#pls someone clam my negative thoughts

[bkdk-bylerthings]

Yall what if byler isn’t canon 😰😰😰 like I KNOW I KNOW it will be but at the same time I feel like this big of a show would be scared to make them canon…idk…the backlash will be kinda scary….

Someone pls reassure me

[bbugyu]

:o i dont really know much about mbti types but u seem really knowlegable >.< what about dk's mbti??

oh my god the way i got a boner from being called knowledgeable OK LETS GO I LOVE SEOKMIN SO MUCH

seokmin is an infp, which is the mediator. i actually float between this personality type and infj (the advocate, which is also what wonwoo jihoon and minghao are), so seokmin and i are very similar in a lot of ways - our differences come from our zodiac signs i think ㅠㅠ; infps are actually really rare! yet seventeen has four KDJFSK they value harmony and authenticity and they always have the best intentions - which!!! IS SO SEOKMIN!!!! he will always see the best in people and always act with the best intentions! he is kind to a fault! what a sweet baby.

ok, here’s the breakdown. under the cut. tw seokmin best boy

seokmin is so shy. he doesn’t seem it, because when he’s with svt he goes BUCK FUCKING WILD but in reality he clams up around people he’s not super comfortable around. example: that one picture of him standing with yuju from gfriend where he looks like he’s gonna shit himself kJHFJS or when he was filming his solo parts for the mama performance and he kept saying how nervous he was without the members. he’s super reserved around people he hasn’t known for forever. he even tends to be quiet on variety shows, only really doing his fun comedy bits and talking when other members prompt him (which is almost always jeonghan or seungkwan don’t get me started). infjs (like isfjs) tend to keep a very small group of friends that they are very open and seemingly extroverted with, which is why we get to see seokmin’s genuine personality a lot. he is so fully himself when he is with seventeen and i think that is so beautiful. that being said, infps also are the most social introverts. he makes friends everywhere, and genuinely cares about all of them. his excallibur castmates have said that he was such a bright loving personality on stage and behind the scenes, and he would always visit and support them even after they stopped working together! he went to plays they starred in and posted pictures with them, telling carats to go support them too. you can tell they really appreciated this, because they would return the favor and go to seventeen concerts to cheer him on!

seokmin’s intuition is no joke. he seems a little naive at times, but he is also extremely good at looking at the big picture of a situation and deciding what needs to be done, ie. when they were leaving the venue during ttt he was seemingly the only one that remembered they left a giant mess in the kitchen. that being said, infps skip over details a lot. he also is SO FUNNY like he is genuinely the FUNNIEST MEMBER in my opinion because he just understands every situation so clearly. he’s able to take something a little mundane or whatever and comment on it or react in a way that’s REALLY FUNNY like when they were driving home from ttt and mingyu said he could buy the walnut sweets JFDSKJDSF mingyu wasn’t expecting him to say yes bc they’re such a common treat and seokmin laughed at first but hten immeidately was like “oh actually yes order them” and gyu was like ??? but seokmin kept just saying “stop talking to me order the walnut sweets pls” GODD THEY’RE SO FUNNY i literally cry laugh at shit seokmin does like i don’t know how he does it he’s the funniest motherfucker i’ve ever seen.

he seems like the most understanding member of svt to me. the others are too, ofc, but seokmin’s on another level. infps also feel very deeply and genuinely. as an intuitive personality type, he is immensely empathetic, but not in the same way that jeonghan is. seokmin feels other peoples’ emotions like they’re his own. he sympathizes fully and completely, and i think he tries really hard to internalize that as to not seem so emotional all the time, but as soon as the facade cracks he starts cRYINGGG like he’s a BABY he can’t help it he just FEELS SO MUCHhhh. idk if anyone else notices this but he always repeats what is being said? i find this to be related because he is actively listening, and his way of showing is affirming with short responses every few sentences. he seems like such a good person to go to when you’re struggling and want someone to comiserate with. seungkwan is someone you go to when you need advice, but seokmin is the one you go to when you want to vent, because he’ll immediately match how you’re feeling about the situation and empathize with you.

i think seokmin also tends to take things personally? i think he’s gotten better about this in recent years and instead uses it as a joke, but you can tell it still bothers him sometimes ㅠㅠ like, okay, so seokmin posted that picture for seungkwan’s birthday and said something along the lines of “do you remember when we went out to have fun and fought? sorry i couldn’t be better” etc so in boo’s birthday live he explained the situation because it was resolved nicely. he said that the two of them went kayaking with jeonghan (which, btw, booseokhan are literally married and i am the most spoiled carat ever) and got in a little disagreement about something menial, and seungkwan thought it was resolved quickly, but afterwards jeonghan was driving them and seokmin put on a song and boo was like “oh what kind of song is this?” as a joke, but seokmin took it personally and got sulky. but then him and jeonghan danced to anysong and honestly who can blame them. it seems like every time he gets in a fight with other members, he thinks about how he doesn’t want it to tear them apart, so no matter how mad he is, he tries to find a way to resolve it. like with the gray bag incident JDHFKJHF he said that he thought if he didn’t pick up the bag, mingyu might hit him. he was mad and thought he was in the right, but he didn’t want the argument to escalate, so he did something he didn’t want to end it where it was. also, when jeonghan went live during seokmin’s live, saying “those who want to watch dokyeom watch him, those who want to watch this watch this,” and seokmin got all sulky about carats saying they wanted to see what jeonghan was up to. he laughed and said he was kidding, but then he was like “i’m not fun anyways.” whiCH leads us to...

infps have chronic inferiority complexes, but they aren’t envious people, so it manifests in just being immensely self critical. seokmin genuinely believes he isn’t handsome. or a good singer. like. what the fuck is that all about. i get genuinely angry when i think about this. i could talk about how fucking WRONG he is but this is just supposed to be a personality analysis so i’ll just mention that i talked about why i think he’s the perfect man alive in another ask! check that out if you want JKFHKSDF he always has negative things to say about himself but only positives to say about others. which makes me wanna fight. he also is maybe too idealistic??? like i said before, he will always see the best in other people, and it leads the rest of the members to genuinely worry about him. they’re worried that if they’re not there to take care of him, he’ll end up getting taken advantage of by someone. they don’t want him to get scammed ㅠㅠ

some other aspects of infp personalities that i think suit seokmin well but i’m literally braindead and cannot write more of this: open minded, passionate, determined, and loyal.

i would marry seokmin in an instant.

[ladysophiebeckett]

a loophole

Santa Clarita Diet\The Good Place Crossover AU

(spoilers for both shows) 

for you my love, @ssaalexblake​ . happy birthday. I apologize for it being so late. And not making an edit for this.  also this is dialogue only. so, again, I’m sorry. pls enjoy

Summary: The Good Place fights for Joel and Sheila Hammond.

Joel: ‘Everything is Fine’? Everything is not fine. I’m dead. My wife is dead. We’re dead. We’re real dead! Like, for real dead!

Shelia: Joel, calm down. I’m sure this Judge—this very fair and might I add stunning—Judge, will explain everything.

Gen: Ya Dead.

Joel: Oh my god.

Sheila: I can’t die!

Joel: We can’t die!

Sheila: We don’t die!

Joel: We’re realators!

Gen: You know you lose points every time you mispronounce that.

Joel: FORK!

Shelia: Points?

 *****

Joel: So you can make anything appear?

Janet: Yes. Except people who are currently alive. I also cannot ‘make’ people. I already did that and my Void cannot go through that again.

Joel: Right, my Void can’t do that either.

Janet: You don’t have a Void. You are not a Janet. You are a Joel.

Joel: …Right. I’m a Joel. Huh. That feels oddly reassuring.

Janet: I’m here to help.

Joel: Thank you, Janet and if it is at all possible, I would like to request a quart of ice cream—

Janet: I physically cannot do that.

Joel: But—

Janet: I can give you frozen yogurt in any flavor. We have all of them.

Joel: I’ll have another shrimp cocktail.

Janet: Of course.

 ********

Shelia: So this is your house?

Eleanor: Yup. ‘Icelandic Primitive’.

Shelia: That’s your essence?

Eleanor: Um, no. I mean, yes. Now. What? You don’t think I can be Icelandic Primitive?

Shelia: I didn’t say that. I just don’t think it captures you.

Eleanor: You’re not a real estate agent anymore—

Shelia: Rea-Hm. Realtor.

Eleanor: Still can’t pronounce it huh?

Shelia: It’s a surprisingly hard word.

Eleanor: Real-tor. Real-TOR. Realator. Oh.

Shelia: See?

 *******

Shelia: Is it just me or does everything feel a little bit off?

Joel: You feel it too? It was the shrimp wasn’t it?

Shelia: Yes!

Joel: They said they were jumbo but they were medium at best. God, I miss writing yelp reviews. I would give ‘The Good Plates’ 3 stars.

Shelia: 3 stars? That’s a little harsh. You weren’t nearly as hard on Japopos and their clams literally killed me.

Joel: It’s the taste. It’s off. Like they’re using lemon instead of lime. They’re both part of citrus family but their taste is very distinct.

Shelia: …Right. That’s what I’m trying to say. It’s off. This is supposed to be paradise.

Joel: It is. Sort of. Except no ice cream. We can’t curse. We live in this house—which is not our essence at all.

Shelia: I thought this house was your essence?

Joel: Why would my essence be a Spanish Colonial? Yeah I want to spend eternity in a Chris and Christa Knock Off Home. I’d rather die again.

Sheila: Oh my god.

Joel: Shelia, we’re already dead, again. It’s not offensive.

Sheila: Joel.

Joel: Sheila.

Sheila: The Spanish Colonial isn’t my essence either.

Joel: But I thought---

Sheila: No. I’d rather spend eternity in—

Joel: Our starter home.

Shelia: This isn’t The Good Place.

 *******

Eleanor: Let me get this straight—this couple from Santa Clarita dies. They’re zombies—

Sheila: The term is ‘Undead’.

Joel: We don’t like the ‘Z’ word.

Eleanor: ---You pop into Earth for 5 seconds and in those 5 seconds you see these, Undead people, and you feel bad for them? So instead of being impartial, you hide them here?

Gen:  It’s complicated.

Eleanor: What about our experiment? This puts it in jeopardy. Somehow—I don’t know how but it does.

Gen: It doesn’t because this is case is different from yours.

Joel: Can someone explain what’s happening?

Eleanor: How is it different? They’re bad people and you’re trying to hide them in a controlled Good Place that’s supposed to help us show that your point system is flawed. That’s unethical. You’re being unethical.

Gen: If Chidi were here--

Eleanor: Don’t bring him up.

Sheila: Who’s Chidi?

Joel: That moral philosophy professor. We met at that welcome party. He couldn’t stop talking about almond milk.

Sheila: Oh. The guy with the stomachaches.

Gen: As I was saying—If Chidi were here—he would understand.

Eleanor: Well he’s not. And I am. So explain your oh so complicated reasoning.

Gen: Joel and Sheila Hammond are good people.

Joel and Sheila: Thank you.

Gen: But they’re also bad people.

Joel and Sheila: Fork.

*****

 Sheila: We’ve been judged on points our entire lives?

Gen: Yes. And when you died the first time your point system paused for approximately 20 seconds. And when you came back your points rebooted. While Joel…

Joel: Lost a lot. Because I’m the reason she died.

Shelia: It wasn’t your fault.

Gen: It was. Every murder you committed had a positive and negative impact.

Eleanor: You’re murderers?!

(Joel and Sheila stare at Eleanor)

Eleanor: Oh wait. I already knew that. Why am I surprised? Oh wait. It’s because you ate your victims. Mr. and Mrs. Hannibal Lecter everybody.

Shelia: I’m sensing judgement.

Joel: We only killed bad people.

Shelia: You’re taking this way worse than Abby ever did and she was only 16 when she saw us bury Gary in the desert.

Eleanor: What the fork? Ugh. I hate the swear wards. It’s a bunch of bullshirt.

Joel: How do you think we forkin’ feel? Abby would hate it here.

Shelia: I know. I miss her.

Joel: Me too.

Eleanor: Who the fork is Abby?

Sheila: Our daughter.

Eleanor: Zombies raising a daughter in suburbia.

Joel: Undead Realators doing our best to provide for our daughter.

 *****

Eleanor: So killing Nazi’s is okay.

Gen: Yes. Nazi’s are terrible people and them getting murdered was a good thing.

Joel: See? We’re good people.

Gen: But the point system gives you an even amount of good people points and bad people points.

Sheila: Because even though they were bad people, the act of murdering—

Joel: --Despite who you are murdering—

Gen: Correct.

Eleanor: …What are their points?

Gen: Are you ready? It’s a doozy.

Joel: But we saw our points when we got here.

Shelia: Unless…those weren’t real.

Gen: Yeah, they’re not. Take a look.

Eleanor: Oh. I wish Chidi were here.

Gen: Told ya.

 *****

 Shelia: Well then. The Solution is simple Gen. Can I call you ‘Gen’. I feel like we’re very familiar now that I see that you hold our afterlives in the palm of your hand.

Gen: You may. ‘Judge Gen’ was only fun for the first millennia.

Eleanor: This isn’t simple at all.

Joel: Yeah it is. Sheila goes to The Good Place—

Sheila: Joel no---

Joel: And I go to The Bad Place. It’s logical. The points are pretty self-explanatory. Which is something I never thought I’d say because I am very bad at math. Remember when I calculated our first commission and I was off by a 1000 dollars?

Sheila: There has to be something---

Eleanor: It’s ONE POINT! Can you just--

Gen: Why do you think I hid them away with you? I was buying time. As a Judge, I have to be impartial but when I saw their case—

Eleanor: You thought that if we could properly prove that bad people could change in the afterlife, it would show that the point system was flawed. But then they died, again, and they were already good people but the point system would separate them. And you were hoping that if our case succeeded it would support their case---

Gen: Yes.

Eleanor: So this whole time you were just hiding them from The Bad Place because if they knew about them they would go to some afterlife trial—like Mindy St. Claire’s case. And they would end up in some Middle Place but still not together.

Gen: Separate Middle Places. Yes.

Sheila: We’re not separating!

Joel: Shelia look at the points! They don’t lie!

Shelia: The points don’t matter! Haven’t you been listening! It’s flawed! Look, I don’t care about The Good Place. Let them take me instead. It’s my fault anyway. I’m the reason you died the first time.

Joel: And I’m the reason you died the first time.

Shelia: I’m the reason you died the second time! If I had been—

Joel: It wasn’t your fault.

Sheila: It was supposed to be date night---

Joel: Sheila, it’s okay. I made a vow that night. Do you remember? I swore to be loyal to you and only you. I promised to protect you, to protect our family—no matter what. No matter the sacrifice. This is me—honoring that.

Sheila: That’s not fair.

Joel: Maybe not, but it’s the right thing to do. I go to The Bad Place. How bad can it be? I used to eat people. And bleed black ooze. Which was gross to me every time. I never got used to that.

Sheila: There is no Good Place for me without you. As corny as this may sound…You are my Good Place.

Joel: And as corny as this may sound, you’re mine.

Eleanor: Fork. Does anybody have a tissue?

Gen: Here’s my sleeve.

*****

 Sheila: Thank you for letting Joel have ice cream one more time.

Gen: It’s the very least I can do. I recommended a burrito but he said no.

Shelia: He loves them, but they make him gassy. I tried to explain that that won’t happen here—

Gen: Oh it will. Trust me.

Sheila: Oh. Hmm. Well, look I’m not gonna pussy foot around it—I can say ‘pussy’? Huh. A loophole. Anyway, no time. I’m not gonna pussy foot around it. Let me take Joel’s place instead.

Gen: I can’t do that. The points—

Shelia: Fork the points. It’s one point. You managed to hide us here with fake points. So just—give him one of mine.

Gen: Do you know how hard it was to even to do that? It’s not easy Sheila. I know I make it look easy—these robes are very misleading. But—

Shelia: I don’t care. Let me take his place.

Gen: I will look into it. But I can’t make any promises.

*****

Joel: Did Sheila talk to you?

Gen: (sighs) Yes.

Joel: Did she ask to take my place instead?

Gen: No.

Joel: Okay, good—

Gen: She demanded it.

Joel: Dam it. Dam? Oh. Dam. Like the beaver or that thing that stores water. A loophole. Did not see that. Anyway, no time. Don’t listen to her. Whatever she told you. This—it’s the right thing to do. I just have one request.

Gen: You already had your last meal--

Joel: The ice cream was great, thank you, but no. Something else.

Gen: I can’t let you go back to earth and tackle Chris to the ground. He is 6’5, he would still win.

Joel: That’s not—Really? Even as a—

Gen: Those 3 inches make a difference.

Joel: Whatever. Not what I wanted.

Gen: It’s one of the things you wanted.

Joel: Anyway. I just—can you promise me—Can you guarantee that Sheila not only goes to The Good Place but that she’s happy? I’m not a big fan of this ‘soul mate’ thing—but I can’t stand the thought of Sheila being alone.

Gen:  I can promise you that she will get into The Good Place.

Joel: And?

Gen: That’s it. What happens after is beyond me. I can’t promise you anything.

 *****

Sheila: So he goes into one vault and I go in the other?

Gen: You’re gonna get a little sick but it’ll pass. Just don’t breath through your mouth. The vomit just flies---

Joel: Why does that sound grosser than anything we’ve ever done?

Eleanor: Are you sure there isn’t anything else you can do?

Gen: No. This is it. Say your goodbyes. Anymore time wasted and—well nothing happens. Time isn’t a thing here. We could all chill and catch up on Grey’s Anatomy. They have thirty-six seasons. Thirty-Six!  But we’re only delaying the inevitable.

Sheila: This is it then.

Joel: Forty-five years.

Sheila: We only made it to one Bop.

Joel: I have no regrets.

Sheila: I do. Just the one.

Joel: What’s that?

Shelia: We should have mailed that deed to Gary’s niece. It would have reduced our carbon footprint. And then maybe—

Joel: I don’t care. I would do it all over again.

Eleanor: (crying) How does keep happening to me?

*****

 Eleanor: I can’t believe it. They’re just gone? They’re good people. Like, real good people. I mean, a little problematic because of the murder. But it was just one point--

Gen: Yup. One point. Unless---

Eleanor: Unless what?

Gen: They were human and still accumulating points.

Eleanor: Wait. What?

Gen: Think about it.

Eleanor: You know I am not good at that.

Gen: You humans are so slow. On earth they were Undead. Then they died, again. When they arrived to your neighborhood Good Place, they were human. The points rebooted.

Eleanor: What?!

Gen: It’s complicated. Serbia is…complicated. Being dead and then undead and dead again—it’s everything cancelling each other out. It’s like—

Eleanor: A loophole.

Gen: I cannot confirm that.

Eleanor: You—their points---

Gen: Are even.

Eleanor: I don’t---

Gen: Let’s just say, they both asked something of me in their final moments. And it evened them out.

Eleanor: But they went into different vaults?

Gen: Leading to the same place.

*****

 Sheila: What are you doing here?

Joel: What are you doing here?

Shelia: I’m taking your place!

Joel: She promised me you would go the real Good Place.

Sheila: Unless this is—

Joel and Sheila: Fuck!

Sheila: Wait--

Joel and Shelia: Fuck?!

Sheila: FUCK!

Joel: FUCK!

Sheila: HOLY FUCKING FUCK !

Joel: MOTHERFUCKING FUCK !

Janet: Hello!

Joel: FUCK!

Janet: My name is Janet.

Shelia: We’ve met.

Janet: No, we haven’t. I’m your neighborhood’s Janet. There are millions of me for every Good Place neighborhood.

Sheila: Say that again?

Janet: Hello, my name is Janet—

Shelia: No, the other thing.

Janet: There are a millions of me—

Shelia: No—

Joel: This could take hours—Janet where are we?

Janet: This is The Good Place. Neighborhood #6969.

Joel: Wait—

Shelia: Later, Joel. No, not that like that. Well maybe like that—

  --Fin—