#piperaileenlenox

[dxsole]

❝ Please don’t freak out…but I’m pregnant. I SAID DON’T FREAK OUT. ❞ // givin' you some options

ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʙᴀʙʏ sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇ! | Not Accepting

His initial response is to squeak out, “…Now when you say pregnant…” Okay, he can’t think of any other meaning for pregnant that would make any kind which would mean she is with the usual, old translation of “with child”. Like there’s a little batch of cells with his DNA in it just chilling in her lady bits. That eventually will…be a little person. A baby. An actual, physical child.

That they’ll have to care for. And throw a baby shower for. And save up for college for. And get glasses for. And order them a nice Mr. Chemistry set so they can perhaps pretend to be working in a forensic crime lab and help out their dad. Or maybe…maybe they’ll be the creative sort, making masterpieces and signing Baby Hoggarth in the corners of canvases.

It’s as terrifying as it wonderful and he’s torn between leaping for joy and passing out. He stays standing and silent for a few seconds more before opting to say something. “Uh, I’m sorry. I can’t move or think right now…Uh, I think I just had a flash forward of this kid’s life and, uh, it’s a lot to process–” Even when he’s clueless, he still manages to never shut up. “B–But this is…wow. This is wow.” There’s a sudden sputter of laughter, arms outstretching to take hold of her hands. “I’m…I’m freaked out but like in possible new dad way…are– are you good? With…with lil’ baby Hoggarth…? Lenox? Lenox-Hoggarth?”

[diicktective]

@piper-aileen-lenox // From Here .

            Though seated, Swift’s body language is an unintentional mirror of Claire’s. He’s silent, arms crossed with one eyebrow hiked up above an indifferent expression. He has no concerns about this chick vetoing her boyfriend’s dumbass plan-- if SHE had any better ideas, Swift wouldn’t even BE here. Still, there’s a part of him that can’t believe this is really happening cause frankly-- it is so fuckin’ weird.             But what do I know ? I’m just a naive only child. Could be totally NORMAL to pay strangers to covertly seduce your siblings for personal gain. SURE . Fuckin’ weirdos. But he’ll be making $100 a date off these fuckin’ weirdos, so Swift plays along with the bizarre request. Yeah, people ask me to do this sorta shit everyday. Absolutely. How about I get fifty in advance ?            “Hell YEAH , sister,” He says once she finishes addressing him. “ INTEL is the key to any successful mission, and the way your boy-toy here spins it, I’m at risk of gettin’ my face bitten off for sayin’ the wrong thing.” It’s goddamn hilarious the way they talk about this Piper girl. No way she can really be THAT bad, though from the look of things her gene pool IS fed by a slightly gonzo stream. Maybe she just doesn’t wanna be bothered by horny creeps trying to get in her pants, which makes this whole venture kinda slimy ASIDE from being fuckin’ weird, but whatever ; showing a girl a good time ain’t exactly the height of degenerate behavior.            “ NOW . ” The whole shady dealing has Swift feeling kinda dramatic, so he fires up a Djarum & blows a plume of smoke at his unlikely benefactors. “Gimme the rundown.” 

[bitemyhip-blog]

@piper-aileen-lenox -- LIKED FOR A STARTER FROM THE BIRTHDAY BOY.

    “I can tell,” he says, drawing a few circles around and around on his leg. A spiral. Hypnotized eyes, “I can tell you’re a part of the Subgenius. Just like me. But then you can’t be JUST like me! B.O.B. We’re not joiners. Not you and me. Can I see your tits? ...Sorry. Are you here to SEE someone?”

[delanceyxbrothers]

@piper-aileen-lenox Tagged me!

tagging: @lipstick-and-shotguns @frxncaise @a-smile-dat-spreads-like-buttah @truthoftwohearts

Rules: Put your music library on shuffle. List the first 10 songs that come up, then tag 10 people.

Corner of the Sky - Pippin

Monica’s Song - Clinton the Musical (fite me this song is catchy)

Far From the Home I Love - Fiddler on the Roof

Mage Pride - Dragon Age II Soundtrack (Vid has loose translation)

Falling - The Civil Wars

Dance With the Devil - Breaking Benjamin

This is War - `30 Seconds to Mars

‘Tain’t A Fit Night Out for Man or Beast - Bullets Over Broadway

Masquerade/Why So Silent? - Phantom of the Opera

Clubs and Diamonds - Murder Ballad

[splatteredfingers]

@piper-aileen-lenox

[text: wrong number] So, apparently it has been destined that I can’t meet the single normal person in this godforsaken town. Because you know what this one did for a job? He’s a fucking puppeteer. He sticks his hand up the asses of dolls and talks for them. Why can’t I just find some nice guy who’s a realtor or something? Do I just attract the freaks or is it fate or is there a memo that I didn’t get???

[text: wrong number] …you are not mimi, are you?

[ text: unknown number ] no, I’m not. But if you want a realtor, maybe go to some open houses rather than hitting up OK Cupid or match. There’s a lot of sex starved weirdos on those. [ text: unknown number ] just some friendly advice from your local wrong number.

[thetcughest]

@piper-aileen-lenox

The older girl arched an eyebrow as she looked down at Pepper. Although, the angle that she had to adjust her gaze was not much. Pepper was close to her height and seemed to have some slight underlying frustrations with her. Nothing she couldn’t handle, but still something to keep an eye on. No use in getting swung at out of the blue.

“Oh wow. Real edgy. A teenager who doesn’t like adults.” Piper teased, trying to keep her tone as light as she could, not the deadpan delivery she might have given Oscar. She might as well try to make this kid like her. “I don’t blame you, though. I wouldn’t listen to me either if I was your age. What’ve I got to offer? Just terrible life advice that sounds like it came straight from a 1980′s film on the horrors of drugs and sex. I’d tell me to fuck off too.”

Pepper crossed her arms, eyes narrowed at Piper as if the older girl was a suspicious and definitely unwanted stain on the wall. Which, considering how much time Piper had been spending with Oscar recently, she might as well have been; at least with a stain, there was stain remover. 

“Not adults,” Pepper clipped back with a saccharine smile (though that was a lie—Pepper generally hated adults too). “Just you.” With a huff, she strode to the small apartment’s tiny kitchen, busying herself with putting away dishes. “Look, I really don’t give a shit. Oscar’s working late, so he ain’t gonna be back for another couple of hours. So...go fuck off. Or whatever.”

[innorninepatris]

@piper-aileen-lenox [X]

Piper studied her friend for a moment as she explained the situation, preparing herself for the worst of the worst news. Death. Terminal illnesses. Abuse. Sexual assault. She’d steeled herself, vowing to be there for Caoil first and to deal with her own emotions second.

But as the truth came out, the redhead just blinked, feeling her mouth slowly opening, a bit like a fish. It hadn’t been the reasoning that she’d expected. Hell, she couldn’t even figure out why Caoilainn seemed so solemn. She was in love, for god’s sake. Maybe it was scary, but she should have been on cloud nine, not acting like her aunt had just died.

“I mean, you had me scared. I thought you were dying or something. But…it’s just a girl?” Piper let out a breathy laugh, letting one hand brush her hair out of her face. “I…I know it’s scary, but it’s worth it, it’s so worth it. I bet she’s gorgeous. You wouldn’t deserve anyone le–” She stopped, suddenly acutely aware of exactly why her friend had seemed so anxious. And why she’d started her statement the way she had.

Oh.

“I…I don’t see how any love could be wrong, Caoil. I mean, anybody worth a rat’s ass would be much happier to know that there’s more love in the world. And I’m including God in that. If he’s gonna judge you for this and condemn you for your happiness, fuck him.”

As someone who had gone through half of those tragedies and then some, Caoilainn had grown used to the feeling of her throats closing up in her sleep, or nightmares leaving her sick and shaking for hours. Yet, here she stood, face flushed as she realized she had blurred out the truth to Piper.

"I know, I know, I've read every article on God not caring who I am with and Jesus declaring the centurion and his lover fit for heaven, but I keep remembering what I've been told time and time again." She replied, punching the bridge of her nose. She was annoyed at herself for getting so worked up, but god knew that she could use someone to listen and help her. "I have always been taught that no one but the church leaders can interpret the Bible, and that the bishops and priests know best… so what do I do now? How do I convince myself to love Janie as much as I can and not let her go?"

She hadn't realized she was crying until she wiped away a few tears, trying to catch her breath before she started sobbing into the woman's arms. "How do I know that this is love and not some kind of test?"

[notyourgbf]

@piper-aileen-lenox

    “Okay, so---good news.” He’ll lead with that since most people enjoy the upside first, and the type he’s about the deliver is the best outside of You get to go home for the day and It’s lunch break. “You get a break at three. Fifteen minutes of sweet freedom. Bad news, I need you to straighten up what you can of the clearance rack first. It looks like a tornado hit it, and I need to go test a really questionable Playstation 2 before this dude goes nuclear.” 

[dxsole]

❝ This kid can come out anytime it’s ready. ❞

ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʙᴀʙʏ sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴍᴇᴍᴇ! | Not Accepting

“You do look like you’re about to burst…in a good way.” He assures, gently patting at her round belly. It’s amazing that she doesn’t just roll away sometimes what with her size and…new roundness. “You’re almost there, babe. Don’t worry, the baby knows when it’s gotta get goin’– we just gotta make sure we’re prepared, right? Gotta baby proof shit. Get a baby cam. Little crime scene forensics set for the baby–”

[delanceyxbrothers]

@piper-aileen-lenox

[ text: Oskiekins ] Mo, I really don’t know what to do. I’m like a week late and me being pregnant is kind of a possibility. And I don’t want to say anything to Oscar and panic him, but also I don’t want to have to go to the store and buy a pregnancy test all by myself. I kind of want emotional support from him on this one. But getting that would mean stressing him out and I don’t know what to do.

[text; Pip-Boy]: Piper, where are you???? Is this a joke or are you being serious, bc I'm heading over to your place right now. Don't panic

[dxsole]

 Watercolour Character Maker | Ayumu!

Tagged By:  @piper-aileen-lenox // im cryin this is adorable Tagging: pls take iiitt frommm mee ittss sooso cuuettetetedfgjdkbgkd

[diicktective]

🚨 // oof

Aggression / Sexual Tension // @piper-aileen-lenox

          “ SHIT . ” For a half - second he’s enraptured, looking up at her as the cold concrete warms beneath his back. “I’d say we got about 18 minutes before that guard gets through his rotation.” Hands grip Piper’s hips, squeezing & kneading, then slip up under her shirt. “Whattaya think we can FIT IN ? ”

[delanceyxbrothers]

@piper-aileen-lenox ((x))

“Oh god. This isn’t what any of us wear. No person I know would actually wear a flower crown. We’d get mugged.

But sure. This is bohemian. Close enough.”

"This is New York City, Piper. We've all got a good chance of getting mugged no matter what we're wearing— and isn't it kind of gross to say someone got mugged because of what they're wearing?"

[bitemyhip-blog]

@piper-aileen-lenox -- LIKED.

    “I don’t think that’s... I don’t think that’s verifiable science. You probably shouldn’t do that.”