#phantom ellie ofmd

[phantom-ellie]

The Full Experience

Based on a post by @snake-snack-stede

Rating: General Audiences

Category: M/M

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death (TV)

Relationship: Black Pete/Lucius Spriggs

Characters: Black Pete (Our Flag Means Death), Lucius Spriggs, Stede Bonnet, Crew of the Revenge (Our Flag Means Death)

Additional Tags:, Humor, Black Pete Loves Lucius Spriggs, Black Pete is a loveable dope, black pete is sweet (in his own kind of way), Black Pete is trying

Black Pete imagined the fiercest of battles when his crew (okay, Stede's crew, but also his, Pete was basically a leader now) would retake the Revenge. He would vault over the side of the ship with dramatic flare, take out enemy pirates left and right, corner Blackbeard somewhere on the ship where there's a corner, and demand his boyfriend back. And Blackbeard would say something like, "Wow, Pete, I am so impressed by how you took out all my men and cornered me here in this corner-y area, Lucius is over there, and also you're my new first mate because Izzy kinda low-key sucks?" And Pete would ask for time to think about it, and then after waiting a few days (okay minutes, he'd wait minutes) he would graciously accept.

So it was a bit of a jolt to his system when a waterlogged Lucius was hauled on boat the dinghy with the rest of the crew minutes after they set off from the island.

Lucius gasped and sputtered and coughed up a goldfish, which Buttons gleefully and immediately popped into his mouth.

"Lucius!" Stede scolded. "It's hardly the right time to be going for a swim, is it? We barely have enough room as it is."

"Oh god," was all Lucius could reply.

"What were you doing in the ocean, babe?" Black Pete asked, not not disappointed that his rescue mission was called off.

"Gee, I don't know, Stede's crazy boyfriend pushed me overboard!"

Various members of the grew gasped, and Stede said, "I don't have a boyfriend! Who is he talking about?" and then the crew all together yelled, "BLACKBEARD," and Stede said, "Oh."

Black Pete crossed his arms. "You're saying Blackbeard tried to kill you? No way."

"Yes way," Lucius sat up and brushed seaweed off his ugly tattered striped shirt. "I was being friendly and trying to get him to talk about his feelings and he tried to murder me!"

Everyone gasped again, followed by Stede saying, "Well, I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it, Lucius, and anyways it's a good idea to perform random swim checks..."

"That's so fucking awesome! Babe, I can't believe it!" Pete grabbed Lucius by the shirt and shook him a bit.

"What do you mean, awesome? I could've died!"

"Yeah, but like... you could've died... by Blackbeard's hand, babe! You got the full Blackbeard experience!"

There was silence in the dinghy as everyone processed this.

"Pete, what happened to, 'I'm not used to your death?'"

"Well, that was the first time, gotta get used to it sometime, babe. And it was Blackbeard! Did he mention me? Did he mention me while he threw you overboard?"

Lucius sighed and put his hand on his head. "No, Pete, he was a little busy trying to drown me."

Pete shrugged. "Well that's too bad, but still, I'm so happy for you! And a little jealous? What was it like?"

"To be almost murdered by Blackbeard?"

"Yes, to be almost murdered by the most awesome pirate ever known!"

Lucius sighed a bit. He was in love with an idiot. He could get sympathy later. Maybe. From someone with a bit more emotional intelligence. Although, looking around, he might have been out of luck on that front.

"I guess it was, fine? I haven't been pushed off a ship before."

"And you survived! Blackbeard tried to kill you, and you live!"

"Pretty badass!" Roach piped in.

"I stabbed Blackbeard once," Stede muttered to himself.

The overloaded dinghy lurched its way towards its destiny, one pair of lovers reunited already.

[thequeenhasnolife]

The Lost Children of Ikatera is fully posted. 🎉🎉Thank you to my writer without Ellie who is such a genuine friend and person to work with. I was so happy to collaborate.

@phantom-ellie read their stories

@ofmd-reverse-bang for hosting this wonderful event

And this is a reverse bang. Here is the artwork.

[genderenvyelimination]

Second Round Masterlist:

4/3/2023:

Baron | The Cat Returns vs. Sylvie | Epithet Erased

Hunter | Rain World vs. Pure Vessel | Hollow Knight

Otachi | Pacific Rim vs. Zagreus | Hades (Supergiant Games)

Rika | Pokemon vs. Transformed Howl | Howl's Moving Castle

Ganon's Corpse | Breath of the Wild 2 vs. Kaworu Nagisa |Neon Genesis Evangelion

Milo Thatch | Atlantis vs. Ryo Asuka | Devilman 1972

Gomez Addams | Addams Family vs. Thanatos | Hades

Blahaj | IKEA vs. Marcy Wu | Amphibia

Calcifer | Howl's Moving Castle vs. Nausicaa | Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind

Toy Soldier | The Mechanisms vs. Dio Brando | Jojo's Bizarre Adventure

Mollymauk Tealeaf | Critical Role vs. Crona | Soul Eater

Herbert West | Reanimator vs. Magnus Chase | Magnus Chase Series

4/4/3023:

Desire | Sandman vs. Candace Flynn | Phineas and Ferb

Goblin King | Labyrinth vs. Kimiko Ross | Dresden Codak

Link | Breath of the Wind vs. Cecil | Welcome to Night Vale

Lucienne | Sandman vs. Testament | Guilty Gear

Ekko | Arcane vs. Stevonnie | Steven Universe

Newt Geisler | Pacific Rim vs. Gabrielle De Lioncourt | Vampire Chronicles

Rohan Kishibe | Jojo's Bizarre Adventure vs. Yamato | One Piece

Koki Kariya | The World Ends With You vs. Super Star Rockin' Jay | Ninjago

Legolas | Lord of the Rings vs. N | Pokemon

Goro Akechi | Persona 5 Royale vs. Garry | Ib

Bold & Brash | Spongebob Squarepants vs. Simon Petrikov | Adventure Time

Byleth | Fire Emblem 3 Houses vs. Spectile | Pokemon

4/5/2023:

Hawks | BNHA vs. Meta Knight | Kirby

Professor Venomous | OKKO vs. Double Trouble | She-ra

Johnny C. | Johnny The Homicidal Maniac vs. Lyfrassir Edda | The Mechanisms

Dr. Robotnik | Sonic Movie vs. Zuko | Avatar the Last Airbender

Blue Spirit | Avatar the Last Airbender vs. Kaname Date | Ai: Somnium Files

Will Graham | Hannibal vs. Kusuriuri | Ayakashi: Samurai Horror Tales

Lewis Pepper | Mystery Skulls vs. Eda Clawthorne | The Owl House

E-boy Wojak | Meme Culture vs. Spectra | Bakugan

Cure Chocolat | Kira Kira Precure a la Mode vs. Maleficient | Maleficient

Dean Winchester | Supernatural vs. Onceler | Lorax

Joker | Persona 5 Royale vs. Dr. Franken Stein | Soul Eater

Nagito Komaeda | Danganronpa vs. Donatello Hamato | ROTTMNT

4/6/2023:

Greg House | House MD vs. Carla | Dumbing of Age

Klavier Gavin | Ace Attorney vs. Marty McFly | Back to the Future

Elias | Ancient Magnus Bride vs. 4th Phase Ghouls | Ghost

John Mitchell | Being Human UK vs. Zasp | Bug Fables

Kuvira | ATLA vs. Ed Elric | FMA

Mr. Fox | Fantastic Mr. Fox vs. Fujimoto | Ponyo

Jean Descole | Professor Layton vs. Ryan Akagi | Infinity Train

Blackbeard | OFMD vs. Aragorn | LOTR

Alex Fierro | Magnus Chase vs. Juno Steel | Penumbra Podcast

Red Lizard | Rain World vs. Mae | Night in the Woods

Jinx | Arcane vs. Grusha | Pokemon

Jack Sparrow | POTC vs. Medic | TF2

4/7/2023:

Korra | Legend of Korra vs. Tim Curry Characters | Clue, Rocky Horror

Gunpowder Tim | The Mechanisms vs. Wizard | wizardisananimal

Sonic | Sonic vs. Team Rocket | Pokemon

Ilima | Pokemon vs. Grell Sutcliff | Black Butler

Espresso Cookie | Cookie Run vs. Ralsei | Deltarune

Ellie Sattler | Jurassic Park vs. Ryuko | Kill La Kill

Columbo | Columbo vs. Beast Wirt | OTGW

Jennifer Check - Jennifer's Body vs. JD - Heathers

Gerry Keay | TMA vs. Kris Dreemurr | Deltarune

Ranma Saotome | Ranma 1/2 vs. Alucard/Adrian Fahrenheit Tepes | Castlevania

ENA | ENA vs. Raine Whispers | TOH

Danny Fenton | Danny Phantom vs. Papa Emeritus III | Ghost bc

Rouxls Kaard | Deltarune vs. Arven | Pokemon

Denji | Chainsaw Man vs. Haruka Tenou | Sailor Moon

[phantom-ellie]

To Wit: Macarena!

“How do you feel about the French?”

“Fuck the French. Good loot, squeal when they die. Stores smell like shit, all that cheese-”

“I meant culture, Edward.”

“Well, why didn’t you say so? I try to think about it as little as possible while I’m stealing all that cheese.”

There’s laughter as Ed buries his face in Stede’s neck, arms around each others’ waists, swaying back and forth to silence.

“I could teach you to minuet.”

“Sounds like a dance for assholes.”

“Maybe it’s the dance for you, then. What about the courante?”

“We could cour-not.”

“And the gigue?”

“Makes me wanna gag.”

Ed knows Stede wants to scold him but he’s giggling and beaming instead, cheeks pink from brandy. They’ll both regret it in the morning. But now? Dance lessons.

Of course, Ed doesn’t really care to learn these fancy dances, not anymore. Who’s he going to impress? The only one whose opinion he cares about is already in his arms, eyes closed and humming along to an imaginary orchestra. But a little romance, a little foreplay, they never hurt, do they?

“Stede, let me spin you, I’m gonna…” Ed raises Stede’s left hand with his right and spins him around, like they’ve practiced maybe forty times tonight. Stede sways off balance and Ed has to catch him.

Stede pants a bit. “There’s the Allemande. It’s German.”

“I thought you were teaching me fancy French dances.”

“It is French, ‘Allemande’ means ‘German’ in French. So it’s both. I think?”

“I’m not learning a dance that doesn’t even know what it is.”

Stede giggles again. “You’re a terrible student, Ed.”

Ed kisses him on the nose. “Maybe you should be teaching me how to learn.”

“That doesn’t make any sense!” Stede kisses him back.

They both stop simultaneously and hold each other for a few seconds, feeling the buzz of alcohol rush through their heads.

“What about you, Ed? Do you know any special dances?” Stede asks with a whisper, playing with the top of Ed’s shirt.

“Oh yeah, loads of dances. Secret pirate dances, you wouldn’t believe how good I am at dancing.” Ed puffs out his chest a bit in the way he knows Stede finds endearing.

Stede smiles fondly. “Well, it’s only fair that you show me some, isn’t it? If I’m going to be a pirate?”

“You’re already a pirate, you don’t need to dance like one.”

Stede leans in and brushes his lips against Ed’s. “Maybe I want to.”

Ed huffs and stands back, shaking off his arms and legs a bit. “Well, maybe I can show you one. Just so you don’t embarrass yourself.”

“You mean during a raid?”

“Yeah, a raid. Wouldn’t want to look like a shitty pirate in front of the French.”

“You mean if, during a raid, I stopped swashbuckling and just… busted a move on the deck?”

Ed nods encouragingly. “Yes, just like that. I’d clear a spot, keep them off you. Maybe a six-foot radius where you could go to town.”

“Get me ten feet and I think I could really groove.” They look at each other for all of three seconds before bursting into laughter.

“Groove!” Ed gasps, holding his stomach with both arms.

Stede is also doubled over, one hand on the wall to hold himself up. “I could hold on to the railing and ghost ride the whip!”

“No!” Ed is gasping, his abdomen really hurts laughing at that image. He tries to calm himself down. “No, you couldn’t, not with… not with the pirate dance I’m gonna teach ya.”

Stede looks up at him, eyes shining. “You’re really going to teach me something?”

“Fuck yeah, come over here. Stand up straight.”

Stede does his best to follow those simple directions, but it’s getting harder the drunker they get.

“Now this dance… it’s an important dance to pirate culture. All pirates know it.”

“Does Izzy know this dance?”

“Fuck yeah, Izzy knows all about it, taught it to him my fuckin’ self.”

“No, I don’t believe you.”

“Ask him to show you later.”

“I think I’ll call him in now.” Stede makes for the door with a menacing laugh, but Ed grabs an arm and pulls him back.

“Don’t bring him into this, Stede! Now, this is very complicated.”

Stede takes a deep breath and stands straight, looking like he’s going to explode into laughter at any second.

“The first thing you do is, you take your left arm, and you hold it straight out front like this.” Ed demonstrates.

Stede’s eyebrows furrow and he plops his left arm out in mid-air, hand drooping lazily at the end of it.

“No Stede, you gotta put it out there like you fuckin’ mean it."

Stede nods and narrows his eyes, and this time thrusts his left arm straight forward and hits it mid-air as if it’s the most serious thing he’s done in his life.

“Fuck yeah, that’s great. Now you leave the arm out, and to the same thing with the other one, like this.”

With all seriousness the situation is due, Ed and Stede are now facing each other, arms straight out at one another. Stede’s face cracks and he smiles, wiggling his fingers.

“Ok, ok, you don’t do that. You flip your hands over one at a time like this, see?”

Stede does so, torso shaking with suppressed laughter.

“Ok that’s the first bit. Now… you put your left hand on your right shoulder… no, leave the other arm up, you keep the arm you aren’t moving still or it doesn’t look right. Then your right hand on your left shoulder. Look serious, mate, this is a serious dance!” Ed is shaking with laughter now, too. “We aren’t even halfway done yet!”

“I’d hope not, or I’d wonder if this was a dance at all! Are you sure you aren’t making this up?”

“No, Stede, I’m not, this is real shit. Take it from the top.”

They do the first three moves over again and finish with their hands on their own shoulders.

“Good job. Ok, so now you put your left hand behind your head, and then your right hand…”

“I like this bit, I can see your tummy.”

“And then you move your left hand and then your right over your stomach, see?”

“Aww, you covered it.” Stede frowns in disappointment. “I miss your belly button already.”

“Focus Stede, this is the dance of my people.”

“I said the same about the Jive but we all know how that little lesson ended!”

“We won’t have to replace the table after this one, I promise, now get your left hand on your hip, or it’s your ass!”

“Is it my hip or my ass?”

“Hip! Left arm to left hip, right arm to right hip!”

“Fine!” Stede indeed has his hands on his hips now, eyes glaring at Ed but mouth still twitching into a smile at the corners.

“Good.” Ed takes a couple of breaths. “Good. That’s mostly it. Once your hands are on your hips you just do a… little jump! To the left.” He demonstrates. Stede copies him, and how they’re facing away from each other.

“Okay, now what? I can’t see you anymore, Ed.”

“Now you do the same moves again, same order. Keep hopping to the left after you get your hands on your hips. See?”

Stede turns around to watch Ed demonstrate the entirety of the dance.

“You look… quite fearsome,” he whispers.

“You think so?”

“Absolutely, I do.”

Ed turns around to look at Stede, who isn’t smiling. He’s staring Ed straight in the eyes.

Ed brushes back his hair with his hand, trying to look smooth. “Think it would look scary during a raid?”

Stede breaks again, entire body shaking as the smile spreads on his face again. Ed knows he should pretend to be upset, but god he loves that smile, he loves it more than he loves breathing, or pooping.

“Maybe we’ll have to try it. Together.” Stede takes a step back, bumping up against the table. He pushes himself up onto the edge, giving Ed a wink. The dance pretense is over.

Ed walks up to where Stede is sitting and pulls him into a greedy kiss, feeling Stede wrap his legs around Ed’s waist. He starts giggling through the kisses as Ed feels Stede’s arms out straight, then crossed against his back, then behind his head, then joining his knees around Ed’s middle.

“You fuckin’ stop it,” Ed gasps between breaths.

“It’s not my… fault I’m… such a good… fucking student…” Stede mumbles between kisses before burying his head in Ed’s neck.

“The best at fucking at least.” Ed grabs Stede’s legs and lifts him off the table, carting him towards the bed, knowing it is another move he’ll regret in the morning.

He lays Stede down on his back and straddles between his legs, hair falling in Stede’s face. Stede draws a line down Ed’s chest with his finger.

“Do you think…?” Ed waits for Stede to tell him what he thinks, about what Stede wants from him, what will get Stede off tonight, how Stede can please him in return.

“Yeah, love?”

“Think we can get Izzy in here to demonstrate the dance?”

“Ugh, Stede!” Ed huffs and gets off of him, standing up.

Stede groans. “Aw, Ed, I was just teasing.”

Ed turns around and gives Stede a menacing smile.

“And just for that, I know what punishment you’re getting.” He makes for the cabin door.

“Ed, what is it?”

Ed throws it open and yells. “Izzy! Israel Hands, you’re needed here right now for a fucking demonstration!”

“Ed, no!” Stede gasps. “Are you serious? Is this real right now?”

Ed leans against the wall with a cocky grin.

“You’re about to find out, my love.”

And they both fall into peals of laughter as they hear the loud, plodding bootsteps of their first mate descending angrily towards them.

[phantom-ellie]

Black Pandather: WaPandas Forever

Challenge: Slowvember 2022 Prompt: Pandas Modern AU: The Art of (Smashing) Crockery by me.

"Which one are you?"

"I'll be that one."

"That one? The other one is cooler."

"Which is which?"

"Fuck if I know mate, I don't mean to sound racist but they all look the same to me." Ed squints into the panda habitat. "Seriously, they could be clones. Clone pandas."

"Ed! Shush! They'll hear you!"

"They don't speak English, mate. If anything, they speak Japanese."

Stede huffs and holds up his phone to take pictures of Ri Ri and Shin Shin... or is it Shin Shin and Ri Ri? Ed has a point. They may be the most popular attraction at the Ueno zoo in Tokyo, but there is still a dearth of labels around to give tourists more info.

Stede nudges Ed with his shoulder and smiles. "I never thought I'd get to see a panda in real life. This is amazing!"

"You think everything in Japan is amazing." Ed chuckles.

"And you don't? Ed, there's actual vegetation here, the foliage is insane! And the flowers! And people actually pick up trash! And the food!"

"Yeah Stede, I noticed you liked the food. I thought the chef at the restaurant was going to clobber you if you said 'oishii desu' one more fuckin' time."

"It's a compliment! It's the only thing I know how to say." Stede pouts, but it isn't a real pout, just one of those fake ones he does because he knows Ed finds it cute.

Ed puts his hands in his pockets. "It's too bad pandas are so bad at having babies. Would be nice to see some baby pandas out and about."

Stede squints at Ed. "Why can't they have babies?"

"I dunno, something about shrinking habitat, the pandas just don't do it with each other. Probably because they look alike, who wants to fuck someone who looks just like you? Narcissists, I bet. I bet pandas aren't narcissists."

Stede crouches down with determination and calls into the habitat.

"Hey, you two! Why don't you get to know each other? Oi! Hey! Hey panda!"

Ed covers his face with his arm, giggling.

"Go and have a chat to that guy! Hey you two... get hot and heavy tonight! See what happens. See what goes down."

"Stop, mate, you're gonna get us kicked out," Ed laughs, pulling Stede into a standing position.

Stede shrugs. "It was worth a shot? I don't seem to have problems getting laid lately, thought they could use some encouragement."

Ed pulls Stede in for a side-hug. His stomach growls.

"Well, this is great and all, but I think I need to get some lunch before the hanger sets in." He looks around for a food stand. Stede tugs on his arm gently.

"Hey, Ed?"

"Yeah, love?"

"Is there another way to say 'delicious' in Japanese?"

"I don't fuckin' know, do I look like I speak-" he jumps as Stede gooses the fuck out of him in public.

"Stede, what was that for-"

"Oishii desu," Stede replies, flinging his sweater over his shoulder and marching off to embarrass Ed in some other way in the near future.

[phantom-ellie]

The Lovers, the Dreamers, and Swede

Swede (it’s like suede) Jensen was a roamer. He had no permanent residence. He’d dropped out of school at 16 and spent the next 30 years working whatever menial job suited him at the moment. He had been a roadie for both a stadium country singer and a progressive metal band. He’d worked for county fairs and other events, directing parking and lazily chasing tumbleweeds of escaped cotton candy. He had a stint in a convenience store, for a week or so, but it hadn’t been for him. Most jobs hadn’t been for him. He didn’t want anything beneath his feet that wasn’t natural, wasn’t earth or grass or water or stone. He believed that grounding solved most problems. He believed it because it was true.

Swede Jensen was a second-generation stoner. He was born in the early summer of 1970, just one year off from ‘69, and he didn’t need his incomplete education to know that he was likely conceived along to the live sounds of Sly & The Family Stone, because his parents reminded him every year on his birthday. When his mother was giving birth to him, she passed her blunt to his father so she could push. Swede’s father took a big drag and hummed along to Blue Suede Shoes as the baby entered the world, and both mother and father knew what to call their tiny, shriveled, raisin of a boy. Suede. Mom and dad had less than a 6th grade education. They didn’t see much use for reading or writing, didn’t know numbers beyond what they needed to exchange cash for their next fix. So Swede Anthony Jensen went on the birth certificate, leading to a lifetime of corrections and (only mild) resentment. When Swede started his foray into the world wide web his chosen internet handle was BlueSwedeShoes70 (his stoner friends asked why he didn’t choose the number 420, but Swede wasn’t about to glorify that asshole Adolph’s birthday).

Swede Jensen was a natural-born follower. He never led anything or anyone, not if he could help it. He liked being told what to do. He liked having a place in the world, even if that position was constantly changing. He liked not having to be responsible. The world was not on his shoulders. He was at peace. He was patient, he was loyal. He didn’t follow on a whim, wouldn’t follow just anyone, but he understood that there were people more important than him out there. They were smarter, kinder, more charismatic, more able (though perhaps, none of them were wiser). Swede just wanted to play a small role in someone else’s life.

Swede Jensen was a listener. Whenever he spoke, things came out wrong. They sounded great in his head. He thought he had a unique perspective on the world. But when he tried to share it, he sounded stupid. People talked over him, gave him funny looks, or ignored him. And while this hurt him when he was younger, he gradually accepted that some people were meant to produce and others were meant to absorb. Swede was absorbent. He listened to everything, remembered everything, and said little. Everyone told Swede their secrets, their deepest feelings, their biggest life dramas that they didn’t want other (more important) people to know about. Swede was quiet, unassuming, and frequently stoned, and everyone around him knew that he was safe, would never tell. And that was Swede’s most precious thing, the knowledge that he was allowed and trusted with others’ hearts. It gave him a purpose. He could be the world’s repository of feelings and dreams. He could keep his own for himself.

Swede Jensen was a background character in everyone else’s life. He was the last to be invited, the first to be accidentally left out. If each day had a running script, he had the fewest lines. He wasn’t important enough for a love interest, or even a best friend. And by the age of 46, he had long accepted that.

Swede Jensen was an interdimensional traveler. That may have been the pot speaking, of course, but Swede felt like he was in many places at once, in so many stories, and he was the only thing that stayed the same. The only constant in the entire universe. And that’s why Swede allowed himself this background place in the world. He knew that if you added up all of the experiences one could have in each story, it would amount to the best story of them all.

Swede Jensen believed in deep ecology. While he knew that was technically an academic term, for him deep ecology meant more than a balance between man and nature, a belief in the evils of consumerism, or the promotion of biodiversity. To Swede it was deep because the earth made him feel deep, grounded, as if his body were a tree with roots running down into the rock-hard California soil for miles upon miles. There was no feeling like that on concrete or carpet. It was only surrounded by trees that he could breathe deeply, feel deeply, dream deeply.

Swede Jensen was with his friends, his found family, what upper-middle-class white women his age would call his tribe (and have it written in a cutesy font with culturally appropriative decorative symbols on their refillable coffee tumblers that they probably purchased on Etsy). They presently occupied a campground in King’s Canyon National Forest, the base of giant sequoia trees just a short walk away. Swede had chosen the campsite closest to a tree with an odd-shaped root sticking out of it. The root was in the shape of a beaver, if you squinted, or had a little bit of something in your system to stimulate the imagination. The little wooden animal was Swede’s friend. He had camped here many times over the last couple of decades.

Swede Jensen was not educated, not skilled, not a valued member of society, not noticed, and certainly not an eco-terrorist. But, well, he was open to the possibilities. With the right leader, the right amount of peer pressure, the right amount of cannabis flowing through his system, the right amount of inhibitions lowered… It hadn’t happened yet, but it could.

Swede Jensen was smoking a blunt when the RV arrived steered by someone new to carry him and his family of outcasts on the waves of a new adventure.

Swede Jensen was ready for it. He was ready for anything.

[phantom-ellie]

I haven’t tried to draw anything in probably 25 years. I’ve never done fanart. I’ve decided to learn to draw and this is the first art I have made since elementary school. It’s stupid fucking Stede Bonnet as a stupid fucking snail. It is terrible, but also way better than I thought I could do. I’m going to keep uploading my attempts at drawing/art here in hopes that one day I can see actual progression in my abilities.

[phantom-ellie]

Day 2 of trying to learn to draw. Decided on Stede’s whore shirt from Piña Coladas.

[phantom-ellie]

Day 3 of learning to draw, tried to sketch my PFP

[phantom-ellie]

Our Flag Means Leaving the Islands Alone!

I did this a few weeks ago when everyone on Twitter was making stupid bullshit after someone complained that we weren’t taking fanfiction seriously enough. I used @arcadian-asgardian’s Animal Crossing Stede Bonnet for his bits. This is dumb and only gets dumber with time.

I would apologize for this but I am not sorry.