#playing with gender presentation and gender expression in ways that don't necessarily impact your gender identity.

[corviiids]

i see you tagging Joker Persona5 (his christian name) on that crossdressing post but . . . Have you written him crossdressing-

Lala scrutinises him for a long moment before plucking a fresh q-tip from the packet and smudging his Cupid's bow. Ren feels pampered--observed--the way he might if he were a doll, but it's not an altogether bad feeling. It's kind of nice. Definitely not the worst way he's been observed this year. Far from it, really.

"I think you're decent," Lala decides.

He'd expected, maybe, some level of surprise from her when he'd asked her about this. Some lighthearted teasing, perhaps? Shouldn't have. She's a consummate professional. It's almost a shame, because maybe if she'd interrogated him about it he'd be forced to verbalise what exactly this feeling is. Now he's just going to have to figure himself out without the comparative comfort of doing someone a favour.

Lala turns him to the mirror.

No grand revelations there. It's Ren in the glass, it's just Ren in a dress. He doesn't feel any different. Doesn't feel any nicer, doesn't feel more right, any more himself. Just Ren in a dress.

Prettier, though.

He adjusts his belt, self-conscious.

"You like the colour?" Lala asks him. She's still holding the lipstick; it's a sweet, cool red. She's businesslike. "We could go darker if you want, but you're young. Bright is good."

"I like it," Ren says.

"Dress isn't too tight?"

"No."

"How you feeling?"

Mostly the same. A little more painted. It's been a year of finding comfort in some kind of veneer like it's a trade. Hiding his eyes to swap vulnerability for a roguish streak, for instance, or for a bit of plausible deniability. His glasses are off now. He'd asked, but the false lashes were too long and they'd smudge the lenses, or so said Lala. And of course the domino mask is nowhere to be found. Ren's face is exposed. But it's painted.

He tilts his head and watches his mirror self do the same, inquisitive like a bird of paradise. The gloss makes his lips look pursed all the time. Lala's shadowed his eyes, too, made them glittery and hooded. It's a wide-eyed look that makes him look curious and mysterious all at once. Doesn't look like him, but it does. Feels like meeting a twin and then taking her place.

Lala is watching him. She's too professional to let that knowing expression pierce her own immaculate makeup.

"You're coping well with those heels," she offers, and does not ask further.

"Thanks," says Ren. "I think I can take my shift now."

"Watch that lippie if you eat or drink," she warns him. "It'll smear. Anything else you want, hon?"

His mirror self tilts her head again, coy. No mask. Joker winks out from a sparkle in her eye.

"Do you have gloves?" Ren asks.

[mockingradfems]

I feel like you aren't listening to what I'm saying. Or rather you are only listening to half of what I'm saying.

Leaning masculine or feminine doesn't determine gender. It might be how someone chooses to present but there can be masculine women or feminine men. And that's also true for trans people.

Women feel a pressure to look flawless in terms of skin care. So wear makeup to look blemish free. But to be be fair men are feeling this pressure too. In some parts of the world that is more of a gender neutral pressure and it likely will be more of a gender neutral pressure in the future.

But women don't feel pressure to wear the "heavy" make up styles the new colors of lipstick like green blue or black. Or exaggerated eye make up. Many are told it looks ridiculous or clown like or ugly or childish. But they do it anyway because its a form of self expression. That was the point of Goth and Lolita. They were fashion trends involving dresses and makeup up that weren't succumbing to societal pressures and were counter culture. But they still were wearing dresses and make up. Wearing it is not playing into a stereotype or being oppressed.

Women can choose to wear or not wear make up. Some really like it it makes them feel good and they enjoy wearing for themselves. While others only do because they don't want to be seen make up free but don't like wearing it. The point isn't that makeup is forced on all women and no one should wear it. The point is wearing makeup should be as acceptable and normalized as not wearing it. Its about the freedom to choose and making sure everyone has it.

Gender being societally constructed doesn't make it not real. This I've said in every reply. If socially constructed things aren't real neither is something like basic human rights. Because that comes from philosophy which is a social construction. Because its a part of society it will shift with the culture . Gender isn't thought of as the same way as it was a century ago but that doesn't mean the concept is meaningless or not real. Gender is social and psychological and cultural. So stuff attributed to a certain gender may change over time people may approach it in different ways than they have in the past. That doesn't make it meaningless. Even if today you got every person in the world to agree with that gender isn't real that concept still has impact on them what they do and how they behave.

It would be like saying race and ethnicity are socially constructed they don't exist. But even if everyone agrees they will still deal with things associated with a specific race or ethnicity. The current culture and biases associated with it is isn't erased by saying gender isn't real any more than saying saying ethnicities are socially constructed would erase ethnic groups as concepts. But you can challenge and gender norms. Make certain things acceptable for a gender that wasn't before and doing that gives everyone more freedom to be themselves.

And when was dysphoria mentioned? That book is study material for medical school and the quote said is gender is not necessarily tied to biological sex. It mentioned dysphoria not at all. You can't change sex but gender is not sex. Being female doesn't always being a woman.

Saying being female makes you inherently a woman despite all evidence to the contrary and ignoring science to push your beliefs is what makes you a terf.

And I disagree with you.

Saying dresses and makeup are inherently oppressive and wearing them is wearing a stereotype is not the same as admitting some women feel societal pressure to look a certain way. Make up is not inherently oppressive. I don't believe that I'm not a rad fem.

I believe that wearing it should feel like a choice. And people who wear it should feel like they had that choice but not everyone has that choice. Changing things for them doesn't always mean changing things for someone who freely and happily wears make up.

You have been cherry picking parts of my replies that make you feel validated removing all context that would not . And now you are trying to use that cherry picked information to try to convince me that I'm a terf. You aren't actually listening to a word im saying just trying to twist my words into something you believe and I don't and then trying to convince me I agree with you. Its just blatant gaslighting at this point. So I'm going to stop replying to you and just block you.

Does wearing a dress make someone a woman?

Does wearing a skirt make someone a woman?

Does wearing heels make someone a woman?

Does wearing patterns and bright colours make someone a woman?

Does wearing makeup or painting someone’s face make them a woman?

Is ‘woman’ an aesthetic that can be applied to anyone? Is this aesthetic culturally universal and clearly defined?