#pls send guy your healing spells everyone

[witchconnectingdotes]

PICK A CARD : What is a quality of yours that u perceive as a flaw 🍃

Hello everyone I wanted to do a quick short very very disorganized pick a card today.

What is a quality of yours that u perceive as a flaw.

These are the piles (1,2,3) pls I do my reading in voice notes so there are MANY spelling errors in this. I just feel more comfortable speaking when doing a reading.

This is for entertainment only take what resonates leave what doesn’t ofc I am trying to pick up on collective energies I��m sorry if it doesn’t resonate 😭.

also I haven’t done PAC for a while I’m pretty rusty 😔

Pile 1 🌊

Hello pile number one welcome to your reading so for you guys it’s obviously kind of a cliché thing, but you guys might be very very generous with your empathy with your love for people I feel like you guys don’t hold back when you care for someone you are not at all stingy with the affection you give to people and I would also go to say that you put your whole soul you pour your love into people and you provide them consistency you provide them help you provide themsupport I feel like you guys are very supportive of this person and the way you might see it as a floss sometimes is that maybe you guys have had people take advantage of you before? Like you feel like being a lover boy or a lover girl is kind of a sacrifice in the society or something like that you feel like kind of led to the slaughter but because you can’t help but to give love and empathy to people and you think that you should work more on your boundaries well, it is true. I’d say that there is a part of this to be healed with the seven of ones here I feel like you should stand up more for what you like and maybe you are in this pet already, making more firm boundaries but here I feel like you should not see the love your capacity for love and the amount of love that you have in you you should not see it as something to have to with or limit because I feel like if you just let it out with the right person you will have something that is so beautiful.

Pile 2 🌱

OK, so pile two is very very different from pile 1. I would say that on the contrary, this person well you guys have more of a cut off kind of behavior when it comes to people who have wronged you, and this can be taken to the extreme in your opinion, I feel like some people might’ve told you that you guys are very rigid or kind of cruel or that you guys really hurt them or you’re very detached but what I want you to focus on here is that you you are just very intuitive. You know when something doesn’t serve you anymore. You know when someone is being deceitful with you. I feel like you guys are kind of sometimes you might think how bad people think and it has helped you in a lot of situations where you knew when to get out I feel like you might perceive yourself as a little bit cold or heartless, but I want you guys to know that it is not, true you guys are equipped with a very precious skill, and that is to take action to know when to send back to know when to let’s go to know when to take the decisions that you know might be hurtful for you and for the other person, but it must be done because it is better I feel as though you are not afraid of being alone. This is a pile of people who are not scared of walking alone, and they might see it as a flaw in the sense that it might make you a loner or you feel that you can’t make connections with people because people can be very bad but it’s actually agift to know how to protect yourself

Pile 3🦋

For the third pile, I would say that a quality of yours that you see as a flaw is your desire or kind of seemingly always being on the move like I feel like you might not feel like you belong to any place in particular you feel like you are a multi ul being in some sort or like someone who belongs to multiple places someone who can stick to one place and the issue here that you might see as a floor is you don’t see yourself as very grounded, but I wouldn’t see it that way in my opinion it comes more as someone who is a word being, I would see it as someone who can adapt anywhere I would see it as someone who can travel anywhere and basically survive anywhere because they are a quite cooperative person and a person that integrates different cultures quite easily. It’s someone who is not very rigid it’s someone that is not very tight to one place and it’s not at all something that is, bad or something that shows lack of sadness I would see it more as a sense of being grand or big. I don’t know how to express it, but in a way it’s as if you are a child of the word. this reading is a little shorter because it’s very difficult for me to express I would say that it’s more so an openness. You are very open to the different possibilities and while some people might see it as someone who doesn’t stick to one plan someone who’s not organized or someone who doesn’t stick to it I would say that it’s someone who can see different possibilities and who can move from part to part who can, walk away from a place and from a person and jump to another but not in a way like not in a serial dating way or in a bad way more so as an open and adventurous way, I feel like there is a wisdom in your adventurous because it helps you learn from different places

[aliorsboxostuff]

Hi! If your requests are open I have one! Just saw ATSV yesterday and its rotting my brain agsisghagdh anyways-

An M!Spider!Reader who is one of Miguel's trusted agents with a tendency to overwork himself to make sure that his teammates are kept safe and ignoring his own health in the process. This understandably makes Miguel very concerned but this man cannot healthily express this are you kidding? What I'm saying is classic troupe of patching you up while scolding you in Spanish and then maybe they kiss a little bit and well if you want to make it a little spicy I wont stop you >:]

Thank you very much! Genuinely makes my gay little heart happy when I see writers like you who exclusively write for gn/male readers, y'all are the backbone of the x reader community fr 💜

A/N: im so sorry this took so long this was months ago but a mf forgot and wow here i am yippee!!!! As usual, if yall find any spelling mistakes pls inform me as i’m always praciticing this damn 2nd language lmao. Lets see if my writing skills is still any good LOL enjoy!! <333

Careless 

Tags: Miguel O’hara xM!Reader, Spidey!Reader, Lyla, Miles Morales, Gwen Stacy, Spider Society, No Smut, Kissing , Fluff, Reader is another spiderman, Soft!Miguel, slight OOC, patching up, healing fic, non-graphic description of wounds, mentions of blood and cuts 

Yet, with all that said, Miguel likes to remind himself that no spidey truly comes home unscathed.

Ever since the new guy joined the team, he quickly rose in the ranks and became Miguel’s right-hand man. He’d usually go on patrol, jumping from one universe to another with the man as they capture and contain anomalies like the bugs they are. Miguel puts his trust in him, well, as much trust as a man like Miguel can put in someone. But despite the short time the newbie has been in the Spider society, he has managed to capture Miguel and most of the Spider people's hearts so easily. 

He’s a comet that passes by the compound. Each time he returned from a mission, the spiders would gather around him, congratulating him on another successful mission and inviting him to drink or eat together.  A aswarm would always gather around the portal they knew he would come out from and each time, without fail, he would emerge to cheers and smiles. It wasn't like everyone else wasn't doing a good job, they were all doing what they were supposed to, but somehow the newbie was liked all around, solidifying Miguel’s slowly growing infatuation with him. 

But despite the trust and praises he gets, a spidey doesn't come home unscathed, not every time. Sometimes he’d come back from one of his solo missions with a broken rib or two, bruises in more places than necessary, a torn muscle here a twisted ankle there. He’d limp his way into the infirmary, an army of other spideys following him in worry yet he’d dismiss them easily with a simple wave and a; “It’s nothing guys, I’ll be fine,”

Miguel hates it.

Whenever the man goes on missions with the leader of the society, without fail, he will come home with nothing more than one or two bruises that would heal in a couple of hours if not minutes. Miguel would roll his shoulders back and the man would simply shake his head furiously like a dog before prancing to greet his waves of fans. Miguel didn't need to pay attention to him unless they were doing teamwork. He would run around by himself, track down the anomaly with him, and they would contain it easily and transfer it back just as easily. 

He might not look like it, but when Miguel brings a teammate with him on duo missions, he’s expected to cover their back and vice versa. Miguel will break any skull that dares to hurt his team and he hopes for the same response from his teammate. The newbie never disappoints. 

Miguel would find himself enraged, almost cornered by an anomaly, and there come’s Prince Charming with a devastating kick towards the anomaly’s side which sends it hurling into another building. Miguel appreciates their duo missions, the main reason he puts himself with the newbie. 

Not to mention, he makes a great team leader too. He’s carried out several missions with the younger ones, mainly Miles and Gwen, and despite it all, they always return successfully and with a snack in hand. When he goes on missions with Hobie, they’d somehow come back with a new intricate playlist created and when he goes on missions with Pavitr, they’d come back with pockets full of trinkets ready to give them to the other youngins. All in all, a solid team leader.

Yet, with all that said, Miguel likes to remind himself that no spidey truly comes home unscathed.

—

You were on a mission with Miles. One of your duo missions with the boy, rare considering Gwen usually tags along. But today she’s got a mission with Pavitr and Peni, which leaves you and Miles for some quality Dude Time. 

It was a sunny day in the universe Miles and you dropped in. As the two of you swing from building to building, talking about Miles’ thing with Gwen and laughing at how embarrassed he gets, continuing the topic to buying a new Lego set for Pavitr and Hobie as the two of you swung past a Lego shop, when suddenly the anomaly reveals itself.

Another variant of Doc Oct holding themselves up with their extended metal arms. You can handle a Doc Oct alone, and with Miles helping you, the mission was expected to be so easy you were already thinking about what to have for dinner. 

But things don't always go according to plan, does it?

It strikes 8 pm when Miguel gets a notif from Lyla that an arriving portal was opened into the containment site of the compound. The man clicks his tongue, dropping from his platform before making his way to the site. Every step he takes he leaves his foul mood like a repellent, making the other spidey avoid him, cutting the middle path of the other spideys like a blade. His scowl is not helping his case either way.

The last portal should've been at 6 pm.

The door slides open, and a slight hiss rings out into the room. Inside the evenly lit expanse of the room, he easily spots yours and Mile’s spider suits in between all the other anomaly's dingy outfits. Miguel takes a breath before he stalks towards the two men, their backs to him.

“Ugh, my rib is killing me,” You groan, pressing in the code to store the anomaly in its cell.

“You're telling me, this bruise is going to be a pain in the butt to heal,” Miles sighed, holding his left arm. “But if it weren't for you, man, I’d be dead meat,” 

“Oh come on Miles, none of us knew the guy would send a gas truck our way,” You scoff. The terminal beeps and the thrashing anomaly is contained. 

“The fact that it burned on its way towards us was also something we didn't expect.” Miles laughs at what you said as you find yourself cringing. You knew there were going to be burn marks on your leg.

“No, but seriously, thanks for covering me back there, I thought we’d-”

“You thought you’d what?” 

Miles practically jumps into your arms as the both of you screams. You shut your eyes and it seems like Mile’s did the same before a stern cough makes you peek through your eyelids. There, in front of you, stands a solid wall of muscle and anger. Miguel has his arms crossed, eyes so sharp it could cut a mountain in half. The slight scowl on his lips would be cute if it weren't for the pure bloodlust as he gazes down into you, making you gulp.

“Heeeeeey Miguel,” Your pathetic excuse of a smile was met with nothing but him deepening his frown. Okay alright yup.

Miles awkwardly scuffles down your arms. He coughs into his fist, pulling at the edge of his suit. “Hi there haha…”

Miguel stares. “The last arrival portal should've been at six.”

Not a sound from you or Miles. Miguel holds back a growl. 

“You two are late.”

“Right, ‘m sorry Miguel, I promise this would be the last time, it was just that- See me and Miles here; we didn't realize that this Doc Oct was gonna be slightly more insane than the others-” You ramble, Miles quickly nodding along. 

“And haha, well, one truck lead to another and next thing ya’ now, bam! We got uh… hurt,” A nervous chuckle left your lips. Miguel replies nothing.

“B-but! I covered Miles from the fire! So he only got a couple of bruises, I promise the kid is fine and it wasn't his fault either so let’s just-”

“Enough.” He barks. You practically clamped your mouth shut. 

The doors hisses open again and Gwen comes running in, worry on her face. She sighs in relief as he spots Miles hiding beside you. “Miles! Thank goodness you’re okay!” 

Miguel turns as she runs and wraps her arms around the boy. “You came back so late!”

“I’m sorry Gwen, things got a bit out of control,” Miles pats the girl back reassuringly. “I just got a bit beaten up, nothing I can't handle,” 

Gwen pulls back and grabs the boy's face before turning it left and right and up and down, her eyes scanning like a hawk. She deems it enough as she stops, hands firmly holding Miles’ arms. “You always say that,” She sighs. 

You can't help the small relieved smile on your lips as you watch the two teens catch up with each other before Miguel makes a gesture with his hand.

“Gwen, go take Morales into the infirmary.” He says as he nods to Lyla that popped up on his brace. “And make sure he doesn't get out of bed for the next two days.”

“What?! But it’s barely a scratch-” 

“Now, Morales.” The man stares them down until eventually, Miles relents with a sigh and lets the girl usher him into the Infirmary's direction, the two of them shuffling next to each other, Gwen's arm around Miles. 

You hear something along the lines of ‘detention’ from Gwen as she laughs before the door slides close, leaving you with an enraged lion in its territory. You gulp as Miguel fixes his red eyes on you.

“You. Come with me.” 

And that's how you find yourself walking down the halls of the many living quarters of the compound. You followed silently behind Miguel’s broad shoulders, in any other day you would find it hard to resist not ogling those massive arms, but tonight Miguel was practically a walking beacon of rage. The smallest misstep would make him burst and thats the last thing you want to happen. 

“Miguel, I'm sorry, okay?” You try, catching up to walk beside him. “I promise this will be the last time I’ll come back from a mission late, plus, I won't bring anyone else with me too if I ever do it again. I swear this won't hap-”

His sudden halt catches you off guard and you bump against him. You scratch the bridge of your nose with a slight frown from the impact. The dimly lit hallway made it a slight challenge to read the nameplate but you managed to make out ‘O’Hara’ and with that, your stomach drops.

“Um… Miguel, this isn't my room…” 

The door opens. The room is pitch black. 

Miguel makes his way inside. His red eye glows before he commands; “Sit.” 

Fear brought you to sit on his bed, not a crease in sight which only struck your fear deeper into you. You could hear your heartbeat, terrified for what's to come. The worst thing Miguel could do would probably chew you out in the comfort of his room, away from any possible witnesses, and then maybe take you out of commission for a while as your punishment. 

You gulp as the man sets something beside you. It was a box, hard to make out what it was but it seemed heavy. Miguel clawed and the large hand extends towards you and you screw your eyes shut, hell did you pray to any god that was willing to listen to you so please please please-

“Bring your face closer.” 

Huh?

Cautiously, you open your eyes to Miguel’s face inches away from you, a warm light bathes over his features, making the lines of worry and fear evident. “Let me see your wounds.” 

You blink, once, twice, owlishly, making the man before you sigh and cup your jaw softly. He turns your face to inspect it before he brings his other hand which wipes your fringe away from covering any other possible wounds. 

He hums. “Looks like just scratches.” 

The mystery box turns out to be a first aid kit. Miguel flicks it open and rummages around in it before he pulls a couple of bottles and bandages out. 

“Take off your suit top, we need to treat that burn before it gets worse.” He demands. You cough before awkwardly peeling off what's left of your suit before dropping it on the carpeted floor. You need to get that repaired.

You couldn't bear to meet Miguel's eyes. Not when he’s kneeled in front of you, his usually intimidating body looking small as he’s hunched over. He looks tired, his frown is a mixture of worry and annoyance, but there is something beneath it. Something you don't dare to think about but you know. You always knew. From the first day, you finally managed to see that crack in Miguel’s hardened exterior, you’ve been scared to make another move toward him. Behind this wall of a man, is a heart guarded with spikes and what he has in his eyes right now as he’s wrapping a cooling pad around your arm is something that petrifies you. 

“Next time you’ll be doing missions with me and me only. I won't be assigning you to any other spiders until you learn to take care of yourself,” He huffs, unveiling another roll of bandages.  He pulls at your shoulder which makes you turn slightly. 

"Fucking hell, ¿cómo puedes ser tan descuidado? You run around saving everyone else but who’s going to save you, huh?" He huffs, wrapping the last of the bandage slightly too tight which makes you wince. He notices but does nothing. 

Once again, he holds your chin between his fingers as your gazes suddenly meet. Miguel growls with how you won't meet his eyes, firmly pointed anywhere but into Miguel’s red eyes. He sighs before letting you go as he takes out some ointments. He puts the substance on your cheek and under your slowly blackening eye, then down your jaw where you know a pretty bad bruise taints your skin. You feel his movement slow before his hand rests on your nape, sending jolts of warmth through your body.

“Cuídate, ¿eh? Cuídate." His voice devastatingly soft. 

Confusion and a steady wave of feelings start at the bottom of your heart, which only worsens as you finally find the courage to look at Miguel. To your surprise, his eyes are wider than usual, pools of crimson oozing with care as he scans your features. His thumb rubs at the base of your skull. “I can't lose my right-hand man.” 

He sighs. “Please, necesito que estés seguro por mí,"

You inhale sharply. Without realizing it, he's practically inches away from you. Your heart races, beats out of your control when Miguel rubs your nape again. 

“Miguel…?” 

A beat passes. Silence. 

Before Miguel growls roughly and promptly stands, taking the med kit with him. He makes his way to what you assume was his wardrobe. Panic rises beside you, making you wave around your hands. “I- Um- Miguel please I didn't mean to- Oof!”

Something was thrown at you. Something soft and large and is this hit shirt and… boxers?! 

“Change your clothes. You can't sleep in those.” Miguel points out, his scowl now a pout on his lips. 

“But-”

“I'm not saying this twice.” He growls before he slides into the bathroom and leaves you in his bedroom along with the pile of his clothes in your arms. 

You slowly look down at what you're holding. Carefully, you slide off what's left of your suit and drop them in a discarded pile before pulling on Miguel's clothes. To no one's surprise, you're practically drowning in the shirt. His boxers barrel fits you and the first goes over your tighs easily. You feel smaller even for your height and stature, but it feels… safe. 

The door of the bathroom slides open to reveal Miguel standing with slightly damp hair as he's drying it off with a towel and in nothing but gray sweats. Something grows within you and it’s definitely something else besides your heart. 

“Ah, you're done,” He glances toward you before setting the towel down neatly. He saunters to the side of his large bed, pulling the covers off before sliding in. An arm keeps the cover slightly open, before he raises an obvious brow.

“Get in here and sleep,” He huffs. 

You jump and quickly slide beside Miguel, careful to keep an inch of a distance. But that was deemed unsuccessful when the man beside you pulled you to his side, and his arm wrapped protectively around your middle which made you drape your hand over his chest. Before you can squirm, he locks his chin over your head with a content sigh. 

Shit, he really is a giant lion. You sigh. 

“Sleep. You need your rest to heal.” Miguel’s voice purrs through you while you're practically glued to his side. You chuckle slightly before pressing a peck just below his jaw.

“You sleep too.” You smile. “Good night Miguel.” 

You hear Miguel hum before he presses his lips to your crown. “Good night.” 

Translations:

how can you be so careless? = cómo puedes ser tan descuidado

Take care, huh? Take care of yourself. = Cuídate, ¿eh? Cuídate.

I need you to be safe for me, = necesito que estés seguro por mí,

Reblogs are appreciated <3

[paper-mache-stars]

Abyssweek Day 4: Revitalize / recovery / "I'm feeling better now!"

Sometimes you need two healers to patch up your swordsmen.

Anything to help Glassy Guy make it through a boss fight!

[asterekmess]

honestly, my fury at the lack of werewolf culture/history/worldbuilding is worthy of its own post. Let me know if by some ungodly chance, you actually wanna hear my thoughts on it // Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!

ohmygod yes, pls, enable me.

SO.

I think I mentioned b4 that Teen Wolf hates werewolves.

This is a show about werewolves like, yeah, sure, they do other plots and stuff. But the main character is a werewolf. The vast majority of the cast are werewolves (at least in the first half of the show). But think about it. What do we actually know about werewolves? They uhh, they shift on the full moon. But like, what about the full moon? Cus’ Scott gets handcuffed to a radiator and he doesn’t shift and break out until the moon comes out from behind the clouds and he screams like it’s excruciatingly painful for him. But then Derek and his Betas are underground during their full moon, and they shift like it’s all fine and dandy (they’re furious, but there’s no pain) and it doesn’t matter whether they can see the moon or not. They, uhh, they’re allergic to wolfsbane/it’s poisonous to them (btw it’s poisonous to literally everyone, just the scent of it is enough to cause seizures and hallucinations in humans. It’s a whole other frustration that they won’t make up their fucking minds abt it. It’s one thing to say that this is some parallel universe where wolfsbane doesn’t poison humans (bc lydia makes them hallucinate with the punch but injesting that much wolfsbane should kill you, and Stiles straight pulls a plant out of the ground; should’ve caused itching, burning, a cough, nausea, fever, headache and More hallucinations) and yet Jackson has to see a doctor and gets told he’s got Aconite Poisoning. So WHAT IS THE TRUTH?) but apparently not enough for Derek not to be able to plant a wolfsbane plant and massive cord of roots (which he would’ve had to tie together himself) in a revenge spiral around Laura’s body. But just being around it causes wolves to lose control. But also there’s supposed to be different strains that do different things? And also sometimes you burn the wolfsbane and it becomes the cure, or you have to burn it out of them or you just cut it out of them? Make UP Your MIND or at least ACKNOWLEDGE that different strains do different things. They get stronger on a full moon. But does that mean they get infinitely stronger with every full moon they experience? Does that mean they get weaker during new moons? They’re stronger in packs. Okay, but they never establish what the fuck a pack is. Is it an agreement? Is it a magical bond? Scott just sort of says people are in his pack. Does that mean they are? Do the humans he knows make him stronger? Just how strong is this bond? Derek makes a claim that “You have your own pack now” so is that a joke, was he mocking scott? Or is he saying that there’s no need for an Alpha and just being a beta with some friends counts as a pack? Apparently they have some kind of...animal magnetism or mind control? Derek uses a funny voice and a guy wakes up from a near coma to look at him with seemingly no control. Peter can force Scott to shift up. Derek forces Isaac to shift down. Derek has an insane amount of control over dogs and makes one lose its fucking mind from like a hundred feet away? Scott makes one calm down, but derek sends attack dogs running with their tails between their legs. Is it actual control or is it just a persuasion? Is it just intimidation? I haven’t even gotten to culture. You’re telling me that we get an entire episode of Allison discovering the entire story behind the Argent clan’s origins as werewolf hunters, why they started, how her name means Silver and apparently that’s where the entire myth of silver hurting werewolves comes from, but we don’t get to know anything about the first werewolves? Where they come from? If they’re a form of evolution or just straight magic or if it’s a curse or a gift from the gods? There’s an entire hidden werewolf population with packs all over the world, but somehow there’s literally no wolf culture? No moon worship? No specific terminology (Alpha, Beta, and Omega are terms used by a really fucking stupid biologist who studied frantic wolves in captivity and cast aspersions on the entire species. He’s been disproven a Thousand Times. NONE of that Alpha, Beta, Omega shit is right. Packs aren’t Hierarchies of Dominance. They’re families. They’re led by two wolves, yes, an “alpha pair” that’s literally JUST THE PARENTS. THE ‘BETAS’ ARE THEIR KIDS. This terminology makes sense if used by HUNTERS who consider werewolves to be mindless dumb animals. WHY THE FUCK would werewolves use it to DESCRIBE THEMSELVES?) besides the absolute minimum of ‘I caught a scent?’ Are you serious? Then there’s werewolf ages. Oh my god that was so fucking lazy. Saying that werewolves don’t age like humans, but that Cora is seventeen “by human standards” WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? I’ve seen theories that go so many different ways. The idea that Werewolves live really long lives because of the superhealing. The idea that they live really short lives because their healing just burns through their body really quickly. The idea that their lifespan is directly correlated to the amount of damage they take because they can only heal so much, so wolves who get hurt a lot age faster than wolves who don’t. There’s NO explanation! You’d think it might be an interesting point for Scott to find out that he’s gonna live to fucking 200 years old. (How old is Satomi again?) That sounds like something a Teenager would be daunted by. We see them make fun of Stiles a few times because he believes werewolf myths about silver, and then because he believes Peter when Peter tells him he lives in a series of underground caves. But like...why not? THESE ARE WEREWOLVES why did you just make them humans with extra facial hair? Where are the traditional mating rituals (or even the concept of a mate/life partner, can you imagine how interesting that would’ve been? If Scott found out Allison was his mate? Or if he suddenly had all these weird urges around her, like rubbing their foreheads together or cuddling her way too much or wanting to bring her food? That would’ve been fascinating and hilarious as subplots for their romance!) where are the full moon runs or pack get-togethers? Where are the aversions to perfumes or cologne? Where are literally any animal behaviors besides AGGRESSION? Where is the den-making? Can werewolves eat fast food or does the grease bug them? Talia was a famous Alpha bc she could full shift. Does anyone know why she could do that? “Evolution” is a bullshit answer, let’s be real. It’s shitty writing and it put Derek through so much more than he deserved. THEY ACCIDENTALLY ESTABLISHED that ALL HALES can full-shift! IT’s NOT EVOLUTION. It’s BIRTHRIGHT. Talia fullshifted. Peter full-shifted (though his was distorted into the monster thingy. That wasn’t anything like Deucalion’s shift. It was a FULL SHIFT) Laura could full shift bc she did it after she died. No other werewolves on the show turned into full wolves after death, even if they died with wolfsbane in their system? MALIA could full-shift into a coyote. LITERALLY EVERY HALE except Cora and that’s bc she got booted back to South America COuld FULL SHIFT (and it never happened after they lost all of their wolf powers, that coud’ve been an interesting plot if they didn’t FUCK IT UP.) But still there’s no explanation, or even just acknowledgement? You don’t have to spell it out for us, but at least SAY “Hey, so the Hale family is really powerful and all of us can full-shift. Not sure why, but it’s neat.) I’m still stuck on rituals. Routines. Werewolf mores. Social cues. Are there certain smells they’re supposed to ignore? Is it polite to pretend you don’t hear someone coming up to your house until they knock? Do they have rules about waiting until the Alpha eats before they start eating (much like how lots of traditional households wait for the father to dig in, or whoever is head of household)? Is it tradition to homeschool werewolves for the first few years until they learn control? Are there seriously no rules about biting humans? You don’t have to talk to their parents or have a specific conversation with them? And if werewolves are so dominance/hierarchy based, then you’re telling me there’s no “second-in-command” or respectful greetings that are supposed to be used for an Alpha? There’s absolutely no form of werewolf government or ancient laws or anything except a big spiral that is universally recognized as a sign you’re gonna kill people? What was the wolfsbane around Laura’s body for? Why make the spiral out of that instead of just drawing in the dirt or something? We make a lot of jokes about Derek being bad with his words, but so is Peter and so is Cora. And they’re the only born wolves we interact with (except Satomi who ALSO isn’t a chatterbox) What if that’s not just because they’re all traumatized and cranky? What if they’re just speaking on a different level? Scents and body language are integral to wolf interaction. Like how we say that Peter has that conversation with Derek’s eyebrows? What if Derek’s so fucking pissed all the time because he hates talking to Scott because SCott ISN”T LISTENING to his body language and scent and chemosignals? He tells Scott to use all his senses, and Scott does it fucking once to say that Peter felt “Angry” and never again. What if Derek is Talking PLENTY (with his body and movements and reactions) but Scott just isn’t paying attention? Isaac seems to understand Derek just fine. Erica and Boyd never complain that Derek is lying to them or ‘keeping something’ from them? What if the reason Scott always thinks Derek’s hiding something is because he isn’t reading the rest of Derek’s conversation and he assumes that the empty feeling is Derek lying. Even STILES seems to understand Derek. He’s human, but he goes totally wolfy. He already uses body language a lot and while he gets mad at Derek he never has to ask what the fuck derek is saying or what he’s holding back. I digress. I wanna know why no other packs came to help Derek and Laura after their family died. I wanna know why Emissaries and Druids are so incredibly important to the supernatural/werewolf world but Derek barely knew they existed (Especially when it’s established that he know tons of lore about other species.) and even though every single pack should have an emissary, they never handle who is the emissary for Derek’s pack or for Scott’s pack (Once again, is an emissary bound to their pack somehow or is it just an agreement?). I wanna know why Derek knew Satomi and trusted her but for some reason never felt like he could ask her for help? Centuries of hiding and living amongst humans with almost no wolf behavior to their name, but none of these packs interact? There’s Druid Vets and Hunter cops and Emissary counselors. But no werewolf doctors? No werewolf teachers? Absolutely no werewolf society? If Derek was worried about Paige not accepting that he was a werewolf unless she became one, what does that say about his experience with humans? He says “there were people in my family that were perfectly ordinary in that house” who died in the fire. But wouldn’t he talk to a human pack member about his worries, if he had one? Or even a bitten pack member? He admits he doesn’t know how to train a Bitten wolf. He’s never been called out by a human pack member for using phrases like ‘caught a scent’ or for reacting to things he shouldn’t. Does this mean Derek’s family was entirely werewolves? No humans in the know? No bitten wolves? He has a huge thing about keeping the secret and never letting anyone in on it unless they get dragged into it. Did Derek’s pack have some kind of prejudice against humans? Was Derek raised to believe humans were weak or cowardly or something, that he thought this beautiful girl would automatically hate him and expose him if she were to discover the supernatural without being forced into silence by self-preservation.

Lots of times, it’s easy to forget in this fandom that so much is missing, because we’ve been filling in the gaps for so long that some stuff is practically canon. It’s generally assumed that the Hales were homeschooled before high school. It’s generally assumed that there’s some kind of bond that marks people as pack. We instinctively add in mentions of Scent and the use of the shift (growling, claws, a hint of fang, flashing eyes) as part of the casual communication between characters. We add in scent-marking and territory boundaries and specific roles in the pack. We do all of that and never think twice because it’s already in all the fic. But we did that. The show gave us nothing. It spent an entire season talking about the nogitsune and the oni and how they’re summoned and what kitsune fox tails are for, but we never got to find out why wolves can do the pain-drain (or even if it dissipates the pain or just transfers it to the wolf doing the draining) or if Derek Hale EVEN HAS A DAD.

[esseastri]

Megan Reads Oathbringer (part 4)

sometimes I wonder about labeling the parts of the liveblog with “part 1, part 2, etc” ‘cause like...that doesn’t mean it’s part 4 of the book. just part 4 of the liveblog? idk, I jUST realized that might be confusing in a book split up into five parts, but it’s too late now...

I’m still in part one, for those keeping track.

Part 4 encompasses pages 240-326 (previous parts)

I genuinely cannot imagine Dalinar marrying someone quiet and shy and it’s just. wild.

“his bracer clocks” bless Navani for inventing wrist watches and calling them something delightful instead

nooooooo don’t bring Taravangian here!!!! Don’t let him see the center of your power!

crap, now we’ve got, like...all the factions together, right? Taravangian and the diagram people. the Ghostbloods. Amaram and whatever he’s doing. And us....everyone who knows stuff about the end of the world, all in one convenient place. What could possibly go wrong?

Oh, except Jasnah. She’s out there, somewhere. When will my love return from the war

seriously, it’s been 240 pages, where is Jasnah.

“He’d been a friend to Gavilar and that was enough for Dalinar.” like. okay. sure. but you know your brother was trying to end the world to bring back the gods, right? like? ARGH.

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm hey do we have a way to tell Radiants from normal Shardblade holders?

I’m not saying I don’t trust Taravangian and his “newest Radiant” Malata, but... I DON’T TRUST TARAVANGIAN AND HIS NEWEST RADIANT MALATA

seriously, what is in Kholinar that all the parshmen are headed there? or...being driven there by their weird glow spren?

“Men of blood and sorrow don’t get an ending like that.” DAMN STRAIGHT THEY DON’T, YOU MURDEROUS CURMUDGEON

mmmmm she’s a Dustbringer? Our first one... “I don’t like how she smiles.” same though? I’m. concern.

oohh, I didn’t even think she might have an honorblade. where would Taravangian have gotten another honorblade. I remember reading something about there being more honorblades out and about in the world, but we don’t know whose, do we?

I. Am. Concern.

...........it’s not the bond. #confirmed by the stormfather. so there goes my theory about the the stormlight healing Dalinar’s memories.... hm

Taravangian getting all self-righteous about the Shin “murderering all those monarchs” like. even on a not-so-smart day he’s clever enough to deflect blame, to reinforce the idea that he’s just a harmless old man, would never command an assassin to kill off everyone’s kings. He’s terrifying, tbh.

mmmm, everyone thinking Dalinar is gonna attack them, I mean...good assumption but for once, you’re wrong!

omg

Dalinar, please, please do not go to war with the whole world all at the same time. Please.

I...don’t think that’s a spren...I don’t know what it is, but I don’t think it’s a spren. unless...can cities have spren? There are enough people, right? Can they manifest an incarnation of themselves? That’s basically what spren are, right? forces of nature made manifest, so...why not forces of civilization, too?

oh god

how long has it been alone?

this......is another story I wrote because it was sad, not because I wanted it. oh god. ooohh god. Urithiru...

OH ROCK!! ARE YOU OAK--okay, he’s okay.

wait

so it’s not just murders...it’s any sort of violence? the copycat is copying...all violence? or...just the criminal kind? surely it’s not copying all the violence of the army training or sparring. But...why? what’s to be gained from repeating the same crime a second time?

how long has this spren been alone and how mad is it?

does it think...violence is the way to be more human? to remember more? I’m...concerned and confused and. aaahhhhh

“Let me be stronger than those who would kill me.” punk!Dalinar, pls. you can pray for better things than that...

Dalinar keeping Navani’s prayer in his pocket like...my dude u r gettin married. the pining is. wow.

umm. #y i k e s

no wonder Kadash goes and joins the ardents...

Dalinar just...murdering a hundred people including some of his own men? is? really...like, okay, here’s the thing: We knew from the previous two books that Dalinar had done some bad shit. And we were told repeatedly that he’d changed dramatically. But being told and having it spelled out in...child murdering and unthinking friendly fire is...something else. The character development of this man is wild. and mildly uncomfortable. Like...his bad shit wasn’t just a few battles and some brutality of conquest. this was. really, really bad shit. And to see how far he’s come and how much he’s trying to atone for is. sure a thing.

and somehow people DIDN’T figure out that the Thrill is bad before now???

“This is a mercy” ARE YOU SURE?

AND THEN HE JUST GOES AND KILLS SOME MORE, JUST FOR FUNSIES

BUDDY. MY DUDE. YOU NEED TO STOP AND RECONSIDER YOUR LIFE AND YOUR CHOICES. PLEASE.

seriously, how does anyone think the Thrill is a good thing here.

Shallan really needs to look into her budding multiple personality disorder.

OKay, but are they siding with “the enemy” or are they siding with some parshmen who are now in workform and just want to be treated as real people instead of slaves? ‘cause like...you guys are all basing your strategy on the idea that EVERY parshman went stormform and started rampaging about killing everything in sight. And that definitely hasn’t happened yet.

Why hasn’t Kaladin mentioned this to you guys?? like?? oh, I guess he got his spanreed stolen, right? I just....... there’s a lot going on here, but there’s a certain amount of...maybe consider what the negotiations with the parshendi/parshmen/whatever they are now really are before you just...write them all off as evil?

Then again, these are Alethi lighteyes, who don’t really understand the concept of not generalizing a population they consider below themselves.

this is why the whole dudes not writing thing is ssooooooooo stupiiidddd. Kaladin can’t tell you guys ANYTHING unless he finds a nice lady to scribe for him. God, Vorinism is so stupid sometimes.

“Spark” is a good name for a spren tho, maybe she’s legit? I still don’t trust her. at all.

a flying bridgeman, Shallan, PLEASE

he’s a flying captain of the guard, at the very least.

nooo

NOOO

NO I DON’T WANT THIS

NOW I HAVE TO DEAL WITH FUCKING AMARAM THAT RAT BASTARD ALL THE TIME????? NOOO

NOOOOO

IALAI NO. YOU COULD HAVE JUST TAKEN OVER YOU’RE SMART ENOUGH YOU COULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST HIGHPRINCESS AND IT WOULD HAVE BEEN AWFUL BUT ALSO AWESOME BUT NO. NO YOU HAD TO JUST DRAG FUCKING AMARAM THAT RAT BASTARD INTO THIS.

I DON’T WANT THIS TAKE IT BACK, BRANDON.

“Highprince.” “Highprince.” “Bastard.” GOD BLESS ADOLIN, BOY WONDER.

oohhhhhh Adooolliinn. babe, you can’t just--okay. there is is. The Thing.

Shallan. “Oh.” UH HUH. OKAY THEN. SO MUCH FOR THAT SECRET though it wasn’t really a secret. just a miscommunication. but still. I sort of wish that Kaladin had been able to tell Shallan himself about Helaran--though, he still didn’t know it was Helaran.

But there would have been something satisfying in that being just...between the two of them. Them working that out and him probably apologizing and her probably not forgiving him and there would just be. delightful angst before they eventually decided to be friends. But Adolin telling her gives her time to prepare, I guess? for seeing Kaladin again? I still don’t think she’s going to forgive him which will make for veerryyy interesting dynamics when he returns.

Listen, I just really wanted Shallan to pull her Blade on Kaladin, and have him trying to avoid her attacks while apologizing a lot even though he was perfectly in his rights to defend his at-the-time commanding officer from a threat. That would have been delicious angst.

Hopefully she doesn’t hate Adolin for being the messenger, though...

“Everything would have been better off if he’d just let Amaram die.” TRUER WORDS, ADOLIN. tbh, how much do you think Kaladin thinks about that very exact same thought? The answer is: A FREAKING LOT

well, shit. destroying the Oathgate seems a reasonable option, but also it’s gonna make saving the world a heck of a lot harder...

I wonder...if they’d had literally anyone else do the negotiations, if this would be going differently. People know Dalinar, they know he’s the Blackthorn, or used to be, and they don’t know him well enough to know how much he’s changed. If the Blackthorn had come to me and been like, “yo, I want to open a portal to your city center and send you soldiers to help you rebuild” I would ALSO assume he was going to invade my city and try to conquer me and I would also refuse him. But like...if Shallan or someone completely unconnected had tried, I’d be a little more likely? to agree? Idk I feel like they are definitely being hindered by Dalinar’s reputation here.

Just don’t let Taravangian do it. Don’t let him do anything. Oh god.

“a unified Vorin coalition” OH GOOD NOW IT’S A RELIGIOUS WAR. or an Inquisition. Nobody expects the Vorin Inquisition.

I love that Dalinar just....knows how to do shit. Like, Kaladin and Shallan have been practicing and had training sessions with their spren to figure out their powers and even Lift is REALLY BAD at Friction, and Dalinar’s just like. Adhesion. Got it. No problem.

aaaAAAHHH Dalinar holding Oathbringer again and it’s...not screaming it’s whimpering and I’M. SAD. ABOUT A SWORD. DANGIT.

DON’T GIVE HIM THE SWORD. AMARAM DOESN’T DESERVE A SWORD. DON’T DO THAT

okay, but Amaram calling Dalinar a hypocrite is like... POTS AND KETTLES, MY DUDE.

Taravangian: “I sound like a madman, don’t I?” No, you sound like a man for whom the ends justify the means.

Here’s the thing: I see the practicality in Taravangian’s stance. There’s always a practicality in sacrificing a few good ones to get rid of all the bad ones. And yeah, Dalinar’s desire to always save all the good ones, even if it means sparing the bad ones, is just a tad idealistic. But that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try. Idealism is never something that we should give up on, is never something we should ignore or stop working towards. We shouldn’t always have to settle for practicality.

hoooo cool. The Stormfather can just...send Dalinar to other people in visions wth that’s really cool. Like a Kyprioth/Aly situation except the destination person knows they’re there.

“Shallan had nothing to do, but Veil was useful.” No, Shallan. You’re useful. You are Veil. It’s not. It’s not a different person. It’s just you adsfghjkl just. YOU’RE ALICE, PARKER. GOD.

“Veil liked watching people. She shared that with Shallan.” THAT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE THE SAME PERSON. YOU ARE ALICE.

omg, I love that Pattern just...brought both Kholin bros and all of Bridge Four.

“go do something stupid without letting me watch” OMG PATTERN, BBY.

I have missed Bridge Four, hello darlings

THEY’RE JOKING WITH RENARIN AND HE’S SMILING AND THEY’RE FRIENDS AND I’M SO HAPPY AAHH

THIS IS SO CUTE I LOVE THEM AAH

omg, I didn’t realize there was a staircase, I thought they were just going to be jumping into a void.

dear god, roshar has a Sisyphus equivalent that’s delightful.

sooo, I’m assuming that’s...Odium, Honor, and Cultivation in those mosaics? I’m genuinely amused that Shallan thinks they’re “pagan symbols”

Bridge Four took point even though there were two Shardbearers and an extra Radiant and MY BBYS I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

NOPE

NOPPPPPEEEE

NOOOOOOOOOOPPPEEEEE

DON’t DIE?

DON’T DIIIIIIEEEE

I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS HORROR NOVEL SHIT

NOOOOPE

ADOLIN NO! YOU STORMING FOOL DO NOT CHARGE THE DARKNESS UNMADE EVIL THING WHAT THE FUCK NO

NOOO

I’M OUT

BYE

if any of Bridge Four die, so help me, I will drive back to Utah and yell at Brandon personally. To his face.

NOOOPPE THIS IS CREEEEPPY AS FUUUCKK WHAT THE NOPE

ooohh Renarin’s a good, he’s healing them, that’s my boy

okay, the illusory army is preTTY DANG COOL GET IT GIRL

but also the Unmade thing is freaking terrifying and I’m nope

...I’m assuming that since Dalinar saw nine shadows and the champion that there’s one Unmade for each of the ten orders of Radiants? LIke, this one, the Midnight Mother can be directly countered by Lightweaving. So maybe another one is designed to be defeated by Windrunners or Elsecallers or whatever. And it’s one for each?

I genuinely love that the new Radiant’s don’t call their swords Shardblades. It’s Sylblade, Glysblade, Patternblade. I love it.

“Adolin [...] charged into the room, bursting right through the middle of an illusion of his father.” Well, ain’t that just storming appropriate. How beautifully poetic.

also, Adolin and Renarin fighting back to back is A LOT AND I’M LOVE THEM

ooohh my god, it’s trying to bond with her?? trying to rip Pattern away and bond with her that’s... YIKES.

oohhh shit....corrupted creationspren. ooohhhh my god.

Odium, why you gotta ruin everything good in this world, you jerk

ooh...it was...bound. by a Lightweaver. bound like the Parshendi’s gods? like the parshmen? how are we binding people? I’m getting the idea that maybe binding people is bad.

I’m getting the idea that Ishar is bad. but that’s a theory for another time.

okay, so...the pashmen weren’t...going to Kholinar. they were going to a tiny city a week’s walk from Hearthstone...to...besiege it? why

what. is. happening.

also omg Kaladin’s never been to a real city, someone take this child on a sightseeing vacation, asap.

how...did they take the city and what...are they gonna do with it?? I’m all for giving them land and lives but I’m worried about stormform. and voidbringers. and a lot of things.

the parshmen calling him Kal is murdering my soul

oooh noooooooooo there’s a highstorm coming and the people are all outside and the parshmen are camping, and I...am worried.

Yixli? that’s a terrible name. though I guess she’s a questionably evil spren of odium, so.

Fused? okay, that’s a fun word for Stormform.

Kal, babe, you need to get out of there.

Ah. Good choice.

Syl whacking at the gloryspren and telling them “Mine!” about Kaladin is FRIKKIN ADORABLE HI I LOVE SYL

of course it’s all perception, Kaladin, everything is different if you change your point of view. That’s what makes being a person so difficult.

“Treat them better than they treated you.” AMEN. THAT’S THE ONLY WAY THINGS GET BETTER.

it’s hard and it sucks a lot, but it’s the only way.

oh shit

oh sHIT

what. dark stormlight? what the?

SHIT

THERE’S LIKE, THREE OF THEM?

okay, only two. buT STILL

Why can they do Lashings? do sotrmform voidbringers whatever the fuck they are have Radiant orders too? WHAT IS HAPPENING

“You can’t save all of them.” BUT HE’S DAMN WELL GOING TO TRY

HE’S SO GOOD

SO GOOD

WHAT

WHAT

THAT’S?? MAGICAL. WHAT. MAGIC WINDSPREN SHIELD????? CAN HE DO THIS NORMALLY OR IS THE STORMFATHER HELPING OR?? WHAT

omg, just...deposit him in front of Urithiru. That’s convenient. Why thanks.

YAAAASSSS

SHE’S HERE!!!!!

SHE’S BACK!!!!!!!!!

SHE’S HEEERRRREEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YEESSSSSS

me: can I squeeze the interludes onto this part of liveblog? also me: *scrolls up to the top of this post forever me: Maaayyybe not.

[authenticaussie]

Coffeshop au vs Fake marriage au vs Lady and Knight au vs Hogwarts au

aWWW man haha a big 4v4 going on,,,Damnnn. Okay okay so I love fake marriage aus man, just fake dating and anything is so good because of all of the pinning oh man it’s perfect. But then again!!! Anything that comes of a Lady & Knight au is just….perfect. All the time. Because you can have starts-off-as-betrayal-turns-into-utter-loyalty, or you can just have starts as loyalty and adventures and dragons and magic and!!! Oh boy just so cool so cool

Lady & Knight AU Headcanons:

For a betrayal au!!! Nam/Tash would be so good because you have royal lady Nami who’s adopted by Arlong and raised to be a selling point, basically, she always knew she was just going to get married off once she stopped being useful, so she decides to sell the whole kingdom out. 

Except when Arlong sends her capital she gets assigned this super-fucking-cute personal guard and she’s like shit I’m too gay for this. And Tashigi is at first a bit standoffish ‘cause she’s like that with everyone but just??? They end up being friends??? And Nami’s plan to betray the kingdom and go back to her rightful home starts falling to the wayside because she doesn’t want to betray Tashigi??

And Tashigi loves this place, loves the kingdom and capital and every person in it, and always helps out in town whenever Nami decides she wants to go out and just. 

God kill me okay I am 100% here for Nami seeing cruelty in everyone but Tashigi is just so-

Good. So heroic and kind and strong and Nami’s always been weak for loyalty ‘cause she’s never had it

Nami ends up confessing her plans to Tashigi but then saying she knew how to fix it and didn’t want to go through with it and Tashigi kiiiind of doesn’t believe her??? And she turns standoffish again and so cold, but she promises not to tell anyone, and Nami’s like fuck I gotta get her trust back i miss her so much—

And so Nami ends up twisting her plans and making it look like Arlong was blackmailing her and that it was his plans, ‘cause he wasn’t popular at court, and basically does this super clever coup and takes over his whole enterouge and deposing him as duke (or whatever tf he would be ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

And arlong finds out that she betrayed him and so sends people to kill her but then Tashigi busts in and totally does awesome sword fighting and saves her life and they talk it over and be honest and just. Happily ever after ;u; 

And for the loyal af I’m gonna do Robin and Koala ‘cause it’s just so flippin’ cute

There was a coup when Robin was younger and the whole royal family was murdered but lil!Koala helped her sneak away and worked in the kitchens and gave information to the rebels, and she was so young, but so strong, and helped the rebellion take back Robin’s kingdom, and so in return Robin asked her what she wanted and Koala said that all she wanted was to be able to protect Robin. (Cue flustered and barely hiding it Robin, and utterly oblivious young koala)

Robin as this elegant and poised and utterly (literally) magical lady and Koala’s been head over heels for her for the longest time, ever since she was a page and saw Robin (as a teen) with her head held high and her voice so calm and strong as she dismissed warriors to help fight bandits and take care of her kingdom.

Before Robin’s coronation she’s meant to visit every single village and know the people and work with her land so she can understand what they live like and go through but Koala’s super worried because even though Robin is a powerful witch there’s still ways to get her and begs to accompany her

And Robin acquiesces (and is actually secretly super happy that Koala still cares enough to want to protect her, because a lot of other people see her as scary and cold and strange and she doesn’t mind, but sometimes it gets lonely)

Koala totally braids Robin’s hair at one point!!!! Because it was getting in the way and Robin was getting annoyed!!! And then agrees to do it for the rest of the trip!!!! And she dies inside because Robin is so beautiful and she loves her so fucking much!!!!!!

God okay kill me

They end up camping together on the road and it’s basically just domesticity and protecting each other and taking care of each other and Robin confides softly some of her fears of being queen and koala almost half-confesses that she’s worried one day they’ll be things she can’t protect anyone from

Their first kiss is totally in a waterfall. 

I don’t know why that thought occured to me but now that it has I can’t let it go

They get attacked by bandits and Koala fights them all off but ends up getting injured. And so they camp by this waterfall that opens into this really lovely cave system that’s lit by shards of glowing blue and purple crystal that Robin found ‘cause it’d help her healing magic (which she isn’t suuuuuper good at, ‘cause healing magic is innate and Robin is more of a learned witch, and has heaps of memorised spells, but isn’t good at just shoving raw power at a thing).

And in the soft glow of these crystals and she’s patching up Koala’s side she just…..Ends up tugging Koala’s chin and pressing a kiss to her lips and Koala’s like lajkhdgj holy FUCK

And she tries to kiss back properly but then ends up wincing and going all ow ow ow fuck that hurt

And Robin laughs and Koala’s like aw come on that’s not my fault. And basically ends up saying something about how she’s wanted to do that for ages is it her fault that she wants more than just one kiss???

And Robin’s like woah. excuse me, wait, what.

And Koala starts blushing furiously and gets super flustered and is spluttering and trying to explain and Robin just thinks it over while she’s spluttering and is like “So you…have loved me? For a long time?”

And Koala just ends up nodding kind of guilty but then Robin smiles at her and Koala’s fucking wrecked and Robin just says “Good,” and kisses her again!!!

And no misunderstandings occur and they keep travelling around just this time with  kisses and more affection and Koala not feeling careful around what she’s allowed to do, ‘cause before she didn’t feel like she could / should touch Robin and now finds out Robin fucking loves all the attention Koala gives her 

GOD IT’S SO CUTE!!!!

And when they get back and Robin is crowned it’s basically a fact that Koala is the kingdom’s other queen and when people on Robin’s council complain and says she needs to get married ‘cause she shouldn’t be queen without a king she just laughs in their face. 

She’s not 100% comfortable with being a mom, because she doesn’t remember much about her mom, ‘cause she died when Robin was so young and she was always so busy with being Queen, but Koala would love a kid, and she needs an heir….

(Little does she know that she’s already accidentally adopted all of the orphaned children in the castle, who she visits regularly and tells wonderful stories about the adventures she and Koala had and supports and helps with jobs and teaching and she gives them books and like okay these like 10 kids all see her and Koala as their moms)

But she needs a biological kid apparently (she’s contemplated firing this council, they’re fucking dumbasses) so she makes a kid and the kid has magic and there’s dorky magical shenanigans as she tries to get used to the fact that someone calls her mother and means it and Koala’s like Robin, pls, you’ve been looking after the castle kids for years why is this weird???

But it’s mine, Robin goes, frazzled, and Koala laughs quietly and soothes her with kisses and they raise this kickass kid and she and Koala live happily ever after. The end!!!!!

Fake Marriage AU Headcanons:

Uhh man tbqh I love fake dating more than I like fake marriages???? Idk why but it proooobably has something to do with my dislike of marriage and the fact that people use it like it’s an end-all-be-all and a solution to every problem imeanwhat???im not cynical

anyway!! I’m a drip for zolu and I haven’t written it for ages, so; 

Zoro runs this lowkey but really strong dojo along with his sister Kuina and they compete a lot in fights, but are confined to the stupid gender bullshit ‘cause Kuina’s dad won’t let her fight any guys. Kuina’s already the strongest female swordsman in the world, and demands that Zoro become the strongest man so they can have a fight and so who’s actually better, and who’s the strongest full stop.

But Zoro can’t beat mihawk. It’s annoying as fuck for him, especially when Mihawk constantly keeps asking when Zoro will find something stronger than his ambitions, when he’ll find something worth fighting for.

One day he finally snaps and points at Luffy, who’s the brother of a friend of a student that attends Kuina’s self defence class and goes, 

“I’M FIGHTING FOR MY FIANCE YOU ASSHOLE”

Luffy’s like wtf. Mihawk’s like ah. Well then. i shall leave you to spend time with your fiance, ‘cause you obviously don’t know well enough what i mean. 

luffy’s still like what the fuck. Mihawk leaves while Zoro’s yelling at him, and then he whirls on Luffy and Luffy’s like akjhjdg dude why are you glaring at me  

Then Kuina busts in and is like YOU HAVE A FIANCE?????

And Koala and Sabo are on her heels and Sabo’s like luffy how the hell did you keep this a secret!!! You’re a shit liar!!!

I- Wha- huh????? goes luffy, and Zoro’s like yep. He is. Fucking shit liar. It was meant to be a surprise but i got so angry at mihawk

WHO THE HELL ARE YOU demands sabo

my. fiance?????? luffy goes’cause he’s confused as all hells, bUT SABO THINKS HE’S CONFUSED AT SABO FOR NOT REALISING IT

There’s a lot of yelling. So much yelling. Luffy has no idea what’s going on. Zoro ends up dragging him away before they leave and kind of explains what’s going on - his rival says he needed something worth fighting for, and movies always say love makes you stronger (”only the cheesy ones,” luffy mumbles, but shuts up when Zoro glares at him, daring him to make another comment)

Luffy doesnt end up agreeing persay, but he doesnt say no either, and so they have to handle the inquisition in the form of friends and family and then find out a lot of the people they know know each other??? and it’s only weird luck they haven’t met before then??? So they just claim that they had met before then, and it’s ridiculous and dorky and they have to answer plans about marriage and where their rings are, and zoro says he didn’t want luffy to loose his and that he was always working and fighting and so they’d agreed not to get rings and

GOD GUYS IT’S A GOOD OL’ CLUSTERFUCK

They end up going on dates where they try and get everything sorted and what they know about each other and luffy keeps making zoro laugh (which is annoying, fucking hell luffy, you’re a dumbass, zoro thinks with a roll of his eyes, but can’t deny that…weirdly enough luffy makes him really happy)

and once their friends know they’re getting married, they get shoved together a lot too, and so they go from not knowing each other very well to just learning so much about each other’s likes and dislikes and they get along really well????? like wtf it’s so weird????/ they just fit. Once Zoro stop acting so put-upon ofc tho (luffy yells at him, and tells him that it was zoro’s fault in the first place that they were stuck in this mess, so how could he get off on being so high and mighty all the time??? and zoro stops acting like a dick)

And their friends are just like oooohhh yeah i can see why you want to marry him now and zoro’s like laskhdgf fucking hell you guys you’re so thick, god i cant believe this is working he thinks as he texts back like 30 seconds after luffy replies, and smiles fondly at all the spelling mistakes and emojis he recieves in return

Finds out that Sabo gives Koala a lift to her self-defence classes and sometimes joins in as a demonstrator for them to practice on and Luffy doesn’t have anyone at home and he gets bored and lonely by himself so he comes along but is banned from the classroom and so Zoro starts teaching luffy how to fight and finds out that Luffy’s actually a good fighter but his basics are off

You know that trope where the characters stand super close to correct each other’s techniques???

Yep. 

yep. 

Zoro you loser. 

And Zoro finds that his fighting has improved as well, ‘cause Luffy’s so wild and unpredictable and he needed a refresher on the basics too.

And one time when they’re sparing Luffy manages to pin him and crows in delight and victory and is sweaty and grins down at him and Zoro’s like

Oh shit.

Oh sweet fucking shit.

SHIT

Welcome to Feelings Town tm, population: one utterly in love Roronoa Zoro who didn’t realise until it was TO FUCKING LATE

the “wedding” date they’d organised dawns nearer (Zoro tried to keep it as small and cheap as possible, ‘cause they’d planned for luffy to leave him at the altar (no way was zoro doing the leaving, everyone would kill him. Luffy is everyone’s sunshine) but luffy has so many fucking friends) and Mihawk agrees to fight zoro before they go on their “honeymoon” and there’s a bunch of people there cheering zoro on and it’s all these friends that he’s made/grown closer  to thanks to Luffy and then just about when he thinks he’s gonna loose there’s luffy, fists clenched, fire alight in his eyes, urging him on, and Zoro’s like fuck

fuck I want to make him proud. i don’t want to see him disappointed. I want to best mihawk and go get fucking married and go on our stupid honeymoon and be

happy

because that’s how he’s felt. He’s felt happy with Luffy. He’s felt so happy with Luffy. 

Kicks mihawk’s ass and drops his sword into Kuina’s hands and bypasses everyone else to wear Luffy is standing and grinning and there’s stars in his eyes and Zoro basically just picks him up and like they’re reading each other’s minds Luffy just leans in and kisses him

It’s fucking perfect.

Zoro’s sweaty and hot and his blood still sings from the fight and it’s rushing in his ears but all he can feel and hear and see is Luffy 

And it’s perfect.

From behind him, Mihawk mumbles, “So you’ve finally found something stronger than ambition.”

Zoro pulls away and leans his forehead against luffy’s and replies, “Don’t go all cheesy family movie on me now, Mihawk.” 

and Luffy laughs and they kiss again and its!!!! so cheesy!!! so cute!!! so good!!!

And they end up putting the marriage off for a bit and dating for a few years but everyone still calls them fiances / the old married couple and one day when they’re sprawled on the couch Zoro just turns to luffy and goes, 

“Hey, do you want to finally actually get married?”

And luffy grins and zoro rolls his eyes and he’s like “yes i get that we practically already are, but I-”

“want to buy you a ring. And that stupid stuff. Alright?”

“Alright,” Luffy goes, still grinning super super wide, “but you might wanna put it on a necklace or smth ‘cause you know im gonna lose it.”

Zoro groans and is like dont i know it. half of our yearly pay’s gonna go to replace ur wedding ring. 

and just!!! laughter and happiness and happily ever after. The end!!!!

[paradisefovnd]

what is something everyone should know about your muses before interacting?

multimuse ask meme accepting

i told vicky to send this to me again bc i’m a dumb and didn’t understand it the first time

ruth balakov  - she is SUPER high energy. if you interact with ruth, expect her to be just short of bouncing off the walls. also, she’s super random, so don’t be surprised if she just rambles on and on about all kinds of random shit

samir chaudhry - this guy may seem immature, but he’s actually very thoughtful and considerate

tutankhamun “tut” mcmullen  - he’s emotional. look up “emo” and there will be a pic of tut. however, he’ll try and hide it if he thinks that his emotions will hurt the other person (well, that’s if he cares about them. if he doesn’t, then he’ll let it all out) 

jughead jones - he’s a little shit. he’s also not the dark and brooding jughead from riverdale. i cannot stress that enough. my jughead is asexual, loves burgers more than life, and doesn’t say shit that sounds like a young chuck palahniuk. instead, he’s more like roald dahl minus a dash of the whimsy

melody valentine - again, she is NOT riverdale based. that’s honestly the most important thing about her and jughead. my melody is sunshine in a person and sings everything she says with the occasional bit of cryptic wisdom

mark darcy - basically, he’s a modern mr. darcy. something to know about him and my portrayal is that i’m probably not going to write him with a lot of people. most of the muse i have for him is when i’m writing him against bridget, and i can’t really change that. he’s deeply in love with her, and ??

choi han-kyul - this kid is the grandson of the chairwoman of a company so like he’s hella rich, and he takes it for granted at first. but then, he’s put in charge of running a coffee shop, and he matures a lot through the process. however, he doesn’t lose his playfulness. he’s honestly one of my favorites, and if anyone ever wanted to write with him, i would be beyond happy. 

dr. noelle akopian - she’s a psychiatrist who’s done with ur shit

greg serrano - self-sabotaging but currently working on improving his life. in business school, used to be a bartender. recovering alcoholic. 

maya - she’s the most pure and pls don’t hurt her

valencia perez - used to be a yoga instructor, but is now an event coordinator. hella gay even tho the show doesn’t admit it. deserves to be appreciated. is working on improving her “mean girl” tendencies. the “mean girl” tendencies tho are partially bc she’s never really had female friends and she just...doesn’t know what to do? she’s actually an awkward bean, but her beauty prevents a lot of ppl from realizing it

johnny castle - soft. again, don’t hurt him. he’s a dance instructor at a resort, but he can work in a lot of different verses. you need a dancer? he’s there. he’s very serious about his craft, and is a genuine human being. he appreciates honesty. 

blair warner - she’s rich af and can be super conceited, but she knows how to have a good time and has a little bit of a devious streak. depending on the verse - is either in law school or a lawyer. intelligent altho ppl don’t expect it. 

jo polniaczek - looks tough, is a soft. don’t let her leather jacket and motorcycle fool you. jo polniaczek just wants a simple life and she wants people to be happy and respected. respect is big with her. 

emily gilmore - a socialite altho she prefers the term “philanthropist.” emily might seem “evil” to some people, but she has good intentions (in her mind). she only does things when she thinks they’re the “right” thing to do (at least, before the revival), but she also has a bit of a mischievous streak that’ll come along every now and then. her upbringing instilled certain lessons in her that she’s unlearning little by little. 

meredith quill - she loves classic rock, motown, her son, and the world. she’s one of those people who’s in love with life, and her enthusiasm is genuine. 

alice longbottom - she’s kind and altruistic. however, she’s not a pushover. my alice isn’t “soft” alice. she’s “u said something super ignorant and im gonna tell you why youre wrong” alice. gryffindor. 

arthur weasley - arthur wants to learn everything he can about the world around him. a bit of an absent-minded professor, even tho his mind is always turning. he just has so many thoughts happening all at once, he can tend to jump from subject to subject without connecting them sometimes. gryffindor (altho he was almost a ravenclaw)

victoire weasley - read this here

helga g. pataki - helga is someone who came from a bad situation and pretty much raised herself. most of her interactions will be after high school. my headcanon is that she finished school and got a scholarship to ivy league and after that, she went to law school at another ivy. she hopes to be the first female president one day. she’s aggressive, but deep down, she cares a lot. 

effie trinket - seems like an airhead, but effie is smarter than you think. she grew up in a society where certain things were expected so she fulfilled them. her upbringing was also extremely different in the sense that she was fed propaganda from a young age and never knew differently, but her experiences in district 12 (or other verse equivalents) have shown her that the world isn’t what she thought it was, and she’s learning what life actually is little by little 

katniss everdeen - i won’t write katniss a lot just bc it takes me into a place that’s harder to get out of, but my katniss is a sacrifice of her circumstances. she never wanted to be a revolutionary figure and never felt comfortable with her position in it even after the war was over. her “toughness” that people seem to see is just katniss trying to survive. survival is her driving aspect. 

jane villanueva - jane is a mama who is also an incredible writer whose first book is in the process of being published. she writes romance novels so essentially she’s just like us! she likes having a plan for everything, and her family is number ONE in her life

michael cordero a detective. is also a major nerd. thinks he could be a comedian, but he’s not actually that funny. like maybe if you have a certain sense of humor. he lives with a certain code of ethics, however, they might get bent at points if he thinks it’s for the best of the situation. 

rogelio de la vega - telenovela actor. if your character met him on the street, they might not know him if they haven’t watched telenovelas, but he will assume that they know who he is and that he’s famous. SUPER dramatic. don’t be alarmed.  

elle woods - amazing lawyer, loves the color pink, member of delta nu. in my version, i take pieces from the movie and musical. for my elle, vivienne was the one who told her to come back to the case (like in the musical), but at the end, elle doesn’t propose to emmett. instead, she and vivienne start dating and fall in love and get married 

ryan atwood - he came from not a great family, and then he got adopted by this uber rich fam in the oc (orange county, california). he’s navigating his new life, and grappling with who exactly he is and what his place is in the world. just know that he’s deeply loyal and cares a lot about people

pam beesly - receptionist at dunder-mifflin paper company. insecure, but is slowly coming out of her shell. is an artist and outlawed at chili’s. is a huge dork, but also adorable. 

fitzwilliam darcy - super rich bc he inherited everything from his parents after they died. they died when he was young, so he was thrust into responsibility at an early age which is part of why he is the way he is. seems stuck-up (and kind of is), but he just doesn’t care of societal expectations of friendliness even though he gets caught in what society expects when it pertains to manners, etc. is his sister’s guardian, and she means more to him than anything else in the world

jane bennet - pure, the sweetest. the oldest sister of five. in modern verses, i have her as a preschool teacher

queen clarisse renaldi - queen of genovia. a literal queen. tries to be diplomatic. expects people to do as she tells them bc she’s a queen. has dealt with some shit in her life - her husband died, her SON died. tries to stay optimistic. 

sabrina fairchild - suicide attempt tw: her father is a chauffeur for a super rich fam. suffered from depression. attempted suicide, but thankfully, was found before it was too late. after that, she was sent to paris and attended cooking school. fell in love with paris, and also healed. developed a love for life. became a fashion designer. 

capheus onyango - son of a local leader who was murdered when capehus was young. was raised by his mother who he loves more than this earth. spent awhile driving a bus called the “van damme.” is a sensate, meaning he is connected to seven other people. idealistic, kind, and too good for this world. 

princess fiona - i’ll mostly be playing her with a real life fc. she’s a princess, an actual princess, and her parents had her in a tower for years bc there was a spell on her that turned her into an ogre at night. so kinda like the swan princess but instead of a swan, she’s an ogre. black belt. enjoys burping. 

shrek - an ogre, however, if i keep him, ill be playing him mostly with a real life fc. isolated from a young age, had to take care of himself. is insecure because of how he looks and who he is. enjoys burping as well. has layers. 

charles brooks - in charge of a publishing company. divorced. has two daughters. is cautious when entering new relationships because of his position and his family. respectful. intelligent. is finally starting to live life in a way that aligns with what he likes. 

josh - tattoo artist. human golden retriever except more funky. is just trying to enjoy life while he can. definitely a millennial. spontaneous. knows how to have a good time. is super duper loyal and kind.