#pov i just found out why aph and emm started being friendly towards each other

[fortunemars]

Dnsnsn Aphmau gives the Gays their rights, yes because she cares and wants them to be happy, but also because she is SO GLAD they're gay and they aren't hounding on her anymore <⁠(⁠￣⁠︶⁠￣⁠)⁠↗

She's just like "Irene, finally these bitches got their own hints!" I bet she was tired of them using her in their gay little arguments to explain why they're doing weird shit instead of just saying they're GAY

"I do all of this for aphmau! I risked my life to protect you so you can help her when im not enough!"

"don't you get it?! I need you with me too, I can't protect our lady without your help! I can't lose you because you're too stupid to see through that metal bucket on your head that you're important too!"

Aphmau, biting a big chunk off of a loaf of bread, whispering to herself: "now kiss..."

(gar and Laur are like cats when they fight... Forehead to forehead, spitting out insults and hisses. Aphmau likes dogs bc of this...)

Time to rant lol

Also would aphmau say Irene in that context? Is it weird for a goddess to use her own name?? Would she just say "oh god!" Or like,, would she say another divine warriors name? Would that be weird too cause Garroth and Travis and ,, technically Aaron have the DW relics? And maybe other characters but I don't remember?

Ngl it's kinda funny to think of her starting to say "dear Edmund! What happened here?!" After she got out of the Irene dimension knowing she's,, got Irene's relic at least,, and keeping it up until Garroth gets out and finds out and he goes ಠಿ⁠_⁠ಠ bc 1- that's not the name most people say, and 2- that's HIS funny religious name

Alt idea: aphmau and Garroth worshipping each other [separately] for actually several reasons now that I think abt it.

So like in this context I mean that aph probably doesn't wanna say her own name (or own god-name cause it's confusing) in that way cause it's strange. It's like saying "oh Kyle!" Every time something scares you. So she'd want to substitute it and she thinks that Edmund is the best option so she starts using his name instead.

(I don't have a good reason bc I! Don't remember ANY divine warrior lore! But I'm pretty sure Edmund is an admirer and is also Cool) (Also bc shad is. Stinky poop man.)

And Garroth is very devoted to Irene in general, I don't think he'd even think of changing the name bc why would you... Unless you were Irene. He hears aph say Edmund and immediately goes ???? Bc that's His Name and also WHAT

BUT there's actually a lot of this happening in canon. Or at least... Canon through my funny "ignore the bad writing" glasses.

Garroth is obvious, he worships Irene, a lot of things about him are related to his relationship with Irene and how he views his worth tied to her. But he also acts the same with aphmau (pre and post relic finding). He loves her, obvs, but he also speaks really highly of her, he never lets people talk shit about her, he believes she's all that is good and is thankful when she appears at the village because she fixes everything up, doesn't immediately believe what the other villagers say about him, and also,, actually makes the village aware again.

He looks up to her a lot and I think it's a really interesting thing to look at. Imagine dedicating your life to this woman as her head guard, basically worshipping her and doing everything she needs without her asking, doing THE most. And then BAM she's actually the god you've worshipped your whole life no big deal guys!

(alt vibe: imagine the resentment he feels towards her when he finds out she's Irene and Irene herself could save him. Ik logically she COULDN'T but man with severe religious anxiety and PTSD coming out of a horribly traumatising experience will not be thinking calmly and clearly and I'd like to see him act out for actual reasons and not,, pissbaby "you chose someone else" and "you're not listening to me!1!1!!!" Reasons)

Anyway back on track, aphmau is kinda similar in this way! She's bright eyed and very socially awkward, doesn't know a lot in general bc she! Has no memory! So when Garroth, a man who knows a lot and also has authority but is still kind and welcoming to her when others aren't, shows her compassion and treats her like a person even when she doesn't feel like one? This is the closest thing she knows to look up to, she knows she wants to be strong and smart and capable and Garroth knows how to do that.

She'd praise him for being a good guard all the time, she risked her life to go on a bunch of random missions to get him the only magic doctor they knew that could heal Garroth and she felt DEVASTATED when the lord (Burt?) Couldn't help. She was prepared to go out and find any way she could to save Garroth because he was all she knew! And like thank Irene the lord had a stupid potion somewhere but ! She was ready to risk everything because she wanted him to live.

All of this to say: aph and Garroth have praise kinks and I will not accept otherwise. CLEARLY Laurence is made for them both and this is where I push my garrencemau propaganda /j

Fr tho I'm always staring a little too hard at the interpersonal relationships in my blorbos shows (because I must begrudgingly include mystreet... For the three pieces of content I like xD) and I love making stupid and frankly "too out there" connections between random things. Fear, for the fools who underestimate my autistic ability to connect two very un connected things will suffer the consequences (aka having to read so many long rants like this)

@panicataphmausinsanity okay so Zane HC's LETS GOOOOOOOO

Before we start trigger warning for like, child abuse and torture and shit. Seriously this gets dark. Zane redemption must come at a price >:D

So. Something interesting to me in regards to Zane is how in MCD, He's like, this evil, terrible human being, but in Mystreet, he's like, a semi functional human being who can be a NOT bad person and NOT do bad things. And so I got to thinking.

I don't think Zane was born a bad person.

Personally, I kind of hate the way Jess wrote Zane. Like, yes, evil for the sake of evil is great and all, but like. In season one and two, Zane was this overarching antagonist who was always one step ahead of the cast and plotting and having a good time being a paice of shit.

And then season 3 comes around and now he's a shadow knight, on the run, has PTSD...

Look, I'm not knocking the guy for having PTSD. I'm just saying that the way it's portrayed kind of makes him seem like a whimpery coward. AGAIN, NOT KNOCKING PTSD!!

I think the position that Zane found himself in season 3 was a PERFECT set up for a redemption arc and it makes me SO MAD that it didn't happen.

So I guess I have to do it myself apparently -_-

I've been thinking a lot about Zane. I don't want him to stop being evil. Not right away. So we keep what happened in the first two seasons the same. He's a cackling maniac that has killed a shit ton of people and is on his father's payroll.

And then he dies.

(skill issue lol)

Anyway, Zane is dead. But he's also Zane, so of course he weasels his way out of being dead. And then he gets tortured and is subjected to the same suffering he condemned so many others to yada yada yada PTSD bleh.

Everything seems to be the same so far.

But then he breaks out if the nether. Still, we're on track, right?

He gets captured, he gets expedited to Phoenix Drop, he gets interrogated, it's all the same.

But here we find a canon divergence. Instead of being absolute dumbasses, they don't bring him into the nether. Let's scrap that plot point entirely.

Instead, we're going to let Zane bake in prison for a while!

Here are the main issues that make Zane irredeemable.

1. He's killed like, a shit ton of people, for funsies ig

2. He killed Vylad.

3. He destroyed Aaron's village.

Let's keep those things in mind.

So he's in prison. While in prison, Garroth starts to visit him (along with Travis but shhhh we'll get to him another day) and just. You know. Be angry.

Garroth has seen Zane as a spoiled brat his entire life. He's always been their father's favorite. He's always had everything handed to him on a silver platter. He's always been willing to do whatever it takes for power. He's greedy. He's psychotic. Garroth hates him.

But Zane is Garroth's brother. And Garroth is the type of golden retriever, gold hearted, kind type of character to still love his brother even if he hates him.

That doesn't mean he goes in and is like, nice to him though. Nope. Garroth goes to visit him and nine times out of ten it devolves into a screaming match where Zane antagonizes him the entire time and Garroth yells at him for being a shitty human being.

And then one day Phoenix Drop is attacked and Zane escapes.

They track him down eventually. When they find him, they strike a deal with him. Due to Irene related shenanigans they need his expertise as a scholar of Irene to figure out some more stuff for Aphmau. In exchange, they'll protect him from the Shadow Lord (who he pissed off by stealing one of his soul fragments lol Zane behavior).

Eventually they're able to establish a rapore with Zane. Garroth still gets a migraine whenever they have a conversation. Vylad still refuses to speak to him (oh btw he's visiting from his nether revolution vacation just so u know) and Aphmau still wants to tear out his guts for killing the love of her life or whatever, but he becomes manageable. They can like, stand him. A little bit. Slightly.

And then Zianna gets kidnapped or whatever. So they go rescue her. But when they get back to Phoenix Drop they forget to mention the fact that Zane is like. There and in the wild and not currently killing entire villages worth of people.

So Zianna rolls up to Phoenix Drop and gets jumpscared by her youngest son and also, notably, Zane is NOT happy to see her. He shuts the front door in her face. It's hilarious even though Garroth doesn't think of it that way.

So, now we have our key players all in one place. Garroth, Vylad, Zane, and Zianna.

Let's say they have to all go find an artifact toghether or something and they need Zianna there because it's related to something she knows and they need Zane there because of Irene lore reasons. they go on this mission. One day, they sit and set up for the night, set up bedrolls, whatever. They're lounging around the fire and talking when Vylad eventually mentions his time as a shadow knight in the nether and something about torture.

Zane blinks, and, having not been included in the conversation initially, buts it to say,

"Oh, please. Don't tell me getting tortured by those amatures was DISTRESSING for you. I would have thought father's methods would have given you thicker skin."

The others bristle and start scolding him, of course, because Zane is like, the reason Vylad became a shadow knight in the first place. But Vylad himself, who is very observant and hard to antagonize, latches into something Zane said.

"Methods? What methods?" He says. He says it sharply, too.

Of course, Zane doesn't pick up on this. He just rolls his eyes.

"Don't tell me you forgot. Father had a whole floor dedicated to torture and loved collecting new methods from around the region. I think he even had a historian employed who would research for him..."

"What?" Garroth says, stunned out of his anger.

Zianna has gone silent. So has everyone else, and now they're watching with baited breaths.

"So what? What would that have to do with me?"

And for the first time that they've ever seen, Zane looks... Puzzled.

"What, did he go easy on you? Didn't you talk back to him all the time? Once, after just asking him a question, he had two of my nails pulled. Shadow Knight torture was child's play in comparison," he shrugs, then takes a bite out of his stale price of bread.

There's silence.

Zane looks back at all of them, confused and now kind of pissed off. He looks like he usually does when he feels like he's about to be scolded for saying something crass. Except, that's not what happens. Instead, Vylad looks him in the eye for the first time since Zane killed him, and with the most emotion they've ever heard from him, says,

"What?"

Zane hums.

"Come on. Don't play dumb. He hated you. Im sure he must have sent you to the "torture basement" at least once. You got on his nerves constantly,"

Garroth makes an aborted movement, like he's going to stand up and rush him, but Vylad stops him with a flick of his hand. And then Vylad starts doing what he does best. Interrogating him.

So remember that list, right? Let's reframe a few things.

Zane was not the favorite child. Garroth was.

Garte was a paice of shit. Garte hated Vylad. But he also hates Zane. Why wouldn't he? Vylad was his wife's affair child, sure, but Zane, Zane was Zianna's spitting image.

When Zane was little, he used to take snails and out them in the grass after it rained. He uses to clamor for his mother's pastries just like his brothers. He was a normal child, and he was NOT born a psychopath.

But Garte had a thought, one day.

Wouldn't it be funny... If he made his wife think he WAS one?

Wouldn't it be funny to punish her that way? Wouldn't it be funny to turn Zane into a terrible person, and have her think it was for no reason? Make her think that she birthed a psychopath? How much would it hurt her? How much would she weep?

Garte used to punish Zane for Vylad's joy. One of Vylad's laughs would equal one slap to the face. One side remark in defence of their mother would equal one hour locked in his father's study closet in his office.

Garte turns Zane against himself brothers. And the best part in his mind?

He makes Zane believe that they know about all of it.

He tells Zane that his mother knows about it. That his brothers don't care that he's beaten. That Vylad does things so he gets punished on purpose.

Zane grows up thinking that his brothers probably go through this too. He grows up thinking that his mother just doesn't love him. And so he doesn't say a thing.

Garte starts having him tortured instead of superficially physically abused? He says nothing.

Garte makes him become a priest of Okasis even though the consequence of failing the academy is death? He says nothing.

Garte would encourage Zane to blugeon animals to death and bring them to Zianna and laugh at her horrified face from afar. Garte encourages Zane to say psychotic things while they're eating dinner, and watches as his family becomes more and more convinced Zane is a monster.

Until Zane is one.

But this reframes a few things.

The people Zane killed? It was under orders. He eventually became his father's right hand man. Most of his overarching goals have been in service of his father.

For Aaron's village, we'll stick a pin in that one, but long story short, Aaron's village had been planning a coup that night under his wife's orders. Zane had them killed under his father's orders so they could eliminate them as political neighbors. He let Aaron live out of pity.

And Vylad.

Basically, remember when I said that Garte used to punish Zane according to Vylad's actions?

One day, Vylad gets into an explosive argument with Garte defending Zianna. And Garte, again, without the other's knowing, has Zane tortured. Except this time it's for a WEEK STRAIGHT.

So when Zane gets out. He's. Very unstable.

And then he comes across Vylad in a semi secluded area.

And Vylad is acting like he did nothing, and all he's ever done is make Zane suffer, and Zane hates him hates him HATES HIM--

And so he snaps. And he kills him.

Keep in mind, though, Zane thinks this is all normal. He doesn't realize that killing his own brother has traumatized him. He doesn't realize that he's a victim of abuse. He doesn't realize that what his dad did is not okay because he THINKS HIS FAMILY KNOWS WHAT HAPPENED, and if they didn't contradict his abuse, then this must be normal. He thinks that Vylad has probably been tortured too. He thinks Garroth is their father's favorite because in his mind he's determined that Garroth not receiving any attention from their father is a GOOD thing because ATTENTION EQUALS TORTURE to him.

And this reframes a few things. His constant bid for power? It's not greed, it's DESPERATION. Power makes him feel safe. Hurting others makes him feel powerful because that's how his father had power over him.

His highly volatile and violent personality? It's l he's ever known. Do you have ANY idea what torture could do to a child? He has severe PTSD. Like, severe and repressed and his outburst are more common when he's uncomfortable or anxious or experiencing any negative emotion, which is often.

Garte took Zane's empathy from him. Turned him against his family. Made him into a monster. With these types of characters, I imagine it would probably be very difficult for them to redevelop their emotions and empathy because if they do that, they would have to face their whole mountain of trauma and the guilt of all the lives they've ruined.

I think eventually, after a lot of work, Zane does eventually regain his empathy. It probably finally sinks in during a small gathering. His mother makes her famous cake. Zane has long gotten used to being excluded during these sorts of things, but then...

His mother slides a plate of cake right in front of him.

Strawberry.

His favorite.

And she smiles at him.

This is probably after they found out about Garte being a peice of shit. Maybe a few months.

All Zane has ever wanted is to be loved. Maybe he didn't know it, but when he takes a bite of his mother's strawberry cake for the first time in decades and the nostalgic taste registers in his brain, something snaps.

And he becomes human again.

And he realizes:

Oh.

I'm a person.

I'm a murderer.

I'm a monster.

LMAO WAS THIS COHERENT SORRY PANIC I TRIED MY BEST I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS ONE OSIBWIBDIBSIBU