#plus the idea of lynn needing to connect present amanda to past amanda + amanda needing to prove lynn was a success story since lynn

[1997berserk]

almost typed out a cunt vent post about my life but instead im going to talk about my fanfiction. i wrote this whole chapter intending for it to be ch 5 of heatsink but now I (and beta) think that it seems out of place coming straight from 4 and that I need a buffer chapter BUT I have no idea what to like, do to make it flow more and I'm gonna scream. I'm really invested in the two of them shying away almost unconsciously from directly addressing Lynn's test/etc to one another because I want to maintain the idea that like, Lynn is able to rationalize the intrusion Amanda is in her life by considering her almost a separate person that she can't fully reconcile with the person who kidnapped her, but at the same time that relationship to one another is what enables them to be close. soo i don't want to push too much ""deep"" interaction yet and eschew mundanity, but I also don't want to come off as sloppily shifting to "okay besties now" after setting up the whole trauma backdrop of the relationship. painnnnnnn also I did the thing where i got too into a chapter and I'm like NOW I HAVE TO KEEP MOVING FROM HERE W THE INSPIRATION NO GOING BACK