#posting headcanons again... (dracula flow voice) the worms are back

[2evran]

now I'm thinking about the cooking/eating habits of all the inquisition crew so I'm ranking them by cooking ability. if this contradicts anything in canon well feel free to ignore it ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

cole: unclear if he eats anything and if he had to feed someone else he'd just be bringing them birdseed and the saucers of milk that people leave out for cats. this *might* improve if he was encouraged to become more human but I'm not convinced (EDIT: he also does this)

cassandra and dorian: both grew up with servants to cook for them so the extent of their culinary ability is probably reconstituting field rations.

sera: could probably be a good cook/baker if she was serious about it but as always the Bit comes first. puts a lot of effort into making disgusting inedible aspic creations, more as a form of self expression than anything else

solas: a mean forager but due to his 1000 year nap frequently forgets that not everyone else enjoys eating pine needles and bark

varric: same as cass and dorian except he can make a sandwich, thus putting him above like 75% of the other inner circle on the "able to feed other people" tierlist

vivienne: literally just that one article about marilyn monroe's diet where she says she drinks two eggs mixed into hot milk every morning plus a multivitamin and every night she broils a steak and eats it with raw carrots. well maybe someone else broils the steak for her but she can definitely manage it herself when on the road

blackwall: this guy can cook. nothing fancy maybe but its definitely cheap filling and good. plus he was kind of born to turn a big roast on a spit over a campfire

the iron bull: actually an extremely good hobbyist baker, can pull off some crazy over the top desserts to feed a crowd. doesn't make a big deal out of it though because he is privately very amused every time someone learns he can make an insane amount of chocolate mousse/trifle/apple crumble/etc.