#pip's edible essays

[totallyboatless]

my new game is "take an edible before dinner and then start writing a tumblr post and see when it hits" so let's go

It's been decided that in this metaphor, your sun sign is "who you are when you're just chilling with people you like"

Here's what I think about moon signs when applied to "in the sheets" literally. Tell me in the tags or message me (anon is activated) if I'm right or very off base lol. And if I'm very wrong I wanna know your rising and sun signs

Disclaimer, this is for fun and jokes and if you're not into sex that's okay! This one might not be for you

(Here's a link if you don't know your moon sign)

Capricorn: Either a dom top or a bratty bottom. Either way, likes to make people work for it. Probably would be legit a really good dominatrix actually lol

Aquarius: So switchy that they're not truly happy except with other switches; talks a lot during sex, mainly making jokes. Sorry, babe, "deflecting with humor" stays ON during sex.

Pisces: Oh, darling. You're such a bottom that the idea of someone calling you darling makes you swoon a little. You prefer emotional connection and a nice date beforehand. Your actual dream date might be "walking barefoot on a beach holding hands"

Aries: For sure is into kink. Like, light bondage is the lowest bar for a moon Aries. Likes rough sex and dirty talk, but also likes long, slow make-out sessions.

Taurus: Doesn't want anything too complicated, not kink averse but doesn't like to be uncomfortable physically. But like at the same time I could see being into shibari? Like from the "likes rituals" angle. Prefers a long lead-up with a nice massage.

Gemini: You'd expect me to say switch here which could very well be correct lol (update the weed friend hit hard and fast, I have no idea how it will affect these thoughts going forward lol) Anyway, I think Geminis actually might often be service tops? Or maybe more like "I get off on what you get off on and that's so awesome" types? Sex echo-chamber, you know what I mean?

Cancer: So how often have you cried during or after sex? (Jk but also very not jk). If someone says the words "I want to make love to you" your pants are already off. You prefer soft, sweet words over dirty talk

Leo: Often tops, secretly wants to bottom more. Is adventurous (partially for the stories they get to tell later). Depending on the sun and rising combo with this, they may not be braggy--but absolutely if you're close friends with a Leo Moon you get to hear the juiciest shit

Virgo: A people pleaser, sometimes too much. Goes into Service Dom mode even when they want to be bottoming. Immediately cleans up after and makes sure everyone involved hydrates

Libra: Candles, lingerie (high update: had to look up how to spell this and then spent a little while saying LINGE-ER-EEEEE out loud). Anyway, loves feeling seductive/seduced. One of the only signs that can truly pull off a strip-tease on the fly (if you're a Leo moon you're probably mad reading that second sentence bc you think I should have put that in yours)

Scorpio: Dom Bottom in a kind of pillow princess way? Likes and is good at sexting. Doesn't want anyone to stay over unless they're like really into them. Is probably upset that I said Capricorns would be the best dominatrixes....dominatrixi.....dominatrices? (WAIT is it that one for real? that's the only one without a squiggle -I was doing that as a joke because of the plural of matrix...reading that back is making me realize i'm experiencing himbo high).

Sagittarius: Will try anything once, and even if it turns out not to be for them, doesn't have regrets about it--at least now they know, right? You know in The Sims when a Sim get really happy and walk really jaunty after Woohooing? Sagittarius.

This is all, I need to find a sandwich now

explaining rising and moon meanings in astrology from now on by saying "rising is who you are in the streets, moon is who you are in the sheets"

[totallyboatless]

It is time, friends, for another Pip's Weed Essay game. The rules: I'm about to take an edible and start writing a mini-essay in one sitting. I edit a tiny bit as I go, but for the most part this is on the fly. I've thought about this topic a lot, but haven't outlined it. I'll let you know when the edible hits, but there's a chance you'll realize it before I do. (PIRATE FRIENDS STICK AROUND - this is Pip from the future, I get pretty high in this, but anyway I'm here to tell you that this goes in a very unintended OFMD direction that i'm still reeling from. Anyway back to Past Pip)

Edible ingestion commencing, time: 7:37pm Mountain Time

I polled my followers for the topic, so today we're going to talk about:

Fixing the Puck Problem

I've read and seen A Midsummer Night's Dream more than any other Shakespeare play. At this point I don't know if I've seen it so much because it's my favorite, or enough opportunities for me to see it have lined up that it's become my favorite by default. It's easily the Shakespeare play I know best. I haven't seen a staging that I fully disliked, but there are two elements of this show that I feel like are rarely handled the way I want them to be.

Problem one:

Puck will never be as funny as Bottom

It's common to consider Puck to be the main character of A Midsummer Night's Dream. He's at the very least the most famous character in the play. Puck is a dream role, and obviously with his being a fairy, he's usually directed to be weird and whimsical--and a lot of the time, playing for laughs. It makes sense, he's a trickster, it's built into his nature.

But in modern day, his lines and actions don't translate as well as Bottom's. In all of the times that I've seen A Midsummer Night's Dream, I've *never* seen a production where Bottom fails to steal the entire show away from Puck. I've had multiple experiences where I could feel the director wanting me to laugh at Puck; I could see the reasons for the direction, but it just wouldn't hit. In those same productions, I've laughed so hard at the Bottom scenes that I cried.

I'm thinking particularly of the 2010 production with Judy Dench reprising Titania (honestly still in shock over seeing that lolol) and the 2019 Bridge Theatre production (which you can find streaming, it's *incredible*).

In the 2010 show, the Puck actor kept doing what honestly felt like a Woody the Woodpecker impression lol. He would pause for laughs and they just...wouldn't happen. Meanwhile, Bottom was set up with the kind of success that let him steal at least one scene from fucking Judy Dench.

In the 2019 Bridge Theatre production, I genuinely like the direction they gave Puck--he's a weird little twitchy Irish punk doing fucking aerial silk shit. But even with a unique vibe and a fun performance, it's still not enough to outshine Bottom.

Basically my thing is that I want to get to the end of A Midsummer Night's Dream and feel more connected to Puck. I *want* him to be my favorite. And there's just absolutely no way to make him my favorite if his core purpose is to be funny. Puck is supposed to be a larger-than-life being--the audience is never going to buy that when he's not even the largest character on the stage.

The second problem is smaller, and in fixing it there's also a fun chance to fix the Puck problem:

Problem two:

The audience usually doesn't understand why Titania and Oberon are fighting.

If you've gotten this far you're probably already a nerd who knows this, but gonna pose the question like I've done for other people I've seen the show with: Why are Titania and Oberon fighting? What's the core reason?

Bc you're a fucking nerd you probably yelled CHANGELING! Which yes, good for you, if I had become the Shakespeare professor I wanted to be but didn't have the money to become, you would be in my class and I would throw a snickers at you for a reward.

But the thing is, a *lot* of people who only know the play casually don't know. And most productions don't assist them in knowing.

Elaboration for non-nerds: Titania had a "and they were roommates" totally not at all lesbian relationship with a human women who was pregnant. The women dies in childbirth and Titania takes the child to raise, and she cherishes him more than anything, which is an extremely straight thing to do. In the play, the character is only referred to as the changeling. Oberon gets super jealous of this kid and wants to steal him away and make him join the Wild Hunt so that he can have Titania's full attention back, because he's got that issue creepy men get when they have kids and then are like "I'm jealous of my son because he's making it less likely for me to fuck my wife" and it's like "dude calm down with this projection of an Oedipal complex."

If you're not a coward and read Titania as in love with the changeling's mom, then Oberon's issues are maybe slightly less creepy, but like not really

So that's it really. Titania loves this kid of her sapphic lover that died. Oberon is jealous about it. He decides to play a trick on Titania both as a way to get revenge, and also as a distraction so he can steal the kid.

But the issue is that 1.) all of this is communicated in a long and kind of boring speech, and 2.) the changeling literally never has a line and also no stage directions

The 2010 production had a hot dude chained up and writhing on stage in a kind of hot dance snake movement thing when Titania talks about him, but most productions never even have an actor cast as the changeling. I was really shocked they didn't have anyone for the 2019 production, given how much I love most of the rest of their choices.

OKAY SO. We now have the two problems: Puck isn't the fan favorite even though he should be; and most people in the audience have no fucking idea about the changeling.

(THIS IS HIGH PIP FROM THE FUTURE I FORGOT SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT TO THIS PROBLEM: If you do know about the changeling/follow along with that plot, it's *very* hard to root for Titania and Oberon when they reconcile. Which can be fun and cool and a little hot even maybe if you're going all dark, but thIS IS A PLAY ABOUT HORNY FAERIES HAVING A GOOD TIME so I won't be having that. I want this play to make me like that Titania forgives Oberon so easily. Okay Past Pip, take it away)

lol okay yeah weed friend has landed, I just wandered away for a minute with a desperate need to put taquitos in the air fryer. Time stamp: 8:16.

OKAY FOR REAL NOW LET'S GET INTO:

Pip's Most Ideal Staging of A Midsummer Night's Dream Which Fixes the Problems in Theory

The Staging:

First off I want the production to be in the middle of the literal woods where there's pretty lights in all the trees and people are sitting on blankets and have snacks and drinks and drugs and whatever they want, and the whole staging has the actors weaving through the audience. Not just theatre in the round, full immersion

I also want people to not fully know where the production is, just that it's on the outskirts of the forest, and then the actors emerge from the woods at a designated time and bring the audience to the secret stage section. And ideally this would be like a park on the outskirts of woods so that there would also be people there who wouldn't know what the fuck was going on. And ideally some of the fairy actors convince them to come along and the people go having no idea what they're about to get into. That's how A Midsummer Night's Dream is meant to be experienced in its purest form: with actors dressed as fairies trying to seduce unsuspecting strangers to follow them into the woods to an unknown location where they'll probably be offered drugs.

TAQUITO TIME

Taquitos acquired.

Puck's direction and motivation:

When Puck is first introduced, it's by a fairy called Peasblossom who's otherwise not a big part. Peasblossom lets the audience know who Puck/Robin Goodfellow is by basically going stan-mode and being like "holy shit you're famous." PB literally starts listing his greatest hits.

So picture with me: instead of an extremely fairy-like whimsical Puck, I want a Puck that wanders on-stage like a burnt-out rockstar. Cigarette in one hand, beer in another. Probably on a cocktail for faerie super magic mushrooms. Just fully numbed out. In this moment, Puck feels way more human than faerie--and I want the performance to be in a way where that feels off. To have it be communicated in manner and clothing, and the juxtaposition of PB recounting Puck's glory days, that Puck hasn't always been like this. This isn't a faerie trickster in his prime. This is a man who's lost all sense of fun and is going through the motions.

That's what happens, right, when you become just a little too famous?

Puck is the only one of the main characters who gets to the end of the show and is entirely alone.

(my favorite thing about being high is how *good* it makes food taste, these taquitos are not fancy but with the power of the devil's lettuce it's so good--oh my god I have Dr. Pepper)

(I'm back with the Dr. Pepper. I'm having fun, are you guys having fun? If you've made it this far i kiss u)

So Puck is alone at the end of the play while everyone else of import is either with their lover or with their theatre-kid-found-family. And it's largely because Puck lives between worlds. He's not powerful enough to be fey royalty; he's Oberon's right-hand man, but he's not Oberon's peer. But the lower fey court are also not his peers -- they treat him like a celebrity, he can't actually connect with them. He's not allowed to frolic and play with them anymore, not really.

With this interpretation and direction, we now have a Puck whose action in the plot can lead to a happy ending (keep with me), and whose existence isn't just to be quirky and whimsical for the audience. Instead it's a Puck with a motivation: he's lost all joy in his job, he's disconnected from him community, and Oberon only treats him like a fuckbuddy so he's sexually frustrated. (Oh right yeah I was supposed to write about how Puck is in love with Oberon. He is.) That's all fucking sad, bro! And you know from the Pip that traveled into the past that this play is fun and should be fun!

Now for the final part, where we put in the special ingredient to tie this particular Puck direction into the happy ending:

LET'S 👏 GET 👏 GAY 👏

Do you guys (gn) remember the changeling? It was like possibly an hour ago, the time-warp this particular edible always sets me on has fully set in. It's possible this essay is like 5k words long. It's also possible it's only 500 words long. I wish I was lying when I told you I don't know.

Anyway, the changeling. Let's make him a fuller character and let's give him to Puck wrapped up in a sexy, charming bow.

Picture this: The Changeling, from now on capitalized as a character, shown on stage in Titania's court. Locked up like a princess in a tower because Titania is desperate to protect him. And the Changeling is all *sigh and flutter big beautiful princess man eyes* because he wants to explore what's out there. Because he's a man who's grown up and been forced to live between two worlds. He's not fey royalty, he's not Titania's actual kid and she kind of honestly treats him more like a momento of her lesbian lover than an actual adopted kid. He can't be one of the fey court, because he's not fey, and also he's not allowed to frolic and play with them.

That should sound familiar to you if I did it right.

Puck and the Changeling, both feeling the same sort of empty spot. So let's smush them together.

Give the Changeling all of Peasblossom's lines. It makes more sense for a detail I left out before, too--Peasblossom doesn't recognize Puck they see him for the first few lines. Once they do they're all like "omg you're the dude that makes people horny for each other and also some other trickster things." They know all of Puck's stunts, but they don't know what he looks like? It's clearly an exposition device, but it's a weak one (sorry, Shakesy). He's the rockstar of the fey world. You'd have to be living under a rock or, I dunno, locked away like a beautiful man-princess --

(Okay you know where I'm going and I have to stop there because I'm cry laughing, I swear to you -- I swear to fucking god, guys, I wish I was joking -- I thought I was being cute and clever saying "man-princess". Not because of irony. IT'S BECAUSE I FORGOT THERE IS A WORD FOR A PRINCESS WHO IS A MAN AND THAT IS A PRINCE. Okay i should clearly wrap this up lol)

In this staging, the Changeling clearly doesn't want to be locked up. So...he finally finds a way to sneak out. He goes on a romp through the forest and that's when he runs into Puck (this is the scene where we first meet Puck). The Changeling wouldn't recognize Puck, though he's have heard of him. He probably loves stories because what the fuck else does he have to do, so he's asked the fairies to tell him about Puck's adventures over and over. Meanwhile, Puck wouldn't recognize the Changeling because Titania has been keeping him so under lock and key. It allows an opportunity for them to connect on more of a peer basis as they--

Holy fuck. Wait. Hold on. Is the Changeling Stede. Is Puck Ed. What the fuck. Did I write an AU on accident. I don't even like AUs very much (sorry AU writers it's not personal it's just not my thing).n ANYWAY sorry for the pirate aside. God this is properly off the rails now.

They like each other, you get it. And now Puck has someone he wants to impress. There's not a lot of opportunities to give the Changeling more lines, but that doesn't mean he can't appear on stage. He can stay with Puck (hiding from Oberon whenever he's there, leading to some good chances for physical comedy) and go on the nighttime adventure of his dreams.

This leads to a fun, unique choice: having Puck fuck up the love flower juice plan on purpose. So that he can show this hot dude following him around with wide enthusiastic eyes the kind of things he's capable of OH MY GOD THIS IS ED AND STEDE I SWEAR THIS IS NOT ON PURPOSE I AM JUST NOW SEEING THE PARALLEL

Okay we're nearly at the end I promise. We just have one more problem to solve: How are we supposed to root for Titania and Oberon to get together when Oberon literally publicly humiliates her and then steals her adopted son and forces him to join the Wild Hunt even tho Titania REALLY doesn't want him to? Well, the first one is easy, Titania and Oberon are so fucking kinky, and Oberon likes getting cucked (remember he's only jealous of the Changeling, never the lesbian).

The second one is also easy. Make it the Changeling's choice. Leaving Titania and joining Oberon's court means two things: He gets to be with Puck, and joining the Wild Hunt allows him to go on exciting adventures. If Titania saw that the Changeling wanted this with the staging that both Titania and Oberon look over and see Puck and the Changeling making out right after Titania's spell is broken. Then Oberon can jokingly delivers the line about having stolen the Changeling, realizing that the plan worked but in the most ridiculous way possible. And how could Titania not find joy in all of that?

It makes me so much more glad to see them get back together.

Puck's closing soliloquy is his most famous, but I like his last big monologue right before it better. There's a very important line he says that communicates an important shift within the context of his particular staging:

And we fairies, that do run

We.

Puck isn't a lonely, washed-up rockstar anymore. He's part of a "we." Not just the Changeling, but the other fairies, too. Puck and the Changeling act as bridges for each other, to be part of each other's worlds in a way that feels like a whole -- OH MY GOD IT IS ED AND STEDE

Puck being alone on stage isn't so sad anymore, after all that. Because Puck, who starts off the play with so little sense of belonging, now has so much to go back to.

And that's it, that's my ideal staging of this play. Honestly, I really, really want to direct it. I have no experience directing but I have the audacity to think I could do it lol. No resources, tho

OH ONE LAST THING HELENA NEEDS TO BE INTO PUP PLAY

also the lovers are all in a polycule, that's just a given, any other staging is cowardly

alright bbye

[exit]

final time stamp: 9:25 PM, not rereading, just hitting post. We die like Mercutio.

[totallyboatless]

Pip Gets High and Writes an Essay: Wrestling and Shakespeare Edition

Hello friends, today was stressful and I want to distract myself, so it is time for another writing-while-high game. For those new, here's the breakdown:

I'm about to take an edible. I'll time stamp when I took it and when I've realized it's hit. You will almost certainly realize it's hit before me

I will write this in one go with minimal editing. If I got back to edit or add a note, it will be from "Pip From the Future" who will be significantly more high

This is a topic I've thought about before, but have never sat down to write out

Additional notes:

I was super into wrestling when I was a kid in the 90s/early 2000s, fell off of it, and then was reintroduced this January when my boyfriend got me into AEW (I'm almost entirely going to be talking about AEW btw--I'm not as into WWE). So though it's become a significant hyperfixation this year, I'm still new to modern-day wrestling. Please forgive the inevitable mess ups.

2. I love Shakespeare with a passion and have taken a handful of classes and seen a lot of performances, but I'm by no means a scholar. Please forgive the inevitable mess ups.

OKAY WITH THAT: Devil's candy eaten at 10:22pm Mountain Time.

Now let's get into:

Wrestling is More Shakespearean Than Many Modern Day Shakespeare Performances

Part 1: When the Audience is a Character, Theatre Hits Different

I wrote about this in my previous weed-induced essay, but one of my favorite performances of A Midsummer Night's Dream of all time is the 2019 Bridge Theatre's version with Gwendolyn Christie (it was filmed, highly recommend checking it out on the National Theatre streaming service or...by other means). There's a whole lot to love about the production (it's so gay, guys, like SO gay), but one of the absolute highlights is the way that the stage is set up.

The stage is like theatre-in-the-round on crack. It's made up of multiple moving parts, and as the tech crew attaches and detaches parts of the stage to move throughout the space, the crowd needs to ebb and flow along with them. The actors engage directly with the audience, often as the catalyst to get them to move in order to make way for the stage changing.

Anyone who's ever studied Shakespeare, even in the most casual of ways, knows that in the original productions, especially for the Comedies, the audience was encouraged to interact with the show and actors--it was deeply immersive. The Globe Theatre isn't fully in the round, but it almost is; no matter where someone sat or stood, they could see the face of another audience member. Their shared reactions and interactions were an integral part of the experience.

This wasn't unique to Shakespeare, but this setup works particularly well when dealing with stories whose core (no matter the genre) are about visceral human experiences. Being able to feel something, whether it's joy or pain, and directly see someone else experiencing the same thing in the same way amplifies theatre in a gorgeous way. There's nothing like that feeling of connection with someone you'll never talk to.

Seeing the recorded Bridge Theatre's production of A Midsummer Night's Dream made me realize how much I missed that feeling of being completely immersed in a story, and I still feel so jealous when I watch the audience in the recording. I fucking love being surrounded by people whose bodies thrum along with my energy at a show. Shortly after watching it, I went to see a live performance of A Winter's Tale, and it was a good time--but it was on a normal stage, the barrier between the audience and the story well established. It was a show being performed at the audience, not with them.

And that's how most modern day theatre productions are, Shakespeare or not. And it makes sense from a logistics perspective--a lot of people are assholes when they're given the freedom to interact with a show. They take advantage, especially in the age of social media when the temptation to do something to make you go viral is there. And people pay a lot of money for live theatre now and don't want their experience disrupted. (it's high Pip from the future--I finally realized the thing I wanted to say here that was going to make for a better segue: Shakespeare doesn't just love the idea of an immersed audiences, he also saw the magic of "audience as character." So many of his plays break the fourth wall and are meant to be delivered to the audience not as performance but as someone sharing their deepest secrets to a friend). I get it, but in some ways it feels like an opportunity at magic is lost.

UNTIL I GOT INTO THE BIG MEATY MEN SLAPPIN' MEAT

It wasn't hard to sell me on wrestling since I already loved it as a kid, but there was one video in particular that my boyfriend showed me that flipped the switch so hard my brain lit up like Mark Briscoe got a hold of the pyrotechnics.

The video in question is Invisible Man vs. Invisible Stan, in which two invisible wrestlers fight each other. When my boyfriend first told me about this, I thought two dudes in green suits were going to come out, or that everybody was going to pretend they couldn't see two real-life dudes. But my guys IT IS A FULL FIGHT BETWEEN TWO IMAGINARY WRESTLERS.

I'm not kidding in the least when I say this video is one of my top favorite pieces of art from the modern world. It's a story told entirely by two entities: The referee (Bryce Remsburg) and the audiences. And yeah, I'm considering the audience one entity--just watch the video, the way they all meld together is WILD. The crowd is fully bought in, they all take cues off of Bryce and each other in order to collectively decide where the Invisible Man and Invisible Stan are and they move accordingly. That bit where one of the wrestlers goes up to the balcony and jumps down, and like 10 people all fall in unison as if they've been landed on--are you KIDDING ME?! That shit is some of the best improvisational collaborative storytelling I've ever seen--and it could never have happened if the audience wasn't as much of a character as Bryce or the wrestlers. Seriously go watch it, it's incredible.

"The audience is a character" is a sacred rule in pro wrestling--audience participation is the meat of what moves storylines along, and can (and has) literally change(d) the course of character arcs over the years. They set the tone for matches: for the audience back home, for the actors, and most importantly for each other. They chant together, they hold signs together, they gasp together.

(They chant "he's gay he's gay he's gay" in the kindest way those words have ever been spoken -- high Pip from the future, i went to go grab the link to insert bc i had forgot and i rewatched the video so the rest of this video.........this is not a video, but it's playing in my head as one. Anyway I'm tearing up that is such a good gay moment. Also for non-wrestling people reading this -- why are you reading this? -- that tall blonde man is named Daddy Ass. I need you all to go look up the story of how "Scissor me, Daddy Ass" came to be if you do not know it. Unrelated my keyboard feels like it's tilting)

They give the ability for actors to feel more immersed, themselves. A wild crossover I never expected: Anthony Burch (DM for Dungeons & Daddies) held up a sign for a Kenny Omega match that references a years-long storyline that's HONESTLY HEARTBREAKING LIKE JESUS FUCK THE GAY TEARS IT MAKES ME CRY THEY CALLED THEMSELVES THE GOLDEN LOVERS ARE YOU *KIDDING* ME--

(Aside: Is this the first time the edible hits and I realize the same time as you guys? Time 11:17pm, almost an hour after taking it. Or am I going to read this back tomorrow and be like "what the fuck that is gibberish.")

Anyway, I'm not going to go into it (that's Super Eyepatch Wolf's job)--all you need to know is Anthony's sign stopped Kenny Omega in his tracks. His face changes as he sees the sign, and it feels like the energy from that reaction carries him through the rest of the match. It gives a beautiful additional motivation to his character actions--and it never could have happened without an audience that was alive.

TL;DR and main point of part 1: Wrestling understands theatre-in-the-round productions and audience immersion in a way that many theatres don't understand or utilize the vast power of, and I think going to a live wrestling show would finally sate that desire that the Bridge Theatre's A Midsummer Nights Dream makes me feel that I haven't been able to find.

Shakespeare would fucking lose his shit over wrestling, man. He would be like "this is real theatre, baby." I'm not joking. I think he'd think that. And not just because of the "audience as character." OH HEY WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT

Part 2: Good Wrestling Stories Are Fueled By a Core Made of Visceral Human Experiences of Joy and Pain and Mortality and Legacy, Shakespeare also did that

Nailed it, what a good title

When we talk about Shakespeare not being as high bro and pretentious as the general public often thinks it is, we're not just talking about the dick jokes (though there's a lot of dick jokes).

(Aside: I'm not sure who the "we" is I'm referring to--who the fuck am i to be using academic talk i literally just spent too long that i want to admit trying to spell academic)

(Aside again: aHIGHed. Is that anything? That's nothing. Don't look at me)

Shakespeare isn't just low-brow, it's also incredibly accessible on a story level. Obviously the language is hard to overcome, but if you boil any Shakespeare story to its bones to explain to someone, they're stories almost everyone can relate to in some way:

In the tragedies:

The experience of deep grief, and the existential crisis of mortality that comes with it

Loving deeply and passionately while the world tells you it's better to hate, and the existential crisis of mortality that comes with it

The desire for legacy, how your story will be written in the minds of those left behind, and the existential crisis of mortality that comes with it

In the comedies:

The hilarity of being part of a friend group when relationship drama is going down, and you know two of your friends have a crush on each other

Having a fantasy about romping around with horny faeries in the forest

Enjoying sex jokes, twins, and weddings

Doing trans shit and then being really bisexual about it

Good wrestling, when it boils down to it, approaches storylines in a similar way of centering visceral human emotions.

So which genre is wrestling? It can be sad and happy and gay, sometimes all at once.

Wait I thought of a funnier way to say this:

Broke: Wrestling can't be put into a Shakespeare genre of Tragedy or Comedy because it's both at times

Woke: Wresting is a History

(Aside: GOD this is like the core of what I wanted to write about but it's almost midnight and I am p r o p e r high now, I keep staring off into space and my beanie is squeezing my head--if you like this next part and want me to talk about it more maybe i'll do it sober)

(Aside: I was about to go into a full aside here about Prince Nana and the ongoing bit from multiple characters that they want his weed...but we don't have time for that)

My favorite Shakespearean monologue is the "Let's talk of graves, of worms, and epitaphs" speech from King Richard II. I have those first words tattooed on my upper thigh, like some kind of pretentious slut. Anyway, the monologue is all about how kings only become kings and stop being kings due to one main thing: death. And there's this part that goes:

For within the hollow crown that rounds the mortal temples of a king keeps death his court

In a recording of Ian McKellen receiting these words, he takes a crown and tilts it at the audience until it becomes an O.

A crown is something that's coveted, given so much weight and meaning and power. And yet when you look in the middle, it's ultimately hollow.

Belts are crowns, you got I was going there, right? A wrestling belt is a stand in for a crown, it's a symbol of proven power, it's coveted beyond anything else. But ultimately, it's hollow.

And just like with kings, there's only way one to win a belt and to lost a belt.

Well like metaphorically. It's not death with this one, and it's not like when wrestlers lose their characters die off. But like defeat is a metaphor for death in this. You get me.

There are.....

Fuck my brain is fully breaking friends, lol. This weed friend has sent my mind to space. I gotta wrap it. There's some more thoughts on this, and wanting to tie some parallel stories (Orange Cassidy has big Prince Hal vibes, etc.) Maybe I'll return to this sober, or maybe this is way too niche of a crossover and no one will read this lol. If you read this, I appreciate you.

I'm truly unsure if this is readable but i gotta commit to this bit even tho i just got freaked out by my own fingers for a second (we're good now) so gonna post

/end