#private clinic gynecologist

[newmicare]

How to Prioritize Mental Health During Pregnancy and Motherhood

Get practical tips to prioritize mental health during the holiday season. Learn how to manage stress, set boundaries, and maintain emotional well-being amidst the festivities. Source: https://newmicare.blogspot.com/2024/12/how-to-prioritize-mental-health-during.html

[asalescommunity]

Get rid of fallacies.

A delusion will make deluded, more and more.

A divorce is based on a law when an adult doesn`t want to live with the other adult in a same house, as well as doesn`t want to sleep in a same bed.

An abortion is against a law, and according to health and safety take anti-pregancy medications before having a sex.

A birth control is based on the anti-pregnancy medications.

A sex is health because the sex is not based on an act against health and safety, as long as the sex is not based on a rape.

A gynecologist can prescribe the medications based on a medicine.

According to health and safety, HRT can be proven to be an experiment against procedures based on a science because women have a progesteron in a hormonal system, while men have a testosteron.

Have a read about an economy.

by june bates

[eternity-hospital]

Eternity Hospital - Multi-Specialty Healthcare in Indirapuram, Ghaziabad

Eternity Hospital is a state-of-the-art healthcare facility in Indirapuram, Ghaziabad, offering comprehensive medical services. Led by experienced professionals, including Dr. Arvind Jain and Dr. Rashmi Jain, the hospital specializes in gynecology, plastic and cosmetic surgery, and other critical care services. Focused on patient well-being, Eternity Hospital is equipped with advanced technology to provide exceptional medical care around the clock.

For more information, visit Eternity Hospital.

[she-is-ovarit]

The intersection of male supremacy and white supremacy: Sperm donation corruption and rape by deception of women.

Jonathan Jacob Meijer.

(There is a Netflix documentary: Man with 1000 kids)

Several women went to this Norwegian man seeking a sperm donor. He had great hair. He had great teeth. He traveled and made Youtube blogs of everywhere he went, to all of these different countries. These women went through a private website as opposed to a clinic. He told these women that his intentions were to donate to a maximum of five families.

As they began getting pregnant and giving birth, some bumped into each other. And what a funny coincidence it was that they happened to share the same donor. And then more met and knew of each other. And some realized that their kids were in the same day camp together, and what were the odds of that?

And as it turns out, this man was operating under several different aliases and traveling internationally, donating to 11 different sperm banks under different names, providing sperm privately for women on the side. And he didn't just donate to five women, he donated to hundreds of women, many of whom connected with each other over social media and formed an online group where all were concerned with what he was doing. And this resulted in thousands of children directly related to this man internationally.

And he didn't just use his sperm, but would also meet up with his bald scarred friend and mix their sperm together in the sample bottle, so many of these women non-consensually conceived children with a man they had never even heard of without realizing it. And him and his buddy and other serial donors would "joke" that they were spreading their "white seed" when they would travel to places like Hong Kong and Kenya.

When he was finally tried in court he stated that if there was concern about incest, the children can all simply wear and use a social media symbol that brands them as his so they can recognize each other. And a female judge (who's name I cannot seem to find online) in a Dutch court, sentenced him to 100,000 euro fine for every time he donated if he was ever found donating again and required him to contact the donor banks and request his material be destroyed.

Donald Cline

(Also a Netflix documentary on this: Our Father)

A fertility (gynecology and obstetrics) doctor in the 1980s who welcomed women into his clinic before cryogenic freezing of sperm was a thing and it was freshly inseminated through a procedure. He let the women know that he was using the sperm of medical students and that there would be no more than three times sperm from the same student would be used. Some women, who weren't able to conceive with their husband for one reason or another, also came into the clinic wanting to use their own husband's sperm.

Years later a woman who grew up knowing that part of her DNA was from a sperm donor began wanting to connect with her potential siblings on 23&Me. She was shocked to discover at least 10 siblings she was related to. She got in touch with them.

It turns out that Dr. Cline proceeded to use his own sperm on the female patients, hiding somewhere in the clinic to produce it immediately before using it to inseminate unsuspecting women. This man covertly reproductively exploited several women and "fathered" 94 children. Whenever the children would try to meet with him, he would show up intentionally carrying a gun to intimidate them.

One of his biological daughters, who didn't realize Cline was her biological father until adulthood, even had him as her own gynecologist. He performed pap smears and breast exams on her. He knew that she was his biological offspring and she did not have the knowledge and therefore the option to decline being sexually examined by her biological father.

Dr. Cline was also tried in court by the victims; however, the judge was sympathetic to him.

____________________________________________________________

This form of sociopathy not only majorly creates significant consequences to the gene pool for our human species as these half siblings are at higher risk of incest, but the psychological harm done to the mothers and the children are horrific. Some of these (now adult) children have described an entire undoing of their self-identity, and many struggled in processing that the men who may have raised them was not their biological father. Some of these mothers are teaching their children to always ask whoever they date if they were ever conceived by a donor. These mothers now wrestle with conflicting emotions - the fact that they were betrayed, taken advantage of, and used to fulfill a man's god-complex, while also finally having a child or children that they love with all of their hearts who were a result of a violating situation.

These two men share two other things in common: they have both argued that they were "helping" these women. That these women came to them in need and that they were engaging in philanthropy and giving them what these women wanted. That they should be grateful.

And that they were interested in contributing to the white race. In addition to Meijer's comments in "spreading white seed", Jacoba, one of the child victims of fertility fraud/the reproductive rape of her mother by Donald Cline, described how he was using her mother as a pawn repeatedly to fulfill religious, male supremacist, and white supremacist ideals to spread the white race.

Now, look:

Presently there are little to no regulations or legal enforcement in preventing men from committing fertility fraud/this form of sexual violation and reproductive exploitation of women. There are little to no consequence for men substantially altering the genetic pool and using women as chattel and children as genetic products. In fact, Meijer was the first case in which a judge placed restrictions on male reproductive autonomy as a consequence for causing sexual, psychological, and evolutionary harm.

[artdcnaldson]

UGH ok twist my arm i guess!!!! as a little treat!!!! dr donaldson <3

so gynecologist art, yall, doctor donaldson. cat and i were in the dms TRUST. so art decides that he should probably have a backup plan, just in case tennis doesnt work out after college. he doesnt expect to actually need it because his tennis is going great, hes on track to go pro very soon. but JUST in case, he decides to use his good grades to study some kind of medicine. initially he had thought some kind of sports medicine, if nothing else then it would be good knowledge for himself down the line.

but after his grandma passes (not of a stroke) and he hears his family discussing how if only her gynecologist had paid better attention and taken her serious she might have lived longer (idk anything about medicine but probably some kind of cancer yknow?). anyway he sees that a his motivation and picks gynecology as his field. patrick absolutely teases him to death over it, "you're gonna be a pussy doctor? what so you just get to look at naked chicks all day? i'd quit tennis for that too". again he's not really expecting to need it, so he doesnt take it too hard. but he's kind of obviously the only guy in the course, and the girls all think he's kind of weird for wanting to pursue a field of medicine that isnt relevant to him. but after him telling the story about his grandmother they all coo and comfort him that its okey and they understand.

he does well in all his classes because he does truly find it interesting and wants to do his best to help women. but as he's getting ready to go pro, he has an accident on the court, as he's going to return a long ball he twists his ankle and takes a bad fall. his recovery is good, but his ankle will never be as it was before, and his chances of the big tennis dream slowly dies. and ultimately he's just unwilling to spend his life as a struggling tennis player, when he could be making a real difference.

now that he has his own practice he likes to tell that story to his new patients, especially the ones who seem tense with the fact that he's a man, who will be examining their most private area. it does well to ease their minds. hes been doing this for many years now, he enjoys the work, and the women who come to him are happy with his work. his patients are typically slightly older women, as they're not as phased by a male gynecologist, whereas most younger women arent as comfortable with the idea. he doesnt mind that, in fact he understands perfectly. honestly hes grateful for it, he fears the day he might have a patient whos just a bit too attractive and he'll have to struggle to keep his cool.

that day unfortunately comes sooner than he had hoped. its your first appointment with him after having him recommended by a friend, you had contacted him and told him how you were very unhappy with your current doctor and wanted to try something else. not having had a male doctor before, except like your dentist, youre very nervous for the appointment. not knowing what to expect from it, or how seriously he will take your issues. out of nervous habit youve gotten ready for the appointment as if it were a date rather than a clinical exam. showered, shaved, cute panties, hair and makeup done. its all totally unnecessary, but the moment you see him for the first time you thank the divine for looking your absolute best. GOD hes so hot. far too hot to be a doctor. lets just say that he wears scrubs because theyre so sexy, and they truly are criminally flattering on him. he sits on his chair, typing away as youre lead into the room by an assistant. as soon as he looks up and asks you to have a seat with him, you both know youre screwed. the tension is immediately noticeable as you discuss your reason for coming in, just a routine check because your last doctor wouldnt do it thorough enough and didnt listen enough to your issues.

he leaves the room while you strip off and leave your clothes in a neat little pile, panties clearly on top in the hope that he'll see them and think theyre cute. and he does, in fact his eyes keep fluttering to them as hes getting ready for the exam. he has to adjust his chair a little lower in the hopes that you cant see that he's getting hard. meanwhile youre going from soaking to sopping wet as you watch him put on the latex gloves, snapping them against his wrist.

he can tell that you're tense, but as its your first appointment with a male gynecologist, he assumes thats the reason, and not the fact that youre mortifyingly wet. he tries to calm your nerves by telling you what he'll be doing, he sits right in front of you on his chair and tells you how first he'll examine externally, just checking for anything irregular. then an internal exam with the same purpose, and then finally a physical exam where he will just have to feel your tummy as well as your pelvis to ensure everything is as it should be. totally routine stuff, nothing out of the ordinary, if anything hes far more attentive and careful to make sure youre comfortable. but the way hes saying it, his voice and the way he's looking at you has you clenching your thighs shut and trying to keep yourself from making a puddle on the table.

as he gathers his tools he asks you to place your legs in the stirrups, he sees you struggling a little to get your right leg properly in place, he gently grabs your leg and helps you place it properly. goosebumps cover you leg as he pulls his hand away again. you can feel how wet you are as youre not totally exposed to him, dripping wet, youve been less wet when hooking up with people. this is just from interacting with him briefly, really its embarrassing. hes so sweet asking if everythings alright, and if he can do anything to help you relax. and after squeezing your eyes shut and holding your breath for a second you finally get out that you just feel like youre really wet, and youre not youre not sure why, this doesnt usually happen. hes so sweet, trying to reassure you, telling you its perfectly normal. its a natural response from your body, if anything its a sign that youre healthy!

hes not lying, he really does mean what hes saying, it is good and it is normal. but hes never seen anyone be quite this wet during an appointment in his office. youre soaked, its practically dripping onto the table and forming a puddle. if he was sporting a semi under the table he might have referred you to a different doctor. but youre so pretty he cant help himself.

he really does try his best to stay professional and not let his attraction crack through and distract from his work. but fuck youre so tight around his latex covered fingers when hes doing the exam. and you only squeeze down tighter when he tries to reassure you, tell you youre doing good. its making it hard for him to focus on the task at hand. it takes everything in him to keep his hands from drifting and moving to find those sweet spots inside of you. he doesnt have to deprive himself for long tho as he accidentally brushed against your gspot. his cheeks turn bright pink as he hears a tiny moan escape your lips. and youd been so good at keeping them in the whole time too. but this one couldnt be contained. he stays good, doesnt say anything, just carries on with his work. but he almost lets out a moan of his own as he sees the ring of cream gathered around his gloved fingers.

he takes his work very seriously and he doesnt take the idea of losing his medical license due to malpractice lightly, so he wouldnt be just giving in to his urges. his resolve breaking doent come lightly, its a big deal to him. he goes home that day and jerks off in the shower while thinking about you, he knows exactly what your pussy looks like, what it feels like, how soaking wet you got for him. he cums again in his bed and humps his mattress while dreaming about you. he wakes up and decided he needs to see you again. asks his assistant to set up another appointment with you. when he asks what for, he stutters and says something about needing to do some tests just to be sure of something. hes lying, obviously, but he needs to see you again. he cant stop thinking about your tight little cunt...

-🐞

ladybug your mind amazes me... <3

He can't risk medical malpractice, and he really is a good doctor, he loves his work, he wants to help people. And he's really never, ever reacted this way to a patient before, but god, he can't get you out of his mind.

So maybe he schedules a follow up for a week later. Maybe his heart is racing and his palms sweat when he walks into the examination room and sees you in the little fabric gown, hands in your lap, worrying your lip between your teeth.

He feels like a nervous teenager on a first date, not a fucking healthcare professional.

He listens to you speak about your concerns, walks through your test results from the week prior. Everything looks good, he says. Nothing felt abnormal, your body is working just how it's supposed to. Do you have any questions for me?

You shake your head, sweet and shy, aching for an excuse to get his hands on you again, but running low on things you can ask for.

[vigolicious]

jang wonyoung x gynecologist g!p reader

wonyoung pov:

i am now in the clinic for a check-up for my vagina, mom said i should check it to see if something is wrong, so i scheduled an appointment with dr. (l/n).

while i was waiting, a nurse called my name and said that dr. (l/n) is waiting for me at her office. i stood up nervously because it was my first time and nobody has seen my private parts except my mom when i was little but enough about that, so i got to the office.

and dr. (l/n) is there sitting and writing something on her clipboard, she was handsome but at the same time beautiful and she looks to be in her mid 30's, kinda young for a doctor but i guess she was super smart to graduate young in the medical field.

she looked up and she saw me and smiled charmingly at me. "ah you must be jang wonyoung, have a seat" she said have while pointing in the chair for me to seat. "so i read in your medical records that this is your first time?" she asked me, and i said yes. "don't worry i'll be gentle" she said jokingly and softly laughed and also laughed to because there was nothing wrong in her little joke.

"so let's begin, i'll question you some things about your health, so please answer truthfully" she said and then questioned about my body and i answered them. "miss jang, thank you for answering my questions and let's begin the check-up, can you please remove your clothes especially your undergarments over there in the changing room" she said profesionally, and i followed her orders.

once i was fully naked, i stepped outside the changing room and then dr. (l/n) orders me to lie down on a bed with stir-ups and they're's a curtain than can block my view from dr. (l/n), and then she spread my legs apart and put it in the stir-ups, i shivered because it was cold in the office but thank god i shaved.

reader pov

i sanitized my hands first and then put on some gloves, i then gently touched her pussy and probed at the sides to see if some thing is wrong, once i was sure there was nothing wrong, i pulled her pussy lips apart to see if her hymen is there, and there it is. "miss jang are you a virgin?" i asked her, "yes i am, is their a problem doctor?" she answered but at the same time she questions. "no there is no problem miss jang, but it will hurt a little bit to look inside, i'll put some lubricant" i said to calm her down.

i picked up the lube but it was empty, 'huh? i was sure that i bought some and i can't hurt miss jang, sigh i think it's for the best' so pulled her closer to me and then slowly licked her pussy, she flinched, 'god she taste so good' and then i continued to lick her pussy, i pulled her pussy lips apart and then licked her virgin hole and then i teased her clit with my thumb, "moan?!" she moaned surprised, "doctor what are you doing?" she asked, "im just putting on lubricant for you miss jang" i answered and then continued to eat her pussy.

i reluctantly stopped licking her pussy and massaged it "miss jang i will now be entering your vagina to see whats inside" i said, "o-ok doctor" she answered, i then put my finger inside her pussy slowly and to not make her in pain i teased her clit with my thumb "moan?! doctor it hurts" she sobbed, "shhhh it's ok the pain will go away just trust me" i said and then i licked her clit to pleasure her, she moaned the whole time.

i then put my second finger in and then she flinched, pushing her pussy on my mouth but i don't mind because i was hard and finger fucked her slowly, she moaned louder this time, good thing my office is soundproof and i locked the door while she was changing to make sure no one disturbs us. i pulled my fingers away to see the hole but it was no good it was still small, "miss jang, it's still small i think we should use a bigger tool to make the whole bigger, you won't mind miss jang?" i said and questioned her, "it's ok doctor but please be gentle" she pleaded, "don't you worry miss jang" and then i stood up and unbottoned my slacks and then pushed my slacks downward to let my shaft free, i sighed mutely and then pulled miss jang even closer to me.

i positioned myself in between her thighs and i tapped my cock in her pussy twice, the sound was so loud she flinched, i grind my cock in her wet pussy to lubricated myself, she continuosly moaned and twitched. "miss jang this will hurt so hold my hand please" i ordered, i put my hand in her stomach and she held it like it was her lifeline. i then hold my cock and teased her clit with my head to make her wet more, why she was not suspiscuois about what i'm doing to her, i don't know but i i'm not complaining.

i then positioned my cock head in her hole and then gently pushed forward, i only made my head on her pussy inside but she was screaming for me to stop, so i did. "s-top it h-hurts s-so bad" she sobbed while holding my hand still. "i know miss jang but it's the only way" i said, she was silent while i rubbed her stomach to calm her down, "i'll continue" i declared and then i pulled away and then gently pushed, 'god i want to pushed it all the way but patience' and i slowly fucked her with my tip.

she soflty moaned 'she's so tight fuck', i pushed another inch in her and fucked her gently. i rubbed her clit to distract her from the pain, and then another inch, and then another, until i hit a barrier, she screamed painfully, "miss jang, i have to break this barrier to continue the check-up so please bear with me" i said and then i pulled away and then pushed my shaft all the way in, 'fuck yes' "fuck" i moaned, "*screams* w-hy d-did y-o-ou do th-that" she sobbed. "shhh it's part of the procedure, the pain will go away and will be replaced with pleasure" i concoled her.

i stood still to let her adjust my size for five minutes, she still held my hand, knowing that i caused her pain, 'so cute' i smiled adoringly while watching our conjoined hands and then our conjoined sexes, i moaned at the sight. i then pulled my cock all the way and pushed my cock back in her heat, she sobbed while i gently fucked her "shit" i moaned and then fucked her little faster now, "*moans*" she moans loudly, i put both hands on her waist and then pistoned away, i noticed that her hand is still holding my hand, and i can't help myself anymore 'fuck it'.

i removed the curtains while still fucking her and oh god her face is so cute shit, i hugged her then kissed her, she wrapped her arms around my neck and then kissed her jaw and her neck while she is still moaning "you're so cute miss jang, fuck," i said to her, "d-d-octor it fe-e-els s-s-o-o g-ood, y-e-ah r-right there" she screamed and i continued to fuck that spot for her. for about 6 minutes i fucked her pussy and then "doctor i-im cumming" she said, "yeah cum on my cock miss jang" i said continuining to fuck her.

she screamed while creaming on my dick, i continued to piston in her pussy without stopping because i was going to cum, "miss jang i'm cummming" i said, "no cum insid-e p-please" she pleaded but i didn't listen, "here it comes" and i planted my seed inside her fertile womb, i stood still while cumming ropes of cum in her pussy while she moans loudly, her arms still around my neck and i kissed her while gently fuck her.

i pulled my shaft away and i let my cum drip down her pussy, i hold my cock and scoop the cum with my cock and then pushed it all back in, she moaned, but now she was laying in the bed, we were gasping for air and the room was filled with the sounds of our breathing, she was cockmarming me now. i grabbed the clipboard in the table and then wrote something in it while still inside and i gave it to miss jang, "call me for a private check-up if there is something wrong in your pussy" and thrust once, motioning her pussy filled with my cum.

i pulled away and grabbed some tissue to clean her up and dress her back in her clothes but without kissing her pussy first and giving it a lick. "here miss jang, a plan b you don't want to be pregnant while your still young". i joked and then kissed her again while grabbing her ass and she wrapped her arms around my neck and tiptoed to reach my height, i was tall 6'7 and it makes her look so cute and fuckable in my eyes. "don't worry doctor, i"ll call you soon" she said while grabbing my clothed dick while kissing me again, "well, i'll wait for you miss jang" i said and smacked her ass and groped it, she giggled, and she's out of the door.

authors note: i finished this 12:05 am so hope you enjoy<3.

[dfortrafalgar]

I'm Losing You

Having a family isn't always as easy as fairy tales make it seem.

Warnings: Read chapter 1 for warnings.

Additionally, I've been getting a lot of (understandable) messages concerned about the wellbeing of our lovely reader and Law, so I made a helpful little graph just to document the overall progression of the story and where you are so far as of this chapter :)

Do with this what you will <3

Taglist: @phsycochan | @mirillua | @augustanna | @chaixsherlock

Chapter 8

[Prev] [Next]

Law’s entire world was curled up on a hospital bed, an IV fluid drip in her hand and her eyes closed tightly shut, afraid that if they opened they’d have to relive the reality of the situation all over again.

You had continued bleeding throughout the car ride to the hospital, rendering the impromptu toilet paper pad completely ineffective.  Both what was left of that and your underwear were placed in a biohazard container, and you were placed in a fresh pair of hospital garments with a maxi pad that really operated similar to a diaper.  The bleeding also made you incredibly weak and lightheaded, leaving Law to sprint into the emergency room, grab a wheelchair, and bring you inside that way.

When he woke up this morning, he never would’ve guessed he would be seeing you in a hospital bed in the small emergency patient room.  You had showered and eaten breakfast, kissed him and pet Bepo.  Now you were actively expelling what was most definitely a miscarriage.

A gentle knock resounded outside the shut door.  You didn��t even move in reaction, staying inhumanly still with your eyes closed.  The door opened regardless however, and Law was met with the friendly, yet somber, face of your gynecologist.  Robin entered the room with a clipboard in her hand.  Law recognized her instantly, not as his wife’s gynecologist, but as a former classmate in medical school.  He never thought that she’d be the one taking care of this entire situation, and part of him was regretful that she had to see this side of him.

“Small world, huh?” Law asked, though his voice lacked any enthusiasm.

“Indeed it is, I was just reading the latest paper you published.  I was wondering how you were doing after residency,” the woman responded.

Law huffed with a minimal bounce of his shoulders.  “You could probably guess how I’m doing.  But, thank you for taking the time to drive here from downtown.”

“Of course, it was oddly good timing.  I have no patients at the clinic for the rest of the day.”  Robin’s lips pursed all of a sudden however, as she got down to business.  “I would like to talk to you privately, if that’s alright with you.”

The man’s eyes narrowed in concern.  “Why privately?”

Her voice lowered to a whisper.  “I’m not sure your wife is in a stable emotional state to hear what I have to say.”

With the way you hadn’t moved since you arrived, your IV drip slowly administering your fluids and a clip on your finger monitoring your pulse and oxygen levels, Law was starting to wonder if you had stressed yourself into a deep sleep.  He didn’t want to wake you to find out.  Instead, he quietly followed Robin out into the hallway, asking a nurse at the front desk to monitor your room for him.  He followed his former colleague into a small meeting room, where she shut the door behind the two of them for complete privacy.

“Law, I know you can handle the more… gritty side of things, so I’m going to be completely blunt with you,” she began, covering her clipboard of papers with her hands.  “I’m sure you’re already very aware, but your wife is currently undergoing an eight week miscarriage.  Her follow-up appointment from last week was supposed to be in two days, but clearly, we were correct in the possibility that she was seven weeks along when we couldn’t detect a heartbeat.”  It was then that she moved her hands, shuffling through the papers in her clipboard before producing a copy of your patient assessment and a small, enclosed envelope.  “Before I begin, I would like to ask you a few questions.  I was informed that you had blood work and a semen analysis done to confirm your fertility, correct?”

The non-professional side of Law felt slightly uncomfortable discussing the results of his semen analysis with his former residency colleague, but he knew this was crucial information.  He nodded, folding his tattooed hands above the table.  “Yes I did.  My hormone panel from the blood test came back completely normal without any anomalies, and the semen analysis showed a completely normal sperm count.”

Robin nodded, opening the envelope as she listened to him speak.  “Understood, so it’s safe to say you are fertile.”

“I would assume so,” he confirmed.

The black-haired woman produced a small set of photographs from the envelope.  “With that confirmed for me, I would like to show you these photos from your wife’s ultrasound last week.”  She laid out the small assortment of photographs, but held one down with her hand and used her pen to point out the barely-identifiable contents of the image.  (Which Law was grateful for, as he admittedly had no idea what he was looking at.  His brief rotation in gynecology did very little to cement the process of a uterine ultrasound.)

“This large black space is the amniotic fluid surrounding the embryo,” she described, moving the capped end of her pen around the space.  “This white blotch here is the embryo at around six weeks gestation, which I theorize is when it ceased development.  As you can see, it’s still attached to the wall of her uterus.”  Two taps of the pen against the image punctuated her statement.  “This area surrounding the amniotic fluid is the uterine tissue.”  Robin looked up at Law.  “Understood?”

It took a brief moment, but Law finally nodded his head.  “Yes.”

Silently, she moved the first image out of the way and replaced it with another one.  “Now I would like to draw your attention to this one.”

Law leaned forward in his seat, assessing the new image.  It looked completely different than the first, and he quietly waited for Robin to begin to describe what exactly he was supposed to be focusing on.

“This was taken at the beginning of the ultrasound.  My technician placed the transmitter on the left side of her abdomen before moving it toward the approximate location of the uterus to detect the fetus.  We were able to see a glimpse of her left ovary during this time.”  Once again, the pen tapped a specific area of the image.

Law’s heart rate increased.  “Please don’t tell me what I think you’re about to tell me.”

Robin shook her head.  “Not cancer,” she confirmed.  “However, do you see this patch of tissue right here?”  She circled the area.

He didn’t, really, but he nodded his head to urge her to continue.  

“It can’t be confirmed without surgery, but I have a strong suspicion that this is endometrial tissue.  I reviewed some of her patient notes and recalled certain appointments where she would inform me of abnormally heavy periods, but she never mentioned anything more specific, such as intense pain during menstruation, so it never seemed to affect her life outside of that.  But looking at her ultrasound images, I’m highly suspicious that she may have endometriosis, which can greatly negatively impact fertility.”

Law clenched his jaw.  “What kind of surgery is done to diagnose that?”

“We would confirm the diagnosis with a laparoscopy.  A small cut is made in the naval, and a thin instrument, similar to a camera, is inserted into the incision to scope out potential endometrial tissue.  In many circumstances, a similar laparoscopic method is used to surgically remove this endometrial tissue, however we would need a definitive diagnosis in order to perform this with confidence.”  Robin was stone-faced as she explained.

Law had a million questions racing through his mind.  He wished he could sit and ask all of them, but the most pressing one forced its way out of his mouth first.  “Will she ever be able to have children?”

“After a successful recovery from this miscarriage, and a successful recovery from laparoscopic surgery to remove endometrial tissue, if that is the case, then yes, her chances of becoming pregnant will remain.  However, women who experience at least one miscarriage have a higher likelihood of experiencing more, so you must take this into account if you decide to try for conception again.”

He nodded.  “I understand.”

Robin collected her paperwork, reviewing your patient chart once more.  “Other than the potential for endometriosis, her physical health is perfect.  There would be no other reason to me why she wouldn’t be able to have children, other than this one big issue.”

Law stayed silent as she explained.  He stood up as she did and followed her to the door, blindly keeping pace behind her as he was led back to your room.  The door was pushed open slowly so as to not potentially disturb you.  The nurse from prior stood from her seat, entering the hallway and quietly whispering to Law.

“She fell asleep, her vitals are good, however she should remain on fluids for a while longer.  Her blood pressure was lower than normal and her iron levels were reduced,” explained the nurse, who’s own eyes were creased with a sympathetic concern.

Law gave a curt nod.  “Thank you very much for staying there.”

“Of course, it’s my pleasure.  Come back to our desk if you need anything,” she replied before leaving to continue her work.

Robin held her clipboard under her arm.  “I’m going to return to my office and write a referral for a diagnostic laparoscopy, but I won’t make the official call until she gives me her full permission.  Does that sound good?”

Law nodded, rendered completely mute.

“Call my clinic if you need anything at all.  Tell them who you are, and I’ll make sure your calls get sent right to me.”  Robin was about to turn on her heel, but she looked back once more at the forlorn man.  “I don’t usually do that for my patients, but I know you, Law.  I know how genuine you are.  I can see how much you love your wife and how the both of you are eager for a successful pregnancy.  I want to do everything in my power to help you achieve that.”

Law inhaled a shuddering breath.  “Thank you, Robin, I… I appreciate that.”

She nodded her head, finally turning and pacing down the hallway.  Law entered your room once more and closed the door behind him.  He stood at the foot of your bed, following the hose from the IV bag down to where it was connected into the skin of your hand, taped in place to prevent its movement.  Your face was tucked into your arms, shielding your grief from the world.  The pulse monitor was moved from your index finger to your middle finger, constantly giving readings of your blood oxygen and iron count.

Law took his seat again, resting his elbows on his knees and dropping his head into his hands.  He only picked his head up to look at the digital clock on the wall.  It was already almost 5:00 PM.  He shoved his hand in his pants pocket and took out his phone, opening his text messages.

Hey, Shachi, can you or Penguin go to my apartment and feed Bepo?  If you could take him for a walk, too, that’d be really appreciated.

It didn’t take long for his phone to buzz with a response.

Dumb Orca

Yea of course. everything good????

Law sighed.

I’ll explain everything later, but we won’t be home for a little while.

Dumb Orca

Ight, bet. hope youre good

Law did really not want to explain the events of the day over text.  He placed his phone back in his pocket before eyeing your bag that was laying against the leg of his chair.  He reached down and fumbled quietly for your own phone, lifting it from your bag and illuminating your screen.  He input your passcode and glanced through your own texts.

Ika-chan

Hey girlie is everything alright???  Law came in to grab your bag

Ika-chan

Text me back as soon as you get this, i’m really worried!!!!!

Ika-chan

I love you boo xoxo

Nami Swan

Hey babes u left ur lunch in the kitchen fridge

Nami Swan

Where did u go???

Nami Swan

I’ll protect ur tupperware for 2day, but if u dont come back by 5 im letting usopp eat ur lunch

Nami Swan

U know how sanji feels abt wasting food

God Usopp

Hey can i have ur lunch

Boss-y

(2 Missed Calls)

Boss-y

(1 Voicemail)

Boss-y

Hey, your husband came in and picked up your bag.  He informed reception that he was taking you home, I hope everything’s alright.  Please call me back when you can, just so I know you’re alright.  If you need some time off, just feel free to let me know that as well so we can work around the project.  Don’t stress yourself out about coming back in too quickly, if something happened I want you to recover first and foremost.  Best wishes.

Law pressed the button on the side of your phone to set it to sleep mode before slipping it back into your bag.  He leaned back in his chair and stared blankly at your backside, curled away from him.

[illmasc]

Hi hello. Totally legit scientist here. I’m doing a private study to see if tdick can get another trans guy pregnant. You seem to be a good test subject.

I’ll try different positions, different toys, tools, engage different specific kinks, etc. I estimate it’ll take about a week and you’ll have to stay in my “lab” full time. You’ll be given an IV of nutrients so we won’t even have to stop to eat You’ll be restrained of course, I anticipate you might get a bit resistant once the real overstimulation sets in.

If you’re not pregnant after it’s over, we’ll just have to try again with new methods. I’m sure you’ll get knocked up eventually.

i’ll wake up blinking in the bright overhead lights, already restrained. I don’t remember how I got here, but one thing is for certain—i’m completely naked on this table, covered in that shitty paper they have at the doctor’s office. my legs are in stirrups.

something’s coming back to me—I came into this trans-friendly clinic that promised free birth control services. i’ve never been good at regularly taking the pill, so I jumped at the chance to try out the test trial, advertised as ‘no stress! have all the sex you want!’

Vulgar, sure, but as a broke, disorganized college student, it was too good to pass up.

I figured it would be a little questionable, so i shake off any feelings of doubt. I’ll ask when it starts, to which you’ll just smile and rub at my thigh with your cold, latex-gloved hand. You press into my hole without warning, rubbing my insides until they respond against my will. This isn’t what they usually do at the gynecologist, but I’ve never gotten an IUD before—maybe this is all standard. Still, I’m starting to get nervous. It feels good, but…

“Will it hurt?” I’ll ask you, “The IUD. I’ve heard it—“

“You’re not getting an IUD today,” you’ll explain as you continue to work your fingers on me. Opening me up. “Don’t you remember? You signed on to join our test trial.”

I didn’t read any of the papers I signed at the intake. I just figured it would be an IUD…or Nexplanon, but they don’t put those in your…

You’re still touching me. You’re basically fingering me. worse—I’m struggling not to cum. Already. I might be a touchstarved little slut, but even this is a record for me.

Passing out, waking up nude, with my body reacting this way…it all puts a sour taste in my mouth. My mind feels like it’s turning to sludge as you tease my cervix.

“What did you…did you…drug me? What is this?”

You ignore my questions, and keep prepping me with your fingers. I wince in pleasure as your thumb finds my perky, aching tdick. “We’re going to start out vanilla, but don’t worry. If it doesn’t take, I have plenty of…aid.”

I only notice that your pants are down around your knees when you bring your hips flush with my entrance. I feel your tdick brush against me, replacing the void your fingers left. You smile at me, and I know what’s about to happen.

“If…sorry, when it works, you won’t have to worry about birth control. At least, not for nine months.”

[mallloryrowinski]

"conscientious objectors to abortion" aka "fuck your rights to your own body" in Italy

In Italy, Poland, Spain, and Argentina (as far as I'm aware) abortion is legal BUT medical practitioners have the "right" to refuse to perform abortions based on their personal ethical/religious beliefs.

Aside from the obvious fact that this shouldn't even be a thing - just like any other doctor who's not a gynecologist shouldn't be able to refuse to provide medical care because they "believe it's wrong" (why the fuck are you even a doctor then) - this has resulted in massive issues for women seeking an abortion.

In Italy specifically, in 2021 (last available numbers) 64.6% of all Italian gynecologists refuse to perform abortions.

Something everyone LOVES to omit in this discussion, is that 60% of all Italian gynecologists are men. Although we don't have exact numbers on how many of the "conscientious objectors to abortion" are male, we DO know for a fact that out of all the Italian gynecologists, men are more likely to choose not to perform abortions.

Additional information you need to contextualize all of this: in Italy, the process for obtaining an abortion is regulated by Law 194/1978, which legalized abortion under specific conditions:

The woman seeking an abortion must consult with a doctor (a family doctor, a gynecologist, or a doctor at a public health facility)

The request must be made within the first 90 days of pregnancy (approximately 12 weeks).

The doctor will assess the pregnancy and the woman's health. If the woman is less than 90 days pregnant, she is eligible for an abortion.

If the woman decides to proceed, the doctor issues a certificate confirming the request for an abortion.

After the certificate is issued, there is a mandatory 7-day waiting period

After the 7-day waiting period, the woman can access the procedure at a public hospital (free) or an authorized private clinic (500 to 2000 euros).

Here's the kicker: if, for whatever reason, you cannot afford to spend 500 to 2000 euros (the average monthly salary for a WOMAN in Italy - after tax -is between 1300 to 1600 euros), or there are no private clinics in your area, you have no choice but to go to a public hospital. But, as we've established before, 64.6% of gynecologists will NOT, under any circumstance, perform an abortion. This means that hospitals must balance available non-objecting doctors and staff, which often means that abortion services are offered on specific days or during limited hours, rather than every day. This creates long waiting lists. Remember, you can only abort until the 90th day of pregnancy, and on average women find out they're pregnant when they're 4 to 6 weeks along (28th to 42nd day), you also have to get a certificate (and let's say you're incredibly lucky and get one the day you find out you're pregnant), then wait 7 days (you're now 5 to 7 weeks along, day 35 - 49 of your pregnancy) and only then you can actually get an abortion, but na-ha! you have to wait! You've gotta wait cause doctors literally will not perform the medical care you need! The clock's ticking!

It is estimated that ALL Italian public hospitals perform between 3850 to 4400 abortions a month, but let's say there are 4000 monthly abortions on average. There's a total of about 1000 public hospitals in all of Italy. This means that each public hospital only performs about 4 abortions per month!

This is horrific. Abortion is any woman's right. It should be easily available and accessible, for any reason, at any time, not a hellish 5-to-god-knows-how-many-more weeks experience.

There is no such thing as a "right" to refuse a needed medical procedure as a goddamn doctor! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!!

By acknowledging a (more often than not) man's "right" to refuse to perform abortions, we're infringing upon actual women's rights!

Also - kick all men out of gynecology!

[cartermagazine]

Today We Honor Dr.Josephine English

Dr. Josephine English was an American gynecologist who was the first black woman to open a private practice in New York. She was also known for her work in real estate and health care, in addition to her philanthropy towards the arts.

English was born on December 17, 1920 to Jennie English and Whittie Sr. in Ontario, Virginia. She moved to Englewood, New Jersey in 1939. Her family was one of the first black families in Englewood. She attended Hunter College for her bachelor’s degree until 1949, and earned her Master’s in Psychology at New York University. She initially wanted to become a psychiatrist, but ended up choosing gynecology after discovering her interest at Meharry Medical College where she earned her medical degree in gynecology.

Dr.Josephine English opened her practice at Harlem Hospital. Once in Brooklyn, she opened up a women’s health clinic in Bushwick in 1956, as well as another in Fort Greene two decades later. During her career, English helped deliver 6,000 babies, including the children of Malcolm X, Betty Shabazz, and Lynn Nottage.

English’s interest in health care lead her establish the Adelphi Medical Center and child care programs, such as Up the Ladder Day Care and After School Program. Her passion for theater led her to establish the Paul Robeson Theater from a dilapidated church. She helped actors create performances to educate the populace on health and nutrition.

CARTER™️ Magazine

[philomenie]

Shadow Warrior

Hitman! Jolly - Part 2

CN despair, grief, mention of abortion, mafiatheme, violence, sexual tension, cheating, guilt, +18

If I forgot to mark something as CN, please let me know so I can add it!

@nojoyontheburn @jilliemiw86 @dsireland86 @aubrey-melinoe

ONE

“Doc Olivia, Doc Olivia....” excitedly, the boy scurries through the waiting patients to the registration desk, stretching his neck to find the doctor. “Carlos, what is it?” he can hear her warm voice through all the commotion in the emergency room of the pro bono clinic. Almost immediately, she appears in his field of vision. Tall, her slender limbs are clad in green surgical trousers and a green surgical gown, over which she is wearing a white doctor's coat, which urgently needs to be changed as there are various blood splashes on it. She has tucked her long, unruly, dark curls under a surgical cap.

“My mom... she's outside, in the car.... She's screaming!” Carlos chokes out excitedly, ”The baby......” “Fuck....” escapes Olivia and she quickly organizes two nurses and a stretcher so that Carlo's mother, who is probably in labour and too early, can be taken to the hospital's delivery room. She also hastily paged a midwife and the gynecologist. Fuck, if this really is a premature birth, they're not equipped for it here... the child and the mother will have to be transferred to another clinic.... But then what about the damn costs... Olivia thinks feverishly while the crying woman is brought into the delivery room. After making sure that Carlo's mother is being cared for, she goes to a quiet corner of the clinic, pulls out her cell phone and, after a moment's hesitation, dials the contact.

“Olivia.... I thought I wouldn't see or hear from you again so soon after our last meeting....” smiles the charming, soft voice of the man she would have liked to strangle again with the first word. “Noah.....” growls Olivia, who has taken on the pseudonym of Nobu Seiichi Doi, the now head of the Yakuza in America, partly to annoy Doi, who prefers to hear her say his real name, as he has confirmed to her several times. “Well, dearest Olivia... what can I do for you? That's why you're calling and hardly to hear my voice... or to accept my dinner invitation after all....” Noah explains with a smile. “I have a pregnant woman here who is suffering a premature birth.... A premature premature birth!” growls Olivia, immune to his charm, ”I need your help!” “What am I supposed to do?” Noah Sebastian Davis aka Nobu Seiichi Doi wants to know from her, irritated. “Have her taken to your private clinic...” Olivia explains curtly, ”Neither the child nor the mother can be adequately cared for here, you know that!” “Liv.....” sighs Noah, getting no further. “Don't you dare call me that!” Olivia hisses tonelessly.

“Sorry, Olivia.... I can barely get ANYONE treated at my private clinic... Last week the accident on the construction site, then that idiot who shot his own face off....” growls Davis. “A PREMATURE BIRTH! The child must have a chance!” Olivia hisses back angrily. “Ok.....” sighs Davis, ”You're having dinner with me for this....” “No way!” growls Olivia, but at the same time she's feverishly wondering if it's not worth it. “Come on... just dinner... Nicholas and Nadja are there too!” Noah asks. “Nick is here again?” Olivia wants to know, who has become friends with the Cuban after all the events of the last two years.... God, has it really been two years? Olivia's heart clenches, as it always does when she thinks of Joakim. A tear steals down her cheek and drips silently onto the floor..... Joakim.... Automatically, she reaches for the ring she wears on a chain around her neck while on duty... her engagement ring in the shape of a star... the North Star... That was her, his North Star, the one he would always return to.... That's what he had sworn to her. But Joakim will never return to her in this life, as his mortal remains lie in the cursed graveyard, deep down in the earth.... His body, shattered by an explosion, rots in a coffin. Olivia has to pull herself together, can't break down crying again here and now.

“What now?” Noah tempts her. “Well... if Nick and Nadja are there, the invitation stands,” growls Olivia harshly. “Wonderful!” smiles Davis over the phone. “What about the child, the mother?” Olivia follows up. “I'll send an ambulance with an incubator, let my doctors know!” promises Davis, ”And please be on time, 9 pm, evening dress is appropriate! I'll send someone to pick you up!” Before Olivia can say anything back, Davis has hung up. Stunned, with a mixture of anger and disbelief, Olivia stares at her black display.... FUCK, she feels like she's been conned. But now she can hardly cancel. When she leaves the clinic later, it's already dark, and walks to the parking lot, she has that tingling sensation on the back of her neck again, as if she's being watched. It is particularly intense today. The hairs on the back of her neck and the fine hairs on her arms stand up and she gets goose bumps. Startled, she turns around and looks around nervously... Nothing.... Nevertheless, she can't shake this feeling of being watched, of being followed. FUCK, you're getting paranoid, Olivia tells herself, turns around again and continues on her way to her car, gets in unchallenged and drives off. His warm green-brown eyes are fixed on the car as it drives away. The tall, slim man steps out of the shadows a little, pulling his baseball cap down over his face. He has also pulled the hood of his hoodie over it, turned up the collar of his jacket and his hands are once again deep in the pockets of his black cargo pants. His entire outfit is black, as are his shoes.

He blends beautifully into the darkness as he retreats back into the shadows of the blocks of houses that surround the clinic where Olivia works. Slowly, he turns and walks to his car, sits in it, starts it. He doesn't have to follow Olivia's car on sight because he knows exactly where she's going. Home to the small suburb where she lives in a little house... alone, except for her roommate, Milo, a pit bull mix, who is staying with a neighbor while Olivia works. The man drives up to the house at a leisurely pace, stops not directly in front of it but a little further away and switches off the engine. The house is brightly lit and he can see that Olivia is upstairs, as her silhouette is visible behind the curtains. She is getting changed, then probably takes a shower, as she always does when she comes home from work.... Then she puts on comfortable clothes and, if she doesn't cook herself, has something brought in by the delivery service. Preferably Asian.... Asian of all things.... The man grimaces as he immediately thinks of Doi. His anger at the head of the Yakuza has not diminished in the year he has not seen him. He simply cannot forgive him for his actions. The very actions that have more or less forced him to live in the shadows. Since he has officially declared him dead, dead to the world, dead to the underworld, dead to Olivia... his Olivia, his Liv, his North Star. Joakim has to breathe in and out deeply to calm down again. After he was finally able to move again, to walk, one day he disappeared from Doi's house without a sound. The bastard had taken him there after he had been discharged from hospital. Doi made sure that he got everything he needed to get fit again. Still, for not telling Olivia that he survived the damn explosion, Joakim just can't forgive Doi. Doi didn't just make him suffer, no, he almost destroyed Olivia with that news. Joakim's plan was actually to go to Olivia immediately, take her to him and disappear with her... but Doi had sown deep doubts in him as to whether it wouldn't be better for Olivia if he stayed dead, so that she would be safe.

In addition, his physical condition, his different appearance due to the scars, also prevented him from doing so, as he was afraid Olivia would shy away from it.

So he disappeared alone for a while, had to sort himself out and rethink a lot of things. To do this, he flew to Sweden, back to his home country. He stayed there for almost a year and bought a farm a little away from civilization. He got the money for it from Ruffilo. The Cuban supported him in everything he planned. A friendship has developed between the two men in the meantime and Nicholas has also encouraged him to come back and fetch Olivia. Which was actually his plan. But Olivia has also moved on, as Joakim discovered. She has left her job at the research institute and moved out of the new apartment. Instead, she is working in a clinic again, a special clinic, a clinic supported and financed by Doi. Back in the cursed city that has meant so much suffering for him, but also immense happiness..... because he found his Liv there. He has now seen Doi and Olivia together several times. Joakim feels sick when he thinks of every single time. How obliging Doi is towards her.... And Olivia doesn't seem to be averse to his charms either. Nobody knows that he's back.... Well, Ruffilo will probably suspect it, but he hasn't told him, Nadja or Alexei about his plans.

The fact that he has limited contact with Nadja again, and currently none at all, is due to Ruffilo. The two of them now have a relationship, a very intimate one, and Joakim is delighted that Nadja finally seems to have found happiness. Her marriage to Sergei is a sham and only serves as security for both of them. Nadja to support and secure her position, Sergej to live undisturbed with his lover, who is officially his bodyguard.

Shortly before the wedding, Sergej confessed his homosexuality to Nadja and Nadja was incredibly relieved because she was already madly in love with the Cuban. Joakim snorts in amusement, Nadja and really in love.... Who would have thought it? He knows that he owes his life to her and Ruffilo. If it hadn't been for both of them and their tenacity, he would have died under the rubble, the dead Kolja on top of him. The fact that he also owes his life to this shitty little asshole of all people still seems like sheer mockery to Joakim... but well.... He can't remember anything else, only that he woke up at some point, in pain, unable to move and his first thought was Liv..... He didn't really realize at first that he had been in a hospital, nor exactly what had happened, as he kept dozing off in the early days, after the month-long coma he had been in. What came afterwards was no less bad.... Especially as he now had to experience and suffer it while fully conscious. But the worst thing about it all was that his Liv thought he was dead... he had to endure it all without her. She was also his only motivation to get back on his feet, even though the doctors didn't give him too much hope as he had suffered multiple fractures. In fact, there wasn't a mendable bone left in his body. But he still made it. You can hardly see it now, only those who know him or observe him closely can see that he still walks with a slight limp and occasionally his body starts to shake uncontrollably. But even that is getting better and better, only when he is tense does it happen more often. However, the other scars that now cover his body will never go away. The large, long scar on his face is particularly troublesome.... That's why he now wears his hair almost exclusively loose, usually with a baseball cap pulled low over his face.

Suddenly Joakim is startled out of his thoughts and up, as Olivia is just about to leave her house. His mouth is open in amazement, she looks simply stunning.... He has to swallow and sits up to get a better look at her. She is wearing a dark green, tight satin dress. High-necked, long with a slit at the side. Satin pumps in the same color. A black jacket over it and a black clutch, discreet silver jewelry. One side of her hair is pinned back, the other falls lush and curly over her shoulders. God....she is simply beautiful, Joakim thinks and his chest tightens as he stares at her. A black limousine approaches her house and stops in front of it. Joakim's heart stops for a moment when he sees WHO is getting out and walking towards Olivia, hugging her. DOI.... Joakim would like to storm out and beat the bastard to a pulp, but instead he clenches his fists and realizes how tears of anger and despair burn in his eyes. Damn... Doi and Olivia? As the limo drives away with them, a tear rolls down his cheek. Damn.... Did Doi end up taking Olivia after all? Has Olivia succumbed to his charm? Is he too late? The questions gnaw at him and he feels miserable. What should he do now?

Beaming, Doi looks at Olivia, who avoids his gaze. “You look really charming tonight.... Appropriate for the occasion!” smiles Doi. “You said evening wear!” Olivia shrugs unimpressed, ”A bit over the top for a simple dinner in my opinion... but well, I know by now that you're a bit eccentric at times!” “Oh, it's really not a simple dinner!” Doi laughs. Olivia narrows her eyes, “What's that supposed to mean? WHERE are you taking me?” “To a banquet....” smiles Doi.

“FUCK, NOAH!” Olivia roars angrily, ”You set me up... I'm your fucking escort for a fucking banquet???” Grinning, Doi shrugs his shoulder, brushing back his now shoulder-length hair, “I needed a presentable escort, it's a banquet at the mayor of our fair city after all, and I'm invited as the guest of honor..... Therefore.....” “Noah, you really are an asshole.... Stop the car, I want to get out... I'm not playing your fucking games!” Olivia hisses angrily. “No... you're going with me and I'll tell you why, because you're going to get so many donations and sponsors for your clinic. I've already made sure of that in advance and when the gentlemen see you tonight, their wallets will be all the looser!” Doi explains calmly. Olivia glares angrily at him, “I'm so disgusted by these machinations ....” she chokes out. “Well, everything's a business, you know that. You're not stupid!” smiles Doi ”And you know how important donations are... if I'm the only one funding the clinic all the time, some people will probably notice and they'd better not... SO it's safer for you!” “I should never have gotten involved!” growls Olivia. “What....” Doi looks at her, waiting. “On everything.....” she hisses angrily, ”On you.....” “You got involved in all this when you got involved with HIM....” Doi snorts. Olivia's features freeze, she looks at Doi icily, “HE has absolutely nothing in common with YOU, the one here.... HE was forced to live like this, YOU want to live like this, really enjoy it!” she spits at him. “And yet he killed ruthlessly when he was told to... probably innocent people too!” Doi points out. “God... I loathe you more than I can say right now!” Olivia chokes out.

“That didn't stop you from getting into my bed... sort of business and also...” Doi doesn't get any further as Olivia gives him a resounding slap across the face. “That's something I'll never forgive myself for!” she hisses ”And it will never happen again!” Doi looks at her like a predator before leaning towards her in a flash, cupping her face in his hands and kissing her greedily. Olivia is frozen at first, but then she pushes him back with all her might, “Let me out... let me out now!” she hisses and punches him in the face again. Doi grabs her hand before she can strike a third time. “No.... We'll go to the fucking banquet now, you'll smile, collect money, enjoy yourself... and after.....” Doi tenderly strokes her cheek, her neck.

Olivia frees herself from his grip, “Never again in this life....” she glares angrily at him. “Never say never.....” Doi smiles and reaches for Olivia's hand, which she immediately snatches from his grasp. “Noah...” she warns him urgently. Apologizing, he raises his hands, “Sorry... I'll behave myself from now on, I swear!” Olivia presses her jaws together. It's hard to describe her connection with him... on the one hand, she hates his guts because she holds him primarily responsible for Joakim's death. On the other hand, this man exerts a kind of magic on her that she can't completely escape, culminating in them ending up in bed together. Before that, they had argued, as they always do, and when Olivia got violent, Doi kissed her and she kissed him back. One thing led to another and after they both practically tore each other's clothes off, they had sex.... Good sex, as Olivia has to admit. Doi is an experienced and talented lover, knew exactly what he was doing.

Afterward, Olivia was devastated... she betrayed Joakim.... That was all she felt and thought and Doi knew it the moment he looked at her. He left without a word and didn't contact her again for a long time... until weeks later and since then their relationship has cooled even more than before. It all happened a quarter of a year ago and Olivia still doesn't know exactly why she fell for this man, as she still loves Joakim more than anything and has no intention of letting another man into her life. Well, except for Doi, who forces his way into her life, and in a way she lets him.

When the limousine pulls up outside the front door of the magnificent estate, Olivia has to swallow. FUCK, what the hell has she gotten herself into, she thinks to herself in despair. Doi gets out, opens the door to her side and gallantly holds out her hand, which Olivia studiously ignores and gets out of the car without any help, ignoring him and walking towards the entrance. Doi hurries to her side and places his hand on her lower back, causing Olivia to flinch and take a small leap forward. “FUCK, Noah...” she hisses angrily, ”Leave it!” He leans towards her, “You're MY escort today and I'm the only one allowed to touch you.... Do you understand?” he whispers harshly in her ear. Olivia's eyes widen in understanding, “Otherwise I'd be fair game, so to speak, at this damn banquet?” she hisses. “That's one way of putting it, yes.....” smiles Doi. “The evening can't get any more disgusting....” growls Olivia, but no longer fends off Doi's hand, instead enduring it against her body..... or rather, his touch sends shivers through her body, completely upsetting her and she would have done anything to make his hand disappear.

As they both enter the hall, Doi is greeted by various people, mostly men. Olivia watches the spectacle with lowered eyelashes... most of them she knows, at least by sight, the mayor, various city councillors, senators, then the head of the local police department, just to name a few. When the handshakes and introductions are finally over, Doi has really introduced her to all these men, they can finally go to their table. “WHERE is Nicholas and Nadja?” snorts Olivia irritably, as she can't spot them anywhere. “I'm sure they'll be here....” Doi seems just as irritated by this as she is, as they both sit down. Just as the first speeches are about to begin, they both dart into the hall, head straight for Olivia and Doi and sit down. Nadja beams at Olivia next to her and takes her hands in hers, “Nice to see you again, it feels like it's been ages!” Olivia smiles at her just as warmly, “I know... busy... you probably are too!” “Oh yes.....” Nadja laughs. Nicholas smiles just as warmly at her, “It's good to see you, Olivia, especially to finally see you laughing again!” Olivia has to swallow at these words, she grits her teeth and nods at him. Nicholas knows immediately that he has made a mistake and looks at her apologetically, “I didn't mean to... oh, damn it!” he growls. “It's okay, I'm really happy to see you... what are Nikolaj and Zoja doing?” she wants to know.

Ruffilo has taken in the two little orphans and is raising them together with his own children. He wants to give them what Joakim wanted for them. A quiet life, away from violence and crime, with love and security.... As much as you can ask of a Yakuza arms dealer. But that's exactly what Nicholas wants for the children, as well as for his own. Doesn't want any of them to follow in his footsteps.... “Oh, Nikolaj is a whirlwind, he and Tajo keep everyone on their toes and Zoja is just a piece of gold!” beams Nicholas. “Good grief.... They're children!” Doi rolls his eyes, who has little use for children. “Of course that comes from YOU!” Olivia hisses at him and Doi rolls his eyes again. The speeches drag on and Olivia feels like she's really wasting her life here. She struggles to stifle a yawn. Nadja leans towards her, “I need to talk to you.... Urgently!” she whispers to her. Olivia looks at her questioningly. “Not here... let's go to a quiet corner later...” Nadja whispers and leans back in her seat. Before Olivia can think about it any further, everyone starts clapping and Olivia hopes with all her heart that the speeches are over now, which fortunately they are.

The food is served quickly and everyone is busy with it for the time being. Olivia only now realizes how hungry she is and eats gratefully. Out of the corner of her eye, she notices Nadja poking around listlessly and barely touching a bite. Suddenly she stands up and hurries out of the room. Doi looks after her, frowning, “What's wrong with her?” he wants to know from Ruffilo, who just shrugs his shoulders, clueless and confused. Olivia stands up, “I'll go and look for her!” she declares, earning her a grateful look from Ruffilo. Olivia doesn't have to search for long, she finds Nadja on the terrace of the estate, where she breathes in the fresh night air. Concerned, she puts an arm around the smaller woman, “Hey, what's wrong? Are you feeling sick?” “Yes..... all the time.... For fuckin 6 weeks....” Nadja blinks against the tears forming in her eyes. Olivia turns pale, “You're pregnant.....” she whispers. Nadja nods silently, the tears now rolling down her cheeks, which she wipes away in annoyance, “I think I'm about 10 weeks....” “You haven't been to the doctor yet?” Olivia asks, stunned. “No! That's why I wanted to talk to you....” Nadja looks at her pleadingly. “You don't want to keep it....” Olivia swallows. “I can't keep it!” Nadja cries, ”Everyone would immediately recognize that it's not Sergei's if it's in the world. And then I'd have a huge problem!” “Why?” Olivia wants to know.

“Because some will be bothered by it... God, Sergei is blond, fair-skinned, like me and Nicholas..... well, you know what he looks like... The child will surely take after him!” sighs Nadja, ”I could dig my own grave if I keep it..... Especially because the Italians are getting cheeky!” “Come to the clinic tomorrow, I'll make sure you're examined, Anonymous! And then we'll figure out what to do together!” Olivia nods, ”Nicholas doesn't know about this?” Nadja shakes her head, “No.... And he mustn't find out either.... It would break his heart!” “Nadja....” Olivia looks at her pleadingly. “Olivia, please.... He mustn't find out!” Nadja chokes out. “Certainly not from me. I'm also bound by medical confidentiality, because you're my patient!” Olivia assures her. Nadja hugs Olivia gratefully, “I knew I could count on you!” she sighs with relief. “Always!” Olivia nods, ”But let's go back inside when you're well again, so Nicholas doesn't get suspicious!” They have already moved on to dessert in the hall and Nadja feels sick again just looking at the chocolate mousse. So she pushes the plate away from her, which earns her a questioning look from Nicholas. “Is something wrong? You've hardly eaten anything.....” He leans towards her, concerned. “No, I'm just feeling a bit sick, that's all....” Nadja evades him, beaming at him, ”Don't worry, I've just got a bit sick to my stomach!” “Should we go home?” Nicholas wants to know immediately. “No, everything's fine!” Nadja assures him. Nicholas doesn't really believe her and watches her closely. Doi gives Olivia a questioning look, which she ignores. Sighing, he stands up and holds out his hand to her, “Come on, let's raise some money for your clinic, introduce you to a few more important people!” With flashing eyes, Olivia takes Doi's hand and stands up, “I hate being shown off!” she hisses. “You're not being shown off, I'm just helping you make important connections, connections that could be very useful to you!” he explains quietly. “I want absolutely NOTHING to do with this dirty business!” she hisses. “No dirty business, I promise you... very few people here know WHO I really am. To them, I'm just Noah Sebastian Davis, a successful businessman with a clean slate!” smiles Doi. “God, do you actually listen to yourself talk?” growls Olivia in disgust, ”You're so smug.....” Doi stops short, “Olivia, I'm doing this for you....” he tenderly brushes a strand of hair out of her face.

“You don't think I believe you.... I'm sure there's something in it for you too!” she hisses at him, ”And leave my hair alone!” Doi laughs softly, “All right, I get it! Come on then... let's shake some more hands!” “Fabulous!” Olivia rolls her eyes, but then puts on a smile, ready to keep shaking hands to raise money for her clinic. Because she knows that without more sponsorship and donations, she will hardly be able to keep the clinic going as more and more patients need to be cared for there. Exhausted, Olivia later lies down in her seat in the limousine. Doi leans over her, caresses her cheek and Olivia immediately grabs his hand. “Noah, one more move like that and I'll strangle you today!” she hisses at him. “I'm sorry... but it's just really hard for me....” Doi sighs and drops into his seat, smiling apologetically at her. “Leave it... really!” hisses Olivia angrily, ”I just want to get home and into my bed now!” “I was hoping you'd still come with me.....” smiles Doi. “GOD, NOAH!!! NO!” Olivia screams at him, ”THERE IS NOTHING BETWEEN US AND THERE WILL NEVER BE ANYTHING BETWEEN US!” “That's a shame!” sighs Doi, ”You really are the first woman I've ever wanted to settle down with...” “You're so predictable....” hisses Olivia, ”You only want me because I don't want you, that's all!”

“No!” Doi shakes his head sternly, ”I really care about you, Olivia!” “Don't talk nonsense, Noah.” growls Olivia, ”There's nothing between us and there never will be!” “We'll see.....” Doi shrugs his shoulder with a smile. His thoughts, however, return to the conversation he and Nicholas had when Olivia was away with Nadja.

Nicholas had asked if he was still in contact with Karlsson, just in passing, which had caught Doi's attention. To be honest, Doi had banished Karlsson from his thoughts since he had disappeared off the face of the earth. Doi was only right when he realized over time that Karlsson did NOT show up at Olivia's, taking her with him... So he could make his move on her... FINALLY and without having a guilty conscience towards Karlsson. So Doi narrowed his eyes and denied the question and immediately asked a counter question, “Why the hell do you want to know NOW?” “Well, just like that....” replied Nicholas evasively.... “Just like that... uhum.....” snorted Doi. “I'm a bit worried about our Swedish friend!” Nicholas had then sighed.

“Worried? Why? He's been off the face of the earth for ages... probably in hiding!” Doi shrugged his shoulder “I was in contact with him... now he's really disappeared......” Nicholas replied seriously. “In contact.....” Doi was speechless for a moment, as he had known absolutely nothing about this. “Yes... you know that I would have been dead long ago without him! And I'm a man of my word!” rumbled Nicholas. “FUCK, Nick..... I've done everything I can to get him back on his feet!” Doi spat at him in response. “Yes, absolutely, Nobu, and at the same time you took away the most important thing in the world from him... Olivia, by declaring him dead.... And now you're courting her like a rooster!” Nicholas hissed angrily. “FUCK... she was finished.... No one thought the bastard would survive... and if he did, he'd be a moronic cripple with the injuries!” Doi hissed angrily. “He survived, though, and far from being a moronic cripple, he's more dangerous than ever, if you ask me. You took away the man's future... with her!” declared Nicholas coolly. “So you want to warn me about Karlsson....” Doi was speechless again. “Well, at least you shouldn't come between him and Olivia if he turns up here. Good advice!” Nicholas made it clear. Before Doi could answer, Nadja and Olivia returned and the conversation was over. Nicholas could never forgive him for telling Olivia that Karlsson was dead. Nicholas was about to tell Olivia everything, which Doi narrowly managed to prevent, as Olivia was safer that way... Although he is exposing Olivia to great danger himself, if you look at it the right way, because he is showing himself in public with her. But Doi has now decided to send several men to watch out for her safety. The conversation just now has supported him in his decision. If Karlsson really does turn up here again, he wants to be forewarned.... And then he'll have to see.... “What are you thinking about?” Olivia's voice cuts through his thoughts. “Hm?” Doi looks at her, startled, ”Nothing more... just what I have to do in the next few days!” “Just keep it to yourself!” snorts Olivia, ”I don't want to know!” “Of course!” smiles Doi, looking out the window of the limo, ”Oh we're almost there.... You probably don't want to invite me to your place for a coffee....” The look Olivia gives him speaks volumes. “Okay, I get it! I hope we meet again soon!” he smiles charmingly. “I hope not!” Olivia murmurs grumpily, but before she gets out, she kisses him quickly on the cheek, ”Thank you.... For your help!” Doi holds her hand for a moment, looking at her seriously, “Always.... You know that!” Olivia nods, getting out quickly as her heart races. FUCK, what were you thinking, you stupid cow, she scolds herself as she walks to her front door, doesn't turn around again and with trembling fingers puts the key in the lock and unlocks it. Inside, she leans against the front door, exhausted. FUCK.... She mustn't see Doi again... that man is just a walking red flag! She reaches for her ring, strokes it... Fuck Joakim.... Why aren't you here, she swallows in her mind and hot tears stream down her cheeks until despair hits her again so hard that she slides down against the door, sobbing and curling up on the floor, wailing and whimpering. Milo, who has noticed this, comes to her whimpering, gently sniffs her hair and lies down next to her, his dog's snout pressed into her stomach. Crying and trembling, Olivia embraces her dog, hugs him to her and lets her tears and despair flow freely.

[flowerandblood]

my private sadness under the cut, feel free to scroll it

Today I cried for the first time on the phone to my husband after visiting the gynecologist. In three months, if nothing changes, we will be sent to a fertility clinic.

There are months when I don't have a period at all: a normal woman would think she's pregnant, but I know it's a sign that something is wrong again. Seeing a very pregnant woman after leaving his office, something inside me broke, because it's been two years since we've been trying.

Thank God I don't live in a medieval times, lol.

I don't want any advice, me and the doctor know what we are doing and what the plan is. I just want to throw out my sadness somewhere, because my husband is struggling with it (not that we can't have children, but that it makes me suffer – he is very protective over me).

Every time I write about it here I feel a little better.

[drkelvinlarwood]

Delivering the Best in Maternity Services Dr. Kelvin Larwood's Buderim's Outstanding Public Maternity Hospital.

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