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yuuji cannot use a chair to save his life
Sukuna was sitting on the floor, his upper arms resting on the couch behind him. His head was tilted to the side as it rested on his fist, and he lazily looked at the screen in front of him.
Yuuji was playing a video game, a "shooter game" with many colors and sounds that looked more like the mess the brat watched on his phone rather than anything coherent. Trying to follow along made Sukuna's head spin but there were a few things that were easy to catch on.
Yuuji's character exploded into a colored puddle, and without missing a beat Sukuna laughed at him. "You suck at this," he added.
Yuuji turned to glare at him, straining his neck while doing so, "I haven't played in months and the other team has a sniper, so if I don't try to move up we're never getting back mid."
He turned back at the sound of his character respawning, "And my team only has short to mid-range weapons so we're at a disadvantage here."
Sukuna couldn't be bothered to understand what any of that meant. "I'm only hearing excuses. If you were actually good at this game of yours you wouldn't need teammates to win."
"It's a multiplier game, having teammates is the whole POINT!" He screamed the last word as he narrowly evaded an attack that would have surely got him killed again, exploding his opponent in the process. His momentary glee was quickly crushed as his character also exploded for seemingly no reason.
Sukuna didn't try to hide his chuckles while the young man anxiously looked at the map while respawning. The match ended before he could get onto the field again.
Despite the general chaos of the game Sukuna only needed one look to know the results. He smiled with all his teeth, poking at Yuuji's temple with his free hand, "Maybe you should give up for now. What is it? The fifth loss in a row?"
"Oh, shut up," he fell back, landing on Sukuna's chest, "I just need to shake the rust off," he closed his eyes for a moment, knowing how to queue for another match without looking.
Sukuna huffed fondly, "You've been saying that for the past 30 minutes, brat."
Yuuji didn't add anything, only pouting a little. He made his character jump up and down with the hand he still had on the controller. Sukuna tightened the arms he had warped around Yuuji's waist, filling the gap until the younger man sat back up for the next match.
.
.
Yuuji was on his phone, checking over his social medias, laughing at memes and catching up with the tea of strangers online while sending out anything interesting to his friends
What had started out as him sitting beside Sukuna was now him halfway over the other man's laps, his upper back and neck held on a massive arm and hand.
Sukuna was reading old history books, saying he wanted to "catch up" to what happened while he was sealed. One time he mentioned to Yuuji how lacking historical records felt compared to the reality of life during his time, but that didn't stop him from reading them; in fact having a basis to compare how things were when he was still alive compared to what was recorded granted him a far better understanding of other recordings, according to him.
Yuuji didn't really get why he'd spend so much time reading from the source when there were so many videos online detailing their country's history. He had provided Sukuna with a phone for that reason but he only used it for 2 weeks before permanently retiring it to a drawer saying that "it was no wonder the brat was so stupid with the amount of trash accessible through that thing”.
Not what Yuuji had expected when Sukuna had spent those 2 weeks with an average of 12 hours of daily screentime, but hey.
While he was scrolling, Yuuji came across something that made him grin. "Hey, old man!"
Sukuna turned one eye to look at him which was enough acknowledgement for Yuuji, "Look at this," he turned his phone to him.
A picture of an adult tiger lying on its side with a cub pawing at its face was shoved into Sukuna's vision. "It's us."
Yuuji was grinning from ear to ear, giggling to himself. He took back his phone after receiving a hum of acknowledgement and they both resumed their respective activity.
Once Yuuji was fully focused on his screen again, Sukuna allowed himself to smile.
.
.
"Are you done showing off?" Yuuji asked annoyed. As his answer, Sukuna pushed back, going from doing push-ups on one hand to one finger and it only pissed off Yuuji even more.
Originally Yuuji was simply working out a little and was joined by Sukuna who not only matched Yuuji's moves but also made a point of one-upping him at every turn.
Yuuji watched from the side as Sukuna finished his set of 1 finger push-ups, wholly unimpressed as he was pretty sure he could do the same.
He simply knew that Sukuna would one-up him again somehow and he didn't want his light work-out session to turn into their usual competitions.
"Is that all you got brat?" Sukuna was smiling with all his teeth, still holding a perfect plank position, "Was such a simple move enough to scar you into surrendering?"
Well, Yuuji couldn't let that slide. "I just think that this was way too easy for you."
Yuuji walked closer and got on Sukuna's back, sitting in the middle of it. He knew that a man who could carry entire buildings wouldn't be bothered by his weight, but he was still annoyed by the fact that the other did not budge. Not even breaking a sweat.
"Is that it?" Sukuna changed the arm holding him and started another set. "This is still a lightwork brat. Unless you also want me to sit on your back as well to see if you can match the strength of a single one of my arms?"
"I can carry you pretty easily you know that?" Yuuji added with a frown.
"I'd love to see this," he added mockingly which only made Yuuji angrier.
The older man finished his set. A bit passed and he eventually laid down on floor, Yuuji still on his back.
"Hey what are you doing now?"
"Given how comfortable you seem up there I have decided to claim victory this time and let you enjoy yourself. How benevolent of me, I know."
Determined not to leave this as a loss, Yuuji got up and immediately deadlifted Sukuna off the ground.
.
.
Most beds weren't comfortable to Sukuna, made in sizes too small for his bulk and extra limbs, yet sometimes he'd ditch the massive one in his room to sleep in Yuuji's.
And what could Yuuji do if he was tired as well? With Sukuna lying on his back, arms splayed open and legs dangling off the edge, there wasn't that much place left for him to sleep on.
Yuuji crawled up the bed and laid directly on Sukuna's chest, hair tickling the bigger man's chin. He wrapped his arms around the other's neck while 2 hands placed themselves on the small of his back. 'For stability' they both thought.
Like this they both drifted to sleep, hearts close to one another and beating in sync to a slow and steady rhythm.
.
.
.
.
On some day they'll go picnicking together, as if they weren't spending enough time with one another.
They ate, they talked, then they both fell silent, a comfortable sensation covering them both as they simply enjoyed each other's presence as well as the nature around them.
Sukuna's head was laid on Yuuji's laps. Gentle fingers ran through his hair and massaged his scalp; the sun kept them warm and a soft breeze rustled the leaves of the trees around them.
Yuuji had already zoned out, moving his hands automatically in a way that felt right to him, whereas Sukuna had started to drift off to sleep.
Small moments of peace they wish could last forever
#sukuita#my post#this one kept me alive for the slowest work day I've ever had#sometimes i feel bad for writing sukuita this soft and fluffy because maybe i should make it more angsty?#but then I remember that I should do everything I want forever#if you're wondering Yuuji's playing splatoon probably 2 or 3 but I haven't set a time period for these snippets#it's entirely possible that yuuji owned a wii u with splat 1 and i can totally see him love this game#5 losses in a row is a very common occurrence (speaking from experience :'))#this is almost a 5+1 fic but I couldn't find a fifth scenario that satisfied me#sukuita in close physical proximity is my favorite flavor of fanart. these stories were inspired from various pieces#I thought about having a section at the end with links to a bunch of fanarts of the same brand but got lazy#just know that they were the inspirations for this#what else... I ran out of creative juices at the end but I'm still mostly satisfied with this#please notify me of any mistakes and thank you for reading <3
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Unwanted: Chapter 18, Unread - Pt. 3
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader
Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, betrayal, mentions of sex, mentions of violence, threats.
Word Count: 1.9k
Previously On...: You saw something on Bucky's phone that changed everything.
A/N: Here it is-- the final betrayal. I'm sorry. It can only go up from here, right? LOL no.
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when I update, please enable notifications from my Blog page!
Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
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“Care to tell me why we’re meeting in an unused guest suite on a floor that’s mostly under construction?” Nat asked when you opened the door of your borrowed new room to let her in. You didn’t utter a word, just thrust a copy of the text screenshots into her hands and sat down at the edge of the unfamiliar bed, waiting for her to read them.
“What’s this?” she asked.
“Just read it,” you told her, voice devoid of any emotion.
Natasha scanned through the messages, her eyes widening in shock and disgust as she made her way through them. “This has got to be some sort of sick trick, right?” she asked you when she’d finished. “Like, Carthage found some program online to make up fake text messages and sent them to mess with you. Barnes would nev–”
“I screenshotted them off of Bucky’s phone, myself, Nat,” you informed her.
There was a knock on the door and Nat opened it to reveal Wanda. “I came as soon as I could,” the other redhead said. “Why are we having a secret meeting?” Nat handed Wanda the screenshots and came to sit next to you on the bed while she read them.
Wanda’s hand flew to her mouth. “No,” she whispered, looking back up at you. “How could he? There must be some kind of mistake.”
“No mistake, Wands,” you said, standing up to take the pages from her. “It’s all right there, typed out by the man himself.” And then, as if to punish yourself further, you began to read out loud the text between Bucky and Jade:
Vix <3: Hey there, handsome xoxo
Vix <3: Bucky?
Vix <3: You just going to ignore me after everything?
>> How are you texting me? You're supposed to be blocked.
Vix <3: You should keep better track of your phone, then ;)
Vix <3: Or, at the very least, choose a better passcode.
>> What do you want?
Vix <3: I want to talk about what happened the other night.
>> Nothing happened.
Vix <3: Come on now, we both know that's not true ;)
>> It was a mistake. I should have never done it.
Vix <3: You don't make a mistake two separate times, Barnes.
>> Well, I did. And I regret it.
Vix <3: You didn't seem to regret it when you were blowing loads of cum inside of me.
>> Jesus Christ, Jade. You don't have to be so fucking crass about it.
Vix <3: I thought you liked girls with dirty mouths.
>> Jade, I have a girlfriend. She’s the only one whose mouth I like dirty. Or at all.
Vix <3: That's right, your Perfect, Precious Pocket.
>> Do not talk about her.
Vix <3: Oh please. Don't pretend you care about her now.
>> I love her.
Vix <3: You have a funny way of showing it, sleeping with me just a day and a half ago.
>> She is EVERYTHING to me.
Vix <3: Obviously not.
>> I thought she slept with Steve.
>> I was a fucking idiot.
>> It was a misunderstanding.
Vix <3: Orly? That how she's going to see it?
>> She's not gonna find out.
Vix <3: You think you can hide the truth from her? Please.
>> The last thing I want to do is hurt her.
Vix <3: Should have thought of that before you fucked me. Twice.
Vix <3: If you don't tell her, I will.
>> She'd never believe you. She fucking hates you.
Vix <3: I don't need her to believe me. I just need her to see these texts.
>> You wouldn't.
Vix <3: Try me. You don't want to fuck with me, Bucky.
Vix <3: Tell her the truth or I will.
>> I swear to god, Carthage, you breathe a word of this to her and I *will* fucking kill you.
>> That is not an idle threat.
>> Ending your life would be as easy for me as breathing.
Vix <3: You wouldn't.
>> Do you want to try me?
>> Because I promise you, she is the most important thing in this world to me, and if you threaten that, I will end you without losing a wink of sleep.
>> You know what I'm capable of. Don't test me.
>> Do you understand me?
>> I said, do you understand me?
Vix <3: Christ, yes, Barnes. I understand.
Vix <3: I'll keep my mouth shut.
Vix <3: But you're a real piece of shit, you know that?
>> You're not telling me anything I don't already know.
Vix <3: I'd be so fucking good to you if you just gave me a chance.
>> Not happening. And if I find out you even insinuate to Pocket, or to anyone, what happened in Russia, it will be the absolute last thing you ever do, and no one will ever find your body.
Vix <3: I already told you, I won't tell your Precious Pocket. I'm not a liar.
>> Good. We're done. I'll speak to Steve about having someone else take over your training.
Vix <3: WHAT?! You don't have to do that!
>> I can't be around you anymore. I don't want to be around you anymore.
Vix <3: Temptation too strong? Afraid you'll make another 'mistake'?
>> Fuck you.
Vix <3: You already did, baby xoxo
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Wanda whispered when you’d finished reading. “Pocket, honey, are you alright?” She looked at you as if she were terrified you were going to break. And maybe the old you would have. This new you, the one that was forged under rage and ice, was made of harder, crueler stuff.
“I’ll live,” you said. Nat and Wanda exchanged a glance that didn’t escape your notice. “What?” you snapped at them.
“Hey,” Nat said, “Don’t get mad at us; we’re just worried about you. The last time he pulled something like this, you were a mess. This,” she indicated the sheets of paper you still held, “is way worse, so forgive us for expecting you to not be okay.”
You sighed and slumped down into a nearby chair. “I’m sorry, guys,” you said. “Obviously I’m not okay, and it’s not fair of me to take out my frustrations on you. But this time is different. Before, I was devastated, I was sad. But now? Now I’m fucking pissed. It’s like every ounce of love I felt for him has been turned into pure, unadulterated hatred, and all I want is for him to fucking suffer. I want him to hurt the way he hurt me.” Wanda opened her mouth to speak, but you interrupted her before she could. “And I know that’s not healthy, Wands. Trust me, I know that. I’ve just never been this angry before in my entire fucking life. God, not even at fucking Darren.”
“Who’s Darren?” Wanda asked, but Nat shook her head at her.
“Not now,” she said.
“I don’t even want him dead,” you continued, voice rising, as though Wanda hadn’t spoken at all. “Death would be too good for him! I want him to feel pain, pain like he has never experienced before in his long, utterly useless life!”
“Pocket,” Nat warned. She knew you were dangerously close to saying something you might eventually come to regret.
You sighed, the rage fleeting and leaving you feeling hollow and broken. “I know,” you said. “I don’t really mean it. I’m just so goddamned hurt!”
“I know it’s difficult to believe this right now,” Wanda said, taking a step closer to put a hand on your shoulder, “but he does still love you– he said he—”
“No,” you interrupted, sounding every bit as defeated as you felt. “You don’t do that to someone you love. You just don’t. This morning, he talked about getting our own place, getting married, starting a fucking family.” You choked back your emotions, but your voice still cracked. “I thought he was ready to take things to the next step, to prove how much I meant to him, but he was just trying to distract me, trying to get me out of the Tower because he couldn’t risk me running into her, couldn’t risk her telling me the fucking truth he was too much of a coward to admit.”
Nat and Wanda looked from you to each other, lost in their sense of helplessness, of not knowing how to care for you in your time of need.
“You know,” you went on, “I probably would have forgiven him, if he had just straight up told me the truth. I mean, we weren’t even technically together, so it wasn’t cheating. If he’d said ‘I’m sorry, Pocket. I saw those articles and I went fucking crazy with jealousy. All I could think about was getting back at you because I thought you betrayed me.’ Yeah, I’d have been pissed, and it might have taken a while, but I could have forgiven him if he had just been fucking honest with me. That’s all I ever asked of him. That he just be fucking honest. But he’s lied to me, again and again and again.
“He took away my right to make an informed choice about my own fucking life,” you said, and this time, the emotions couldn’t be held back. “He of all fucking people should know what that feels like,” you sobbed. “He should know how valuable that choice is! How valuable it is to me!” And there it was, really, the crux of the matter. He knew how much you valued the freedom you now had over your own life, after so many years of not having any choices in what happened to your own body, and he’d stolen your ability to make a choice for yourself. He’d had sex with you, knowing you never would have consented if you knew he’d been with Carthage less than 24 hours prior. He’d violated so much more than your trust this time.
Nat stood up and raced over to you, throwing her arms around you. Wanda looked on for a moment, confused, before joining Nat in embracing you.
The entire time you’d been speaking to your friends, your phone had been silently vibrating. You’d turned the ringer off as soon as you texted Nat and Wanda, asking them to meet you. You didn’t need to look at the screen to know that it was Bucky who was trying to get ahold of you. If you’d been in a better frame of mind, you’d have laughed at the irony– here you had spent all day yesterday waiting on a text or call from him that never came, and now he was blowing up your phone and you couldn’t stand the thought of speaking to or hearing from him. Life was sure funny sometimes.
“Ms. (Y/L/N), Ms. Romanoff, Ms. Maximoff,” FRIDAY’s voice rang through your borrowed room. “Mr. Stark is requesting everyone’s presence in Conference Room C for a mandatory pre-mission briefing to begin in ten minutes.”
“Fucking Tony,” you moaned. A mandatory meeting meant a mandatory encounter with Bucky, and you were so not ready for that yet.
“Don’t worry,” Wanda said, squeezing your hands. “Natasha and I won’t leave your side. He won’t be able to get near you. I’ll put a forcefield up around you if I have to.”
You managed to sniff out a laugh and wiped your nose. “Thanks, Wands. I really appreciate it.” Steeling yourself, you stood up from your chair. “Let’s go see what Tony wants.”
<- Previous Part / Next Chapter ->
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x you#bucky x reader#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky x female reader#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes fanfiction#james bucky buchanan barnes#james buchanan barnes#mcu bucky barnes#james barnes
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Unwanted: Chapter 24, Undercover - Pt. 1
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader
Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, exotic dancing, underage drug use, implications of human trafficking, poorly translated Russian
Word Count: 1.8k
Previously On...: You returned back to the safehouse. Sam told you Bucky's been trying to avoid Cunthrage, but you're done caring.
A/N: I'm not going to lie, I love Dimitri. <3
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates
Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
Taglist: (Sadly, tag list is closed; Tumblr will not let me add anyone new. If you want to be notified when I update, please Follow me for Notifications!) @jmeelee @cazellen @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @blackhawkfanatic @buckybarnessimpp @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows @sashaisready @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @keylimebeag @maybefoxysouls @vicmc624 @j23r23 @wintercrows @crist1216 @cjand10 @pattiemac1@les-sel @dottirose @winterslove1917 @harperkenobi @ivet4 @casey1-2007 @mrsevans90 @steeph-aniie @bean-bean2000 @beanbagbitch @peachiestevie @wintrsoldrluvr @shadowzena43
Tumblr will not let me directly tag the following: @marcswife21 @erelierraceala @jupiter-107 @doublejeon @hiqhkey @unaxv @brookeleclerc
You spent the next few days in one of two ways: your work hours trying to find out as much about Kozlov’s silent partners as possible, and your off time looking for someone to fuck the memory of Bucky right out of you.
You were coming up empty on the former, and even worse on the latter. It didn’t seem to matter how many guys you found to put their dicks in you; none of them did what Bucky could do to your body. You’d at least learned from your mistake with Bad Decision #1 and had gone out and bought a large pack of condoms. You weren’t going to run any more risks in that department.
As you entered the floor for the start of your next shift, Henchman #2– Dimitri– you reminded yourself, approached you.
“Cherry, yes?” he asked.
“Uh, yeah.”
“Boss vants you to dance in his private lounge tonight,” he said, gently herding you in the direction of Kozlov’s suite of rooms.
“Okay,” you said hesitantly. “Is there a private party, or…” You left the thought hanging, hoping Dimitiri would fill the silence.
Bless his heart, the idiot did. He leaned down to whisper conspiratorially as you walked together. “Zer is big boss with Kozlov tonight,” he told you, and your heart nearly stopped. You couldn’t believe your luck. “He vishes to see ze best talent, and Kozlov ask for you special.” Your eyes glanced down to your bangle. Were they about to try and make you their latest offering for the auction block?
“Big boss?” you asked, feigning ignorance. “But I thought Kozlov owned the club. How can he have a boss if he is the boss?”
You’d stopped now in front of the doors to Kozlov’s rooms.
Dimitiri laughed, as though you were just a silly girl who couldn’t possibly understand how the world worked. “Kozlov owns Viggle Room, yes. Dis iz true. But big boss is from large group zat funds club. Very secret group. Very scary.” He raised his hands like monster claws and laughed. “Kozlov calls zem– how do you say? Gidra.” Hydra.
You gasped, and Dimitri mistook your surprise for fear.
“Oh, not to worry, little dove! I zink zis group not so scary as zey pretend to be. Gidra all talk.” He held up his hand like a puppet. “All ze time, Gidra is ‘blah, blah, blah,’ yes? No action.”
“What do you mean?” you asked, hoping you weren’t pressing your luck with your question.
“Zer is somezing Gidra iz looking for. Zey vant it very bad. Very, very bad. Zey look for long time, yes? But never find. Dimitri think, Gidra cannot be good at job if ze cannot find zis zing zey are to be looking for, no?”
“Well, what are they looking for? Maybe I’ve seen it.” Yeah, you were laying it on a little thick now, but you wanted to keep the man talking to see what other nuggets of intel he was willing to drop in your lap.
“Aw, little dove iz very sweet to ask. But Dimitri doez not know vhat zis important zing iz. Kozlov never say.” “That doesn’t seem very nice of him,” you said, hedging on a bet to gain move of the man’s confidence. “You’ve always seemed like a very good employee for Mr. Kozlov. Very loyal, very brave. He should reward you by trusting you more.”
Dimitri’s chest puffed up a bit at your words. “Little dove is kind. Dimitri iz not worried. Kozlov will tell if Dimitri must know.”
Well, that failed.
Dimitri knocked on the door, and after a moment, Kozlov answered, shirt half unbuttoned and nose already red from having snorted something. Wonderful, you thought. This’ll be great.
“Cherry Pie, boss,” Dimitri said, presenting you to Kozlov. The look the club owner gave you as he eyed you up and down was downright lecherous and you had to suppress the way it made your skin crawl.
“Ah, ze little dove, at last!” Kozlov exclaimed, throwing the door open wider. You glanced over his shoulder and could see a few other men, among them six or seven of Kozlov’s top girls in various states of undress. “Come, come,” he motioned you inside. “I have friendz I vish you to meet!”
If you had been expecting Kozlov to walk you up to each man and introduce them by name, you were sorely mistaken. Instead, he put his hands on your shoulder and addressed them as if you were an inanimate object.
“Gentlemen, I present our Cherry Pie! She haz only been vith us a short time, but she haz proved very popular, and has much talent. Show them vhat you do, little dove.”
He smacked your ass, your cue to begin your dance. You tried to keep your focus on the men’s conversation as you gyrated to the music, but one of the other girls danced her way over to you and tried striking up a conversation.
“Hi! I’m Chloe! I hope you don’t mind; I watched some of your sets. You’re such a good dancer!” You smiled in her direction, not wanting to take your concentration from the men, who seemed to be comparing the girls against one another.
“How long have you been in the business,” the girl– Chloe– asked you.
“A while,” you murmured
“No wonder you’re so good, then!” She smiled brightly as she bent over and shook her ass. “You’ve had time to practice. I just started. My stepdad set me up at this place. I guess he used to play cards with Mr. Kozlov? That’s how he knew the club needed more dancers.”
That caught your attention and you froze momentarily. “How old are you?” you asked her. You turned to really look at her. God. She could have been you fifteen years ago.
Chloe leaned in close and whispered in your ear. “Eighteen,” she said with a giggle– you didn’t believe her for a minute, “but my stepdad said if anyone asks, I’m supposed to tell them I’m twenty-one”
Your stomach turned, and you felt for a moment like you might be sick. “Why aren’t you in school?” you asked her, trying to keep the sudden tremble out of your voice.
Chloe shrugged as she turned in a seductive circle. “My stepdad says we need money more than I need school right now. He said once we’re back on our feet, I can go back.”
“What about your mom? What does she say? She can’t agree with that.”
Chloe’s face fell, and the churning sensation in your stomach intensified. “She’s sick.” Her voice was so soft now you had to strain to hear it.
Your breathing began coming faster, your pulse picking up. This was wrong. “You shouldn’t be here, Chloe,” you whispered to her, desperation in your voice.
Chloe frowned and paused her dancing. “I know I’m not as good as you, but I’m a fast learner. I’ll get better.”
“No,” you interjected quickly. “That’s not what I meant. I mean you shouldn’t be in this club, you shouldn’t be a fucking stripper. You’re just a kid. You should be in school, getting an education, not shaking your ass for some scumbag stepfather.”
A heavy crease appeared between Chloe’s brows. “He’s not a scumbag,” she countered. “He works hard, but the money’s just never enough. Mom’s medicine is expensive, and we don’t have insurance.”
“Then he should have gotten you a job at McDonald’s or something, not making you show strange men your tits for money!” you hissed.
Chloe took a step away from you. “You’re not better than me,” she said, and you could hear the hurt in her voice.
“I never said I was,” you began.
“Ladies!” Kozlov called, interrupting you and drawing the girls’ attention back to where the men were sitting, “come, it iz time to share some party favors!”
On the table were lines of coke, one prepared for each dancer. “Who vill go first?” Kozlov asked with a grin.
Chloe stepped forward, casting you a cold glance.
“Ah, Chloe! Come, come, love.” You wanted to scream, to swipe your hand across the table and send the white powder flying across the room, but it was vital you maintain your cover. You didn’t have nearly enough information to risk blowing it over some, well, blow.
The men murmured appreciatively as Chloe bent over, making sure to point her ass in their direction, as she snorted the line up her nose. It was obvious by the ease in which she did it, with no hesitation, that this was not her first time. You closed your eyes.
One by one, the other girls stepped forward to do their lines. You noticed how the men murmured amongst themselves as each girl stepped up, as if they were judging them. And then it hit you.
This was a test.
They were determining how well you each followed orders, how much resistance you would put up. You watched as some of the girls sniffled and sneezed as they inhaled; these were the girls who made the men seem happiest– you knew they were pleased to see a girl who apparently had never done coke before willingly do so just because a man told her to. They were judging your submissiveness.
Finally, there were only two of you left: you, and a redhead you knew went by Birdie. The poor girl looked terrified and was shaking her head. You stepped forward.
“Ah, little dove,” Kozlov cooed, “I vaz vondering vhen you vould come play.” You took a deep breath to steel your nerves, bent down, and snorted the two remaining lines yourself.
You felt the rush hit you almost immediately. “Oops,” you giggled, “sorry, Birdie. I guess I got a little greedy.” There was no mistaking the gratitude in the other girl’s eyes– it was obvious to her that you had snorted the second line so that she wouldn’t have to.
You could already feel your heart begin to race, and for a moment, you almost felt like you had two heartbeats. Kozlov came up behind you and wrapped a lanky arm around your waist.
“Naughty, naughty, little dove,” he smirked at you. “I vill have to punish you later,” he whispered in your ear. It sent a shiver of repulsion throughout your body, which Kozlov must have taken for anticipation, because he pressed his hips into your back, and you could feel his erection press against you.
From there, your memories of the night became hazy. You had brief flashes of awareness– grinding against one of the visiting men– kissing another dancer– Kozlov’s hands all over your body. You knew the situation was not ideal, that Sam would be furious with you. Hell, you knew you could potentially jeopardize the entire mission, but in the moment, you realized that all the pain, all the anger and rage you’d been holding in because of Bucky– all that was just gone, as though it had blown away on the wind. And though a tiny voice in the back of your head was telling you you’d regret everything in the morning, for the moment, you were grateful.
<- Previous Chapter / Next Part ->
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x you#bucky x reader#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky x female reader#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes fanfiction#james bucky buchanan barnes#james buchanan barnes#mcu bucky barnes#james barnes
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[CN] MLQC Lucien’s The Sea No Longer Distant MQ translation (Part 1/3)
⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️
This post contains a detailed spoiler for a MQ that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~
[Warning]: The content of this MQ is pretty explicit and may not be suitable for individuals under the age of 18 (CN server). It is recommended that those who do not meet this age requirement refrain from proceeding beyond this point.
Translation under the cut!
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
[Notes from Lux: Special thanks to @ivioivioivi for checking some lines of the translation! Personally, translating this date is a hell of a struggle for me and I wouldn’t able to finish it without her help lol-
Before we start, I’d recommend you all read Fantasy Book Date, Devotion Date, Distant Similarity, and Monochrome Scenery. This MQ specifically references these dates/shares a similar theme so, if you haven’t read it or just want to jog your memory, please check them out first! :>
Currently, I haven't made the subtitled video, so for now here’s the CN video link if anyone wants to follow along his voice acting.]
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
—[Part 1]—
Host: ... And now, we are about to unveil the final award of the evening at the Magnolia Awards - the Best Variety Show.
As thunderous applause erupts, I find myself holding my breath, my heart pounding in my chest.
The "Best Director" award I just received feels heavy in my hands as if it's also waiting for another trophy of equal weight to be embraced.
Host: ...Now, let's take a look at the nominated works for this year's Best Variety Show.
The first nominee, produced by my company, appears on the big screen, a montage of past highlights flashing by.
After the five short films are shown in sequence, the award presenter opens the envelope in her hand.
Presenter: And the winner of the Magnolia Award for Best Variety Show is...
Her final words unleash a thunderous wave of applause, and the dazzling lights make it nearly impossible for me to keep my eyes open, leaving me in a daze.
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
The ceaseless traffic flows by like a stream, and it is not until a vaguely familiar building appears in the distance that I slowly come back to my senses.
I blink, and the white building becomes clearer as I focus on it, standing out with a sense of tranquility in the fading twilight.
….Unbeknownst to myself, I find myself subconsciously drawn to the vicinity of the research institute.
I can't help but sign, feeling a pang of annoyance as I become aware of my own emotions.
MC: I really do want to talk with Lucien after all…
Am I hoping for his comfort? Or seeking his advice?
Perhaps I just want to see him at this moment.
MC: He is probably still busy…
At 7 in the evening, the world slows its pace with the fading twilight on the horizon. The rhythmic flashing of the red traffic light at the crosswalk spreads the last remnants of twilight.
And in that small, illuminated scene, I see a familiar figure.
He gazes steadily ahead, his eyes appearing to hold a multitude of things, yet also seeming to contain nothing.
His face bears traces of exhaustion, and he seems distant and unreal as if he were merely a figment of my imagination.
But in a twist of fate, his vacant gaze shifts in the next second and meets mine.
After a moment of stunned silence, I see him smile gently.
The green light stops flashing at the last second, and I see Lucien standing in front of me.
Lucien: [chuckles] Good evening, MC.
MC: [smiles softly] Good evening, Professor Lucien, I didn't expect to meet you here.
I can't help but smile, and naturally take his hand as we walk towards home.
Lucien: I want to leave work early today.
Lucien: Meeting you proves that this was the right choice.
His voice gently accompanies the evening breeze, and I inexplicably feel that Lucien's mood doesn't seem particularly good either.
Considering his recent state of intense overtime, perhaps he's been dealt with some setbacks or failures.
I swallow the words that are about to spill out of my mouth. I purse my lips and start talking to him about amusing things I haven't shared yet, and listen to him talk about the bickering among his assistants.
Such a rare leisurely stroll, sharing everyday life we've missed with each other, everything is so good.
Lucien: By the way, I forgot to congratulate you on winning the awards.
Suddenly, I hear Lucien's voice.
Lucien: I received your message this morning, but I had some unexpected situations this afternoon, so I didn't have time to watch the live awards ceremony.
Lucien: Having won all the major awards for both "Best Director" and "Best Program" in two variety shows, for such an amazing Miss Producer, I should have congratulated you much earlier.
His tone is so brisk and firmly assured* that I'm momentarily stunned, letting it fall heavily to the ground.
Lucien is also stunned.
The air around me turns stiff, and I don't know how to describe my feelings.
The wave that's directly crashing over me now feels far more immense and intangible than the moment the guest announced it, causing both pain and sadness.
I clench my palms and instinctively muster a smile at him.
After all, if I were to cry pitifully now, it would only make me appear weak and humiliated.
MC: Hehe, I'll accept half of Professor Lucien's congratulations first! Winning Best Director is a small victory, right?
MC: I still need to keep working hard!
I can't even bring myself to look into his eyes and just want to keep walking forward.
Just as I'm about to walk away, he holds my hand to stop me, and when I turn around, I see his deep gaze filled with guilt and comfort.
Lucien: [guiltily] Sorry, it was my mistake for not confirming.
Lucien: [in a comforting tone] Don't worry, you've already done a great job. Awards are just one way of judging, and they can't determine everything.
Lucien: If you feel sad, tell me all about your feelings.
The night falls, and the streetlights stretch his shadow long.
Lucien: It's okay, you can always slow down your growth in front of me.
I look at the person in front of me, take a deep breath, and hold his hand back.
MC: I know, I am moving forward at my own pace.
MC: If I didn't do well, I'll just find a solution.
MC: Please don't worry Professor Lucien, I know what I need to do. I will keep working hard.
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
[T/N: Before we move on to the next part, I want to say that this time I won't write an essay because I think the date itself explains its plot theme pretty well, I'll just use T/N to highlight some important parts and more ;)
MC uses the word 笃定 (dǔ dìng) to describe Lucien's tone (and also gaze, which will be used in part 2). I translated it to 'firm assuredness'. This word often describes how certain and unwavering a person is about something or a specific belief. In this context, Lucien is confident that MC will always be the ‘best’ and can achieve any goal she sets. However, this may also imply a kind of ‘expectation’, which is where the ‘problem’ of this date arises.]
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
—[Exclusive Radio - Resignation Application]—
[door knocking sounds]
Lucien: Come in.
Zeng Shu: Long time no see, sorry to bother you.
Lucien: Is there a problem with the project's progress?
Zeng Shu: No, the project is going very smoothly. The results from the last few trials have been very stable.
Zeng Shu: The reason I came to see you today... is to discuss a personal matter with you.
Lucien: Oh? Please go ahead.
Zeng Shu: I want to withdraw from the project.
Lucien: …
Zeng Shu: Ah, don't worry. I will complete all the handover tasks before I leave.
Zeng Shu: The project is very stable in all aspects now. Although the manpower is not abundant, having one less person won't be a problem.
Zeng Shu: Thank you for giving me the opportunity to join the project. I'm sorry I won't be able to work with everyone to see it through to completion.
Lucien: …
Zeng Shu: …
Lucien: Is there a specific reason for this?
Lucien: Although we're not in a critical period, personnel turnover will inevitably have an impact on the project.
Lucien: I believe most problems can be solved.
Zeng Shu: You've misunderstood. There's no problem.
Zeng Shu: I'm just tired.
Zeng Shu: I want to take some time off.
Lucien: How much time off do you need?
Zeng Shu: I’m not trying to pressure you into approving my leave, Professor.
Zeng Shu: I just... need some time to really think about whether I’m actually suited for research.
Lucien: You’re not a fresh graduate.
Lucien: You’ve worked on your own projects, supervised students, and you’re experienced. You’ve also published numerous high-impact papers.
Lucien: I can't understand the meaning behind your statement.
Zeng Shu: …
Zeng Shu: Professor, I'm aware of everything you mentioned.
Zeng Shu: But not everyone can be like you, maintaining such passion for research no matter what.
Zeng Shu: And not everyone who pursues research is as gifted as you are.
Lucien: ...I always thought you were quite level-headed.
Lucien: I generally don't recommend bringing emotions into work.
Zeng Shu: Your judgment of me is not wrong; I am very calm right now.
Zeng Shu: From the moment I had this thought to... coming to your office, I've carefully considered it for three months.
Zeng Shu: This is the result of my comprehensive consideration. I hope you can approve it.
Lucien: …
Lucien: Do you want to withdraw from the current project, or are you not considering joining any future projects either?
Zeng Shu: I won't join any of them.
Lucien: Even the project you proposed two years ago? I received news last week that it can be officially approved.
Zeng Shu: Yes. I'm not considering it anymore.
Lucien: [sighs heavily] I understand.
Lucien: I will respect your decision.
Lucien: However, I hope you can continue to perform your related duties normally before you leave completely.
Lucien: If the project is affected at this stage, it will be difficult for either of us to handle.
Zeng Shu: I understand, don't worry.
Zeng Shu: I'll start the handover process tomorrow.
Lucien: Alright.
Zeng Shu: Sorry for the trouble, goodbye.
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
[T/N: This part is interesting because it shows how Lucien's subconscious 'expectation' extends not only to MC but also to the people who work with him. This 'expectation' can make people ‘tired’ and ‘exhausted’ from trying to keep up with him, and it's something that he himself is not really aware of. Additionally, I want to highlight how he doesn't understand the concept of being tired in a non-physical sense, like, at all, which will be important in a later part ;)]
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
—[Part 2]—
Sunlight streams through the windowsill, casting a brilliant and rejuvenating glow over the quiet room.
I walk into the computer room, swiftly turn on the computer, and bring up the rough cut of the video completed yesterday.
In the footage, the guest laughs endlessly in a seaside cottage. The suitable music and adorable text overlays convey the happiness even more directly.
I sit on the seat while hugging my legs, letting the laughter from the headphones linger in my mind, but it can't seem to drown out what happened yesterday.
I don't know when it started, but after putting in so much effort, success has somehow become a kind of arrogant ‘matter of course'.
Perhaps I've gotten used to the taste of success, so when failure arrives, I become even more at a loss.
And compared to this frustration... my mind returns to the firmly assured eyes I saw yesterday.
??: Boss, why are you here so early?
I lift my head and see Willow standing in front of me with a bit of a worried look.
MC: You're one to talk, didn't you come early too?
Willow: I just felt like something was up, so I thought I’d come and check on things.
She says that as she sits down next to me and turns on her computer. The dim glow of the screen reflects on her face, revealing traces of fatigue and frustration.
Yet, she turns her head and smiles at me.
Willow: Boss, do you want to take a break? You've been busy for a long time lately, haven't you?
I think I should say something, but as I gaze into those firm eyes, it seems like all words are inadequate.
In the end, I just shake my head with a smile.
MC: Don't worry, I'm not tired.
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Over the next week, the shadow of failure gradually fades away, and everything returns to normal.
Lucien is still busy, and I'm still immersed in the intense preparations for the summer special.
It's just that I often feel Lucien's gaze on me. During our interactions, he seems to observe me from time to time, yet he never says a word.
Is he thinking about how to comfort me, or is he worried that I'm just pretending to be strong?
After much thought, I stubbornly chose not to break his silence.
Compared to words, perhaps more proactive actions can show him that I have become more resilient.
It seems like an invisible thread is becoming more tense, but neither of us has the time to care.
I come home late at night and notice Lucien sitting on the sofa, looking at some documents.
A vast expanse of night covers him, and his eyes, as calm as still water, seem unable to be touched by any emotion.
MC: Lucien, are you okay?
He doesn't seem to notice my return. He freezes for a moment before slowly raising his head.
Lucien: I'm fine.
Speaking softly, he naturally draws me into a hug, his chin resting on my head. A long sigh escapes his lips.
The world becomes peaceful in the instant, fully contained within this gentle embrace.
MC: [worriedly] Is the experiment not going well?
Lucien: [inhales deeply before speaking softly] Mm. I've tried a few methods, but none of them can quite solve the problems.
Lucien: So, I'm thinking of throwing this out and starting from scratch.
MC: Is the direction wrong?
Lucien: [chuckles] Probably.
He remains silent for a while before continuing slowly.
Lucien: One of my senior research associates who's been working with me recently quit. No one can fill his shoes right now, so it's making the process a bit more troublesome.
Lucien: Overall, it might be more efficient to just start fresh.
MC: Why did he quit?
Lucien: He said he was too tired.
His calm voice seems full of incomprehension and ambivalence. Although I can't see Lucien's face at the moment, I can imagine his slightly furrowed brow.
Lucien: But theoretically, the work arrangements are sound, and I didn't force him to constantly monitor every result with me.
Lucien: So I don't know either.
Lucien: Since he was determined to leave, I let him go.
His tone reveals a rare cold sternness as if he is unwilling to waste time on unnecessary matters.
Lucien: There will always be a replacement.
I blink in a daze, feeling like I can see that senior professor.
I really want to say something to Lucien, but in the end, I still don't know how to start.
Lucien: MC, let's not talk about that. Actually, I really want to chat with you.
MC: Hmm?
He releases his hug and gently caresses my face.
Lucien: [in a gentle tone] I wonder if you're still feeling a bit sad because you didn't win the award for best work.
The soft moonlight made his face appear so gentle at this moment.
Under his dotingly gentle gaze, I don't want to hide my heart. I know Lucien has been waiting for a long time.
MC: Actually, I thought I had already secured victory, but unexpectedly, I failed.
MC: So when the results were announced, I felt very frustrated.
I look at Lucien honestly and muster up the courage.
MC: I originally thought this feeling of frustration was simply because… I failed.
MC: But when I saw you and when you congratulated me, subconsciously assuming that I should be the "best"...
I feel my voice tremble a little.
MC: It was then that I realized I hadn't fulfilled your expectations.
MC: And at that moment, it was the saddest time for me.
Lucien is rational and effortlessly capable. He believes that if something can be done, it can be done.
So he subconsciously believes that the heights I can reach are ones I will undoubtedly attain, or even surpass.
Otherwise, on this long and arduous journey of pursuit, I would only watch his figure grow further and further away.
In those slightly widened eyes, I see a lot of confusion and incomprehension.
Lucien: I…
“Ring ring-”
A sudden, insistent phone call interrupted him. After hesitating for a moment and seeing the caller ID, I decided to answer.
Man: Boss, urgent news! Looks like a storm is about to hit. The weather department says the coastal weather won't be good for the next two weeks.
Man: All the subsequent filming will be affected. We just went over the script and realized we need to make major changes.
Man: What should we do? Should we cancel it? Or what? The guests' schedules are kind of hard to change.
MC: It's definitely going to be difficult to change the guests' schedules now, and it will also affect the following weekly broadcasts. Let's revise the script.
I quickly run through the ideas in my head and a vague idea comes to me.
MC: Have the production team book me a flight tonight. I'm going straight there.
After hanging up the phone, the previous atmosphere has already dissipated. Lucien sits in front of me, much of his body falling into the shadows.
MC: Lucien, I didn't say those things to make you feel guilty or anything, because those were just my own feelings.
MC: It's me who wants to catch up to you and fulfill your expectations.
I smile and reach out to stroke his face, gently smoothing out the slight frown that forms unconsciously on his brow.
MC: I'll take care of my own feelings, so don't worry.
MC: I'll run even faster next time.
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
—[Memory Silhouette - The back of a running figure]—
MC: I'm leaving now. Make sure to drive safely on your way home!
Lucien: Relax, don't worry.
Lucien: You don't need to rush. There's always a solution.
MC: I know. Don't worry~ I'll message you as soon as I land. Don't wait up too late for me.
Lucien: [chuckles] Okay, I'll be sure to follow Miss Producer's instructions. I'll go to sleep as soon as I feel tired.
In the somewhat deserted early morning airport, the girl gives him a quick peck on the cheek before heading towards the security checkpoint.
The security checkpoint is almost empty, but she still instinctively turns her head and waves to him at every turn.
Yet, it seems like she hates to leave him waiting, so she keeps waving back at him non-stop.
Lucien: "Slow down."
He mouths the words, knowing full well the sound won’t reach her, yet somehow he still has this feeling that she can hear them.
As her figure walks into the security checkpoint, she waves to him one last time from dozens of meters away before disappearing from sight.
He doesn't know why, but looking at her figure from behind, he felt as if he was being escaped from.
This feeling makes him very uncomfortable.
He furrows his brows in irritation and turns to walk into the black night.
Where exactly did things start to go wrong?
The girl's slightly bitter smile flashes back into his mind, but it brings more confusion than answers.
Why does his unconscious firm assuredness sadden her more than the failure itself?
Why do I feel assured that she can do it, and why does she think my expectations are so important?
We're clearly not on the same track.
Clearly, she can have her own pace, and I also allow her to fail...
Is it because I am someone special to her?
Does she want to meet my expectations? But my expectation is for her to just be happy and always within my sight*.
Do I have any other expectations for her?
Too many fragmented questions flood his mind, and each one of them feels unfamiliar and chaotic. This feeling of not having a starting point unconsciously makes him a bit infuriated.
There are still more tricky problems and troubles at work waiting for him, which he has to tackle one by one.
Despite thinking this way, her face still appears again and again among the numerous and complicated tasks in his mind.
Compared to those things that can be redone or thrown away, he feels some kind of deep-seated emptiness and unease.
He feels as if she has left him far behind, as if she knows more things that he cannot comprehend.
This feeling makes him even more irritable.
He instinctively turns at a fork in the road and continues until the familiar white building comes into view. Even so, his irritation doesn't seem to have subsided even a bit.
At this moment, his phone vibrates. He looks down and sees that it's a departure message from her.
MC’s message: "I'm boarding~ Just let me know when you get home! Don't forget to go to bed early~”
His fingers, naturally inclined to send a reply in the next second, hesitate just before hitting send. He closes his eyes and temporarily turns off the screen.
In that instant, he suddenly feels very childish.
What does it mean to say that she can handle her own emotions, yet still wants to run away to a faraway place?
He doesn't know the answer and can't think of a way to solve it.
He hurriedly walks into the lab. His sudden appearance caught everyone off guard. After a moment of stunned silence, they quickly come forward to greet him.
Assistant: Professor, why are you here?
Lucien: It's nothing. I'm just here to handle some other work. You can carry on.
Saying this, he walks into his own laboratory.
He doesn't plan to think about it anymore. There are still many things waiting for him, many plans and arrangements to implement—
Lucien: [whispers softly] Why…
The sound of the plane seems to pass overhead in the distance, and the night grows even darker.
Suddenly, he feels very lonely**.
✂— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
[T/N: *: Just want to expand on what Lucien said here! One of his expectations is ‘for her always within my sight', I think it refers to what he said back in S2 ch 51
MC: Maybe it’s because I know that no matter where I go, you'll always be watching over me. MC: Lucien, I hope you can always keep your eyes on me. Lucien: Of course, I will always watch over you. Until... you go to a place that even I can’t reach...-
-that no matter where the direction she goes he will always watch over her 🤧 I personally like this quote a LOT, like it's more or less what's ‘growing’ in his route feels like. He won't stop you and will support anything you do, no matter what you'll ‘grow’ to be. Even if you walk in a different direction from him, even if what you do is risky, even if the road is full of failures… He'll always give his unconditional attention, support, and safety from afar. He hopes for her to be ‘always within his sight’ so that he can continue to do so 🥺
**: "寂寞" often conveys a more profound and enduring sense of isolation than "loneliness”. It emphasizes the emotional aspect of feeling isolated or abandoned such as the sadness, emptiness and the yearningಥ‿ಥ]
Next Part=> [Click Here]
#sorry that it takes soo long#this one is esp painful to translate because all the poetic way to write it#mlqc lucien#mr love queen's choice#mlqc cn#mlqc spoiler#mlqc#mlqc translation#mr. love queen's choice#mr love lucien#mlqc xu mo#mlqc spoilers
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Wild nap
Pairing: Marauders x reader
Summary: a nap with the marauders and the reader.
Word count: 573
Warnings: none, just pure fluff. (Reader's gender is not mentioned) (Implied Sirius x Reader but interpretation is up to you).
Author's note: I was bored in class and made this so it's worth what it's worth. For the person who requested something, it's in the works, I started but can't find motivation to finish it right now so I am posting this to make you patient, sorry it's taking so long. As always: English is not my first langage, please be understanding and notify me if there is any mistake, I will correct them.
A few hours later, when James was supposed to be back home, Remus decided to search the whole house for him as he still haven’t seen him and was supposed to be back home for some time now. When he opened the door to the room the fox and the dog were still sleeping in, Remus didn’t expect to now see a stag cuddled up to the dog. The scenery was weird, to say the least. A full grown stag sleeping pressed to a dog that almost looked like a wolf who, himself, was curled around a small, red fox.
Remus immediately stopped when he entered the room. Here, on the floor, slept a big, black dog and a smaller fox. He knew who both these animals were, he wasn’t stupid. So he grabbed a blanket that laid on the bed they didn’t even bother to sleep on and covered both his sleeping friends with it. As quietly as he could- as he knew the fox was quite grumpy when woken up- he left the room to make himself a cup of tea.
Remus sighed. He couldn’t understand why his friends would be sleeping on the floor instead of their bed, but, mainly, why would they sleep in their animal forms? As he watched the three animals, his long day caught up to him and sleep made itself known in his body. He took a pillow from the bed and another blanket then settled next to the stag, right behind the black dog. The stag blinked his eyes open when he felt movement around him. When he noticed Remus was next to him, he pulled him more against himself with his front leg. The man now had his head resting on the stag’s stomach, the fur warm under his ear. All fell asleep like this. Cuddled to each other. Remus had to admit, it was pretty comfortable to sleep like this.
When you woke up from the nap, you were alone in the room but could hear voices coming from the living room and someone in the shower. You got up and stretched only to realise you were still in your fox form. You shifted and joined the group in the living room.
When you stepped in, you saw Lily, Mary, Dorcas and Marlene talking with Remus and Sirius. Sirius’ head shot up once he saw you and waved you over. You did as told and once you were within range, Sirius pulled you to sit on his lap. You blushed a little but were soon distracted by the photo ho showed you.
“-Look at how cute we look! I can barely see you, you were snuggled so deep in my fur, it’s covering you.”
“-You’re warm and have big paws, it’s really comfortable.” you responded. “Who took the photo?”
“-Lily did.” Sirius answered.
“-When none of you answered the door we just let ourselves in like you always do in our flat.” She explained.
“-Then we searched for you and found you all cuddled together. Lily couldn’t help herself and took a photo.” Mary continued.
“-Well, I like it a lot.” You said before Lily could make a nervous comment as you took the picture from Sirius’ hands.
He was confused at first but then he saw you get up and put it on the wall with all the others. The wall was complete now. Complete with happiness and life.
Thanks for reading, take care <3
dividers by @cafekitsune
#fluff#marauders x reader#marauders era#marauders fluff#original work#fanfiction#sirius black x reader#sirius black#sirius black fluff
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Hey y'all, it's me again
Back at it again with my bullshit.
So we're in the process of switching banks and being the dumb human beings we are, we forgot about one (1) bill that was on autopay with this account. Don't get me wrong, I didn't forget about the bill, I just forgot we set up autopay, and with this particular company, autopay doens't just pay the outstanding balence, but a set amount that happens to be the outstanding balance. Meaning, we're already paid the bill manually, but forgot to turn off autopay. I feel insanely stupid for making this mistake and autopay is now turned off, but they're applying the amount to the bill for next month rather than initiating a refund.
Anyway, because the direct deposit's switched over to the new account, there's no money going into this older one. I say all this because the autopay was still going through even though there weren't any funds in there, and instead of notifying me via the app like the bank app sometimes does, there was no notification, so it's just been overdrawn and sitting there. (This is the main reason we switched. This is a local bank and their app is garbage, the balance doesn't update regularly, and even though we're signed up for alerts, they usually don't come through).
Anyway, seeing as we weren't aware until this very morning, we paid our bills, gassed up the car, and now have nothing to pay this with.
It's not a huge amount, I mean it is for us,since we don't have it and are having to ask for it here, but it is what it is.
The amount we're in the red is -$86.94, including the overdraft fee.
If anyone could donate something to cover this, so we can just close down this account for good, i would be so grateful. My links are at the bottom, as always. Thank you so much for even reading this and please share if you're able. <3
Paypal || Ko-Fi || Venmo: @babrittsy
$0/$87
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solangelo fic awards 2023 nominations masterpost
i want to thank y'all for being super paitent w me as im positng this a few days after i said i would, which is entirely due to the insane turnout this year. there was over 200 fics submitted, (not including series) with over 110+ of those being included in the nominations! very excited for y'all to get this massive reclist and have a chance to read some amazing fics!
click here to vote!
unfortunately because of the absolute Bulk of the solangelo awards post this year, i have to link all the categories besides aoty in separate posts :,) i understand how chaotic this is, so please use the fic masterlist to your connivance! all the posts are linked below!
best angst noms
best au noms
best canon compliant noms
best chaptered (finished) noms
best chaptered (unfinished) noms
best fluff noms
best misc noms
best gift noms
best series noms
link to fic masterdoc
and our author of the year nominations are as follows!
gatesofember (ao3) (tumblr)
ghosttotheparty (ao3) (tumblr)
gnatashameow (ao3) (tumblr)
ikeasharksss (ao3) (tumblr)
pinkerpick (ao3) (tumblr)
rainnows (ao3) (tumblr)
the_oncoming_stormageddon (ao3) (tumblr)
yrbeecharmer (ao3) (tumblr)
please notify me of any inconveniences from the links, if you believe a fic has been placed in the wrong category, or if your desired fic does not show up in the poll.
voting guidelines:
voting will close on february 13th so that the winners post can be released on the 14th for valentines day! (for realsies this time i promise it doesnt take me as long as nominations lol)
if your work didnt make it in, there is most likely a reason! you are welcome to message me about it if you wish though and i cant check as to why
if your fic was nominated and counted but is missing on one of the docs, whether its here or the poll or the masterlist, please let me know!! i have missed things and had no idea, its ok! please dont be afraid to let me know i've made a mistake!
same goes for if something shows up twice, fic has already won, links are broken, etc etc!
if one of your works has been submitted, you can promote/mention this to your followers, please just no bribing or blackmail or anything like that i promise its not that deep
also no blackmailing other contestants, you all deserve a chance
there is no prize to this contest besides (i guess??) satisfaction, so dont get too worked up over it!
you aren’t required to vote if you have been nominated, though it is heavily recommended
you also aren’t required to vote in all categories anymore due to popular request, although we heavily advise that you do in order to keep voter count even
if you have been nominated, you are allowed to vote for yourself. just please also be considerate to others and vote for each category!
the google poll will ask for you to sign in just to ensure that you are only voting once. no emails are being collected! that being said, if you are more comfortable voting through ask/message/etc, feel free!
there is a few questions at the end of the poll, although none of them are required so you’re welcome to skip them if you’d like!
this is all just friendly competition, so everyone have fun! be sure to show the writers some love!!! <3
in the case that you see someone disrespecting the guidelines, feel free to let me know and i can handle it from there! :)
if you have any questions, feel free to shoot me an ask! any and all posts relating to this will be tagged with “lizs solangelo fic awards.”
as i do every year, but especially this year bc they really were an insane help, thank u @buoyantsaturn for helping!! <3
good luck to all! thank you for your patience!!!
#reblog when u vote for an i voted sticker in ur inbox <33#this won on the poll soooo this is what were goin with#solangelo#nico di angelo#will solace#lizs solangelo fic awards
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— COMMISSIONS
i am opening commissions for anyone that would be interested. i am struggling a little with maintaining rent and monthly payments with the income i have, so i’ve decided to open commissions for a little extra. if you’re interested, keep reading below.
— BASIC INFORMATION
0 / 5
there are five slots, i will be following a first come first serve basis. i’ll be writing both sfw and nsfw content, but keep in mind this is a yandere blog — there will always be an amount of violence, gore and dark content.
when you’re submitting your commissions please do so through pm’s and make sure you’re as detailed as possible. if you want to add your own oc, tell me everything i need to know to make it easier for both of us. include preferred pronouns, physical appearance, personality, likes and dislikes, relationships with other characters you want to appear and history.
give me a detailed plot and what you want to happen or give me creative space to create something for you.
— REFUNDS
i will not be offering refunds. i will be sending you the unfinished project before and you are allowed two revisions for drabbles and fics, as all the money made will be sent to a savings account immediately.
— COMMISSION TYPES
this is a small preview of what i’ll be offering
‣ drabbles and fics — these are pieces with at least 500 words up to 3000 words. depending on your commission they may take me between 1 — 3 weeks depending on the length you requested.
‣ headcanons — headcanons with descriptive points, will take max. 2 days.
⤷ e.g roommates — itadori yuuji
‣ editing / beta reading — i’m offering my help with your fiction. i can check for spelling or grammar mistakes and give suggestions if that’s what you’d like.
‣ layouts & moodboards — this is kind of like a bundle. i’ll be editing you a layout ( header & profile pic ) this can include anything you want, you can also ask for examples.
moodboards will be having 4/6/9 pics with any aesthetic you want or fitting to a story. also will be offering to make covers for your stories.
— FINISHED PIECES
you will be receiving the finished product as a pdf per email ( which won’t be shared anywhere ) i will notify you per pm which email your commission will come from. please don’t share or contact this email again. if you have allowed me to post your commission, i will add the piece to my masterlist and tag you if you’d like.
if you’ve commissioned a layout / moodboard / cover, please give credit when using it.
written pieces are for personal use only. you are not allowed to share or repost the work as your own, nor re–sell it.
— WHAT I WILL WRITE
i will be writing for bnha & jjk only. as this is a yandere blog, they will always be in this sort of au. though you can add any au you want.
‣ oc’s
‣ various kinks
‣ fwb, hybrids, etc
‣ nsfw content
‣ and more
there isn’t much i won’t write. just hit me up with your idea and i’ll let you know.
— PRICING
prices are in european currency, please make sure to keep that in mind when paying.
5€ ⇾ 500 words
10€ ⇾ 501 – 1000 words
15€ ⇾ 1001 – 2000 words
20€ ⇾ 2001 – 3000 words
anything over 3000 words will be priced with 1€ per 100 words. if i go over the estimated length without your wish, i will not be charging you for extra length.
3€ ⇾ for layouts ( header & profile pic )
3€ ⇾ for moodboards or covers
3€ ⇾ for detailed headcanons
5€ ⇾ editing & beta reading
i’ll be offering bundles as well.
5€ ⇾ layout & moodboard bundle
2€+ ⇾ for a moodboard / cover or headcanons added to your fic commission
— PAYMENT
payment will go through paypal only. i’ll be providing my paypal account once both parties have agreed to the commission.
you can ask as many questions as you’d like. asking is always free.
thank you for supporting me in any way. please don’t hesitate to send me an ask if you have any questions. <3
i will still be posting regularly and doing requests as before. if you won’t commission anything maybe still like or reblog so people can see. thank you to everyone!
#yandere bnha#yandere mha#yandere boku no hero academia#yandere my hero academia#yandere jujutsu kaisen#yandere jjk#yandere x reader#yandere writing#writing comissions
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(Last Updated- 11/21/24)
The Basics …
I. Check the introductory post before requesting
↳ My pinned post is the go-to for checking what I currently accept. If I accept non-JoJo’s requests, drabbles, headcanons, matchups, it’ll all be listed front and center. Any request sent to me disregarding it (sending in a headcanon request when they’re closed, for example), will be deleted.
II. Multi-fandom (well, kind of)
↳ My blog is primarily focused on JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and my writing will certainly reflect that as well. That being said, there may be times when I open my writing to different fandoms (those of which I will list further down this post).
↳ I have yet read parts 8 and 9 of the manga (I’m very slow at catching up to things). As of now, I write for characters up to part 7.
III. Reader specifics
↳ If a gender is not picked out for the reader in a request, the reader will be written as gender neutral. If a specific set of pronouns aren’t given, the reader will be written to have they/them pronouns. AFAB and AMAB is preferred to be specified as well. Remember that someone’s gender is not necessarily a signifier of their pronouns or sex. For example, a fem!reader does not guarantee she/her pronouns.
↳ Matchups are only ever for JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure.
IV. OC requests
↳ I do take requests for your OC and your preferred s/o. Adding additional information on your requested OC is certainly appreciated. However, if you have posted information on the OC previously on your blog it isn’t necessary. I will do what I can to familiarize myself with your character before beginning to write the request. Take note that these requests may take longer for me to complete compared to others.
↳ OC requests are only ever for JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure.
V. NSFW and/or dark content
↳ Sexual content is allowed, and NSFW requests are allowed. That said, please try not to overload my inbox with NSFW content.
↳ Underage characters will be aged up and clearly depicted as such in the work itself. I am not going to write the characters as they are and just say they’re aged up in the description- I will make it clear within the work itself every single time.
↳ Yandere content is also something I am open to trying. I will always give a disclaimer about it; such relationship dynamics are never to be sought after in real life. Please, keep yourselves safe first and foremost.
↳ Any potentially triggering content will be given a warning on my part. Anything from swearing, to substance usage, to suggestive material, and anything/everything in between. As the writer, I feel it is my responsibility. If I ever miss something, notify me immediately so I may correct the mistake.
VI. What isn’t allowed
↳ No pedophilic or inscestual relationships allowed. No bestiality either. Please and thank you.
↳ Most mental and/or personal struggles I’m open to. That being said, I will write nothing on eating disorders, whether it be explicit or implied.
↳ Monster characters/AUs are not allowed. No mermaids, werewolf, ghosts, or otherworldly-types. The character DIO (and the Pillar Men?) is the only acception by nature of their characters in universe.
↳ This is very specific, but I will not be doing romantic writing for the character Joseph Joestar at all.
Fandoms and Characters …
↳ Favorite characters of mine to write for will be highlighted in red; if a character listed appears in a later part that is also included (examples: Jotaro Kujo, Dio Brando, etc.)
I. JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure
↳ Part 1: Jonathan Joestar, Robert E. O. Speedwagon, Dio Brando, Erina Pendleton.
↳ Part 2: Joseph Joestar (platonic only), Caesar Zeppeli, Lisa Lisa, Suzi Q, Kars, Esidisi, Wamuu.
↳ Part 3: Jotaro Kujo, Muhammad Avdol, Noriaki Kakyoin, Jean Pierre Polnareff, Hol Horse, N’Doul, Mariah.
↳ Part 4: Josuke Higashikata, Okuyasu Nijimura, Koichi Hirose, Rohan Kishibe, Mikitaka Hazekura, Yuya Fungami, Yukako Yamagishi, Tonio Trussardi, Yoshikage Kira.
↳ Part 5: Giorno Giovanna, Bruno Bucciarati, Leone Abbacchio, Guido Mista, Narancia Ghirga, Pannacotta Fugo, Trish Una, Diavolo/Doppio, Risotto Nero, Prosciutto, Melone, Ghiaccio.
↳ Part 6: Jolyne Cujoh, Ermes Costello, Foo Fighters, Weather Report, Narciso Anasui, Gwess, Enrico Pucci, Miraschon.
↳ Part 7: Johnny Joestar, Gyro Zeppeli, Diego Brando, Hot Pants, Mountain Tim, Funny Valentine.
(Once again; the rest mentioned is only on occasion for the time being. I will also update the list below more in the future)
II. Cowboy Bebop
↳ Spike Spiegel, Faye Valentine, Jet Black.
III. Ouran High School Host Club
↳ Haruhi Fujioka, Tamaki Suoh, Kyoya Ootori, Hikaru Hitachiin, Kaoru Hitachiin, Takashi Morinozuka.
IV. The Way of the Househusband
↳ Tatsu, Masa.
V. Baldur’s Gate 3
↳ Lae’zel, Shadowheart, Astarion, Gale, Wyll, Karlach, Halsin, Minthara, Raphael.
#my writing rules#jojo’s bizarre adventure#cowboy bebop#ouran high school host club#the way of the house husband
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𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: ~4,5k
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: You don’t have a high tolerance for alcohol. You’ll regret that tomorrow but now you can just tell your sugar daddy what an asshole he is. Or… Ransom’s getting back what belongs to him.
𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩: Sugar Daddy!Ransom Drysdale x Sugar Baby!Fem!Reader
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: dub-con (just to be safe); somnophilia (but reader wakes up and wants it so you know…); angst; heartbroken; drinking alcohol; some flirting; explicit language; explicit sexual content; a rollercoaster of emotions (like really); possessive behaviour; some aggression (not against reader); fighting; smut; pussy eating; sex talk; piv sex; vaginal penetration; daddy kink; (let me know if I forgot something)
𝐚/𝐧: So… I may get a little longer with this one than I intended to at first. Also, it took me more time than I wish it would but I'm really proud of this fic. Thank you all for the incredible feedback I got from you!! <3 Also, I will start doing taglist, let me know if you want to be added!!
This is part 2 of 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐞
if you want to be added and be notified of any of my fics, please fill this form out
you can find my masterlist here
If you read and like my fics - please give a like, leave a comment and reblog so other people can find it ♥
(badly checked; all mistakes are mine)
My blog is 18+ only!! MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!! The warning is given, you are responsible for what you read
𝐄𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲!!
“I think I’m in love with you.” You looked up at him. You weren’t the person to talk so freely about any of your feelings or emotions. Ransom was neither but his changeless silence was killing you from the inside. It wasn’t a good omen.
You didn’t even notice when tears appeared in your eyes, then went down - wetting your cheeks. Everything was too much for you to handle. You felt weak when he was like this - so closed and distant.
“You do what?” His expression showed nothing. Ransom was like a damn stone - you couldn’t read anything from him. And that hurt you. More than you could ever think. “Y/n…” He has never used your full name, only when he was angry or disappointed. “Are you stupid or something?” He pushed you off of him, your body end up on the too cold for your liking bed. It was always too freeze when he wasn’t near you. “I don’t love anyone but myself. I thought you understood that!”
You felt heartbroken. He didn’t love you back. He didn’t need you. Not like you needed him. God, how someone can be so stupid?! Regretting took better of you. “Ransom, please…” You didn’t even know what you have been pleading for. “Just forget about it! I didn’t think clearly, I didn’t mean that! I…” Tears were flowing down your reddish cheeks.
He didn’t let you finish. You could just watch him stand up off of the bed, looking for his strewn around clothes. Ransom got dressed, he didn’t look at you - even for a second. “Don’t call my number ever again.”
That was the only thing he said before he left. You truly were fucked.
------------------------
Time went on. Second after second, minute after minute, hour after hour, day after day. He didn’t show up at your apartment even once. Ransom remove you from his life. You didn’t feel any better. Couldn’t feel any better. The love of your life didn’t want you. How could you just forget about it?
You were at risk of being expelled from college. You haven’t shown up at the university even for a damn minute after that feral night. The only thing you could do was lie down on your bed. The smell of him was still noticeable at the shirt you were wearing all the time. It was healing your shattered nerves a little.
Your obsessive thoughts were interrupted by the loud sound of an incoming call. Reluctantly, you lifted yourself up, resting your weight on your elbows. You wiped your swollen eyes and only then glanced at the phone lying next to you. It was Marta - your best friend. You met her because of him.
You wondered for a moment whether to answer or not, but you couldn’t just get her out of your life. She was like a sister to you. Always kind and wonderful. You picked up at the last minute.
“Y/n…” Marta’s voice was quiet. She was talking to you as if you were a child. Didn’t want to scare or push you too far. She was like a ray of sunshine - hope. The most important person just after Ransom in your whole life. “I know it’s really hard for you but you can’t lock yourself because of some asshole!” There was a distinctive accent in Marta's voice.
You inhaled nervously. You knew that sooner or later she would try to get you out of your asylum. However, you did not think it would happen so quickly. “Marta, please…” You started quietly. “I’m not feeling very good. Definitely not to go to other people.”
The girl growled straight into the cell. She couldn’t stand this shit. Marta wanted to rip this motherfucker’s dick off just when she heard what he has done to your mangled heart. You didn’t deserve any of that.
“Listen...” Her voice was now strangely soft. She wasn’t the one to give up. Not then, when her best friend was going through one of the worst moments of her life. “I understand that this little piece of shit really hurt you. And I’ll make sure that he’ll regret all of that but you have to live your life!” Marta got emotional once again. “You’re young! You have to enjoy the benefits of that!”
Denying her was getting harder and harder. You didn't want her to be unhappy because of you. “Please…” Marta started again. “Just one drink!” You could sense the excitement with which she said those words.
“Just one drink!” You repeated. You couldn’t believe you succumbed to her again. “And not even one more!”
“Ahoy, captain!” She started laughing. And you did too. She was your sunshine after all.
------------------------
Wearing a red short dress, you felt like former yourself again. Make-up kept you from scaring anyone with that appearance. Bags under the eyes weren't sexy. Glossy lipstick made you way more confident.
High heels tapped loudly against the floor when you left your apartment. You will fucking entertain yourself tonight. You won’t think even for one moment about him. He won’t make you feel bad again. Thoughts drowned out everything around you. You decided that for once you can allow yourself to be forgotten for a moment. You only have one life in the end…
------------------------
“God, you’re gorgeous!” Marta squealed at the sight of you. “I’ve missed so much this side of you!” She was extremely happy that she finally managed to get you out of your bed. Her only job today was to make herself and you unconscious drunk. She decided to make sure that you relaxed. No dick could stop her, not even Ransom.
You just smiled at her words. For the first time in days. Maybe that was a good idea after all. Definitely better than rotting alone in bed. “I’m glad you persuaded me to do this.”
It wasn't even two minutes and you were already at the bar. Marta ordered five shots for each of you. It was just the beginning of your night.
It was wonderful to live life to the fullest again. Pretend you're not heartbroken. You knew the grey reality would come back the next day. But now you can do everything in your power to forget about the man who unlawfully broke into your heart and decided to tear it out without any qualms.
“C’mon dance!” Marta tried to shout over music that was much too loud for your liking. You didn’t think much about it. She took one of your hands and walked you both to the dance floor.
When Marta heard her favourite Rihanna’s song she squealed with joy. The beat only turned her up even more. It was the perfect opportunity for you to entertain yourself.
The woman winked at some guy and called him out. It really took your breath away when he came towards you. He was handsome. Incredibly handsome. But there was one weakness in a guy you just met. He wasn’t him.
After a while, the three of you danced together, rubbing against each other from time to time. You rejected any remorse you felt. He probably didn't even think about you, so why should you torture yourself?
------------------------
Another day and Ransom was soaking. What went awry in your relationship? He didn’t know that. Always thought that everything was great between you. The perfect solution for both of you. Well… He was wrong.
There wasn’t even one minute that he wasn’t thinking about you. Your pretty smile, incredibly e/c eyes. You were his little perfect angel. He wanted you to be next to him, tell him that everything will be okay.
Ransom wondered if you were thinking about him. You probably did. Not once, when he drove past your apartment, he would stop in the parking lot and glance at the windows. The man wanted to come in and tell you he understood his mistake. That you were not indifferent to him either.
Ransom never thought that he was capable to love someone other than himself. Not with parents like that, but then you showed up and everything went to fuck. He had a solid future. A job at his grandfather's publishing house. But everything seemed insufficient without you by his side.
Furiously, he threw his glass against the apartment wall. The white paint was stained with remnants of alcohol, but Ransom couldn't care less then. His heart screamed at him what of an idiot he had been for spurning you and your feelings away. He knew perfectly well that they were sincere. Still, he couldn't appreciate them at that moment.
Without thinking about the consequences, he pulled out his phone and dialled your number. Ransom needed to hear your beautiful voice. You were like a cure for all evil to him. When he was with you, he couldn't think of anything else. But of course, he had to screw everything up - as always.
Already on the second ring, he gave up any hope. Why would you want to talk to him now? Ransom knew that he treated you like shit then, leaving with a bang on the door, even though he knew how difficult it was for you to openly talk about feelings and emotions. You were the same after all. Like two drops of water.
For the first time in many years, he cried like a baby. He couldn't bear the feeling of his heart falling apart. The worst thing was that he had earned such a fate himself.
------------------------
Three tequilas. It took you three tequilas to dare to do what you have not been able to bring yourself to do for a long time. You called Ransom. You called motherfucking Ransom. The prick that broke your heart and left it in pieces.
You wanted to tell him how much you miss him. How much you would like to never meet him. He hurt you so bad but you still couldn’t hate him. You didn’t know how to live without him near you. It was too hard - thinking about him all the time.
You were standing outside the club Marta brought you to. You needed to sober up a little. The cumulating feelings were the reason why you couldn’t stop yourself from dialling his number. You didn't allow yourself a moment of weakness, but now you couldn't chase away the feeling of emptiness that only he could fill. When you saw that Ransom was trying to call you himself - something broke inside of you.
“Y/n?” He sounded surprised. For even a moment he didn't think you might want to talk to him. Not after what he did to your poor heart. “Everythings alright?”
Although you left the loud club, Ransom could hear the noise. The thought that you were having a good time without him couldn't leave the man alone. He knew he couldn't blame you for it. It was his fault only.
“Yeah, never been better!” You laughed at the phone. He already knew that you were lying. He recognized the weird tone of your voice. High pitched tone that you had when you were at the last moment from breaking down. “I’m way better without you, Ransom!” You said with a fake smile on your face.
His heart shattered. You didn’t mean that. You couldn’t. You were drunk and didn’t know what you’re talking about.
“Y/n, listen...” He started. “I think we should talk when you’ll sober up.” The thought that you can never forgive him was tearing a man apart. Ransom needed you to function normally. You were his little angle - his only support, the cure for everything bad. And he fucked this whole thing up.
“We have nothing to talk about, asshole!” Your nerves took better of you, couldn’t stop without telling him everything you thought right then. “You broke my fucking heart, you left when I told you how I was feeling about us both!” The tears appeared in your eyes but you wouldn't let them out. It wasn’t time for your fondness. “I would fucking die for you! But you would never do the same for me! You’re just a fucking prick that wanted to get his dick wet.”
Ransom wasn’t too strong that night. Your words made him cry. How could he treat you like this?! You deserved a word but the only thing he left you was a broken heart. “Honey…” He wanted to tell you that he loved you as well. Maybe even as much as you loved him. But it stuck in his throat.
“But you know what, bastard?” You wanted him to suffer. Make him feel things you felt when he was playing with your doll heart. “I’ve met someone new. And he's way better than you!” Your laugh only added to his pain. He felt as if he was about to die and you weren’t there to keep him in your arms. You were his judge. And you just wrote it at a loss. “With him, I don’t have to simulate my orgasms. He can make me feel real good!”
Ransom clenched his jaw. Even one thought about you with someone else made him see red. He was the only man that could touch you. You were his. And he was about to remind you that.
“You’re walking on thin ice, sweetheart.” Ransom reprimanded you. “Don’t forget the nights we had together. I don’t think you could fake these little noises of yours.” Your breath started to get sharp. “And the way you were clenching around me… Just like a glove!”
“For your information…” You couldn’t miss the opportunity to make him suffer a little more. “I’m not wearing any underwear.” The way Ransom cursed under his breath told you that you hit just a right spot. The one that hurt him the most. “And I’m just about to fuck him in a dingy toilet of the club.” Your smirk was so big - your lips started to get achy. “Hope you’ll get just as pleasant night as me!” After that, you’ve just hung up and made your way back to the club. You found Marta in the large crowd of people and started dancing. You weren’t thinking about Ransom anymore.
------------------------
Ransom called a cab almost immediately. He needed to get to the club as soon as possible. He wasn’t thinking about what he’ll do when he would arrive. The only thing he knew - was that you were going home with him that night.
His steps were decisive and very quick. Ransom needed to see you right and then. His nerves were on the very edge. You made him feel things he never thought he could feel. He acted like some crazy psycho but he couldn’t care less.
When he entered the club, the scent of sweat and horny people disgusted him for the first time in his whole life. It was his main meeting place with friends, but it seemed pointless at the time. The only right place to be in was his living room’s couch and you in his broad arms.
Ransom was so angry at you for making him that way. He looked around the room impatiently, but couldn't see you anywhere. When he was about to give up and return to the apartment, he suddenly noticed a red dress, exactly as he gave you for the anniversary of your cooperation.
His eyesight almost immediately travelled up your figure. The fabric perfectly hugged all your curves. The breasts were perfectly emphasized, he could not take his eyes off them. You looked so beautiful. And you weren’t dressed like this for him. This fact was like a knife stuck right in the heart. Ransom barely contained the anger that hit him the moment he saw some guy shamelessly grab you by the hips and pull you even closer.
He was about to intervene when all of a sudden you started to grab a stranger’s hands and made your own way with them all over your exposed body. You liked his touch on you. Ransom couldn’t believe that.
All he could see was read when he came over to you both. The feelings overwhelmed him when he pulled the man with an aggressiveness he hadn’t felt in a long time.
“What the fuck?!” Your voice brought him down to earth. You were shocked when you saw that the man who interrupted your dance was Ransom himself. “What are you doing here?!” You thought you were going to tear him apart when a rude smirk appeared on his lips. He liked all the fuss too much for your liking.
“I’m your prince charming and I’m saving you from this piece of shit.” His shit like grinning what making you even more frustrated. Even in a situation like that he was a fucking asshole. “You need me and my help!”
You scoffed at his words. “I don’t need shit from you, you prick!” All you could see was damn red. He was fucking with your feelings. Again. “I’m a grown-up woman and I can handle myself real good!”
“If I can say something…” The guy you were dancing with interrupted your exchange. He tried to stand up but the foot that Ransom put on his chest interfered with it.
“No, you cannot!” Ransom clenched his fits and grind out. “Get the fuck out of my way if you don’t want a broken nose!”
Andy, you that was his name, or maybe Ari had a scared expression on his face. He stood up too quickly and stumbled a little. Then he looked and you, but when he heart an angry grow from Ransom, he turned tail and left you alone with the jackass.
“So…” Ransom started. “Now that he finally butted out, we can talk like humans!”
You laughed loudly at his words. He sometimes could be funny. “Are you stupid?!” The look on his face had changed. “I do not want to talk with someone like you!”
“Like me?” He asked after.
“Like you.” You nodded. “Someone who’s playing with your heart only you to leave it alone when he’s tired of your damn vagina!”
A few heads turned your way. Maybe you said that a little too loud. But you could not give a damn fuck about it. Not when he was making an even bigger fool of himself.
Ransom had enough of that. He grabbed you by your waist and flipped you onto his shoulder like you weight nothing.
“Put me down, you fucking asshole!” You were yelling and pounding your fists into his back but he did nothing about that. Ransom was walking to the exit of the club, then to his car. “I swear to god if you don’t put me down right now, I’m gonna…”
He interrupted you by smacking your ass a few times. “I’m all ears…” He laughed at you. “What you’re gonna do?” He earned only a groan of helplessness from you. “Tell me!”
“Fuck you!” You hit his back again. You were just about to start another round of yelling when all of nothing you were threw in a passenger seat of Ransom’s Bentley.
The travel to his house was long, so after just a few minutes, you were fast asleep.
------------------------
Ransom knew that was not good. Pretty bad to be clear. You were so mad at him, but he still couldn’t help himself. Your body lying so close to his.
Just after a few seconds, the man found his place between your thighs. His hands gripped your flesh spreading your legs even wider, then ripped your cute panties to pieces and got to work.
For the start, his tongue movement was slow and steady. He hummed when he felt your pussy realising even more liquid. You bucked your hips a little, rubbing yourself against his face. Ransom looked up at you. You were still sleeping.
He showed a finger inside of you, his mouth balanced over your sweet pussy. He was looking at your face the whole time. You were moaning this whole time but didn’t wake up.
Maybe he was doing it wrong? Ransom smirked. His fingers shifted, fucking into you from a different angle. His palm was soaked with your juices.
Just when he was about to bring to an orgasm you woke up with a loud groan of pleasure. You felt confused at first, but when he continued to make you feel good - you couldn’t say no. He was too good at that. Ransom moved away from your pussy.
“Good morning, honey…” He said with a playful smirk on his handsome face. “Still mad at me?”
You didn’t say anything, just nod. “Hmm…” He pretended to wonder. “Maybe I should try harder?” The smile he gave you then, almost brought you to a heart attack. “But I cannot do that if you won’t beg a little, princess…”
You couldn’t stop yourself. “Ransom, please…” You smiled charmingly at him. “Make me feel good, only you can do that.”
“That’s not my name, princess.” He said grabbing your cheeks, making your lips fish-like. “What you should call me?”
“Daddy.” You kissed the back of his palm. “I should call you daddy.” You clarified.
“That’s right, baby.” Ransom gave your head a few pats. “Now, I can get back to work.”
His fingers started fucking into you at the brutal tempo. Your moanings and groanings filled the whole room. You missed him and his talented limbs. You didn’t need too much time to get to a climax. Only he could do that this fast.
“Cum for me, princess.” Ransom encouraged. “Do that for daddy.”
He made you hit your peak. “Daddy!” You yelled, falling against the cushions of his bed, trying to catch your breath.
“Mmmm…” Ransom started. “I’m so proud of my little baby.” He kissed your sweaty forehead.
“That was good.” You said after you got back to yourself from your mind-blowing orgasm. “But we still need to talk, Ransom.” Your voice was serious and intense.
“Yeah, yeah…” He had nothing of that. “But that’s not happening until I fuck your brain out.”
Ransom didn’t waste his time, almost immediately he got rid of his sweatpants. You looked down at his impressive cock. He was turning on even from watching you get your pleasure.
His growing erection was rubbing your clit as you grasped his arms tightly. “I’m gonna make you feel so good you won’t remember your damn name.” Ransom promised, kissing your forehead as his cock pushed into you.
You hooked your legs around his narrow waist, pulling him even deeper. He put his hands on your cheeks, rubbing them softly. Ransom’s head dropped to rest in the crook of your neck, kissing and biting love marks onto your sensitive skin. “Your body is so god damn precious, honey.”
You moaned his name, so loud, you were sure that the neighbours could hear it. But you were way too far gone in your pleasure to worry about things like that. “You will feel me for days, baby.” He promised. “I’ll make sure of it!”
Ransom grunted, giving your cunt a few more deep thrusts before he was pulling away. You whined your disappointment, but then he entered you once again with so much strength you thought you were seeing stars.
You shooked your head and closed your eyes as you felt the knot in your stomach tightening. Ransom’s breath hitched, announcing his imminent orgasm.
You didn’t need much time. After a few more moves of his, you were at the edge of cumming again. Ransom kissed your lips softly. His tempo was brutal but you loved every second of that.
“God, you feel so fucking good.” The man whispered into your ear. “Pussy so warm and so fucking tight.” His thrusts were even deeper and faster. “Only for me.”
“For you.” You repeated. “Only for you, daddy.”
He kissed your forehead. “That’s my good girl.” You smiled at his praise.
Ransom was stretching you out so sweetly, you couldn’t help but clench around his dick. He groaned and bit your shoulder. The sting from the wound didn't interest you very much.
His hips slapped against you and the pain-pleasure centre in your brain goes haywire. You moaned his name and begged him to go even harder. So he did that.
Ransom licked his thumb and dropped it to your achy clit. He purred into your ear: “Gimme another one, baby.” You were so close to cumming. His words only added to your pleasure. “I want everyone in this town to fucking hear you!”
A keening cry fell from your swollen lips with every slap of his hips against your own. You got louder and louder from second to second. Your nails dig into his shoulder, as you cum with a howl.
He followed close behind you. You felt like you were floating, the feeling so good, making you see stars. Ransom cursed under his breath. His cum flooding your still fluttering cunt. Both you and he could feel it leaking out around his cock.
The man gave your pussy a few more hard thrusts. He sagged next to you, catching his breath. Ransom was laying like this for a little, then pulled his soft dick out of you.
He stood up from the bed. You felt your eyes getting glassy, he was leaving you again. “Where are you going?” You asked with a broken voice. He didn't say a word, just make his way to the bathroom.
After a minute or two, Ransom came back with a wet towel in his hands. He cleaned your lower parts with so much love and affection you thought you were dreaming, and he wasn’t real.
“Baby…” The man started. “I have to tell you how sorry I am for treating you like that before.”
You looked up at him. “Ransom, look…”
“No.” He stopped you. He needed to tell you everything from the beginning. “Y/n, I was scared because no one before you was so good to me. You know how my parents are. I acted like a complete dick, and you don’t know how sorry I am because of that.”
Ransom took a deep breath and continued: “I used to have a girl a day, but I want and need you to stay.”
You couldn’t believe the words he was saying. This really felt like a dream to you. “I love you, baby so, so much.” He got even closer. “I can’t lose you, only with you next to me - my life means something.”
You kissed his lips tenderly. Your feelings were mutual. “I love you, daddy.” You said playfully. “So, so much.”
Ransom couldn’t believe his happiness. He got everything he needed. You near him.
#ransom drysdale x you#ransom drysdale smut#ransom drysdale#ransom thrombey x reader#ransom smut#ransom drysdale x reader#ransom drydale x you#chris evans fluff#chris evans x you#chris evans imagine#ransom thrombrey#smut#ransom drysdale x female reader#ransom drysdale au#ransom thrombey fanfic#ransom thrombey x you#chris evans characters#chris evans smut#chris evans fic#chris evans#chris evans angst#ransom x reader#ransom note#hugh drysdale#my fic#fiction#fan fic#drabble#chris evans drabble#chris evans headcanon
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Obsessed
Pairing: Stalker!Min Yoongi x Original female character
Tags: Forced relationships, Hurt/Comfort, Manipulations, Mentions of cruelty, Mentions of deaths, Mentions of drugs, Murders, Original female character, Out of character, Stalking, Unhealthy relationships, Violence.
Summary: She wasn't afraid of this man, didn't take threats seriously, blaming everything on the fact that it was just to attract attention. However, she did’t know what he was capable of.
word count: 1,5k
I do not condone the actions described in the story, this is all fiction and does not relate to the real members of the BTS in any way. If you are uncomfortable with tags, please do not read!! Or read at your own risk.
a/n: Thanks to the wonderful author who allowed me to translate this work! Please keep in mind that English is not my native language, so if you notice any mistakes, point them out to me! I can also edit the chapter after I publish it, so don't be surprised if you see some strange moments (it means I haven't corrected them yet). Thank you.
source: https://ficbook.net/readfic/12255891
Chaper 1 , Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , Chapter 4 , Chapter 5 , Chapter 6 , Chapter 7 , Chapter 8
"Now you've realized that it's better to listen to my advice?"
“Bye, baby!” She said hugging her niece, “Text-call, don't forget, okay?” She asked, smiling.
"Okay," the girl replied, smiling shyly. “Bye,” the little girl added, waving, then took her father by the hand and disappeared through the door.
A second later, the smile vanished from Percy's face. Sighing heavily, she wandered to her room. Flopping down on the bed, the girl stared at the ceiling, unable to say anything. For two days she had to smile all the time and indulge the desires of the child. As much as she loved Kim, Percy liked the comfort and solitude more.
She had a lot of plans for the rest of the day, but the phone vibrated, notifying that today she can forget about peace and quiet. Taking the smartphone in her hands, the girl unlocked it, and then went into the messages.
From: Shin
11:26 "Hi. Are you in today?"
To: Shin
11:27 "Hi. I don't know, I'm very tired :/"
From: Shin
11:28 "Oh shit"
11:28 "I've been texting for two months now"
11:29 "Is it so fucking hard for you to go out for an hour??"
Turning off the smartphone, the girl buried her face in the pillow.
“I’m so sick of them” crying, she shouted into the pillow. “Why do they forget that I am also a human being? I don't give a damn about your dreams of a car, a wedding in Paris, buying a new phone.” continuing to cry, Percy slurred into the pillow. Now she was referring to Shin, who always talked only about himself and wasn't even interested in his friend's condition.
The girl was stopped from crying by the sound of another notification. She was madly angry and upset, so she was going to tell Shin everything that had accumulated. Wiping away tears, Percy picked up her smartphone and turned it on again. However, the message was not from a friend.
From: Weirdo
11:32 "I have never been so tormented by a woman's crying"
11:33 "Do you want me to explain to him clearly that you are not in the mood to go for a walk today?"
The girl stared at the screen for a long time and reread the messages, biting her lips. Everything was tightening inside, because it was incomprehensible what this man was capable of. However, he is the only one who cares about her in any way.
To: Weirdo
11:34 "Can you really?"
The girl nervously tapped her fingernail on the screen, waiting for him to answer.
From: Weirdo
11:35 "Of course, you just have to ask :)"
Percy thought for a long time whether to ask for help from a stalker who has been haunting her for several months now. What would he do for her? — Everything, she only has to tell about her desire. From the side of this man, threats have repeatedly come in the direction of male friends, but he has never done anything. He warned Percy not to communicate with "suspicious personalities", and when the girl ignored this, he sent videos and messages that made goosebumps run through her body.
To: Weirdo
11:37 "I want"
11:38 "I want you to tell him to leave me alone so that he never appears in my life again"
Percy waited a long time for the answer, but it did not come. He just read the messages and fell silent.
The girl threw the phone aside and decided not to bother her head with this situation. He's not going to kill him, after all, right? Or?..
***
Sitting in the kitchen and finishing her dinner, Percy thought that she should apologize to Shin for her vagary. The girl finally came back to normal, the emotions inside stopped raging. Picking up the phone and turning off the film, she went to Contacts to dial Shin.
The first beep,
the second,
the third,
the fourth...
“Offended?” Percy asked herself, taking the phone away from her ear. “It seems so.” exhaling, she added.
However, Percy was not going to give up. She knew perfectly well that Shin does not know how to take offense for a long time, so she needs to go till the end.
Dialing the number again, the girl was already preparing for a long beep, but as soon as the first one sounded, he answered the call.
“Hello, Shin?” The answer was silence, which made Percy a little tense. “I’m sorry that everything turned out this way. I was emotional, really very tired, so I answered like that. We can go for a walk tomorrow, just don't be offended ... “but the girl didn't finish because the call was dropped.
“What kind of impudence is that? I'm sorry, but he's acting like a child.” Percy said with displeasure, dialing the number again.
“The subscriber's device is turned off or is outside the network coverage area.” the speaker said.
"Well, fuck you, take offense," Percy thought with a snort, turning on the film again. "He will get over it and call himself"
The girl decided to take offense in response, completely forgetting that she asked for help from him. Something inside her suggested that something terrible might have happened, but Percy dismissed such thoughts.
very bad idea
***
Until the evening, Percy did what she had been going to do for a long time. It's summer, the best time of the year! The girl had been planning to sort out her closets for a long time and get rid of unnecessary things. It is difficult to call it fun, but it is necessary to conduct a revision. After putting all the "junk" in boxes, Percy began to carry them to the attic. As they say: "out of sight — out of mind."
This is not the only thing that Percy has been planning to finish for a long time. The girl finally printed out photos of her favorite actors and hung them on the wall; made cheesecake; continued to keep her diary, tried to decorate the pages in an unusual way. There were more than enough plans, so Percy decided to leave some for tomorrow, so as not to "die of boredom."
***
It was getting dark outside. This meant that the parents would be coming soon. Percy went to the kitchen to heat up the food and put the kettle on.
Digging into her smartphone, the girl did not immediately hear a knock at the door. Only after the bell rang did Percy run into the hallway.
“Why don't you let your parents in?”
“I'm letting you in,” the girl replied with a grin. “I just didn't hear it right away.”
“Have you watched the news?” Sitting down at the table, her father asked.
“No, what's there?” Percy asked, looking up from the phone.
"Daughter, just don't be nervous," the mother began, nervously biting her lip. "Shin's mom called me," Percy nodded, not understanding what her mother was leading to. “He went to the grocery store, but he never returned home.”
Percy stood bug-eyed, and her heart ached painfully. His words immediately hit her thoughts: "Do you want me to explain to him clearly that you are not in the mood to go for a walk today?" Goosebumps began to run over her body, and her hands were shaking slightly.
“Since lunch, the news is only about the disappearance of Shin,” coughing, the head of the family intervened in the conversation. The man immediately noticed how Percy turned pale and it seemed that she was about to faint.
“Darling, don't worry,” — taking the girl by the hand, said the mother. — They will definitely find him, the police are moving heaven and earth.
Percy nodded with a crooked smile, then pressed her hand to herself.
"But I don't think so anymore," she thought, getting up from her chair and heading into the room.
Panic covered Percy's head, preventing her from thinking straight. The body did not obey, and the heart beat a frantic rhythm. The girl has already regretted a million times that she asked him for help.
Entering the room and closing the door behind her, the girl slid down the wall to the floor, breathing convulsively. It was as if someone's hands were squeezing her throat, blocking access to oxygen.
The sound of the notification made the girl flinch. Picking up the smartphone with shaking hands, Percy turned it on.
From: Weirdo
21:34 "I did as you wished. I was counting on minimal gratitude, but in return I get this"
In addition to the text, there was a photo of Percy sitting on the floor, and the expression on her face was speaking for itself.
To: Weirdo
21:35 "I didn't want you to"
21:35 "What did you ever do to him??"
From: Weirdo
21:36 "You wanted me to)"
21:37 "You wanted me to get rid of him"
To: Weirdo
21:38 "I wanted you to EXPLAIN it to him in words!"
21:38 "You're insane!"
21:39 "Monster!"
21:39 "Psyco!"
Percy went cold, her whole body was shaking, and tears began to gather in the corners of her eyes.
From: Weirdo
21:41 "Be careful with your expressions, Percy"
21:42 "Even my angelic patience tends to run out"
21:43 "Next time, formulate your wish more precisely so that it doesn't turn out the way it is now"
21:44 "Oh, yeah... now you've realized that it's better to listen to my advice?"
to be continued...
#yandere bts#yandere youngi#yoongi x reader#yandere x reader#bts x reader#stalker yoongi#yandere kpop#bts yandere#btsyandere#yandere bangtan#kpop yandere#yandere#yandere au#bts#bts fanfic
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A Jar Of Stars
╔═════ ∘◦ ☆ ◦∘ ══════╗
Pairing: Thomas Raggi x Reader (she/her)
Requested: Yes (by the absolutely amazing @hiraetheral)
Summary: Thomas comforts his girlfriend after her eating disorder gets out of hand once again.
Warnings: Mentions of eating disorders
A/N: I want to make this very clear once again! This story contains mentions of ED, if you think this will trigger you, please don’t read. There’s plenty of other Thom/Maneskin fics on here and all over Tumblr, that you can enjoy. Now to anyone who has decided to read regardless, please know that an ED won’t make you appear any more interesting or lovable, I am writing this as it’s something I am struggling with right now and needed some comfort. Please, if you have/had an ED know you aren’t alone! (Just so you guys know, i haven’t proofread this, so if you notice any mistakes feel free to notify me :) )
Sending you all the love,
Axe <3
Tags: @wasteddoubts @teenyweenynightghost @wannabemarlenabutiscoraline @cheese-toastie-11 @unitersmoonshine @selenophiliaxx @mywritingonlyfans @l0standn0tf0und (if you’d like to be removed from the tags feel free to tell me :) )
© 2021-2022 @idyllicbutterfly on Tumblr All Rights Reserved
Add yourself to my taglist - Check out my other stories
╚═════ ∘◦ ❉ ◦∘ ══════╝
A single light bulb, bottom screwed tightly onto the golden socket, emitted its gloomy lustre into the foyer. The black canvas tote bag landed on the ash floor; the perfume bottle, poetry compilation magazines and wallet inside of it hitting the ground with a loud thump.
Clamorous, London bubbled outside the white window. Scratched-up glass giving the view of the concrete jungle swallowing people whole. Y/N’s October orbs lingered upon the windowsill; a checkered shirt and a half-smoked pack of Red Marlboro’s. The fabric felt soft against her fingertips; a meadow filled with dandelions bathing in the honey sunlight. Bourbon, Orange Flower and Amber invading her nostrils.
Gas flame-coloured sweater dropped next to the discarded items. Body - bones jutting out, hair - dull and thin. Y/N caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror that stood by the Alder front door. Bitter tears streamed down her face, Rhône and Arve confluencing on her neck. She felt all the little bacterias in her stomach fighting over the toast and scrambled eggs she had for breakfast.
Awareness. She grew aware of every small organism in her; how they breathed, drank, ate. The overwhelming realization that she in fact was a home to much more than just a skeleton and a few organs made her breathing rapid. The click of an argent lighter and the taste of campfire mixed with chemicals - the only escape.
- Amore, I’m back! - Voice, as delicate as the autumn breeze; the perfect balance between summer-hearth and winter-sun. Thomas swiftly untied his shoelaces, leather boots now sitting on the metall rack; sock-covered feet scurried against the floor, with gentle thuds.
- Hi, baby! - Y/N giggled as the boy planted an abundance of macaron pecks all over her face; his copper hair tickling her neck. His slender fingers wrapped around the coffin nail, lips embracing the white stick, right where the scarlet marks of the girl’s lipstick were. After he exhaled, smoke spread around the air; little clouds slowly evaporated; the cigarette found its place back against the woman’s tongue.
- I got us some Amatriciana. Oh, and I went to that little bakery at the corner to get us some of those biscuits you like. - Just then the chestnut-haired girl spotted the teal bag on the coffee table.
- Thank you, love, but I am not really hungry. - The lie stung like a cicada killer on the apple of her rosy cheek.
The same sentence, just a different month. Thomas looked at Y/N's face and it broke him to recall how it once was. Her eyes used to remind him of hot cocoa and whipped cream; the scent of freshly baked sugar cookies and firewood, but now - they were blank. Now her once soft skin was stretched over her skull. Just eighteen and she had health as fragile as the one of someone who was eighty or more, her organs packing up one by one. He remembered how a year ago upon seeing him she turned her face to the hospital window, her pointed way of showing anger at herself, at the sunlight, at her brain. The only reason she didn't rip the tubes away was because doing so resulted in being strapped to the bed. "Anorexic" hardly seemed a big enough word to describe what had become of the love of his life.
A pair of warm arms sneaked around her waist once more.
- Why, amore? Why? - The dams behind Y/N’s eyes broke open, a new flow of tears making her collar bones glisten.
- Please, don’t leave me! - Her voice was on the brink, almost as if there was a blade pressed against her throat.
- Love, I would never. - A human shield embrace. He was there with her; for her. His choice was clear; it was the brunette girl.
Long, nude nails scratched up and down the exposed skin of her left wrist. She was anxious. The boy picked up on what was going on.
- Amore, stop doing that! You’ll hurt yourself! - Thomas’ hand stopped Y/N’s, lifting it up to his lips, placing wet kisses against the plastic-like skin. - C’mon. I’ll put on a movie and we’ll cuddle. And if you want to then we can talk.
***
The pieces of her torn heart that had been struggling to fit into this world, screaming to be accepted became quiet as she cuddled with him; it was as if they had found peace, as if they needed him to bridge their gaps and connect. The lilac blanket brought additional warmth to the couple. Y/N’s eyes fell to the jar full of star-shaped glitter.
- I want to change. I will go talk to the therapist tomorrow. - The guitarist knew what she meant. Small wrinkles formed by his eyes as he smiled.
- That’s great news, amore. That’s great news. - A kiss was planted against the top of her head.
***
The lake in lustrous indigo and verdant, an enthusiastic canvas for leaden mountain tops, sprinkled with powdered sugar-like snow and saxe skies, brought its own artistic watercolour effect to the daytime. His kiss was steeped in a passion that ignites. It was the promise of realness.
- I don’t want you to go. - Truth broke through the silence, like a hammer through an ice statue.
- I don’t want to go either. - He let her nuzzle closer to him.
- I’m scared. - Razors tracing over skin.
- I know. But I promise, I’ll keep your heart safe. - Fifteen. He had repeated the same thing fifteen times already, and he’d do it a thousand more for her.
- What if you don’t? I mean what if you fade away and then I am left with your name popping up every time I type a “T”, or our pictures in my gallery and your voice in my recordings and… - The same fear that riddled her eating habits, that got her to be in a hospital until two days ago, now sprinkled on her picture perfect relationship, because she was scared it almost seemed too perfect.
- No. I am not going anywhere. I will chase you to the moon and back, if I have to. - Words much more than a promise. - Actually… - A jar of shiny stars covered in golden foil was pushed into her palms. - Here. According to the Japanese, when you fold lucky stars and give them to your loved ones, only good will follow them, love and change.
- Thank you. - Y/N tucked a fallen strand of blond hair behind his ear. - I love you. - But she knew no words could convey what she actually felt inside; a hushed feeling that had become a part of the oxygen she needed to breathe.
- I love you, too.
#thomas raggi#thomas raggi imagine#thomas raggi x reader#thomas raggi fanfiction#maneskin#maneskin fanfiction#maneskin x reader#maneskin imagine#maneskin fanfic
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Hi I posted an ask regarding your view point on GGDD's safety by people shipping them openly by bus designs, digital hoardings in their country and various other ways. I am not sure if you have already replied because I can't seem to find it. If not, please notify in case you would be interested in posting, there is no pressure or complaints if the answer is not affirmative. Also, I am hoping to read your piece on current issue DD is facing in relation to Nike. I am sure a lot of people enjoy your straight, detailed and analytical thought process and information presentation. A lot of people especially ifans needs to understand the perspective and position an actor or any national level influencer/celebrity is in when they are a citizen of totalitarian regime.
I would love to read, if you decide to write.
Thank you for your blog. It is highly appreciated and welcomed.
Hello Anon! I sincerely apologise ~ my ask box has been very full, and I answer based on time availability (which isn’t much) and “urgency” of the matter (for example, the recent post on Dangai/WoH skipped the line because it’s current). My whim too, occasionally and admittedly; sometimes I’d like to take a breather and talk about something a little more fannish and fun (like window cleaning robots!) Above all, I prefer giving delayed but responsible, or even no answers over irresponsible ones, given some of the subject matter I touch upon. I’ll ... probably have to write up an ask box policy at some point.
Now, my thoughts about Dd’s current situation ... or maybe, my thoughts about the things around it ...
I should explain where my highly disorganised thoughts this time come from first. I’m a Hong Konger by birth, and I grew up at a time when it was still conventional for Hong Kongers to refer themselves as Chinese, following the tradition of referring to the (believed) origin of one’s paternal family as our own origin. I’ve never, however, sworn allegiance to the Chinese government; the two citizenships I’ve ever held are 1) United Kingdom (Hong Kong was still a British crown colony when I was there), and 2) United States.
The distinction between China, the country, and Chinese government, as the country’s rulership, has therefore always been clear to me. You can love, feel a bond with the country, its people and culture and its 5,000 year old history, without having feeling anything with its 71 years-young government with foreign (soviet) roots. To quote Hamilton: Oceans rise, empires fall, and just the central plains of China alone went through a total of 13 recorded dynasties, during which its border waxed and waned, often splitting what is now Chinese territory into multiple countries under different rulership that sometimes split along ethnic lines—China, in that sense, isn’t even historically a country as we define one today; it’s a piece of land in East Asia where different countries have taken over, risen and fallen. And the major ethnic group, Han, which also includes the vast majority of the current political elite, wasn’t always in control. The Yuan dynasty (1271–1368) was famously built by Mongolians; the Qing dynasty (1636–1912), Manchurians. Beijing, the current capital of China, began its illustrious history as The Capital City for the non-Han based, north-of-central-plain dynasties of Liao and Jin. Liao people were believed to be either Mongolic or Tungusic. Jin people were Tungusic, and would eventually become Manchurians. Xinjiang (新疆), meanwhile, was only under the influence of the ancient Chinese empires sporadically, and its formal conquest / incorporation by a Chinese dynasty didn’t happen until ~ 1760, and by the (Manchurian) Qing dynasty. Its late incorporation is also reflected in its name that means, literally, “New Territory”.
What does this all mean? It means: 1) Loving China =/= loving the Chinese Communist Party; 2) Chinese culture =/= Han culture; especially the Han culture infused with “Core Socialist Values” as defined by the Chinese Communist Party; 3) X dynasty’s territory (where X = one of the ancient Chinese dynasties) =/= What has to be People Republic of China’s territory.
And by writing down these three =/=, which I’d argue are simply conclusions from historical facts and logic, I’ve committed an act of subversion in the eyes of the current Chinese government. Remove the “/” in “=/=“, and you’ve got three of the most important talking points of Chinese propaganda.
The sacred, un-violatable rules the Chinese government tells its people.
Why do I mention them? Because the scrutiny, the attack on Dd read familiar to me, and is probably familiar too to all those who’ve kept even a brief eye on Hong Kong and Taiwanese entertainers who work in China. When a topic that violates one of these propaganda points makes news (for example, the HK protest, Hong Kong/Taiwan Independence), entertainers from Hong Kong / Taiwan—anyone who’ve achieved name recognition—are often placed under immediate scrutiny by Chinese netizens to see whether and when they’ll confirm their loyalty towards the Chinese government. The argument is that only those who display absolute loyalty to the Chinese government deserves to earn China’s money, and the main motivation behind this scrutiny, in this case, is mistrust: Hong Kong, after all, is crawling with British loyalists and rioters according to Chinese propaganda, with separatists who’re conspiring with foreign governments to overthrow the Chinese government; the democratic island nation of Taiwan, meanwhile, is supposedly a rogue child who has escaped its mother (China) ’s arms for the past 70+ years—the child who, by the way, shall be brought to their knees (along with into their mother’s arms) by military intervention. Both places, in other words, are serial violators of =/= 1) and 3), and not to be trusted. If their entertainers fail to affirm their loyalty towards the Chinese government, or if the timing of their patriotic display is perceived as off, vicious accusations—similar to those Dd has endured—will fly, and calls for boycott begin.
Here’s a related observation, while I’m at it ... no one in c-ent is really allowed to keep their political views quiet, even if they’re not particularly well-known. No one can say, politics isn’t for me, it’s too ugly/too complicated/doesn’t fit my image and shove it under the proverbial carpet. Under an authoritarian government, control is exerted via politics, via propaganda that seeps into day-to-day language. It’s an oil slick that taints and swims in even the smallest crevice of life—there’s no where to hide.
And Dd is far more famous than almost all of these HK and Taiwan based entertainers. 表態 — a public announcement of his stance — is the only option left for him when he becomes the centre of a sensitive political issue such as this one. And there’s really only one stance he can take.
In that sense, what happened to Dd isn’t something I’m too worried about—this kind of attack under the guise of a “loyalty check” isn’t new; and the motivation behind the scrutiny of Dd is the safer to-take-down-his-career rather than political mistrust. I believe this storm shall pass soon, as long as his team doesn’t make an unexpected, big mistake. His non-fan fellow country people will probably view him with a more positive light as well: he walked the walk and did what he believed is patriotic — breaking a contract like this is no lip service when in China, performative patriotism is often lip service — reportedly even among the top Chinese Communist Party officials.
If I must find more defence for his stance ... please forgive me, Anon, but I don’t have much more to say than what I said last night, what I said before about China’s access to information—
—because, admittedly, following, talking about this incident is difficult for the Hong Konger in me, even if I’ve expected this kind of incidents from the moment I joined this fandom, even if I’ve expected, as I’ve learned from RL experience, that most people I adore in China will at some point support causes that I deeply disagree with. The online patriotic rally by c-motors and c-turtles under the associated Weibo tag, while impressive and good for Dd, is nonetheless heartbreaking/frightening for me to watch. Why? Because I know this can easily turn into a call to persecute all Hong Kongers involved in the democracy movements sometime in the future. Because I know the rally will probably be as impressive if this has been a call to persecute all Hong Kongers involved in the democracy movements. Frankly, I stopped thinking about Nike as I scrolled through the posts — I was thinking about the now impossibly wide gulf that separates most Chinese and a Hong Konger like myself; I was thinking about why a Gg / Dd performance can trend on Twitter in 10+ countries all over the world but makes almost no noise in Hong Kong or Taiwan, places that should’ve most easily fallen in love with Gg / Dd with their closeness in language and customs.
As it turns out, the closeness has only driven HK and Taiwan away; the closeness only brings them more insight of the beast—the government that looms over, cast a long shadow over everything that lives under it, including Gg and Dd.
I was reminded of the fact that many young Hong Kongers probably see me as a traitor just for being a turtle — young Hong Kongers who are n>1 generation immigrants from China, who never spend years reconciling the conflicting viewpoints, the even more conflicting emotions when it comes to this ... almost irreconcilable difference now in political beliefs north and south of the China-HK border. Unlike the older generations who often have immigrants/refugees from China for immediate, un-severable family, who often don’t have the option to walk away from the conflicts, to simply point to the other side and call it evil.
And here are my even-more-conflicting emotions:
While, over the years, I’ve learned to harbour no ill feelings to the vast majority of supporters of pro-CCP causes—I reserve blame for those who conceal the truth, who’re involved in its policy making, or people who live outside the Firewall and should know better (such as every HK entertainer who’ve expressed support)—I’ve also learned, over the same years, to be fully, painfully aware that every endorsement is still an endorsement for the regime to carry on its ways, and the damage is real, is significant even if the endorsers may not know about the true nature of their endorsements.
A simple thought experiment: the sheer size of China’s population means it can easily control the narrative on English-speaking social media. The Chinese government already has a history of mobilising its people to scale the Great Firewall and spread its propaganda on, for example, Twitter. It has also mobilised fan circles for propaganda purpose. Again, as a thought experiment *only* (ie, SJD!), imagine the Chinese government mobilising Dd’s Weibo supertopic fans to spread misinformation about Xinjiang.
Dd’s supertopic has 5+ million members—all savvy social media users and many skilled in the art of comment control (a collective effort, performed by fans to bury critiques/dissent on message boards); the total number of Uyghurs in Xinjiang is ~12 million, but their communications are heavily scrutinised and they can’t really talk. Just for the sake of argument, we’ll add the ~ 70% pro-democracy HK population to Uyghur’s side: that’s another 5 million, but most of them aren’t good at raging a battle on social media.
Which side will control the narrative in the end?
And so: I understand why Dd’s statement is what it is. I don’t fault him for making it. Still, I can’t in good conscience say to anyone, myself included, that the statement is a personal opinion and doesn’t matter. It matters a lot. His announcement is another stab to the Uyghurs, and the knife is sharp because of Dd’s social influence.
(Today, I saw Dd’s name for the first time in a Hong Kong pro-democracy online news site.)
The statement carried this sentence:
國家尊嚴不容侵犯,堅決維護祖國利益 The dignity of the country is not to be violated; the interest of our motherland is to be resolutely defended. Firstly: it’s character-for-character propaganda language. Secondly: even if we do not consider the labor camps, this is the condition in Xinjiang’s city of Urumqi. Where’s the dignity of the people who’re living there and who’s preventing that from being violated? The interest of the motherland—what kind of motherland answers an allegation of human rights violation with “interest” (利=profit, advantage; 益=benefit)? What kind of motherland has “protects its interest” being synonymous with surveillance and abuse of its own people?
I have a motherland, but it’s not the one in this narrative.
The issues of Xinjiang and the Uyghurs have also become even closer to Hong Kongers since 2019, when the fates of Hong Kongers and the Uyghurs became intricately tied—as dual examples of Chinese government’s human rights violations and indeed, these two populations who previously had very little in common have shown solidarity with each other against all odds. Their connection being this one simple, awful fact: both having what they value most stripped away by the same government—the traditions, religion and culture for the Uyghurs, the promised freedoms and hopes for democracy for Hong Kongers. As an online meme goes: “Today’s Xinjiang; Tomorrow’s Hong Kong” — expressing the fear that Hong Kongers may soon be subjected to the same surveillance as the Uyghurs today, for the same reason of having put up a fight against who they saw as their oppressors (this article offers an objective summary of what led to the 2009 clash between the Uyghurs and the Chinese government, which precipitated the former’s treatment as will-be terrorists today)(Note the role the US played in this.).
As such, I cannot look away from Xinjiang. As such, I cannot look at our two beautiful stars, Gg and Dd, without also seeing the flag with its blood red looming behind with its own five stars—the biggest of them symbolising the Chinese Communist Party.
How do I reconcile all the feelings? As I said, it’s a constant work-in-progress, possibly a lifelong one. Re: Gg and Dd, that’s what I tell myself at the moment: that my being an i-turtle shall not sway my view or silence me on any sociopolitical issues, that my being a fan of anything, anyone shall not mean any other human life is suddenly worth less to me, or its suffering, something I shall suddenly look away from. The moment this becomes true—that I find myself depreciating human lives, or ignoring the pain of others for the sake of my fannish pursuits—that’s when I must leave my fan identity until I find my discipline (I do understand the lure of a happy fandom bubble, and I’m far from immune to it). I’m a person before I’m a fan.
These are the rules of my world.
我的世界不退讓。
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Unwanted: Chapter 26, Unsurprising - Pt. 2
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader
Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.
Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, discussions of death, human trafficking, guilt and forgiveness.
Word Count: 666 (oops!) 😈
Previously On...: Bucky bought you a new mattress so you wouldn't have to deal with the aftermath of your old one <3
A/N: More conversation
NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates
Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!
Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!
Taglist: (Sadly, tag list is closed; Tumblr will not let me add anyone new. If you want to be notified when I update, please Follow me for Notifications!) @jmeelee @cazellen @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @blackhawkfanatic @buckybarnessimpp @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows @sashaisready @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @keylimebeag @maybefoxysouls @vicmc624 @j23r23 @wintercrows @crist1216 @cjand10 @pattiemac1@les-sel @dottirose @winterslove1917 @harperkenobi @ivet4 @casey1-2007 @mrsevans90 @steeph-aniie @bean-bean2000 @beanbagbitch @peachiestevie @wintrsoldrluvr @shadowzena43
Tumblr will not let me directly tag the following: @marcswife21 @erelierraceala @jupiter-107 @doublejeon @hiqhkey @unaxv @brookeleclerc
Later, after he’d helped you remake the bed with the new comforter and sheet set he’d bought for you (or rather, one of three different sets he’d bought, wanting you to have a choice), you’d sat him down in the livingroom and painstakingly went over the details you and Sam had managed to put together of your case so far.
“And that brings us to Chloe,” you said, sadly pinning up a copy of the girl’s autopsy photo you’d hacked from the coroner’s files onto your now crowded caseboard. “She’s their latest victim. Whomever they sold her to, he was vicious and he didn’t waste any time. It was only three days after they took her that her body showed up.”
Bucky nodded in understanding. “That’s the girl you mentioned last night,” he said. “The one you said you lost. Pocket, you gotta know that wasn’t your fault, right?”
You took in a shaky breath. “How can it be anything other than my fault, Bucky? I was right in the fucking room when they took her, but I was too strung out to notice what was happening right in front of my face!”
Bucky stood up and walked toward you. For a second, you thought he was going to hold you again, but at the last moment, he seemed to reconsider, instead opting to put a comforting hand on your shoulder. “You said you did that extra line so that other girl wouldn’t have to,” he said, his voice soft and calm, lacking any ounce of blame. “Seems to me like you found yourself stuck between a rock and a hard place, with no real way out. You couldn’t have known they were planning on taking a new girl that night.”
“But I should’ve suspected it, planned for it,” you said, not wanting to be let off the hook for your failure. “I let myself get sloppy, get stupid, and a girl fucking died because of it!”
This time, Bucky did hold you again, and you let him. “We all make mistakes, love,” he said softly. “Sometimes they're small, like leaving the milk out overnight, but sometimes they're huge, and there’s no undoing them. No matter how badly we want to.” A shift in his tone told you he wasn’t just speaking of your mistakes now, but his own, as well. “We can spend the rest of our lives beating ourselves up over them, hating ourselves, but it’s never gonna change what we did. The only thing we can do is learn from our mistakes, so we make sure we never make them again.” He pulled back and brushed a strand of hair out of your face. “And make amends to the people we’ve hurt along the way.”
You sniffled, hearing what he was saying, but not knowing how it could work for you. “But how do I make amends to a dead girl, Bucky?”
“By making sure she’s the last one they ever hurt,” he said resolutely, as if he had all the faith in the world in your ability to stop this trafficking scheme. “By not giving them an opportunity to hurt anyone else like they hurt her.”
You used the sleeve of Sam’s sweatshirt to wipe away some of the snot that was unattractively running down your nose. You’d have to make sure you washed it before you got it back to him.
“Okay,” you said, feeling a new sense of resolve blanket over you. You couldn’t absolve yourself from what you’d done, but you could make amends, and that gave you hope that one day, you might be able to forgive yourself. And then, if you could eventually learn to forgive yourself for this, did that mean that one day, you could forgive Bucky, too?
You shook the thought from your head, not wanting to let your emotions for him cloud your need to see this mission through to the end. “Well then,” you told him instead, “we better get to work.”
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#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x you#bucky x reader#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky x female reader#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes fanfiction#james bucky buchanan barnes#james buchanan barnes#mcu bucky barnes#james barnes
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[CN] MLQC Lucien's Through Thousands of Mirrors event translation (Day 1 -Thursday)
⚠️ SPOILER ALERT ⚠️
This post contains a HEAVY SPOILER for the event that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~
Through Thousands of Mirrors Event | Day 1 (You're here!) | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 | Day 6 | Day 7 | HS/Uni SSR Story: Monochrome Scenery
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[Tidbits: I don't wanna break the flow so I'll put some information here first 😂. Dr. Lawson is Lucien's post-grad professor. Before, he also appears in UR MQ Distant Similarity. During his post-grad he has three seniors Colt, Elliot, and Caroline.]
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[Math]
Seeing the particularly puzzled expression on the classmate next to him, Lucien starts to consider whether he should offer some assistance within his capabilities.
For instance, he thinks about telling the classmate that the topic currently being discussed on the blackboard is not from the same chapter as the one in the textbook he's currently reading.
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[MATH/BIOCHEMISTRY]
After the vending machine devours Lucien's one dollar and twenty-five cents for the third time, and with only three minutes left to get to his next class, he begins to seriously contemplate whether he should try some mysterious repair method—like giving it a good smack or a swift kick.
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[BIOCHEMISTRY]
Lucien coincidentally runs into Colt by the sports field, just as Colt is about to attend a cricket practice session.
Upon realizing that his senior from the lab is not only managing coursework and a significant project workload but also juggling a 20-hour weekly part-time job and daily school cricket team training, Lucien begins to contemplate whether there is any room for further optimization in his own schedule.
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[PREVIEW/COMPUTER SCIENCE]
During the brief half-hour period, Lucien typically uses the time to prepare for the upcoming class or visit the library to research and gather information.
In any case, that time should not be spent on arguing and explaining to people, like the enthusiastic campus volunteer in front of him.
"No, thank you. I'm not a high school student attending a summer camp. This is my student ID, and I'm indeed a student here, a graduate student. Yes, I'm not lost, and I need to get to my class. Can you please let me go?"
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[COMPUTER SCIENCE]
Lucien presses the enter key, intending to ask the teacher if he can leave early once his coursework is done. However, the error message on the screen deters him from that thought. So, he sits back down and begins to examine it again.
But that's okay, he does understand the commonality between computer science and experimental research: it's often hard to know right away if the thing at hand will work, why it's not working, or even why it's even working.
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[LAB]
Come on, come on, come on. After moving this box, there's another.
And after moving that box, there are three more to go.
The prospects for the future and the shine in one's eyes are often taken away by the God of research in such necessary yet mechanical repetitive work.
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[LAB]
Lucien goes out to get some water and returns to find a school burger on his desk.
Colt, with dark circles under his eyes, waves at Lucien and saying, "No need to thank me, newcomer. Have some food, we might be staying here today."
Lucien quietly eats the burger, hesitant to tell Colt that he has spent more time in the laboratory than in the dorm.
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[LAB]
When Dr. Lawson enters the laboratory, what he sees is a scene where his graduate and doctoral students are sleeping and sprawled all over the place.
On the laboratory whiteboard, several words were written in large letters: "Publish immediately! Guaranteed to be published in Nature!!"
Dr. Lawson retrieves small blankets from the cabinet, covering each of these research madmen.
He proceeds to organize the data and take over the finishing work on the project. Of course, when it comes to authorship in the paper, not a single one of these kids' names can be left out.
#OK BUT this whole event and story kinda explain why he has a some attachment to Dr. Lawson 🥺#mlqc lucien#mr love queen's choice#mlqc cn#mlqc spoiler#mlqc#mlqc translation#mr. love queen's choice#mr love lucien#mlqc xu mo#mlqc spoilers
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Suicidal Misunderstanding IX
Star Wars Time Travel AU #27
Part I - - - - - Part II - - - - - Part III - - - - - Part IV - - - Part V - - - - - Part VI - - - - - Part VII - - - - - Part VIII
Content Warning: This chapter contains potentially triggering material, particularly aftermath of attempted suicide as well as discussions of bodily injury.
Cody woke up the morning after the...drunken keldabe still feeling uneasy. He spent half an hour attempting to read over reports in preparation for the Umbaran campaign before giving it up as a lost cause. He distracted himself for a little while by pouring over last night’s cantina surveillance, before giving up on that as well and sending a message to General Skywalker.
‘Any updates on General Kenobi’s status?’
He watched the comms as communications from everyone besides the General trickled in. He answered a few requests for requisitions, forwarded some medical reports, and ignored an irritating handful of overly-personal questions.
Agonizing over it the whole time, he opened a comm-text link to Obi-Wan. It took nearly an hour, but he managed to send two sentences. ‘Hope you’re recovering well. Look forward to upcoming mission discussion.’
He immediately wanted to retroactively delete the message, mortified by every word and deeply concerned at every second that passed without a reply.
He spent the next 30 minutes hunched over, quickly closing every incoming CT and CC communication, justifying the time to himself as ‘technically on leave.’
He lurched forward when he finally received a General’s comm code, but slumped in disappointment when it was Skywalker, not Kenobi.
‘Not as drunk but still seems a little high. He says he wasn’t drugged. He’s taking the rest of the day off. I’m monitoring.’
Taking the rest of the day off. Did that mean he wasn’t carrying around his comm? Kriff. Should he more or less concerned that the general was actually taking a day off?
He decided to be more concerned.
‘Thank you for the update. Respectfully request information on any changes.’
Hopefully that would encourage Skywalker to keep him informed even if he stopped freaking out over his vod’s behavior.
Stowing the remote comm, he stood up and exited the temporary planet-side office, throwing himself into cleaning up the mess that was nearly 20,000 clone troopers simultaneously attempting to get the most out of a very brief R&R.
Shortly before mid-day, he received another update from Skywalker.
‘Just managed to get him to medical. Healer cleared him of drug interactions but Obi-Wan’s still acting strange (not crying, but a lot of hugging).’
Cody stared at that for a long while.
‘Any other verbal indications of upcoming danger?’ he finally asked. Skywalker didn’t reply.
Shortly after nightfall, his incident reports were interrupted by a call from an unknown temple number. He quickly opened it, and a holo of an unfamiliar Mon Calamari female healer appeared in miniature on the desk.
“Commander Cody. Thank you for answering so quickly. Are you somewhere private?” she asked, voice deliberately neutral.
The Commander tensed up. “Yes, sir. I’m in CC office space, alone. The room and the channel are both secure. Is this regarding General Kenobi?”
“Yes.” She replied. “My name is Master Bant Eerin; I’m a temple healer as well as a personal friend of Obi-Wan’s. He’s...he’s in the healing halls right now. We’re still trying to understand exactly what happened- I’ll tell you what I can but first we need to rule out any possible drugs he may have contact with. I need you to describe in detail anything he may have been exposed to that could have possibly had mind-altering effects.”
The Commander was a professional. He swallowed back his fear, his questions, and his demands to know what was going on.
“Of course. Everything on the Negotiator was GAR Standard, and I was with him when we left the ship. We went directly to the lower levels. The first time he was exposed to anyone outside the 212th was when we left our transport on level 3915. I...actually have footage of him the whole time night after that point. I’m sending it over right now, sir.”
“That would be extremely helpful, thank you.” He watched as she pulled it up on a second comm, sound barely audible.
He continued with his report: “One of the boys took it without permission. He didn’t mean anything by it, he’s just an idiot; I’ve already issued a severe reprimand. In any case, he brought it to me after I issued surveillance on the cantina, it tracks everything the General did- as far as I can tell, he had a glass of house grub wine, two shots of rancor blood, and an unnamed mixed cocktail ‘on the house.’ You can see everything the bartender added- as far as I can tell nothing was slipped in. He just... blacked out suddenly after the fourth drink, and quickly startled awake, confused by his surroundings.”
“I see.” Her tone was still carefully neutral and Cody didn’t know how to read her expression. He waited, wishing he was wearing his bucket so he didn’t have to keep schooling his face into professional patience.
“You brought him back to the temple...correct?”
“Yes, sir.”
She let out a deep breath, gills fluttering slightly. “We’ll probably have more questions later, but please understand our inquires are entirely based around determining how we can best help Obi-Wan. This call and any future ones are not intended, and should absolutely not be interpreted, as indications of blame. He’s actually spoken to me about you before, I know he has the deepest respect for you, personally and professionally. Someone will likely be assigned to talk to everyone whose spent time with him recently, including myself.”
The sick feeling in his gut from last night returned full force. “I...believe I understand sir. His condition is serious, then?”
Her gills fluttered again.
“Even now, I think we can safely anticipate a full physical recovery. He...there’s no easy way to say this...it appears he attempted to end his own life. Knight Skywalker got to him just in time, and he received bacta within minutes of the initial burn. I...like I said...we’ll began work to figure out why-”
Her voice broke and she stared up, large tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. She hastily wiped them away.
“Rest assured commander, he’s getting the best treatment possible. Thank you for your assistance. I’ll do my best to answer any questions you might have right now. This is my personal comm link- please feel free to reach out to me at any point for updates.”
“I-” Cody cleared his throat. “Can I come to the temple? To...” he trailed off, not sure how to finish.
“Not tonight, I’m sorry. The healers need to focus; he’s not allowed any visitors until he’s out of Bacta, I’m afraid.”
“Skywalker must be throwing a fit at that” Cody remarked numbly.
The healer winced. “Knight Skywalker is currently sedated. He was...injured in the struggle to keep Obi-Wan from further harm. Master Windu witnessed part of it, but we’ll have to wait until its safe to wake him to get the full story. I’ll be notifying Captain Rex of the situation after we finish speaking.”
“I’ll do it.” Cody offered immediately. “Tell me what happened.”
Eerin hesitated.
“Please, Sir. It will be better coming from me and...if he’s the only other trooper who’s being informed at the moment...”
“Of course,” she said quietly. “We don’t know the full circumstances, but at some point in performing emergency care for Master Kenobi, Knight Skywalker was stabbed in the lower abdomen with a vibroblade. It pierced his large intestine. The blade was pulled out shortly before healers arrived, causing some further damage and blood loss. He’s already finished surgery, and should only need a few hours of Bacta at most. Considering his extraordinary past recovery rates, he’ll likely be out of bed tomorrow and fully healed by the end of the week.”
“General Kenobi wouldn’t...” Cody trailed off again. He was having a hard time putting coherent sentences together.
Bant looked at the ceiling for a moment, seeming to collect her thoughts.
“Psychosis can have many manifestations. Even with- with conventional injuries, people can mistake help for harm. There’s just too much we don’t understand, and only so much we can learn before they wake up. Are you certain you wish to be the one to inform Captain Rex?”
“Yes.” That was about the only thing the Commander was certain of right now. “Is there anyone else in the GAR I should inform of...anything?”
“The military aspect of this isn’t my area of expertise. If there’s someone you trust who can be a support for you, I don’t see why you shouldn’t be able to tell them in confidence. Some form of what happened is going to get out eventually.” she replied. “Please use your discretion, I suppose. It’s...not really my speciality but I imagine you’ll receive further orders on how much to release to the GAR once Obi-Wan’s stable.”
Right. Discretion. Because Obi-Wan wasn’t just Obi-Wan- he was a high general in charge of nearly 1/3 of the republic’s forces. If word of this got out to the wrong ears it would cause mass panic, maybe even an emboldened separatist advance. It was an insane amount of responsibility for one person, no wonder - he deliberately didn’t finish the thought.
“I’ll comm the Captain immediately. Thank you for the information, General.” he said out loud.
“Feel free to contact me for further updates, and tell Captain Rex he’s welcome to do the same. I’ll message you when its clear to visit the halls.”
“Yes, Sir.” Cody responded, saluting automatically.
“Take care of yourself, Commander Cody”
The hologram blinked out. Cody sat motionless for several long moment before sweeping his desk off, sending the assorted flimsies and redundant comm-units of various designations to the ground.
He stared at the empty desk, then tapped a button on his wrist comm, opening a private audio channel. “CT-7567, please come in” he said calmly.
“Cody?” came the alarmed reply. “I’m here, what’s going on?” Why did he sound so panicked? He had deliberately used his calmest voice. Oh well.
“Please report immediately to CC Office 12 in Guard Headquarters”
“I’ll be there in 10″
Cody hung up. He stared at the blank wall. He knew something was wrong with how the General said goodbye.
He opened the single desk drawer and dumped the odd wires and coins inside to the floor. Eerin had said burn. That could mean a lot of things, but lightsaber was the most likely.
Cody puked profusely into the empty drawer. He stared at the vomit for a moment before carefully closing the drawer. He still felt a little sick. He hadn’t even said anything back to the General, he just stood there, frozen.
He stared vaguely at the wall across, wondering if he was going to puke again.
Rex burst into the room. “Cody! What’s going on?! You- kark, what is that smell?”
“I puked in the desk drawer” Cody explained.
Rex shut the door behind him and slowly walked over. He knelt down next to the desk, gently taking Cody’s hands in this own. “Cody. Vod. Talk to to me.”
“Obi-Wan tried to kill himself.”
Rex’s hands tightened over Cody’s compulsively and Cody squeezed back harder. He closed his eyes so he wouldn’t have to look at Rex’s expression.
“Some of ghost company went out for drinks last night. Obi-Wan started acted oddly. We flew towards the temple. He started crying. We got to the temple. He Keldabe kissed me. He told me goodbye. I didn’t say anything back.”
“Oh, vod” Rex whispered. He gently pulled the slack Cody off the chair and onto his lap on the floor. Cody continued mechanically. “I did reports today. Skywalker said he was with him. I left Obi-Wan a message. I don’t think he saw it. He tried to kill himself. Skywalker must have left him alone. He saved him. Obi-Wan stabbed Skywalker.”
Rex froze, still holding on to Cody.
“The healer called. Asked about drugs. They don’t think its drugs but they had to ask. She said they’re both going to heal completely fine. I have a link if you want to call the healer directly. That’s...it. I have reports to do now.”
Rex held Cody tighter. “Not right now”
“It’s war. People get hurt. People die. I have work to do”
“Not right now,” Rex repeated. “You have the right to be upset. You have the right to grieve. You’re a person, of course you have feelings.”
“Obi-Wan said that.” Cody whispered. Then he started crying. He continued to quietly sob for some time, hurt and bewildered and scared. They sat on the floor together; Rex barely moved, simply held on to his older brother as he fell apart.
Inevitably, Cody’s tears dried up and he pulled away.
“I don’t know how to clean this,” he said gesturing at that closed drawer.
“I’ll take care of it. Let’s just get you to bed. There’s CC bunks here, right?
“Yes but...”
Cody didn’t really like sleeping so isolated, but he also couldn’t imagine facing the 212th right now.
“I’ll stay here with you. We’ll go to the temple together in the morning.”
Rex shepherded Cody to the fresher. He stared at the mirror with a vague sense of recognition before automatically moving through a standard sanitation routine. By the time he finished, Rex had joined him in his room.
“What did you do with the vomit?” Cody asked, suddenly exhausted. They slipped into bed together.
“Swapped the whole desk with Pond’s. That bastard knows what he did.”
Cody let out a snort. Then, much to his surprise, he sank heavily into a deep, dreamless sleep.
Part X
#star wars#my au#suicidal misunderstanding au#star wars au no 27#potentially triggering#attempted suicide#injury#all off screen this chapter#character is not actually suicidal but is severely divorced from reality due to space wizard plot device#starwars#codywan#angst#fanfic
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