#pick up the phone bitch

[syn4k]

cold world out there, kids, grab your coats

[light-miracles]

Edward being tackled by Bella after trying to walk into the sunlight in Volterra: Heaven 😢💜

Alice in the background, hair pointing in all directions, eyes mad: PURGATORY

[lilithofpenandbook]

My sympathy for Snape in POA has gone a hundred times up now that my shitty grandmother is potentially going to be using our house as an inn

[raddogakito]

happy birthday, lil bro.

eh- akiyama?

[wayvtual]

i feel like a changed person bc yesterday a customer was yelling at me over their food n instead of getting angry n arguing back i just kept thinking what kind of stupid ass complaint is this omg like it made me embarrassed for her

[anotherpapercut]

people are literally so fucking impatient. bro I am on crutches. you can wait 30 more seconds to board this fucking plane

[gelarshiesprofruitboarder]

yall sorry i'm so late to the party, had theater auditions!!! anyways this is your schoolhouse rock of the day, and it's got some neat history to it! this short was initially titled "the greatest show on earth" when it released in 1979 as the last short featured in science rock, and 16 YEARS LATER they were sued by ringling bros, who owned the phrase and used it for their circus. so they had to fucking take it off the air and remove any mention of "greatest show on earth" from the song 😭 it was retroactively renamed to the way blander "the weather show" and yeah!! there's actually a handful of schoolhouse rock controversies if you ever wanna hear, for now take this(old airing, this is just before they took it off the air so it's the "greatest show on earth" version) song, which is honestly pretty mid outside of its history. if i had to describe it in a few words, defo "tax man max lite"

HHHGSJDBKEHEKE THATS SO FUNNY

[sonnykissed]

I want to experience the level of happiness the MJF girlies (gn) are experiencing right now

[racingmiku2018]

i remember when me and my siblings were helping my dad pack up to move apartments one of us accidentally packed his full inhaler with the empty ones and we brought that box of inhalers to the new place and drove back to the old one and when my dad found out he said "ill just let myself die if i have an asthma attack" and then later in the night he did have an asthma attack and i had to call an ambulance for him and when they got there they helped him with his stupid asthma and then had to help me because i was having a panic attack bc i thought i had put the inhaler in the wrong box and it wouldve been my fault if he died. i was 15

[cakerollk]

Idk what peoples pure hatred for phone calls come from but if I'm calling u about a gig slot but no one picks up AND you don't call back after I sent a text, you don't get to go on a smear campaign saying I'm "playing favourites" bc other dancers have the decency to REPLY to me saying they accept the gig

[coolcat101s]

I hate when I’m trying to make a phone call and the automated system is like “hey you can do that online :D” like yeah dumbass I know, your online service is being Fucky that’s why I’m calling

[roeswater]

I call my friends and say shit like “I missed you I wanted to hear the sound of your voice”

[gaylianbeast]

My boss is so pathetic I was leaving with 2 coworkers and he followed us out of the emergency door probably to tell me to do overtime again tomorrow but I was already inside my car with all my lights off so he didn't see me sgfjshjdhd literally looked left and right like a cartoon character then went back inside.... that's why you have to wear your prescription glasses you fucking moron I was literally parked in front of him... old cunt

[fingertipsmp3]

I’m always so fascinated by people’s bad roommate stories. I’m not sure I’ll ever live with someone I haven’t vetted extensively beforehand ever again

[deadpanwalking]

One time when my mom told me I can leave the house if I didn't like her discipling me, I actually packed up my little blanket roll and stood outside our apartment door sobbing because I didn't know what really lies beyond the stairwell to the lobby and front door if I'd actually had to go there alone

When I was 9, I came into school crying and said goodbye to all my friends because my mother spent the previous night convincing me I was being sent to live in a foster home—that woman never did anything by halves, so the suitcases were packed, the toys were on the curb, I was debriefed on what to expect (she came up with this intense backstory for the foster family). Unfortunately, my teacher overheard, and my hysteria landed me in the principal's office, where I got to play the xylophone over the intercom for the morning announcements, and was allowed to do my DMP worksheets at the secretary's desk until everything was sorted out.

[firelise]

JEALOUSY?? At a time like this? I wanna live in mings head just for one fucking moment so I can see how tf someone could have rationalized that