still plans to call his streaming and media hosting branch of the company as "Xvideo". Nobody tell him.
This man wants you to give him control over all of your financial information.
Edit to add further developments:
Yes, this is all real. Check the notes and people have pictures. I understand the skepticism because it feels like a joke, but to the best of my knowledge, everything in the above is accurate.
Microsoft also owns the trademark on X for chatting and gaming because, y'know, X-box.
The logo came from a random podcaster who tweeted it at Musk.
The act of sending a tweet is now known as "Xeet". They even added a guide for how to Xeet.
The branding change is inconsistent. Some icons have changed, some have not, and the words "tweet" and "Twitter" are still all over the place on the site.
TweetDeck is currently unaffected and I hope it's because they forgot that it exists again. The complete negligence toward that tool and just leaving it the hell alone is the only thing that makes the site usable (and some of us are stuck on there for work).
This is likely because Musk was forced out of PayPal due to a failed credit line project and because he wanted to rename the site to "X-Paypal" and eventually just to "X".
This became a big deal behind the scenes as Musk paid over $1 million for the domain X.com and wanted to rebrand the company that already had the brand awareness people were using it as a verb to "pay online" (as in "I'll paypal you the money")
X.com is not currently owned by Musk. It is held by a domain registrar (I believe GoDaddy but I'm not entirely sure). Meaning as long as he's hung onto this idea of making X Corp a thing, he couldn't be arsed to pay the $15/year domain renewal.
Bloomberg estimates the rebranding wiped between $4 to $20 billion from the valuation of Twitter due to the loss of brand awareness.
The company was already worth less than half of the $44 billion Musk paid for it in the first place, meaning this may end up a worse deal than when Yahoo bought Tumblr.
One estimation (though this is with a grain of salt) said that Twitter is three months from defaulting on its loans taken out to buy the site. Those loans were secured with Tesla stock. Meaning the bank will seize that stock and, since it won't be enough to pay the debt (since it's worth around 50-75% of what it was at the time of the loan), they can start seizing personal assets of Elon Musk including the Twitter company itself and his interest in SpaceX.
Sesame Street's official accounts mocked the rebranding.
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tonguethulhu · 24 days ago
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Its weird how we believe so hard on freedom, we invade other countries to force freedom on them. Give them the liberty and rights to vote for the religious fanatic the military will put in charge that protects the federal reserves we installed immediate after annexation. We force other people to vote for a representative government, as an imperialist nation shouldnt that be... some sort of red flag about what we do at home?
They just call it freedom because it sounds good. Its called "lying to your face"
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nriwealth · 2 months ago
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Estate planning is an essential process, especially for NRIs who are looking to secure their wealth and ensure it is managed properly for future generations. In this video, we dive deep into the key aspects of estate planning, focusing on the unique challenges and opportunities that NRIs face. Let's talk about estate planning today and how it can impact your NRI wealth, whether you are considering the distribution of assets, tax planning, or ensuring that your investments are safe.
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did-we-imagine · 1 year ago
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Not a lawyer, but as a north african person, religious/conservative opinions aside, I feel that someone saying they don't want to marry their SO ever is a redflag. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Marriage normally secures both partners' rights esp the SAHMs...
However, I highly advise women NOT to put their careers on hold while men accumulate wealth and assets in GENERAL, and PARTICULARLY in my country/countries with similar laws, the assets aren't split evenly and while you can get some financial support, it will be meager (more commonly child support, alimony is not as easy to get, and many men will drive the wives to FILE for divorce to renounce their rights to financial support by them 🙂), AND you are only entitled to assets that you LEGALLY own (have boughy by yourself or the spouse declares that it is a shared property when acquiring it) though you may stay in the house (as long as the kids are minors, you aren't its owner), and btw, even this the men begrudge and resent lol. Obviously, cohabiting is not even an option here (illegal), but I guess in western countries it's definitely the less financially/socially beneficial variant of marriage. There is a reason why marriage is more secure than unmarried cohabiting in general.
I've seen women complain that their SOs refused to marry them even after having kids and spending 5 years+ together. I don't think that it's insane on these ladies' part to question their partners' intentions, despite their claiming that marriage is just a paper blah blah blah. If marriage really is just a meaningless piece of paper, then why don't you want to sign it? What is it going to change...? Imagine laboring emotionally and physically, enabling your other half to reach a certain level of material comfort and then being ditched with 0 claims to any of it.🤡
It's funny how those who wear rose tinted glasses will call me a cynical materialist or whatever, BUT it's the truth, and I'd fucking rather you know it right now rather than 20-30 years down the road as you get kicked out because the other person is leaving for a "younger/hotter" sugar babe OR they end up dying & their fam takes everything, leaving you in the dirt
My concluding 2 cts: if you are in a serious relationship that might result in marriage, consult a local lawyer to write a pre-nup, know your rights/duties, AND assume that the worst COULD happen, don't let the butterflies in your stomach tell you otherwise. People change. People can have bad intentions they HIDE until they get what they want. If someone refuses this and plays mindgames by questioning "your trust in them", run for the fucking hills because they are guilt tripping you lol. Being a SAHM long term is a very risky gamble IMO esp if the marriage laws don't guarantee you a minimum of the assets (just 20-30% is good, considering my country's law doesn't even do this) OR you aren't married, and even without assuming the worst of the breadwinning person, in the event of their death...How will you fare after 10+ years out of the job market, with very likely little qualifications or OLD ones?
this might be because I’m a family law lawyer and also an old crone who remembers when marriage equality wasn’t a thing (as in, marriage equality only became nation-wide two months before I went to law school), but I have Strong Feelings about the right to marry and all the legal benefits that come with it
like I’m all for living in sin until someone says they don’t want to get married because it’s ~too permanent~ and in the same breath start talking about having kids or buying a house with their significant other. then I turn into a 90-year-old passive-aggressive church grandma who keeps pointedly asking when the wedding is. “yes, a divorce is very sad and stressful, but so is BEING HOMELESS BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT ENTITLED TO EQUITABLE DISTRIBUTION OF MARITAL PROPERTY, CAROLINE!”
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terranatior · 2 months ago
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I had a really shitty day!!!!
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iinventorypro01123 · 7 months ago
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Protecting Your Assets The Role of Inventory Insurance Specialists
In the complex world of business operations, protecting assets and mitigating risks are paramount concerns for companies of all sizes. For businesses that rely heavily on inventory, ensuring adequate insurance coverage is essential to safeguard against potential losses due to theft, damage, or other unforeseen events. Inventory insurance specialists play a vital role in helping businesses navigate the complexities of inventory insurance, assess their coverage needs, and secure comprehensive policies tailored to their specific requirements. In this blog, we'll delve into the importance of inventory insurance specialists, explore the services they provide, and discuss strategies for businesses to protect their valuable assets through effective insurance coverage.
Understanding the Role of Inventory Insurance Specialists
Inventory insurance specialists are professionals who specialize in helping businesses assess, manage, and mitigate risks associated with their inventory assets. These specialists have in-depth knowledge of insurance products, policies, and regulations related to inventory coverage and work closely with businesses to identify potential risks, evaluate insurance options, and design customized insurance solutions that meet their unique needs and budgetary constraints.
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Key Responsibilities of Inventory Insurance Specialists
Inventory insurance specialists perform a variety of key responsibilities to ensure that businesses have adequate insurance coverage to protect their inventory assets. Some of their primary responsibilities include:
Risk Assessment: Inventory insurance specialists conduct thorough risk assessments to identify potential threats and vulnerabilities that could impact a business's inventory, such as theft, fire, natural disasters, or supply chain disruptions. By understanding the specific risks facing a business, specialists can recommend appropriate insurance solutions to mitigate these risks effectively.
Policy Evaluation: Inventory insurance specialists review existing insurance policies to assess coverage levels, exclusions, and limitations related to inventory assets. They identify gaps or deficiencies in coverage and recommend adjustments or enhancements to ensure that businesses have comprehensive protection for their inventory.
Insurance Placement: Based on their assessment of a business's risk profile and insurance needs, inventory insurance specialists help businesses select and purchase appropriate insurance policies from reputable insurance carriers. They negotiate policy terms, premiums, and coverage limits on behalf of their clients to secure the most favorable terms and conditions.
Claims Management: In the event of a loss or damage to inventory assets, inventory insurance specialists assist businesses with filing insurance claims and navigating the claims process. They work closely with insurance carriers to ensure that claims are processed promptly and fairly, and that businesses receive the maximum compensation to which they are entitled under their insurance policies.
Ongoing Support: Inventory insurance specialists provide ongoing support and guidance to businesses throughout the insurance lifecycle, including policy renewals, updates, and reviews. They stay abreast of changes in the insurance market and industry trends to ensure that businesses have access to the most up-to-date information and solutions to protect their inventory assets effectively.
Strategies for Businesses to Protect Their Inventory Assets
For businesses seeking to protect their inventory assets through effective insurance coverage, there are several strategies to consider:
Conduct a Comprehensive Risk Assessment: Begin by conducting a thorough risk assessment to identify potential threats and vulnerabilities that could impact your inventory assets. Consider factors such as the nature of your business, the types of inventory you carry, and the potential risks associated with your industry and geographic location.
Review Existing Insurance Policies: Review your existing insurance policies to assess coverage levels, exclusions, and limitations related to inventory assets. Identify any gaps or deficiencies in coverage and work with your inventory insurance specialist to address these gaps through adjustments or enhancements to your insurance policies.
Invest in Adequate Coverage: Invest in adequate insurance coverage to protect your inventory assets against a wide range of risks, including theft, damage, loss, and supply chain disruptions. Work with your inventory insurance specialist to tailor insurance solutions that meet your specific needs and provide comprehensive protection for your inventory assets.
Implement Risk Mitigation Measures: Implement risk mitigation measures to reduce the likelihood and severity of potential losses to your inventory assets. This may include implementing security measures such as surveillance cameras, access controls, and inventory tracking systems, as well as implementing disaster preparedness and business continuity plans to minimize the impact of unforeseen events.
Stay Informed and Proactive: Stay informed about changes in the insurance market, industry trends, and emerging risks that could impact your inventory assets. Work closely with your inventory insurance specialist to stay proactive in managing your insurance coverage, reviewing policies regularly, and making adjustments as needed to ensure that your inventory assets are adequately protected.
inventory insurance specialists play a critical role in helping businesses protect their valuable inventory assets through comprehensive insurance coverage. By conducting risk assessments, evaluating insurance options, and designing customized insurance solutions, inventory insurance specialists help businesses mitigate risks, minimize losses, and safeguard their inventory assets against unforeseen events. For businesses seeking to protect their inventory assets effectively, partnering with an experienced and knowledgeable inventory insurance specialist can provide invaluable support and guidance in navigating the complexities of inventory insurance and ensuring adequate protection for their most valuable assets.
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angele-midnight · 1 year ago
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No you also gotta pick up the Hot Topic Spiderpunk merch and then walk out the door with it stealing from multimillion dollar corporations is cool kids
(DIY is also sick tho)
put that hot topic spider punk merch down immediately and get out your diy supplies or i swear to god
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equalonline · 7 months ago
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EQUAL SecureX (LS-101) 30L Locker for Home, Black Finish (35x30x31cm, 30L)
The programmable electronic keypad and backup keys provide dual security protection. It's easy to install with four mounting holes, allowing you to install it on the wall, floor, shelf, or cabinet. It comes with pre-drilled mounting holes and hardware. The Equal Digital Safe Locker is the perfect solution for home, office, or hotel use and makes for an excellent gift.
Product details
Material & Color: This digital safe locker is made of a heavy-duty mild steel constructed body and 2 live-door bolts and pry-resistant concealed hinges for superior security, Color, Black
Size & Capacity: The size of the safe is 31H x 35W x 300 centimeters and comes with a detachable partition. Technical details - Net weight: 14.3 Kg, Volume: 30 liters
Dual Security Safe Protection: The Safe is operated via a digital keypad and a programmable electronic keypad ensures secure, easy operation; 2 backup keys for emergency use.
Idle for storing your electronic products, personal valuables, important documents letters files, jewelry, gold, passport, guns, etc. Perfect for birthday and anniversary gifts for your loved ones.
Assembly: Easy to set up with four mounting holes, this portable safe box can be installed on the wall, floor, shelf, cabinet, or anywhere you like, which perfectly protects your values. Includes pre-drilled mounting holes and hardware for floor and wall mounting.
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