#pretty sure a fuck ton of cocaine was required

[volixia669]

Some musicals you joke were made on crack. (Stares at Moulin Rouge) And then there's musicals you KNOW were made on crack. (Stares at Cats, Starlight Express)

[lovesaadiqa]

BBL Costs, Prep + Recovery

Im booked!!  I talked to a few friends who I know either got this surgery or is getting this done.  I wanted one since forever but I wanted my teeth done first.  The deciding factor came down to my birthday plans.  

Originally I was going to do a birthday tour.  First weekend of October in Miami for carnival, 2nd weekend in Atl for Freak Nik, 3rd weekend in Bahamas and finally Nola for the finale.  Well Nola was just hit with a storm so yeah that’s out. Once I totaled up the flights, hotels, food and spending money.. I was like hmm, I can get a fat ass and started this process.  Immediately looked into surgeon and Dr. Pena was my favorite, his bodies come out so mf snatched, he’s located in Columbia.  Columbian surgeons can take out way more fat than American doctors however, the fatality rate is stupid and ultimately the factor that made me choose an American doctor.  

The next step was choosing the surgeon for the body I have and the one I want.  I weigh 151 and im 5′6″ I’m considered a “skinny bbl”.  I started researching doctors in Atlanta (so I could recover at home) and Miami (like duh).  I chose to go with Dr. Desouza in Miami with CG Cosmetics for a few reasons.  First, I love the look of his skinny bbl’s on other women with the same body type, weight and height as me.  Secondly, he was having a special for the end of the year (lipo 360, bbl, jplasma for $6500 for the surgeon I wanted) this almost sold me but it was the surgery date!!  Jplasma is skin tightening procedure to help with loose skin, you can only get this with lipo.  When they perform lipo they created canals under your skin to remove the fat.. well those same canals are essential when getting Jplasma.

Ok so I decided on the surgeon, contacted the cosmetic group and had a consultation which is pretty much just front, side and back view pictures.. I think they use this to make sure you don’t need a tummy tuck prior to surgery.  They also asked me questions about previous surgeries and if i’ve ever had anesthesia.  The next step went pretty quickly, we talked about what would be lipo’d (abs, waist, back.. I wanted inner thighs, an additional 2k, but was advised to wait on my pre-op to decide), when I wanted to book and how I'd pay.  My consult was on August 30th.. I bitched up when she attempted to take my payment.  I am a money hoarder and spending that much money made me feel like I was being financially irresponsible.  I called one of my Aunt’s who I felt wouldn’t judge me and also give me sound advise.  We talked about my fears, why I was getting the procedure and of course money.  My Aunt gave me excellent advice, reassured me and is a professional CNA who offered to accompany me so yeah I dare not turn that down, lol.  August 31, 2021, I called my coordinator (the contact between me and my surgeon) and told her I wanted to book, she asked me when I’d be ready and I requested first available which was 9/20/21!! Excited is an understatement.. I'd be 24 days post op on my birthday.  After I calmed down I paid in full for multiple reasons:  had to in order to secure the date, all surgeries book in this year had to be paid in full, it was the only way to get the discount.. My coordinator gave me so much information I couldn’t see straight (I was also high as shit off life thinking about a fat ass and me in the same sentence).. she emailed + texted everything, congratulated me and we hung up.

I get the emails:  “raise you hemoglobin with these vitamins” I purchased vitamin C $2, folic acid $2, iron $3 and floradix $35 - amazon, I take them as directed on the bottle and start eating my ass off (just to give my surgeon more to work with, lol).  Talking to one of my gf’s I realize I have to be cleared for surgery?!?!  What?  I open my email and sure enough I have to have blood work done 15-20 prior to surgery, it was 9/3 and a Friday.. SHIT!! I fly over to an Piedmont Wellstreet urgent care facility as recommended by my friend (she started this process as well so I was crazy grateful for her experience and that she shared it with me).  Urgent care was full but opened the next day, my ass was in that line at 7:32 am, I was the 13th person in line and they opened at 8.  I get to the desk and my appointment is at 10:30 and I'd have to pay the office visit fee to be seen, it was $155.  I came back at my allotted time and was told how much all of my labs would be.. $302.  My labs were to be processed and faxed to my surgeon by 9/9 because Labor Day weekend so.. yeah.  

I discuss accommodations with my Aunt and realize it’s cheaper, safer and more beneficial for me to go to a recovery house.  I search high and low baby and most of them were booked.. found one regardless with lymphatic massages included called Flawless Recovery House.  This wasn’t my 1st-6th option but the one with availability on my surgery date so I paid a deposit to hold onto my spot.  Total was $1312 for 5 days with 5 massages, I paid a $200 deposit.  Next, I booked my flight, round trip $116 with Delta.  My surgery date is on a Monday, I have to have my pre-op done on the Saturday prior so I booked a hostel from the 18th-20th on booking.com for $66.  I know I could have gotten an airbnb or hotel room but I wanted this experience.  I want to go to Amsterdam and stay in a hostel so I need to know what to expect.  Also I cannot party, smoke, drink or eat before surgery so fuck it.. a hostel will do, lol. 

I smoke big fucking weed and watched someone else’s bbl journey today and realize if I fail the drug test, my surgery will be cancelled and it’ll cost me $1500 to reschedule.  Boy the shit sent me into panic mode like I've never experienced before, only to find out the weed isn’t the issue nicotine is, it slows down your heart rate.  I can smoke weed just not out of a wood or a rillo and nicotine takes 3-4 days to get out of your system so a bitch barely made it.  I just won't be smoking until I get back home lol.  Just to be super informative no alcohol, diabetic meds, cocaine, pcp or anything that will fool with your heart or makes your bleed.  Today is 9/11 and im one week out from my pre-op... my body is a joke cause I haven’t gained a single pound and normally it’s nothing for me to put on weight.  I took my acrylics off, when you’re put to sleep they monitor your oxygen levels with those clamps they put on your fingers and they aren't the most accurate when you have on dark polish or acrylics.  I also cannot wear lashes cause when they go to fill this ass in I'll be laying flat on my face.  I mean my hair didn’t have requirements but I figure since im naked I might as well be bald.. y'all should see me rn, I look very much like a young man but im hype.  I’ll be back later to tell y'all what I pack and purchase prior to my flight.  Imma put the dates at the end of each update.. today is 9/11/21

My surgery group send me list of supplies  that I would need and the cost came to roughly $1100.  Naive me was definitely going to purchase everything on the list from them until I saw Leslie’s (@prettyhaute - on ig) bbl vlog.  I went on amazon and got away with murder.  Below I’ll list what I purchased and the price I paid versus what the surgery center was quoting me.

Faja - I paid $74.69 - Quoted $160.50 || BBL Pillow - $26.99 - Qouted $42.80 || Arnica pills - $8.95 - Quoted $37.45 || Compression socks - $13.99 for 3 - Quoted $10.70 for 1 || Foams - $17.99 for 3 - Quoted $64.20 for 3 || Scar Cream  $$29.82 - Quoted $80.25 || Arnica Gel - $7.92 - Quoted $21.40 || 

There a shit ton of items on the suggested list that I didn't purchase but way more items that wasn’t on the list I still need for instance:

Crocs, benadryll, robe, adult diapers, straws, earplugs, liquid iv, stool softener, antiseptic body wash, avocado float, back board, urinal, pineapple juice, throat calm, 3 moo-moo’s and a massage roller (the crocs are the only thing on this list that cost more than $20).  My flight is at 7:15a tomorrow and im so damn nervous but excited.  I will spend Saturday and Sunday gallivanting around Miami and then body , ody, ody, ody, ody, ody.  I still have to send my entire itinerary to my aunt but I think im all set.  9/17/21

Pre-op was packed but I went on Saturday and was in and out in an hour.  I was charged for a covid $80, 3 post-op massages $150 and a drug test $20.  I went over my clearance paper work with a medical assistant who also took 9 before pics of me.  Keep in mind, your surgery can be cancelled or reschedule if all of you labs aren’t at the surgery center on pre-op day.  I cannot stress how important it is to take your labs with you!!!  Mine were faxed over from urgent care but I was also provided copies which I took with me.  The photos were sent directly to my surgeon to analyze before surgery.  From my knowledge, I was also to be fitted for my faja but that never happened, do NOT leave pre-op without a faja!!! I paid for 3 massages from CG totaling $150 which I regret badly.  I do NOT recommend getting massages from the surgery center.  There are 4-5 different surgeons performing surgeries on any given day and they do at minimum 4 surgeries per day, that’s at least 15-20 different girls with the same surgery and post-op date.  CG had 2 massage therapists to drain 15-20 girls.  I was drained for 9 mins, your drain massages should last at least 45 mins for maximum drainage.  I only used 1 of the 3 massages I paid for and was denied a refund.  That is a huge downside to CG once they have your money good fucking luck getting it back! Ps. Ellie was a royal fucking cunt!!!!!  She told my medical assistant that I didn’t need a faja so I was never fitted for one and woke up out of surgery with a binder on versus a faja like I should have.  I wanted to slap the shit out of her and took the charge on the chin but I wanted my surgery so I refrained.. I was put on a 12 hour fast and contacted an hour after pre-op with my surgery address and time.  My fast started at 7pm the day before surgery and my surgery time wa at 6:30a, there was a $300 for showing up to surgery late.  All I could bring to surgery was compression socks and a faja (that I didn’t have), I was instructed to bathe with dial (the orange one) before surgery to make sure my incisions weren’t infected, no lotion, perfume, deodorant, makeup, nails, lashes, no jewelry/piercing or hair products and no personals ie, purse money, wallet also you will need a companion or surgery will be cancelled.  I’ll upload all my paperwork at the end.   Surgery day arrive at the surgery center at 6:15 am how about the entire fucking staff was late!  Bitch I was outside in Miami alone with compression socks on and a moo moo, LIVID.  No one arrived until 7:10 am, baby I wanted to kill everyone but fuck it, it was go time.  I’m escorted to a room, changed into a paper gown, piss tested, my labs were reviewed again and finally my surgeon comes in!  We were in the exam room alone which was weird cause I was asshole naked but he kept it 1000% professional, he asked me what I wanted and I say “the fattest ass” he looked me dead in my eyes without a single hesitation and said “it’ll heal like a diaper”  LMAO.  I showed him areas that I wanted lipo’d to death and he marked me up, I didn’t aka e picture of my mark ups but shit was rolling by then, he walked out I put my paper gown back on and the anesthesiologist walked in.  I expressed my biggest concerns to him, I didn’t want to die and I didn’t want to wake up during surgery.  He explain why the drug test was so important because certain street drugs will have adverse effect with the anesthesia.  My anesthesiologist walked me up to the surgery room and I hopped on the table, they put massage boots on both of my feet and inserted an iv, the mask was put on my face and my heart rate went to heaven, I wanted to shit myself bro.  The anesthesiologist told me to make a tight fist, I asked what time it was, 8:08am.. I woke up to a nurse helping me into a wheelchair with a binder around my waist and I was scream crying because my entire body ached, I didn't know where I was and the anesthesia is no hoe.  I was escorted to my recovery house’s transportation van and taken to my damn bed.  

I chose Flawlesss Recovery House with Ms. Opal.  I paid a $200 deposit before 2 weeks before surgery and the balance the day I left.  I opted for a 5 day stay.  I loved it there bro and couldn’t imagine trying to recover at a hotel or air bnb!  There were nurses there 24-7, I was roomed with one other girl but the house had a total of 4 bedrooms, one of which no one occupied and the door was always shut but my room was the only room with 2 beds, the others had 3 beds.  I had a call button, it was love, the nurses came expeditiously when I rang it.  They made 3 home cooked meals per day and I don’t eat meat, they accommodated me with no hesitation.  I loved it man.  So couple hours after surgery I attempted to use the bathroom on my own and blacked out, the anesthesia is really fucking strong and took an entire day to wear off (for me), the nurses helped me pee in a cup until then.  Post op day 9/21/21, I went in to make sure I looked good, got a faja finally and received that lousy as drain.  Back to the recovery house I was able to walk finally w/o passing out and in went my foams, I also could pee by myself with the use of a urinal.  I was constipated for 2 days, first bowel movement was on post op day 2. I paid for an independent massage therapist named Tatiana, she used a ultrasound machine to massage me so I cancelled her.  When I took my faja off for my massage it was washed and dried by the time I was done, I took a shower and put my faja on with my foams.  I cancelled Tatiana because don’t let nobody use no machine on you until you are at least 2 weeks post op, hand massages only.  All the girls were getting massaged by the literal best massage therapist (in my opinion) her name is Brittany, I could cry she was EVERYTHING, I was tender but she put the painful massage theory to bed!  She taught me how to drain myself and how to open my incisions without the q-tip looking thing.  In 45 mins she drained 5 of those doggy pad things worth of fluid off of me.  I received 4 massages in 5 days.  I left on Saturday 9/25/2021 on Sunday, back in Atlanta, I received my 5th massage and that when I was told I have not one but 2 seromas.  I swear on everything I love it was because everyone wakes up from surgery with a faja on but not me (Fuck you Ellie, lil bitch) I had on a binder (its what they use for tummy tucks).  The lady who did my 1st massage in Atlanta was Bri, not gone post her ig cause she did a damn good massage but when I asked her to syringe drain me the good sis stuck this long ass needle in my seroma but could get the fluid out, cancelled her too (the massage was good asf tho but nah).  Tired and tried I bit the bullet and booked a packed with Dream Body ($455 for 5 massage, I think, don’t quote me look it up on there site and follow them on ig)  because they are the biggest name in Atlanta, Jayda Wayda goes to them.  The  most painful massage yet, yes Michelle lil ass is so strong but she will get the fluid up off you.  She made me tear up bad and no matter how much I screamed or even tried to push her off of me she understood the assignment, Michelle helped me get back into my faja after my massage and told me my faja was too big and to have it altered.  She recommended a lady on ig @siri2sir but to know me is to know I altered my shit myself.  Allow me to tell y'all, I look good asf!!!!!!! 10/4/2021 

[uricl]

NEW POST ( 2/19/2020 )

I hung out with him one night a few years back. He is very conscious of his reputation and goes out of his way to act gentlemanly. He’s funny and makes a lot of jokes in person. I would say more but don’t want to reveal who I am as I’m still close with some members of his team.

He made a joke about his dick size and then profusely apologized (again - super self conscious about his reputation), let us wear his sunglasses in the club, sang along loudly to his own music on the radio in the car, laughed at all our jokes too. He’s a goofball for sure. It’s funny all the guys with the worst reputations have been the nicest in person and the guys with happy-go-lucky reputations are the worst (ahem, Kid Cudi…)

It is true he was doing cocaine in front of Royalty. His friends do drugs around her but Nia didn’t file a protective order that I know of. She was blackmailing him for more money. Nia smashed most of his friend and a few other famous celebs before running off somewhere.

He is just complex asf..especially since he had another baby. Right now he refuses to hang with any other girl that isn’t Nikia.

I met Uriel when I lived in Miami…he got his friend to get my number for him at LIV. We hung out for maybe three months, and most of the time we didn’t do anything sexual honestly. He would just invite me over to watch movies or something. I think he’s really lonely. He also does a shit ton of ketamine, lean, and cocaine. This was during the time when he was dating nika…I didn’t know about her but then again he is uriel cain so I assumed he was messing around with a ton of girls. He doesn’t like using condoms…I’ll tell you that.

He has a million arcade games in his house and he has racks of clothing everywhere (in the halls, in the kitchen, in the living room) you can barely walk around. But overall he was actually…sweet. Respectful. Always made sure I was taken care of. We kind of just fell off because he’s a totally different person on drugs

🔴 WE’VE GOT THE TEA FOR YOU.

his family has been trying to get Uriel some help for a long time. His issues are deeper then being immature he has SERIOUS dark issues.

i have specific details about his abuse. It wasn’t normal spankings. One instance that I this person gave me is that his stepdad took his head and slammed it into the wall. The person I knew said that he was severely abused and that his step father used to lock him in closets whenever he was upset.

He once admitted a few years back that he “lost his virginity” at 8 years old to a 14 year old girl. The fact that he willingly admitted it to the world proves that he thinks there was nothing wrong with a 14 year old sexually assaulting an 8 year old.

His stylist says he hardly eats. I think that’s bad since he does cardio and dances frequently but I’m not sure.

My friend who works for Uriel always stresses that he is by far the nicest and warm hearted people to work with. He has helped my friend with so much financially and emotionally. He’s provided opportunities to my friend when he was struggling and I know that he has helped many of his employees with financial stuff and with there kids schooling.

Ive always thought he has BPD but who knows for sure. He’s diagnosed as bipolar and has a severe case of PTSD. But maybe being bipolar mixed with the issues he has and self medicating with cocaine/crack has something to do with that. Im pretty sure he’s a pill popper (xan) too based on what this person was telling me.

Uriel never wanted to be a musician he actually wanted to play basketball professionally.

Also Uriel hit his mom as an adult not a child.

Uriel took both of those girls around his family alot. Im not sure about this since I didnt ask. Uriel’s mom loved Zhara (who did spoil his family especially the kids and his mom) and hated Avery.

Uriel can be one of the nicest and friendliest people, per everyone I’ve known that knows him (NOTE: this does not negate the facts of his abusive and poor behavior). There’s a reason he still has so many friends and supporters in the industry and in his private life; when he’s straight, he’s a pretty decent person at heart. But dealing with anybody with his kind of demons is scary and unpredictable. Some legitimate Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde shit. Untreated mental illness mixed with teenage fame, constant public criticism, some enabling in his circle, and drugs will do a hell of a number on a person.

The tea on lipstick alley may have some truth to it, Uriel entourage and even his family as a history of spilling his most inner dark secrets to TMZ, TSR, and many other gossip blogs to collect a coin. It doesn’t matter how many of his cleaners he sends in to clean up the threads/post on him it doesn’t matter. Uriel is an extremely private person for a reason, and sadly the public will never get much of a chance to see the true Uriel. His life has been nothing but a struggle since the day he was born, his problems have always been existent. Zhara WAS NEVER the cause of his problems and his family will always love her to pieces and he still loves her as a friend until this day. But I supposed Uriel was born to be just a handsome tragedy. The only reason why Uriel still as a career is because of Deleon, if it was for him Uriel’s fame would have burnt out a long time ago. Uriel blames his mom for the many issues he has now, how would you feel if your mother just stood by and watched her new husband beat on you? Yes, Uriel has a big-heart, yes he is kind and generous, but untreated mental illness mixed with teenage fame, constant criticism, along with enabling and drugs will do a toll on a person.

NEW POST ( 12/7/2018 )

Leilani Uriel’s former fling did an interview with TMZ and spoke about her relationship with the singer. She said the two were very close and could have been something more if she didn’t step away from him. She said women who have petite and have more oriental features or small features seem to be more attractive to Uriel than most girls with an average body shape. Even though Uriel as fucked woman outside of his type those are the type of woman he tends to go for more. Uriel requires all of his girls not to be a homie hopper’s, have a big mouth and run to blogs, and at least spend time with him for at least 3 weeks. But for the three weeks you spend with him he will spoil you with trips and constant shopping. Uriel loves woman that have something going for themselves but still want the help of a man, Uriel likes to take care of those he’s affiliated with, so as long you don’t break the rules all will be well.

Leilani spilled the tea when it came to Winter and Uriel’s relationship and said it wasn’t what it seemed. After Winter caught Uriel in bed with another woman and attempted to fight said girl, that’s when things turned ugly. Uriel gave winter to shop with to make up for his mistake, but winter wasn’t having it and threatened to fuck Uriel’s friend Capo to make Uriel jealous. When they got back to LA a few weeks later Winter left the harem and Uriel kept a professional relationship with her just for her to come back a few days later, and then leave the harem again two days later. Uriel and Winter never had sex after the New York incident and Winter went outside of the harem to get fucked. Countless times Winter threatened to buy Uriel out of the development contract he had signed to her to, when she had the money to buy him out she did. And that pretty much ended their relationship.

[sttngfashion]

Phantasms - 7.6

I could have sworn we did this ep, like, a WHILE ago, but I think I was just remembering the cake from my childhood viewing of the series because that cake is not an image you get out of your head. You’ll see. 

There's not a ton of fashion in this episode, but there is some truly bananas shit. The episode opens with SPOOKY-ASS MUSIC and Data seeing what look like some miners busting a hole in the wall of the Enterprise:

When you have an emotional breakthrough but you realize you literally punched a hole in your wall

The miners or whatever are dressed in some mid-to-late 1800s looks, and have some truly incredible layering going on:

These outfits have everything: overalls, vests, vests over overalls, suspenders under overalls, neckerchiefs

I'm pretty sure that dude on the right is wearing overalls AND suspenders AND a belt?? Maybe it's a tool belt, but like...the whole thing with overalls is that they go...over...all. I also enjoy the fedora as a work hat, because it does absolutely nothing to protect one's head (but does give the wearer the belief that they look like Indiana Jones even though they don't). Let’s also note that the middle guy is just straight-up wearing a flood lamp on his head.

The workers end up attacking Data and pulling off his head:

It's not fair / to remind me / of the cross-eyed head that you gave to me / you, you, you / Data's head

You can see here that Fedora Worker is wearing suspenders OVER his vest, which...that's not how suspenders are MEANT to be worn, but if that's how you want to roll, I'm not going to stop you. Layer everything. Wear a hat as a necklace. Fashion “rules” were established by a patriarchal society and are meant to keep us in our places and stifle our creativity and if wearing suspenders over a vest makes you feel revolutionary, YOU DO YOU.

After we see Data's head get ripped off, though, it turns out it was all a dream:

I really wanted to see Data’s PJs, but this does make sense

Is Data taking a Mondrian-inspired painting class? That work next to his bed (which is where I keep all MY unfinished paintings) looks like it's in progress rather than a part of his decor.

The main thrust of this episode is that Data is having weird dreams and that the Enterprise is installing a new warp core, so we spend a bit of time in Engineering, where we meet this adorable ensign:

When your hair needs to be pulled back for OSHA reasons but you've still got style

She's real cute, has picked a GREAT lip color to complement her Engineering Mustard, and she has a major crush on Geordi. Literally nothing comes of the fact that she's crushing on Geordi, so I think the writers just threw that detail in there to be nice.

Data is trying to figure out what's up with his weird dreams, so he researches the best way he knows how:

Even on a spaceship, cats take up as much space as possible

Spot is having a nap, and Data is watching her sleep to see if he can figure anything out.

Streeeeetch

He doesn't figure anything out, but I love Spot so it's fine. Instead, he sees Troi for a quick therapy sesh and her season 7 hair is doing it up:

This hair goes to 11

They talk a little bit about dream interpretation, and then we get to see Data sleep some more.

THRILL as Data TAKES A NAP

This dream is where the bonkers cake shows up. This cake honestly doesn't even look that good, but it still made me want some cake:

Cake to bridge: I'm delicious

Hmm, that's odd. There's a communicator badge on that cake. What could that possibly--

NOPE

One thing I will say for this cake is that it was made in a time before every fucking cake was, like, required by law to be covered in fucking fondant. FONDANT IS TRASH AND CAKES COVERED IN IT ARE ALSO TRASH. So on that level, I appreciate this cake for just having a sensible buttercream.

Other than that, this cake is a literal nightmare. In the dream, Data feels compelled to cut into Troi's right shoulder with a serrated cake knife:

Delicious?

This will be important later. Also important: Worf says that the cake is "a cellular peptide cake...with mint frosting." I don't know about you guys, but I feel like mint is a weird choice for a cellular peptide cake. Maybe a cream cheese would have been better?

Oh, also in this dream, Crusher is sucking out Riker's brains with a straw:

Curb_Your_Enthusiasm_Theme.mp3

This is probably a weird sex thing Riker would be into though. After this disturbing dream, Data decides to consult a dream expert:

Zis is ferry disturbink

Yes, that's ol' Siggy, the father of psychiatry and cocaine addict. Data visits him in the Holodeck. He's wearing a pretty straightforward three-piece suit:

I think that cigar is just a cigar

The touch I like here is that shirt lapel. Look how long that thing is!! Old-timey as fuck.

After Data's Freudian adventure, he's helping Geordi fix something related to the warp core (which isn't working at all) and he notices that this piece of the ship looks VERY similar to the cake knife:

I see you've played knifey-spooney before

Honestly, that thing looks so much like a weird Klingon knife that I feel like at some point Geordi asked Worf to fix something in the warp core and Worf accidentally broke something off and was like "oh shit" and just replaced it with a knife. That's not very Worf-like, actually. A better story is that BARCLAY broke something accidentally and then stole the knife from Worf's quarters and used it to MacGyver the engine. There. Better.

So Data thinks he's awake, but then this happens:

Listen to your heart / when it's calling for you

So that's...weird.

It turns out Data's dream program has gone pretty much haywire and he's drifting into a dream state without realizing it and yadda yadda yadda, he stabs Troi in the shoulder...the right shoulder! From before!! When she was a cake!!!

Rude!!!!!

It's not great that Troi got stabbed, BUT we do get a little extra fashion from her stay in sickbay:

Fashion Johnny

I'm kind of feeling this horizontal knit corduroy situation here. What I'm wondering is - how does that shoulder seam reattach? I don't see snaps or buttons or velcro, so I'm forced to conclude that it is a magnet. I'm in the middle of making a shirt and I'm wondering if I could use magnets instead of buttons. ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT.

Data is worried that he will hurt Spot (aww) because of his dream hallucinations, so he asks Worf to cat-sit, leading to this delightful image:

"I will feed him."

Let's just see that from another angle, because it's delightful.

He is a good cat and a pretty cat

Side note: @Spiggitzfan on Twitter made this adorable Data + Spot and then OMG THIS ACTUAL BABY KITTEN SAT ON IT AND I DIED.

😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭 😭

At this point, Beverly figures out that the thing causing the issues on the ship are these interphasic creatures who eat cellular peptide (that’s what the dream cake was made out of!!!!), and you can only see them with this special light:

Later they shined this light in Riker's quarters and it was like a Jackson Pollock piece

To fix the issue, the crew hooks Data’s brain up to the Holodeck so they can go into his dream. Sure. They see CakeTroi again:

How does her hair look so good even when she is a cake

I bet that black frosting was hard to create. Actually, that blue is so dark I bet that was tough, too. Let's give it up for the art department.

Geordi and Picard tool around in Data's dream for a while, and those miners from before come back:

Miner Catastrophe, the new line from Zara Man

I didn't even notice that one guy's mustard pants earlier. That is a bold pant choice that I respect.

Somehow the "going into Data's dream" plan fixes everything, and all is back to normal. Spot is being a regular cat:

Cat toy technology has not changed

And Troi brings Data a cake of himself as a joke:

Black and mustard, the two most delicious-looking frosting colors

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, AMERICANS!!

[pinkbiscuits-perks-and-curses]

this is a year by year telling of my life, it is by no means complete and only lists what i want out there yet is probably not suited for everyone, check the tags and please don't over react

(i have a terrible sense of time and almost everything is an approximation of the time it happened, this post is also very long)

2001: October 4th: the day of my birth, born as the second child to two people that didn't want any kids, (but hey, they had been together for 13 years, never used any contraception and only had 2 kids 9 years apart, pretty good odds if you ask me) i was born 3 weeks to early, had a misshapen ear, sported a full head of black hair and had bright blue eyes

2001 -2004: normal baby stuff, my dad got a vasectomy (don't want a third unexpected child), my black hair fell out and blonde hair grew in it's place, eyes became less bright (life never set well with me, so no surprise there)

2004-2007: kinder garden was pretty normal, i wasn't allowed to ride a bike because i was shit at it, so my mom had to drive, i was bullied a bit, made friends, the normal things

2007-2008: changed schools to start basic school, made new friends, learned how to read and how to write, never in a good way however since my handwriting is shit,

this is also the time where the concept of death started to make sense to me, now normally that wouldn't have been a problem, but my parents where very much spiritualists, not to mention never really teaching me anything i wasn't required to know, being of the mind set that letting a child learn it themselves allows them to express themselves how they want, (this probably came from the fact both my parents were sheltered as children not having much freedom), however i was a child that needed support, i wasn't given that by my parents so my grandfather tried to see if he could help, but it was to no avail, at the moment my grandfather realised i had already developed abandonment issues

now, the way i saw death was as a form of separation, they weren't gone, they where simply on a different realm of existence, (spiritualism 101), this made me think of death as a form of abandonment, this fucked with what i perceived as life, making it so i believed the meaning of it was to let go, this pretty much made me feel alone at all times to a point i had night terrors of my family abandoning me, but remember abandonment was pretty much equal to death for me at that point, i had night terrors on a weekly basis for a rough 5 years, still having them occasionally now

2008-2013: the rest of basic school, pretty normal all things considered, hair became brown, however patchy, meaning i had brown hair in certain places and blond in most others, so my family decided to dye my hair an even shade of brown until it became brown completely when i was around 10, my eyes became more greyish,

at school everything was fine, a bit isolated because of my personality and the fact i was rather tall, but i always had some friends

i should mention that my parents took me to the bar ever since i was like 3, but this is when i became aware that it wasn't such a normal thing, my parents where acrobatic dancers performing once a week as practise, this was at the back of a bar so it was kinda inevitable, it just became a habit to bring me and my sister along, even if it wasn't for a performance, my sister eventually started practising herself, i was an introvert, so this constant public interaction kind of clashed with me, but it was not a bad thing, just grew up that way and ended up being rather socially out going even though i still prefer being alone

was nearly choked to death by someone because "i was being a brat", don't remember when exactly but should've been around age 8 or 9

my adoptive grandpa died, even though he lived with me at home, i never really had much of a connection with him, however i did see my father and uncle carry his corpse down the stairs, so that was another experience

started swimming as hobby, around age 9 i started being forwarded into competitive swimming, however this made me incredibly stressed, basically i had no free time, i had swimming practise Wednesday evening and on Saturday, i would visit my maternal grandparents on Sunday, and Friday evening i would be in a bar with my parents, so i stopped swimming around age 13

i started drinking alcohol on a weekly basis since around age 8, my grandparents would give me a glass of wine when we came to visit, my parents would give me alcohol as well, i distinctly remember having a bottle of a type of pasoa in the fridge that i would mix with my fruit juice and drink while watching tv,

2013-2015: started high school, very new, very stressful, but alright, puberty was in full swing, started coming to school using a bike to disastrous results (scars for days) was still swimming at this point so i had no free time, was allowed to stay at home more often and no longer had a fixed bed time, but since i had a ton of homework and had to wake up early every day it changed very little about my life

started becoming more self reliant, started doing less for school, and just lazed around more but never in a way that was obvious. realised i was bisexual.

my sister's boyfriend started living with us

a peaceful time not much happened that is noteworthy, the calm before the storm as you will find out.

2015-2016: my house burned down, no one was injured, yet when this happened i was on a school trip, so that was the first thing i was faced with the moment i came back, i lucky thing in disguise, because this meant that i still had some of my clothes.

luckily for me and my family we owned a second house, a shoe store my family runs, so me, my sister, her boyfriend, my parents, and my grandparents lived in this house that was just large enough, my uncle and aunt moved to another house owned by my aunts parents.

this made me depressed as shit, i no longer did anything for school, started sleeping every moment i could, became suicidal, and started separating myself from my family

so i started drinking, a lot, it was always in the house and as long as i was smart about it and took only a little from each bottle, then my parents wouldn't notice, this became worse over time, mostly because the alcohol actually helped me get my thoughts together, but soon enough i was not content with just drinking every now and then, and so i started sneaking out of the house to get drunk, and this lasted for 2 maybe 3 months and then what little money i had was gone

at this moment i would still sneak out, i would try and get people i knew to buy me a drink, many did, and this got me in contact with people i shouldn't have had contact with, i started doing odd jobs at first, cleaning, going to the store, doing laundry, even cooking, however it soon became quite clear that i needed money

people were all to keen on having me do work, and then it happened, a friend of mine introduced me to two people, they needed someone that knew a lot of people, and i knew almost everyone at that point, so i became a drug dealer, well, more of a delivery boy, i would get stuff from point A to point B discreetly, i mean who suspects a 15 year old boy on a bike to be carrying an entire backpack full of drugs.

a lot of shit happened in this time, but to sum it up, i got to know my 2 "employers" and actually became friend with them, this would get me better jobs, and eventually i would not even have to do any as they just paid for my share when we where out an about anyway, basically they adopted me,

2016-2018: okay, so here it gets a little muddled, mostly because i wasn't in a state to remember things, i want to mention that i still went to school almost daily, mostly showing up drunk or high, but i never actually skipped school in a meaningful way, even though i was late nearly every day

i went to the hospital because i had drank myself into a coma, no surprise there it was bound to happen, but it became a bit more problematic i was diagnosed with a rare type of blood disorder, requiring me to take medication, medication that if taken with alcohol have some serious side effects, not taking the meds would put my organs under pressure risking internal bleeding, so i had a choice stop drinking or not take the meds risking my life in the process

so i stopped drinking as much as i was capable of, now by this time i had already started smoking, both tobacco and weed, and doing drugs like lsd and schrooms, (never did hard drugs, i saw pretty early on what happens when you do so i stayed clear of them), so even though i (mostly) stopped drinking, i was still having the same life

and so it came, a big chance, a big job, we would smuggle a large amount of cocaine over the German border, this was not the first time we did such a job, but this was the first time it was Germany, a country who's border is a bit less open, yet we thought nothing of it, it wasn't the first time and no way we could get caught that easily

but big surprise we got caught, and i was fucked, there was no escape from this, i was arrested before sure, but i was a minor so i was let go, but this was no underage drinking, or plain vandalism, so i did the only thing i could even think of getting out of this

a lot of the jobs we did, and especially i did, where ordered from the port mafia, i never did anything mayor, but i knew that they always needed more people, so i asked them for help, and fucking got it, they would get me out of the shit, and i would be in debt, it did help that i wasn't short on money during this time doing all of this, but it wasn't enough

so i worked for them, for 2 years, i did whatever they told me to pay off my debt, i don't like going into detail what i did, but basically i would clean up, do odd jobs, and transport stuff, again no one really suspects a 15 year old on a bike with a backpack, clean up was the worst, you either had to scrub blood from walls, floors and clothes, or you had to get rid of things, burn them, bury them, just get rid of em, seen my fair share of shit working for those fuckers, but no complaining while you're the one that owes them money

anyway, during this time my sister got married, my old house was rebuilt and my family moved back, later my sister had her first child

2019: i got arrested for the last time on drug possession and was let go after disclosing the names of several people i had worked with in the past, all of which were bastard i would deck in the face if i were to ever see them gain

after that cut as many connections with that part of the law as i could, and tried to get my life in order, this was a lot of trouble, and i will not talk about it, because it costed me things which might not have been worth it

finished high school, i don't know how either

decided to spend more time with certain friends

2020-2021: started college in 2020, and dropped out in 2021

sister had her second child

started this blog as a form of therapy

started redecorating the garden, buying a trampoline and a swimming pool

started a relationship with one very much in the closet himbo

changed medication and (mostly) stopped smoking,

things that either don't fit a specific time or are more anecdotal:

my family went on vacation almost every year from 2001 to 20012, i've been to many countries, all of them were nice but nothing really happened just family time

the relationship between me and my parents has gotten better since i was a child, and even though they didn't teach me a lot of things i might have liked them to, i know now that this wasn't done because they didn't care but because they wanted me to have the freedom they never had

my family has owned many pets throughout the years such as: horses, dogs, cats, chickens, pheasants, parakeets, peacocks, and cranes

my family's internal relationships have been weird throughout the years, my aunt and uncle weren't officially married until 2019, all 4 of my grandparents are alive, yet for a time a i had a 5th one, this is do to my father, uncle, and aunt being adopted because of the inheritance of the man my grandmother was having an affair with, this is the reason i have 2 last names, yet my grandmother and grandfather are still together now, this affair was very much open as well

my blood disorder is very complicated, it makes it so my blood is either to viscous or too liquid, when too viscous my heart needs to pump harder, this can sometime cause my blood pressure to be high enough to rupture small veins, and when too liquid it can force my heart to beat unnaturally fast yet still incapable of putting my blood under enough pressure, causing a lack of oxygen, my medication can only dampen this and not stop this completely, my given lifespan if nothing changes should be 45-50

i went to therapy between 2015 and 2019, yes, while i was working for the mob and being an alcoholic i went to therapy, i've had 3 different psychologists and they have helped me process a lot of things

both my original house and the shoe store are believed to be haunted, my family are spiritualists so this is not out of the norm

in 2017 i had a 3 month relationship with a British woman who cheated on me with a friend of mine, she was not aware that she was my girlfriend at the time and was the first one to tell me

all of the criminal information in this post is known by the police of my country

you can ask questions if you want

[fridayweed]

I Passed a Pre-Employment Follicle Test Hey, I don't know if this is exactly the right subreddit for this post, but I figured I'd share my experience passing a pre-employment drug screening which included a follicle test done by Quest Diagnostics. I live in the Deep South of the United States and I was offered a pretty great job at a pretty high profile company, the only major catch that I didn't expect was the requirement of a hair follicle test, the test included marijuana, cocaine, PCP, opiates, and methamphetamine.I am a habitual smoker of pot, so I thought I was fucked. A follicle test goes back at least 90 days if not more and I had smoked heavily every day for months prior to the interview. Reading online gave me a ton of mixed information on products, home remedies, and from what I can now assume is false information put out their by these drug testing facilities to deter people from attempting to beat follicle tests, in order to keep their industry alive. Claiming that none of these work and that follicle tests are 99% accurate and unbeatable. Which they're not.So I'm going to layout exactly what I did step by step, I will admit that I probably tried too many things to rid my hair of the thc metabolites than I needed too, but it worked so.. If you want to make sure you pass follow my instructions.Here is how you beat a follicle test:-Clean your hair as you would regularly-Dry your hair with hair dryer-Soak your hair with lemon juice-work seasalt into your lemon juice soaked hair until the majority of the crystals dissolve-Place plastic hair cap over head for one hour, whenever you feel like it is drying out repeat the processes.-Wash the mixture out of your hair with water -Dry hair with hair drier-Pour white vinegar over your hair and massage it into your scalp-Place a new plastic hair cap over your head and wait 40 minutes-Whenever you feel like a part is dry repeat step-Leave vinegar in your hair and add salicylic acid acne treatment (look at the active ingredients for 2% or more salicylic acid)-Work the mixture into your scalp-Put a new plastic hair cap on and wait 40 minutes-While keeping the mixture of vinegar and salicylic acid in your hair work a capfull of liquid detergent (I used Tide)-Mix a half cup full of powder detergent (I used Tide again) with a bit of water (until pasty) and work that mixture into your scalp-Put on a new plastic hair cap and wait one hour-Wash hair completely with V05 shampoo or a soap based body wash (don't use good shampoo or anything with a conditioner added)-Get a box or two (depending on how dark / thick your hair is) of the most platinum blonde bleach you can find, and a box of hair dye that best matched your original hair color.-Get a roommate or friend to work the bleach using rubber gloves into your hair and your scalp (it will hurt) but you need to work it into the scalp-Put on a new plastic hair cap and follow the timed instructions on the box-Repeat this step until your hair has evenly lost its original pigment-Wash hair with V05-Dry hair with hair drier-Get your roommate or friend to apply the box hair dye with rubber gloves, all the way down to the scalp (it will hurt)-Put a new plastic hair cap on and follow the timed instructions on the box-Repeat step until your color is even-Wash hair with water and the special conditioner that was likely given to you with either the bleach or the boxes hair dye.-Next day wash hair with the V05 shampoo and use the special conditioner again.-Take the follicle test #Weed #Cannabis #Marijuana #Ganja #tumblr http://ift.tt/2ABhihn