#pretty proud of myself for editing these but owie my hand
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maythegnome · 24 days ago
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Hey, here's some random Genshin screenshots I took myself! I got inspired to do this from @kojinxshi's #AllAroundTeyvat tag :D
There isnt a theme so it's just a bunch of random ones tho lol And I also edited out the logo so they look nicer!
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Ochkanatlan
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Hypostyle Desert + Pyramid Entrance
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Liyue Chasm Mines
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Nameless Ruins Upside-down Pool
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Seirai Island Sunset + Storm
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snowdice · 4 years ago
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Finding the Time to Study Fic 2 [Day 33]
Here is my starting post for today’s study break stories session. See this post for more details and feel free to send me asks to keep me going! It’s been a lot of fun so far! I will reblog this post with the story as I write them today. I’ll be constantly looking for ideas of times and places for Janus to have missions, so feel free to send in any you can think of at any point!
If you are a new follower or just don’t want all of these posts clogging your dash, please feel free to block the tag “study break stories” as all posts and voting about it will go there. You can still see the finished product of the story even if you are blocking that tag as I will not tag the edited chapters with “study break stories” but with the tag “folds in paper.” See edited chapters below. None edited chapters are under the cut.
My Masterpost Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11
I also have a playlist on youtube (because Spotify didn’t have one of the songs I wanted). It’s short, and not really for serious listening, but I had fun with it.
Alright, here we go again!
Chapter 12
There was something off about his readings. Clearly the time distortion was starting to pull at this place with the way the weather was flickering between storming and sunny, but he still couldn’t quite pinpoint the exact location of the source of it. He could, however, get that it must be somewhere on this side of the river more into the downtown area, so that’s the way he was walking, Pat close on his heels.
“What’s your name, by the way?” he asked.
Janus shot him a glare. “Elvis Presley,” he said.
Pat frowned, clearly knowing who that was. “There’s no reason to be mean.”
 “You did it to me first.”
“…Introduced myself as a famous musician?” he asked. Janus didn’t respond, and after a moment, Pat laughed lightly. “You really don’t understand time travel, do you?”
“Oh, yeah,” Janus said. “Name the three types of time distortions.”
“Just because I don’t know the names of things doesn’t mean I don’t understand them.” He stuck out his tongue. Janus was dealing with an actual toddler. “Unlike you who has a bunch of fancy words, but just caused a time loop.”
Janus scoffed. “I did not just cause a time loop.”
“Maybe not a big one,” Pat agreed, “but you did.”
 Janus raised an eyebrow. “I’ve never introduced myself to you with a musician’s name, but now you’ve told me that I will. So, at some point in the future I will have to, thereby making you think to say that now. Time loop.”
“That’s not… that doesn’t count.”
“Does too,” Pat claimed. “Like I have said once before and you may or may not have heard me say before, anything you do to me to get back at me for something I haven’t done yet, just causes whatever that is to happen in the first place.”
“But you’re still going to do it.”
 “Then take it up with future me. I haven’t done anything to you.” Then he paused and sighed. “…Which I guess means you’ve done nothing to me.” He seemed to mull this concept over for a long moment. “Well you were a bit crabby about me not knowing what a time distortion was, but I can forgive you for that.”
“And I’m supposed to forgive you?”
“Like I said,” Pat said. “I haven’t done anything yet.”
“You also haven’t done anything to endear yourself to me either,” Janus grumbled.
“Hmm,” Pat said. “Fine.” He pulled something out of his pocket. “You’re obviously not having much luck finding whatever you’re looking for. Tell me what it is and I’ll help.”
Janus squinted at what was in his hand. “Is that… an iPhone 5?”
“No!” he said. “It’s super-secret time travel tech disguised as an iPhone 5!”
“We’re in 2027,” Janus said. “Not a great disguise. Those things have been obsolete for a decade.”
“Well I’ll keep in mind to have my tech disguised as phones from the right year next time,” Pat said, sticking out his tongue. “Now what are we looking for?”
“If my timepiece can’t find it, I’m certain yours can’t.”
 Pat rolled his eyes and tapped on the device’s screen a couple of times. “I’m going to guess it’s that,” he said proudly.
Janus leaned over to look at the screen. “Are you using google maps?” he sputtered.
“It integrates time relevant data like traffic conditions and local weather warnings with time travel technology,” Pat explained. “Something seems to be going on in a museum a couple of blocks that way.”
“I…” Janus said. That was actually a really good idea, usually unnecessary with scouts observing that data beforehand, and Janus wasn’t sure how good the accuracy would be considering whatever was taking it into account was automated, but still a good idea. “Well, I guess since we have no other leads, we can check it out.”
 Pat looked far too proud for having only used a piece of tech that hadn’t even been confirmed as accurate. “Then, let’s go,” he said right as a chilly wind started to pick up and a couple of snowflakes began to fall around them. “Before that gets worse…”
Janus let Pat lead with his iPhone. Janus’s timepiece still wasn’t picking up a clear signal for some reason, but it seemed to point in the same general direction as Pat’s. Strangely though, as they got closer to their destination, the signal started to get fuzzier. Pat’s tech seemed unaffected leading them closer to the museum.
 When they got to the Musée Fabre museum, Janus stopped. “What?” Pat asked. He was shivering slightly in the cold and holding his arms around himself.
“My timepiece stopped working completely,” he said.
“I’m assuming that’s weird?” Pat said.
“It is,” Janus confirmed, turning to squint at him suspiciously. “How do I know you’re not the one doing it?”
“If I was doing it, wouldn’t I have just knocked it out from the get go?” Pat questioned.
Janus pursed his lips. “I don’t know,” he said. “Would you have? Maybe it’s a trick.”
Pat’s eyes narrowed a bit on him. “Think what you want, but I’m freezing. Come in with me if you want.”
 He dithered from a few moments before following Pat inside. Pat had already struck up a conversation with the woman charging admission into art museum. She was looking at him, her brow knit as he spoke. Janus nudged him away from her getting a confused glance from him in return. He shot a smile at the woman.
“Two adult passes for the museum and the Hotel Sabatier d’Espevran, please,” he said, placing down 14 euro.
“Ah,” she said, still looking at Pat oddly. “Yes sir.” She gave them the passes and Janus quickly shuffled Pat away.
“What is wrong with your French?” he hissed once they were out of earshot.
 “What?” he asked, bewildered.
“You sound like you’re reading Le Comte de Monte-Cristo. No one talks like that anymore.”
“I’m a little rusty,” Pat defended himself.
“Two centuries?” Janus asked. Pat stuck his tongue out like a child once again. “Is that your only way to respond to legitimate criticism?”
“What does it even matter anyway? No one ever expects time travel, at least not for something so silly.”
“It’s not silly,” Janus said. “It’s a legitimate issue. The wrong person who’s watched too much science fiction notices and you’re putting the timeline at risk. Not to mention if there are other time travelers around that aren’t as nice as me.”
 “Are there a lot of time travelers around?” Pat asked, sounding intrigued.
“There are plenty, both legal and not.”
“Huh,” he said, “but what are the chances we’ll run into another one?”
“Considering the time distortion? There could be many. Opportunists wanting to capitalize off the chaos, people trying to stop it, like me, and not to mention the person who caused it.”
“Wait, someone made it happen?” Pat asked.
“These things don’t just happen naturally.”
“Huh. So, something like this has to be caused by a person?”
“Yes,” Janus said. “…Why?”
Pat smiled. “No reason. I think we should head upstairs. Whatever I’m picking up says it’s around here, but I don’t see anything. Maybe it’s a floor or two above us.”
“Which is why it’s ridiculous to use Google Maps.”
 “Would you rather use yours?” he asked sweetly.
“I’m still not convinced it’s not your doing,” Janus growled. “Why does your tech still work when mine doesn’t?”
“Probably the same reason the ring did,” he muttered.
“What?”
“What?”
“You may be the most aggravating being in the universe.”
Pat glanced at him with a bit of a smirk. “I can’t tell you,” he said. “It would be a much bigger risk to the timeline than me speaking in French from the 1830s. But, I’m pretty sure the reason mine still works is just a software difference.”
“What the hell do you mean a software difference?”
 Pat opened his mouth, doubtlessly to supply him with yet another frustratingly cheeky and unhelpful answer. Yet, Pat did not have a chance to do so as, just as Janus stepped onto the second floor of the museum, the ground started to violently shake. Janus tried to turn to catch Pat as the other man’s foot slipped on the last step, but he couldn’t do so in time. Pat fell onto his hands and knees, sliding back a few steps and smacking his face into the stairs hard once and then a couple of times more after that as he slid.
 Chapter 13
The room stopped shaking after a moment. “Ow,” Pat said. He seemed a bit stunned but was still moving at least. He carefully maneuvered himself into a seating position. “Ouch. Owie.” He reached up to poke his own nose. “Ow!” Janus slapped his hand away when he got there. A bit of blood was already trickling from his nose and there was a small cut over his eye, but it wasn’t bleeding too much.
Janus pushed him so he was leaning slightly forward and produced a pack of time appropriate tissues from his pocket. He pulled one out of the package and offered it to him.
 He took it and pressed it up against his nose to try to stop the bleeding. He seemed mostly alright though Janus imagined he’d have plenty of bruises down the line. The power in the museum flickered and Janus looked up. Now that he was listening, he could hear people panicking in and out of the museum.
“We should probably get off of the stairs,” he suggested.
“Yeah,” Pat agreed. Janus helped him to his feet, and they climbed back up the steps. Janus looked around and found an employees only sign a few feet away. Usually he’d not risk that as it could get him into trouble he didn’t want to be in, but considering the earthquake that had just happened, he could probably play it off as panic.
 He ushered Pat into a small room and found a chair and table. He had Pat sit in the chair and pulled out another one of the tissues to dab at the blood coming from the cut over his eyes. “Here,” he said. “Hold that there. I’m going to go see if there are any bandages about.”
Pat took the tissue with the hand not already holding one to his nose. “Thanks,” he said.
Janus nodded and got to his feet. The lights flickered once again but didn’t stay off for now. He didn’t know how long that would last.
 He couldn’t see anything that might hold bandages in this room, but there was a second door. “I’ll be right back,” he told Pat, exiting through it.
The lights flickered once more as the door closed behind him and he cursed. When they came back up Janus’s eyes immediately fell on a man. They both froze.
“Remus!” Janus hissed the second their eyes met. “What are you doing here?”
Remus blinked at him for a moment. “Hi. Janus,” he said. “I… come to France for… tea sometimes?”
“There isn’t any tea back here.”
“So, there isn’t…” he said. There was a moment of silence. “Uh, so I actually cannot talk to you right now.”
 “What do you mean?” Janus asked. Remus grimaced in a way Janus had never seen from him before. It immediately set off alarm bells in Janus’s head. “Oh my god,” Janus said. “Oh my god. You’re not from the same time as me.”
“Oh, you have no idea,” Remus mumbled.
“Holy shit, you’re looping?!”
“It’s… not looping if I wasn’t here the first time.”
“Remus, we spend more than 12 hours a day together most of the time. The only thing worse than this is if I looped back to this time myself.”
“…Yeah. Anyway, I need to leave now.”
“Please do.”
 He turned to go, but then stopped. “Oh, and,” he reached into his pocket and tossed something at Janus. Janus caught it.
It was Band-Aids.
“Oh, shit,” Janus spat at the clear use of foreknowledge. “I hate this. I hate you. I’m going to kill you the next time you see me.”
“Sure, Jan.”
“Go.”
He did, slipping into the next room while Janus took a deep breath and then turned back to the door behind him. He schooled his face before Pat looked up. “I found some Band-Aids.”
Pat nodded and Janus came over to squat next to him.
 Janus opened the box and Pat looked down. His eyes lit up with sudden joy so intense that Janus felt like he’d just gotten a punch to the gut. “Kitty Band-Aids!” he exclaimed. Janus bothered to actually look at the design on the container, only to note the cartoon cats on the front. Pat was almost vibrating off his seat. “Look they’re all so cute!” He grabbed the container from him to inspect the different designs printed on the back with glee even as a bit of blood was still trickling from his nose.
Janus took the box back gently and guided the wad of bloody Kleenexes back to his nose.
 “Which would you like?” Janus asked.
“Oh, they are all so cute,” Pat cooed. “Um, how about that one!” he pointed. “Or that one! Or that one!”
“Pat you only have one cut.”
“But they’re all so cute!” Pat said, tongue tucking into his cheek. He contemplated the box again. “Let’s do the black one,” he finally settled on.
Janus selected one of the Band-Aids with a black cat wrapped around a pink ball of yarn and staring back at them with wide green eyes. The think looked like it had partaken in one two many doses of catnip, but Janus didn’t mention that.
 Instead, he just carefully unstuck the backing from the Band-Aid and motioned for Pat to remove the tissue from his forehead. He smiled at Janus as he drew back.
Janus cleared his throat. “How’s the nose.”
“It’s slowing down,” Pat replied. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” Janus replied. They met eyes for a second before Pat looked away back at the box of Band-Aids.
“Oh,” Pat said. “There’s a grey one. I didn’t notice.” He pointed to it. “I should have used that one.”
“Do you like grey cats?” Janus asked.
“I like all kitties,” he said, “but one of my roommates loves grey cats. He had one when he was a kid and thinks of them as good omens. Seeing one always brightens up his day.”
“A friend of mine has a grey cat,” Janus said. “She’s much more tolerable than him.”
Pat laughed a bit. “Don’t be mean,” he said.
“Oh, he deserves it, don’t worry.” Janus considered him for a moment. “Here,” he said, pulling out one of the Band-Aids with the grey cat on it. It did, actually, look a lot like Diesel Fuel.
“But I don’t…”
Janus just shrugged and stuck it on his cheek where there was no wound. Pat giggled and touched it with a finger. Janus stood back up.
“Can I have another tissue?” Pat asked.
“Sure.” Janus handed a tissue over to him and he crumpled up the bloody ones in his hand.
“I think I’m good to keep going,” Pat said, putting the new tissue under his nose. “The nose will stop soon.”
 Pat got out his iPhone and directed him back out of the room. They checked the second floor and didn’t find anything and so went to the third floor. The second they arrived in the room that Pat’s phone was directing them too, Janus knew that it must be right. There was a strange, distorted whirling sound and the entire room was shaking slightly like they were standing next to a railroad track.
“I’m guessing this is it,” Pat said.
Janus nodded and looked over his shoulder at the screen. They both cautiously walked towards where the little dot was on the phone.
 “Is that it?” Pat asked, pointing at a small device on the center column in the room. Janus reached forward to flip the switch on it. The whirling stopped and the room settled. Janus’s time piece vibrated as it came back online. They waited for a few moments. “I assumed… time distortions would be more…”
“They are,” Janus said. “This one is artificial.”
“What does that mean?”
“It’s a simulation,” Janus said. “It causes similar symptoms to a time distortion, but it’s not actually fracturing time at all.”
“That’s good, isn’t it?” Pat asked.
“I don’t know,” Janus said. He took the piece of tech of the wall and carefully stored it in his pocket, “but someone’s trying to get our attention.”
 Chapter 14
Janus didn’t feel comfortable leaving France 2027 just yet, still weirded out by the strange turn of events. So, he and Pat ended up sticking around for a couple of hours. They looked through the art museum for a bit, but Janus was having trouble focusing on the pieces, and Pat eventually suggested they get some air. Janus agreed considering the museum would close for the night soon anyway.
They wandered around the downtown for a bit. The people seemed to jump back from the strange weather and earthquake that afternoon rather quickly, and there were plenty still about to blend into.
 Pat was snapping photos every so often like a tourist which Janus shook his head at but allowed because even with the outdated phone it almost made them blend in even more. It also might stop any questions about Pat’s weird way of speaking French. They could just say he was an overeager tourist who watched too many old movies.
“Ooo!” Pat said. “We should get crepes.”
“Why?”
“You can’t go to France and not eat crepes.”
“I assure you, you can,” Janus said dryly.
Pat shot a pout at him and the next thing he knew he was in a small crepe shop.
 For Janus, choosing something was easy. He just ordered the first thing he found on the menu which seemed to be a standard one with ham and eggs. Pat on the other hand seemed to be struggling greatly, and Janus had to gently push him to the side to let some other customers order first.
“What should I get!?” Pat asked. “They all look so good! I could do strawberry preserves or maple syrup or just sugar!”
“Or you could get one that is actually food,” Janus suggested mildly. “I don’t think you need any more sugar judging by how you are acting.”
Pat rolled his eyes. “You sound like Lo.”
 Janus made a note of the name ‘Lo’ even though it surely was a nickname.
“But, since you’re insisting, I’ll get something healthy. I’ll have the strawberry one. That’s a fruit!”
“It comes with a cream cheese filling,” Janus pointed out.
“And it’s fruit!”
Janus shook his head and stepped up to the counter. “One ham and cheese and one strawberry preserve, please,” he said to the cashier as he was not allowing Pat to order in French and accidently say something stupid. He forked over some euros.
“You don’t have to pay for me,” Pat protested when he saw that.
Janus glanced back at him. “I was afraid you’d try to pay in francs,” he said dryly.
 It looked like Pat was about to stick his tongue out at him, remembered that Janus had criticized him for that earlier, and then just scrunched up his face in displeasure as though that was any less childish.
They waited for their crepes to be finished and then went to eat them outside near a water fountain.
“I can pay you back for the crepe,” Pat said after they sat down. “I do actually have euros.”
Janus waved him off. “It wasn’t that expensive.”
Pat hummed. “Well, in that case. I insist on paying for a wish for you.” Janus raised an eyebrow. “In the fountain!” Pat clarified.
 Pat set aside his crepe to dig in his pocket for a couple of coins. “Here!” he said handing one over.
Janus glanced over at the fountain. “No.”
“Oh, come on,” Pat beseeched. “You have to want something. I’ll even throw it in for you, but you have to make a wish first!”
“No.”
“Please!”
Janus sighed. “Fine.” He popped the rest of his crepe in his mouth. “I wish for a crepe,” he said after swallowing.
“You just had a crepe, silly.”
“But I liked it, so I want another one.”
“We can go back and get you another crepe.”
“Ah, but I’m not hungry anymore.”
Pat crossed his arms. “You’re just being difficult on purpose.”
 “Not me,” Janus said putting hand over his heart. “I would never do something like that.”
 Pat glared at him, but then snatched the coin out of his hand. “Fine!” he said. “One crepe wish coming right up.” He hopped up with the two coins and darted over to the water fountain. Janus turned to watch him go but then happened to catch sight of something out of the corner of his eyes.
Pat’s phone.
He didn’t pause in his movement, completing the turn, but as he watched Pat close his eyes, presumably to focus on his own wish, Janus snuck a hand out and grabbed the phone without looking. He slipped it into his own pocket.
 Pat came back over after throwing both coins in the fountain and didn’t even seem to notice that his phone was missing, picking up his crepe to take another bite. Just to make sure, though Janus decided to distract him. “What do you think of your crepe?” Janus asked.
“I like it! It’s sweet, but not too sweet. There was a crepe place across the street from my apartment in college, but they always put a bit too much sugar in the dough, I think. I’d still eat them, but these are much better.”
Janus nodded and kept up the light conversation until Pat was finished.
21088
“Well,” he said then, getting to his feet. “It seems that nothing else is going to happen regarding the time distortion. I should be getting back.”
Pat hummed. “I should too. It’s movie night!”
“I probably should arrest you,” Janus noted.
“In the middle of all of these people?” Pat asked mildly.
“Touché,” Janus said.
Pat gasped and pointed at him. “Pun!” he said. Janus blinked at him. “Because we’re in France! That’s French!”
“…Goodbye Pat,” Janus said, turning to walk away from him.
“Goodbye… wait I still don’t know your name!”
Janus stopped to look back at him for a moment. “Like I said,” he replied. “Elvis.”
“Fine,” Pat said. “Au revoir, mon chéri.”
“You never stop, do you?” Janus asked.
Pat giggled. “Considering I don’t know what you mean, I imagine I’m just getting started.”
Janus actually left then, walking off towards the alley he’d first arrived in. In some ways, the mission had been a bust, but in others it had gone very well.
He felt for the weight of the phone in his pocket before pulling up the display screen on his timepiece to go back to the TPI.
It had gone very well indeed.
 Chapter 15
The first thing Janus had done when he’d returned to the TPI was hand over the timebomb to Khalid who sent it to forensics. Within the hour, forensics got back to them that it was the same timebomb as 2999 and that it had never exploded, but simply been diffused. Which meant, blessings on blessings, everyone got to go home that night.
 Not that Janus went home, no, he ended up falling asleep on his desk somewhere between 3 and 4am, but at least he wasn’t sharing his space with anyone. He’d been trying to hack the cell phone all night to see if it had anything he could use, but he honestly had no idea what he was doing. All it seemed he could do was play some annoying song over and over again about never giving someone up. At around 2am, he’d finally broken and sent off an email, though, he’d continued to try to mess with it after that.
 He got woken up by Lena coming into the office at 7am, and noticed he already had an email response asking when Janus wanted to come in.
“Now?” he sent back.
“…Do you sleep?” was the immediate response. “And yes.”
His wrist buzzed as an appointment in 5 seconds downloaded to his timepiece. He selected the coordinates and landed at Cultural Outreach. The receptionist blinked up at him and then back down at the screen on his desk. “Oh!” he said. “I didn’t see this appointment. I think Professor Eran is in his office.”
He didn’t stand to escort Janus this time, so Janus went ahead and went down the hall to Virgil’s office himself.
 He knocked on the door and while he was waiting for Virgil to open it, the infernal contraption once again started to play the same stupid song.
“I didn’t even touch you!” he spat, getting it out and tapping on the screen.
“Jonas Brothers dude again?” Virgil asked causally upon opening the door.
Janus shoved it at him. “Make it stop.”
Virgil took it and fiddled with it for a few moments before it stopped with the song. “Oh my gosh,” he said scrolling through something on the screen.
“What.”
“What maniac sets a custom alarm for every 30-60 minutes for a week that just plays ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’? Oh, and one ‘It’s Not Unusual’ on Saturday. He’s mixing memes at an alarming rate.”
 “Can you. Just. Make it not happen. Anymore?”
Virgil smirked at him. “Maybe.” He turned around to go back into his office.
“Virgil,” Janus growled following him in.
Virgil just laughed. “What do you want to know about it?” he asked. “Just a fair warning… the song means he… likely was aware someone would steal it.”
“Of course, he was,” Janus groaned.
“But I’m sure we can still get something out of it.” Virgil started tapping at the screen again. “Okay, let’s see. It’s an iPhone 5, and someone jailbroke it.”
“What does that mean?”
“Tampered with it so they could install non-company approved software,” Virgil explained.
“Well I figured that since he was using Google Maps to track time distortions,” Janus grumbled.
 “I think I have something,” Virgil said to himself while digging through his desk. “Ah ha!” He held up some sort of cord. “This will let me hook it up to my integrator.” He slotted the cord into the bottom of the iPhone and then crawled under his desk to fiddle around with some other things. “There we go,” Virgil said popping back up. “It might take a few minutes. Running the program any faster might overheat the phone.”
Janus nodded and sat back to wait. Virgil grabbed the phone and started to play around with it a bit even as it uploaded all of its information to his computer.
“Weird,” Virgil said after a moment.
“What?” Janus asked, sitting up straighter.
“There are exactly two contacts. Fewer than I’d anticipate for a regular phone from the 2010s. More than I would expect from one clearly not being used as a phone.
 Virgil glanced to the side, and it must have finished the download because he unhooked it from the computer. “I have a 21st century phone network adapter,” Virgil said. “It transfers call back to whatever date the phone says. Do you want to try calling one?”
“It’s worth a shot,” Janus replied.
Virgil dug back into his desk for a small device that he plugged into the same port he’d plugged the earlier cord. “Okay, which contact do you want to try first?” he asked. “One has ‘Ro’ with a crown, red heart, and a gold star emoji. The other has “Lo” with a book, blue heart, and Milky Way emoji.”
 “He mentioned a Lo,” Janus said. “So, try him first.”
Virgil nodded. “I’ll put it on speaker.” He pressed some buttons before setting the phone on the desk between them.
The phone rang three times before with a bit of a crackle, it was answered. “Salutations,” a voice said, voice sounding a bit scratchy as though he had only just gotten up.
Virgil motioned with his head for Janus to speak. “Are you ‘Lo’?” he asked.
The man hummed. “To some people.”
Janus… didn’t quite know what to say to that, or even what questions he should ask.
“I’m assuming you’re the man that stole my associate’s phone.”
 “Your associate?” Janus fished.
The man made an amused hum. “I believe you were calling him ‘Pat’ on your last adventure.” Janus could hear something being placed down on the other end of the phone. Before Janus could respond, he heard what sounded like an old keyboard being typed on. “Now,” Lo said. “I have to admit, I am surprised you were willing to oblige me so thoroughly by plugging the phone into your system. Let’s see…”
The screen on Virgil’s lit up bright blue all of a sudden. “…shit,” said Virgil.
“Well,” Lo said, “it seems you were clever enough not to plug it into the TPI system, which is disappointing, but…”
 There was more clicking on the other end. “Hmm, interesting music tastes for the 4000s,” he said.
“I’m an anthropologist,” Virgil spoke up.
“Ah, yes, I can see that,” Lo replied. “Virgil Eran, senior professor at Silver Mountain University, a vetted member of the Cultural Outreach program, and searched the phrase ‘How to eat sushi without making a cultural blunder and making everyone hate you and losing your job because what kind of shit anthropologist doesn’t know how to eat raw fish right’ which you then shortened to ‘How to eat sushi’ and proceeded to search 52 times in the last 48 hours.”
 Virgil went a bit scarlet around the ears. “Dude, did you really have to out me like that?” he hissed at the phone.
“My apologies,” Lo responded. “From my personal experience, don’t dip the rice parts in soy sauce, and don’t add too much wasabi. Overall, most people will be understanding of mistakes, and you will certainly not be fired or ostracized for handling food incorrectly. As long as you are not acting intentionally disrespectful, and I image you will not be considering your clear anxiety over whatever outing you are planning to attend, you will be fine.”
“Okay,” Virgil said. “Good point, but counterpoint, what if you’re wrong and everyone hates me forever?”
 “Is it the lunch meeting today at 11:30am?” Lo asked, “because I can see that a Professor Boris Laden has attended the event multiple years in a row. Considering he is a philosophy instructor, has no Japanese heritage that I can see, and I have found a photo of last year’s event wherein he has placed his chopsticks vertically in his rice, and he has yet to be fired or ostracized, I would postulate that your fears are unfounded.”
“Yeah but… okay, I really don’t have an argument for that one, except maybe I’m a piece of shit and everyone is looking for a reason to hate me.”
“Considering your many impressive accolades in your field, I would argue that ‘a piece of shit’ is not a good descriptor of you. Not to mention the fact that you are often a highly requested member for different committees in your department and outside of it.”
“Oh, but is that because people like me or because I’m an anxious mess and make sure events go off without a hitch?”
“From experience, disorder with people you enjoy the company of is far more tolerable than order with people you do not. Which explains my current living situation and the lack of finished dishes in my sink. Therefore, I would assume the former.”
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“A lot of assumptions,” Virgil commented, but he was smiling slightly.
“Assumptions based on data,” Lo argued back lightly.
“You really came in here, hacked into my computer and smacked my anxiety in the face, huh?”
“Glad to have helped.”
“Y-”
“Are the two of you finished?” Janus interrupted, finally getting sick of the two of them.
“Not nearly,” Lo said. “I have gained access to an entire network of a very large university and will be sorting through the data for a long time.”
“Ugh, right,” Virgil groaned, “and you got access through my integrator.”
“I doubt they’ll be able to trace it back to you if you don’t tell them.”
“Nice try,” Virgil said dryly, “but not likely. I’m telling them about you immediately so they can work to kick you out.”
Lo laughed. “Fair enough, but I’ve already gotten plenty of information at this point. Including the fact that you work with the TPI and scheduled an appointment with an Agent Janus Picani this morning set to start a few minutes before this phone call. So, hello Janus.”
“Bastard,” Janus shot back.
“And goodbye Professor Eran. It was a pleasure.” He hung up.
Virgil sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “This is going to be fun to explain to both of our bosses.”
  Arc II What We Do to Each Other
Chapter 16:
As it would turn out, Janus and Virgil did not get in trouble for hooking up the old phone to Virgil’s integrator, mostly because it wasn’t really a mistake on their part. The phone cleared all virus checks that the tech people both from the university and the TPI ran on it. The phone should have been clean and should not have caused an issue.
In fact, they were still trying to pin down the code on the general university server. They could tell that something was mucking about on the system but what or how was a mystery. This also meant that there was no telling what information had been compromised and considering how many things Silver Mountain had its hands in, that was… a bit worrying.
 Another worrying thing was there was suddenly more activity of late at the TPI. There were more time distortions popping up every day. Usually they would be few and far in between. There had been 3 total recorded the year before, but over 12 in the last week. Some of them were fake like the one Janus had investigated, but some of them were real. It painted a distressing picture and also was a drain on their resources. Khalid was actually looking to advertise positions to hire new recruits which was something she rarely did as she liked to keep appointments to the TPI in house.
 They’d even loosed the number of field agents needed for each mission and Janus and Remus had been splitting up just to get everything done. Today, he and Remus had thankfully only two missions scheduled for the day.
“Are we going together or separate today?” Janus asked Remus.
“Think they’ll burn me at the stake for being a witch if I go alone to either of them?” Remus asked.
“I don’t know. Probably. I think we’re getting a bit late into the 1700s for that in Cuba, but I have no idea about Mesopotamia.”
“Let’s just go together. I did not like almost drowning yesterday because I was the only stranger in town when the weather was going wonky.”
“Surely it isn’t because you opened your mouth. Ever.” Janus said dryly.
“How was I supposed to know he was the local clergyman’s son?”
 Janus rolled his eyes. “On second thought,” he said, pushing a button on his desk to choose Cuba as he next mission, and standing up. “I don’t want you coming with me.” Yet, he did not protest when Remus also signed up for the Cuba mission and he waited for him by the office door before going to talk to Rhi.
Rhi was a bit frazzled when which meant quite a bit as she was usually incredibly put together. Remus didn’t even seem inclined to tease her today.
“Okay,” she said once they’d closed the door behind them. She flipped through some documents on her desk. “Picani and Clockson. Camaguey Cuba 1755. Do you know Cuba?”
 “Uh,” Janus said. “Yeah?”
“Like you’re reading the things, right? I don’t have to babysit you, right? You got it? The Seven Year War was happening, but it won’t affect you much as it hasn’t really hit Cuba. It’s the middle of the Camaguey Carnival. Everyone will be everywhere and there will be chaos so as long as you don’t really fuck up you should be fine. Um…apparent races.” She looked up at them and studied them each for a moment as thought looking at them for the first time despite having known them for years. “It’ll work. Go to costuming.”
“Shouldn’t we…” Janus said, “sign things?”
 “…Yep,” she said, fiddling with her desktop and then sending documents over to their side to sign.
Janus and Remus both did before sending them back.
“Great. Good.” She stood and grabbed some things from behind her. “You can go.” She sat back down as they took their things and Janus noticed a message pop up on her desk. She looked up at Remus looking exhausted. “What?” she asked.
“Just open it,” Remus said.
Rhi tapped it and a photo opened.
“I got her a new mouse toy!” Remus said happily as Rhi looked at the picture of Diesel Fuel attacking a cloth mouse.
“That is… appreciated Agent Clockson,” Rhi said. “Now get out.”
 They did, leaving to get their costumes on and checked. Costuming was just as busy and frazzled as Rhi had been and they actually had to wait for decon because there’d been a mix up with the agents leaving before them. They landed in Cuba without issue. Janus could already hear the festival in full swing outside the small building they’d were in. Remy was standing there with a very not time appropriate mug of coffee.
“Sue me,” Remy said when Janus raised an eyebrow at it. “Please just… get in and out without causing trouble. Seriously. I don’t want to have to deal with that on top of everything else.”
 “We’ll do our best,” Janus assured.
Remy pulled his sunglasses down to look at him. He looked exhausted. “God please do more than your best.”
Janus nodded tightly. “We’ll be in and out,” he said, already glancing at his timepiece. It had been disguised as a golden bracelet which made it a bit harder to actually use, but wrist watches wouldn’t be invented for more than a century, so they’d have to make do. “The time distortion, if that’s what it is, should be in the middle of town. Let’s go.”
He and Remus exited the building onto the packed city street.
 Janus was immediately bombarded with all types of sights, sounds, and smells. There were many colorful articles of clothing and costumes as people went every which way along the street talking to other members of their community, playing instruments, and dancing. There was the sound of people speaking Spanish, still mostly almost pure Castilian Spanish with perhaps a bit of influence from Taino as the Haitian revolution had yet to push the Creole language over to Cuba. People must have been hard at work cooking different dishes for the carnival as many different spices wafted through the air. It was sticky hot considering it was the middle of June in the tropics and Janus was immediately sweating despite the temperature appropriate clothing he’d been outfitted with.
 He glanced around their immediate area, just scoping out the crowds. His eyes were immediately drawn to one person near them.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me,” he said out loud when he saw Pat. Remus looked in the direction Janus was.
Even if Janus didn’t recognize him the moment he laid eyes on him, he probably still would have ended up staring as he was the only person in the area who clearly did not know how to do the dance he was attempting.
Remus snorted and Janus shook his head in secondhand embarrassment. “Well, would you look whose boyfriend’s here,” he said to Janus. Make that firsthand embarrassment. “Has anyone told him the Mambo wasn’t invented until the 1900s and also that’s not how you do it?”
 Chapter 17
Pat stopped dancing the moment he saw Janus approaching him, but he still bobbed cheerfully ( and unrhythmically) to the music. “Hi Janus,” he said pleasantly.
“You just have to rub it in, huh?”
There was a flash of confusion across his face, but then he smiled. “Well, I know where in our relationship you are. How was France?”
“You’re a bastard.”
“You stole the phone,” he laughed.
“You stole the bomb,” Janus countered, “and you wanted me to steal the phone. You booby trapped it.”
“No,” Pat correct, putting a finger up. “We have security on my phone because in high school I once forgot it in the school locker room and long story short, the three of us ended up in a lake. So, then Lo made sure I always had some sort of tracker on it. When I started time traveling, he updated it and when I met you we updated it again in case there was ever an opportunity like that. Lo calls it using our weaknesses to our advantage.”
 “He’s a bastard too,” Janus growled.
Pat just laughed.
“Is someone talking about me?” Remus asked, stepping over to them. Janus rolled his eyes.
“Oh,” Pat said, blinking at Janus’s partner for a moment. “Remus.” He hesitated slightly. “How are you doing?”
“Me?” Remus asked. “Uh, I’m doing good. A little stressed out with work, but fine.”
“Good,” Pat said with just a little too much heartfulness to it.
“What?” Janus asked, eyes narrowed at Pat. “What is that?”
“What is what?” Pat asked. He met Janus’s eyes briefly and it made panic surge up Janus’s spine because the look Pat was sending him wasn’t one that said he was playing dumb. It was a warning.
 Oh, Janus did not like this. That look told Janus Pat had some foreknowledge that he absolutely could not tell Janus about without messing up the timeline spectacularly. This was why this mess the two of them were mixed up in was so bad, but it seemed Janus did not have much of a choice when it came to Pat.
Despite how bad of an idea he knew it was, he still wanted to push, because whatever Pat was hiding could be very, very bad and it had to do with Remus. There were so many reasons Pat could be acting like that around Remus, but the worst ones were definitely the ones on his mind. Death, injury, illness. They were all possible especially in their line of work and especially with how time was being screwed with right now. And Pat knew. He knew exactly what the answer was, and oh did Janus want to push.
Experience knowing what worse things could come out of having foreknowledge made Janus bite his tongue.
 “So, what are you two doing here,” Pat asked, and Janus unhappily let him change the subject.
“Oh, like you don’t know,” Janus replied.
“I don’t know,” Pat said innocently.
“There’s another time distortion,” Janus said, “and while you didn’t know what it was the last time I saw you, I’m pretty sure you do now.”
“Oh, I didn’t know there was a time distortion here. I can help you if you like,” he offered sweetly.
“Oh, yeah, sure. Then why are you here?”
“I wanted to see if I could find the Flying Dutchman,” Pat told him.
“And so you went to Camaguey?”
“Uh huh.”
“One of the farthest places from the ocean in Cuba?”
 “Is it?”
“I don’t trust you.”
Pat just shrugged. “Well, if you don’t want my help finding the time distortion, I’ll just be on my way then.”
“Wait,” he said when Pat went to turn away. Pat paused. Janus turned to Remus. “Remus, do you think he’s bullshitting me so I let him wander off and do whatever the hell he’s doing, or do you think he’s bullshitting me into letting him come with us.”
“Hmm,” Remus said, looking Pat up and down. Janus could immediately tell he wasn’t going to get any helpful answer. “Well, if we’re going with the how much do I get to see his, admittedly very sexy, ass criteria.” Janus pinched the bridge of his nose. “Letting him leave now means instant gratification and a nice full image when he turns away. However, letting him go with us means many more opportunities to get a glimpse, but they’d probably just be glimpses. So, yeah that’s a tough call.”
“You didn’t even bother to give me an actual hidden suggestion with that bullshit,” Janus groaned. He glanced at Pat only to see him hiding his very red face in his hands. Janus blinked. “Oh,” he said. “You got him, Remus.” Janus was surprised. He’d expected a bit more tenacity for someone with Pat’s personality. Of course, Janus was used to Remus, so that perhaps had some effect. Pat made a muffled distressed sound behind his hands and Janus raised an eyebrow. “You really got him.”
Pat flapped one hand around while still using the other to completely hide his face. “It’s just. His face. Saying that. Is weird.”
 Janus could not say that he didn’t feel a slight spark of joy at seeing Pat flustered. After all, Pat’s weapon of choice had often been flirting with Janus in the past. However, he still smacked Remus on the shoulder when it looked like he was about to continue with something likely far more inappropriate. “We are here for a reason,” he reminded. He turned to consider Pat and squinted at him. “You’re coming with us, I’ve decided. I don’t want to let you out of my sights. Don’t,” he said empathically turning to Remus as the man opened his mouth once more.
 Pat had mostly recovered, though his cheeks were just a bit pink still. “Yeah,” he said. “I’ll go with you. Where do we start?”
Janus glanced at his timepiece. “It’s not showing up on our trackers yet.”
“It messed with your tracker last time,” Pat pointed out.
“I know,” Janus said. “Which means it could be another fake one or whatever is causing it hasn’t started yet. If things start going wrong, but it still doesn’t show on our radar, it’s almost certainly a fake one, but some of the fake ones haven’t blocked our technology.”
“Here, I can check,” Pat said.
“Please don’t pull out an iPhone,” Janus begged.
 Pat stuck out his tongue at him, and then smiled. He reached for the bracelet on his wrist and twisted it back and forth a few times before pressing his palms together. He glanced around them quickly to make sure no one around them was watching and then peeled apart his palms like he was miming reading a book.
“What the fuck is that, and how do I get one?” Remus asked immediately. It was innocuous, whatever it was. If someone from this time caught a glimpse of the display, they’d likely assume it was a trick of the light, but staring right at it, Janus could tell it was a map of the surrounding areas with a softly glowing blue light marking their current location. Janus could see no screen or origin of a hologram. It looked like the image was drawn onto the man’s palms, but as he watched, the image shifted to zoom out.
 “There doesn’t seem to be anything major yet,” Pat said wiggling his fingers a bit. The display changed slightly to some sort of colorful overlay Janus did not understand. Pat hummed. “Did you two come from that building recently?” he asked nodding at it.
“Yes,” Janus replied. “How do you know?”
“There’s sometimes a slight temperature change when people time travel,” Pat explained. “I can read it on here.” He tilted his head. “There also seems to be a big enough temperature change in a church a few blocks away that could indicate time travel. Want to check it out?”
“We might as well,” Janus agreed.
“And if it’s nothing, we can get drunk on the communion wine!”
“He’s going to get immediately struck by lightning,” Janus said.
 Chapter 18
“If we see anyone,” Janus said as they entered the church. “You keep your mouth shut. Do you understand me? Remus, do you understand me?”
Remus immediately turned to Pat. “You know, I didn’t grow up Catholic,” he said to Pat who looked at him in confusion. “So the first time I ever entered a Catholic church, you can’t blame me for being a little confused about the whole cabinet thing with a wall between them. After all, everyone was singing about glory to god and what not. So I…”
Janus slapped him. “This is why you were almost burned at the stake yesterday.”
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“Excuse you,” Remus said, putting his hand over his heart. “I was almost drowned.”
“You were almost drowned?” Pat asked, his voice seeming legitimately distressed.
Remus shrugged a smile on his face that caused a Pavlovian migraine to start up behind Janus’s eyes. “It’s one of the hazards of the jobs, and really it would have all been worth it if I’d actually gotten to drown in that man’s…”
“We’re in a church!” Janus cut him off switching from Spanish to Swahili in the hopes that no random passersby would be able to understand him in this time and place. “Don’t talk about lewd sex things. Don’t talk about sex at all. It’s a Catholic church!”
  Remus continued to speak in Spanish with no regard for anything. “But not talking about lewd sex things takes away 3/4ths of my personality,” he pouted.
“More like 9/10th,” Janus grumbled, “and the other 1/10th is just normal stupid.”
“Hey, you shouldn’t be mean,” Pat scolded, in fucking English for some reason, “but Remus, honey, you probably shouldn’t be saying things like that right now.”
“No, no, he has a point,” Remus said switching to English.
“He’s my partner, I have the right to call him stupid,” Janus insisted.
“And I love you too!” Remus said in Greek because he was really, truly, stupid.
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Pat looked between the two, but then seemed to accept it, dropping the concerned expression for a slightly amused one. “If you say so.”
“Can I… help you?” A voice asked. All three of them whipped around to see a young boy looking at them and seeming very confused. Which was fair considering that to his ears, they’d just been speaking nonsense.
“We’re here to pray!” Remus claimed, then he turned to wink at Pat and said under his breath in Swahili, “to that ass.” Pat went immediately bright red again, which was doubtlessly Remus’s aim. Janus subtlety stepped on his foot while smiling at the boy.
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“Oh,” the boy said. “Okay.” Thankfully, he didn’t seem interested in questioning the random strangers in front of him further. “I’m going to go back to the celebration now.”
Janus smiled at him. “Have fun,” he said. He waited for the boy to leave through the front door before slapping Remus on the back of the head.
“Ow!” he whined sounding far too pained for how hard Janus had actually hit him.
Janus rolled his eyes. “Let’s just start investigating,” he said.
“Sure, sure, you never let me have any fun,” Remus said, pulling up his wrist and spinning the golden bracelets on his arm. “Hmm…” he said.
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snowdice · 4 years ago
Text
Finding the Time to Study Fic 2 [Day 32]
Here is my starting post for today’s study break stories session. See this post for more details and feel free to send me asks to keep me going! It’s been a lot of fun so far! I will reblog this post with the story as I write them today. I’ll be constantly looking for ideas of times and places for Janus to have missions, so feel free to send in any you can think of at any point!
If you are a new follower or just don’t want all of these posts clogging your dash, please feel free to block the tag “study break stories” as all posts and voting about it will go there. You can still see the finished product of the story even if you are blocking that tag as I will not tag the edited chapters with “study break stories” but with the tag “folds in paper.” See edited chapters below. None edited chapters are under the cut.
My Masterpost Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11
I also have a playlist on youtube (because Spotify didn’t have one of the songs I wanted). It’s short, and not really for serious listening, but I had fun with it.
This was on hiatus for a while because I needed to focus a lot harder on my exam than usual studying and then it was break after that, but I have to get some stuff read for next week, so I’m going to be doing this for a bit today! Last time we just entered a church... with Remus. Let’s see how this goes...
Chapter 12
There was something off about his readings. Clearly the time distortion was starting to pull at this place with the way the weather was flickering between storming and sunny, but he still couldn’t quite pinpoint the exact location of the source of it. He could, however, get that it must be somewhere on this side of the river more into the downtown area, so that’s the way he was walking, Pat close on his heels.
“What’s your name, by the way?” he asked.
Janus shot him a glare. “Elvis Presley,” he said.
Pat frowned, clearly knowing who that was. “There’s no reason to be mean.”
 “You did it to me first.”
“…Introduced myself as a famous musician?” he asked. Janus didn’t respond, and after a moment, Pat laughed lightly. “You really don’t understand time travel, do you?”
“Oh, yeah,” Janus said. “Name the three types of time distortions.”
“Just because I don’t know the names of things doesn’t mean I don’t understand them.” He stuck out his tongue. Janus was dealing with an actual toddler. “Unlike you who has a bunch of fancy words, but just caused a time loop.”
Janus scoffed. “I did not just cause a time loop.”
“Maybe not a big one,” Pat agreed, “but you did.”
 Janus raised an eyebrow. “I’ve never introduced myself to you with a musician’s name, but now you’ve told me that I will. So, at some point in the future I will have to, thereby making you think to say that now. Time loop.”
“That’s not… that doesn’t count.”
“Does too,” Pat claimed. “Like I have said once before and you may or may not have heard me say before, anything you do to me to get back at me for something I haven’t done yet, just causes whatever that is to happen in the first place.”
“But you’re still going to do it.”
 “Then take it up with future me. I haven’t done anything to you.” Then he paused and sighed. “…Which I guess means you’ve done nothing to me.” He seemed to mull this concept over for a long moment. “Well you were a bit crabby about me not knowing what a time distortion was, but I can forgive you for that.”
“And I’m supposed to forgive you?”
“Like I said,” Pat said. “I haven’t done anything yet.”
“You also haven’t done anything to endear yourself to me either,” Janus grumbled.
“Hmm,” Pat said. “Fine.” He pulled something out of his pocket. “You’re obviously not having much luck finding whatever you’re looking for. Tell me what it is and I’ll help.”
Janus squinted at what was in his hand. “Is that… an iPhone 5?”
“No!” he said. “It’s super-secret time travel tech disguised as an iPhone 5!”
“We’re in 2027,” Janus said. “Not a great disguise. Those things have been obsolete for a decade.”
“Well I’ll keep in mind to have my tech disguised as phones from the right year next time,” Pat said, sticking out his tongue. “Now what are we looking for?”
“If my timepiece can’t find it, I’m certain yours can’t.”
 Pat rolled his eyes and tapped on the device’s screen a couple of times. “I’m going to guess it’s that,” he said proudly.
Janus leaned over to look at the screen. “Are you using google maps?” he sputtered.
“It integrates time relevant data like traffic conditions and local weather warnings with time travel technology,” Pat explained. “Something seems to be going on in a museum a couple of blocks that way.”
“I…” Janus said. That was actually a really good idea, usually unnecessary with scouts observing that data beforehand, and Janus wasn’t sure how good the accuracy would be considering whatever was taking it into account was automated, but still a good idea. “Well, I guess since we have no other leads, we can check it out.”
 Pat looked far too proud for having only used a piece of tech that hadn’t even been confirmed as accurate. “Then, let’s go,” he said right as a chilly wind started to pick up and a couple of snowflakes began to fall around them. “Before that gets worse…”
Janus let Pat lead with his iPhone. Janus’s timepiece still wasn’t picking up a clear signal for some reason, but it seemed to point in the same general direction as Pat’s. Strangely though, as they got closer to their destination, the signal started to get fuzzier. Pat’s tech seemed unaffected leading them closer to the museum.
 When they got to the Musée Fabre museum, Janus stopped. “What?” Pat asked. He was shivering slightly in the cold and holding his arms around himself.
“My timepiece stopped working completely,” he said.
“I’m assuming that’s weird?” Pat said.
“It is,” Janus confirmed, turning to squint at him suspiciously. “How do I know you’re not the one doing it?”
“If I was doing it, wouldn’t I have just knocked it out from the get go?” Pat questioned.
Janus pursed his lips. “I don’t know,” he said. “Would you have? Maybe it’s a trick.”
Pat’s eyes narrowed a bit on him. “Think what you want, but I’m freezing. Come in with me if you want.”
 He dithered from a few moments before following Pat inside. Pat had already struck up a conversation with the woman charging admission into art museum. She was looking at him, her brow knit as he spoke. Janus nudged him away from her getting a confused glance from him in return. He shot a smile at the woman.
“Two adult passes for the museum and the Hotel Sabatier d’Espevran, please,” he said, placing down 14 euro.
“Ah,” she said, still looking at Pat oddly. “Yes sir.” She gave them the passes and Janus quickly shuffled Pat away.
“What is wrong with your French?” he hissed once they were out of earshot.
 “What?” he asked, bewildered.
“You sound like you’re reading Le Comte de Monte-Cristo. No one talks like that anymore.”
“I’m a little rusty,” Pat defended himself.
“Two centuries?” Janus asked. Pat stuck his tongue out like a child once again. “Is that your only way to respond to legitimate criticism?”
“What does it even matter anyway? No one ever expects time travel, at least not for something so silly.”
“It’s not silly,” Janus said. “It’s a legitimate issue. The wrong person who’s watched too much science fiction notices and you’re putting the timeline at risk. Not to mention if there are other time travelers around that aren’t as nice as me.”
 “Are there a lot of time travelers around?” Pat asked, sounding intrigued.
“There are plenty, both legal and not.”
“Huh,” he said, “but what are the chances we’ll run into another one?”
“Considering the time distortion? There could be many. Opportunists wanting to capitalize off the chaos, people trying to stop it, like me, and not to mention the person who caused it.”
“Wait, someone made it happen?” Pat asked.
“These things don’t just happen naturally.”
“Huh. So, something like this has to be caused by a person?”
“Yes,” Janus said. “…Why?”
Pat smiled. “No reason. I think we should head upstairs. Whatever I’m picking up says it’s around here, but I don’t see anything. Maybe it’s a floor or two above us.”
“Which is why it’s ridiculous to use Google Maps.”
 “Would you rather use yours?” he asked sweetly.
“I’m still not convinced it’s not your doing,” Janus growled. “Why does your tech still work when mine doesn’t?”
“Probably the same reason the ring did,” he muttered.
“What?”
“What?”
“You may be the most aggravating being in the universe.”
Pat glanced at him with a bit of a smirk. “I can’t tell you,” he said. “It would be a much bigger risk to the timeline than me speaking in French from the 1830s. But, I’m pretty sure the reason mine still works is just a software difference.”
“What the hell do you mean a software difference?”
 Pat opened his mouth, doubtlessly to supply him with yet another frustratingly cheeky and unhelpful answer. Yet, Pat did not have a chance to do so as, just as Janus stepped onto the second floor of the museum, the ground started to violently shake. Janus tried to turn to catch Pat as the other man’s foot slipped on the last step, but he couldn’t do so in time. Pat fell onto his hands and knees, sliding back a few steps and smacking his face into the stairs hard once and then a couple of times more after that as he slid.
 Chapter 13
The room stopped shaking after a moment. “Ow,” Pat said. He seemed a bit stunned but was still moving at least. He carefully maneuvered himself into a seating position. “Ouch. Owie.” He reached up to poke his own nose. “Ow!” Janus slapped his hand away when he got there. A bit of blood was already trickling from his nose and there was a small cut over his eye, but it wasn’t bleeding too much.
Janus pushed him so he was leaning slightly forward and produced a pack of time appropriate tissues from his pocket. He pulled one out of the package and offered it to him.
 He took it and pressed it up against his nose to try to stop the bleeding. He seemed mostly alright though Janus imagined he’d have plenty of bruises down the line. The power in the museum flickered and Janus looked up. Now that he was listening, he could hear people panicking in and out of the museum.
“We should probably get off of the stairs,” he suggested.
“Yeah,” Pat agreed. Janus helped him to his feet, and they climbed back up the steps. Janus looked around and found an employees only sign a few feet away. Usually he’d not risk that as it could get him into trouble he didn’t want to be in, but considering the earthquake that had just happened, he could probably play it off as panic.
 He ushered Pat into a small room and found a chair and table. He had Pat sit in the chair and pulled out another one of the tissues to dab at the blood coming from the cut over his eyes. “Here,” he said. “Hold that there. I’m going to go see if there are any bandages about.”
Pat took the tissue with the hand not already holding one to his nose. “Thanks,” he said.
Janus nodded and got to his feet. The lights flickered once again but didn’t stay off for now. He didn’t know how long that would last.
 He couldn’t see anything that might hold bandages in this room, but there was a second door. “I’ll be right back,” he told Pat, exiting through it.
The lights flickered once more as the door closed behind him and he cursed. When they came back up Janus’s eyes immediately fell on a man. They both froze.
“Remus!” Janus hissed the second their eyes met. “What are you doing here?”
Remus blinked at him for a moment. “Hi. Janus,” he said. “I… come to France for… tea sometimes?”
“There isn’t any tea back here.”
“So, there isn’t…” he said. There was a moment of silence. “Uh, so I actually cannot talk to you right now.”
 “What do you mean?” Janus asked. Remus grimaced in a way Janus had never seen from him before. It immediately set off alarm bells in Janus’s head. “Oh my god,” Janus said. “Oh my god. You’re not from the same time as me.”
“Oh, you have no idea,” Remus mumbled.
“Holy shit, you’re looping?!”
“It’s… not looping if I wasn’t here the first time.”
“Remus, we spend more than 12 hours a day together most of the time. The only thing worse than this is if I looped back to this time myself.”
“…Yeah. Anyway, I need to leave now.”
“Please do.”
 He turned to go, but then stopped. “Oh, and,” he reached into his pocket and tossed something at Janus. Janus caught it.
It was Band-Aids.
“Oh, shit,” Janus spat at the clear use of foreknowledge. “I hate this. I hate you. I’m going to kill you the next time you see me.”
“Sure, Jan.”
“Go.”
He did, slipping into the next room while Janus took a deep breath and then turned back to the door behind him. He schooled his face before Pat looked up. “I found some Band-Aids.”
Pat nodded and Janus came over to squat next to him.
 Janus opened the box and Pat looked down. His eyes lit up with sudden joy so intense that Janus felt like he’d just gotten a punch to the gut. “Kitty Band-Aids!” he exclaimed. Janus bothered to actually look at the design on the container, only to note the cartoon cats on the front. Pat was almost vibrating off his seat. “Look they’re all so cute!” He grabbed the container from him to inspect the different designs printed on the back with glee even as a bit of blood was still trickling from his nose.
Janus took the box back gently and guided the wad of bloody Kleenexes back to his nose.
 “Which would you like?” Janus asked.
“Oh, they are all so cute,” Pat cooed. “Um, how about that one!” he pointed. “Or that one! Or that one!”
“Pat you only have one cut.”
“But they’re all so cute!” Pat said, tongue tucking into his cheek. He contemplated the box again. “Let’s do the black one,” he finally settled on.
Janus selected one of the Band-Aids with a black cat wrapped around a pink ball of yarn and staring back at them with wide green eyes. The think looked like it had partaken in one two many doses of catnip, but Janus didn’t mention that.
 Instead, he just carefully unstuck the backing from the Band-Aid and motioned for Pat to remove the tissue from his forehead. He smiled at Janus as he drew back.
Janus cleared his throat. “How’s the nose.”
“It’s slowing down,” Pat replied. “Thanks.”
“No problem,” Janus replied. They met eyes for a second before Pat looked away back at the box of Band-Aids.
“Oh,” Pat said. “There’s a grey one. I didn’t notice.” He pointed to it. “I should have used that one.”
“Do you like grey cats?” Janus asked.
“I like all kitties,” he said, “but one of my roommates loves grey cats. He had one when he was a kid and thinks of them as good omens. Seeing one always brightens up his day.”
“A friend of mine has a grey cat,” Janus said. “She’s much more tolerable than him.”
Pat laughed a bit. “Don’t be mean,” he said.
“Oh, he deserves it, don’t worry.” Janus considered him for a moment. “Here,” he said, pulling out one of the Band-Aids with the grey cat on it. It did, actually, look a lot like Diesel Fuel.
“But I don’t…”
Janus just shrugged and stuck it on his cheek where there was no wound. Pat giggled and touched it with a finger. Janus stood back up.
“Can I have another tissue?” Pat asked.
“Sure.” Janus handed a tissue over to him and he crumpled up the bloody ones in his hand.
“I think I’m good to keep going,” Pat said, putting the new tissue under his nose. “The nose will stop soon.”
 Pat got out his iPhone and directed him back out of the room. They checked the second floor and didn’t find anything and so went to the third floor. The second they arrived in the room that Pat’s phone was directing them too, Janus knew that it must be right. There was a strange, distorted whirling sound and the entire room was shaking slightly like they were standing next to a railroad track.
“I’m guessing this is it,” Pat said.
Janus nodded and looked over his shoulder at the screen. They both cautiously walked towards where the little dot was on the phone.
 “Is that it?” Pat asked, pointing at a small device on the center column in the room. Janus reached forward to flip the switch on it. The whirling stopped and the room settled. Janus’s time piece vibrated as it came back online. They waited for a few moments. “I assumed… time distortions would be more…”
“They are,” Janus said. “This one is artificial.”
“What does that mean?”
“It’s a simulation,” Janus said. “It causes similar symptoms to a time distortion, but it’s not actually fracturing time at all.”
“That’s good, isn’t it?” Pat asked.
“I don’t know,” Janus said. He took the piece of tech of the wall and carefully stored it in his pocket, “but someone’s trying to get our attention.”
 Chapter 14
Janus didn’t feel comfortable leaving France 2027 just yet, still weirded out by the strange turn of events. So, he and Pat ended up sticking around for a couple of hours. They looked through the art museum for a bit, but Janus was having trouble focusing on the pieces, and Pat eventually suggested they get some air. Janus agreed considering the museum would close for the night soon anyway.
They wandered around the downtown for a bit. The people seemed to jump back from the strange weather and earthquake that afternoon rather quickly, and there were plenty still about to blend into.
 Pat was snapping photos every so often like a tourist which Janus shook his head at but allowed because even with the outdated phone it almost made them blend in even more. It also might stop any questions about Pat’s weird way of speaking French. They could just say he was an overeager tourist who watched too many old movies.
“Ooo!” Pat said. “We should get crepes.”
“Why?”
“You can’t go to France and not eat crepes.”
“I assure you, you can,” Janus said dryly.
Pat shot a pout at him and the next thing he knew he was in a small crepe shop.
 For Janus, choosing something was easy. He just ordered the first thing he found on the menu which seemed to be a standard one with ham and eggs. Pat on the other hand seemed to be struggling greatly, and Janus had to gently push him to the side to let some other customers order first.
“What should I get!?” Pat asked. “They all look so good! I could do strawberry preserves or maple syrup or just sugar!”
“Or you could get one that is actually food,” Janus suggested mildly. “I don’t think you need any more sugar judging by how you are acting.”
Pat rolled his eyes. “You sound like Lo.”
 Janus made a note of the name ‘Lo’ even though it surely was a nickname.
“But, since you’re insisting, I’ll get something healthy. I’ll have the strawberry one. That’s a fruit!”
“It comes with a cream cheese filling,” Janus pointed out.
“And it’s fruit!”
Janus shook his head and stepped up to the counter. “One ham and cheese and one strawberry preserve, please,” he said to the cashier as he was not allowing Pat to order in French and accidently say something stupid. He forked over some euros.
“You don’t have to pay for me,” Pat protested when he saw that.
Janus glanced back at him. “I was afraid you’d try to pay in francs,” he said dryly.
 It looked like Pat was about to stick his tongue out at him, remembered that Janus had criticized him for that earlier, and then just scrunched up his face in displeasure as though that was any less childish.
They waited for their crepes to be finished and then went to eat them outside near a water fountain.
“I can pay you back for the crepe,” Pat said after they sat down. “I do actually have euros.”
Janus waved him off. “It wasn’t that expensive.”
Pat hummed. “Well, in that case. I insist on paying for a wish for you.” Janus raised an eyebrow. “In the fountain!” Pat clarified.
 Pat set aside his crepe to dig in his pocket for a couple of coins. “Here!” he said handing one over.
Janus glanced over at the fountain. “No.”
“Oh, come on,” Pat beseeched. “You have to want something. I’ll even throw it in for you, but you have to make a wish first!”
“No.”
“Please!”
Janus sighed. “Fine.” He popped the rest of his crepe in his mouth. “I wish for a crepe,” he said after swallowing.
“You just had a crepe, silly.”
“But I liked it, so I want another one.”
“We can go back and get you another crepe.”
“Ah, but I’m not hungry anymore.”
Pat crossed his arms. “You’re just being difficult on purpose.”
 “Not me,” Janus said putting hand over his heart. “I would never do something like that.”
 Pat glared at him, but then snatched the coin out of his hand. “Fine!” he said. “One crepe wish coming right up.” He hopped up with the two coins and darted over to the water fountain. Janus turned to watch him go but then happened to catch sight of something out of the corner of his eyes.
Pat’s phone.
He didn’t pause in his movement, completing the turn, but as he watched Pat close his eyes, presumably to focus on his own wish, Janus snuck a hand out and grabbed the phone without looking. He slipped it into his own pocket.
 Pat came back over after throwing both coins in the fountain and didn’t even seem to notice that his phone was missing, picking up his crepe to take another bite. Just to make sure, though Janus decided to distract him. “What do you think of your crepe?” Janus asked.
“I like it! It’s sweet, but not too sweet. There was a crepe place across the street from my apartment in college, but they always put a bit too much sugar in the dough, I think. I’d still eat them, but these are much better.”
Janus nodded and kept up the light conversation until Pat was finished.
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“Well,” he said then, getting to his feet. “It seems that nothing else is going to happen regarding the time distortion. I should be getting back.”
Pat hummed. “I should too. It’s movie night!”
“I probably should arrest you,” Janus noted.
“In the middle of all of these people?” Pat asked mildly.
“Touché,” Janus said.
Pat gasped and pointed at him. “Pun!” he said. Janus blinked at him. “Because we’re in France! That’s French!”
“…Goodbye Pat,” Janus said, turning to walk away from him.
“Goodbye… wait I still don’t know your name!”
Janus stopped to look back at him for a moment. “Like I said,” he replied. “Elvis.”
“Fine,” Pat said. “Au revoir, mon chéri.”
“You never stop, do you?” Janus asked.
Pat giggled. “Considering I don’t know what you mean, I imagine I’m just getting started.”
Janus actually left then, walking off towards the alley he’d first arrived in. In some ways, the mission had been a bust, but in others it had gone very well.
He felt for the weight of the phone in his pocket before pulling up the display screen on his timepiece to go back to the TPI.
It had gone very well indeed.
 Chapter 15
The first thing Janus had done when he’d returned to the TPI was hand over the timebomb to Khalid who sent it to forensics. Within the hour, forensics got back to them that it was the same timebomb as 2999 and that it had never exploded, but simply been diffused. Which meant, blessings on blessings, everyone got to go home that night.
 Not that Janus went home, no, he ended up falling asleep on his desk somewhere between 3 and 4am, but at least he wasn’t sharing his space with anyone. He’d been trying to hack the cell phone all night to see if it had anything he could use, but he honestly had no idea what he was doing. All it seemed he could do was play some annoying song over and over again about never giving someone up. At around 2am, he’d finally broken and sent off an email, though, he’d continued to try to mess with it after that.
 He got woken up by Lena coming into the office at 7am, and noticed he already had an email response asking when Janus wanted to come in.
“Now?” he sent back.
“…Do you sleep?” was the immediate response. “And yes.”
His wrist buzzed as an appointment in 5 seconds downloaded to his timepiece. He selected the coordinates and landed at Cultural Outreach. The receptionist blinked up at him and then back down at the screen on his desk. “Oh!” he said. “I didn’t see this appointment. I think Professor Eran is in his office.”
He didn’t stand to escort Janus this time, so Janus went ahead and went down the hall to Virgil’s office himself.
 He knocked on the door and while he was waiting for Virgil to open it, the infernal contraption once again started to play the same stupid song.
“I didn’t even touch you!” he spat, getting it out and tapping on the screen.
“Jonas Brothers dude again?” Virgil asked causally upon opening the door.
Janus shoved it at him. “Make it stop.”
Virgil took it and fiddled with it for a few moments before it stopped with the song. “Oh my gosh,” he said scrolling through something on the screen.
“What.”
“What maniac sets a custom alarm for every 30-60 minutes for a week that just plays ‘Never Gonna Give You Up’? Oh, and one ‘It’s Not Unusual’ on Saturday. He’s mixing memes at an alarming rate.”
 “Can you. Just. Make it not happen. Anymore?”
Virgil smirked at him. “Maybe.” He turned around to go back into his office.
“Virgil,” Janus growled following him in.
Virgil just laughed. “What do you want to know about it?” he asked. “Just a fair warning… the song means he… likely was aware someone would steal it.”
“Of course, he was,” Janus groaned.
“But I’m sure we can still get something out of it.” Virgil started tapping at the screen again. “Okay, let’s see. It’s an iPhone 5, and someone jailbroke it.”
“What does that mean?”
“Tampered with it so they could install non-company approved software,” Virgil explained.
“Well I figured that since he was using Google Maps to track time distortions,” Janus grumbled.
 “I think I have something,” Virgil said to himself while digging through his desk. “Ah ha!” He held up some sort of cord. “This will let me hook it up to my integrator.” He slotted the cord into the bottom of the iPhone and then crawled under his desk to fiddle around with some other things. “There we go,” Virgil said popping back up. “It might take a few minutes. Running the program any faster might overheat the phone.”
Janus nodded and sat back to wait. Virgil grabbed the phone and started to play around with it a bit even as it uploaded all of its information to his computer.
“Weird,” Virgil said after a moment.
“What?” Janus asked, sitting up straighter.
“There are exactly two contacts. Fewer than I’d anticipate for a regular phone from the 2010s. More than I would expect from one clearly not being used as a phone.
 Virgil glanced to the side, and it must have finished the download because he unhooked it from the computer. “I have a 21st century phone network adapter,” Virgil said. “It transfers call back to whatever date the phone says. Do you want to try calling one?”
“It’s worth a shot,” Janus replied.
Virgil dug back into his desk for a small device that he plugged into the same port he’d plugged the earlier cord. “Okay, which contact do you want to try first?” he asked. “One has ‘Ro’ with a crown, red heart, and a gold star emoji. The other has “Lo” with a book, blue heart, and Milky Way emoji.”
 “He mentioned a Lo,” Janus said. “So, try him first.”
Virgil nodded. “I’ll put it on speaker.” He pressed some buttons before setting the phone on the desk between them.
The phone rang three times before with a bit of a crackle, it was answered. “Salutations,” a voice said, voice sounding a bit scratchy as though he had only just gotten up.
Virgil motioned with his head for Janus to speak. “Are you ‘Lo’?” he asked.
The man hummed. “To some people.”
Janus… didn’t quite know what to say to that, or even what questions he should ask.
“I’m assuming you’re the man that stole my associate’s phone.”
 “Your associate?” Janus fished.
The man made an amused hum. “I believe you were calling him ‘Pat’ on your last adventure.” Janus could hear something being placed down on the other end of the phone. Before Janus could respond, he heard what sounded like an old keyboard being typed on. “Now,” Lo said. “I have to admit, I am surprised you were willing to oblige me so thoroughly by plugging the phone into your system. Let’s see…”
The screen on Virgil’s lit up bright blue all of a sudden. “…shit,” said Virgil.
“Well,” Lo said, “it seems you were clever enough not to plug it into the TPI system, which is disappointing, but…”
 There was more clicking on the other end. “Hmm, interesting music tastes for the 4000s,” he said.
“I’m an anthropologist,” Virgil spoke up.
“Ah, yes, I can see that,” Lo replied. “Virgil Eran, senior professor at Silver Mountain University, a vetted member of the Cultural Outreach program, and searched the phrase ‘How to eat sushi without making a cultural blunder and making everyone hate you and losing your job because what kind of shit anthropologist doesn’t know how to eat raw fish right’ which you then shortened to ‘How to eat sushi’ and proceeded to search 52 times in the last 48 hours.”
 Virgil went a bit scarlet around the ears. “Dude, did you really have to out me like that?” he hissed at the phone.
“My apologies,” Lo responded. “From my personal experience, don’t dip the rice parts in soy sauce, and don’t add too much wasabi. Overall, most people will be understanding of mistakes, and you will certainly not be fired or ostracized for handling food incorrectly. As long as you are not acting intentionally disrespectful, and I image you will not be considering your clear anxiety over whatever outing you are planning to attend, you will be fine.”
“Okay,” Virgil said. “Good point, but counterpoint, what if you’re wrong and everyone hates me forever?”
 “Is it the lunch meeting today at 11:30am?” Lo asked, “because I can see that a Professor Boris Laden has attended the event multiple years in a row. Considering he is a philosophy instructor, has no Japanese heritage that I can see, and I have found a photo of last year’s event wherein he has placed his chopsticks vertically in his rice, and he has yet to be fired or ostracized, I would postulate that your fears are unfounded.”
“Yeah but… okay, I really don’t have an argument for that one, except maybe I’m a piece of shit and everyone is looking for a reason to hate me.”
“Considering your many impressive accolades in your field, I would argue that ‘a piece of shit’ is not a good descriptor of you. Not to mention the fact that you are often a highly requested member for different committees in your department and outside of it.”
“Oh, but is that because people like me or because I’m an anxious mess and make sure events go off without a hitch?”
“From experience, disorder with people you enjoy the company of is far more tolerable than order with people you do not. Which explains my current living situation and the lack of finished dishes in my sink. Therefore, I would assume the former.”
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“A lot of assumptions,” Virgil commented, but he was smiling slightly.
“Assumptions based on data,” Lo argued back lightly.
“You really came in here, hacked into my computer and smacked my anxiety in the face, huh?”
“Glad to have helped.”
“Y-”
“Are the two of you finished?” Janus interrupted, finally getting sick of the two of them.
“Not nearly,” Lo said. “I have gained access to an entire network of a very large university and will be sorting through the data for a long time.”
“Ugh, right,” Virgil groaned, “and you got access through my integrator.”
“I doubt they’ll be able to trace it back to you if you don’t tell them.”
“Nice try,” Virgil said dryly, “but not likely. I’m telling them about you immediately so they can work to kick you out.”
Lo laughed. “Fair enough, but I’ve already gotten plenty of information at this point. Including the fact that you work with the TPI and scheduled an appointment with an Agent Janus Picani this morning set to start a few minutes before this phone call. So, hello Janus.”
“Bastard,” Janus shot back.
“And goodbye Professor Eran. It was a pleasure.” He hung up.
Virgil sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “This is going to be fun to explain to both of our bosses.”
  Arc II What We Do to Each Other
Chapter 16:
As it would turn out, Janus and Virgil did not get in trouble for hooking up the old phone to Virgil’s integrator, mostly because it wasn’t really a mistake on their part. The phone cleared all virus checks that the tech people both from the university and the TPI ran on it. The phone should have been clean and should not have caused an issue.
In fact, they were still trying to pin down the code on the general university server. They could tell that something was mucking about on the system but what or how was a mystery. This also meant that there was no telling what information had been compromised and considering how many things Silver Mountain had its hands in, that was… a bit worrying.
 Another worrying thing was there was suddenly more activity of late at the TPI. There were more time distortions popping up every day. Usually they would be few and far in between. There had been 3 total recorded the year before, but over 12 in the last week. Some of them were fake like the one Janus had investigated, but some of them were real. It painted a distressing picture and also was a drain on their resources. Khalid was actually looking to advertise positions to hire new recruits which was something she rarely did as she liked to keep appointments to the TPI in house.
 They’d even loosed the number of field agents needed for each mission and Janus and Remus had been splitting up just to get everything done. Today, he and Remus had thankfully only two missions scheduled for the day.
“Are we going together or separate today?” Janus asked Remus.
“Think they’ll burn me at the stake for being a witch if I go alone to either of them?” Remus asked.
“I don’t know. Probably. I think we’re getting a bit late into the 1700s for that in Cuba, but I have no idea about Mesopotamia.”
“Let’s just go together. I did not like almost drowning yesterday because I was the only stranger in town when the weather was going wonky.”
“Surely it isn’t because you opened your mouth. Ever.” Janus said dryly.
“How was I supposed to know he was the local clergyman’s son?”
 Janus rolled his eyes. “On second thought,” he said, pushing a button on his desk to choose Cuba as he next mission, and standing up. “I don’t want you coming with me.” Yet, he did not protest when Remus also signed up for the Cuba mission and he waited for him by the office door before going to talk to Rhi.
Rhi was a bit frazzled when which meant quite a bit as she was usually incredibly put together. Remus didn’t even seem inclined to tease her today.
“Okay,” she said once they’d closed the door behind them. She flipped through some documents on her desk. “Picani and Clockson. Camaguey Cuba 1755. Do you know Cuba?”
 “Uh,” Janus said. “Yeah?”
“Like you’re reading the things, right? I don’t have to babysit you, right? You got it? The Seven Year War was happening, but it won’t affect you much as it hasn’t really hit Cuba. It’s the middle of the Camaguey Carnival. Everyone will be everywhere and there will be chaos so as long as you don’t really fuck up you should be fine. Um…apparent races.” She looked up at them and studied them each for a moment as thought looking at them for the first time despite having known them for years. “It’ll work. Go to costuming.”
“Shouldn’t we…” Janus said, “sign things?”
 “…Yep,” she said, fiddling with her desktop and then sending documents over to their side to sign.
Janus and Remus both did before sending them back.
“Great. Good.” She stood and grabbed some things from behind her. “You can go.” She sat back down as they took their things and Janus noticed a message pop up on her desk. She looked up at Remus looking exhausted. “What?” she asked.
“Just open it,” Remus said.
Rhi tapped it and a photo opened.
“I got her a new mouse toy!” Remus said happily as Rhi looked at the picture of Diesel Fuel attacking a cloth mouse.
“That is… appreciated Agent Clockson,” Rhi said. “Now get out.”
 They did, leaving to get their costumes on and checked. Costuming was just as busy and frazzled as Rhi had been and they actually had to wait for decon because there’d been a mix up with the agents leaving before them. They landed in Cuba without issue. Janus could already hear the festival in full swing outside the small building they’d were in. Remy was standing there with a very not time appropriate mug of coffee.
“Sue me,” Remy said when Janus raised an eyebrow at it. “Please just… get in and out without causing trouble. Seriously. I don’t want to have to deal with that on top of everything else.”
 “We’ll do our best,” Janus assured.
Remy pulled his sunglasses down to look at him. He looked exhausted. “God please do more than your best.”
Janus nodded tightly. “We’ll be in and out,” he said, already glancing at his timepiece. It had been disguised as a golden bracelet which made it a bit harder to actually use, but wrist watches wouldn’t be invented for more than a century, so they’d have to make do. “The time distortion, if that’s what it is, should be in the middle of town. Let’s go.”
He and Remus exited the building onto the packed city street.
 Janus was immediately bombarded with all types of sights, sounds, and smells. There were many colorful articles of clothing and costumes as people went every which way along the street talking to other members of their community, playing instruments, and dancing. There was the sound of people speaking Spanish, still mostly almost pure Castilian Spanish with perhaps a bit of influence from Taino as the Haitian revolution had yet to push the Creole language over to Cuba. People must have been hard at work cooking different dishes for the carnival as many different spices wafted through the air. It was sticky hot considering it was the middle of June in the tropics and Janus was immediately sweating despite the temperature appropriate clothing he’d been outfitted with.
 He glanced around their immediate area, just scoping out the crowds. His eyes were immediately drawn to one person near them.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me,” he said out loud when he saw Pat. Remus looked in the direction Janus was.
Even if Janus didn’t recognize him the moment he laid eyes on him, he probably still would have ended up staring as he was the only person in the area who clearly did not know how to do the dance he was attempting.
Remus snorted and Janus shook his head in secondhand embarrassment. “Well, would you look whose boyfriend’s here,” he said to Janus. Make that firsthand embarrassment. “Has anyone told him the Mambo wasn’t invented until the 1900s and also that’s not how you do it?”
 Chapter 17
Pat stopped dancing the moment he saw Janus approaching him, but he still bobbed cheerfully ( and unrhythmically) to the music. “Hi Janus,” he said pleasantly.
“You just have to rub it in, huh?”
There was a flash of confusion across his face, but then he smiled. “Well, I know where in our relationship you are. How was France?”
“You’re a bastard.”
“You stole the phone,” he laughed.
“You stole the bomb,” Janus countered, “and you wanted me to steal the phone. You booby trapped it.”
“No,” Pat correct, putting a finger up. “We have security on my phone because in high school I once forgot it in the school locker room and long story short, the three of us ended up in a lake. So, then Lo made sure I always had some sort of tracker on it. When I started time traveling, he updated it and when I met you we updated it again in case there was ever an opportunity like that. Lo calls it using our weaknesses to our advantage.”
 “He’s a bastard too,” Janus growled.
Pat just laughed.
“Is someone talking about me?” Remus asked, stepping over to them. Janus rolled his eyes.
“Oh,” Pat said, blinking at Janus’s partner for a moment. “Remus.” He hesitated slightly. “How are you doing?”
“Me?” Remus asked. “Uh, I’m doing good. A little stressed out with work, but fine.”
“Good,” Pat said with just a little too much heartfulness to it.
“What?” Janus asked, eyes narrowed at Pat. “What is that?”
“What is what?” Pat asked. He met Janus’s eyes briefly and it made panic surge up Janus’s spine because the look Pat was sending him wasn’t one that said he was playing dumb. It was a warning.
 Oh, Janus did not like this. That look told Janus Pat had some foreknowledge that he absolutely could not tell Janus about without messing up the timeline spectacularly. This was why this mess the two of them were mixed up in was so bad, but it seemed Janus did not have much of a choice when it came to Pat.
Despite how bad of an idea he knew it was, he still wanted to push, because whatever Pat was hiding could be very, very bad and it had to do with Remus. There were so many reasons Pat could be acting like that around Remus, but the worst ones were definitely the ones on his mind. Death, injury, illness. They were all possible especially in their line of work and especially with how time was being screwed with right now. And Pat knew. He knew exactly what the answer was, and oh did Janus want to push.
Experience knowing what worse things could come out of having foreknowledge made Janus bite his tongue.
 “So, what are you two doing here,” Pat asked, and Janus unhappily let him change the subject.
“Oh, like you don’t know,” Janus replied.
“I don’t know,” Pat said innocently.
“There’s another time distortion,” Janus said, “and while you didn’t know what it was the last time I saw you, I’m pretty sure you do now.”
“Oh, I didn’t know there was a time distortion here. I can help you if you like,” he offered sweetly.
“Oh, yeah, sure. Then why are you here?”
“I wanted to see if I could find the Flying Dutchman,” Pat told him.
“And so you went to Camaguey?”
“Uh huh.”
“One of the farthest places from the ocean in Cuba?”
 “Is it?”
“I don’t trust you.”
Pat just shrugged. “Well, if you don’t want my help finding the time distortion, I’ll just be on my way then.”
“Wait,” he said when Pat went to turn away. Pat paused. Janus turned to Remus. “Remus, do you think he’s bullshitting me so I let him wander off and do whatever the hell he’s doing, or do you think he’s bullshitting me into letting him come with us.”
“Hmm,” Remus said, looking Pat up and down. Janus could immediately tell he wasn’t going to get any helpful answer. “Well, if we’re going with the how much do I get to see his, admittedly very sexy, ass criteria.” Janus pinched the bridge of his nose. “Letting him leave now means instant gratification and a nice full image when he turns away. However, letting him go with us means many more opportunities to get a glimpse, but they’d probably just be glimpses. So, yeah that’s a tough call.”
“You didn’t even bother to give me an actual hidden suggestion with that bullshit,” Janus groaned. He glanced at Pat only to see him hiding his very red face in his hands. Janus blinked. “Oh,” he said. “You got him, Remus.” Janus was surprised. He’d expected a bit more tenacity for someone with Pat’s personality. Of course, Janus was used to Remus, so that perhaps had some effect. Pat made a muffled distressed sound behind his hands and Janus raised an eyebrow. “You really got him.”
Pat flapped one hand around while still using the other to completely hide his face. “It’s just. His face. Saying that. Is weird.”
 Janus could not say that he didn’t feel a slight spark of joy at seeing Pat flustered. After all, Pat’s weapon of choice had often been flirting with Janus in the past. However, he still smacked Remus on the shoulder when it looked like he was about to continue with something likely far more inappropriate. “We are here for a reason,” he reminded. He turned to consider Pat and squinted at him. “You’re coming with us, I’ve decided. I don’t want to let you out of my sights. Don’t,” he said empathically turning to Remus as the man opened his mouth once more.
 Pat had mostly recovered, though his cheeks were just a bit pink still. “Yeah,” he said. “I’ll go with you. Where do we start?”
Janus glanced at his timepiece. “It’s not showing up on our trackers yet.”
“It messed with your tracker last time,” Pat pointed out.
“I know,” Janus said. “Which means it could be another fake one or whatever is causing it hasn’t started yet. If things start going wrong, but it still doesn’t show on our radar, it’s almost certainly a fake one, but some of the fake ones haven’t blocked our technology.”
“Here, I can check,” Pat said.
“Please don’t pull out an iPhone,” Janus begged.
 Pat stuck out his tongue at him, and then smiled. He reached for the bracelet on his wrist and twisted it back and forth a few times before pressing his palms together. He glanced around them quickly to make sure no one around them was watching and then peeled apart his palms like he was miming reading a book.
“What the fuck is that, and how do I get one?” Remus asked immediately. It was innocuous, whatever it was. If someone from this time caught a glimpse of the display, they’d likely assume it was a trick of the light, but staring right at it, Janus could tell it was a map of the surrounding areas with a softly glowing blue light marking their current location. Janus could see no screen or origin of a hologram. It looked like the image was drawn onto the man’s palms, but as he watched, the image shifted to zoom out.
 “There doesn’t seem to be anything major yet,” Pat said wiggling his fingers a bit. The display changed slightly to some sort of colorful overlay Janus did not understand. Pat hummed. “Did you two come from that building recently?” he asked nodding at it.
“Yes,” Janus replied. “How do you know?”
“There’s sometimes a slight temperature change when people time travel,” Pat explained. “I can read it on here.” He tilted his head. “There also seems to be a big enough temperature change in a church a few blocks away that could indicate time travel. Want to check it out?”
“We might as well,” Janus agreed.
“And if it’s nothing, we can get drunk on the communion wine!”
“He’s going to get immediately struck by lightning,” Janus said.
 Chapter 18
“If we see anyone,” Janus said as they entered the church. “You keep your mouth shut. Do you understand me? Remus, do you understand me?”
Remus immediately turned to Pat. “You know, I didn’t grow up Catholic,” he said to Pat who looked at him in confusion. “So the first time I ever entered a Catholic church, you can’t blame me for being a little confused about the whole cabinet thing with a wall between them. After all, everyone was singing about glory to god and what not. So I…”
Janus slapped him. “This is why you were almost burned at the stake yesterday.”
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