#possibly due to the wild mood rise n fall of the day

[clxckwork-sun-n-moon]

surprise attack

AAWAAHHGHH demon cuddle counterattack

[kirieshhhka003]

If you don’t mind, can I ask NSFW alphabet with Ghiaccio? 🧊

Note: in all NSFW alphabets I describe how this character acts during sex with different partners, NOT with someone they love

Warnings: NSFW

Ghiaccio NSFW alphabet

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Ghiaccio mostly uses services of high-end prostitutes so he never actually frets over aftercare. Mafioso pays his partners money for sex, why would he care for partner’s well-being after the deed?

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On partner is plump soft lips, so pretty and perfect to wrap around Ghiaccio’s dick while sucking him off neatly. Blue-haired doesn’t really has a body part he’d love on himself, due to his stand’s ability his whole body is worked-out and it’s definitely something to be proud of

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Ghiaccio likes to show his dominance over partner in any possible way, he thinks that cumming on their face is a great way of doing so. Making partner swallow all his sperm down after fucking their throat raw really strokes blue-haired’s ego, he may even stroke their head idly if they did a good job

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Once he had tipsy sex with Melone after one especially hard and stressful mission. They two spent three days haunting their target and planning the killing itself, so at the end, when all work was done, Melone and Ghiaccio went to the nearest bar, hoping to get rid of the stress. And they succeeded. Both of them acted like nothing happened afterwards, just dressed up, fixed their hair and said “See ya soon”, coming home nonchalantly

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

I think that Ghiaccio is about 25, so it’s obvious that he’s pretty experienced (look at this man, he can’t be a virgin). Blue-haired has tried almost everything, so he definitely knows what he’s doing

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

His personal favorites are missionary and all related (so he can choke partner), doggystyle and the one where he fucks partner form behind while laying on the side

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

The only sounds blue-haired wants to hear from his partner during sex are moans, whimpers and pleadings, every other thing will be treated like misbehaving and then punished harshly

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Ghiaccio’s pubes are very curly, but he always keeps himself clean-shaved and he prefers the same on partners, or maybe some fancy trim like heart-shaped carpet

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Blue-haired only expects to receive some pleasure and a few orgasms from his partners, so he definitely won’t treat them like a fragile little doll. Ghiaccio is fairly harsh on himself, so being soft and caring is not about him

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

For Ghiaccio sex is one of the ways to get rid of all the rage he has bubbling within his body, this is why he jacks off often. It almost never lasts for more than 5 mins because man literally wrings orgasm out of himself with a tight fist stroking his dick on the speed of light

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Ooooof, a huge fan of impact play, so facefucking, slapping, hair tugging, degrading and bondage is always on the list. Blue-haired also has a thing for his partner calling him a master or signore, it really just blows his brains out and Ghiaccio turns into monster in bed, fucking his partner mercilessly. Also, dry humping and clothed sex, due to his short temper mafioso sometimes doesn’t have enough patience for undressing, so he just does the deed without getting off his garments

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He usually fucks at the hotel room he’s booked a day before, so wherever inside of apartments is fine. And, we all remember his red sport car, right? Sex there always feels special for man, so this is definitely one of his favorite places to get some quality time

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Ghiaccio’s tantrums are the best motivation ever. Mafioso had a shitty day - he will fuck then to get rid of the stress. It’s pretty hard to make mafioso going if he’s not in the right mood, no matter how hard partner try

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Water sports and all related. Just no. Ghiaccio is up to try everything, but this is his big no-no

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

One of his main kinks is facefucking so Ghia is all for a good blowjob. But when it comes to going down on someone… well, he’s not a fan. Especially when man has sex with prostitutes, he won’t ever go down on sex worker. It’s not like he’s disgusted of them or anything, it just doesn’t feel right for him (but not with someone Ghiaccio has feelings for, he’d gladly spend hours settled between beloved’s legs)

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Ghiaccio is kinda selfish in bed, doing whatever he wants, not caring much about partner’s feelings or preferences. Mafioso is always fast and rough, all his movements are harsh, his words are pure filth, but if partner are on some kinky stuff - Ghiaccio is a perfect option

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

A HUGE FAN OF THEM! Ghiaccio loves sex, and even a 10 min session rises his mood for a little and helps to calm down, it may be penetration, oral or dry humping. The only bad thing about quickies is if he picks the last option, blue-haired is supposed to spend the rest of the day with his pants full of cum

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Mafioso enjoys having car sex, and it definitely means something. It’s not about public places like park or crowded beach, but semi-public places as club restroom or dressing room are always on the list

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Ghiaccio may last for a lot of rounds, 5 or 10, it all depends on his mood, but every round doesn’t last for long - 5-8 mins in general. But he also can go for 2-3 make out sessions during a day, each of them may consist of 5 rounds

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Ghiaccio prefers doing everything with his own hands (especially fingers hehehe), so his collection of toys starts and ends with two different-sized gags

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He’s really into orgasm denial, but only on his partners. If they try to tease him, well, it definitely won’t end up well for them

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Ghiaccio has really dirty mouth, so he won’t shut up, degrading and insulting his partner to no end, calling them a whore and filthy slut, so greedy for his cock inside of them. Blue-haired also lets out quiet groans and swearings, but he never moans, thinking that it’s definitely not cool and manly

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Ghiaccio is terrified of the thought of accidentally making a baby, so at the age of 23 he got his vasectomy surgery. But he still uses condoms, mafioso cares for his health and perspective of getting HIV is definitely not that appealing

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Blue-haired is 5,5 inches when fully hard, slightly curved, head is a little bit pinker than the shaft, more on the thinner side. Totally smooth, a single vein pokes at the bottom part of the shaft, closer to the base

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

On the calm days Ghiaccio’s sex drive is normal, low you could say, he’s just living his best life, enjoying random simple things. But on hard days (which happened to be almost every day), mafioso tries his best to suppress his urge to kill everyone, so his yearning is really high

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Blue-haired feels a little bit sleepy after cumming, but Ghiaccio is not the one for sleeping after sex. He just zips his pants back up and continues doing whatever he was, just like nothing happened

Masterlist | Smut Masterlist

[winterscaptain]

in the dark.

Aaron Hotchner x Gender Neutral Reader

request from anon: I dont know if you've already done something like this 😅 But can you do a hotch x new bau member? Like her and hotch are already a thing and they try to keep it hidden (and they do for a like a month) before someone makes the connection. Just a big secret fluff fest?

a/n: ask and you shall receive anon! secret fluff fests happen to be my specialty, and you’ll need hella mouthwash and floss for this one to avoid cavities. i had SO much fun writing this one and couldn’t wait until the morning to post it.  words: 4,791 (whoops) warnings: some swearing, nothing too wild. 

part two!

AO3 | Masterlist | Requests Closed for Now!

+++

You stepped into the elevator and took it to the sixth floor, where you knew the exact route you needed to take to avoid the BAU bullpen. You’d been called to Erin Strauss’s office, pulled from the heavy caseload at CARD for some kind of mystery meeting with the adjacent section chief.

Checking your watch, you figured that there would be enough time to for a visit before returning to the eighth floor if this meeting didn’t run too long.

“Good morning, Agent. Thank you for coming in.”

You were halfway impressed – you’d barely made it through the door when she started talking. “Good morning, ma’am.”

She stood, handing you a folder. “This shouldn’t take too long, but you’re welcome to sit.”

You flipped through the folder, taking a seat in one of the chairs across from her desk. “A transfer from CARD, ma’am?”

Erin nodded. “I’d like you to try a stint in the BAU. We are working to fill a few roles as the unit’s caseload increases, and when asked, your unit chief did not hesitate to recommend you.”

Oh god.

Your thought died on your tongue before it could leave your mouth.

That was a problem for another time.

You cleared your throat to cover the rising heat in your cheeks. “Yes, ma’am. Of course.”

“You should have no issues settling into the team. Your new unit chief, Aaron Hotchner, is a strong personality, and I am the first person to tell you he’s not always easy to get along with –“

You stifled a laugh, covering it with a light cough into your elbow.

“- but his team is very capable. If you have any issues at all, feel free to bring them to me.” She placed her reading glasses back on her nose and signed something in front of her.

“Shall I report to Agent Hotchner today?”

Agent Hotchner. That’s a goddamn crackup.

“No, not today. I’ll get everything in order for your arrival tomorrow. Report at 9am tomorrow. Agent Hotchner will be ready for you.”

You’re damn right he will.

+++

You rolled over in bed and burrowed into the warm body beside you. To get any closer, you’d have to be under his skin.

Aaron grumbled and managed to pull you even closer, one arm spanning the length of your spine and the other resting across your thigh where it was slung over his hip.

You were somewhere between sleeping and waking for the next hour or so. The slow rise and fall of Aaron’s chest under your cheek brought you a bone-deep calm, letting you rest comfortably in that liminal space.

You were prepared when Aaron’s alarm went off, a full half-hour before it normally did.

“Early meeting?” you asked, as if you didn’t already know.

He hummed an affirmative and tipped your chin up with one finger. “No earlier than usual, but I want to get settled in before the day starts.”

My favorite Type-A Unit Chief.

You smiled against his mouth, stretching up into his kiss. It quickly turned less-than chaste, your tongues sliding together and your hands wandering across his chest and back. The raised ridges of his scars marked your path as you traced invisible patterns on his skin. You knew his body as well as he did, maybe better, and he yours.

After a few minutes, you came to your senses and pulled back. He looked dazed, his lips swollen and plush, his hair soft and tousled on top of his head.

“You have no business looking that good when you have to leave early,” you said with a light laugh. You carded your fingers through the hair at his temples, taking the opportunity to sweep your thumb across his cheekbone.  

He gave you a crooked grin and reached for you again. You rolled away from him, pressing your palms to his chest and locking your elbows.

“If you keep this up, you’re gonna be late.”

Aaron rolled his eyes and threw the covers back, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. You launched yourself across the bed and wrapped your arms around him, tracing the lines of his chest and abdomen with light and playful fingers.

“As you so astutely pointed out, I will be late if you keep this up.” His chastisement was weak, at best.

You pressed kisses to the space between his shoulder blades and pushed him out of bed. He turned around and brought your face between his hands, pressing a series of kisses against your lips.

How he ever makes it to work on time, I have no idea.

+++

At about 8:50 that morning, Strauss knocked twice on Aaron’s open office door before letting herself in.

Aaron looked up. After processing who it was, he set his pen down and laced his fingers.

Why is she always ten minutes early?

“Good morning, ma’am.”

“Good morning, Agent Hotchner.” She looked a little antsy, but he wasn’t sure if that was just her general affect, or something more specific.

“What can I do for you this morning?”

“You have a new agent reporting to your unit this morning. Highly recommended. An asset. Please be welcoming.” She was short and to the point, but it made Aaron’s head hurt.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “All due respect, ma’am, it has been very difficult for me to manage these new agents with such little notice.”

“I understand, but that is my call and not yours.” Aaron suppressed a sigh as she continued. “You’re perfectly capable of managing a larger team, especially one with such capable agents.” She placed the personnel file on his desk and walked out, leaving the door open behind her.

“Damn it,” he said to himself. There was no point in reviewing the file – it was entirely possible Strauss told the agent to report at nine, which means they would probably arrive early, which means –

“Aaron?”

He looked up at the door and his face broke out into a smile in spite of his sour mood. After a quick moment, he sobered and picked up the file on his desk. “I can’t chat long, sweetheart – I have a new agent reporting this morning.”

You did your best to look both politely interested and appropriately surprised.

“Oh, of course, love. I’ll leave you to it.” You were still smiling at him, waiting for it all to click into place.

“Thank you. It shouldn’t be long. We haven’t been called on a case yet this week, and the new agent will have to sit with Dave to work through a couple of consults so I can get a better read on capabilities...” He trailed off, distracted. He opened the file but didn’t look down, his gaze still stuck on you.

You sauntered back toward him. Your palms met the cool wood of the desk as you leaned over it and kissed him lightly. His shaky exhale fanned across your face – restraint evident in his posture. You were taunting him, and he knew it.

But the door was closed....damn it.

He still hadn’t looked down at the file, but a small smile dancing around his mouth. “You can’t be here. My new agent will be here in a few minutes, at the very most.”

“Who’s the agent?”

He shook his head and glanced down at the file. He did a double-take, and the only thing more comical than his head flying back up was the pink flush that rushed to his cheeks.

There was silence for a moment as you watched him process the information before him. 

“You’re my new agent,” he said. It wasn’t a question.

You winked at him.

“Did you ask?”

You shook your head and sat, leaning back in the chair and getting comfortable.

“When did you find out?”

“Yesterday.”

He closed the file and set it back on his desk. His arms crossed as he reclined in his chair, an eyebrow raised at you.

You finally gave in, resting your elbows on his desk and your chin in your hands. “Are you upset?”

He laughed, and you were happy the door was closed. There was no way you could keep anything from the team if they’d heard that. “No, I’m not upset. We’ll just have to compartmentalize a little bit. It won’t be easy, and we’ll have to tell Strauss eventually.”

“Let’s just see how long it takes for the team to pick up on it, and we’ll go from there. What do you think?” Keeping a team of profilers in the dark was no easy task, but you were up to the challenge.

Aaron’s face drops into his normal operating expression – stoic and a little skeptical. You’d seen it before, and you supposed you’d grow even more accustomed to it soon enough. “That sounds perfectly reasonable, Agent. You can speak to facilities about getting a desk downstairs. Report to Agent Rossi next door – he will walk you through all of our procedures.”

You suppressed a smile and stood. “Thank you, sir. Will that be all?”

He returned to his report, but there was a smile threatening at the corner of his mouth. “Yes, Agent. That will be all. Thank you.”

This was going to be fun.

+++

Your first three cases went smoothly. You quickly endeared yourself to the team and had a natural knack for building geographical profiles with Reid. Hotch did his best to pay you very little mind in the field, only to knock on your hotel room door in the very small hours of the morning.

The humor in referring to him as “Hotch” and “Agent Hotchner” and “Sir” hadn’t worn off yet. You had to suppress a smile every single time. It was easier for him, as he was so accustomed to working with his natural stoicism. The hardest part for the both of you was avoiding anything that looked like familiarity. Casual brushes of his arm, catching his sleeve, his hand on your lower back as you got into the car – it all had to go.

You’re new. You’re new. You don’t know anyone. Keep it together.

It was a game, in some ways, and one you both enjoyed playing for different reasons.

“How are you liking it so far?” Emily asked, dropping down next to you on the jet.

Aaron was across from you at the table, and you’d been playing a quiet game of footsie for the better part of fifteen minutes. You pulled away first, tucking one foot under you as you turned to face Emily.

“So far so good,” you replied. “It’s a little bloodier than CARD, but dealing with adults is always easier than dealing with parents.”

She laughed lightly and clicked her tongue. “Well, once you get your first case with kids, we’ll revisit that one.” She lowered her voice, not that Hotch wouldn’t be able to hear her. “They’re always particularly hard on JJ and Hotch, you know.”

You nodded sagely. “I can imagine.”

Hotch raised his eyebrows, but said nothing.

She bumped your shoulder with hers and invited you to drinks with Derek and Penelope when all the paperwork was finished.

“Sure,” you said, beaming. “I’d love to.”

You looked back down at your tablet as she rose to find a better place to nap. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a minuscule grin on Aaron’s face and returned it with one of your own.

+++

“Oh c’mon everyone has a crush on someone in their section,” JJ exclaimed, looking to Penelope for confirmation. All of you, save for Aaron and Dave, piled into the car and went to the bar when you finished your case reports.

Garcia nodded. “Oh absolutely. Have you seen those TASK guys?”

“Hey, I’m right here.” Morgan pulled on one of her pigtails. She stuck her tongue out at him.

“No but seriously,” Emily said. ��Anyone catching your eye?”

You shrugged noncommittally, sipping your drink. “Not really.”

JJ squinted at you. “You might want to rethink lying to a bunch of profilers.”

“I thought profiling each other was against the rules!”

Emily rolled her eyes. “Well yeah, but that’s mostly for the big stuff, and it’s more a suggestion than a rule.”

“I thought I saw you eyein’ our fearless leader last week,” Penelope said with a sly grin.

You rolled your eyes and took a sip of your drink, buying yourself some time. You knew exactly what she was talking about – a press conference, in which Hotch shut down a particularly combative reporter with a practiced finesse. You’d failed to hide your smile before Penelope caught you, on one of her rare outings on a case.

“Yeah! I watched you guys on that last case. He’s way nicer to you than he was to me when I first got here.” Emily sounded a little hurt and a lot indignant.

Derek bumped your shoulder with his and gestured to Emily. “That’s because she was insufferable when she first got here,” he stage-whispered.

Emily looked damn near close to throwing her drink at him when you finally relented.

“Okay, fine. I may or may not have noticed that Hotch is...attractive.” You tried your best to sound more evasive and far less sure than you were. You were certain Aaron was one of the finer men you’d ever laid your eyes on, but they didn’t need to know that.

“Aha!” JJ said with a laugh. “I knew it!”

“What?” You asked

“You’ve got a crush on Ho-“ She shut her mouth abruptly as her gaze shifted over your shoulder. Emily swiftly took a massive sip of her drink and set it down a little too roughly.

You all turned around, only to find Hotch standing behind you at the bar.

“Am I too late?”

“No!” Penelope said, a little too quickly. “Not at all. Here, take my seat.”

She vacated the seat beside you, and you shot her a look.

You were playing your part well, and so was Aaron. With a small smile, he sat beside you.

“Settling in okay?” He asked. The bartender placed a beer in front of him, and he winked at you when he took a drink.

“Ah,” you said. “Emily beat you to that question,” you checked your watch, “about an hour ago. I think I said something about it being a little bloodier than I imagined, and that my new boss is a real hardass.”

+++

When you stumbled through the door of his apartment, a bit flushed and a little tipsy, you couldn’t stop laughing. You toed off your shoes and collapsed into his chest, looping your arms around his neck.

“Emily was trying so hard to weasel something out of me! You should have seen her, Aaron it was hilarious.”

He pulled you close and pressed his cold nose into your neck. You jumped and gave his hair a swift tug.

He looked up and his eyes darkened. You knew that look.

My God, he’s handsome.

“What do you say we string them along a little longer?” He asked, his voice low and rough.

You gulped. “I think that’s a great idea.” It came out a little higher and a little breathier than you intended, but he tended to have that effect on you.

+++

You had just turned off the light when there was a knock on your hotel room door. With a sigh, you hauled yourself back out of bed and opened the door.

Aaron was on the other side, in his flannel pajama pants and one of his many black crew-neck t-shirts. He looked exhausted, but that was normal when you were on the road. 

“Want any company?”

As if he had to ask.

You stepped back, letting him in and locking the door behind him. He had a hand on you almost the entire time, fingers glancing across your skin as you felt your way across the room in the dark.

When you both settled under the covers, he wrapped around you, pulling you flush against him with your back to his chest. Within minutes, you were already dozing, safe and warm in his embrace.

“Hey, Y/N?” It was almost a whisper.

You matched his volume, as to not break the sanctity of the darkness. “Yeah?”

“I love you.”

It wasn’t the first time he’d told you, not by a long shot. Nevertheless, it never lost its novelty. Maybe he said it a little differently or maybe you heard it a little differently each time he said it, but it always managed to set off a wave of affection that originated somewhere near your sternum.

You took his hand from where it rested against your abdomen and pressed a kiss to his palm. “I love you too.”

When your alarm woke you in the morning, he was gone. A note covered your phone where it rested on the nightstand. His blocky, even script danced in even lines across the paper.

Sweetheart,

I had to get back to my room before the others got up, but I didn’t want to wake you. I’ll see you at the precinct in a couple of hours.

I love you (even when you snore).

- AH

You scoffed. You’d get him back for that later.

I don’t snore, Aaron Hotchner.

+++

The laughter carried out of Aaron’s office and down the hall, where Dave was reading at his desk. He set his book down – the latest advance copy of a friend’s draft he’d offered to go over as a favor – and listened.

He thought he was mistaken, but he could swear he heard Aaron laughing, too.

And laughing he was. You were reaching forward with great ambition. Your one knee giving you leverage on the desk, one foot keeping your balance on one of the chairs, trying in vain to snatch the pen from his hand.

“Give it to me! You’ve been here for hours!”

Aaron’s left arm stretched high into the air as he reclined in his seat, the pen in question entirely out of your reach.

You changed tactics, bracing yourself against the desk as you leaned forward and snatched his tie. You pulled it, tugging him toward you. Your lips crashed together, and you wound the tie around your fingers to keep him close to you.

Kissing Aaron never got old. He relaxed into you, leaning forward. His hands were warm on your face, his thumbs sweeping across your cheekbones. You could feel the pen resting against your skin between his index and middle fingers.

You brought your hand to his wrist, your thumb at his pulse point. It was always reassuring to know he was here and alive. But there was, of course, an ulterior motive.

When you slid your fingers up the side of his hand, you took the pen from between his fingers. You threw it over your shoulder and he laughed into your mouth. You pulled back and kissed his nose. He looked at you, and you looked back for a moment, the outside world forgotten.

Meanwhile, Dave had left his office, peering through the not-so-closed blinds and listening through the open door.

“How long were you planning to keep us in the dark, kids?”

You jumped apart, skittering to your feet and turning around. At attention, you heard Aaron sigh and slowly rise to his feet.

“Dave, I –“

Rossi waved him off with a wide smile. “No need. As long as I get to be in on it, I’ll drag the rest along as long as you’d like.”

He crossed the office and took your face in his hands, kissing you on both cheeks. At your left, he whispered in your ear. “Thank you for taking care of his heart.”

+++

“Oh, you are so busted.”

Aaron froze where he stood, closing the door to your hotel room. He grit his teeth and took a breath. “JJ –“

She sauntered up to him with a smug smile. When she reached his shoulder, she shoved him playfully, her façade breaking immediately. She dropped her voice to a whisper. “I’m so happy for you.”

The corner of his mouth lifted in an almost-smile. “Thanks.”

Just then, you opened your door, holding his FBI windbreaker and fully expecting to sneak down the hall to his room. “Aaron, love, you forgot – fuck.”

JJ laughed. “For a pair of profilers, you two really suck at sneaking around.”

Your stomach dropped. “Do the others know?”

“I think Dave has picked up on a few things –“

Aaron shot you a look, but JJ was still looking at you.

“- and I think the rest of them are just hoping you’ll get your shit together.” She shrugged. “I’ll keep it under wraps – I’ve got money on another four months and I intend to rob Emily blind.”

You snorted, but Aaron grabbed your wrist – a warning.

Don’t tell her Dave knows, that touch said.

Just as Aaron predicted, she kept talking. “If you hold out for me, I’ll give you a third.” She raised her eyebrows and extended her hand to you.

“Deal,” you said.

She sighed, chuffed, and almost danced down the hallway. “See you later!”

+++

The ride home was quiet, with almost everyone asleep. Hotch was kicked back in one of the seats, his eyes closed, brow drawn, and arms crossed. You always tried to put yourself where you could see him, without getting too close.

Derek sat beside you, and you thought he was asleep, when –

“Are you gonna tell me what’s goin’ on between you and Hotch?”

You looked at him over your nose. “I don’t know what you’re referring to. You’re gonna have to be more specific.”

He removed his headphones entirely, keeping them around his neck. “Oh come on. You might be able to trick the rest of them, but not me.”

It was true. Derek was the one you had your eye on from the beginning, and Hotch had told you to remain especially vigilant around him.

When you didn’t say anything, Derek continued.

“I’ve seen the way he looks at you. You’re better at hiding it than he is.”

Your cheeks warmed, and a smile pulled at your lips. “Really?”

He nodded. “Hotch is a sucker when he’s in love. I saw it when I first met Haley, and I see it with you.

“I’ve got money on catching you guys next week, so let’s keep this on the low for now. I will, however, be very impressed if you manage to keep this under wraps much longer than that.” He shrugged. “If JJ wins, I’ll babysit Jack for a night so you guys can go out on a real date.”

You offered your hand, and he shook it once. “You’ve got yourself a deal, Morgan.”

He put his headphones back on, tipped his head back, and closed his eyes.

When you glanced up, Hotch’s eyes were watching, half-lidded. You knew he heard the whole thing. He gave you one of his smiles that wasn’t quite a smile and closed his eyes again.

+++

A few nights later, you all had plans to meet up at Dave’s for dinner. You and Aaron were there a little early and could take a few minutes to relax. You were curled up on the couch at Hotch’s side, his arms wrapped around you to pull you snug to his chest. Dave had a movie on – one of those loud action movies starring some famous bald guy with an iconic one-liner and a bad attitude.

You got so caught up in the movie you didn’t hear Spencer and Penelope arrive. By this point, you were halfway into Aaron’s lap, his cheek against your temple, and your fingers tracing patterns on the hand that rested on your hip.

“Oh. My. God.” Penelope stopped dead in her tracks, snatching Spencer’s sleeve.

At this point, it was just funny. You looked up at Aaron and laughed, tucking further into him. He kissed your forehead and looked up at them over your head.

“Where’d you have your money, Garcia?” He asked.

Penelope shrugged. “I’m out, I had three weeks ago, on the Nevada case.”

“I had a maximum of seven months, based on our last bought of big secret-keeping,” said Spencer. “So I’m out too. We’re going on eight months and five days, now. Emily’s up next, at the nine-to-nine-and-a-half month mark.”

They plopped down on the couch beside you, and you disentangled yourself from Aaron. Penelope glommed on to your arm. “What are we watching?”

+++

The end of the night found Dave, JJ, Derek, You, Aaron, and Penelope outlasting Emily, who graciously offered to drive Spencer home. You and Aaron were cleaning up in the kitchen, visible through the big window, while the rest of the team lounged by the firepit.  You sprayed Aaron with water from the sink, and he swatted you with a towel. Very few dishes were actually washed.

They couldn’t hear your laughter, but they saw it written all over your faces.

“So,” Derek started. “Who knew?”

They all shared a look for a moment before bursting into laughter. They realized the game you played was better than the one they thought.

“Who’s the only one who doesn’t?”

JJ smirked into her wine glass. “Oh, that would be Emily.”

Derek offered the neck of his beer bottle, and JJ clinked her glass against it. “How’d you manage that?”

“Nuh-uh. Not a chance. I don’t kiss and tell.” She winked at him.

+++

“Oh, goddamn it, you guys! You couldn’t have done this last month?” Emily threw her hands in the air.

She’d just pulled the kitchen divider curtain on the jet home from an exceedingly long case. When you last checked, everyone was fast asleep. Even then, though, you’d grown more lax in the off-hours – Emily’s bet had long since lapsed, and everyone else (who mattered) knew.

You sat on the counter, with Hotch leaning between your legs. He was making a cup of coffee, seemingly uninhibited by the obstacle of your body. Your phone was in one hand, and the other was resting casually on Aaron’s shoulder, playing with the hair behind his ear.

Aaron stood up straight, his coffee in his hand. With his usual deadpan, he took a sip and said, “Sin to win weekend is coming up, if you’re worried about your account balance.”

There was a snort from behind her, and you belatedly realized her exclamation had woken the rest of the team. JJ was already collecting cash from Dave and Derek. She ruffled Spencer’s hair on her way past him. Derek dialed Penelope, and almost immediately had to take the phone away from his ear to avoid premature deafness.

JJ stood before Emily with one hand on her cocked hip and the other extended palm up, right under Emily’s nose.

Emily scoffed and pulled out her wallet. “You suck.”

+++

Three Months Later

There was a knock on your door, and you smiled to yourself as you signed another document. “Come in.”

The familiar figure sat at the chair across from you, kicking up his feet like he owned the place. You didn’t look up from your work.

“Get your feet off my desk, Hotchner.”

He huffed, but the dress shoes disappeared from the polished surface. They were soon replaced by a pair of elbows and a set of ten laced fingers. 

It was nice to be back in CARD. A couple of people from the Critical Response Team had transferred out of the unit, leaving significant gaps in leadership. You were now the Special Agent In Charge for Northeast CARD operations and Deputy Unit Chief – duel positions that kept you mostly chained to your desk unless something went horribly awry.

There was no need for Aaron and you to sneak around anymore, but you missed it a little. A secret was a little exciting – something that was just yours.

But then again, that was the thing about love. It didn’t have to be exciting to make your chest feel too small for all the things you kept inside of it.

You finally looked up from your file, closing it and pushing it off to the side. Warm eyes met you across the desk.

“What can I help you with, Agent Hotchner?” Your tone was crisp and professional, but you reached for his hand, and he took it.

He rolled his eyes. “The team is going out tonight.”

“And?” You raised an eyebrow.

He stood without releasing your hand and rounded your desk, pulling you to your feet. “You’re coming with us.”

“I am?”

A tug and you were pulled flush against him. “Of course.”

“And after?”

“Jack’s with his grandparents for the weekend,” he said.

When you kissed him, you could feel his smile against your lips.

+++

tagging: @arganfics @quillvine @stxrryspencer @agenthotchner @hurricanejjareau @fics-ilike @octothorpetopus @ange-must-die @ughitsbaby @rousethemouse @criminalsmarts @dr-reid-ismyspiritanimal @shrimpyblog @genevievedarcygranger @ssaic-jareau @saintd0lce @good-heavens-chris-evans @davidrossi-ismydad @angelsbabey @gublergirls 

@vintagecaptainspidey @venusbarnesmb @writefasttalkevenfaster (thought this might be up your alley, but let me know i’ve im overstepping at all xo)

[frostsoldier]

A Certain Step

No warnings, just fluff except one line of Bucky's injury, but not detailed. Bucky x Reader Regency AU. 4,882 words.

A/N: This is a repost of something I wrote in 2017. Since then I lost most of my work, but was able to find this one and clean it up a bit. I also updated it to use fewer physical descriptions of the reader. Thanks @shreddedparchment ​for encouraging me to repost. Enjoy!

“Y/N! Y/N wake up, child! Captain and Mrs. Wentworth's ball is tonight and we must get ready! Don’t laze about!”

Y/N Y/L/N sat up in bed, ignoring the dizziness that came from moving too quickly. Her mother was right, she had overslept already and needed to prepare.

She pulled on her slip and, as she combed through her closet, thought about how she would like to present herself that evening. As the only daughter of a local gentleman – who earned enough in his mercantile ventures for his wife and child to live comfortably, but not enough for them to attend balls as regularly as their neighbors – she owned few dresses that would be presentable at a captain’s ball. Hiring a coach and horses, purchasing new dresses, and stocking up on ribbons – for who can forget ribbons – add up quickly.

Y/N was certainly considered beautiful, but without a large dowry she was in no danger of wicked men trying to snatch a fortune. She was lucky enough that, whomever she was to marry, her parents encouraged her to marry them for love, as they did.

She decided on a white muslin dress with her favorite lilac ribbon tied around the high, empire waistline. The muslin base was overlaid with a sheer covering with white stars she embroidered herself. She styled her hair up on her head, dotted it with wild forget-me-nots, and allowed some of the locks to escape and frame her face. Her mother came into her room, adjusted her hair to fall more evenly, and nodded in approval at her reflection.

"There. Aren't you lovely? Now, we have a little time before we must leave. Why don't you work on your bonnet you were trimming? Though, I think you and I both know you’re more likely to read that novel you keep going on about!"

"Yes, mother."

Y/N made her way to the parlor to read the latest novel she purchased in town. Her mother was right, she’d rather read than trim the hat she got stuck on three days ago and has refused to touch since.

Too soon it was time to go. She clambered into the small coach along with her mother and father with assistance from the coachman. As the wheels clattered down the dirt roads, her mother couldn't help but gush over the possibilities of the evening. Her father pretended to watch the countryside pass out the window, but Y/N knew he was listening to his wife's excitement. He had a small smile that he hid behind his hand while resting his elbow on the sill.

Her parents loved each other like no other couple she knew; the term wedded bliss seemed to be made for them. She was animated and cheerful, he was reserved and coy; together the two of them could be mischievous if they put their minds to it, which they often did.

She only hoped to have a love like theirs one day, but due to her small dowry she knew there was the possibility that she would marry a local, small-minded land owner who wouldn't encourage reading or dancing.

If there were three things in life she loved, it was reading, laughing, and dancing. No matter the tune or dance, she was a natural. The rises and falls of the music always moved her feet, whether it was a quadrille, a reel, or the slowly dying minuet, she loved all dance. Most young gentlemen that caught her eye were avid dancers.

The coach slowly pulled up to the hall as her family piled out. Her parents greeted the Wentworths, Mrs. Wentworth commenting on how lovely she looked this evening while Captain Wentworth and Mr. Y/L/N promising a drink together later.

As she walked through the doors the familiar feeling of awe and anticipation washed over her. The first dance was already starting on the wooden floors of the wide room. Chaperones were standing and sitting on the sides of the hall, some watching their charges more carefully than others. Men were flowing in and out of the card room, laughing and drinking along to the music. The musicians were in a balcony above the head of the room and several lines of dancers flowed down to the bottom. Young folks chatted and flirted at the ends of the sets while making sure they were ready to hop into the fray when the dance reached them. One young lady was so lost in observing her partner’s uniform that she started to balance when the rest of her set went to moulinet. She rushed to join back in, but the damage was done, and Y/N could see how embarrassed the young woman was.

Her mother came up next to her and entwined their arms as they walked through the room.

“There are many young people here tonight, especially with both the militia and Captain Wentworth’s men in town,” her mother said. “What do you think, has anyone caught your eye yet?”

“Mother! We’ve only just arrived!”

“You can’t blame me for asking, dear. You are my only child and I want nothing more for you than to be swept off your feet in a suitable match.”

“And what do you consider suitable for me, mother?”

“Well,” she started, glancing around the room at the gentlemen. “To start he must be handsome enough to tempt you, but kind and gentle. He must be well-read and – a definite requirement – he must enjoy dancing as you do.”

“I don’t know if anyone enjoys dancing as much as I do,” Y/N said, her mood faltering slightly.

“To be fond of dancing is a certain step toward falling in love, my dear," her mother confided in her. "Why, your father and I met in a ball just like this when I was your age and someday there will be a young gentleman who will love you just as much as he loves me. Who knows; maybe a suitor will make himself known tonight?"

She winked and turned back toward the room to view the ladies in their finery and the gentlemen viewing the ladies as well. Y/N laughed, shook her head, and returned to gazing about the room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As they spoke, two gentlemen entered the assembly. The first to enter was blond with sweeping shoulders and dressed in the scarlet regimentals of the militia. His black boots clicked against the floor as he strutted into the room.

Following him in, the second had long, chocolate hair tied low by his neck and a clean-shaved, sharp jaw. He was dressed in the blue regulations of the Navy and the white lapels of a Lieutenant. His shoulders and arms strained against the sleeves of his embroidered blue coat, which he wore unbuttoned with his white linen shirt and neckcloth showing through. His expansive legs were covered by breeches and stockings, his black leather boots polished as to reflect the lights of the chandeliers above.

“Captain Rogers! Lieutenant Barnes! So glad you both could make it, gentlemen,” Captain Wentworth exclaimed as he approached the two newcomers.

“Thank you for inviting us,” Captain Rogers, the blond gentleman, responded. He gave a short bow to his Naval counterpart.

“Lieutenant Barnes, it’s good to see you out and about again. How’s your arm treating you?”

“As well as it can be, considering,” the lieutenant said in a slightly gruff voice. “I’m just glad to still be here, sir.”

“No need to ‘sir’ me here, we’re not on the Sophie now!”

Lt. Barnes smiled, knowing his former captain will always be his leader, “Sorry, force of habit.”

“No matter,” Captain Wentworth shrugged and gestured to the room. “Please, enjoy yourselves! Anne planned this evening for all to enjoy themselves.”

Captain Rogers and Lt. Barnes made their way through the room, chatting and admiring the general splendor.

It was then that Lt. Barnes heard the most beautiful sound: a laugh rising above the music and chatter. He searched about himself, looking for the source.

He soon found her, her head shaking side to side and loose strands of her Y/H/C locks moving with the motion. Her perfect lips were still curved in the aftermath of her laughter.

As she raised her head to gaze around the room, her Y/E/C eyes caught his stormy blue ones. They stared at each other in shock and the room seemed to lose all sound for a moment until she remembered herself and averted her eyes with heat rising to her cheeks.

He turned back to his friend, who had been admiring a brunette with soft curls from a distance.

“Rogers, do you know who that woman is?” Lt. Barnes said, clasping his friend on the shoulder to bring his attention in the direction of the beautiful creature.

The captain forced his eyes from his prospective partner for the evening and followed his friend’s gaze. He saw the young lady and didn’t recognize her at first, but saw the older woman she was with and inferred her identity.

“Why, that’s Miss Y/N Y/L/N! I’ve known her longer than I’ve known you. We grew up down the lane from one another!”

‘Y/N…’ Lt. Barnes thought, ‘A lovely name for an even lovelier girl. She looks like a doll…’

He shook his head and asked Captain Rogers to describe her.

“Well, she’s accomplished. She can embroider anything, makes hats and pillows, plays the piano forte, not a strong singer, mind you.” He looked back at his friend, and knew exactly what answer he was looking for. “She’s smart and witty too; a bit shy, but when she dances, she really opens up and enjoys herself.”

Lt. Barnes nodded and turned away from Y/N, walking toward the other side of the room. Captain Rogers was left standing in place, wondering what he said to upset his companion.

In truth, he had said everything right. Lt. Barnes may grow to like that girl, maybe even love her if he dared to hope. Only if.

While he has had the opportunity of winning prizes in his Naval career, it hasn’t left him unscarred mentally or physically and it weighed on his mind in the ballroom.

He has killed hundreds of men in the heat of battle. Fathers, husbands, sons, all of them had families they would never return to all in the name of the king and to prevent the tyrant Bonaparte from taking England into his clutches. He knew that if he didn’t do it, someone else would have to, or more English men might have died. It weighed so heavily on his mind some days that sleep eluded him for fear of the nightmares.

No woman deserved to share her marriage bed with a man half in agony.

Physically he was healthy – years of working on a ship has made him strong – but a life on a man of war has its risks. One of the largest causes of injuries on a ship was the shrapnel: pieces of wood that splinter due to cannonballs flying through the ship’s side.

It was one such exchange of cannon fire that caused his injury Captain Wentworth inquired about. He was below deck, assisting a gun crew after a midshipman had been struck, when a cannonball passed just to his left through an already weakened portion of the hull. The shrapnel ripped through his coat and shirt altogether.

The result was a devastating injury to most of his left arm, which remained covered in scars from his wrist up to his shoulder. He remained self-conscious of them long after the wound had healed, and they still bothered him sometimes, especially when it rained.

No woman deserved to be on the arm of a man who couldn’t even stand that arm himself.

As he continued to circle the room, he noticed Y/N again, this time helping a poor young lady off the floor after she was knocked over by a clumsy boy running through the hall. Concern splayed across on her face and her kindness radiated enough to reach him in his dark moment. As the young lady thanked her and went back to her party, Y/N looked up and their eyes met again. He bowed his head and she gave the slightest of a curtsy, the limit of what interaction they could have without being properly introduced.

As she turned back to, who he assumed was her mother, he decided to try to be worthy of her kindness, at least as an acquaintance and even if his heart yearned for more.

He wove through the crowds back toward Captain Rogers. When he met with him, Lt. Barnes leaned close to his ear.

“My friend, would you please introduce me to Miss Y/L/N? I find that I’ve been caught in staring when I cannot look away and am afraid she may think poorly of me before she even knows my name.”

The captain gave a wide, toothy smile at his friend, who was already enthralled with Y/N again.

“Of course. Shall we?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N first saw the young Naval officer when their eyes met after her mother’s cheeky remark. She observed that she was not the only young lady in the room who appreciated his appearance. He, however, didn’t seem to notice them as he appeared to be distracted in his own thoughts. She kept an eye on him to make sure he would be alright. She didn’t know why she felt a yearning to comfort him; it might have been the storms she saw in those eyes.

Suddenly there was a commotion next to her and a young woman was on the floor. She quickly reached down and offered a hand in assistance. After being assured the woman was alright, she turned her attention back to the crowd and found the Naval officer already looking at her. He nodded to her and she ducked a quick curtsy to him; unsure what compelled her to interact with him.

He returned to who she assumed to be his friend, a militia man whose back was to her. All she could see was his close-cut blond hair and his regimentals. The Naval officer said something and glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. She averted her gaze before seeing who he was talking to and turned back to her mother. Mr. Y/L/N had long left for the card room and Mrs. Y/L/N tried to tell Y/N about how she just saw Mr. and Mrs. Bertram and their daughter.

She forced herself to pay attention to the conversation at hand once more, though some piece of her remained with the bewitching officer.

Her mother was soon distracted from discussing Miss Bertram’s dress by a familiar face approaching them.

"Captain Rogers!" Her mother exclaimed, curtseying as he bowed. "Why, we haven't seen you since the regiment left for Meryton!"

"Well, Mrs. (Y/L/N), the regiment has returned, and at the height of the season too! Did you know that Mr. Knightly and his family arrived not five minutes ago, and we should be expecting Colonel Brandon’s family as well…”

Lt. Barnes and Y/N looked on in the conversation, occasionally glancing at the other when they thought they were not being observed. Finally, Lt. Barnes politely cleared his throat at his friend.

"Oh, my apologies!" Captain Rogers made a slight bow toward him. "Mrs. Y/L/N, Miss Y/L/N, may I introduce Lieutenant James Barnes, my old school mate. Lt. Barnes, this is Mrs. Y/L/N, who was practically a second mother in my youth, and Miss Y/N Y/L/N just as much of a sister to me.”

The ladies curtsied and Lt. Barnes bowed to the women.

“It’s wonderful to meet both of you, though it is shameful that Captain Rogers here,” he said turning to his friend, “hadn’t told me about you before.” He glanced at Y/N at this remark, who lowered her eyes, but had a hint of a smile.

“I certainly have!” the captain said looking comically aghast. “Do not listen to him, Mrs. Y/L/N, I spoke often and fondly of your family while at school.”

“Not to worry, Captain Rogers, I will only cry a little at being forgotten,” Mrs. Y/L/N feigned dabbing at tears. “You had more important things to focus on, like getting into trouble at school, or so I’ve heard.”

“Me, never! A bit of mischief is all.”

“Come now, Captain,” Lt. Barnes said, “I had to get you out of more than one scuffle as I recall.”

“I was only 10! After you enlisted in the Navy, though I did have to rethink my opponents.”

“Who knows how you would have ended up if you hadn’t!” Lt. Barnes said, wagging his finger at his friend as if he was still a school boy. Y/N tried to stifle a laugh when she imagined the bickering the two got into as children. Lt. Barnes, however, heard the small noise and smiled at her.

“And what kinds of mischief did you incur as a little Miss Y/L/N?”

She scoffed slightly at the accusation, “I was nothing but well-behaved I’ll have you know, Lieutenant!”

“Oh, come now, my dear,” her mother interjected. “Why I remember one time you convinced the poor captain here that if he stared long enough at the bark of a tree in the center of town, he could see the outline of a grand ship!”

Y/N blanched, “Mother!”

Lt. Barnes let out a barking laugh which turned into harsh false coughs upon seeing his friend’s warning glare.

“Ahem, yes, well it seems we are all guilty of some infractions of propriety in our youth.” He leaned toward Y/N as if it were a great secret. “I once tricked the captain into thinking it was good luck if he caught up to a fleeing cat and gave it goat’s milk.”

Captain Rogers groaned at the memory.

“I ended up with hoof-shaped bruises, scratches on my hands, and tears in my new clothes. My mother was furious with me!”

Y/N could not suppress her laughter this time, and Lt. Barnes beamed at the sound.

The captain looked between the two, as did her mother. Both arched their brows and then glanced at each other. Captain Rogers cleared his throat and everyone turned to him.

“Well, if we’re done poking fun at my childhood,” he said, “I believe I saw Miss Carter earlier and I must greet her and her cousin. Mrs. Y/L/N, Miss Y/L/N.”

As he departed, Lt. Barnes was left in the company of the women and a silence fell among them. Mrs. Y/L/N said that she believed she saw an old acquaintance too and would like to greet them, but didn’t say who it was. Y/N was about to offer to come with her, but Lt. Barnes interjected.

“Well, Mrs. Y/L/N, if you would not mind,” he said glancing at Y/N, “I would like to ask Miss Y/L/N if she is free for the next dance.”

Y/N, shocked into silence, didn’t say anything at first until her mother not-so-discreetly nudged her arm and she came to her senses.

“I’d be delighted, Lt. Barnes.”

He smiled and offered his hand to lead her to the line of couples preparing to dance.

With the first few notes he bowed and she dipped low in a curtsy, glancing up as she rose and noticing he was looking at her. He smiled as the dance began at the top of the set, where her attention shifted to a few couples away. Y/N watched with a keen eye and smiled as she recognized the figures.

"This is one of my favorites, Lt. Barnes," she said, trying to keep her poise as the dance progressed toward them.

"And why would that be, Miss Y/L/N? Is it the figure when the lady leads through, allowing your figure to appear even more to the greatest advantage? Or perhaps is it the proximity to your partner leading the line of four down the hall?"

She looked at him in amusement for such a speech, especially his barely hidden compliment of her figure. She decided then to risk impropriety and make such a compliment herself.

"No sir, I enjoy this dance as it allows one to test the talents of one's partner," she said, noticing the dance was about to approach them. She had to act fast. "But I must agree with you, sir, that it puts both parties of the couple in a fine light."

When the tune looped again, they reached for each other with their right hands and started to turn. She could feel his warm hand lightly gripping hers through his glove, the strength hidden by long fingers. All too quickly they had to let go, but turned back by the left hand.

As they turned, she looked into his eyes, the irises matching the stormy seas he has sailed for many years, though she didn’t know what troubled him.

"When did you first join the Navy, Lt. Barnes? Were you a small gunner boy running about the deck like a monkey?"

"I was a young gentleman, only about 12, but I learned quickly," he said, seeming to shake off his distraction and remember something funny as they crossed by each other.

"Something other than the dance amusing you Lieutenant?"

He smiled again, as he walked in front of him back to her side and he to his.

"No, I was just thinking of someone you remind me of from when I first joined."

They crossed again and met in the middle of a line, leading down the hall. As they advanced and retreated she gave him a playful glare out of the corner of her eye.

"No one too roguish I hope?"

"No, no, not at all. A most principled fellow, but imaginative," he said as they crossed up and met in their progressed place, starting the dance again.

"Imaginative? You think such of me, Lt. Barnes?"

"Well the second question you asked of me was if I ran about like a monkey! I'm sure you pictured a mop-haired young lad climbing where he shouldn't and getting into trouble!"

"Well knowing Captain Rogers, and knowing that you're friends with him, it wouldn't surprise me in the least if you had a similar penchant for mischief at that age."

She could swear that he smirked at her comment, but the dance required them to turn away from each other at the last second, so she couldn't be quite sure.

"No, actually, it was your dear friend who caused the most mischief. I came to his rescue many times."

Y/N giggled and Lt. Barnes thought it was the sweetest sound he has ever heard.

"Now that I don't doubt at all. He once managed to get one of my family's poor chickens stuck in a tree. It took hours to coax it down. Clearly from your story earlier, he has a way with animals."

He laughed heartily, earning a few glances from the couples around them and making him duck his head bashfully as they casted to place.

Y/N smiled at the now easy-going man and the dance continued for the better part of 15 minutes. They discussed more about his career and found they had a common enjoyment of novels.

As the tune ended, they both honored each other again and prepared for the next piece of their set, which turned out to be his favorite, The Physical Snob. As this particular dance didn't allow for easy conversation due to the fast movements, he instead enjoyed how energetic Y/N was with her dancing and watched her skip around with the other ladies.

They continued to talk at the bottom of the set while waiting to rejoin. After the tune ended, they gave their bow and curtsy and would have continued together, however propriety required that the other be shared among the eligible dancers in the room.

He attempted to come back to Y/N for another two dances later in the evening, however she was already requested by Captain Rogers, who gave his friend an apologetic look before starting to lead the young woman to the sets.

Lt. Barnes leaned down close to her ear before she followed and in a whisper asked if she would be so kind as to save the next two for him. She blushed and with a coy smile said that she would.

The evening ended with the Boulanger, danced into the early hours of the morning with the sun rising above the grove. As the guests started lining up to bid their hosts goodnight, Lt. Barnes and Captain Rogers stood beside Y/N, her mother, and her father once more.

"My dear Captain Rogers," Mrs. Y/L/N started, "we will have to have you for a family dinner, at least three courses!"

The Captain bowed to her, stating that he would be honored to join the Y/L/N family for dinner, while his friend’s gaze caught Y/N's out of the corner of his eye and she saw that barely hidden smirk again.

As her mother and father gushed over the ball with the Wentworths, Captain Rogers made himself scarce as to allow his two friends time to bid their farewells for the evening, knowing there was a spark of something in their meeting.

"I hope your family has a safe trip home, Miss Y/L/N."

"Thank you, and you're staying with Captain Rogers, are you not? I hope you both arrive swiftly and safely as well, though he does only live a short trip away. Not that something couldn’t happen in such a short time, but it’s not likely, is it? Oh, I don’t mean to tempt fate by saying it’s unlikely…"

He grinned at her rambling and could tell she would have continued if the Wentworths hadn't rescued her with the expectation to say goodnight.

As the family and friends made their way outside, Mrs. Y/L/N and Captain Rogers hung back a bit and made tentative plans for a dinner, their hushed voices would have hinted at some conspiracy if Y/N had noticed.

Lt. Barnes bid the Y/L/Ns goodnight and offered his hand to assist Y/N into their coach. She gladly accepted and they both felt that same connection as when they first danced earlier that evening.

"Goodnight, Miss Y/L/N."

"Goodnight, Lt. Barnes."

Their eyes stayed connected as the door closed and the coach started to ramble down the path. He continued to stare after the coach until it was out of view before sighing and turning back. His friend stood there, arms crossed and a smirk on his face.

"It seems you are quite smitten with her, Lieutenant."

Lt. Barnes straightened his back and looked his friend in the eye, but then blushed and his bravado was all but gone.

"When do you think I can see her again?"

Captain Rogers laughed and put an arm around his friend, telling him in a soft voice what the sneaky captain and Mrs. Y/L/N discussed. Lt. Barnes's eyes bulged with the information and finally he chuckled and looked back to where her coach had disappeared.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N finally turned back to facing forward in the coach, sighing silently over the loss of Lt. Barnes's company. Her mother noticed this and a flash of a smirk went across her face before she composed herself.

"Well that was a lovely evening, wasn't it, Mr. Y/L/N?"

"Yes," he said, "excellent games of cards, good food and drink, better company, a brilliant evening indeed."

Her mother took this opportunity to catch Y/N's eye.

"Well, my child, what did you think of the ball and its company?" she said arching a brow.

Y/N felt heat in her cheeks again, but controlled her smile.

"Yes, mother, it was a wonderful ball. I will have to write Mrs. Wentworth first thing in the morning to thank her for the invitation."

"And it was so nice seeing Captain Rogers again, and all grown up and in the militia now! Oh, and what was his friend's name... It's on the tip of my tongue..."

Y/N knew what her mother was doing, but decided to play along.

"Lt. Barnes."

"Yes! That was it. A pleasant enough fellow, and quite handsome too. You danced with him, did you not, Y/N? Twice if I remember correctly."

"Yes, mother."

"How was his company during those dances?" Her mother's eye sparkled with mischief as her daughter averted her eyes.

"Like you said, he was quite pleasant. I would not mind seeing him again."

"That's good to hear child, because he and Captain Rogers are joining us later this week for dinner. The captain and I have already set it up, and goodness knows how late that could run. It'd be a shame if they might just have to stay for the evening and enjoy a walk around the gardens the next morning."

Y/N, shocked by the revelation and her mother's audacious planning, could not speak for a moment, but moved her mouth in an attempt. She finally schooled her features and smiled knowingly.

"Yes mother, that would be quite dreadful, but I'm sure we'll make it through somehow."

Her mother turned back to her father and Y/N looked back out the window.

'Dancing is a certain step toward falling in love, indeed,' she thought to herself as the sun rose over the woods of their home.

[jamestrmtx]

The Bebop Blues - [Animal Crossing | Tom Nook x Reader]

[Gender-Neutral Reader | Slow Burn + Tragicomedy]

Summary:

As wonderful as life might be on the island, there's no doubt you both have a past that's worth better kept there.

Nothing good comes from dwelling too much on your regrets, nor does it benefit the progress you've made up until now.

When life gives you lemons, drown them in sugary water and make lemonade.

Chapter One | And They Were Business Partners

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Lights grow dim, an instrumental starts to play, and conversations lower to murmurs as he steps on the stage. His gaze, always droopy, appears far more lidded now. His chest rises and falls at slow intervals, almost matching with the bluesy beat of the song. He grabs the microphone and brings it close to his face, right before it can bump with his snout. Then, he closes his eyes and begins, voice not once faltering as he recites each line with ease. It's hard not to feel awe with how different he seems while singing, though you brush that off to focus more on him. Regardless of his good odds towards success, his knowledge in business, and his penchant for progress, the man was meek with matters beyond those. Still, you try not to judge based solely on that. Not only is it one of the most impolite ways to establish a perspective on someone, but you don't want to create a strict nor one-dimensional view of him in your mind -- and even less, now that you've known him for so long.

The melodies that follow when he ends his song become a blur as you contemplate his choice of music.

You'd heard him mention it being his favourite a long, long time ago -- back when the island had only just managed to have an upgraded Resident Services building and back when there were only two other villagers living here besides you. It's almost half a year after that you're able to hear him sing so frequent and freely, and it leaves you to wonder over what a successful man like him could be troubled with. The both of you were the main, key people responsible for allowing the island to thrive as much as it had to this day, and -- every occasion where he appeared to be in a tight spot -- he relied on you without fear over making himself appear weak or incapable.

So if the island was doing well under his care and he had you around for whenever stuff got too complicated for him alone, then what was he feeling down about?

Or was that song simply one he liked for its melody, and nothing more?

But if so, why did he seem so different when singing it -- far more melancholic in comparison to his usual self? 

Either way, you have little time to think about that now -- with the sound of him calling your name from afar. You turn to him and bite back a smile at the sight of him trying to shimmy past the growing crowd. In spite of the sudden chaos, he meets your gaze and gestures for you to follow him off to a less crowded area, farther away from those lining up to sing their heart out for what's left of the night. 

His directions lead you to the beach, though the chilly air sends you backtracking in your steps, avoiding the water at all costs; it's about twice as icy as the wind, and the few, stray droplets from each wave reach your face, making you stay back like a cat would do when confronted with a spray bottle.

As often as you enjoyed swimming and doing pretty much a bit of everything around the island, you're not feeling up to it presently. The night's far too cold and dark, and -- though it doesn't snow on the island -- it's more than clear winter's here. You search through your inventory for some warmer, cozier clothing, yet you realize you've nothing but your tools and swimsuit with you. All other items had been stored away early this morning, in order to carry all the materials necessary for your next big project. Had you known karaoke night would last this long and had you known more stuff would be involved after it, you would've prepared yourself accordingly.

"I'm afraid I don't have a coat with me, but…" 

Nook approaches your side and stands right beside you, almost brushing shoulders in the process. 

"We can stay like this for a moment, if you don't mind." He then excuses himself to retrieve something from his pockets, yet he stays close to you while he does that. When he finds what he's looking for, you see it's a song, but -- unlike Slider's disks -- his has no album cover, title, or any of that sort; only your name can be seen scribbled on it at a first glance. "This…" he mutters, trailing off in his words. "This is for you, (Y/N)." Nook offers it to you and takes his gaze elsewhere once you have the disk secure in your hold. He says nothing else, and -- instead -- waits, though all while simultaneously pretending not to.

When you flip it over, you see it's one of your top three favourite tracks: K.K. Metal, but sung by him.

...Yeah.

Not exactly what you'd expect a mellow guy like him to be capable of singing, yet a persistent curiosity helps you imagine him trying to match his voice and attitude with the wild beat and quick pace of the song.

You thank him, and -- being the small villager that you are -- stand on your tiptoes and offer him a kiss on the cheek.

The man takes a few steps back and keeps his hand pressed right against the spot you've kissed. Bright pink spots his cheeks, but it's not quite like the embarrassed reaction a villager taught you when you just discovered how to display emotions. Rather, he seems to have transcended beyond the realms of the game's possibilities, just enough for a new emotion to be unlocked. You mimic the expression out of pure custom and end up feeling as if you've crammed an entire college textbook into your mind -- likely due to you already having all emotion slots occupied.

Nonetheless, you huff out a breath and fight through the headache; then, you look back at Nook, who's frozen in that same, shocked state.  

Now imagine a hamster when it hears something: ears perked, eyes wide, body still and straight, standing on two legs and all that -- but blushing, as well.

That's the emotion he's displaying to you right now.

"Are you okay?" you ask, placing a hand on his shoulder and getting him to look at you. "Do you… Do you need me to call a doctor?"

It takes him a minute, but he eventually snaps out of it.

"It's quite alright," he says, shaking his head. "But… May I, by any chance, return your kiss?"

Though his word choice goes beyond awkward and odd, you smile and nod, replying with, "Sure -- Now, c'mere!"

You tug him by his shirt's collar, stand on your tiptoes again, and bring him closer to you, allowing for him to kiss you back, something proven to be difficult with how long his snout is. Still, he persists and presses a quick one to your cheek. It goes a similar way as to when people wearing eyeglasses try to do the same thing. It's an endearing act from his part regardless, prompting you to tug him in for a hug.

"Happy one-year anniversary, Tom," you say, words murmured. "I'm glad to have met you." A pause follows, though you soon continue with, "It's not everyday people get to have landlords like you -- with no rent deadlines, and… no threats of being kicked out whatsoever, y'know?"

Nook chuckles and replies with, "Happy one-year anniversary, (Y/N)." He then takes a steady breath and lets it out after. "You claim that, and yet you've paid every single debt so far."

"What can I say?" You grin and direct a playful wink at him. "We make great business partners, don't we?"

His ears droop, as does his tail and gaze; it's an abrupt change when being compared to the mood he was in since you both finished with karaoke night. The man seems disappointed, yet you don't think much of it. If something was wrong and he was attempting to hide it, you needed to find a more subtle way to approach him and try to get him to open up more with you.

"...Yes." A sigh leaves him, though it's barely audible and could just as easily be confused with the soft winds of the beach. "Truly so."

Wanting to cheer him up, you settle down on the sand, smile, and extend your hand out to him.

It's cold, but having him nearby helps you with fighting that off. He takes your hand and stays waiting until you pull him to sit next to you. "What's troubling you, Tom?" you ask, brow furrowing. "You know I'm here for you." Your eyes scan his face, looking for anything out of the ordinary in hopes of gaining a hint without having to wait for him to say something.

His eyes squint into a gentle smile, yet the words that follow contrast with it. "I'm afraid this isn't…" Nook hesitates. "This isn't something you can help me with." He looks away for a split second, distracted by a moth fluttering next to a lamppost, who each time gets closer and closer to it. "But even so… Thank you for your concern," he adds, grabbing your hand again and squeezing it tight.

"Of course." You squeeze his back and return his smile. "Anytime, old friend!"

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[jinnyu]

Number 51 with Bede and a male/enby reader? :O! I rarely find anyone who's willing to write for non female coded readers so im really glad I found your blog!

Used artwork credit here

A/N: i got the name of the prompt wrong but we dont speak of that— ANYWHO, im glad i could get the chance to write this for you then, anon! Yeah i rarely came across blogs that are gender neutral about their imagines too :/ hopefully you'll enjoy this though!

(7,915 Word Count!)

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Bede wasn't quite the type to show his concern over others, even when he got close to you and developed feelings for you. He's not used to express his emotions other than being cocky and looking down upon others. But this time, it was different.

You promised him that you'll help him out for the day at his gym, considering its the time where numerous of challengers comes barging in the stadium, asking for the badge that'll get them to the next gym leader. Bede didn't mind them, he never did. It was just that some of them were starting to get to his nerves; challengers bringing their toxitricity to the stadium and using sound based moves, blaring right in his ears— oh for Arceus's sake, let the battle end already, the poor boy's ears are becoming somewhat sensitive if they kept doing that repeatedly.

That being said, he waited and waited for you to come, but eventually, you never did. He pondered over what happened to that awfully irritating (yet lovable) rival of his as he walked out of his gym, telling his assistants to close it for the day and inform the challengers to screw off. He got better things to do than to listen to those damned pokemon singing and spatting poison out of their mouth, hurting his little fairy friends.

"Oh whats with you today" The white haired boy murmured under his breath, looking at his rotom phone and deciding to call you. Sure he has thought of the many possibilities of you being busy due to your new Champion of Galar title, but never even once you bailed him like this— or so he thought.

A heavy string of huffing was heard on the other side of the phone, which makes Bede rise his eyebrow and question about what in Galar are you doing at the moment. His mouth stayed shut while waiting for you to ramble out your explanation, well, an explanation he deserves to know.

Why you ask? Because beneath that smug exterior of his, he's deeply concerned when it comes to you. Tell him a fake information that you've been defeated by some random kid and he'll immediately abandon his gym, looking all pissed and irritated as he stomp his way out of the place. Oh what he wouldn't do just to see your smile.

Though, would he admit that? No, even in the name of Arceus, he wont.

Then, finally you answered with voice indicating that you're slightly tired, "Oh, uh, B-Bede!!" You exclaimed, trying to sound as alright as you could. He could hear you dusting your clothes as you speak, Cinderace in the background chirping with other pokemon playing around the area. Oh boy, you have a lot of explaining to do.

The white haired boy tapped his foot against the ground , waiting for you to finish your sentence. He also asked his Galarian Rapidash to track your scent down, and lead him to you, in the most quickest way possible. You're probably having trouble with your pokemon again, or getting surrounded by your fans, one of the two.

Still, its most likely you're experiencing the first scenario, looking at how you're more active in the wild area rather than in cities. "Enough said, im going where you are right now," Bede said in a stern tone, making your eyes widen a tad bit. You didn't even get the chance to explain to him! You only greeted him and yet he's going to visit where you are right now? Holy Suicune, you're a mess.

"Stay there, dont move"

A sigh slipped past your lips as Bede hung up. Better get going and make yourself somewhat decent then. You were chasing a Galarian Zapdos, one of the legendary bird trio and it didn't go well. The lightning avian clearly lived up to its name by having a lightning speed under it's wings, which made you tumble down your bike a few times while trying to get close to the said legendary pokemon.

It's worth it though, now Zapdos is right infront of you with a soothe bell tied loosely around it's neck, lowering it's head down waiting for you to give it affection. Its cute really, and you wondered if Bede will like this newly captured pokemon of yours. On the other hand, he might not like the scratches you got from falling off your bike, and tripping over baby pokemons— no worries, no pokemon were harmed during this process of capturing Zapdos.

Of course it hurts when you tried to patch your wounds up, some of it were caused by the legendary electric bird itself as you were trying your best not to harm the said pokemon in the process of capturing it. Zapdos did express concern over you when it saw you slightly in a pinch trying to capture it though, and it tried to make you feel better by occassional nuzzling against you, sparking electricity in your hair.

Its never a dull moment in the wild area, Really.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Half an hour passed and your said knight in shining armo— i mean Bede- Bede finally arrived with his Galarian Rapidash.

His eyes widened the moment he saw you visibly being a mess, not minding about the legendary pokemon thats taking a seat beside you as an act of cheering you up. He looks irritated, annoyed and slightly pissed when he saw you not taking care of yourself properly— you never did, you're careless, the wounds will heal anyways and your pokemon will help it heal, thats why you didn't mind it much.

The fairy type gym leader immediately makes his way to you as his Rapidash follows close behind him, incase he needed assistance.

"You...What happened?"

Bede lifted your left arm up as you faced him while he was examining your wounds. You stayed quiet until he looks up at you again, Violet eyes locking with yours for a brief moment.

You didn't answer his question and you simply gestured at the legendary bird pokemon beside you, no other explanation can be better that that anyways, and you're not in the mood to waste your energy by talking too much.

Bede blinked a few times as he finally recognized that you have captured a Galarian Zapdos, the Galarian Zapdos that's said to rule over thunderstorms and making a nest between the electrifying clouds right before a storm starts. Basically the Zeus of Galar, if you will. He was quite amused to say the least, though he didn't expect less from the Champion, but risking your life just to capture a legendary? Yup, thats his rival alright, you and and that reckless stubborn head of yours, not to mention you're often oblivious to Bede's acts of care and affection, resulting in the white haired boy blushing intensely.

A sigh slipped past Bede's lips as he rubbed a potion over your wound, followed by a hiss of pain from your side. You wanted to yank your hand off his hold, "Bede, its alright, i can take care of myself" you muttered as you watched the male infront of you carefully spreading the healing liquid over your wounds, trying his best not to hurt you by doing so.

His Violet eyes looked up at you, then looked back down on your wound, not caring about your complaints.

"Let me take care of you," He said as he was preventing the subtle blush from slowly dusting his milky white cheeks; his fingers that were gently massaging that one specific area on your arm stopped before he checked for your other arm- which, you obliged and gave him your other arm to inspect without any hesitation.

What surprised you the most is that he muttered out those six specific words. The words that you thought would never leave past his lips whatsoever, and yet here you are sitting on a giant rock with him treating your wounds from before as he insisted on taking care of you.

Why does he care so much?

"Bede i said—" before you could continue his sentence, his grip on your arm suddenly tightened by a bit, afraid of you yanking your arm off.

"I want to take care of you." the tone he was using was so sweet, so kind and sincere as if its not Bede who said that; it was slightly shaky too, probably caused by him gradually becoming even more flustered by his honest feelings. This only made you smile warmly, seeing how well Bede is taking care of you— you just remembered that you two are supposed to be in the Fairy Type gym by now, helping the said gym leader with handling the oncoming bundles of challengers.

You, being the oblivious Champion that you are, laughed softly and nudged your cheek against his in an affectionately way while saying a light-hearted thank you along the way. You let the boy take care of you and your wounds as Zapdos stayed quiet by your side, observing the two of you and your actions. You're completely calm and amazed by Bede's knowledge when it comes to potions and healing stuff. Maybe you should learn a few things from him after this then.

Bede on the other hand was a complete mess. Oh how the tables have turned. Your little action of nuzzling against his cheek made him turn beet red; various shades of red covering his cheeks and spreading towards his ears. He avoided any eye contact with you, he knew better than to say anything and embarrass himself even more on the spot, so he stayed quiet, and let you do your silly little affectionate actions. He enjoyed it anyways— not that he'd admit it.

"D-dont do that so sudden next time."

He managed to croak out, voice slightly different from before caused by the amount of blood rushing to his face and ears, not to mention his heart thumping loudly in his chest. Arceus- this feeling is so sickeningly lovely, he hated it, and yet he also loved it. You replied with a soft 'Mhm' before he continues to treat your wounds.

Oh its never a dull moment with you.

[juleswolverton-hyde]

Dream Ashes (Yoongi x Reader)

Genre: Smut, Angst, FwB AU, HYYH AU

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Warnings: Allusions to self-harm, smoking, drinking and domestic abuse, toxic relationships, unrequited love, Top!/Dom!Yoongi, unprotected sex (ALWAYS do it safely, lads and lasses), (semi-)public sex (if sex on a rooftop counts), swearing/cussing

Summary: Not every night under each roof is pleasant, filled with arguments and the broken dreams of aspiring artists held back by parents either having no faith in their child’s talent or, if they acknowledge it at all, in a future pursuing a dream. A mixture of the two continues to kill the aspirations of the black sheep of the Min family, a delinquent deemed a pyromaniac by the ignorant eyes that solely know how to shallowly judge.

But there is a guardian angel with love who bears his burden gladly on lonely nights.

Even if it comes at the cost of her own heart.

Masterlist

Not every night under each roof is pleasant, filled with arguments and the broken dreams of aspiring artists held back by parents either having no faith in their child’s talent or, if they acknowledge it at all, in a future pursuing a dream. A mixture of the two continues to kill the aspirations of the black sheep of the Min family, a delinquent deemed a pyromaniac by the ignorant eyes that solely know how to shallowly judge. However, the open-minded individuals who can see beneath the tough exterior will be met by a musical genius who is forced time and again to give up the sole reason to live.

Music.

The piano.

‘I don’t have a dream. Besides, what’s the point in having one?’ Those words have become a steady statement to make whenever the conversation turns to what can be done after leaving behind six good friends and dropping out of high school. Whether any help is needed, in any regard, because a girl ran away from home herself is more than knowledgeable in how hard it can be to survive without anything to fall back on.

Though eventually a safe haven was offered freely by the actual leader of our little band of troublemakers guarded by a mistress of lies, another runaway living in a train yard outside of town. 

Withal, tonight a new worrying addition is spoken after a habitual check-up text sent from Joon’s refurbished container after patching up Taehyung’s latest wounds inflicted by a raging drunk of a worthless father. The boy with the curious square smile stubbornly continues to hide the true cause of the physical and mental pain despite his fellow graffiti artist having hinted multiple times at wanting him to open up about the issue. Notwithstanding, it would seem the real cause of the harm will only be entrusted to the boys' confidante, the guardian angel helping tattooed aqua locks keep the rabble in line. 

For as far as that is possible. 

‘They take everything from the inside and throw it away.’

‘Who is they?’ Throat constricted by concern at this new detail, fingers stop combing through caramel locks finally fallen asleep after grunting through the medicinal care while precariously avoiding making eye contact with Monie. 

‘Everybody.’

‘I don’t, I would never. Neither would Jungkook, Jimin, Taehyung, Hoseok, Namjoon and Seokjin.’

‘Bullshit.’

‘No, it’s not!’ No response, the last text remaining to be noted as read. ‘Yoongi? 

‘Yoongi, answer me! You’re not gonna do anything stupid, you hear me?

‘Yoongi, please!’

Nothing.

Nothing at all.

‘Oh God.’ The exclamation comes out on a short breath, panic rapidly overtaking as thoughts refer to the past.

‘What?’ Namjoon looks up from designing a new piece of art to place somewhere on a bare city wall, an eyebrow curiously cocked.

‘I- I need to go.’ Gently, Tae is laid down on the mattress. Futilely, the unconscious boy tries to wrap arms around the upper legs to pin them where they are before moving away. They have to, because time has become precariously precious again. Hence, all that the sleeper gets is a quick platonic peck on the forehead. ‘Right now.’

‘What’s going on?’ The leader notices the distress, turning halfway on the worn seat and about to get up.

‘It’s Yoongi. He’s not responding anymore and I think I know why.’

Shredded paper, beautiful notes turned awry thanks to disregard by the public, compositions torn apart to be hauled through a shredder or be burned in the next fire leading to an arrest.

Scarlet.

Glistening metal. 

More silver lines added to the ever-expanding canvas on pale thin limbs.

‘Honestly, why doesn’t he just come here? We’ve both said multiple times he should.’ Honey digits remove the simple beanie to run through blue short strands, defeated in the wager as to why the pianist remains on the flight instead of retreating to the home we have created. 

Regardless of the severity weighing heavily on shoulders moving towards the door, a sympathetic smile can be managed to put Joon at least somewhat at ease. One person carrying the burden of Time is more than enough and if someone should be to blame for being too late, it should be the guardian angel. ‘Because he can’t see the point, the good it’ll do him. He doesn’t know he has a home.’

It should be me.

‘He’d rather see his dream burn than move in with us.’ A mutual deep sigh erases the only sign of comfort that can be given at the moment as a hand reaches towards the latch. ‘One of these days I’ll drag him here myself and just lock him in. It’ll be full house, but I’m sure we could figure something out.’

‘Good luck with that, Monie. I’d help, but I value my life. He’s a tiger. One that’s hopefully unharmed by the time I reach him.’ Because, once more, it are solely the black wings engraved into the back which know the truth while the rising bird is kept in the dark regardless of begging in silence for the last sliver of complete trust even telling of hardships they do not know about. ‘I’ll see you later.’

Gritting gravel surrounding neglected railways beneath open twilight gradually transforms into asphalt broken up by holes in the districts ruled by crime and smooth steady ways in good neighbourhoods forming the residence area of families of which the children will either become something akin to the grandness of a doctor or a nine-to-five, if not worse, office worker. And it is here the phone put into the pocket of the denim jacket buzzes, the screen lighting up thanks to a new message that is a blessing and a curse at the same time. ‘Not home. Ran away. Warehouse. Roof.’

‘When did you run?’ The answer might seem fairly obvious were it not for the memory of the first time created melodies were destroyed by the paper shredder and parents furiously yelled at the aspiring producer to actually go back to school and get a proper education.

A good life.

Meant for someone else.

Not for an artist.

These same bordeaux Puma sneakers stormed through the front door and up the stairs after mister Min opened up, about to ask who in their right mind came calling around midnight. Absolutely not giving a damn about the consequences and solely focused on reaching a familiar door hiding ignored hardship. 

Truth be told, none of us ever has.

Because we live.

Young, wild and free.

Or so we will, after all of us have escaped the judgmental cage created by a society looking down on creative souls trying to make a change. To leave a worthy legacy meant for generations to look back on and learn from. 

After feathers break free from the egg. 

But more than a single care was given upon warily approaching the figure in the secret studio least of all serving its original purpose of a bedroom, crawled away from the door to hide in the corner while clutching anxiously at freshly bleeding cuts. The knife was put aside, undeniably used and cruelly lying on the ground beside us.

Instead of directly speaking, we merely sat across from each other in a heavy hush wherein confidence was regained by calmly waiting for dark eyes to make contact. Which they eventually did, trembling bloody palms removing the white headphones given as a collective birthday present together with Joon and Hobi. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘For what?’ Regardless of knowing what was meant, locks nevertheless tilted to the side in feigned wonder because any direct reference to the difficult situation would lock the oppressed musician up immediately.

And invite the cruel blade upon leaving. 

‘For being so fucking worthless. For making you come all the way here, just to see this good-for-nothing criminal.’ Unjust cracks appeared evident in the barely composed raspy voice of salt-streaked tears. Crimson fingertips plucked at baggy clothes concealing the frame that had become ghastly thinner due to the stress placed upon young shoulders forced to see dreams burn over and over again. 

As always, helpless heavy-weighing playfulness was resorted to in the quiet hope of brightening the mood enough to break through the impenetrable walls which are always built when Yoongi is put down. ‘Shut up.’

Colourless irises, the passion sucked out of them until all they knew was how to cry, looked up in a sharp sneer. Or so it wanted to be, but could not due to an inner voice constraining the harshest negativity which turned the expression grave rather than judgemental. ‘It’s true, Y/N. You know it is.’

‘No, it’s not.’

A shift of subject made it more than clear the current topic did no longer serve any purpose, completely disregarding the smeared headphones and fresh cuts. Curiously, it changed to inquire about the well-being of the equally, albeit not to the same degrees, abused boy with whom often arguments were started merely because of being followed. Followed by the one who looked up to him, the rebel who will one day fully make the right decision and flee from beneath this harming roof permanently. ‘How’s Tae?’

A resigned sigh gave into the shift reluctantly, a tiny sliver of gladness spreading warmth throughout the limbs grown cold at the miserable sight and calming a rapidly beating heart unable to not worry about the wounds. ‘Bruised ribs, split lip, a cut on his cheek and an ugly bruise beneath the left eye.’

‘Please tell me he’s crashing at Namjoon’s.’

‘He is, as always. Mended for as far as possible and asleep.’

‘Good.’ Absently, as if drifting off into the forcefully created crumbled world once more, Yoongi nodded while repeating the confirmation under sharp breath. ‘That’s good.’

‘You, on the other hand, aren’t doing so great.’ It could not be helped, the dark carmine droplets staining ashen sweatpants creating hideous murky brown stains could not be ignored. Ugly yet alluring ghosts tempting the eye into being looked at. ‘You could have come to the train yard.’

The subtle suggestion resulted in the habitual denial of all help, any former softness sharpened like a dagger and flowing from a snarling tongue. ‘I’m fine. Just go.’

‘Where’s the first-aid kit?’ It had always been part of the dynamic, ignoring what the composer said in favour of a better outcome or serve as the company that was wanted but the wish of had never been explicitly stated. Withal, the guardian angel would triumph once more due to the trump card of iron determination, speaking in a tone that would not let anything of the pain due to the confrontation with self-destruction filter through. 

‘Go.’ Sullenness preceded, as per habit, the fierceness of the tiger beneath the skin. Stained fingers moulded into fists gripping at oversized clothes, trembling with rage but trying incredibly hard to contain it to not do something to regret in the second after rashness. 

‘Where?’ The characteristic raised sarcastic eyebrow was not appreciated, still only so on very few occasions nowadays. 

‘Just fucking go!’

The lashing out would have chased away any of the other guys, but not the girl merely scoffing at the show both minds knew was nothing except fakery. ‘Have it your way. I’ll look for it myself.’

As expected, it was stored away in the lower compartment of the bathroom sink adjacent to the small bedroom, thus leading to the swift return to a cherry-haired tiger meticulously observing every movement from a safe spot. Withal, without shrinking as if wanting to melt into the scenery. Instead, he stared on in wonder of the help coming to the rescue of both a friend and a precious bond.

‘Give me your arm.’ No response at first, even at the beckoning hand any other might mistake for being impatient yet was all but that. It was desperate, frightened to death by the flowing carmine. ‘Yoongi, arm.’

Despite not stating it outright, the mere act of putting it in the cross-legged lap calmly without grumbling said more than words could at the moment. Henceforth, a tense though comfortable hush descended while cleaning the wounds after disinfecting them, checking up on an expression continuously returning to stoicism with every hiss. 

Notwithstanding, in spite of missing the change betraying bodily hurt that by no means outweighed the mental burden of both parties, there was a fascinated warmth in irises drained of life time and again as digits bandaged the visible part of the damage up.

‘There, that’s better.’ Glad hands put down the first-aid kit as the last freshly carved scar had been concealed by ivory linen, sighing in calming relief. All in all, it did not take long to patch the musician up but the pressure of time flowing away made the instance appear longer than it really had. 

‘Why?’ Furrowed brows regarded the first step to physical healing, almost as if uncomprehending of how it would help. Of course, it would not aid mental stability but it did allow for the rescue of a soul who would have gone too soon.

‘Because we’re friends and I won’t let you fall. I’d never let you down.’ Trembling in hesitance, the palm of a barely recovered from the shock voice reached out to a pale cheek, the thumb languid in caressing the denied tears away. ‘You’re an incredible musician, Yoongi. No matter what anyone says or whether you believe me, it’s true. We, the guys and I, think so. No, we know so.’

‘You speak of them as if they’re my friends too.’ Had the genuine broken persona living beneath the skin of the rebel kicked out of school been unknown to the girl sitting across from him on the floor, the end would have happened right then and there. However, the opposite was the truth and thus the sneering tone was disregarded in favour of establishing at least a sliver of conviction of reality.

Something to believe in. 

Something to hold on to. 

‘They are. They disregard the fact you don’t contact them at all because, as I said, they know you’re going to make it big someday. They still continue to support you. None of them has forgotten about you.’ Lips pursed in careful contemplation, calculating the impact of each word which wanted to be said without angering the only temporarily subdued tiger. Eventually, such an argument was formed in good faith. ‘And you haven’t forgotten about them either because you wouldn’t have asked after Tae if you had.’

‘Still, you’re the only one here.’ A pale palm folded perfectly over the one on the salt-streaked cheek, the broken dreamer leaning gratefully into the touch with lashes fluttered shut and a voice as if drifting off into slumber. A blissful place away from cruel reality. Away from here. ‘You’ve always been.’

‘That’s not tr-’ The protest was cut short by an unexpected kiss, lips meeting in soft urgency. A whirlwind of emotions kicked up at the suddenness of the action, Reason and Fancy at war due to never having thought the tiger would do such a thing. 

Nor expect to hear a new level of despair in the whisper temporarily breaking up the kiss, sounding strange as it was caught between genuine clarity and relieved sobbing begging to not be left behind. ‘It is. Only you love me.’

Thus, the truly vicious cycle began of coming to the rescue both mentally and physically only to end up in the sheets to fully calm down. See to it Yoongi can rest easy even while one heart falls deeper and deeper into chaotic love.

It has been for the past two years of denial.

But it cannot mean anything.

It should not.

Because, once it does, it becomes a passion.

A dream to pursue.

And that is forbidden and therefore it will shatter or be burned like music.

Until all there is left are merely ghosts.

The only type of changing the meetings of scared hearts have undergone is a shift in location after the rebel dared to run away again the day Jungkook almost ended it all on the edge of the highest skyscraper.

Barely in time could the youngest of the chaotic band be rescued, the man like an older brother pulling the maknae by the back of an ivory and rose checkered blouse and holding on to the boy until both had regained enough breath after spilling tears of frustrated relief. After all, Yoongi had sworn during the last meeting with the entire group beneath a nightly sparkling spring sky to be a support pillar because he knows what living while feeling useless is like, vouching to do so while Kook rested on his shoulder. Through the high-rising flickering amber flames of the fire pit, the two seemed content at last.

For a little while, everything was okay.

We would be fine.

Would be.

But tonight, on the roof of the abandoned warehouse in the harbour where on the lower floor stands a dusty brown piano, we are not. The damaged knuckles and chafed skin beneath sullen irises tells of barely escaping another arrest after being kicked out a bar again and drunkenly searching for a fight, the scent of cigarettes indicating music has been burned again because the pieces were not good enough.

They never are.

Not to society.

But, to the girl approaching a wild tiger, they are everything.

Though the producer is blind to see it.

‘Yoongi?’ No reaction to the greeting comes as the heavy door to the roof closes and bordeaux Puma sneakers pad with a heavy heart over the asphalt still warm due to the day’s heat. They come to a halt a mere step away from the brooding tiger. ‘You never answered me over text and make me come all the way out here to get a response.’

‘Does it matter?‘ Without so much as a sideways glance, entwined damaged slender fingers maintain a steady melancholic gaze over the dark quiet waters of the harbour. A mocking grin tugs at the corners of the mouth but does not form completely, essentially as joyless as the denied dreamer.

 ‘It does! It fucking does!’

For once, please believe me when I tell you that you’re not nothing.

‘To who, hm?’ At last, colourless irises grace a worried soul with a challenging look but at least attention is pulled enough to actually listen and not simply hear. 

‘To the guys.’ A palm slaps against a rapid beating heart in a constricted chest as lips tremble and a cracking voice rises in volume. ‘To me.’

‘Bullshit.’

‘No, it’s not. We care, Yoongi, all of us.’ The last bit of distance is breached as a hand naturally folds over a frozen shoulder clad in a military green jacket, resting there without being violently shrugged off. 

A sign of listening. 

And thus the argument is pursued on a calmer and more steady yet equally urgent tone. ‘What about Jungkook? You promised to be his supporting pillar. Taehyung is over at Joon’s again, beaten up by his dad and you know it hurts you. Just as much as it hurts us.’ 

Upper arms are enveloped as briefly locked gazes break up, ashen strands hanging low in stubborn ignoring of the guardian angel crouching in front of them. ‘Us, Yoongi. The Bangtan Boys and me. Our family.’

‘I have no family. They were the first to destroy it all.’ Regardless of being unable to see it, lips are undoubtedly pursed in a fight to prevent new tears from falling. Woven digits tremble in barely suppressed crimson nicotine anger, vision blurring with tormenting memories of refusal. 

‘But we build it up together, didn’t we? You know you aren’t-’

‘Shut up.’ An arm lashes out to undo any contact, the impact of the action causing a fall backwards. Nothing but agonizing exhaustion radiates off the snarl on the handsome face that has become loved as more than a mere friend. 

Even while it extorts another for pleasure.

A means to forget.

It means nothing. 

‘I’m tired of speaking. Tired of thinking. We both know where this goes anyway.’ Each sentence is accentuated by a firm demanding kiss sealing off any chance of protest after being roughly helped onto two unsteady feet, the tables turned as it now are the arms of somebody trying to help which are grabbed tightly. 

Held dear and cherished in an incomprehensible manner.

But it is better than nothing. 

‘We can’t keep doing this.’ Had this been pure desire, the shape pressing hotly against the thigh would have been appreciated in a whole different way. Interpreted in a manner not remotely close to the reality of us because it is not sensual wanton craving.

It is pent-up frustration coming to a boiling point.

Fruitless.

A wandering ghost.

A heap of ashes. 

‘Shut up.’ The hands creating an abyss by pushing against a sturdy chest are given other purpose. Nevertheless, the meaning of the distance remains: foolishly to be able to be filled with sincerity. 

One hand is placed on the hip and the other below, simulating a laughable imitation of actual craving as another kiss adds to the poor fancy. ‘Just do what you’re told for once.’

Lips connect once more in saltwater carrying broken wishes and all the dreams that cannot be because of emotions warring with ideals, the correct way of life stained by nicotine and the sharp yet sweet tang of cheap soju. 

Trembling fingers envelop damaged cheeks as slender musically gifted hands tug at the edge of pants, beckoning them to lie down before undoing the belt fastening bleached ripped jeans only to be warmly welcomed again by the palms that only get to hold the face they love in this repeated loveless lovemaking. Knowing the impatience of the tiger, any restrictions to allowing the heated wantonness pressed against the thigh earlier have been removed before wiping away returned tears and lovingly caressing ashen brown locks.

Don’t get your hopes up. It won’t mean anything. It’s just a means of comfort.

Everything is familiar, a piece of the past tainted by crimson and smoke to cling to. 

The warmth spreading throughout as separate souls effortlessly become one, unprotected in wordlessness and thus letting actions say all that tongues cannot. 

The speed of snapping hips, uncaring about pleasure and merely wanting to fuck the pain away. 

The agony of the tug on each tendon keeping the heart inherently belonging to the occasional groan breaking through heavy breaths whispering into the side of the neck. 

The urban scent of cigarettes, ashes and blood.

The possessive iron-like grip on the waist, desperate to be grounded in the moment or simply an anchor into this world while the mind it belongs to tries to flee.

The chase after temporary oblivion together, though one soul remains a step behind to not frighten the other into love.

After all, it has no meaning.

None of this.

It is a ghost we keep.

Preventing us from finding happiness together.

The chance to hear three simple words spill at least once before or after a troubled mind finds brief peace in the arms of the woman he said, no, knows loves him. Nevertheless, Yoongi cannot return the affection.

Cruelly, the hope remains even while lying on the warm concrete, the heat seeping through dishevelled clothes covering the upper part of the body, and embracing the musical genius drifting somewhere in a pleasant ignorant limbo. The same state of being that lashes turned to a beautiful sparkling sky did not reach again and never will during these meetings. Still, it is not minded for this is a more meaningful type of contentment.

Simply lying here among the ashes. 

But it cannot mean anything.

It should not.

Because, once it does, it becomes a passion.

A dream to pursue.

And that is forbidden and therefore it will shatter or be burned like music.

Until all there is left are merely ghosts.

[kamino-ink]

Hireath | Han Jisung

✧  hireath - a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return

✧ Genre: Fantasy!au, fluff, hella angst proceed with tissues

✧ Summary: you and jisung have always been side by side, training dutifully to become knights as to protect your kingdom of mirstone. when the plan to overthrow ylanta’s king and queen involves your skills as knights, you are both put to the test in every way imaginable.

✧ Word Count: 2.2k

✧ Other installments in the series: woojin, chan, hyunjin, changbin, jeongin, minho, felix, seungmin

                                         ✧

han jisung is, simply put, your other half in every way imaginable

it was as if the gods had planned for the two of you to become as inseparable as you are to this day, as you were born at the exact same time on the exact same day - and your houses were right next to each other

not to mention your parents were childhood friends as well

the pair of you grew up side by side, playing in puddles of icky mud and climbing to the very top of the trees in the forest behind your houses, much to your families’ displeasure

due to the high status of both of your families, many expected you to follow in your father’s footsteps and become a renowned aristocrat with jisung one day rising to become an artist known for his pieces around the world

but you and jisung had very, very different plans, since the very beginning

this diverging plan emerged on a stormy afternoon, the two of you had been chasing each other throughout the streets of the bustling city when a sudden ‘boom!’ erupted, nearly sending you both flying into a brick wall

but someone had caught your smaller bodies with quick, cat-like reflexes

that someone was one of the knights in your home kingdom

his armor was stained a stunning blue and white mix of colors, the distinct emblem of the royal family carved into the steel plating

the knight glanced over your shaking bodies once, twice, and then once more before he concluded no external damage had come to either of you

before jisung could open his mouth to ask the knight any questions sure to be running through his active brain, the lanky man had already started to take off towards the town square where the boom had come from, blending in with the plethora of other knights ready to defend their people from harm

that was the day both of you mutually decided that, one day, you both would become the strongest, most dedicated knights in the entire kingdom

the two of you stuck by each other’s sides all the time, even now you stood straight next to one another, clad in the blue and white armor you had come to admire for many years now

while you both were still quite young, no one could doubt how strong you both were and how much you excelled as a duo on the battlefield

while both of you were incredibly strong, jisung was the one who had mastered strategy-making and long-ranged weapons; meanwhile you had mastered the art of guerilla warfare, which was obvious by how muscular your body had become over the years

while jisung was essentially the louder, more rambunctious of the two of you, he had more brains and you held more brawns, even if you were the one who had to convince the boy to not try and slip jelly cubes into one of the general’s drinks while she wasn’t looking

you balanced each other out, it was as simple as that

“I know that you two are confident in your abilities to carry out this mission, but I beg of you - please be careful, if not for me, for the princess.” seungmin, one of the general’s sons pleaded to you and jisung, his usually stoic expression fading into one of worry at the carefree smiles planted onto your lips

“aww, is little seungmin worried about his best friends in the whole wide world?” jisung cooed teasingly to the younger boy while you ruffled his hair, causing the boy to let out a whine of annoyance and affection

“don’t sweat it, the two of us can do this no problem. its just a stealth mission through the mountains across the border, right? we got this.” you try to reassure your close friend, offering him a wide smile to try and lift his spirits

thing is, you were just as worried, if not more, about this particular mission

you and jisung had never tracked across miles of mountains before, and especially not into enemy territory that was growing more and more weary of invasion with each passing day

while the court wizard of ylanta, minho, was doing his best to deter the royal family from suspecting any sort of plan against them, there were still rumors

and rumors were enough for any sort of leader to be on guard more than usual

even though you damn well knew that the two boys you called your best friends, along with the princess now stranded in ylanta for her wedding, could sense your growing weariness, you refused to verbalize your concerns

“i’m sure our darling princess will be happy to see you two again since she’s stuck up there,” seungmin tried to lighten the mood, smiling at the thought of their friend group being able to reunite, “just make sure to stay low, stay hidden - tho-”

“those bastards won’t hesitate to shoot us down, we know, genius.” the blonde beside you finished the statement, patting seungmin’s shoulder reassuringly as he met your worried gaze

“we’ll be fine, don’t worry so much.”

that same night you and jisung had set out on your long journey through mirstone , taking a pair of horses for a majority of the way before you hit the mountain range that was between mirstone and ylanta’s borders

but by the time you reached the bottom of the rocky slopes, you had to bid farewell to your horses, knowing the poor creatures wouldn’t be able to stand the chilly temperatures and dangerous slopes ahead

so you and jisung shrugged on the bags onto your backs, letting out pitiful grunts at the sheer weight of the leather material now weighing your bodies down a bit more than either of you expected

the first stop didn’t turn out to be so bad; you had made a good track so far, walking at least five miles through the spiky range of tall mountains; a feat only you two could accomplish alone

if another squadron had been sent to make the journey along with you both, there was no way you would’ve made it so far, and so quietly

see, only three of the fifteen miles of mountains stretched into mirstone - the rest went on through a subsection of ylanta

so it would be no surprise if you were met with enemy solders at one point or another, hence why sending only two of the best knights was surely the best decision the strategists could’ve made at the time

“you want some of my beef stick?” jisung asked you, watching carefully as you sadly rubbed your belly; you could only bring a certain amount of rations, and for the most part it included little to no real meat, in fear that a wild bear would smell the meal and try to take it from you two

still you snuck in two beef sticks to keep you energized on the first day, as it was the longest part of the journey. you had eaten yours already during the horseback ride, but jisung had proved as smart as ever, choosing to instead eat his beef stick before bed so that he would feel more energized in the morning

“no way, you need to eat all of it - I already ate mine.” you pushed away his kind offering, blushing a crimson red when your stomach decides to let out an ungodly sound akin to a lion’s growl

jisung rolled his eyes and leaned in closer to you, stuffing part of the ration into your mouth before you could protest

“chew, y/n.” he insisted, smirking cockily when you huff and take a bite of his ration, pulling away and continuing to chew on the tough beef with puffed cheeks. “atta girl, that’s my cute little chipmunk~” he cooed teasingly, pursing his lips and pinching your cheeks

you can’t help but feel your cheeks (which were still being pinched) heat up at his gentle yet still teasing touch, the pads of his fingertips warm against your chilly skin

once he pulls away you end up chewing on the beef stick until you finish, then continue to sit close to each other in favor of not freezing to death on your first night in the mountains

jisung digs into his pack for a moment and then pulls out a pair of furry blankets, throwing one over both of your legs and the other over your shoulders before he shimmied underneath them right beside you

“do you remember the time I got stuck in a tree during training?” you ask him suddenly, feeling his lips twitch into a knowing smirk against the side of your head

“I do. you tried to impress one of the visitors from that little town - arbington, I think?” he ponders aloud, but continues after your hum of approval. “yeah, he owns a menagerie or whatever and you thought he was sooo cute~”

“shut up jisung… he was cute.”

“not as cute as me though, duh.”

“obviously.”

“but I was the only one able to come up and bring you down; you refused to accept help from anyone but your best friend.” he giggles

you laugh and roll your eyes, snuggling up closer to him for warmth

and then you both fall asleep, curled up into each other with your legs tangled together under the warmth of the blanket

the next two days were relatively the same; you would walk through the mountains for a few miles, sneak past outposts with ylantian guards, and camp out next to one another

“hey y/n,” jisung speaks after some time of comfortable silence, walking ahead of you by a few inches, but nothing too far, “after this mission - after we win the war...” he trails off, dipping his head down in thought, a strand of his blonde hair swaying in front of his eyes

you tilt your head thoughtfully, mimicking his actions. “what’s wrong, ji?”

he takes a deep, shaky breath, suddenly stopping in his tracks to turn on his heels, now completely facing you

“ji-?”

“y/n, come live with me. somewhere, anywhere - seungmin already agreed to have a talk with the princess once this is all said and done,” he blurts out, his voice wavering, “I - I don’t want to keep doing shit like this, where I could possibly see you die in front of me. I couldn't - I could never live with myself if that happened, chipmunk.” he pleads with you, his gaze flickering all over your stunned expression as he waits for you to speak

“jisung - I... of course i’ll come live with you. I would follow you to the ends of the earth if you asked me to.” you giggle at his expression which now clearly reflects yours merely moments ago

“wait, are you serious?” he breathes out, his lips parting to say more

then an arrow flies through the air, whizzing past your face and piercing the boy in his shoulder

you immediately place your body in front of his as fast as you possibly can, whisking out a pair of war axes from the hoops of your belt. meanwhile the injured boy hisses in pain, but doesn’t pull the arrow out, as he knows too well that you both could potentially be in for a long fight without medical attention - he didn’t want to risk bleeding too much from the wound in his shoulder

then, from the outskirts of the mountains, just out of view, a horde of ylantian solders start to creep from the shadowy crevices, decorated with heavy armor and giant battle axes as well as crossbows

suddenly a flurry of arrows fly at you both, some of them puncturing your lower legs, thighs, and arms

these soldiers weren’t shooting to kill; yet

“the king and queen send their regards - oh, and...” one of the soliders tep forward from his rocky perch, carelessly swinging a silver sword around as he smirked at your bleeding bodies, “before you both die, I figure you might want to know that we have your princess in captivity. she’ll be executed tomorrow at sunrise. terribly sorry.”

you feel your heart drop in your chest, and by the strangled grunt from jisung’s throat, you can tell he is as horrified as you are

“now, let’s see how much the two best knights of mirstone can take before they topple over.”

as the horde of shouting soldiers start to make their way towards you both, clearly already celebrating their victory, you find your hand searching for jisung’s; nearly crying out in relief when it intertwines with yours

“I - I love you squirrel.” you whimper softly, squeezing his hand as another arrow whizzes into your chest

“I love you too, chipmunk.” jisung whispers just loud enough for you to hear, a single tear rolling down his cheek at the endless sight of experienced enemies still hurtling your direction

there was no way to win this fight, and both of you knew that

but you both knew that at least you would die together, fighting until the very end for your country

for your kingdom, mirstone

for your friends, seungmin and the princess

for each other, for jisung, for y/n

and so, still holding hands, you both stood back to back, raising your weapons to your enemies

                                         ✧

[nextchae]

seventeen reaction — finding out they’re going to be a dad

Awkwardly, you held up the plastic stick to the light so you could see better. You had taken nearly fifteen pregnancy tests and they all started off looking nearly negative, but with a faint second line. So after a quick google search you decided to wait a couple of days to take another, which not saying anything to anyone was admittedly one of the hardest things you’d ever done. Luckily you didn’t have to hold anything in anymore because the freshly taken test revealed you were most definitely pregnant. Unfortunately before you had time to do anything, the bathroom door was slung open and stood behind was your husband.

S COUPS

The door had been slung open so violently and unexpectedly you’d accidently let go of the test in your hands, causing it to fall to the bathroom tiles with a soft click. Your husband barely even noticed due to his gushing about this drama you’d accidentally gotten him obsessed with. It took him nearly three minutes of talking before noticing that you were slowly trying to kneel down and pick up the object on the group. What further surprised him was your shriek when he went to give it to you.

“What’s wrong? What even is-“ he cut himself off upon actually taking a look at what was now in his hands, a positive pregnancy test. The male that was known for being good with words suddenly found himself frozen, unable to speak, and instead nearly fell into your arms.

JEONGHAN

“Y/n you won’t believe what just happened to me” Jeonghan started somewhat angrily as he busted into the bathroom where he knew you were. You feigned interest in his story about how the cat knocked into his coffee and pushed it off the table on purpose, all while holding the test awkwardly behind your back.

“You know she probably just wanted some attention” you spoke when he paused for a moment, accidentally moving your hands from behind your back in a gesture. Unfortunately before you could hide the test again Jeonghan had quickly snatched it from your hands. He didn’t say anything for a long while, looking from you to the test and back to you and the test until finally glancing at your stomach for a moment.

“This is- yours?” He asked hesitantly, eyes suddenly glued to the two blatantly obvious lines on it. Before you even had time to answer or so much as nod he had you in a bear hug, his head buried into your shoulder.

JOSHUA

You had been so shocked when the results of the test came back you hadn’t even heard Jisoo’s knocking on the bathroom door and asking if you were alright. After minutes of silence, his mind had immediately went to the absolute worst possibilities resulting in him quickly swinging open the door. It would be hard to tell which one of you were more surprised at each other’s stance, you were again so surprised and in shock you didn’t even bother to hide or shield the test.

“Jagiya, you scared me since you didn’t say anything” he said after a moment, letting out a sigh of relief. Nodding, you quickly decided to show him the test yourself instead of him finding out himself.

“Wait, wha- really?” He would say after a moments shock, excitedly pulling you into his arms about a million times more gentle than normal which you didn’t even know was possible.

JUN

“I have to pee so bad what on earth is taking you so long?” Your husband whined upon basically kicking open the door. Attempting to mask your mixture of many different feelings with apologies to him instead, he easily saw through it.

“What’s up?” Was all he asked, seemingly forgetting about his need to pee as he jumped up to sit on the bathroom counter beside where you stood. Raising an eyebrow at you when you just disregarded his question he easily noticed the object you had hidden behind your back. “So, it wouldn’t have anything to do with what you’re holding behind your back?” He’d say causing your face to immediately turn red and you to slowly show him the test. When you did his face would turn just as red and all sarcastic comments would be knocked from his reach, him instead smiling while pulling you in for a kiss.

HOSHI

Intending on scaring you, Soonyoung burst through the bathroom door as if he was on fire, but it was actually him that ended up scared instead.

“H-hey, what’s that? Is that a, a-a uh...” he stumbled all over his words when he noticed the plastic stick in your hand, his eyes so wide they could’ve easily popped right out of his head. Biting at your lip, you held it out in front of his eyes so he could see the small red plus sign up close. Silence soon filled the room, the only audible sound being his increasingly heavy breathing.

“You’re kidding!” He suddenly exclaimed, his usual opened mouth smile rising to his face. “I can’t believe it!” He continued saying little things about how excited he was until you finally had to stop him.

WONWOO

“Y/n? Have you seen the book I was reading?” Your husband asked upon peeking through the doorway. Instantly grabbing the object and moving it to hide behind your back in a seconds time, you leaned against the counter to block his view of the box for the test as well.

“Yeah, I was reading some of it last night. I think I left it on my nightstand” you spoke, letting out a quiet sigh of relief. Nodding when he asked if you were alright, you just completely melted under his sudden questions and had to show him.

“Are you sure?” He asked, surprisingly calm as he looked at the positive lines. When you nodded a smile rose to his lips and he wrapped his arms around your frame happily.

WOOZI

“What are you doing in there? It’s been like twenty minutes” you heard a familiar voice ask from outside the door, waiting only a few seconds before pushing it open. Seeing as how you still weren’t dressed, a small frown was brought to his lips and he continued on about how you two were supposed to be meeting the rest of the boys in half an hour. Deciding the easier way to get out of his scolding would be to just tell him, since it wasn’t really your fault after all, you quickly lifted the box and test to his eyes. Immediately his words came to a stop, his jaw nearly falling to the floor as well.

“This- this is what you were doing?” He suddenly asked, eyebrows raised as he looked from you to the test and back and forth. Before he even gave you time to answer he had you in his arms, a pretty unusual thing for the male as he wasn’t super touchy feely, but he just couldn’t be like that now.

DK

Little did you know that Seokmin had been growing suspicious over the course of the last month or so. First it was because of you constantly being sick for longer periods of times, and then when he realized it was the week your period typically came he prepared for the usual mood swings and cuddling because of your cramps but that never came either. So, with these suspicions in mind he watched you come home from a quick trip to the nearby convience store and make a beeline for the bathroom after a rather short greeting. He waited until he couldn’t take it any longer, which was actually a record time of about twenty minutes, before actually running through the bathroom door.

His eyes instantly met with that of the test you were holding causing him to let out a scream and grab you extremely tightly still yelling about how he knew it all along and how excited he was. He wouldn’t stop screaming for at least half an hour, then he’d want to call everyone on his contact list and tell them you both were having a baby.

MINGYU

“I am so lonely jagi you don’t even know! All I wanted was cuddles, but then you came and locked yourself in here” he whined the moment he pushed open the door, the tall male leaning against the door frame. He was so oblivious that he didn’t even notice when you quite obviously moved your arm to hide the test behind you. Instead he moved to shorten the distance between you two, desperately wanting to wrap you in a hug. When you took a step back reflexively, he frowned sensing something was wrong.

“What is it?” He asked, grabbing your forearm. When he pulled it back was when he saw what you were clutching, a positive pregnancy test. He would react immediately, screaming and picking you up. After all the excitement, he’d probably cry for a while and then call his mom.

THE8

He thought you were just taking a shower or something, but when you ended up in there for over half an hour was when Minghao began to worry. You hadn’t heard his knock or his rushed worried questions due to your locked gaze on the plus sign that had appeared on the test, so he soon just walked in anyways.

“Why didn’t you answer me?!” He would ask somewhat angrily, feeling his heart start to beat at a normal pace again when he saw your perfectly fine self behind the door. After a quick apology you eagerly showed him the test, a smile beaming from your lips. He would be quite at a loss for words, but he would show his happiness and excitement through the long hug he’d soon give you and the small peppered kisses all over your face.

SEUNGKWAN

“Dinner is ready!” He would screech like a wild animal the moment he busted down the door. The look on his face quickly twisted from pride to worry when he saw the shocked look still locked into your eyes.

“You okay?” He’d rush over to you, a hand instantly rubbing your back before moving his eyes to look at what you were also looking at. Then he was frozen, for nearly a whole minute as too many feelings at once apparently broke him. After snapping out of his stance he’d scream something along the lines of “I’m going to be a dad” before running around like a crazy person around the house.

VERNON

He had actually seen through the plastic bag of groceries the box for a pregnancy test. So like any other soon to be father he’d freak out, but decide to play it cool around you. Until he finally realized what you were doing in the bathroom after half an hour. So after a quick pep talk by his good friend Seungkwan, he was instructed to tear down the door with no warning. Seeing the terrified look on your face from his actions, he’d immediately feel bad, but not for too long because of the huge news you quickly shared with him. Since he was sort of already prepared he’d act mostly rationally and calm, but still extremely excited and immediately starting to tend to your every need.

DINO

This poor boy would be so oblivious, only entering the bathroom because he really really had to pee. Even seeing the white plastic stick you held he just assumed it was some weird female thing and quickly did his business. This was when you realized you could actually still surprise him with the news. So after he came out of the bathroom you surprise attacked him with a hug, whispering in his ear that he was going to be a dad.

“WHATTTT” he’d look at you confused before finally realizing everything extremely late. Laughing at his own naivety, he’d happily press his lips to your telling you about how great of a mother you were going to be and how lucky this child would be.

thanks for requesting bb. requests are open 💓

[bamby0304]

A Special Gift

Summary: With the snow falling outside, Faith and Simon talk in order to pass the time. She tells him of the Christmas’ she’d had before the dead began to rise. She told him how all she wanted was one more Christmas. She was sure it would never happen… but Christmas is a time of miracles.

Pairing: Simon x Reader

A/N: This is my submission for @simons-thirst-squad ‘s Simon’s Advent Calendar Challenge. My prompt was December 11th- Jesus. I haven’t written much Simon before… so I’m really hoping you guys enjoy!!

Word Count: 2,900+

Warnings: A lil’ bit of angst, and then some fluff :):)

Bamby

Christmas. I love Christmas. For as long as I could remember, I’d loved the cheery, merry season. The snow. The presents. The food. The music. The festivities. The family gatherings. The clothes. The decorating. Everything about Christmas was amazing. It was a magical season.

Unfortunately, the end of the world kinda put a sour note through any and all possible and previously celebrated holidays… even my beloved Christmas.

Being one of Negan’s Saviours meant I got a lot of privileges. But as I looked out the window of the truck I was seated in, watching the snow fall to the already white ground below… I knew nothing was going to get me the Christmas I so desperately wanted.

“You okay?”

I looked to my left, to the friendly and familiar face behind the wheel. Simon.

Simon was a peculiar person.

I could honestly say his personality would have intimidated me back in the day. His wide grin could sometimes appear false and an exaggeration of what he was really feeling. Simon was the kind of guy who could be overbearingly friendly, to the point of scaring any potential conversation away. I had no doubt he knew his smile could invoke feelings of fear and discomfort, and I had no doubt that prompted him to grin wider every time.

There were other quirks about him, namely his moustache. I wasn’t particularly a lover of feature pieces on faces, but I couldn’t imagine Simon without the handle bar moustache he’d had on display since the moment I’d met him all those years ago. It wasn’t wild or untamed, it was actually neat and fairly maintained. He never said anything about it, but I had a feeling he took pride in the ‘stache.

To top it all off, he was tall. Sometimes, in moments where his authority took place from his friendly nature, he towered over most- if not all- people. Even when the anger wasn’t aimed my way, he made me feel like a measly mouse looking up at an aggravated giraffe on the edge of violence.

Oh, and let’s not forget about the fact that even though he looked lanky and thin due to his long limbs and tall body, he was actually ripped. I’d been graced with the opportunity to see him shirtless during a rather hot and humid run we’d been sent on months ago. We’d all been given a moment to relax and cool down by a lake we’d come across. But, let’s just say, I did not get to cool down much after the sight of his toned form flexing before my eyes.

Like I said, he’s peculiar. Definitely an interesting character.

But despite my interest in his personality- and my admiration of his glorious body- nothing had happened between. Why? Good question. The years separating us played a part, I suppose.

Ages weren’t really something most people bothered with these days. Time was a measurement that had generally been forgotten and left behind by the majority- but not all- of the population. But I could still tell Simon was older than me. Where I was in my late twenties he was somewhere either close to or in his fifties.

His receding hairline and the shadow of grey hair was a giveaway of his age. The wrinkles that formed when his large and overly friendly smile came into place were another hint. The callouses on his hands told stories of hard work over many years that stretched over a time that lapsed into the years from the days of the world and lives we once knew.

Another reason for the lack of action between us was the fact that Simon had never made a move. He was a friend and had always acted that way.

When I’d been brought in by some Saviours and had been offered the opportunity to join their cause, he’d volunteered to take me under his wings. I’d thought he would have tried something, maybe flirted a little, but all I ever got was nice.

For example, he always let me ride shotgun, instead of making me sit in the back with everyone else. He always made sure there was a seat for me at his table in the dining hall. He always made sure I had plenty of emergency supplies and ammo when we went out on runs. He always made sure everything was working perfectly in my room.

I appreciated this, of course, but I was also aware of the fact that all this meant he was undoubtedly not interested.

“Hey, Earth to Fai.” Simon waved his hand in front of my face, pulling my attention back to him and away from my thoughts.

“Oh, uh… huh?” I asked, forgetting his question.

A smile tugged on his lips, his eyes back on the road. “I asked if you were okay.” He reminded me.

Sighing, I leaned back so I was partially leaning against the back of my chair and the door beside me. “What do you think it’ll take to convince Negan to do something for Christmas?”

His smile faltered for a moment as he contemplated my question. “Christmas? You wanna do something for Christmas?”

“Yeah.” I nodded casually, trying not to seem so eager about the fact he hadn’t shut the question down with a laugh. “Like, maybe we could get a tree and put it down in the factory for everyone. And we could scavenge for some things people could buy to give as presents. And we could have a Christmas dinner made in the main kitchen.” I shrugged. “Something like that.”

“I don’t know…” His smile was nowhere in sight as he said his next words. “The favour won’t be easy.”

That meant two things. One, the favour would be sexual. Or two, the favour would be deadly.

Negan had expressed interest in me before, but I wasn’t the kind of girl that wanted to get mixed up with a guy who has the amount of power he has. Plus, to be honest… he scared the crap out of me.

So, that left option two. Negan had a list of jobs waiting to be done. If someone wanted something special that would cost more points or use valuable resources, they could do one of the jobs for him. But, most of the time, you didn’t come back from wherever he’d sent you.

Letting my head drop back against the window, I sighed once more. “Seriously, all I want is a little bit of Christmas. It’s not like I’m asking for fireworks on New Years of something. Just a tree would be fine.” I mumbled, turning my head so it was still against the glass but so I could also look out at the snow.

The roads were covered. With the lack of movement these days the snow fell freely to the ground, covering everything in its wake. The only bare patches were where the truck in front of us had disturbed the white covered road, but that would all be covered before night falls.

“Why do you want it so much?”

Lifting my head, I looked to Simon again. “Huh?”

“Christmas. Why do you want it so much?” He repeated himself, keeping his eyes on the road ahead.

“I don’t know. Just ‘cause.” I tried to shrug it off, not wanting to tell him the truth. I was supposed to be a big bad Saviour, not a softie.

But he wasn’t buying it. “Come on, seriously. Tell me. I promise I won’t laugh or judge or whatever your worried about.”

Watching him, seeing him focussing on the road ahead, the elbow of his left arm resting on the door as his other arm sat on his knee, his hand stretched out so it could rest on the gear stick, I gathered he was only asking to keep the conversation flowing. He didn’t exactly look interested. He just wanted something to talk about.

“Christmas was a big deal with my family.” I explained. “We were all scattered across the country but we all managed to come together every year. We’d all meet up at the family cabin for a couple of weeks. The cabin was only ever used for holidays and special occasions, but Christmas was when it really came to life.”

“Big family?”

“Yeah.” I laughed lightly, remembering the multitude of cousins I’d had. “Huge family.” The smile stayed on my lips as I reminisced the past holidays. “We did it all. A group of us would go out, chop down a tree and lug it inside. The kids would cover it in decorations… which the adults would fix up later so it didn’t look like an explosion of tinsel.” He chuckled at that.

“But the best part was the family gift we got.” I continued. “Every year my Gran would wrap up these little wooden nativity statues that had been passed down for generations. She’d stick one piece in the tree every day, and whoever found it got to set it on the mantel piece. On Christmas morning the last piece was added to the collection.”

Simon glanced over at me, a little surprised. “Never pictured you as the religious type.”

“Oh, I’m not.” I insisted. “But I am a sucker for family traditions, and that set was gorgeous. Especially the Jesus piece. That was always the last one, and my Gran knew how much I loved it, so she always told me where she’d put it in the tree.” I looked down at my lap, smiling to myself.

The whole set had been beautiful. Each piece sat nicely in the palm of my grown adult hand. They’d been hand crafted and painted. They’d almost looked like they’d been made from clay, they were so detailed.

My smile turned sad. “The last Christmas we’d had my uncle had gotten a little too drunk. It wasn’t odd, really… but it had been the first Christmas after my Gran had passed.” My smile fell completely. “He threw the set into the fire during an emotional breakdown, I left the day after… on Christmas eve.”

The conversation had dropped pretty quickly after I’d told Simon the fate of the nativity figurines. I hadn’t been in much of a talkative mood after that, and I guess my story had taken a depressing enough turn that left him speechless- not that I blamed him, I had well and truly soiled the ride.

A few days had passed since then, and I hadn’t seen much of Simon during that time. We mainly saw each other in passing. He rarely stayed in the dining hall for diner. He was always off doing some kind of work I wasn’t aware of. He didn’t even come down to the common room the Saviours spent their free time in, and he was usually there most nights.

I guess I’d spoiled more than just the car ride…

Asking Negan about Christmas was a no-go. I didn’t even bother.

Simon was right. I’d have to do something I wouldn’t want to do. As much as I wanted to celebrate the season, to bring back a little bit of the joy that had once been in my life, I didn’t want to risk doing something I’d regret or doing something that would get me killed.

Busy working now, I was on guard duty on the factory floor. The roster rotated frequently, so I didn’t spend a lot of my time around the workers like this, which I usually preferred. Sometimes I couldn’t curb my guilt. But today I was grateful. Being in here meant I wasn’t out in the snow.

“Fai.” Laura, a fellow Saviour and- kind of- friend, came over to me. “Boss number two wants to see you.”

“Simon wants to see me?” I gave her a hesitant look. “You sure you got the right person?”

After days of minimal contact and conversation, I highly doubted he wanted to see me.

“You know any other short blonde chick named Faith?” She asked impatiently. “Look, I was just given the order, I don’t ask questions. Simon said he wants you to go see him in his quarters. I’m supposed to stay here and take over your watch. That’s all I know.”

Understanding that my lack of movement was getting on her nerves, I simply gave a simple nod and walked off.

On the way to Simon’s quarters I felt my nerves bubble. I’d only ever been to his place a handful of times, and that had mainly been when I’d had to grab him for an emergency, or when he’d needed help bringing supplies up to his room. Other than that, the place was foreign.

Tugging on the sleeves of my jacket, I looked down at myself to make sure I was presentable. If I had to go to his room then whatever he needed me for was important, and there was no way in hell I was going to show up looking like a slob.

My dark denim jeans were a little dusty but I just brushed that off as I walked down the winding halls. My light grey shirt had a few creases in it, but there was nothing I could do about that except zip my thick and heavy jacket up. I’d thrown on a navy beanie, a pair of dark grey fingerless gloves, and my usual black work boots, which was all fine. Luckily, I’d washed my hair last night, and had decided to leave the waves falling down my back

It was as good as I was gonna get.

Reaching Simon’s door, I took a deep breath and braced myself before lifting my hand to knock lightly on the wood in front of me. A few seconds passed before the door opened just enough so Simon could stand between the door and the frame as he looked down at me.

“Fai!” He beamed, wide smile spread on his face. “Just in time, I was about to start making the cookie dough.”

I raised a confused eyebrow as I looked up at him, my nerves dying down at his absurd words. I had no idea what he was going on about, and I was seriously beginning to wonder if he’d hit his head or something.

“Cookie dough?”

Smile still firmly in place, I pushed the door open the rest of the way, letting to swing to the other side until it hit the wall. Now I could see into his apartment, and what I saw left my speechless.

Jaw hanging open, eyes taking in everything, I stepped through the doorway as Simon took a step to the side.

The whole apartment had been decked out in Christmas decorations. Tinsel, Christmas lights, stockings, it all hang around the open apartment. A tree sat in the corner, decorated from top to bottom in shiny gold and bronze ornaments. Carols played in the background, light enough not to disturb any conversation, but loud enough to add to the ambience. The smell of hot chocolate and candy canes wafted from the small kitchen to my left. Blankets and pillows were set close to the few presents that sat under the tree.

Slowly, after taking a few minutes to absorb the scene, I turned to Simon as he stood beside me, hands on hips and smile still in place, his own eyes looking at the room proudly.

“You did all of this… for me?”

Looking down at me, he gave a short nod. “You said you wanted Christmas, so here it is.” He gestured to the room. “I brewed some homemade hot chocolate, even managed to find some candy canes that hadn’t gone to shit, and I chopped the tree myself.”

My heart swelled and my eyes blurred as happy tears threatened to spill.

This man… this scary, overbearing, loud mouthed and intimidating man who helped lead and maintain our people and home, a man who could equally be threatening and welcoming… he’d done all of this, for me.

Oblivious to my emotions, Simon hurried forward, moving over to the tree to grab one of the presents, before coming over to me. “Before you do anything else, you have to open this.” He told me, trying to hide his excitement.

I grabbed the present from him, noticing how nicely it had been wrapped. “Okay, now you might have done everything else, but you had to have help wrapping this.” I teased.

“Shut up and open it already.”

Chuckling lightly, still trying not to cry, I ripped into the paper of the gift. As I tore into the paper I found that the gift had been wrapped in tissue paper. Ripping into that, I eventually got to the centre. I sucked in a breath as my fingers pried the gift out from the wrapping.

A baby Jesus figurine.

It was small, sitting nicely in the palm of my hand. It was wooden, handcrafted. The details weren’t as perfect as the original, and it hadn’t been painted, but it was just as beautiful, if not more.

“I saw the look on your face in the truck. I could tell how much Christmas means to you. And I knew you missed your family traditions.” Simon started, looking down at me, his smile not as wide as intimidating. It was sweet and gentle now. “I know what we have here isn’t perfect, and I know life can be a real bitch these days, but I thought you deserved a little something special.”

Slow tears rolled down my cheeks as I looked up at him, clutching the gift to my chest. “Thank you.”

Bamby