#post date lost - pre 2008

[lonita]

Blast from the past, pre-2008

These are various bits and pieces from various websites of mine over the years - thoughts, quotations, random crap. I had been including them with my B roll posts, but I think I'll just do a dump and leave it at that. Enjoy!

CURIO CITY: A town dedicated entirely to the joy that is browsing through, and shopping in, dollar stores, bargain shops, and junk emporiums.

BOUNDARY: Borders that you push from the inside out.

I should probably go commit a neatness, but it sounds too much like work.

Side: What the back and front use to keep away from each other.

"The Pope called; he made a nice little joke about taking the dogma for a walk." - Monty Python

I'll tell almost anyone almost anything, but I do it on my dime, in my own time. I don't care how intimately I know a group of people, I do not take kindly to someone else airing my personal business openly, however innocuous it might seem to them.

I love it when people do that indignant and frustrated "are you blind" thing. I can always respond with, "Why yes, as a matter of fact, I am."

The fittest are those who survive on the least.

HRML: Considering the extensive use of emoticons, and other visual cues utilised in the expression of one's thoughts in media where text is the only method of talking, I think we need to consider the implementation of HRML: Hypertext Remarkup Language, used solely and specifically for anything involving inter-human communications.

Things that the universe should make available, in ready supply, in quantities sufficient to meet demand at any time: light bulbs, milk, toilet paper, batteries, little magic pixies that will clean the messes you don't want to clean, the messes you can't see, and the messes you just can't be bothered with.

The biggest problem with cell phones is that now anyone can get a hold of you anytime, anywhere - even when you're sitting in a public toilet.

Every once in a while I wake up in the middle of the night with this creepy, sad feeling that something's amiss or that my fortune fountain has run dry. It's nothing, really. It's just waking up without enough sleep, into a dark place, when one was expecting to wake into the light fully rested. A little tea, a little TV too maybe, a little talk.

The only veggies I won't eat are: eggplant, sweet potato, Brussel sprout, avocado, and any sort of melon. Everything else is pretty much fair game.

TANDEMONIUM: When you cause a ruckus with someone else.

I like Pop Will Eat Itself, poppies, Pop Tarts, popcorn, pop (Coke), and pop-up books.

Every person needs something which will make them stand out, unless they're lucky enough to be "found", which is rare. Some people, you see, keep their jewels well-hidden, out of sight, and it is the rare soul who will stop to take a look, investigate, and stay.

Here's a typical expressive expletive from my birthplace that you're not too likely to hear elsewhere: I don't give a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut.

One of the great philosophical questions of modern times, posed by They Might Be Giants in the song Particle Man, is: When he's under water does he get wet, or does the water get him instead?

"Whatever your heart clings to, that is your god." - Unknown

"No Christian martyr works it harder!" - Joan of Arc, Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical

"Space can contain everything, but space does not entertain the thought that it can contain everything." - Nirvana Sutra

"For in the dew of little things, the heart finds its morning and is refreshed." - Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

"Animals are nature's way of keeping meat fresh until you eat it." - Den

In my world, Elvis is not the king of rock'n'roll. He's not even prince, duke, prime minister, mayor, or town drunk.

When I was a young child, and not understanding the working of technology, I used to think that if I turned off the radio in the middle of a song that the same song would start up from where I left it, when I turned the radio back on again, regardless of how much time had passed.

If you rearrange the letters of the word shelf, you get flesh. Which gives a whole new spin to the expression shelf space; but perhaps only to those of us who need to be taken to the puzzle factory in a rubber truck.

Mithraism had a baptism-like ceremony which involved the man crouching in a pit while a bull was slaughtered on boards above his head.

There is no future in time travel.

If I could meet a man that sounded not entirely unlike some unholy combination of Joe Strummer, Ian McCulloch, Derek Jacobi, Christopher Eccleston, and Patrick Stewart … well, I actually have very little idea what I'd do, but it sure would be wonderful listening to the poor bugger talk. Some people have voices that just resonate, voices that hum.

Sometimes I think that there's some things one has to do when one is young, or it becomes impossible to even dream that they will ever happen.

We understand when the sky is grey or red, why it is so. But, on the blue days … how is it the sky goes from its sharp cerulean, to Wedgewood, to what it is now - the pale edges of faded denim; a blue that's almost forgotten its blueness, but hasn't quite.

What's the most precious thing you have? Time, right? So why is it we will gladly give up hours and hours of time, of our lives, of our selves, but we all turn a bit funny in the gills when it comes to borrowing money, or lending it? Is it because we see money as a symbol of time, more precious than the time itself?

I believe that any person who claims atheism and says they hate God (or the idea of god), is no atheist at all. Hatred of a thing is not the negation of that thing; hatred is actually a pretty powerful emotion that gives something power.

I love it when people do that indignant and frustrated "are you blind" thing. I can always respond with, "Why yes, as a matter of fact I am."

"If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid." - Epictetus

I love navel oranges. Let me rephrase that in more easily understood and precise terms: I love navel oranges. There is no better or tastier fruit on earth, though seedless green grapes could give the navel orange a run for its fruity money. I could eat the damned things by the pound, and have (not like the time when I was young and unconsciously ate two litres of lime sherbet whilst watching Dr. Who).

NUKEROMANCER: Someone whose entire concept of meal preparation is confined to the "defrost", "power", and "cook" buttons.

"I never make mistakes. I make predictions which immediately turn out to be wrong." - Murray Walker

Abundance: agile bread.

There are times you become something, evolve into something, not because it's how you want to be or how you're truly meant to be, but because you're driven there out of necessity.

Zentrance: One day I'll come up with a clever definition for this word. For now, all I can say is that I like the sound of it.

What song do you want played at your funeral? Well, this would involve people going against my "end" wishes. But, assuming they do that, I'd prefer Always Look On The Bright Side of Life, Fearless (Pink Floyd), or perhaps, the Ode to Joy. I am a soppy sentimentalist.

There's nothing worse than getting gassed by someone else's perfumery of choice - especially when it's so thick you can taste it.

"A moral compass can only point you in the right direction; it can't make you go there." - Gil Grissom, CSI

I'm very, very particular about the sort of pens I like to write with. I'm very fond of very fine-tipped rollerball pens - the blacker and thinner the better, and they must have black ink. I think high school was what finally turned me off of blue ink - I almost hate it, and find it grating on the eyes. Black seems more definite, and it's sure as hell easier to read. I wonder how it is blue became the "accepted" colour.

The impossible is sometimes the unwise, but I am not afraid of attempting the unwise. I have done it before, and I'm certain I'll do it again.

"I exist as I am, that is enough." - Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass

Someone, I can't recall who at the moment, once said that diplomacy was the art of letting other people have your way.

Freak out now. Apologise later.

Pocket change of heart shaped box lunch time of the seasons in the sun always shines on TV dinner hour of power trip report card games without frontiers…

o/~ I need your fingers to straighten my flesh / I hope your fingers are kind o/~ - James, Walking the Ghost

MAULTITUDE: Roman hands and Russian fingers, people who just can't keep their hands off you, groups of people engaging in orgiastic behaviour, perhaps could apply to flocks of hookers.

The only thing worse than some raving, reactionary, political asswipe, is a drunk, raving, reactionary, political asswipe.

The young may have more infectious energy, fire, or immediate heat, but age brings warmth, knowledge, and a more sustained heat that feeds a more enduring sense of passion, and a better ability to understand and accept the vagaries of humans and human existence.

My imaginary friend when I was little was called Charlie Brokentoaster. He was not a toaster.

Last week, I couldn't find my wallet. It had about $30 in it. When I realised it was gone, I tried to work myself up into being upset about it, but it wasn't coming off. Then I realised something, that I was trying to work myself into an upset because I thought that's how I was supposed to feel about losing it. I wasn't upset about it being gone at all, so I ditched the mood immediately. The wallet turned up not long after.

I'm not sure what I thought it was before, but I was surprised the day I found out that the vagina was a tube. I was young. What can I say?

Tiberius "My dear, you look like a Greek tragedy." Agripina "And you look like a Roman farce." - I, Claudius

"Don't try to lay no boogie woogie on the king of rock'n'roll." - Long John Baldry

Beware the many evils of man; that amongst these evils exists the following: overreaction, retaliation, ignorance, reactionaryism, accusation, jingoism, moral superiority, hypocrisy, propaganda, misinformation, groundless speculation, knee-jerkness, jerkiness, finger-pointing, blame-laying, narrow-mindedness, fuckheadedness, internalisation, gun-toting lunacy, anal retentiveness, blindness, non-thinking, non-analysation, selfishness, wilful self-torture, arrogance, lies, baseless specialisation, self-indulgence, bait-laying, tension aggravation, revenge, tabloidism, bigotry festering, narrow perspective, extremism, fanaticism

Most of life's problems can be solved by at least one of the following: ale, whores, cookies, Aqua Net, fire

FYI: Talking louder does not make you sound smarter. However, it will get you the one thing you're really after: attention.

There's nothing wrong with being humbled sometimes.

My most terrifying childhood memory is being on the elevator alone when the power in the building went out. I refused, for years afterwards, to be the first person on, or the last person off, the elevator.

Education is a society's responsibility. If it takes no trouble to ensure a knowledge base and teaching systems for its people, then it has no one but itself to blame when those people fail to be able to contribute.

How many olives do you have to eat in one sitting before it turns from a snack into an unhealthy obsession?

When my grandfather died, I was present when they put him in the body bag. They put him in face down so the last thing visible of him, was his bare butt. I thought that was the funniest thing I'd ever seen. The last thing that man showed to the world was his ass. It was too poetically appropriate for words.

Two things of which one should constantly remind oneself, and which have nowt to do with each other: Some prices are worth paying. and Consider the source.

I have no problem with charities or charity. In fact, I consider it my responsibility not to refuse people in need. However, I do have a problem with charitable groups who call me, and keep calling me, despite my having told them, repeatedly, that I cannot afford the extravagantly costly "perks" they're offering in order to get my money.

Whatever your heart clings to, that is your god.

Rah rah + Amen = Rahmen

The human emotional system is like a pot luck stew - you never know what the hell the next spoonful is going to bring you.

When does pizza officially become "leftover"? Personally, I feel it's not technically leftover until it's at least a day old. But what about, say, twelve hours after purchase and original consumption? Is it leftover then?

"Nothing in life has any business being perfect." - Henry, The Lion in Winter, 2003

"I'll miss the sea, but a person needs new experiences. They jar something deep inside, allowing him to grow. Without change something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken." Duke Leto Atreides, Dune, 1984

My friend Max once bought a can of pop with something called "pant acid" in it. Yeah, I'm still wondering too.

If there's no rest for the wicked, I must be one evil bastard.

I remember, years ago, hearing some story that said we are, now, breathing in the same air that men like Julius Caesar, Socrates, and Jesus, exhaled. One of my first thoughts at the time was, "I bet that's not all we're breathing in of theirs."

Why is it, do you suppose, that those responsible for the programming arrangements on television, assume that everyone must have enough of a life that they don't care what's there in the way of weekend programming? As the years roll by, the programming on weekends gets worse and worse. Some of us don't have lives, you know. On behalf of those of us without lives, I demand higher quality programming for weekend viewing!

Eat well; drink with good cheer; be appreciative of your gifts; give well if you can; be sincere in your wishes.

Have you ever noticed that ruination and urination are a wee (no pun intended) too much alike in spelling?

You stock up on things, like toilet paper and light bulbs, yet you always manage to run out of your stockpile at the moment when you're least able to go and replenish it. Yet another fine example of the true perversity of the universe.

I was just thinking back on how much, as kids, my friends and I liked to play school. Which is really amusing given how much we hated actually going to the real thing half the time.

If a passing spaceship pulled over and offered you a ride, under what circumstance (if any) would you accept? If I needed a lift, I'd go. If I felt adventurous, I'd go. If I was at all curious, I'd go. I guess it wouldn't take much to get me to go, since I'm most of the above most of the time.

I don't have nightmares, but I do have unpleasant dreams. I loathe them, truth be told, I'd rather have the nightmares. With my unpleasant dreams they usually lave me in some sort of bizarre mood, detached, unhappy, deflated, flattened, ill at ease, unsettled, paranoid and unsure of myself and others. They are always creepy, deflating, or grotesque. I'd rather have the nightmares.

People spend far too much time looking for A Fulfilling Career that will meet all of their financial, creative, and personal needs. It'd be nice, but that sort of thing happens very rarely. I don't need it, anyhow. I want a job. I don't need my work world to fulfil me, I need "me" to fulfil me; I need me to fulfil my life. Of course I don't want a job I hate; but one I can tolerate, that pays the bills, and allows for personal time, would be sufficient.

"To forget one's purpose is the commonest form of stupidity." - Friedrich Nietzsche

I actually like cleaning windows.

"It is just an illusion we have here on earth that one moment follows another one, like beads on a string, and that once a moment is gone it is gone forever." - Kurt Vonnegut Slaughterhouse Five

There's only one way to find a needle in a haystack - the same way you find one you've just dropped on a shag rug - walk through it barefoot.

If my soul were forced to survive on chicken soup alone, it'd starve.

There's not too much that I require of a morning outside of a cup of tea, except that people not yammer at me. It's part of why I find most radio morning shows so ghastly and intolerable, because all they do is yammer, yammer, yammer.

Visists: The extreme reluctance, and sometimes resistance, one feels when one realises that it's time to go visit people you really don't want to visit.

Say it with flowers. Send her a triffid.

"Speak in extremes - it will save you time." - Jason

I used to be offended at my mother's husband for keeping my existence a secret from his parents, and for seemingly forcing her to also do so. But then one day I realised that she chose to allow him to do that, and my offense moved.

Carrots are good for your eyes - but it hurts when you push 'em in.

I stole a pack of gum when I was about eight, but felt so guilty about it afterwards that I left the pack on the windowsill outside the store.

It doesn't matter what you're made of; it matters what you make of yourself.

"To think is to forget differences, generalise, make abstractions." - Jorge Luis Borges

Harrod's in London has a really tacky shrine to Dodi and Diana near the Egyptian Escalator. What was worse, however, were the tourists who stood there taking photos of it.

30 seconds at a microphone addressing the people of the world. What do you say? Life's too short to spend so much time being petty over things that, in the grand scheme of things, matter not one whit.

Remember a few years back when John Glen went up in space again? Why wasn't everyone dressed in ape suits when he came back down again?

Secrets: Those things best kept to onself, and that no longer exist when you share them with another.

Sometimes there are things in places you never expect them to be. Sometimes there are things in places you knew you'd always find them. Sometimes all it takes to begin something, is a beginning.

Movies I've seen with Peter O'Toole in them: King Ralph (1991), Last Emperor, The (1987), Club Paradise (1986), Pygmalion (1983), Svengali (1983), My Favorite Year (1982), Masada (1981), Man of La Mancha (1972), Murphy's War (1971), Goodbye, Mr. Chips (1969), Lion in Winter, The (1968), Casino Royale (1967), What's New, Pussycat (1965), Lawrence of Arabia (1962)

"The untold want by life and land ne'er granted. Now, voyager sail thou forth to seek and find." - Walt Whitman

In the winter, when it's frigid here, and I'm hating it, I like to check the temperatures in places like Yellowknife and the Berring Strait. I don't feel so bad about the cold after that.

DISREMEMBERED: When you've mentally misplaced something that you actually do know.

There's three sides to every story: Your side, my side, and the truth.

The Exorcist was the last movie my grandfather ever took my grandmother to see. Immediately afterwards, he made her give away the brand new set of green glasses she'd just bought.

Ever notice how weatherpeople discuss the risk of weather, as if we had some choice in the matter, as if one could spin the wheel and get no weather at all?

"I am more important than my problems." - Jose Ferrer

Tragedy tries so hard to harden us - but the real trick is not letting it do so.

When I was a small child (and an adult), I always wanted a rubber duckie. I never got one. So, now, as an adult, people give me duckies as gifts. Still, no one's given me a proper yellow squeaky one as yet.

I didn't learn how to tie my own shoes until I was into grade one.

I understand the whole concept of wind chill, more or less, but I think that after a certain point giving it a numerical value is beyond useless. Once it goes -20C or lower, you're pretty much in "way too fucking cold for humans" territory.

I find that as I get older, I am far less resolute about certain things than I was in my adamant youth. Some things have charms they never had before, enjoyment is less judgemental in its scope, and I have embraced the ability and desire to do things I wouldn't normally do, simply because they're there to be done, or because someone else wants to do them. There is enjoyment to be had in just about everything, even things you never used to find the charm in.

Des phoques par-ci, des phoques par-là, les phoques partout!

"What else could ugliness ever come out of, if not beauty?" - Tom Kirkwood, Night Heat

I figure the perfect curry dish to honour Tim Curry, would be curried frankenfurters.

Riesling Splese sounds more like a dysfunction than a wine.

"Speak in extremes; it will save you time." - Jason

Finannigans: Financial trickery, con-games, corporate wheeling and dealing

Well some say life will beat you down Break your heart, steal your crown So I've started out for God knows where I guess I'll know when I get there - Learning to Fly Tom Petty

In my world, Elvis is not the king of rock'n'roll; he's not even prince, duke, prime minister, mayor, or town drunk.

I said that I wanted to make a cake with the Yin-Yang on the top, and call it my Zen Ice-Cream Koan cake. People said there was a special hell reserved just for folks like me.

You never seem to get enough sleep the nights before you have to be doing something that requires all your undivided, fully slept attention.

AUCTION: To allow everyone to fight over buying your stuff.

MEANDERTHAL: An annoying individual moving slowly and aimlessly in front of another individual who is in a bit of a hurry.

Why is drinking American beer like making love in a canoe? Because they're both fucking close to water. (favourite Monty Python joke)

The enemy of my enemy is not my friend.

I am sick to death of everything being acronymised. Are people that lazy that they can't say a whole fucking word? It's only a few more letters! Are you lot afraid your lives will end before you get the second syllable out?

I was remembering the old five and dimes, as my grandmother would call them, and the sort of lunch counters one found in department stores before they all over-incorporated corporations. All this incorporation removes any sort of charm. But that's a story for another day. The thing I most remember from those places, are the rows of pre-made sandwiches, and the bowls of vari-coloured Jello, all topped with whipped cream (the Jello, not the sandwiches). Out of all the things I could remember, it's that, the dishes of Jello.

"Man is a giddy thing and this is my conclusion." - William Shakespeare

I cannot explain the film Brazil except in this fashion: When it first came out, a group of friends and I went to see it. After it was over we all got up to leave when the house lights came on, all of us except Carlos. Carlos was still sitting there, staring at the screen, with his mouth hanging open, agape, gobsmacked. He didn't even hear us when we called him.

I, quite frankly, have no idea how it is that some people seem to find it much easier to use bad spelling/grammar than proper spelling/grammar, even when it comes to text messages. I cringe when I find myself using a txtism.

I once purchased a copy of Bon Jovi's Slippery When Wet for a friend, not knowing she already had it. I got stuck with it. I still have it. It's still in the paper wrapper the store put it in. That was over 15 years ago.

Ferment: Yield to the state in which something becomes a better grade of being, like going from potato to vodka. Sugars, baby, it's all in the sugars.

I didn't learn how to tie my own shoes until I was well into grade one.

If I'd known it was going to be this hard to quit smoking, I'd have chosen to do something far less painful, confusing, and tough … like learn calculus.

My mother owns one of those very tiny breed of poodles - a steak probably weighs more than this dog does. Someone I know said that because the dog was so tiny it was no better than a barking cat toy.

I used to have a bad habit of misplacing my beverages. I would make cups of tea and forget them all the time. I'd find them hours after, all over the apartment; in the bedroom, bathroom, dining area, and wonder how the hell they got there, because I sure as hell didn't remember going near the places I'd find them.

Never summon what you can't banish.

Social security: The mistaken impression that society is going to take care of its own.

"Where I had learned the idea of absence, I was beginning to learn the idea of trace. There is always something left behind. That is the essential paradox. Even abandonment gives us memory." - Robert Kroetsch

Is a vulgar Parisian obseine?

DAYTRITUS: Little bits of thoughts and impressions and happenings that occur throughout one's day; particularly applicable when one is writing them down in an online journal, for example, and not a single one feels like it justifies having a whole post to itself, but a whole bunch together make up a nice little post in sum.

"I am human, so nothing human is strange to me." - Publius Terentius Afer

FORSOCKEN: Like forsaken, only with a higher natural fibre content.

Life does not have meaning because you fill it up; life has meaning because it fills you up.

Skyscraping: I wonder if that would leave a cirrus wound?

The only veggies I won't eat are: eggplant, sweet potato, brussel sprout, avocado, and any sort of melon. Everything else is pretty much fair game.

Changing, as a person, often involves admitting that you were wrong. Lots of people are too proud to admit that they were wrong. That is why some people never change.

The wind's blowing around outside. Rain winds by the sounds of it. They sound cooler, deeper, wetter. The leaves of trees rustle differently.

Someone asked recently what the oddest things I've ever eaten are. The list includes octopus, squid, alligator, pigeon, frog legs, pine tree seeds, homemade Jamaican rum, and RIT dye powder. The rum could have stripped the paint off the side of a barn at a hundred paces, and the RIT dye was something I did when I was five years old. I thought it was jello powder. The pigeon, by the way, was very tasty as I recall. No, it's not those grey and white buggers that invade the inner city.

As I grew up, anything that couldn't be seen, anything that was invisible or out of the range of human vision, was - according to my grandfather - skybluepink.

I'm a girl who really knows where her towel is.

Demanding rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!

There are three sides to it - one like ice cream, another like the ocean, and the last is like an autumn day of crisply coloured leaves. These things work in concert, rather than being contrary to each other. They serve to fill a palette with rich flavour; tang and sweet at the same time. Tang and sweet and fresh and mellowed.

AU FRIGO: What some French people hear when you say "Off we go". True story. My mother had a friend who thought this.

I'm so poor I can't even pay attention.

"You're a gentleman and a scholar, and I'm not much better myself." One of those random things my grandfather used to say that rang very much of Oscar Wilde or Groucho Marx, but was neither.

It took me years to figure out a way to reason the phrase "a month of Sundays".

My grandmother was a little surprised, to say the least, when I explained to her that the nice song they were playing in the background of that Swiffer commercial (Whip It by Devo) was about masturbation.

Despite the fact that space is nothing, it's the very thing that connects us all to each other.

There's nothing quite like the neverending surprise of the start of Brain Damage/Eclipse, when one is listening to Pink Floyd's Dark Side Of The Moon.

People always ask you what you do for fun as if fun things are supposed to somehow be completely separate from everything else you do. As if work, home, friends, family, and play, are not meant to intermingle. I find that sad, the lengths to which some folks go to compartmentalise their existence.

I like verbal communication. I like hearing voices - not just the ones in my head.

Possibly the most insightful thing anyone's ever said about me, was that I was very good at talking about myself without saying anything. It's true.

Friday, the day of sharp excitement at the weekend and rest to come; Saturday, the day of hobbies and shopping and touring around; and Sunday, the day of somnolence and soporifics.

I'll say one thing for myself. When drunk, I may be embarrassing, but I'm not mean, loud, or vicious.

I can please only one person a day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow doesn't look too good either.

I very much dislike people who try to make me stressed and reactionary simply because they are.

Every day a person should have: an infusion of hope and optimism, a little surprise, a little variety, a little activity, to feel safe, contentment, peace, stability, a little healthy chaos, relief from that which hurts them, imaginative play, relaxation, pampering, a good meal, something that makes them feel alive and human, gentleness and kindness, appreciation, affection, a little creativity, something that keeps the brain active, some attention, a little inspiration, something emotionally stimulating, something (hopefully non-tragic) that reminds you not to take things for granted, something to make them smile, hug, a good night's sleep, a little love

Raisin: A grape that's seen better days.

"Collecting is a primal phenomenon of study: the student collects knowledge." - Walter Benjamin

Schrödinger's Cat: That's only half the story.

People who say things like "Is it hot enough for you?" need to have something large and incongruous rammed in a place where the sun does not normally shine.

"The absence of love is the worst suffering there is." - Unknown

Brown is not attractive when it's paper bag brown, and nothing in a person's home should ever be that colour, except paper bags.

Axl Rose and Gwen Stefani sing like they're gagging on their own tongues

I wear glasses, and have done so since I was two years old. I have no issue with this. It's simply a matter of course. Other people have more of an issue with it than I do. I refuse, therefore, to be made to feel badly for something that is a matter of existence, by people who can't handle or accept the tiniest imperfection in others.

Conversations are best when one person isn't left to hold the bag, bounce the ball, and cart the hors, all by themselves.

Ever wonder why the hell we have to return our seats to the upright position? I'd rather die laying down, thanks.

I really dislike people who don't take the hint of monosyllabic responses. Normally, this would indicate to anyone paying attention that, a) their audience doesn't want to hear about it, b) their audience doesn't want to hear about it "right now", or c) their audience really doesn't give a fuck, and is becoming quickly frustrated at being repeatedly and continually forced to listen to endless ramblings that will - should the speaker not stop soon - cause the audience to utter a very vociferous and emphatic "Would you please shut the fuck up?"

"Your generosity is only exceeded by your good looks." - my grandfather

Definition of the Commercialisation of Zen: Getting something for no-thing.

There's little that's more satisfying than a good sneeze.

Eating the North American restaurant concept of a fair portion size, makes me feel like something that's being fatted up to be taken out for slaughter. My friends, small portions don't mean you're getting ripped off.

Preference is a choice one makes via investigation: "I have tried many things, and prefer this one over that one." Preference is only a priori when categorical decisions are made without investigation, without evidence, without thought.

Fair shake: If you expect it, then you should also give it, and everyone is deserving of it.

CUCUMBERSOME: A very large salad.

I've always found a way to keep myself harboured and sheltered from the very things that I probably most need. And some of those things are frightening, unsettling, things that jam into my gullet and gut and waggle their fingers and scare me to death.

I can curse in at least ten languages other than English, though my talents there are by no means scant. Amongst the more exotic of these languages are: Finnish, Hungarian, and Italian. My best cursing is done in French, however.

Given that I'm an atheist, and in good conscience couldn't swear on the Bible if called as a witness at a trial, on what would I swear? The OED? The Tao Te Ching? A box of Trivial Pursuit cards? A first edition Shakespeare folio?

Please to be remembering that this household's theme song is "I Do The Rock" by Tim Curry.

What more could you ask for in life than a companion who lets you finish your sentences.

"I occasionally spoke in these creative meetings of the 'tragedy' of my time, and the 'moral cowardice' of my generation. There has been no great bomb since that last one dropped on Japan, but there has been a steady erosion of what is natural. As my art school mentor Gustav Metzger says, "nature has been replaced by 'environment'. We no longer know the true values of natural life and art. We are slowly destroying ourselves in an 'autodestructive' society." - Pete Towsnhend, from the introductory notes to Lifehouse

BUREAUCRAZY: Because that's what the government does to you.

Deserve: respect, affection, attention, love, hugs, not to have my time wasted, honesty, truth, communication, sharing

I think my favourite translation of an actual line from a Hong Kong martial arts film would have to be; "I am damned unsatisfied to be killed in this way!"

Zen state: When you can have both tea and no tea at the same time.

What did you first do for money?: Chores. Didn't we all? I once tried telephone sales as a teen, and I'm of the opinion that doing telephone sales is more traumatising than something that's usually incredibly traumatising.

There's too much 'white noise' in the lives of most people, so all these little things get drowned out. Plus, some have simply forgotten how to appreciate smallness, in a society so hung up on the grandiose.

I'll say one thing for myself; when drunk I may be embarrassing, but I'm not mean, loud, or vicious.

DISREMEMBER: I didn't forget. I just failed to remember.

Every once in a while I get the feeling that various musicians can see right through me.

Conversations are best when one person isn't left to hold the bag, bounce the ball, and cart the horse, all by themselves.

Ratification: It does not happen with real rats, and I should not say it does during a documented pubic meeting.

I wonder if Charles Mingus ever thought of the fact that his last name sounds more like genitalia than a name?

What I like to say when I either have nothing to say or don't want to respond: Lovely weather we're having. Beautiful plumage.

MALLEGE: The sort of educational "institution" that is more focused on making money than teaching, that one finds on stray street corners and in strip malls. Usually, out of cheap, fast, and reliable, one gets to pick two. In the case of the mallege, you get one - and it's not cheap or reliable.

I'm trying to work out ways of incorporating the immortal words of Marlon Brando into my everyday, or almost everyday, speech: "A one-way ticket to palookaville."

A godist is any person espousing a Christian faith, or believing in any form of a Christian deity. Any person who believes in God.

Lonnie: If you call me that, I'll unseam you from nave to chops with a blunt butter knife.

There are rare times when lies serve, but not when you leave someone in an ignorance that fails to serve them.

You always pay a price for profound gifts. They don't come free or cheaply.

When you are first getting ill the feelings of illness sometimes come and go, and can often be staved off with a good nap. The crapteau, the plateau of crappy, is that point at which you realise you need another nap because you can't fight the illness off any longer.

There are some things I just can't bear to throw away or get rid of in any fashion - like music, or books, and especially personal writing. Throwing

Nothing is so close to breaking, as when it refuses to bend.

I have discovered the one true catalyst for insanity: A radio station that plays nothing but Christmas music twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, for the entire month of December.

How come we never saw this on Polka Dot Door: o/~ This is the time we always say, "Get ready, get set, for Judgement Day: o/~

Disagreement with an opinion does not make someone an enemy.

Victorian Housewife Syndrome: Unfortunate condition in which a person feels that their efforts go completely unnoticed and unsung, or even deliberately ignored; also a condition in which people feel completely left out of a loop that they had a large hand in starting.

"There's no god, no rules, and no judgements except for those you accept or create for yourself." - Unknown

For me, I think one of the worst feelings in the world is knowing you've done something wrong, and knowing, too, that you will not be allowed to make amends for it.

Laundry is just such a time-suck, and I'm of the opinion that garbage should take itself out.

It's said that if your nose is itchy it means you're going to kiss a fool. My right ear and my left cheek are itchy; what do you suppose that'd get me in the kiss commodities market?

Once in a while I come across things I'd got for a specific purpose that never ended up getting used for that purpose. Most of the time this means nothing. But every once in a while I find something that touches a nerve, twigs my nostalgia, or aches. Today it was a Chinese parasol that I'd purchased a few months ago, which made me think of the reason I'd bought it. Now it will be decoration, something to help brighten my home. I don't think it'll ever be used for the original intention.

Don't speak for me when you can't even let me finish a sentence.

I remember once someone bitching about this film, saying it was far too simplistic, that the philosophy was too easy, etc. And I'm thinking, uh, they're teenagers, were you expecting Kierkegard or something?

I figure the perfect curry dish to honour Tim Curry would be curried frankenfurters.

Hey poor, you don't have to be poor anymore - unless you're dealing with Revenue Canada who are not entirely unlike waiting for cold molasses to roll uphill in January.

THC: Tim Hortons Campaign: grabbing overly thin women off the street and stuffing them with timbits until they explode.

If there's a better, or more versatile, alcohol on this planet, I sure as hell don't know what it is.

Brown is not attractive when it's paper bag brown, and nothing in a person's home should ever be that colour, except paper bags.

I used to be one of those people who took everything very personally. This caused me no end of trauma. This kept happening until the day I realised that if someone treats me poorly or without respect, in any fashion, it said a lot more about them than it said about me.

Do you have any idea what it's like for the eminently impatient to be patient with the most difficult item they face, themselves?

Sometimes the tools, trappings, and talent, mean nothing; sometimes the desire is all there is, and all there should be.

What makes a person a poet is not words, it is vision, perception, relation with the world around the person.

Don't hold back - release the frolic within!

"Nothing unreal exists." - Spock, Star Trek: IV

Despite how much you might dislike bullshit, every once in a while you have to let people lie to you without comment, so that they have the opportunity to preserve their dignity.

"Stand before the people you fear and speak your mind - even if your voice shakes. When you least expect it, someone may actually listen to what you have to say." - Maggie Kuhn

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? I don't know, I wasn't there.

It's at this point in your cleaning that you think, "Why didn't I leave it all alone?" or, "Why can't I be Mary Poppins?" or, "I wish I could hire someone to clean it for me." or, "Never again."

I've been trying to recall how and when I first learned about sex, and I can't. I remember the cartoon 'My Mom's Having A Baby', and some booklet about the menstrual cycle. But I really can't figure out how and when I learned the naming and usage and connection of parts. I know I wasn't 'sat down and had a talk with'. That's something my grandparents would never have done, and am I ever thankful for that. My grandmother still thinks virgins shouldn't use tampons.

I like a nice hat, or a silly one. Hat-wearing is a dying art, methinks. The fedora, the bowler, they're going the way of the dodo bird, and that's a truly saddening event.

"The living are just the dead on holiday." - Unknown

Guys, trust me on this one: If you're starting to experience the wonder of the receding hairline, just take it all off. In most cases, you'll be doing yourself a favour.

I have discovered that there is a truly unfortunate thing about this time of year, autumn and thence unto winter. The temperature has a very bad habit of becoming non-warm. This bothers me. I am trying to discover what to do about it. I'm still waiting to be able to afford that temperature controlled bio dome I've been talking about. But that's another problem altogether: the unfortunateness (Unfortunateness? Bless the diversatility of the Englitch language.) of non-having of money.

A friend of the family, when I was a young lass, used to say "Up your giggy with a wire brush" an awful lot. It was not an expression of warm friendliness. It occurs to me, decades later, that I'm not sure if she meant the front or the back - though I am positive she meant the lower functioning portion of the human body. (What a weird expression.)

"The words of the tongue should have three gatekeepers: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?" Arabian proverb

Some things are momentary, and some feel forever. Both can be delicious, or excruciating.

"It's like spring at MASH; if you can't find it, and you can't feel it, you just go ahead and make it." - Sydney, MASH

Did you know that the plural of cul de sac is culs de sac, not cul de sacs? Sometimes English boggles my noodle, but, this expression isn't English.

The second worst thing you can say about someone, is that they're a poor sport. The worst thing you can say is that they're a liar or hypocrite.

Teasles: I really enjoy a good cup of tea. It's unfortunate that I'm mostly incapable of making one, and must suffice with my substandard hack version of a cup of tea.

Shoebox: A repository of memories.

I think that it's in small acts that humans really prove themselves and give credibility to what we term as humanity.

"Real life is overrated. It's just a lot of odd smells and disappointments." - Ben Calder, Chasing Liberty

Most of the time, the grandest gestures come in the smallest packages.

TEASED: What you feel like after you drink a much anticipated, needed, or waited for cup of tea that invariably turns out to taste like boot mud.

A goddess of disturbed tranquillity.

Sometimes finding solace or simpatico in another is all human existence adds up to, all that it brings to anyone. That is not a bad thing, to find solace, understanding, someone with whom you can be at ease because you know they understand your fears, desires, and detritus, and they accept it all.

If you want fairness, be fair. If you want equality, treat others equally.

Do you think that 'meaning' is something you discover, something you create, something imposed by others, or something else? It's all those things. All those things create meaning - how you see a thing, how others see a thing, how that thing might see itself. All of it combines to give a significance or a sense to a thing.

In the past, people have found my website by searching for: stuff eggs into tomatoes, overweight naked men, lady bitch, tickle my feet, lemonade lady, her uvula, migraines caused by lungs, worms in the nipple, free flesh flicks, testicles, christcore, naked Disney characters, diamond ring seahorse, cats lesbian sex, net feet, ate worms in chocolate, oestrogen vasodilation migraine, chick vices, dildo log, lesbian letters, freak dick, free masturbation films, turn offs earwax, slinky limerick, animals sexy sides, free fuck flicks, free naked animal sex, tender testicles

Free is good. I especially like when you buy something, and they give you another thing with it. The freeness may be illusory, but it feels free, so I accept it as such. Sometimes, though, I wonder how certain things end up together in "free offer" pairings. Like the free long distance phone card I got in my box of frozen fish.

I prefer crossing my toes to crossing my fingers. That way, I can still type.

(Content warning: Gross) One day I got this chocolate bar from the grocery store, one of the family sized ones. I opened it, ate some, relished it (of course), then looked at what was left in the wrapper only to see little, green worms.

What do you do when vending machines steal your money? I make a face at them, possibly give them the finger, and then resign my money to coin-slot perdition

STINK FISH POT! One wonders whose job it was to contrive the colourful array of expletives employed by Frank Burns on MASH. One should, of course, pronounce this expletive string as if it were all one word.

You have to, for the greater part, solve your own problems. You have to take the step, cross the bridge, open the door, let in the light. No one else is going to do this for you. You have to be your own saviour. It makes you stronger in the end. Another thing that makes you stronger, is owning yourself - good and bad; taking responsibility for your actions, admitting your faults, embracing all sides of yourself.

Thinking not just forwards or backwards, it's to the left, around corners, backward, upsidedown, inside out.

I still can't remember which is near-sighted and which is far-sighted.

I lament the fact that I never got to see AC/DC, Pop Will Eat Itself, Pink Floyd, The Beatles, and The Who.

Breathing is good. I'm going to make a habit of it.

I am convinced that my sometimes stellar ability at, and appreciation of, sarcasm was first seeded by my grandfather.

FANTASTY: When you can't be certain if what's causing the butterflies in your stomach is thoughts of your current paramour, or the fact you haven't eaten since breakfast.

The odd thing, is that when "perfect for you" comes around the corner and trips you up of a morning, it is never what you thought it would be, yet … it is exactly as it should be.

The world of worry is packed enough without borrowing more than you should rightly borrow to stuff it with.

If it can wait til morning, don't wake me up.

Even when it isn't cold, the wind, when howling through loose windows, always sounds cold. It reminds me of what desolation might feel like - like the sound of the loon's call. Sometimes it's somewhat nice, because it reminds me that I'm tucked up inside in a snug place, with tea, and snacks, and television to keep me company. Sometimes it makes for a lonely feeling, but not today.

What is the square root of all evil?

The impossible is sometimes the unwise; but I am not afraid of attempting the unwise. I have done it before, and I'm certain I'll do it again. Sometimes that's the only way to get the juice out of life.

"Say it with flowers. Send her a triffid." - Unknown

Bad things about people are like conspiracies; if that's all you look for, that's all you're going to find.

I will not lie about my age. Own your age - make them take you as you are.

After I saw the Disney film Blackbeard's Ghost I wouldn't walk straight up to my bed if the lights in my room were out. I'd get to about a foot away from it then jump the rest of the way. That little problem lasted for a few years. And people say Disney films are harmless.

My Aunt Marie used to say that a person needs 17 hugs a day to survive. I'm not so sure she was in any way wrong.

Wouldn't it be wonderful to believe that pulpectomy was the removal of pulp from your orange juice, thus rendering it fit for human consumption? Sadly, it is not, nor does it have anything to do with oranges at all.

My passport states that it is the property of the government of Canada. This is fine, but if that's the case, why the hell did I have to pay for it?

I should remember much more frequently than I do, that there are some things in life you will never find, get, or have, unless you go out into the world and expose yourself to the means by which you will find, get, or have whatever it is you need.

Anarchart: Just do it.

I used to think, when I was younger, that if I wasn't the best at something, then my life was not complete. I learned, years later, that I was not a genius or a prodigy, and would never be either. I learned, after that, to be satisfied with both those facts, and at that point I learned to be satisfied with the one thing no one else but I could do - and that's being myself, and not comparing myself in that ugly manner of only against the measure of others.

Every time I hear or use the expression "nudist colony" I keep thinking of things like ant farms, or those seahorses you can grow yourself - like a Chia nudist - you just pour out the seeds, add water, and presto! Instant naked people! It's a product whose time has come.

I didn't forget; I just failed to remember.

If you're going to do something, do it right the first time. If you're going to do something badly, do it badly enough that the badness becomes art.

Icky: sugar in tea, diet pop, dogs that lick your face, wet slimy things in the sink when you do the dishes

I live alone, and am not one to leave the drawers in my dresser open after removing an item from it. So, when I come home and not only find that the drawer is open, but also find that my rubber-duckie festooned boxer shorts are right on top, I begin to wonder what might be going on around here when I exit my domicile. (Domicile always struck me as a word that only people in correctional facilities would use, or perhaps someone who's been hospitalised for reasons mentally medical in nature.)

"The words of the tongue should have three gatekeepers: Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?" - Arab proverb

I hate socks. Actually, I'm not crazy about anything on my feet when I'm sitting around the house. I have no problem walking across concrete parking lots in my bare feet (this seemed to surprise one of my friends); and I can pick things up with my toes (but lots of people can do that).

I know more compounds and colourful uses of the word "fuck" than you do. To wit: fuckwit, fuckchop, fuckmunch, fuckup, fucker, fuckerdoodle, fucknut, motherfucker, fuck me, get fucked, go fuck yourself

I've always had a problem with critiquing something without sounding like I'm being a critic. There is, of course, a difference between being critical and critique - it's just not a skill of difference I've mastered, but I am getting better.

There may be a lot of positions in the government, but no matter what way you look at it, you're still getting fucked.

There are many definitions for the word try. When someone suggests you try something that can dissociate into a number of life-threatening solvents, they don't necessarily mean that you try it internally.

Burning rituals are common things when it comes to cleansing. Perhaps it's something we can all consider for ourselves. Pick something, something that is important for you to rid yourself of, a problem that needs solving, write it on a bit of paper, and burn the paper. It's important to let things go. Some things, after all, just aren't worth holding on to.

I hate chain letters. I hate someone telling me that my fate, my future, my fortune, will be determined by making a wish, reading a prayer, and sending the letter onwards to a set number of people within a set number of minutes or days. Why are we so suckered in by this sort of thing?

The shadows are as important as the light.

Pastorised: Ordination

Am I the only person who remembers lyrics to the song o/~ Push, push in the bush o/~? If I'm not, I certainly can't be the only person who wishes they'd forgotten them.

Flatware sets should contain twice as many forks as everything else in the set. The universality of the fork shortage requires it.

I was just thinking back on how much, as kids, my friends and I liked to play school - which is really amusing given how much we hated actually going to the real thing half the time.

Don't strip people of their dignity ever; either your own, or someone else's.

"I really have a secret satisfaction in being considered rather mad." - W. Heath Robinson

Don't come looking for me because you can't find something "better". I am no one's afterthought.

Doesn't this just sum up the search for companionship: "Looking for a custom fit in an off-the-rack world." Hawkeye, M*A*S*H

Calling someone by the wrong name is not the worst faux pas you can commit - but it is when you keep calling your son's fiance by the name of his first wife.

Every person should have at least one vice.

Man got his sense of impropriety with nudity from eating the fruit of the tree of knowledge in the Garden of Eden, or so the story goes if you ascribe to that sort of thing. This God person thought man was beautiful in his naked form. It baffles me still how some consider the naked form so dirty. If this God person thought the naked form was just dandy thanks, and you ascribe to his teachings, then your fear of the flesh is your fault.

I would like to climb a tree again, run through sprinklers, splash in puddles, pile up leaves only to mess them by jumping in and running through them. I would like to be as unbound now, as I was when I was little, before life started making other plans for me.

"I just don't want to come to the end of my life and have to say, 'I want things to be different, but I chickened out when I had the chance.'" - Grace, Something to Talk About

Quite by accident some years back I discovered that if I ate sausage or hot dogs the day of a Formula One race, Michael Schumacher would not finish, or would at least lose. I ate a lot of sausage that year.

I don't hold grudges, I hold discomforts. I don't like the thought of spending years of my life deliberately cultivating and nurturing an unhealthy dislike for another human soul, but there are times that a fracture occurs between two people, one that can never be truly or totally healed. And there you have it - the discomfort zone.

May you always be as vivid as your hallucinations.

I can't brain today - I have the dumb.

I think we're all prone to wanting to be what we aren't, simply because we get so used to being what we are that we lose sight of its value.

"You're rather odd and I'm okay with that." - can't remember

I've heard that durians are so smelly that they are banned from being carried on public transportation in some parts of the world. My wonder has always been, "If something smells that badly, how did people manage to find out it was edible, and more to the point, why did they want to?"

Ability does not equal necessity or right.

Participassion: Because it takes two who are into it in order to truly tango.

[crosbyism]

"but then again this is the guy who’s publically known for loving to eat ass so"

I'm sorry, I thought Nate eating ass was fanon. Are you telling me this is an actual canon fact??

god i love when people don’t realise how much “fanon” around sid and nate is actually canon. it’s like heroin to me. also bc it’s like. 90% of the stuff in fics (which is probably why people assume it’s fanon but. oh boy it’s not. there’s shockingly little fanon around these two, mostly because canon is so abundant).

yes, nathan mackinnon is a known ass-eater. let me direct you to this post, anon. you’re welcome.

other nate (and sid) facts you might not have realised are canon:

nate is a known advocate for therapy. he’s been seeing a sports therapist since 2017

they wear matching clothing all the fucking time, sid has said publicly that he started wearing white sneakers and updated his wardrobe due to nate’s influence (iirc nate might’ve even bought him his first pair of white sneakers? either that or it was a “he told me i need to so i did” situation). they share a tailor. unfortunately i now have to bring your attention to the fact that since they have an alarming amount of matching clothes that they’ve bought for each other, that means that they in fact have to know each other’s clothing sizes off by heart. they also low-key share clothing btw

their families celebrate canada day together and their dads are best friends. in-law behaviour goes crazy

nate did in fact stalk his way into sid’s heart (got the same personal trainer and agent at age 13; built his house next door in 2017; they’ve been spending every day in the summers together since at least 2015. sid cooks for them daily, or at least did pre-pandemic. sid refuses to use nate’s gym tho so they always use sid’s).

nate used to have a fan twitter account more or less where he rooted for the pens. it was active until 2017.

sid and nate regularly go to summer weddings together as each other’s dates. they have done this since, once again, at least 2015

nate has confirmed that he used to have a poster of sid on his wall as a teenager (he didn’t confirm he used to jerk off to it but frankly. i think that’d be saying the quiet part out loud)

when sid won the cup in 2009 and held the parade in cole harbour, nate stood by the side of the road watching it. he was about to turn 14, he was already working with sid’s trainer and agent, and he was about to start attending shattuck (sid’s junior high). due to old pics we also know that this was RIGHT before nate had his first growth spurt and hit puberty. i’m not saying seeing sid with the cup kickstarted nate’s puberty and gave him his first boner but i’m not NOT saying it

nate dated vanessa morgan of riverdale fame in his rookie year. she’s now good friends with elias petersson from the vancouver canucks (this means nothing but i do think it’s a very funny coincidence).

nate schmidt, formerly of the VGK, once failed a drug test (it turned out to be a testing-fuck-up); when nhl players were asked about it natemack iconically said “i don’t think he was sticking a needle up his ass” (i just like this one)

when he was a kid, the one other thing sid wanted to be was a hairdresser. nate, on the other hand, “didn’t have a plan B”

nate is canonically possessive of sid (see: the asg 2024) and sid is canonically delighted by this and into it

they go on so many lunch dates in the summer my dude. they go grocery shopping together. like there’s so many pics of them in grocery stores or out having coffee or weird green shakes

oh i almost forgot, they went on a roadtrip through ireland last year. they’ve been on holiday together multiple times over the years though. done some eurotripping together and stuff. in 2015 they spent three months together, three weeks of which were spent living in sid’s santa monica condo together just the two of them

sid has put up a picture of every stanley cup winning captain in his basement since 2008, when the pens lost in the scf to DET. apparently this serves as motivation for him to win the cup. he notoriously does not watch the playoffs after the pens are out

however, he partied so hard at nate’s cup party he actually closed down the party with his dad. nate is the only non-teammate sid’s ever been seen supporting for a cup run (he’s also never been to his teammates’ cup parties afaik so. there’s that)

also they talked on the phone daily and between periods during nate’s cup run. they also canonically have almost weekly phone dates that can run multiple hours. quote nate “i can’t talk to anyone else the way i can talk to him”

they each have pictures of the two of them together framed in each other’s houses

there’s rumours they’re building adjoining houses on neighbouring properties in cape breton next to a golf course bc apparently being neighbours in halifax isn’t enough or something. this one is as yet unconfirmed by reputable sources though

[krindor]

Jewish Life Pre-Diaspora: Women's Hair

back in april @mylight-png made a post expressing a desire to learn about small details of "ancient Judean" life such as clothes, jewelry, hair, etc. and I've found the idea of addressing what I, as a Jewish archaeologist, could in that post intriguing. these types of questions are some of the most interesting, but also the most challenging, for archaeology.

Defining "ancient Judeans"

In this, I'm looking for ancient Judeans as defined by Light's quote "I wish to know what traditional, pre-occupation, pre-exile Jewish life was like." which I'm taking as before the babylonian diaspora in 586 BCE, because anything after that date is post-diaspora, and while there were occupations before 586 BCE, I want to be able to give some answers.

Women's Hair

The only definitive visual depiction of Judean women I could find came from the Lachish Relief, a wall decoration in Sennacherib's Southwest Palace in Nineveh, which is in modern-day Iraq. It depicts the outcome of the siege of Lachish in 701 BCE, where the Assyrians sacked the Judean city as a part of Sennacherib's campaigns into Israel and Judah (the same campaign that led to the diaspora of the 'ten lost tribes')

In the relief, women are displayed as wearing long headscarves (below) so unfortunately this tells us little about their hair (in the relief, children are shown as miniaturized adults, so we also learn nothing about girls hair from the relief).

(Image credit: Amanda Borschel-Dan/Times of Israel)

Hope for learning anything about women's hair isn't lost though, thanks to a type of artifact called a Judean Pillar Figurine (or JPF's for short). These figurines are split into two groups: those using well detailed molds, and handmade, more abstract pieces.

(Deutsch, 2022)

Hundreds of JPF's have been found, with over 50% of them coming from the Jerusalem area and all dating to the 9th-6th centuries BCE, which is the time period we're looking for. The primary issue is that we don't know what exactly they were used for, or who they represent. They could be depictions of Judean women, but it's also likely that they are depictions of Ashera, a local fertility deity that was worshiped alongside El/Hashem in domestic settings (religion in pre-diaspora Israel and Judah is messy, I should probably do one of these about it), and it's even been theorized that they are children's toys. The two types may even be used differently, we just don't know. So while I'm going to show the JPF hairstyles, keep in mind that these may not be the actual hairstyles Judean women wore.

The mold-made faces consistently have "voluminous cheek- or chin-length hair framing a face with full cheeks, a mouth that may smile slightly, a chin, nose, and almond-shaped eyes." (Ben-Shlomo and McCormick 2021, 27, image below from the same, 29).

This hairstyle is seen in the area as early as the 12th century BCE, on an ivory flask "bottle figure" from Lachish, which is pre-Israelite, so this hairstyle has been in the region for a while. (Niditch 2008, 44), and may resemble an Egyptian wig in its form, owing to Egypt's cultural influence over Canaanite and early Israelite culture (Deutsch 2022).

This consistency and longevity in the features is also used as an argument that they represent a single individual (again, Ashera), rather than this hairstyle being ubiquitous among Judean women.

Among the handmade, pinched face JPF's, there is naturally more variety, and a possible hairstyle can be seen in them from Tell en-Nasbeh. Some of these handmade JPF's have a headband that has two side locks coming from underneath it (below), and while none displayed side locks without a headband, the reverse isn't true, though exceptionally rare (2 of the 37 JPF's found had a headband without hair).

(Ben-Shlomo and McCormick 2021, 29)

Conclusion

Due to the undetermined nature of the JPFs, and the lack of other evidence at the moment, it's impossible to definitively say "this is how ancient Judean women styled their hair." That being said, I hope I've presented some current ideas from my field that are interesting, and shed a little light on such an ephemeral topic.

TLDR: I couldn't find much, but there is ongoing research into this topic in archaeology.

[latentspaceofficial]

research tangent! scp x wh13

so this is something a little bit different than what i normally talk about. i'm putting on a different cap today. ok little nerd moment thats been living rent free in my head for days. ive got an antistatic bag on my desk thats been sitting here for a while and i noticed something familiar

that sure as hell looks like the scp foundation logo

which got me really thinking. so its very obvious to me that the scp logo takes inspiration from this iso or ansi symbol. but whats even more odd was looking at the timeline of the scp wikis birth. im a zillenial (god i hate that word) so my childhood was watching markiplier play scp:cb, scrolling the old wiki, fucking with cleverbot. fun stuff like that. i was still a drooling idiot. when sci-fi renamed to syfy. but i remember the switchover and not being allowed to watch eureka because there were some "goddamns" in there. but i was allowed to watch warehouse 13, in spite of steve's existence. i was way too into the steampunk and lore of warehouse 13 when it was relevant. so much so i had a fucking farnsworth ringtone on my lg shit phone and i thought it was the coolest thing. i'm also still gay as hell for h.g. wells and her fit.

but anyway anyway. the premise of warehouse 13 was finding dangerous "artifacts" that imbued special status affects on people and to neutralize them with "neutralizer grid polyethylene static bags" as they say. their motto being "snag it. bag it. and tag it." or something to that effect.

what im getting at is that warehouse 13 has a similar premise to the scp foundation, but more mainstream comedy and less psychological horror. there's a tangential link between wh13 with scp via anti static bags and the symbol. so i looked into this a bit. through cursory searches, i didn't find anyone really talking about this other than a similar premise. so i looked at timelines. in july 2008 the scp foundation wiki (idk which one) was started, while wh13 piloted on july 2009. with a year delta, it seems clear "who stole from who". but wait. writing, pitching, and filming takes quite a while. is a year really enough time? i can't find any trademarks registered by universal nor any evidence of a canadian filming license. so this is where i stopped typing on my phone and started researching. the waters are a bit muddy, so bear with me. wh13 was co-written by a handful of people and rewritten as well. but the original plot was announced by sci-fi here in october of 2007

according to wikipedia (the free encyclopedia), inspirations for warehouse 13 include the x-files, raiders of the lost ark, something called moonlighting, and this show from the late 80s and early 90s called "friday the 13th: the series". i'd never heard of it, but it shares the vaguest premise with both wh13 and scp to keep bad artifacts away from harming people.

well what about the scp wiki? when did it form? well it's complicated. (i'm sorry for my poor cropping, it will happen again)

the scp wiki itself states that the original scp came from 4chan and that a lot of original organization happened on 4chan. indeed 4chan is the source of famous scps such as 173

posted on june 2007 is the original lore post about 173 and can be seen as the beginning of scps. which pre-dates the announcement of wh13. i don't know about you, but how fast you could go from trolling 4chan to a pilot script? at this point "some government authority retrieving dangerous magic embued items" was not a previously done idea and was indeed original. the x-files kinda did this before with balancing larger plot arcs with mini plot supernatural occurrences, not all aliens. but nothing about being an authoritative group that comes in and cleans up super natural mishaps. nah, mulder and skully just stayed in the basement or took an occasional road trip to see a whistleblower. i honestly love scp far more than wh13, but i'm going to be the devil's advocate and not give the new era spin on an old idea to the scp wiki just yet. 173 is an scp, but the idea of scps is not fully laid out yet. the thread was also deleted days later and thus only lived in the minds of active forum users of the time as fan derivatives were made. so there was a period of time where the fandom had started to form, but no official wiki existed. the semi official scp wiki formed in january 2008. later than the announcement of wh13 but before the pilot of the show ever aired in july 2009. so it's always possible the writers were 4channers and yoinked the idea. again, it's so fascinating how close in time and narrative the scp wiki and wh13 are. i personally doubt the writers were on 4chan at the time, but neither the wiki nor the show writers exist in a vacuum. i think it all warrants scrutiny and there's no smoking gun saying who inspired who, or if it's absolute coincidence. that is unless some ogs from the scp wiki or the writers of wh13 are able to speak on it. i'm curious what other people think.

[offender42085]

Post 989

Nicholas M Golden, New Jersey inmate 101979E, born 1990, incarceration intake in 2011 at age 20, released 2018

Manslaughter, Manufacture/Distribution/Dispense of a Controlled Substance

In February 2011, Nicholas Golden, 20, sentenced to nine years for driving under influence, killing Middle Township motorcyclist Craig Lozier, also aged 20.

The incident dates from a July 2008 accident. Nicholas Golden, 18 at the time, of Philadelphia, was traveling southbound on Route 47 when he attempted to pass other vehicles, lost control and struck a motorcyclist traveling northbound, police said. The cyclist, Craig Lozier, 20, of Cape May Court House, was pronounced dead at the scene.

Several pre-trial actions delayed the trial. Golden attempted to have the indictment thrown out but was not successful.

Convicted at jury trial, Golden's lawyer asked the court for a lesser term of 2 years. He argued that his client is earnest and a promising young man who has the potential to be a contributing citizen to the larger society.

The Judge's sentence of 9 years surprised Golden and he was openly shocked. After the sentenced was announced, clenching his rosary beads, the well dressed Nicholas Golden was taken into custody and led out of the courtroom past a photo of Craig Lozier, the man he had killed.

3l

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I have more to say about this link:

It follows on from this post, which I'll just link instead of reblogging to avoid putting that long thing all over people's feeds again. I'm half asleep after work but have to add a few things.

Firstly, there is one entry in that spreadsheet that's new to my collection. Yesterday, I'd set up the whole spreadsheet and was nearly ready to share it, when it occurred to me that, for all the hours and hours I've spent Googling various terms to try to get information on the elusive Chocolate Milk Gang, I'd not tried using the fact that someone people seem to refer to it as being named after milkshakes, not after chocolate milk. So out of curiosity, I Googled a few CMG members' names with the word "milkshake" instead of the words "chocolate milk". I tried a few names, but I knew the most likely name to bring up a result would be David O'Doherty, because as I already knew but that spreadsheet really proves, DO'D is the person who's by far most likely to talk about the existence of the CMG.

What I got is something I'm not sure I sufficiently appreciated last night, as I was tired from dealing with spreadsheet admin for way too long (seriously... the combined time I spent just on trying to write the spreadsheet into HTML format, and then figuring out the best way to upload/share an HTML file... way too many hours), so was focused on just adding that article into the spreadsheet at the last minute, and didn't think too hard about its significance. But looking at it again, this is fucking cool:

This article is from September 2006, just after the Edinburgh Festival. I'm pretty sure it's the earliest example I've ever found of someone referring directly to the Chocolate Milk Gang. The vast majority of that spreadsheet are explanations in the past tense - people saying they "used to be" in that gang. This one, and the Russell Howard article by Jay Richardson, I think are the only two sources that describe it in the present tense, saying these people are in that gang. And the Jay Richardson article is from 2007, so this pre-dates it.

The entire article is interesting, if you happen to be interested in the history of Edinburgh Festival comedy from the 00s, so therefore is extremely interesting to me and otherwise interesting to very few other people in 2024. But if you've enjoyed following along my obsession with that era, I recommend clicking the above link and reading through that whole article. It's an interview with David O'Doherty, based around the fact that he'd been nominated for the Perrier Award in Edinburgh that year, and had lost it to Phil Nichol. DO'D talks a bunch in that article about how awards like this are pointless and being nominated was kind of silly and he's not interested in winning it - it's relevant to context to know he would go on to win that award two years later, in 2008.

...The article does have a weird moment where they describe Jimmy Carr and Russell Brand as friends of David O'Doherty's. It's worth noting that, while a surprising number of cool comedians were apparently hanging out with Jimmy Carr sometimes around 2005, I have listened to a lot of hours of David O'Doherty in various formats talking about his comedy friends/influences/colleagues, and have never heard him describe himself as friends with Russell Brand. Or with Jimmy Carr, for that matter. I'm pretty sure he just mentioned to an interviewer that he'd gigged with those guys before, and because they'd both recently got very famous as of September 2006 (Jimmy Carr had just started hosting everything on TV, Brand was becoming a movie star), they decided to make their article more interesting by mentioning that DO'D worked with them. I'm just clarifying this to defend David O'Doherty's honour, while I'm directing people in 2024 to read an article that claims he hung out with Russell Brand - I'm pretty sure that isn't true, they were just both comedians in 2006.

Anyway, that article has some interesting comments from David O'Doherty on the nature of comedy and industry and awards and competitions, as well as summaries of his career up to that point. But obviously, the passage that was relevant enough to make it into my spreadsheet was this:

HIS MAIN EXTRA-CURRICULAR show was a series of midnight gigs as part of the newly formed , deliberately pompously titled Honourable Men Of Art troupe, in which he is joined by others who take a more considered approach to comedy, such as Daniel Kitson and Demetri Martin. The latter is probably, pound for pound, the best one-liner writer working in comedy today. "A lot of the late-night shows at the festival are just an opportunity for audiences to shout at the comics, so we wanted to try something different," says O'Doherty. "First of all, everyone was seated - we could have got more people in by using the standing space but we didn't. None of us are the hard-drinking, druggy type - in fact we're actually known as the 'Chocolate Milk Kids' because of our fondness for milk shakes." He has good reason to believe that comedy is now moving into an area away from the ubiquitous lads' material. "It's like the move music made from early rock 'n' roll to the more interesting, offbeat, psychedelic stuff in the late 1960s."

Right. Okay. What is this, David? Who the fuck are the Chocolate Milk Kids? I'd never heard that one before. Chocolate Milk Gang, Chocolate Milk Brigade, Milkshake Brigade. But Chocolate Milk Kids? Well that's just making a mockery of it.

...I have some shorter work days coming up this weekend, which I intend to use for further Googling of this chocolate milk/milkshake situation. I think I had it wrong in my previous post on this. My previous post said British people would use both the words "chocolate milk" and "chocolate milkshake" to refer a chocolate milkshake. And they wouldn't use any term to refer to chocolate milk, because it's not common enough there.

A chocolate milkshake - just so we're all on the same page - being something like this:

But after reading my post from yesterday, the British person who originally told me that clarified that that's not what he meant. He said that actually British people would use the term "chocolate milkshake" to refer to both the above drink - which is a milkshake - and to what I would call chocolate milk, which is this:

And they wouldn't refer to anything with the term "chocolate milk". And this may have been the case even more twenty years ago than it is today.

This explanation does less to clarify why they'd get named "Chocolate Milk Gang" for drinking milkshakes - because apparently British people definitely call milkshakes "milkshakes", in addition to calling chocolate milk "milkshakes". Waters are further muddied by the fact that sometimes they do refer to the gang by milkshake-based names, ie. Russell Howard calling it The Milkshake Brigade, and DO'D going with Milkshake Kids in that one article.

My British friend, who has explained to me this quirk of British language, pointed out that one explanation that would make sense is if, when they went to the diner Favorit, they were actually drinking what I, as a Canadian, would call chocolate milk. So the Canadian comedian Glenn Wool called them the Chocolate Milk Gang. And the British and Irish people in the gang described themselves as drinking chocolate milkshakes, but also used Glenn Wool's Canadian term for the actual name of their gang.

That would make sense, if it weren't for the fact that they're not nine years old. No one goes out to drink chocolate milk in the middle of the night. Milkshakes make sense, as a late-night alternative to alcohol for people who want to have a "night out" and drink something fancy but don't want to get drunk. Chocolate milk is just milk. It's a drink for children, and for sensible adults at sensible times of day, not for after late-night comedy shows.

It's also been pointed out to me that Glenn Wool is on social media, so technically, if I wanted to, I could just ask him. Which sounded like a less terrifying idea to me than the idea of contacting any other comedian, and it took me a moment to work out why it seemed that way. I'm pretty sure it's just because he's Canadian. Canadian comedians aren't impressive celebrities, Canadian comedians are people who do drugs with my brother (for the record, Glenn Wool has never done drugs with my brother, and I'm pretty sure has never met him, though as I write this as I realize it's possible he might have and I should find that out because that'd be a useful connection).

"Hey, sorry to message you out of the blue as a stranger, but quick question - did you, by any chance, call the most famous political satirist in the world a nerd in 2002? And if so, what terminology did you use?"

...I'm still half asleep. I need to go to bed.

[lovesongbracket]

Reminder: Vote based on the song, not the artist or specific recording! The tracks referenced are the original artist, aside from a few rare cases where a cover is the most widely known.

Lyrics, videos, info, and notable covers under the cut. (Spotify playlist available in pinned post)

I See the Light

Written By: Glenn Slater & Alan Menken

Artist: Mandy Moore & Zachary Levi for Tangled

Released: 2010

“I See the Light” is a romantic duet in Tangled between Rapunzel and Eugene. It is sung when Rapunzel is finally achieving her lifelong dream to see the floating lanterns. The song was nominated for best song at the 83rd academy awards but lost to “We Belong Together” from Toy Story 3. “I See The Light” was originally called “You Are My Forever,” and was a reprise of a song Mother Gothel sung to Rapunzel, before being removed. After “You Are My Forever” was removed, the song was still different from what it was in the finished film. It was an anthem-like song at first but Alan Menken decided it should be more gentle.

[RAPUNZEL] All those days watching from the windows All those years outside looking in All that time never even knowing Just how blind I've been Now I'm here blinking in the starlight Now I'm here suddenly I see Standing here it's all so clear I'm where I'm meant to be And at last I see the light And it's like the fog has lifted And at last I see the light And it's like the sky is new And it's warm and real and bright And the world has somehow shifted All at once everything looks different Now that I see you [FLYNN] All those days chasing down a daydream All those years living in a blur All that time never truly seeing Things, the way they were Now she's here shining in the starlight Now she's here suddenly I know If she's here it's crystal clear I'm where I'm meant to go [FLYNN & RAPUNZEL] And at last I see the light [FLYNN] And it's like the fog has lifted [FLYNN & RAPUNZEL] And at last I see the light [RAPUNZEL] And it's like the sky is new [FLYNN & RAPUNZEL] And it's warm and real and bright And the world has somehow shifted All at once everything is different Now that I see you Now that I see you

Love Story

Written By: Taylor Swift

Artist: Taylor Swift

Released: 2008 (re-recorded 2021)

Alternate version included: 1989 World Tour pop version, 2015

Taylor was inspired to write “Love Story” when she was going through a difficult situation with a boy she liked, whom she wasn’t “officially” dating. She chose to portray the story of Romeo and Juliet in the song, because she felt like she could relate. The lyrics talk about disapproval against the relationship, and her desire to go somewhere far away with him, and escape the people who look down on them. “Love Story” peaked at #1 on Billboard’s Hot Country Songs, and at #5 on the Billboard Hot 100, just weeks after its release. The song’s music video was described as timeless, by Swift. The video won the CMT Music Awards for “Video of the Year,” as well as “Female Video of the Year.” In February 2021, “Love Story” became the first official re-release from Taylor’s back catalog following contractual disputes with Scooter Braun. It marked the beginning of a new chapter in her career as she sought autonomy and freedom from what she perceived as a manipulative business relationship.

[Verse 1] We were both young when I first saw you I close my eyes and the flashback starts I'm standing there On a balcony in summer air See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns See you make your way through the crowd And say, "Hello" Little did I know [Pre-Chorus] That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet" And I was crying on the staircase Begging you, "Please don't go," and I said [Chorus] Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone I'll be waiting, all there's left to do is run You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess It's a love story, baby, just say, "Yes" [Verse 2] So I sneak out to the garden to see you We keep quiet 'cause we're dead if they knew So close your eyes Escape this town for a little while, oh, oh [Pre-Chorus] 'Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet" But you were everything to me I was begging you, "Please don't go," and I said [Chorus] Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone I'll be waiting, all there's left to do is run You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess It's a love story, baby, just say, "Yes" Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel This love is difficult, but it's real Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess It's a love story, baby, just say, "Yes" [Post-Chorus] Oh, oh [Bridge] And I got tired of waiting Wondering if you were ever coming around My faith in you was fading When I met you on the outskirts of town [Chorus] And I said, "Romeo, save me, I've been feeling so alone I keep waiting for you, but you never come Is this in my head? I don't know what to think" He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring, and said "Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone I love you and that's all I really know I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress It's a love story, baby, just say, 'Yes'" [Outro] Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh 'Cause we were both young when I first saw you

[mostlysignssomeportents]

This day in history

I'm in Minneapolis! Today (Oct 15): Presenting The Internet Con at Moon Palace Books. Monday (Oct 16): Keynoting the 26th ACM Conference On Computer-Supported Cooperative Work and Social Computing.

#20yrsago Identity thief steals sex-offender’s name https://web.archive.org/web/20031002192428/http://www.sexcriminals.com/news/15382/

#15yrsago Librivox free audiobook library now has 365 days’ worth of continuous listening material https://librivox.org/2008/10/15/365-days-of-librivox-audio/

#15yrsago Canada elects 34 copyfighters to Parliament https://web.archive.org/web/20081018165923/https://www.michaelgeist.ca/content/view/3450/125/

#15yrsago BART directors to management: stop using terrorism “fearmongering” https://www.sfgate.com/bayarea/article/bart-debates-allowing-drinks-on-trains-3266010.php

#15yrsago Wedding Ring Cipher contest winners https://memex.craphound.com/2008/10/15/wedding-ring-cipher-contest-winners/

#10yrsago South London school bans “slang” https://memex.craphound.com/2013/10/15/south-london-school-bans-slang/

#10yrsago Why email services should be court-order resistant https://freedom-to-tinker.com/2013/10/15/a-court-order-is-an-insider-attack/

#10yrsago EFF to Comic-Con: protect our secret identities! https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2013/10/open-letter-comic-con-organizers-protect-our-secret-identities

#10yrsago Homlessness and technological literacy: the Tenderloin Technology Lab https://www.wired.com/2013/10/homeless-but-wired/

#5yrsago Epson is teaching the internet not to install security updates https://www.vice.com/en/article/pa98ab/printer-makers-are-crippling-cheap-ink-cartridges-via-bogus-security-updates

#5yrsago Printer refuses humor magazine because “Christian owners” want to protect “the kids” https://www.patreon.com/posts/good-evening-21990238

#5yrsago Parkland kids’ Rube Goldberg machine illustrates the aftermath of school shootings https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mue3N5a9NQE

#5yrsago A sensible, free guide to negotiating book contracts https://www.authorsalliance.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/20181003_AuthorsAllianceGuidePublicationContracts.pdf

#5yrsago Wannacry ransomware cost the British National Health Service £92m ($121m) https://web.archive.org/web/20181015161904/https://www.theinquirer.net/inquirer/news/3064515/wannacry-attack-cost-cash-strapped-nhs-an-estimated-gbp92m

#5yrsago What would a “counterculture of AI” look like? https://www.opendemocracy.net/en/rethinking-ai-through-politics-of-1968/

#5yrsago Bruce Sterling on the next 50 years of climate-wracked maker architecture https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-p4DV80xrm8

#5yrsago China’s panicked upper middle class are easy picking for offshore real estate scams https://www.scmp.com/economy/china-economy/article/2167731/desperate-chinese-middle-class-take-big-risks-move-money-and-themselves

#5yrsago Blame billionaires for climate change https://www.gq.com/story/billionaires-climate-change

#5yrsago Georgia Senator, asked about voter suppression, mugs constituent for his phone https://www.cnn.com/videos/politics/2018/10/14/david-perdue-snatch-phone-voter-suppression-sot-nr-vpx.cnn

#5yrsago A dating website for Trump supporters leaked its customers’ data ON DAY ONE https://techcrunch.com/2018/10/15/donald-daters-a-dating-app-for-trump-supporters-leaked-its-users-data/

#1yrago How lawyers became sadists https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/15/lex-sadist/#incentives-matter

My next novel is The Lost Cause, a hopeful novel of the climate emergency. Amazon won't sell the audiobook, so I made my own and I'm pre-selling it on Kickstarter!

[thebookwassomuchbetter]

Chain of Thorns Epilogue Theories

Because it's been almost ten years since Clockwork Princess and I am READY to get slapped in the face they way I haven't quite been by any words since Blackfriars Bridge, 2008.

So. Which date and location do I think will do the job? Here are my top five picks for the setting of the Chain of Thorns epilogue:

--Cirenworth Hall, 2013/4.

Tessa and Jem are the people still alive who were closest to the TLH gang. They presumably know the full story--them thinking and talking about what happened to our Edwardian faves as they grew up and grew old makes sense. We know CC loves to set up the next series at the end of the previous one, and what better way to transition into the final stage of TSC universe than to have Jessa telling Kit all about James and Lucie and their friends and partners? And what better place for Mina to make her main-novel debut than the finale of her siblings' trilogy (and the last book we will see her namesake alive in)? I think this is the most likely, but I could be biased by my desire for Kit Content.

--Brooklyn, 2013/4

Speaking of setting up the next book and people who were close to the TLH gang... you forgot about Magnus, didn't you? I think this one is less likely than Cirenworth, but a possibility. Magnus almost certainly knows what happened to everyone post TLH and The Black Volume of the Dead is still to come.... plus, TEC and TLH are both very much about being related to Princes of Hell. The Princes of Hell might appear in TWP so that connection is also a point to Cirenworth, but you never know.

--London, 1988

Ok. This one is pure wishful thinking but here me out: Stephen Herondale, young, rebellious, arguing with his parents about the circle. It's not that unlikely that his father, Marcus--James and Cordelia's grandson according to the family tree--would tell him about James. This one would put the bitter in bittersweet ending, because we know what happens next, but honestly? Would be here for it.

--Paris, 2013

We know COT is going to start in Paris, so why not end there too? It's been important throughout TLH, as have the Blackthorn and Carstairs families... And Emma and Julian are there post TDA pre-SoBH, 'liking it so much they keep extending their stay'. They might be able to tell us at least some of the story, and there's a nice Cortana connection (potentially a Ghostwriter connection too, if Julian is descended from them). Tessa and Magnus were there after Will died, and TEC opens there too... Both Jace and Kit's parents are there in The Wicked Ones, if you want more Herondale Memories.

--The Shadowhunter Academy, 2014

I thought of this idea last but I actually like it and I think SoBH's ending makes it fairly likely. Checking in with Dru (maybe finally meeting Thais instead of just getting word-of-God details about her from Cassie's social media?!) and finding out a bit more about what happened to Jaime would make a lot of sense from a 'setting up TWP' perspective--Cassie might want everyone who didn't read SoBH to know Jaime went missing in Faerie. I'm going with The Shadowhunter Academy as opposed to the Scholomance because we've already seen Ty there in the Lost World--we haven't seen Dru at the Academy outside of SoBH. I also think it would be a nice throwback all the way to Nothing But Shadows, which is the start of the Merry Thieves. It'd be nice to see how the Academy has changed since James's day.

Well, I would love to know what everyone thinks the epilogue might be. Watch there not be a modern epilogue at all 🤡. Wish me luck not flipping to the back of my copy before I've finished the book!

[behind-the-screen-of-bangtan]

The Astronaut

Release date: 28 October 2022

Official page

Announcement

Pre-order info

Logo trailer

Promotion schedule

Poster

Messages between Chris Martin and Jin

Stories on BTS’ Instagram

Lyrics

Doolset’s translation

Colin’s notes and translation

Concept photo (see below)

MV (see below)

Naver post with pictures taken during promotion

Jin’s Instagram posts: Coldplay concert, Photo and MV (#1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, #8, #9), Weverse live, Concept Photo, MV

Weverse live:The Astronaut 발매 기념 🌌,The Astronaut 발매 기념 🌌 다시 (Today’s Bangtan)

Wootteoview: Wootteo’s observation log of Jin ‘The Astronaut’

Jin's Special Challenge for ARMY: teaser, video

Thanks to

J-hope’s tweet for Jin’s birthday

Thanks to

After j-hope, Jin is the next member to release a solo work in Chapter 2. The song “The Astronaut” is co-produced by Coldplay, with whom BTS collaborated on “My Universe”. Jin explained in his Weverse live that the song was made during the summer and recorded in September. He’s the one who wrote the Korean lyrics, with the second verse being changed from English to Korean at the last minute.

For the occasion, a mascot, named Wootteo (meaning space wanderer), has been created and got its own Instagram account (English translation of the posts). Wootteo was originally called Woodol but for copyright reasons, it had do be changed.

Concerning the logo trailer, the NASA voyager space probes can be seen (src).

Concept photo

Outlander, Lunar Eclipse, Land on Earth

Concept Photo Sketch

Episode of the Jacket Shoot Sketch

B-sides: Melon, Genie

Outfits and accessories

Fans noticed an easter egg in the concept photo Outlander. The blue planet in front of which Jin stands could be Aurora, the lost planet in Coldplay’s Music of the spheres (cr.).

MV

Teaser

Coldplay’s teaser

Lyric video

Episode of the MV Shoot Sketch

MV Photo Sketch

Naver post

Outfit: first suit identified by Bangtan Style, Thom Browne’s tweet, casual outfit identified by BangtanStyling

Exterior scenes were filmed in Disney’ golden oak ranch (see this thread for src and pictures). The scenes inside the bedroom were shot in a studio in Korea.

There are two cameos from the staff. At 1:58, the blonde woman in the background is one of Big Hit’s stylist director, GANi. And the person in the astronaut suit is Nam Hyunwoo, the director of photography of pretty much every BTS MVs (src #1, src #2).

Several easter eggs ornate Jin’s room:

the poster announcing the collaboration between Coldplay and BTS on “My Universe”

a picture of Coldplay

a vintage celestial planisphere

a vintage solar system poster

another solar system poster, possibly custom made after a stock picture by Roomyana

First American Spacewalk

Apollo 17 Extravehicular Activity

astronaut

planets

planets beyond our solar system

a photograph of Buzz Aldrin on the moon during the Apollo mission

Super Mario Bros figures (Jin is a fan of Super Mario)

drawings made by Goya, the son of director Lumpens, drew the drawings (see this Instagram post)

MapleStory figures (Jin played the game a lot)

the guitar Chris Martin gifted to Jin (cr.)

an antique poster showing forces in the Solar system

advertisement for Mick Fanning’s softboards

a Coldplay photograph taken by Sarah Lee

Chris Martin makes a cameo in the MV as the anchor. Jin revealed he could’ve also been the astronaut, the person bumping him in the street or the truck driver

the poster for Coldplay’s Music  of spheres concert

3 VHS of respectively Song of the thin man, Another thin man and John Paul Jones

a Coldplay photograph taken by Stephan Crasneanscki, probably a promotional shot for their album Viva La Vida Or Death And All His Friends, taken on May 2 2008

the vinyl of “My Universe”

Footsteps on the moon surface, Earth rises above lunar horizon

Astronaut

ufo alien plate hovering over field

two astronauts space suits standing

the October 2016 issue of Automobile and one of Motor Trend

a 16-bit Mega Drive

The crossword puzzle Jin does also has its nods:

People even noticed that the black squares on the crossword form “For ARMY” (cr. #1, #2) in braille. Jin also has ARMY written in braille on his neck (cr. #1, #2).

Concert

Jin in Argentina

Episode Special Performance Sketch

Jin performed the song during Coldplay’s concert in Argentina on October 28. The group tweeted during rehearsals to announce Jin’s arrival. Rolling Stone released more content from the rehearsal (video, photos). You can find the video of the performance on Youtube and the Today’s Bangtan pictures on Twitter. Chris Martin took the time to introduce the song before they performed it, here’s a video and a transcription.

Press release

Weverse magazine: “The music of “forever boy” Jin”

Promotion video that was broadcast on several news channel like TongTongCulture or Newsen (pictures)

MTV: “Jin's Journey As 'The Astronaut' Has Just Begun”

[quirrelli]

Marvel Rewatch Thread

Originally posted: 25.02.22-14.03.22

Haven't seen most of the Marvel movies since they came out but I have a sudden urge to rewatch them like a TV show, with Endgame as the season finale. And to tweet about it. (Feel free to mute this thread if you're only here for the art.)

Iron Man still fucking rules. It has so much of what I like to call buzz porn. I will never get tired of the suiting up sequences.

Evil Jeff Bridges with a cigar on a Segway. A king.

We've all gotten used to it by now but the way they show Tony's face in the 3D-void with the digital interface over it is actually pretty ingenious.

Speaking of Tony, RDJ may always play himself, but the man oozes charisma from the points of his funky goatee to the bell bottoms of his suit pants.

And Jarvis too! I've never not loved a Paul Bettany performance. I predict I may say this several more times, but the casting carried this franchise from the start.

That final battle is like, what if Transformers but good?

---

Ah, the famously maligned Iron Man 2. It's true, it's not as good as the first but nevertheless, the War Machine suit FUCKS. (And so does the song).

I like Whiplash, it's Hammer that's the problem. Everyone, but especially he talks so much that the quippy bickering that is 90% of the dialogue stops being amusing like it was in 1 and becomes draggy.

Also, the narrative structure is much less clean. Iron Man 1's plot is a tight piece of ass, where 2 needs to do some more squats.

---

The Incredible Hulk certainly is an odd little duckling in the lineup. Its connection to the rest of the MCU is so tenuous as to almost not be felt at all, especially with Norton's recasting. It's also the only one without a post-credits stinger.

I will say I like Norton!Banner, but there is something off about this Hulk's face. Maybe the technology just wasn't quite there yet in 2008.

Certainly appropriately green color palette throughout though. I'm also noticing a certain grimy, tactile nature to these early entries that's gradually lost as more and more of the sets and even costumes get replaced by pure CGI. Some jumpy editing here and there too.

---

Again, the casting in these movies is stellar across the board but man, Chris Evans is such a perfect Captain America in every way. Certainly the best bod in the biz, come at me, rival Chris stans.

That replacement effect they did with pre-serum Steve's body is surprisingly good, especially remembering much more recent travesties like the Super-stache.

The first Cap suit is still lowkey my favorite one. That functional military aesthetic is just my vibe.

---

Thor is better than I remember. Everyone, but especially Jane is super likeable actually. Also, I would trust Heimdall with my life savings, my first born, my soul and my browser history.

Besides Tony, Loki arguably carried this franchise more than any other character and he proves yet again that family makes the best villains.

---

The Avengers takes me back. It might be old news now, but this is the movie that invented the concept of the "cinematic universe". Like, that wasn't a word before. It was thrilling.

I remember when I got into Marvel after the first Iron Man came out, reading rumors about a potential Avengers movie and thinking that it was never going to happen. It would be too big, too expensive, too much to set up, just unfeasable on every level. And then it... happened.

That first arc of the MCU might have also been the best execution of a cinematic universe to date, bc it was at that point still Tony's story at its core and his arc finishes here. But we'll see as we go along.

---

Thor 2 is the first of these that really feels like it only exists to be part of the larger franchise. That is not a good thing. It's what sank the DCU before it even left the shallows.

There's a very noticeable lack of verve compared to the first one, the cinematography and editing is so unexciting, the plot so basic. I mean they whipped out the ol' "when the planets align" chestnut. The only fun idea is the wacky gravity but they don't do enough with it.

Jane, despite being more directly involved in the conflict feels much less like an active agent than the first one and what did they do to rapier-man's hair?

I don't mean to pretend like these movies are high art or anything but this is well below the standards set, like b-tier fantasy at best.

---

I have to admit IM3 is better the second time around. The big twist obviously loses its impact but there's some good moments and it's thematically more coherent than I originally gave it credit for.

Having said that, that theme and its resolution requires that this be the end of Iron Man as a character, which it obviously won't be. It's sort of the opposite problem from the last one: Where Thor2 can't exist outside the MCU, IM3 can't exist within it.

What made me absolutely livid when I first saw this movie is that Tony gets the reactor removed. It still doesn't sit right with me, though the reasons have shifted. Then, it was bc Tony and the suit are a unit, if it's not part of him he becomes exactly what cap says he is in A1

Now, contrary to what IM3 posits, the reactor to me symbolizes accepting the wounds of the past as a permanent part of yourself and growing from them, which breaks down as a metaphor if Tony could always get rid of the shrapnel and just didn't, for some reason.

Also, the mark 42 is still fugly.

---

CA: winter soldier has some really good hand-to-hand combat and I really like the bromance with Natasha. They make a good team. Same goes for Wilson.

Because the themes of mass surveillance and corruption are more relevant than ever I'm not a huge fan of the conspiratorial bent this movie takes. It's a bit too real a subject to go full wacky Hydra long-con, you know.

---

Guardians 1 does a remarkable job being good, considering all the new stuff it has to fit in. I'm not particularly attached to any of the characters but yeah, it works, it's just a solid flick all around.

I'm having flashbacks to baby groot mania

---

Guardians 2's opening slaps. Also, de-aged Kurt Russell looks surprisingly convincing.

It's the sequel that's just better in every way. G1 laid a solid foundation that this one builds on a lot. It really digs into the characters' hearts (and makes me mix my metaphors apparently). They even manage to make the goofy tone thematic in that it's Peter's coping mechanism

Ego is the rare antagonist who isn't a foil but a natural evolution of the protagonist. Definitely in the upper echelons of Marvel villains.

I really like the ship with the little movable laser balls. Creative.

---

Avengers 2 time! Vision: Awesome! Hulkbuster: Awesome! That shot of Cap ripping a log in two: Awesome! Natasha calling herself a monster bc she can't have children... a choice.

I'm glad they acknowledge from the start how OP Wanda is. I'm less glad her powers are basically reduced to telekinesis when they're so much funkier than that.

Why did they give Ultron so much... face? Especially combined with Spader's expressive performance it would have been much more unsettling to have a motionless mask.

This movie really takes IM3 from a mixed bag to utterly pointless.

It could be on my end but the audio mixing is off. Some of the sfx are weirdly quiet in places.

---

Ant-Man is definitely a breath of fresh air after all relentless power escalation of the previous batch of movies. Slows down a little, brings down the scale (hah), you know

Although I do remain a touch salty that they didn't go with original ant-man/yellowjacket, especially since they already transplanted the Ultron storyline to Tony. I would have liked to have seen mad scientist Pym and his merry circus of fucked up alter-egos.

---

Movie civil war is better than comic book civil war bc it ties into the characters way more and bc the inciting incident actually directly involves an avenger, and one who is famously volatile to boot. Still perhaps a touch contrived though.

Black Panther!!! The only hero who may out-cool Tony. RIP, king.

Why are the police in Bucharest speaking German? That really threw me, to the point I was unsure where that part was taking place. Pretty serious oversight honestly.

And why did steve kiss this random side character who doesn't matter? In a movie as long as this you can't really afford to keep dead end plot lines like that around.

My aesthetic is steve rogers' biceps.

---

Listen, Toby Maguire will always have a special place in my heart, but Holland is the best package as far as spider-men go. Even though obviously no-one here looks their age I do buy Holland as conceptual teenager. Like, the energy is correct, in a way it never was before.

I really enjoy dad!Tony's ineptitude too. There was a touch of that IM3 (keep coming back to that one, huh) but it works better here.

Did they cast Michael Keaton as the Vulture bc of Birdman? I'm gonna choose to believe they did.

If I may nitpick for a second here: The new Avengers HQ was introduced after Ultron, two years before Homecoming takes place, so why would they just now have a "moving day"?

---

I really like the tech in Black Panther. The beads, the sand, the cloaks. Really adds to Wakanda's identity separate from the rest of the universe.

Who gave Michael B. Jordan the right to be this attractive and compelling and generally a highlight of the franchise?

WAR RHINOS!!!

---

Do I have lingering trauma from being on tumblr in the years 2012-17? Yes. But I still have to admit Cumberbatch is a decent actor. My favorite thing about his casting is that there's probs no one else whose name is as evenly matched in joke potential to their character as him.

The trippy shit is great. Like Inception on LSD. Just fun to watch even if, like me, you're not super invested in the story.

Rachel McAdams is so pretty <3

---

Thor Ragnarok summary The aesthetic: impeccable The cast: hideously attractive The humor: so good The tonal shift compared to previous entries: lurching

I guess it only makes sense that the most unique, mould-breaking, complete stories have the most trouble fitting into such a behemoth of a franchise. Ragnarok might be the best MCU movie outside of the context of the MCU.

When Thor lands on the rainbow bridge all electrified, a lightning arch connects between his eye and his chest circle thingy and I love that particular frame so much.

---

The size fuckery in Ant-man 2 is even better.

I don't like the ghost's acting. Nothing wrong with the character, but her body language is stiff and awkward. Now scott's daughter, there's a real mvp.

Watching the first after credits stinger before having seen infinity war makes it super ominous actually.

---

Captain Marvel aka I'm gaaaaaay, the movie. And not just me. Carol and Maria will get married eventually and finish raising their daughter together, you cannot convince me otherwise.

Aww, I forgot about the Stanley montage. That's sweet.

I do love the mohawk.

Larson leans into the cocky badass persona a bit too far but what I like about Carol is how much joy she finds in her powers. Like so many heroes they get foisted on her but she doesn't get caught up in any "but what if I'm a monster" or "I didn't ask for this" angst.

She discovers she can fly and is like "fuck yeah I can fly! Watch me gooooo!" You know, the correct response. One of my favorite moments in the movie is when she starfishes straight through a spaceship just for shits and giggles.

---

The remarkable thing about Infinity War is that while not everyone gets an arc, everyoen at least gets a beat or two and it all makes sense and hits. That's the pinnacle of what can be achieved with a well-designed cinematic universe.

The only thing that feels a touch underdeveloped is Wanda and Vision's relationship. It's a shame bc Wandavision is such a good ship with so much history. At least they have a TV show now. Also, I notice Wanda lost her accent.

Do Strange and Tony have... chemistry? Not to get all shippy for the finale but like, I might have to check AO3 and see if there's anything good.

Why is it that all of my faves specifically have to die :(

---

Is Infinity War/Endgame the best two parter finale? A case might be made, I think.

This movie really makes me cognizant of how well structured the power escalation in this franchise is (leaving aside the fact that the sorcers are supremely OP).

Time travel and universe rearrangement is game-breaking and about as far as you can reasonably go in scale. The stakes just lose touch with what's humanly imaginable/ empathizable after that, which is why it's good that they saved it for the very end.

Endgame has a touch of the ol' "too many endings" disease but I'd say it's earned them at this point.

---

Wrap up time! First, the perhaps obvious: there's a difference between watching 22 movies and 22 TV eps. They flow different and the movie marathon does get exhausting in a way the equivalent of ~2 TV seasons wouldn't have done.

They are, for the most part, fun flicks in their own right but I'm left wondering if the individual heroes wouldn't have been better served in a semi-canon CU, where weirder titles like Dr. Strange and Ant-Man would have had more freedom to experiment.

Then again, the existence of the MCU doesn't preclude future iterations that do push the envelope a little more. In fact, Wandavision, the only one of the TV shows I've cared to watch, does go in that direction, to the point that it ends up straining against its MCU obligations.

Anyway, I'm not gonna do a ranking of the movies. Instead I'm gonna do sth much more fun and at least 5% less overdone and rank each movie's main villain! It's possible they might correlate more strongly with overall enjoyment than the heroes even. Let's see here:

1. Loki 2. Killmonger 3. Vulture 4. Hela 5. Ego 6. Winter Soldier 7. Obadiah Stane 8. Ultron 9. Thanos 10. Yon-Rogg 11. Kaecilius 12. Yellowjacket 13. Ghost 14. Red Skull 15. Aldrich Kilian 16. Whiplash 17. Zemo 18. Colonel Ross 19. Ronan the Accuser 20. Malekith

[lonita]

Today's short poem, pre-2008

These are micro-poems I wrote prior to 2008 the composition dates for which are lost.

Heart in the right place Body in the wrong one. - + -

Heaven is the silence after snow When no one ventures forth Past dreaming out the window

- + -

Hills are no longer challenges too steep to climb. They now beckon.

- + -

I am vivid, by degrees By incremental motions

- + -

It's a pasture of glass A room full of sea-green and dark blue night

- + -

Journey. Almost there, and nowhere near it.

- + -

No time like the present; no present like time.

- + -

The wind blows, soft, through open windows.

- + -

Wake me from my night dream To build a better day

- + -

What creates the past Is our memory Hindsight

- + -

Each day brings sorrows And its joys Each day brings knowing And doing

- + -

You want what you cannot get And do not want what you can attain.

[batattta]

destiel fic recs nobody asked for

I’ve read a lot of fanfiction since november and I needed to express it somehow. so. here goes a HUGE rec list. 

no order at all, huh. canonverse, if not said otherwise. bold for my favorites.

part 2 | part 3 | part 4

part 1/?

first and second date (9k and 13k, t/e) very healthy s15 deancas relationship, dean goes to therapy (as he should), must-read

he bids good-bye to distance (3k, e) purgatory smut, you know the drill 

understanding your body in ten easy steps (13k, e) i love this dean so much, a little bit insecure and so vulnerable and caring! such a sweet fic!

the mirror (25k, m) this one actually made me sob; dean travels though alternate realities and meets...a lot of other deans and castiels

where the weeds take root (30k, e) this one is in my top-5, i guess. please, just GO READ. they live in the country, built a chicken coop, smoke weed and figure out their relationship. all of my favorite headcanons in one fic. and with gorgeous illustrations!! 

a turn of the earth (95k, m) heartbreaking, but with a happy ending. timetravel, cas meets pre-series dean. 

an idiot's guide to a successful love confession in two words or less (4k, e) okay. dean confesses to cas using thee mixtape. what more should i say? 

crazy diamonds (25k, e) dean from 2008 swaps places with dean from 2018. so cute, so sweet, but SO SAD. but good sad. not hopeless sad. don’t wanna spoil anything, but i was sitting in silence after finishing this one, like, for half an hour. 

a room of one’s one (95k, e) a classic one. ALL THE KINKS!! just a little bit of angst, but mostly very sweet. wing!kink 

the first five times (43k, e, mcd) oh. this one. endverse. very dark and depressing. but you know, they love each other. so much. and it describes my favorite concert about endverse. i cried like a baby. yeah. this kind of sad. 

you can keep holding on (352k, e) i love this one so, so much. i adore this cas and this dean. they are precious. there is one thing that author preferred not to include in tags (and i get why), but at the time it was. um. hard. still was worth it tho. but be careful. pretty heavy themes in this one. but such a HAPPY ENDING! ah. 

dean (and cas') top 13 zepp traxx (82k, e) post-canon, road trip, led zeppelin, love love love

tall grass (58k, e) cas grows a garden!!!!!! found family on maximum! sex scene like WOAH. hot. last few paragraphs are such a beautiful prose. i keep coming back and rereading them. 

build a home (20k, t) another post-canon found family fic. yeah. i have a soft spot for them.

that’s me in the corner (9k, e) “heaven can't wait” fic. i love all this fanfiction gap stories. this on is so *chefs kiss*. 

welcome to pine shores! (21k, e) and another post-canon story! can’t stop won't stop. they are old and own a motel. and still are dancing around each other. huh. they’re such idiots *fondly*

every story has to start somewhere (27k, e) i must confess. i have a soft spot for dean in denial trope. and this one is all about dean trying not to be gay. spoiler: he fails. lol. 

sunshine (8k, g) usually straight dean is ooc for me, you know. but this one is a good exception. it’s just so sweet and tender and all about their profound bond. yep. 

enough (1k, t) as grey ace person myself, ace cas is so very important for me. 

the mantra (3k, g) PLEASE READ IT. post 12.12. i reread it regularly. so tender. oh my god. i have no words. just. go read.

scratchmarks (12k, e) one of this smut fics, where smut is not about smut at all. this is 2009!dean/cas/2014!dean. sad, but so beautiful.

may i? (12k, e) post s15 purgatory fic. how it should have been. 

profoundly bonded (by law) (20k, e) firstly: sobsicles is currently one of my favorite destiel authors. so. cas asks dean to marry him. dean have no reason to decline. such a sweet domestic fic. dean is so dumb (we all know that).

the sum of my regrets (20k, m) dean goes to the past and meets cas’ female vessel. nothing happens between them back there, if you're worried. but dean does come to the realization.

the girlfriend experience (15k, e). another classic one. no words needed.

twenty dollars (15k, e) cas-centric, post gas-n-sip. he tries to survive and has no other choice but to turn tricks. poor baby. i wanted to hug him so bad while reading this. 

until the lost become the found (35k, e) such a unique story! i’ve never knew that i needed it so much until this fic. dean. cas. and endverse!cas. yep. you got it right. the ending!! the sex scene (omg)!! perfect characterization of endverse!cas. and you know, he deserves a lot of love. all the love. it may be not everyone’s cup of tea, but please, give this fic a chance. 

[ginkgomoon]

Gavin and MC’s High School History- Detailed Timeline

Dedicated to my amazing and kind friend @cheri-cheri- one of the Queens of the MLQC fandom on Tumblr! I literally didn’t know how to use it before but I had learnt how in order to keep up with her posts. Without her work, I literally wouldn’t be on here making my own blog either. Thank you, Cheri!!

This is a timeline following the years of high school that MC and Gavin had together. Compiled of dates, rumours and secrets, calls, texts, and other from multiple servers. The source will be shown allocated to its corresponding sentence. I created this because I was really moved when I rewatched Gavin’s Old Days Date and suddenly thought of the many things other players could have missed out on regarding their high school years. If there is anything you need clarification on, or if you would like to add anything in, feel free to send a post/ask or just comment and I’ll try to incorporate and adjust accordingly! 

Based off of true correspondence of the Chinese education system in Shanghai, where the schools there are very strict, with specific responsibilities and events students must have and attend to. In addition, this is different from Western school systems where years 7-9 are in a seperate schools from years 10-12 before university. Dates and seasons mentioned will also be noted as accurately as possible to suit the Loveland storyline in which different events occurred. I felt like a detective trying to piece a fractured storyline together to solve a mystery, honestly...

Prepare your tissues, your milk tea and your soul because even I almost didn’t make it to publish this...

Timeline

2008

Gavin enters high school.

2009

MC and Minor enter high school. MC does her hair in a nice ponytail, one of the only hairstyles she ever had in school.

Gavin is a grade above her. He is in his last year of high school. [Spring Festival Date]

Late Autumn of October 2010

“I noticed who you were before you ever noticed me.” 

On a rainy first day of school, Gavin helps Mr Keller move the tables and chairs in the classroom. 

Without taking an umbrella, Gavin leaves. 

At the same time, MC saves a cat in the rain with her handkerchief, attempting to shield it from the incoming rain under a roof. She gives it snacks from her bag while sheltering it from the rain. 

Gavin thinks she was nerdy-looking, but couldn't take his eyes off her and watches her from a distance for a long time. He feels out of place standing.

She looks back at him in astonishment, not knowing how long he stood for. 

She smiles at Gavin.

Gavin notes that MC’s smile just like her eyes, were pure and comforting as they start filling his vision. 

The rain starts to get heavier and MC shivers. 

Something stirred in Gavin’s heart as he notices this, and kicks a can in frustration then shelters her with his jacket. 

He runs away as MC shouts, “thank you!” 

She didn’t know it was Gavin who gave her his jacket at the time.

MC goes back and is then told by her fellow classmates that the boy she encountered was the “tyrant school bully”,  and “the Underworld Senior Gavin”, and that she should stay away from him. [Tilted Time- Rumours and Secrets]

-

MC finds piano dull to play the same songs over and over again.

MC in her spare time practices and sings to Liszt’s Liebestraum No. 3 (Love Dream) for a talent show.

At the rooftop, Gavin is wounded by a gangster’s knife. A gradually intensifying melody is heard. 

Gavin kicks the gangster boss but then is pursued again. Outnumbered, wounded and losing consciousness due to major blood loss, the gangster boss kicks Gavin off the roof. 

Gavin reaches out, to something- anything. 

A heavy, surging melody sounded, transcending through time and allows Gavin to reflect on his past- to his father, to his late mother, and invokes deep reflection and epiphanies. 

Heavy notes seep into Gavin’s ears as he almost hits rock bottom. He feels his limbs emerging with the wind and awakens his wind evol. 

Gavin is now reborn.

The music continued to play. Gavin ends up humming with a bird. 

He then hears MC’s singing.

MC stops, mesmerised by the ginkgo leaves flying through the wind. The ginkgo leaves falling was her favourite time of the year in high school. This vivid sight is still engraved in her memory after many years.

Gavin vows to protect her for the rest of his life. [Campus Date]

-

Gavin saved Minor from bullies. 

Minor also happens to be MC’s outgoing, talkative desk mate who sometimes helped old ladies cross the street. How he managed to hang around Gavin and not get beaten up, nobody knew (except us). He would often copy MC’s homework but never dragged her down with him if he got caught. This was MC’s biggest impression of him. 

During science class, MC cooked noodles for Minor on the Bunsen burner when he was hungry. The recipe was Shrimp flavoured instant noodles, mix two eggs in well, then add a dab of sea salt and black pepper. [S1 Chapter 7-1]

-

Gavin is always at the school gates at 7:30am. Carrying his flat school bag, he orders fish balls at the snack kiosk on the north side of the school. It was the third day in a row that Minor notices this. [Minor’s Memory Book]

Gavin would occasionally travel around on his bicycle. (Pre-debut Sparky??) He says he was good at riding it. [Lost Love Date]

It was hard to find Gavin as he’s rarely at school, so she didn’t see him until 3 days later when MC went to the library at sunset. 

She tries to retrieve “Byron’s Poetry Collection” from the top of a 2-metre shelf, and since Gavin was a head taller, he was able to help her get it. 

He musters up the introduction that he recited many times- but MC quickly thanks him and leaves before he could speak.

Minor notices Gavin watching after MC and that he was SMIL-ING. 

He helps him locate MC and reports that every day after school she would go to the library for afternoon revision, always sitting in the same seat. 

Gavin sat at a corner not far, quietly flipping through textbooks he hated. People who were reading in the library would be driven away because they were scared of him LOL

MC would then leave at 5pm sharp to go back home. 

Gavin commits to walking back 10 metres behind her with Minor every day on forward. [CN Tilted Time Rumours and Secrets] 

-

Gavin saves Minor from bullies again. Minor dedicates himself to be his “bro”. 

He finds out that MC is an honours student, but doesn’t know that she’s the school orchestra leader. [Mystery Wings Event] and [Mark Date] However, he does know that she’s renowned as the “campus belle/ school flower”.

Minor idly mentions that more people were giving MC love letters.

Gavin tells Minor to collect all the people who were planning to confess their love to MC. Minor doesn’t want to be wingman anymore HAHA

Gavin stared those boys down as they trembled with fear. He tells them to take them back and if they scare her, he’ll make them regret it. 

Minor realises Gavin’s feelings for MC. [Minor’s Memory Book] 

-

MC eats from a small stall outside the school gate selling red bean puffs. ($3 for one, $5 for two. What a deal!) 

She also encounters the stall that sells sugar figurines [Gift of Life- Sugar Figurine Call]

MC ate chocolate sticks often at school. It's also a memory of student life for Gavin, as well. [CN 2021 March Sign-In Taste of Happiness]

Students would scramble for the small swing set in the school garden. MC never went at lunch breaks, but she watches the sunset on it after school. Gavin is sometimes nearby. MC never noticed him, but she does however notice the ginkgo leaves dancing in the wind. [Mini House Small Happening- Leisure Time]

-

Gavin isn’t his usual self anymore. He sees MC out in the library everyday and starts reading “5 Years of College Examinations and 3 Years of Sample Questions” (book for colleague entrance examinations).

MC watches a basketball match at school. She calls someone from an away team “dashing” because they won with a dunk. This has been engraved in Gavin’s memory ever since. [Dreamers Date]

Gavin found out that he was very fond of basketball success stories, rushing into the court to try hundreds of shots after. He writes “I will beat you” beside Sakuragi Hanamichi from a Slam Dunk poster alongside “not a step back”.

(Slam Dunk starts out with a boy wanting to play basketball to impress his crush.)

Gavin then injures his head badly :(

He realises that basketball couldn’t help him to protect anything he wanted. He determines that he will do whatever it takes (to “beat” himself”). [Mystery Wings Event]

-

Gavin leans against a tree as he watches MC hurry down the corridor as she clutches a textbook. [Boundary Rumours and Secrets]

MC would eat pocky. Gavin would eat them too. [2021 March Sign-In Moments]

- 

MC faints during a sports meet because she didn’t eat breakfast.

Gavin hurries to carry her to the infirmary. [CN Delightful Search Date]

He leaves bread and milk before she wakes up.

-

MC is on duty during PE class, which happens to be on basketball. 

Minor was careless about his aim and the ball almost hit her in the head. Gavin slams the ball away. [Minor’s Memory Book]

Gavin glares at Minor as MC thanks him.

Minor also “accidentally” pushes MC towards him.

Gavin glares again.

Gavin later is continuously shooting hoops. 

MC returns late at night to clean up the gym but all had been returned neatly in the basket. MC wanted to thank him but couldn’t. [CN Basketball Court Date]

-

There was a school sports competition that they attended. Gavin participated in the 10 lap race and came first by an impressive large measure. [Minor’s Memory Book]

MC participates in the sprint race, too. Gavin is worried about her performance, and if she would faint again. 

Gavin requests Minor to take a photo of her on his phone (which probably ended up as the photo that he carried with him in his early days at special training where the other men teased him about hiding a photo of a girl.) 

Approaching the End of October 

Gavin, Minor and MC are walking home. 

The weather is cold, and Gavin notices MC shivering in the distance. Gavin, conflicted by this, tells Minor to buy MC a hot drink without telling her that it was from him. [CN Tilted Time Rumours and Secrets] 

MC would occasionally spot a hot drink or a carton of strawberry milk in the piano room. [Chapter 31-12]

-

Gavin one day is conflicted by their early exchange, recalling how MC looks startled at the entrance of the library after seeing each other. His spirit depletes, kicking himself (metaphorically) in the corner of the classroom at how he might have scared her. 

Minor rushes in with a pink bandaid from MC for the wound at his mouth. 

He carefully took that bandaid, treating it as if it was his world’s most precious treasure.

This pink bandaid was always taped on his heart and whenever he stepped into the swamp-like darkness of the night, it gave off a faint warmth. [Mystery Wings Event]

-

MC starts to notice Gavin everywhere. At the corners of windows, she would see his figure. At the library, he would help her retrieve books from higher places. She would also see books laid out on his table, but most of the time he would be sleeping. Beneath his overlapping arms, he sees “Byron’s Poetry Collection”. Gavin doesn’t understand the poems, though. 

Lord Byron's "Don Juan" - Canto the Ninth, XVI 

"To be, or not to be?" — Ere I decide I should be glad to know that which is being? 'Tis true — we speculate both far and wide, And deem, because we see, we are all-seeing; For my part, I'll enlist on neither side Until I see both sides for once agreeing; For me, I sometimes think that Life is Death,

-

At the music rehearsal room on the fifth floor, she would see a corner of his shirt in the wind. 

MC thinks Gavin is friendly and slowly lets down her guard. 

At the canteen, he would offer her the last bottle of water. 

She begins smiling at him when they see each other, with the small arcs forming on her lips, soon becoming smiles that made her eyes squint.

-

MC would walk along the Senior hallways and subconsciously stop at a certain classroom- catching the sight of Gavin sleeping. On one particular day, she sees him standing by the window, staring at the sky. 

-

Minor asks Gavin if he could form a band with him. Gavin rejects him. He then asks Gavin if he wanted to join the school’s singing competition. Gavin rejects him again, saying that he didn’t perform for unimportant people or have others tell him how well he could play.

MC plays “Falling Slowly” on the piano. Gavin hearing this, learns to play the guitar. He doesn’t know the name of the song but familiarises himself with the melody. [CN Music and the Past Call]

-

Whenever school let students out early, she would go to Lynn’s Kitchen. MC gets her noodles with clear broth, chopped scallions and a half-boiled egg. Gavin usually gets his spicy noodles with garlic, cilantro, thinly sliced beef.

Gavin remembers her favourite order. 

MC leaves a post-it note at Lynn’s Kitchen, “I might never see you again and I didn’t even get to say goodbye. I miss you”, about a friend who transferred schools. 

Gavin knows she hates people who leave without saying goodbye the most.

Gavin, also in the vicinity near Lynn’s Kitchen, writes a post note.  “Until I met you.” [Mystery Box Game]

He saves Mr Noah’s son from an accident, immediately takes him to the hospital and pays for the medical fees. [Anime]

-

Gavin dismisses rumours of high school romance. 

“If you confessed on the 7th step of the stairway in the corner of the 3rd floor then it’ll succeed, or if you carved your name and another person’s name on the 6th tree in the courtyard at the back then your misunderstandings will be resolved, or if a guy gave the girl he liked the second button of his uniform on graduation day then the two of them will end up happy together.”

At lunch, he hears MC talking about the second button, and upon seeing her yearning face, he raises his head in thought, suddenly couldn’t wait for graduation. He tears off his second button. [Mystery Wings Event]

Gavin is just in love at this point.

-

Gavin sees one of the top students stealing money from a shop outside of school. The shopkeeper doesn’t believe him. 

He stops the student on his way home to hand him back the money. 

MC sees him at the alley then leaves.

Gavin spent all the money on a walkman he wanted for a very long time.

Mr Keller was the only one who believed in him. He said to him, “Since you can’t change what others think of you, you might as well just listen to your heart.” This had a great impact on Gavin. [Campus Date] 

Winter 

In the snowfall, the school allowed additional ten minutes of break time. The class next to MC’s stuffed Minor’s shirt with snowballs.

Gavin thought of helping him with a counterattack but MC had already returned a snowball to the male student who pulled the prank. 

Gavin looks at MC the whole time. [CN Recovery ASMR]

-

MC overheads girls in her class say that Gavin had bullied students for lunch money that morning. 

MC rides her bike back home after studying at the library for her finals. 

MC sees Gavin being handed an envelope full of money at Lynn’s Kitchen in an alleyway. 

She mistook it for him taking protection money. 

-

Summer of June 2011

On a humid afternoon, MC looks outside the window of the classroom in boredom. A boy in a loose-fitting school uniform ran by. She couldn’t make out his face. [S1 Chapter 7-23]

MC begins to distance herself from Gavin. She rushes out of class and goes straight home instead.

Gavin is sad. He broods by the piano room, goes to the library to brood, then stares at the place MC sits to brood some more. 

Minor wonders how he’s able to stare all afternoon at an empty space in the library but sleeps all day during class hours. [Minor’s Memory Book]

Before graduation, Gavin’s father expresses his thoughts for Gavin to join the organisation for special training. Gavin refuses, but his father uses MC to influence him to agree. 

Gavin remembers the panic and timidity in MC’s eyes when she first met him. He recalls that moment was probably the hardest to bear in his life.

Gavin in his short period of freedom writes a letter to MC. He ponders about what to say, thinking about their first encounter, and how she started to distance herself from him. But all he writes is-  

“Saturday 9am, I will be at the school library waiting for you.

-Gavin.”

-

MC attends the flag-raising ceremony and rehearses her speech. She then leaves to study for her exams. 

Meanwhile, Gavin finishes a fight with other boys from school in an alley after they talk inappropriately about MC. [Old Days Date]

Gavin, bloodied and bruised, asks Minor to make another copy of his letter. 

This is the only thing that Gavin had asked Minor to do so of course, he agreed. [Chapter 7-11]

Minor thinks the letter is a symbol of passion and fierce love due to the bloodstains and decides to keep the original. 

He writes “GAVIN” and places it on MC’s desk for her to see the next day. 

(In the Campus Date, the older MC is the one who finds him instead of Minor and treats him to his injuries. She ends up seeing the contents of the letter to find him later on.)

MC mistakes the letter as a threat and throws it away. 

That Weekend

Gavin sits for 14 hours in the library waiting for MC, scanning the library every now and then.

With a fingertip, he rubs “Byron’s Poetry Collection” and carefully sandwiches a dried and yellowed ginkgo leaf into the book. He suddenly felt a measure of self-deprecation.

He stands up, and leaves, his heart filled with regret that he didn’t give it to her personally. [CN Tilted Time Rumours and Secrets]

After Summer Break- July 

Minor never saw Gavin, and neither did MC. 

“We met often, but never passed by each other. I remember every moment I saw you in school. Time, location, weather, your expression, your clothes...

-I remember them all.”

[bedlamsbard]

Writing tag game -- tagged by @lessattitudemorealtitude

how many works do you have on Ao3?

Discounting podfic on which I’m listed as a co-author, 24.  My concept writing doesn’t go to AO3 and the vast majority of my Narnia fic was never cross-posted there.  (Or reposted there, actually, I think most of it pre-dates the AO3.)

what’s your total Ao3 word count?

1,050,810.  oh, huh, I didn’t actually realize I’d passed the one million word mark (probably with Crown).

what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

all of these ended up being Star Wars, which is not a huge surprise.  Morning will probably reach Dirt in the next couple of updates, I’d guess.

Immutable, or, Five Times Obi-Wan Kenobi Compromised His Jedi Ethics for Anakin Skywalker -- this is not the oldest Star Wars fic on there, but I think it’s the second oldest. people just really like 5 times fic.

Wake the Storm - did you know that when I started Wake I assumed it was a very niche trope in what was, at the time, a pretty dead fandom? the kudos count on Wake actually outnumbers Gambit by more than 1600 kudos, so the number of people who go from Wake to Gambit is a lot lower than you might think.

Queen's Gambit - a significantly lower kudos count than Wake or Immutable.  Gambit’s such a weirdo of a story, tbh, I can’t be surprised by anything about Gambit anymore.

On the Edge of the Devil's Backbone - about 600 kudos less than Gambit, so less difference between Gambit and Backbone than between Wake and Gambit.

Dirt in the Machine - another older fic.  I’d rewrite this one if I cared enough to do so, because it’s not at my current standards (Immutable isn’t either, for that matter) and I kind of wince every time I get comments on it.  this is the first one of the top five to have below 1K kudos.

do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I’ll usually respond to direct questions, but I very, very seldom respond to comments in general.  This is an old standing policy of mine that’s now more than a decade old -- it used to be I’d wait twenty-four hours before responding, then I’d respond right before the next chapter went up, and for a while I’d only respond to comments on the first few chapters of a story.  Now I just mostly do not.  The reasons for this are: (1) many, many years ago, I lost my temper pretty badly at a comment on a fic of mine (this was pre-AO3, this was back in my LJ days), and after that I moved to the “wait twenty-four hours” response so I didn’t say anything without thinking about it, (2) I do go back and reread comments but I hate rereading my own responses, (3) I prefer to know the comments numbers on my fic are all from actual comments and not from me saying “thanks for reading!”, (4) I can’t take that kind of responsibility for answering every single comment, man.

what’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Of stuff I’ve written in the past ten years? (I can’t really remember before that.)  Maybe Backbone, because it ends on that pretty upbeat “yay team we’re going to be rebels now!” note.  or Devil’s in the Details (other side part 1), though I don’t really want to consider it a finished fic even though it’s technically finished; it has another “yay team we’re back together (minus Ezra)” ending.  I tend to end on complicated and reasonably open endings, not like...happy endings.

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

probably Gambit for the “everything is super fucked up” factor and also the fact that I never wrote the sequel. plus it ended with the entire Wake trio split up in a whole new universe, plus back in the Gambitverse Amidala not able to go back to Naboo, Ahsoka shunned, Palpatine’s new empire, Rex trapped in the Gambitverse, etc.

do you write crossovers?

I did in my Narnia days. I don’t anymore. Working in widespread fandoms like Star Wars or the MCU is basically like writing crossover fic within the same universe, anyway.

have you ever received hate on a fic?

*hysterical laughter*

...yes. yes I have. it’s the reason every time I get a comment notification on Gambit or Wake I freeze in absolute terror. people HATE Wake and Gambit.  I hate to say never, but I will probably never write those characters or in that series again.

do you write smut? if so, what kind?

not really?  I’ve done relatively non-explicit sex but it’s not something I’m super comfortable writing, especially in recent years. I’m much more likely to do a fade to black.

have you ever had a fic stolen?

I think Gambit got scraped once when it was still in progress and my response was something along the lines of “good luck, bro,” given the whole “still in progress” thing.

have you ever had a fic translated?

I’ve gotten a couple of translation requests but I can’t recall if anything’s ever been translated.  (Or if I responded to them...I know a few I forgot to respond.)

have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, back in my Narnia days.  Some SW concept writing and that ended so badly that I’ll never co-write again.

what’s your all-time favourite ship?

Kanan/Hera, of course!

what’s a wip that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

gods, Dust in the Air, my Narnia Last Battle AU.  Back when I started it in 2008 or so I didn’t have the self-control or discipline I do now, even if I had a lot of the worldbuilding ability and the ability to conceive of if not execute long plot arcs, and I broke off more than I could chew.  If I ever went back to it I’d probably have to do a complete rewrite and it has the unique problem among my WIPs of being the last major fic I wrote in present tense -- I now write exclusively in past tense.  The bones of the story are good, I’d just have to go back to the bones and not just pick up where I left off.

what are your writing strengths?

Plot, worldbuilding/environment, action.  I also do genuinely think I’m very good at characterization too, but I think they’re all inter-related.  (Except the action, that’s me alone.  I love writing action and I generally get a lot of compliments on my action scenes.)  look, I know it’s conceited, but I’m good and I know I’m good, and I’m good in a pretty well-rounded way for the genre I write.

what are your writing weaknesses?

brevity. can’t do it.

honestly, there are others, but I don’t write stories where they’d come up.  I think I have a tendency to get to bogged down in dialogue in a way that I’ve never quite solved.  I also let my emotions take over too much and not in the good fannish way, in the “I’m having a fucked up relationship with canon or fandom and it’s affecting my ability to work” way.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

please stop having your Asgardians speak Latin for magic, man, that’s my feeling on it.

okay, my feelings on it for me -- I’ve sprinkled bits and pieces of Huttese, Twi’leki, and tee-tiny bits of other stuff here and there in fic.  I’d not be comfortable doing more than that because the only other language that I really feel comfortable doing anything significant in is Latin, and even then I’d hesitate. also, like, Latin! not a language that comes up in the fandoms I write in.  even then, like -- any extended dialogue should be intelligible to the audience, and I don’t expect my audience to be able read anything other than English; I’d rather just say “they switched to Twi’leki to say” or something similar.

what was the first fandom you wrote for?

like, online? Harry Potter. for things that I didn’t post online because I didn’t know what fic was yet? probably either The 10th Kingdom or The Mummy.

what’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

On the Edge of the Devil’s Backbone.  I think it’s the best thing I’ve ever written, I think it’s the most tightly plotted, I think it’s got the best worldbuilding, I think it’s remarkably consistent thematically, and it was, at the time, a fic that I was very devoted to finishing or dying trying, because I was going through it at the time and some of it was connected to the fic.

I don’t tag people, but please go for if you want!

[adultswim2021]

Robot Chicken #4: “The Sack” | July 4, 2005 – 12:00AM | S01E18 “Adultizzle Swizzle”  re-edit aired April 11, 2008 – 11:00PM

Here’s the deal: this episode is sort of a rarity. So, you’d think I would retain it even a little bit especially right after watching it. But, alas...

This episode is officially out of circulation. I believe it’s available on DVD, but if you try to watch it on television or on HBOMax it is replaced with a 2008 re-edit called “Adultizzle Swizzle”, which has most of the sketches the original did but with the big show-ending sketch “Stix are Intended for Children” replaced with two deleted scenes and a sketch that originally aired as part of the Robot Chicken Star Wars Special. I assume it’s for legal issues that for some reason didn’t effect the content until 2008. I don’t think I’ll dedicate an entire post to this alternate version because I’m trying to avoid getting lost in those kinda weeds for this blog. Maybe a mention? I guess we’ll see.

Listen: this episode went RIGHT THROUGH me. Nothing in here really made me too angry. There was an Alien Vs. Predator sketch where they are on Blind Date, and I remember this sketch and I remember mocking this sketch as if it were the most obvious idea in the world. But I simply shrugged and didn’t laugh at it this time around, eschewing the performative front I put up where bad comedy somehow causes me pain. I guess it did a decent enough job of making fun of the Blind Date editing and stuff. I don’t know man. Who cares. Who cares about any of this.

I’m telling you, I literally just got done watching this and then had to go through a list of sketches to even remember what was on it. I have so little to say about this, it’s crazy. I kinda can’t believe it. It’s not even like last time where I sorta *liked* it, I just am numb to it.

Okay, here’s what really happened: I didn’t actually track down the whole episode as originally aired because the few private sites I use didn’t have it. So I *did* watch the bastardized “Adultizzle Swizzle” version on HBOMax and simply tracked down the offending sketch “Stix are Intended for Children” on vimeo and watched that to approximate watching the full episode. Maybe it really is a shame that I don’t currently possess the DVDs for this, but man do I not wanna have to listen to those dickheads do commentary. I’ve seen Seth Green talk about this show in a commentary-esque way and he seems to have this attitude of “you love this show, but you don’t know why, so I’m going to explain it to you”. It sucks. Anyway, I’m veering off the subject at hand, the Trix rabbit selling cocaine sketch:

The Trix rabbit sells cocaine 

CONTACTING GHOST PLANET...

I don’t really like Robot Chicken. So I will talk about a pre-Adult-Swim Ghost.

Space Ghost Coast to Coast #11a: “Le Livre D'Histoire” | June 9, 1995 | S02E05

Hey! I can COAST on this write-up, because it’s mostly a clip job. Here Lokar hosts two clips, a lengthy excerpt from “The Mask” and one half of “Story Book House”. Lokar mocks the clips snobbishly and squirms from a spider attack. Then he shows some funny videos that are just mundane snippets of people walking around, a guy trying to train his dog, etc. Could this be a veiled reference to Andy Merrill’s own staring turn on America’s Funniest Home Videos? Hmm??

I remember this episode airing as part of the Space Ghost Bootlegger’s Marathon, and it aired as a shortened version. This episode originally ran at a weird length; back in the day I guess the creators were given free reign to just make episodes run anywhere from 11.5 to 23 minutes. When it looked as though there was enough demand for Space Ghost repeats, Adult Swim had to re-edit shows just to get them down to a normal runtime. In the past, Cartoon Network would simply run Cartoon Planet sketches to fill the appropriate amount of time to get it to a full 30 minute time slot. The shortened version cuts out all of Lokar getting bit by spiders and the entire funniest videos bit. It just ends with Lokar yelling “SPACE GHOST IS CRAP!” and then it cuts to a single card with all the credits on it.

Here’s something notable: they state explicitly in this show that Story Book House made fans angry. So it can be taken that this episode is very much intended to be a replacement episode 11 (which is why it’s called episode 11A). I for some reason never quite realized that Story Book was *so* hated to the point that the crew felt the need to actively do something about it and produced a replacement. This is one of the few shows that not only has alternate versions of episodes but also POINTS THIS OUT TO YOU.

I originally went through the Library of Congress listing for Space Ghost in an attempt to pin down a proper date for “The Mask” and “A Space Ghost Christmas”, and I found a few things - some of the episodes are numbered according to the on-screen number, and some are numbered using the internal production codes, which for season one was 94## and 95## for season two. This actually is referred to as episode “9502 (rev.)” - 9502 being “Story Book” and 9501 being “President’s Day Nightmare”. Another thing of note? “Spanish Translation” bears a 9401 code even though we’ve been told over and over that Elevator was the first episode produced. So why did they put Elevator as episode 1 on the DVD? Well, season one wasn’t reported to the Library of Congress records until 1996, so maybe the producers decided to take the opportunity to retcon the production codes. But there’s one thing that’s for certain: I’m the only person in the whole world that cares about this shit.