#playing p4 for the first time was actually insane bc I was trying so hard to convince myself he wasn’t the killer

[gio-cosmo]

adachi, yay or nay

[Persona 4 spoilers below]

Yay! 🎉

The second he first appeared I pointed at my screen and said “This is the one! This is my favorite character! I’m sure he’ll do nothing wrong in the history of ever!” so you can imagine my increasing devastation as the game progressed 💀 I always have a tendency to fixate on characters that end up being ridiculously antagonistic…and yet I’m shocked each time.

However! If there’s one thing I love to do in my free time it’s over analyze villainous characters and dissect them into bits, because antagonistic characters tend to be the most well written/have the most interesting backgrounds imo (not in all cases obviously, but you get my point). I think Adachi is a very complex character, much more complex then people give him credit for. He’s my favorite antag of the series, and I think the way he was written as a villain and the way he parallels not only Yu, but so many members of the Investigation Team is so fantastic. So while I obviously don’t support his actions or anything because…yikes!…I do appreciate the complexity of his character as a whole.

Also, on a less serious note, I enjoy his silly antics before he’s like. Outed as a murderer lmfao. I think it’s funny that he just walks up to this group of teens and starts spewing information about a sensitive police case and then is like “oh whoops lol maybe I shouldn’t have said that 😓” and nobody questions it at all. They all collectively shrug their shoulders and are like “typical Adachi moment!”

I’ve also stated this before, but the dynamic between Adachi and Dojima is something I really enjoy and I think is often very overlooked! I am once again bringing up the end of the Adachi section of P4AU…and I am once again bawling my eyes out.

So anyways. Adachi is a favorite of mine for sure!

[1000-rat-corpses]

here's a little behind the scenes on my toreba addiction in the form of a little baring the ugly, and a little bit of '2020 the year of the pandemic in review' loool

i post my wins on toreba in those big ol walls of shit, right

WELLLL, it aint all sunshine and rainbows...

first the depressing part.

you should SEE the level of fails i go through to get to the point where i can post those compilations. just now i spent what would have been like... 42 dollars of points (23 plays) and didn't win the fucking thing, bailed bc i wasnt sure what to do and had like idk 2 plays left of points, then someone fixed the prize's position in one shot, passed it to another person, and that person won it in 2 plays. i was right behind the winner bc i had requeued hoping my two plays could do it.

the kicker is that if i hadn't fucked it up in the beginning part by bringing it just like idk a half inch too far right, it could have been won in 5-6 plays.

5-6 versus 23, and no win. lol that shit does get to you, bc tho it's not real money im spending it's a lot of time and effort goes into earning free points so the sting is sharp and biting, and it sits on you for the rest of the day, and sometimes days after bc you no longer have that stash of points you were working for and stockpiling for so long.

i earned a lot of points for my brother's account by doing some shitty mobile game offer. i won about 3 things with something like 240 dollars of points bc i was impatient, and he wanted this goku figure. i really wanted to win it for him bc like, thats a nice thing to do right? im winning all these other things for myself so surely i can get him the one thing he really wants (ftr i have won him like at least 6 things he likes/wanted so there is that) butttttt i stupidly got all sunk cost fallacy on that machine. i won the goku with my VERY last available play. in total costing me something like 100+ dollars of points. i whaled on a miku figure i already won 3 of bc i got baited on a machine that looked 'good', and spent 90 in points on her. i whaled on a similar machine for a shitty ugly looking edward elric figure: 74 dollars worth. 72 on some stupid pocaccho plush. and these are just a few.

my worst offense was a 3am depression whale. 125k tp (125 dollars worth) gone down the drain for this lil dude. and i did not win him. ever.

because i love persona 3. and i had won THREE of the persona 4 version of this, but minato who i like way more eluded me....and the night before i passed off a one shot win to another person thinking it wasn't good. LOL. the machine i played on was total ass, and my skill wasn't up to par i guess bc it got close so many times only to be reset. i kept whaling until i reset it for the millionth time and decided to let go bc there was no progress. my friends in discord were like bro you gotta let go but even tho you've got people telling you to stop sometimes it's really really hard. the hatred i had for myself for that stupid ass whale session for probably like a week was *chef's kiss* IMMACULATE. for the record, i could have just bought him for like, 23 dollars including shipping from a website doing preorders. OR i could have just sold one of my p4 spares to make money to buy him. but no it was like, you gotta win it. i would have been 100% satisfied if i had just won him after 125k tp spent. at least i told myself that. honestly i think i would have.

now here's the sappy part.

probably what is surprising to most people is that the social aspect of this game is phenomenally rewarding. i've made sooo many new friends during quarantine. we've had so much fun across all types of media even outside of getting in voice to help each other win prizes or just give someone company while they whale a bunch of free points (these are fun nights!!). we also host movie streams together, play games together, fuck around with the mudae bot with waifu gacha and waifu wars, bitch about low ball offers on mercari lol, and try to console and help each other out in our channel called 'gamblers hotline' lol. we've seen the rise and fall of the main, singular toreba discord at the time and witnessed it get nuked for no reason bc the owner hd a meltdown lol, then watched our tiny group refrom TWICE until we got it right, then watched on the side eatin popcorn while two new 'main' discords began to fight for dominance.

we change our nicknames in discord on the fly bc it's fucking funny, and to hold ourselves accountable. I was [Punished Lycoris] after that 125k p3 whale and fail, and for a while stuff like [Lyco - FREE PLAY ONLY DAY 3] to show we're keeping our responsible streak up XD

this all sounds pretty insane i guess bc 'gambling addict found family' doesn't really sound too...normal LOL. but i can't imagine what my 2020 would have been without them. it's kinda sappy i guess. it's nice to make friends you can talk to until 3am night after night with actual voices when the pandemic had you feeling some type of way.

the days of tons of points we had back in the fall-winter of 2020 is pretty much over though - the nature of our free point offers has kinda changed so we dont hold those fun night time streams of others playing, but we're hanging in there i guess.

sooo yeeah. i could write so much more, but ill stop there lol

this is what us fucked up addicts go through lmfao