#plz enjoy these blurbs no one asked for but that I was all too willing to provide

[softguarnere]

Anyways, I had a horrible day, so I think we deserve to have some Stark-St. Claire family blurbs . . . as a treat

Ranked below the cut according to how badly they hurt my feelings to write :)

"This would be fun to write!" -- No emotional damage because Chiara's sleepwalking shenanigans are funny to me

Tony is not an idiot. Quite the opposite, actually. But for some reason, the second he realizes that Chiara sometimes talks in her sleep catches him so off guard that he feels pretty stupid. And weirded out, if he’s being honest. Because, as if the fact that his daughter is a sleepwalker wasn’t already enough, now she can talk while she stands in the middle of his lab all Blair Witch style at one in the morning. 

“What did you say?” Tony asks. Admittedly, he’d been so taken aback by the fact that Chiara started talking that he didn’t bother to listen to what she was saying. “Sorry, kid. I didn’t catch that.” 

“Gotta . . . get Dad to help,” the teenager slurs in response. “Need to find Dad.” 

Okay, it’s probably rude of Tony to not comprehend anything Chiara said for the second time in a row, but the second she says the word dad his brain immediately blue screens. In all the months that Tony has known his daughter, they haven’t gotten to that point yet – she’s just been calling him by his name ever since she moved in here, and he really can’t blame her for that.

Yet here she is, at her most vulnerable, referring to him as her dad. From the depths of the kid’s subconscious, here’s the word that neither of them have worked up the nerve to really toss around. 

Sleepwalking is weird. (Hell, Chiara is weird enough on her own, but that’s a different conversation.) Tony’s not entirely sure if Chiara can see him, but he hopes for his own sake that she can’t. Because he actually smiles a little when his brain finishes buffering and the full weight of her words hits him. 

“Yeah, okay kid,” he says when he collects himself. “What am I helping with?” 

Still fun to write because it reminds me of that one B99 episode, but it hurts my feelings a little that neither of them is brave enough to acknowledge what was said

Finding out one of the richest and most powerful men on earth is your father is great for things like getting you taken out of public school. Which is great if you hate going to public school.

Yeah, Chiara definitely doesn’t miss those weird school lunches. Or gym class. Or pop quizzes. Or trying to remember locker combinations. 

Or this – everyone staring at her like she’s some sort of thing to be dissected under a microscope. And she certainly doesn’t miss the confusion of not knowing what she’s done to earn such a look. 

“What?” Chiara asks, slumping down in her chair a little to ignore the way heat rushes to her cheeks as Peter gapes at her.

For a second, the other teenager just stares at her with wide eyes before a somewhat mischievous grin spreads across his face. 

“Nothing,” he replies easily, shrugging. “I just don’t think I’ve ever heard you call Mr. Stark that before.” 

“What?” Chiara repeats, exasperated. “What’s wrong with calling him dude? I do it all the time.”

Peter’s eyes widen. “Ari . . . That’s so not what you just said.” 

“Yes, it is!” Chiara protests. “I said, ‘Okay, dude. See ya later.’” 

“You called him Dad,” Peter deadpans. 

There’s a beat of silence where Chiara considers jumping across the workbench and strangling him for that accusation. Which Peter must seem to realize, because he sets down the web-shooter he’s been working on and takes a step back. 

“FRIDAY?” he calls as he does so. “Can you roll back the tapes, please?” 

Chiara rolls her eyes. “Yeah, okay. Let’s do this courtroom style. Have FRIDAY play back my remarks and you’ll see that I never –” 

One of the holographic screens above the workbench comes to life, already playing the footage from a few seconds before. 

Good thing they’re not actually in court, because the tape does nothing but prove that Chiara has accidentally just perjured herself.

It hurt my feelings, but I wrote it anyways and had a fun time doing it

Any time that FRIDAY announces that there’s a problem with Chiara well after midnight,  it’s never a good sign. But at least it’s usually just to tell Tony that the teenager is sleepwalking and has gotten herself stuck in the stairwell again, since apparently she’s afraid of elevators even in her sleep. 

This is the first time that the AI has ever felt the need to preface an announcement by reading off statistics from the Department of Health telling him how many of Chiara’s classmates are currently absent from classes as they battle the newest stomach bug that’s terrorizing the public school system. 

Tony sets down the gauntlet he’s been working on, crosses his arms, and narrows his eyes up towards the ceiling. 

“FRI,” he sighs. “Is this a fancy way of you telling me that the kid has gone and gotten herself infected with the plague?” 

“Yeah, Boss.” If artificial intelligence could sound relieved, then that’s definitely the adjective that best describes how FRIDAY sounds right about now. “She appears to have a temperature of one hundred and one degrees, although she seems to be talking in her sleep, asking me to turn up the heat.” 

Cold chills, then. Any time Tony experiences that kind of thing, he usually just tries to sleep it off, not die, and hope it goes away. But that’s him being responsible – or, arguably, irresponsible – for himself. This is the kid’s wellbeing he’s got to consider now. 

As if she can sense his hesitation – which she probably can – FRIDAY pipes up again. “Boss, I’ve pulled together some references, including one from a parenting blog.” 

Parenting blog. Jesus Christ! Who would have ever thought that Tony Stark would be at a point in his life when he would have to consult a parenting blog, of all things, to figure out how to take care of his own child . . . A child he didn’t even know existed for fifteen years, but still. 

“Alright, FRIDAY. Lay it on me.” 

It’s a good thing that Chiara has got those little fairy light things that teenage girls seem to be obsessed with strung over her bed, or else Tony would A) trip, break his neck, and drop the glass of water he’s carrying while trying to find her bedside in the dark, or B) have to turn on the lights and risk scaring her awake. Because that one would probably involve accidentally triggering the kid’s freaky-ass shadow powers, and that’s really the last thing anyone needs right now.

“Chiara,” Tony whispers as he crouches down beside her bed, setting the water and the pills he carries on her nightstand. When she doesn’t stir, he places a hand lightly on her shoulder. “Hey, kid. Wake up.”

In the faint light, Chiara’s eyebrows scrunch together faintly. Then, without warning, she shoots up so that she’s propped on her elbow, her eyes glowing purple as she peers through the darkness. 

“Whoa! Hey, hey. hey. It’s okay,” Tony says, leaning back a little on his heels, as if that can somehow save him from Chiara’s line of fire. “It’s just me. You’re safe.” 

Chiara blinks a few times, and her eyes go back to normal. She squints at Tony through the darkness. 

“Dad?” she asks, her voice faltering as her body is wracked with a cold chill. “Dad, why is it so cold?”  

It would honestly hurt less if the kid actually had animated the shadows and hit him with their full force. Because the way Chiara asks that is . . . so unlike Chiara. It makes her sound vulnerable, like she needs help. Help, which is something she rarely asks for. Just like her mother. Hell, just like Tony. 

Maybe it triggers some sort of paternal instinct buried deep in Tony’s subconscious, because before he fully realizes what he’s doing, he reaches up and brushes Chiara’s dark hair back behind her shoulder, then gives her shoulder a gentle push to get her to lie back down. 

“It’s not cold, Ari,” he says, not even registering the use of the nickname he knows she has but that she seems to think is a big secret. “It’s just cold chills from the fever.” 

Chiara’s eyebrows knit together as she gazes up at him. “Am I sick?” 

“Yeah, kid. With whatever version of the plague all your classmates seem to be passing around.” 

“Oh.” Chiara frowns. There’s a beat of silence before she asks, “Can you fix it?” 

What a simple yet complicated question. He’s Tony Stark. He’s Iron Man. He’s supposed to be able to build or fix anything he sets his mind to. But taking care of his own daughter? That seems like a bit of a stretch. 

He’s not about to let anyone else know that, though. 

With all the confidence he can muster, Tony grabs the glass of water and the bottle of pills from Chiara’s bedside table, holding them out to her as if in offering. “Let’s find out.” 

"This will be fun to write >:)" -- and it hurt my feelings so bad to do so actually!

“Something’s happening,” Mantis informs them all in that way she has about her that’s completely open and honest. Lying to spare their feelings never seems to occur to her. And before it can, she turns into a cloud of dust and ashes before their very eyes, each little piece blown away by a sudden breeze.

Chiara’s heart plummets. She takes a step back from the scene, hand automatically reaching out for Peter’s. Her grip is so tight that you would think she was the one wearing a suit of iron.

One by one, people fade away, as if they were never there to begin with. Each disappearance is so horrible that Chiara can feel her heart rate increase every time. Because they all seem to know what’s happening before they go. And could they?

“Tony,” Dr. Strange says, making her father turn to him. “There was no other way.”

Then, he too fades to ashes that scatter themselves to the winds.

As the Doctor – Sorcerer? Wizard? She’s never been clear on what he actually is – fades away, something floods Chiara’s chest. Not the anxiety of watching those around her fade from existence, but something much different. It’s a deep, primordial feeling of dread and of knowing that feels somewhat akin to pouring boiling water into a cool glass and watching it shatter. And there is no mistaking what it is.

Peter’s grip on her hand loosens. His face is covered in a sheen of sweat. His eyes have turned glassy.

This is the one time, she realizes, that Peter Parker won’t – can’t – have her back. Not even Spider-Man can save the Dynamic Duo from this.

But maybe someone can. Someone who so casually adds genius to their own epithets. Because if someone’s own father can’t save them, then who can?

“Dad!” Chiara gasps. She staggers forward as he turns to face her, his eyes wide at the tone of her voice.

“No,” he says, stepping forward to meet her. “No, no, no. Chiara!”

Not even on the news after the Battle of Manhattan did he look afraid. Now, though, his eyes are brimming with fear. With concern, she realizes, for her – the daughter he’s only just been getting to know.

A sentence that Chiara has never before said in her life, because she’s had no one to say it to, slips past her lips. She feels helpless, like a child, when she hears her own voice, too loud and full of echo, as if she’s yelling into a fishbowl. “Daddy . . . I’m scared.”

“Chiara,” her father breathes. “Chiara – “

Whatever he tries to tell her is lost. Something shifts within her, as if something has dislodged in the very core of her being, and then – there is nothing.

Tony Stark is rarely speechless, but he’s stuck staring into thin air, at the place where his daughter was just a second before. Not for the first time in his life, the girl has slipped through his fingers.

I have about 3.5 different thoughts on how my Marvel OC calls her bio father "dad" for the first time, and they range from "This would be fun to write! :)" to "This would be fun to write! >:)"

[disasterdeacy]

Masterlist

Too Much Love Will Kill You (Series) Prologue Chapter One Charlotte Jones is the niece of the one and only David Bowie. Compared to her uncle she lives a relatively normal life, she’s just received her MA in Astronomy from Imperial College, she’s got friends who love her, and an uncle who would do absolutely anything for her.  She thinks her life couldn’t possibly get any better, until 13 July 1985 and a very insistent uncle happens... Warnings: Infidelity, Smut, Angst, Cursing, Age Gap (17 years), Lots of Fluff amidst a shit ton of angst

Some Day One Day: Present Day Brian May x Young Reader -  (Y/N) has been working as a volunteer at Save Me for almost a year whenever she gets a chance, and she absolutely loves it. Brian May has been overjoyed for the past 6 months, particularly when he gets the opportunity to work with his favorite young volunteer/lawyer (Y/N), the only issue? She’s 50 years younger than him, and he’s married… One night, after a particularly stressful week for the two, Brian decides that he can’t stand being away from his friend anymore, and plans a little excursion for the two, completely platonic of course…  Warnings: Infidelity, Age Gap (50ish years), Angst, Fluff, Drunk Brownies, Smut 

Never In My Wildest Dreams (Series)- Present Day Brian May x Young Reader

Part One: Y/N has been having a rather shitty week, feeling sick, tired, and just all around crappy. Arriving home from work, she wants nothing more than to curl up next to Brian and sleep…. Life, however, has other plans. Set two years after the end of Some Day One Day. Warnings:  Fluff, Angst, Pregnancy, General Issues With Mortality, Age Gap, Mentions of Hospitals, Roger Taylor, Ramen Part Two-  After leaving the hospital after receiving some rather amazing news, Y/N and Brian return home for Y/N to reward Brian for all of his.. hard work. Warnings: Sub!Bri, 18+, Age Gap, Unsafe Bathroom Practices Part Three-  The day after finding out she’s pregnant with twins, Y/N May and her husband enjoy a nice breakfast before being rudely interrupted. Warnings: Angst, 18+, Age Gap, wow kids can be rude and ungrateful man 

Taking Care of Business- Present Day Brian May x Young Reader- Brian misbehaves during dinner, forcing Y/N’s hand once they arrive home.. Warnings: pwop, 18+, age gap, sub!bri, hints of mommy kink, could be read w NIMWD and SDOD, lube is important, plz use lotion after bondage plz think of the skin 

Forbidden Fruit (Series) 1998 Brian May x Young Reader   Part One- Summary: Y/N is Jimmy May’s best friend in the entire world. So when she’s unable to return home for the 4th of July, he does what any good friend would and offers to have her come stay with him at his Dad’s place for the weekend, the whole thing culminating in a BBQ that would rival any her family ever threw. Little does Brian, or Y/N, know, this weekend will be memorable for more reasons than the burgers and sparklers. Warnings: Infidelity, Age Gap, 18+, Y’all This is Just Disgusting I’m Sorry Part Two- Summary: The 4th of July has come to Windlesham, and Y/N is ready and fed up with Brian’s teasing. Willing to risk it all, the two mismatched lovers spend the day making their own fireworks while trying to avoid being caught. Warnings: Infidelity, Age Gap, 18+, Unsafe Use of Kitchen Furniture, Don’t Fuck Beside Food Plz, Definite FDA Violations

Do It Yourself- Present Day Brian May x Young Reader- Y/N is feeling a bit neglected by Brian before a show, and decides to take matters into her own hands… Warnings:  18+, Age Gap, Activities Happening Around the Red Special Which Should Really Not Be Happening, Someone Please Clean Her

Dom!Present Day!Brian May x Young Reader Blurb- Reader accidentally on purpose steals one of Brian’s shirts and sends him picture proof, sending him into a frenzy of emotions he hasn’t felt in 25 years. Warnings: Sin, Dom Bri, Outdoor Sex, Age Gap, RIP Brian’s Paint Job

Sub!Present Day!Brian May x Young Reader Pegging Blurb- Reader discovers a long kept secret of Brian’s, and makes him regret not telling her about it sooner Warnings: Sub Bri, Age Gap, General Sin, Movie Night is Never the Same

Anything You Ask- Y/N and Brian have been friends and research partners for 2 years, but on a trip to Tenerife, everything changes Warnings: 18+, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Unprotected Sex, Like, Graphic Unprotected Sex, Wrap it Before You Tap it, Someone Get These Kids Some Gatorade and a Ciff Bar.

Present Day!Brian May x Young Reader Cock Warming Headcanon- I would say sorry, but I’m not. Warnings: 18+, Age Gap, Call Your Priest Y’all

Present Day!Brian May x Young Reader Backscratching Headcanon- This is just sweet as hell Warnings: Fluffy bb Bri, 

Lavender Knots-  Summary: The media is cruel, and while Y/N can deal with the pressures and nasty words, Brian doesn’t want her to have to… so, he decides to try and help her, by breaking up with her. Warnings: A N G S T (soz), Fluff (i’m not a sadist), Smut (oh boy its nasty), Age Gap, mentions of mortality, mentions of suicidal thoughts, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it unless you’re tryna get Bri to give you a baby, in which case, you do you sis), Major FDA Violations.

Slip-Up- SUBMITTED BY ANONYMOUS NOT MY OWN WORK :) Summary: Inspired by this video of Brian Harold May accidentally letting the world know what a giant sub he is.  Warnings: smut, sub!Bri, age difference, spanking, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, folks), creampie ( NSFW 18+ (obviously!!)

Harder, Faster Stronger- Summary: Brian isn’t usually the jealous type, but after seeing you and Gwilym a little too close to his liking, he’s shocked by just how jealous he can get. Warnings: 18+, Age Gap, Dom!Brian, For Once lol

Moonlight Mother- After Rock Montreal, John wants nothing more than to spend time with his wife, and discuss some very important details regarding their future family...  Warnings: Breeding Kink, Smut, Like seriously y’all, pure sin

John Deacon x Reader Period Sex Headcanon- Just read the title my dudes I have no words for myself Warnings: Apologies to Mr. Deacon 

Present Day Roger x Young Reader Birthday Headcanon - Written for the lovely @meddows-taylors birthday. Smutty little headcanons revolving around young reader’s birthday, and Roger’s idea of celebration... Warnings: Age Gap, Smut, unsafe use of kitchen furniture

Angel Eyes-  When your parents insist on meeting your new boyfriend Joe, you’re more than excited. You love your family and their opinion of your significant other means the world to you, you know they’re going to love him no matter what, but Joe is absolutely paralyzed with fear. Warnings: Angst (Slight), Fluff, Cursing, ABBA

Sub!Ben Strap On Headcanon- Y’all it’s just pure sin.  Warnings: uhhhhhh read the title sisters