#plz rb this is took me ages to think of some of these jokes

[aslongasimhereyoureinvincible]

what your favourite Haikyuu!! ship says about you:

as inspired by Eldena Doubleca5st’s hilarious video series, go check them out!

Kagehina: rivals to lovers you ask, why not rivals AND lovers?

Daisuga: your ideal ship dynamic is team mom / team dad 

Asanoya: your ideal ship dynamic is best summarised by the ‘excuse me he asked for no pickles’ meme

Tsukkiyama: you love snarky assholes with a soft spot for One Specific Person

Ennotana: you just want good things for Ennoshita, and really, who wouldn't?

Kiyotana: either you just want good things for Tanaka OR you’re a firm supporter of Men! 👏 Getting! 👏 Pegged! 👏

Kiyoyachi: you’re not mad, per se, about kiyotana being canon, you just think kiyoyachi had way more chemistry 

Kinonari: you love characters who are in desperate need of more screentime 

Kinonoya: the Inarizaki match means everything to you

Tsukihina: you love opposites attract with a side of heavy symbolism 

Tananoya: your ideal date involves kissing the homies goodnight 

Yamayachi: nothing says ‘date night’ like you both having an anxiety attack over ordering take-out

Daiyui: you are heterosexual 

Hinayachi: Y’know what? Yachi was right, that scene where she and Hinata ran to the train station together was like a shoujo manga

Ukatake: I’m not sure if you wanna fuck dads, but you definitely wanna fuck positive male role models 

Kuroken: either you really like the ‘shy nerd’ / ‘cocky (but secretly also nerdy) jock’ dynamic OR you read the manga and chapter 318 made you fucking lose it 

Kuroyaku: you’re a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of mutually dunking on each other   

Kuroyakukai: you just really like Kai 

Yakulev: your ideal ship dynamic is morosexual / moron 

Shibalev:  you watched the Tokyo No Jin stageplay 

Shibainu: either you’re just here for the pun OR you’re a firm believer in the inherent eroticism of warming the bench 

Toraken: so to the top episode 17 huh? 

Fukutora: you just want good things for Fukunaga, and really, who wouldn’t?  

Iwaoi: either you fucking love angst OR you are deeply disappointed by the general lack of male tsunderes 

Matsuhana: your ideal date involves getting stick bugged, after-which hilarity ensues

Kyouhaba: your ideal date involves being kabedon-ed 

Kiniwa: your ideal date involves your senpai noticing you 

Kinkuni: you firmly believe that nothing brings people closer than mutual hatred for some asshole from middle school

Kyouiwa: this is just the same joke as Kiniwa except you also like bara 

Matsuhanaiwaoi: you think seijoh should’ve gone to nationals 

Ushioi: two options, either you still think “you should’ve come to Shiratorizawa jokes’ are peak comedy in 2020 (they’re really not) OR you love enemies to lovers

Ushiten: your ideal date involves a romantic candle-lit dinner in Paris, after which you are interviewed for a documentary together 

Tensemi: you were the weird emo kid in middle school

Semishira: snarky bickering married couples are your jam

Ushihira: you think the whole ‘ushiwaka and benkei’ thing is way too overlooked 

Ushigoshi: you love one sided rivalries that are met with obliviousness 

Shiragoshi: either you think Shirabu clowning on Goshiki is actually a display of affection OR you just have a thing for straight bangs 

Bokuaka: you are a proud morosexual, you are attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively

Bokukuro: this is just the same joke as tananoya but you like city boys 

Daikuro: you stay up way to late reading single dad au fics 

Bokudaikuro: thick!  👏 thighs!  👏 save!  👏 lives! 

Kuroshou: your ideal ship dynamic is snarky exes 

Daimika: you love that one John Mulaney bit that’s like ‘my wife is a bitch and I like her so much’ 

Sakukomo: /gestures at chapter 394/ I’m sorry for your loss lmao

Sakuatsu you love projecting your insecurities onto fictional characters so you can receive some form of positive affirmation by consuming content about them being loved unconditionally  

Ushisaku: your ideal date involves sharing cleaning tips and being blunt 

Atsukita: you want senpai to notice you but like,, you’re also a brat 

Kitaran: nothing brings two guys together like dealing with the twins’ bullshit

Osasuna: nothing brings two guys together like clowning on Atsumu 

Hiruhoshi: your ideal date involves asking your partner to hold your beer 

Hoshihina: ‘Short Kings Anthem’ by Tiny Meat Gang and blackbear is your personal hype song 

Atsuoi: your ideal ship dynamic is best summed up by that one text post that’s like: ‘you should be addicted to shutting the fuck up’ ‘you wanna fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid’ 

Akiten: you shipped akiteru and the og  little giant before it was cool  Akisae: you like hot blonds and Men! 👏 Getting! 👏 Pegged! Saeten: rekindled high school crushes? don’t mind if you do  Akisaeten: They all have two hands  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Atsuhina: you’re a firm believer in the inherent erotcism of stealing somebody else’s man 

Osahina: you think the setter / spiker ship dynamic is really over done  Oihina: brazil fling canon no one can change your mind 

Oisuga: what can you say? you like pretty boys 

Oikage: two options, either your ideal ship dynamic is ‘Love Like You’ by Rebecca Sugar OR you’re just here for some doujinshis 

Ushihina: you like the appeal of osahina buy you just don’t think their rivalry is that well established 

Kurotsukki: you’re a bit too into that whole ‘if he teases you it’s because he likes you’ dynamic 

Terushou: you are firmly situated in rare-pair hell 

Saemiwa: you think Miwa should’ve attended one of Karasuno’s games Miwalisa: your ideal ship dynamic is service provider / client 

Kanotana: you just want good things for Kanoka, and really? who wouldn’t? 

Nishiyaku: this is just the same joke as hoshihina except you prefer liberos  Those two scorekeepers from episode 1: you found out way too late that shipping things for shits and giggs is the gateway drug to shipping things for realises