#peter pan rulz

[hastyslug21]

Demon Boy of Neverland Pt.2 (Humor, Smut)

Description: Peter is going to visit you in your new home, The Cage.

Demon Boy of Neverland: Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

"Oh gods!" Y/N grumbled out as she shielded her eyes from the blinding sunlight once more.

A day had passed since Peter Pan had left her trapped, leaving only a cup of water and a bowl of fruit outside of her cage to tide her over through the day.

On her first night in Neverland, Y/N couldn't sleep well; the faraway screeches resounding throughout the jungles surrounding her and the sinister-ness of the night as the full moon glowed brightly in the skies terrified her more than anything she had ever encountered back in the Enchanted Forest.

"Aw, bollocks," Y/N said with a wince as her head and back ached dully.

She looked outside of her cage to see if there were any creeps lurking nearby, and once she found that she was all alone, she started talking to herself.

Of course she wasn't going mad....or anything.

"Damnable Pan. Couldn't have trapped me in a dungeon or a cave. At least there are roofs," she straightened her back with even more audible cracks in her joints. "And proper floors, but noooo. Insufferable swine."

Y/N cracked her neck from side to side as she said," Can't believe I followed that green flat ass of his to Neverland."

At the thought of being trapped against her own will, rage welled up inside of her.

She took it out on her cage and regretted it instantly.

"Blast!," she said, cradling her bruised hand to her bosom.

She next tried kicking at the bars. She tried again and again and again until frustration frothed to the brim like a volcano ready to erupt and wreak havoc to whatever is nearby and so Y/N exploded into a frenzy of kicks and punches against a cage that remained intact despite giving her best blows.

Then, all of a sudden, Y/N froze. She lost all control over her limbs and so she was forced to stare ahead of her, only to see the approach of the demon boy of Neverland.

"Well, well, well. Good morning. Had fun last night? The wailings and screeches of suffering little flamingos and mermaids may put you off at first, but don't worry. Soon, after a century or two in your cage, they'll just be music to your ears, lulling you to sleep and to lovely dreams," Peter greeted Y/N, with a malicious smirk that sent an ice-cold dagger spearing through her heart.

She attempted to make a scowl, but only succeeded in letting in a murderous look glint in her eyes.

Upon seeing her bloodied knuckles and murderous glare, Peter let loose a full blooming of an amused smile upon his damnably radiant face.

"Now, now darling. Look what you've gone and done to your new, shiny cage," Pan gestured towards the blood stains on the cage walls.

He shook his head and exhaled a sigh of disappointment.

"Naughty, little creature. I thought you'd have learned your lesson yesterday and behave, like a good pet ought to. I suppose I shouldn't have expected much."

Peter reached out a hand between the bars of the cage to lightly carress Y/N's jawline; so soft and so sweet were his strokes that Y/N nearly sighed out in pleasure if it weren't for her being paralyzed.

"A wild creature like you needs to be disciplined. Now, how shall I discipline you?," Peter said with a slow drawl that sent a disgustingly hot thrill of excitement throughout Y/N; a thrill that meant how much it sucks to be a hormone-filled adolescent.

Y/N grunted to herself in self-loathing.

'Blast that damnably bone-melting accent to hell and back. Digesting the sight of that damnably green, good-looking demon makes me want to puke. He even dresses up like a Broccoli, a Broccoli that wants to make me it's pet. Oh gods save me from this Broccoli!'

"What was that? I would love to hear for your suggestions on making yourself a good, obedient pet," Pan said, flicking a quick gesture of his hand that allowed Y/N to collapse onto the floor of her cage in relief.

A pause and a moment later, Y/N composed herself as she looked up at Peter's towering figure.

"Muttons are the way of life," Y/N cryptically said with an even more cryptical look in her narrowed eyes, raising a finger to point up at Pan.

"....What?"

"Muttons are the way of life."

"Muttons...are the way ....of life?," Pan carefully repeated, in a flabbergasted tone, with a raised brow and a tilt of the head.

"Yes, demon boy. Now let me out! I, Y/N, am nobody's pet. Let me return to my village of Engleheim. I will never, ever grovel to you for treats or beg for scraps of leftovers from the likes of you," Y/N said, imbuing her last words with as much disgust and slowly crawled backwards away from Peter.

The corner of his lips twitched upwards. He let forth a chuckle that eventually morphed into peals of laughter.

This fit lasted for dozens of seconds, during which time Y/N was crossing her arms, tapping her fingers impatiently and furrowing her brows grumpily.

When his laughing fit ended, Peter inhaled deeply and exhaled out.

"You're much more amusing than I thought you'd be. Oh, well, I'm glad I didn't feed you to the mermaids earlier. I told Felix that I would sacrifice you to them today."

"You bastard!," Y/N yelled angrily, lunging forward to grab ahold of his green garments to forcefully pull him to her, the cage walls acting as a barrier between them.

"Throw me to the mermaids! It's a much more pleasant fate than being trapped here for your pleasure!" Y/N bit out angrily, clenching tightly onto his shirt.

Before Y/N could properly realize it, Pan broke out of her hold, opened the cage and entered. He slammed Y/N down onto the floor of the cage. He pinned both of her wrists down and he straddled her waist, Y/N writhing and squirming beneath him.

Her bosom was heaving with the effort of breaking free. Pan's eyes lingered hotly onto her rising breasts for a time.

Seeing her struggle so futilely yet in such seductive way beneath Peter made him revel in the delicious feeling of making her feel weak.

"Now... being trapped here, beneath me. Is that so bad a fate?" Peter said in a low voice.

His face loomed closer and closer to Y/N's face. Her heart started racing fast; the blood in her veins was rushing hotly and every fiber of her being was fluttering at the closeness of Peter. Heat was starting to throb between her legs.

Peter's red, round lips hovered above Y/N's own plump, pink lips. He hotly pressed his lips onto her own. He grinded his hips onto her own hard so that Y/N gasped, opening her mouth for Peter to plunge in his tongue. His tongue lavished her tongue with lazy sweeps that had Y/N moaning softly.

Y/N tried tugging her wrists free, but Pan broke free of the kiss and grounded harder onto her until she groaned.

"Naughty," Pan whispered into her ear, pinning both of her wrists in one hand.

He moved his other hand and trailed a finger on the side of her breast and over her abdomen until he reached the most heated part of her body that was aching. He cupped her there roughly and she arched her back. He removed his hand and Y/N rolled her hips against the bulge that straddled tightly around her.

Groaning, Peter felt himself hardening and felt heat that instantly made wearing trousers uncomfortable.

"Let's see just how wet you are for me, shall we?," Peter crooned seductively to Y/N, who was writhing restlessly beneath him.

"Oh...please," Y/N moaned aloud.

Peter felt his pupils dilating. He lifted the dirty hem of Y/N's night gown and slowly slid his warm palm up her thigh. In response to that, she spread her legs apart.

Resisting entering her with his hot and throbbing cock, Peter stroked his fingers between the thick, satiny folds of her vulva.

Y/N bucked her hips forward but felt no satisfying thrust.

"Please, in the name of all that is muttony. Please," Y/N breathily moaned.

Unable to resist anymore, Peter removed all of his clothes and revealed the bulge that had Y/N nearly crying for.

He positioned himself between her legs.

"Remove your own clothes, my pet," Peter commanded.

Y/N hastily removed her nightgown but she still had her corset on when Peter ripped off her undergarments and thrusted deep into her with a groan. Y/N felt pain followed by warm pleasure from the hot, throbbing cock moving into her.

Peter held onto both of Y/N's buttocks when he thrusted into her again. Y/N held onto Peter's shoulders tightly as she grounded into him. Unexpectedly, Peter pulled her hair back and pinned her roughly to the floor.

"Bad," Peter hoarsely reprimanded her. He snapped his fingers and her breasts were exposed.

He still held her down by the shoulders when he rode her; he rode into her with painfully hot and satisfying thrusts, with a speed Y/N couldn't match with.

Suddenly he exited her, unfinished.

"I'm-I'm-I'm not finished... Oh, gods," Y/N whimpered out, a glaze of tears in her eyes as she looked up pleadingly at Pan.

"Me neither."

He disappeared and reappeared outside of the cage, fully clothed. Pan locked the cage shut and he snapped his fingers.

Y/N found her wrists tied to one end of the cage. Her body was fully clothed and she was stretched out on the floor in a provocative way and her ankles were tied apart from the other.

"Thank you for your suggestion, mutton pie," Pan said, his red lips curled into a cruel smile. " Leaving you like this would surely teach you a lesson in behaving properly."

"You evil Broccoli," Y/N grounded out bitterly.

Peter was confused for a moment at the word 'Broccoli', but he waved it off as he looked upon her with one last roving glimpse of her body that nearly had him burning to enter her and finish what he started.

"When I come back and I find that you are well behaved, well, maybe then I'll give you your reward, mutton cakes," Pan said, disappearing with a gloating laugh in a cloud of smoke.

Y/N tried rubbing her thighs together to ease her sexual frustration, but to no avail. Her heart swelled within her and her v part was still aching torturously.

Clenching her fists tightly together, she swore aloud: "I will make you pay, demon boy. Just you wait."

TO BE CONTINUUUED

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

A/N: The village of Engleheim is just a village name I made up to suit the story.

P.S: I'm thinking of making this a five or more part story rather than three.

P.P.S: I was not planning on writing smut...at all

P.P.P.S: okay maybe I was but not so soon

P.P.P.P.S: Felix is in the next part.

[hastyslug21]

Demon Boy of Neverland Pt.4 (Humor)

Description: Felix is going to be your caretaker. He's going to serve you broccoli for dinner and keep you company to help stop you from talking to bugs.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. I am just writing fanfiction to soothe my soul.

Demon Boy of Neverland: Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Night had befallen Neverland. The waves on the coasts of the island calmly lapped at the broad shores, mermaids were quietly sighing to themselves as they gazed longingly at the full moon and the screeches of flamingos lowered down as they ruffled their feathers and comfortably settled their fluffy, pink butts into their warm nests for the day's rest----

"Oh gods, I'M DYYYIINNG!," Y/N bemoaned, rather too loudly.

So loud, in fact, that a nearby flamingo pooped out an egg with a fearful squawk.

Y/N had her face tightly pressed against the cage walls. The chill of the night was starting to creep in upon her; her thin nightgown not doing much against the slight yet cool breezes wafting in and out of her cage. Tears started leaking from of her eyes.

"I'm cold, hungry, and parched. In addition to that, my reputation as an honest, pure and chaste lass had been ruined the moment," Y/N took out a handkerchief and blew snot clean out of her nose, sniffling, "--the moment my virginity was soiled, although not completely, by an Evil Spawn who kidnapped and locked me in a cage for something as petty as making him lose his spot in a line. I mean, how inconceivably idiotic is that?"

Y/N shifted her head slightly to bestow her undivided attention upon the innocent little bug that was burrowing into the dirt.

She nodded her head as she proceeded on conversationally, "I agree. He is inconceivably idiotic. It's just a spot in a line. Demon boy doesn't seem the kind of chap who would wait in line for anyone. If he were, then I did him a favor. Not like he could stand still for a second with that pitchfork wedged in so tight between those flat butt cheeks."

"Actually, he waited two hours to see the Oracle. And, I can assure you that his butt isn't as flat as your own," a voice haughtily proclaimed out-of-the-blue.

Startled, Y/N abruptly sat up straight, the cage bars leaving a deep imprint on her cheek. A tall silhouette emerged from the dense jungle foliage and approached her, a torch crackling and burning brightly in one of the silhouette's hand and a bowl of food held in the other.

"A-As flat as my own?"

"Yes."

Y/N turned to look at her butt and pinched it. She whipped her head back around and glared as murderously at him as she did to Pan.

"Pervert! Peeping in on me while I'm trapped and caged in here like an animal! Didn't anyone teach you to keep your eyes up here?," Y/N wildly gesticulated to her face.

"I don't need to be taught. I'll keep my eyes up here--," he pointed to his grey eyes while still holding the bowl of food, a mischievous smile growing on his face, "--when there's not much to see down there."

Felix crouched to eye level with Y/N and maintained eye contact with her while he planted the torch deep into the ground at a safe distance. A few moments later, Y/N gasped aloud in an offended manner, clutching at her chest as though she were truly hurt.

"You prick! Who in the muttons of hell do you think you are?"

"Someone who is here to take care of you."

"What? To take care of me?"

"Yes," Felix affirmed, removing the strap of the leather flask that was on his person and handed it over to Y/N. "Milor--I mean, Pan, thought it would be best if I kept you company. He wanted to show you the true extent of Neverland's hospitality."

"Ha!" Y/N laughed out contemptuously, uncorking the leather flask and taking a swig of water.

"Is it that difficult to believe?"

"Hmmm. Well, sweetheart, he kidnapped me, took advantage of me and deflowered me. Deflowered. This morning, no less! My answer: Obviously, you dummy!"

Felix, confused due to not knowing what the word 'deflower' means, retaliated by saying, "Better a dummy than being a loon. Your second night in Neverland and you're already having a heartfelt chat...with a bug."

"Hey! You leave Barney out of this!"

Felix, upon realizing that the more he opened his mouth and spewed out whatever comes to mind, the more he fails at gaining trust from Y/N. He felt terrible at the thought of letting Pan down.

Feigning a remorseful look, he said in an equally remorseful tone, "Oh, look, I realize we got off on the wrong foot here. I-I'm sorry for snapping at you. And I apologize for my rude behavior. I really am. It's just that I'm--I'm not used to talking to girls. And I'm not as sociable as I ought to be and I always say the wrong things.... I know we just met and I know you won't forgive a stranger who made fun of you, but I feel awful for making terrible first impressions with you. It's understandable if you hate me."

Y/N always was a sucker for heartfelt apologies from repentful boys and upon seeing his downcast eyes and remorseful expression, coupled along with the scar that ran from between his eyebrows to across his right cheekbone, she felt a pull at her heartstrings, prompting her to say, "Aww, sweetie, I-I don't hate you! I hate that demonic Evil Spawn, but not you! Was--was he the one who did that to you?"

Y/N was pointing to his scar. She felt a cold shiver run through her as she witnessed the change in Felix's face from a heartbreaking expression to an intense and passionate look.

"No, he didn't. He's not the demon you think he is. He brought you here for the same reason that he brought all of us here: to a place where we matter. Look, he even gave you your favorite food," Felix fiercely defended, placing the bowl of food before Y/N.

Y/N was taking a swig of water at the same moment that she saw what her dinner is. At the sight of it, she accidentally spat water all over Felix's face.

Felix, shocked from the unexpected spit take, slowly wiped off the spit with one swipe. One corner of his eye was twitching. Y/N, fully processing what she really did, turned to face Felix.

"Oh, I'm sorry! Please, forgive me. Here, I'll wipe your face--," Y/N pulled out a clean handkerchief and held his chin as she wiped the spit off of his face. She had done so with a touch of tenderness; caressing the side of his face so gently that Felix couldn't help this feeling of warmth spreading within his chest.

"It's--It's alright," he stuttered out, pulling his face from her grasp, heat blooming in his cheeks. He noted the fact that his heart pumped faster within his chest and wished he hadn't noticed that.

Felix nudged the bowl of broccoli toward Y/N and continued to say, "If you want to survive to get back to your village, you're going to have to eat them. Plus, it's healthy."

"Is he going to let me go?," Y/N hopefully asked, grabbing ahold of the bars of the cage wall and pressed her face against it.

"That's for him to decide."

"That bastard! What does he want from me? Being dragged from Engleheim is punishment enough! What use am I to him?" Y/N exclaimed aloud incredulously. For but a moment, she let her forehead touch the bars of the cage, her face downwards, concealing the full extent of her vulnerability as she said wishfully, more to herself than to anyone listening, "I want to go home."

"Are you....Are you loved there?," Felix inquired tentatively.

"No." Y/N then deliberated a few moments to herself. She spoke so softly, that Felix had to lean forward and was just in time to hear her words; her voice strained as though forced through a clogged throat, "The only person who loved me is dead."

Felix, upon seeing her brooding mood and realizing a shift in atmosphere, felt uncomfortable at such display of vulnerability.

Wanting to alleviate his feeling of awkwardness, Felix asked, "What's your name?"

Y/N looked up. "Pan didn't tell you? I've been here barely a week and already it sounds typical of him. If a nameless clandestine object is all that he sees of me then a nameless clandestine object I'll be for everyone else." Her announcement was spoken resentfully. She turned away from Felix with a humph.

Thinking of the striking similarity between a caged wild creature and her, Felix coaxed to her in a gentle tone, "I'm not Pan. You needn't be a nameless clandestine object to me."

Reluctantly, she turned back round and proffered her hand as she said, "Y/N."

"Felix," He returned, taking up her hand and giving it a firm shake.

"We really should have met under different circumstances," Y/N stated, all serious. Their hands fell away. Felix's gaze flickered to her hand and back to his.

A few moments later, Y/N realized with a jolt in her heart at how close Felix really is to her. He peered into her eyes and flickered his gaze now and again to assess her whole alluring countenance.

"What is it?," Y/N timidly inquired, not meaning for her voice to come out so breathlessly. Felix's scar may have made Y/N pity him a little bit, but it also made him attractive to her, oddly enough. What furthered his attractiveness even more were his eyes; smokey grey orbs that softly gazed at her, greeting her so warmly and yet it mystified her all the same. Quite the opposite from a pair of bewitching emerald eyes.

"I just don't see what's so attractive about you," Felix finally voiced aloud.

Stunned, Y/N unhinged her jaw and bulged out her eyes at his bluntness. Recovering from her injury, Y/N clamped her teeth tightly together and narrowed her eyes.

"Felix, do you remember what you said earlier to me?"

"...About what?"

Y/N threw her snot-riddled handkerchief to his face. Felix, taming down the urge to torch Y/N's cage, sighed aloud and peeled the germ-infested handkerchief from his face, disgust curling his lips.

"What. Was. That. For?"

"Sweetie, you always say the wrong thing," Y/N gravely stated. She picked up her bowl of broccoli and picked up one miniature tree and cheerily said in a reassuring tone, "But don't worry. Since you're my caretaker, I ought to pay you back by giving you lessons on how to say the right things."

And so Y/N lectured away to Felix, who was still squatting on the forest floor, wondering how can such a girl be interesting to someone as Peter Pan when she was just downright...weird.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Pan was sitting on a log, carving at a stick with a dirk, shaving sliver after sliver automatically, his mind drifting off in a daze. The brushing of leaves behind him snapped him out of his daze, pausing mid-slice.

"How did it go with Y/N?," Pan questioned without turning to face Felix.

Felix walked up to Pan's side and watched as Pan resumed slicing at the stick.

"I thought that you were watching."

"I was. But, I just felt the need to meditate."

"...Is something the matter?"

"No, nothing," Pan waved him off. "Tis nothing, Felix."

Felix, concerned about Pan, seated himself beside him.

"Y/N can never trust me knowing that I've been sent by you. So what shall I do next, Milord?"

"You've seen how she is. She's gullible. I can tell she trusts too easily. Be her caretaker for a few days, play nice and all fair. Just show her that you are harmless and then...."

"Then what?"

Peter slowly grinned and turned to face Felix.

"Then I can have some fun."

Felix nodded. Pan turned back to slicing, but there was one thing niggling in the back of Felix's mind that he just can't comprehend.

"Uhhm, Milord?"

"(sighs) Yes, Felix?"

"....What does deflower mean?"

(TO BE CONTINUUUEED)

[hastyslug21]

Demon Boy of Neverland Pt. 3 (Humor)

Description: Peter has a one night stand with a mermaid and is giving Felix his iconic wooden club. But fret not, Peter didn't forget about you; he's got Ketchup for you to eat with your bamboo cage.

A/N: HEAVILY EDITED. Demon Boy of Neverland: Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

"Leaving so soon?," a sultry voice crooned, mocking a sad tone.

"Of course. Otherwise, I would reek of fish," Peter said, with a sneer. He slipped into his trousers and his cuffs onto his wrists.

He looked around for his other accoutrements and chanced a glance back at the woman whose warm brown skin contrasted beautifully with the pale cream sands that she was laying on, her jet black hair splayed about haphazardly.

She then sat up with Peter's shirt pressed against her bare bosom and his belt wrapped around her slim waist.

"You may obviously be the ruler of this land, but that doesn't mean you can act all high and mighty with women who predates your existence," the mermaid said in a pouty manner.

Pan approached the mermaid and grabbed at his belt around her waist and pulled her towards him. Her golden eyes widened in surprise.

He lightly caught her chin with his forefinger and thumb, and said in a whisper:

"Well, aren't you cute when you're all ruffled."

He unbuckled his belt from around her sternum and placed it onto his person.

"I'll be taking this, too," Pan announced, harshly grabbing her wrist and slipped her bracelet off.

In a cloud of poof, the mermaid found herself on the rough sands of the cove, her mermaid tail flopping about briefly.

Before Pan can leave, he was held back by the mermaid's hold on his arm.

"You'll come to me for anything, won't you?," the mermaid inquired innocently, seductively biting on her lower lips.

"Anything? Well, aren't you a confident little guppie," Pan remarked aloud with a raised brow and a bemused smile. He shook his arm free of her hold and took a few steps backward.

Smirking, Pan maintained eye contact with the mermaid's golden orbs as he said, "I like that." Then he poofed on out of the cove, leaving the mermaid smiling gleefully.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Several hours had passed when Y/N's bonds were loosened, as if by magic.

"Tis that bastard's doing," Y/N muttered to herself.

The long hours and minutes Y/N endured felt like an eternity to her; being tied up while left all hot and bothered made it so.

The tender spot between her thighs was still throbbing dully. Y/N slid her hands slowly down her thigh towards her heated spot, still slick and hot with need, but stopped herself.

"That evil Broccoli," Y/N angrily exclaimed through gritted teeth, clenching her fist.

'Of course he would want me to do that. Well I won't give that bastard the satisfaction of watching me pleasure myself,' Y/N thought to herself.

Ignoring her pulsing core, she held onto the bars of her cage as she looked about her surroundings, combing every inch of foliage before her with her intense gaze.

"GREEN DEVIIILLL!! I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE, YOU PERVERTED, COWARDLY BASTARD!," Y/N shouted out.

She grabbed a rock from the sides of her cage walls and threw it into some nearby foliage. Anger bled from her heart and into her bloodstream, rushing hotly in her veins until Y/N was absolutely boiling at the thought of being trapped, ignored, toyed with and---

Gr-Grumble Grumble Rawr

--And neglected, apparently.

Y/N patted her belly, saying soothingly to it, "Don't worry. If we die of starvation, at least there'll be a mutton heaven waiting for us in the afterlife."

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Peter stifled his laughter as he watched Y/N gnaw on the bars of her cage in the distance.

"I thought you were going to feed her to the mermaids," a voice said behind him.

Peter jumped in surprise and whipped his head around to face his most loyal stalker-- I mean Lost Boy.

"Felix," Pan said reproachfully. "Don't you knock? It's quite rude to approach someone from behind and not knock."

"We're outside," Felix deadpanned with an equally deadpanful face.

"Well, another new thing you should know on Neverland, 'knock before you enter Pan's space boundaries,'" Pan said in a 'duh' tone.

"I'm sorry, Milord," Felix said, bowing his head down.

"As much as I love that title, I told you to call me 'Pan'. How am I going to get the heart of the Truest Believer from that boy if you keep calling me 'Milord'?"

"He's not even here, Milo---Sire."

Pan gave a pause. He stroked his beardless chin in contemplation.

"I suppose you could keep calling me that for awhile."

"Anything to appease Milord's ego," Felix said with a sweeping bow from the waist.

Pan was right chuffed at that.

Gesturing with his head to Y/N, Felix asked, "What will you do to her, Milord?"

Pan didn't immediately respond. He and Felix only stood there and watched Y/N chew at the bars of her cage.

"Maybe I'll give her some fish sauce that's well-liked in a land my Shadow took me to before."

"What fish sauce?"

"Ketchup," Pan cheerily announced.

A jar full of some kind of red substance poofed into Peter's hand.

"It'll help her to gulp down that awful taste of imprisonment," Peter casually said as he scooped up ketchup with a finger. Peter tentatively licked some ketchup off of his finger.

"Mm. Not bad."

"Surely you're joking, Milord?"

"Of course not. Here, try some."

Peter offered a ketchup-lathered finger to Felix, whose eye twitched in shock and one corner of his lips curled up in disgust.

"Come on, it's not like I've got diseases or anything. Don't be such a Rumple," Pan said, taking a step forward.

Felix took two steps back away.

"Rumple? Your son? What does he have to do with me?"

Pan sighed in disappointment and wiped his ketchup-lathered finger onto Felix's clothes. Felix stared at his ketchup stained garments in revulsion.

"I meant don't be such a coward."

"Oh... Did you visit him on your recent trip to the Enchanted Forest?"

Peter scoffed and said, "I didn't even get the drawing of that boy from the Oracle."

"The boy with the heart of the Truest Believer?"

"Yes."

"Why not?"

"Her," Pan emphasized, pointing to Y/N. He continued in an apologetic tone, "I was bored waiting in line for the Oracle, so I played some flutes and Y/N came dancing in front of me from out of nowhere. She pushed me out of line and I couldn't get my spot back."

Pan closed his eyes and clenched his fist in anguish,"I wasted two hours of my life waiting in that damnable line."

Felix patted Peter's shoulder sympathetically.

"Soooo, as punishment, you're going to make Y/N chew her own cage to death with that ketchup sauce?"

Pan was sticking a finger into the jar for another taste, but stopped to turn to Felix, blinking.

Pan responded by bursting into a fit of laughter that lasted for dozens of seconds, clutching onto the jar tightly. He slowly recovered from his laughing fit.

"What in the blazes of hell is going on in that head of yours? I swear, Felix, the things you say at moments like these."

Peter threw the jar of ketchup behind him without a flinch at the loud shattering of glass.

"Then, what are you planning to do to her? This is the longest time since you've held a Lost Girl captive."

Peter parted a set of low-hanging branches with his hand, revealing another angle to view Y/N, saying in a low, dark voice: "She's no Lost Girl. She's my pet. All mine. A pretty little toy I'll play with until she breaks."

"The only reason I don't dispose of her now is because...."

Felix furrowed his brows as he asked, "Because what, Milord?"

"She's...intriguing."

"Intriguing?," Felix tentatively echoed Pan. He glanced at Y/N, who was laying face-down spread-eagled on the floor of the cage.

"Milord, isn't this little side activity distracting you from your real goal?"

"Distraction... Yes. A pretty, little distraction I'll keep by my side for a few years."

Feeling a jolt of shock, Felix exclaimed aloud, "Whatever for? You've got the Lost Boys, Baelfire and those damned gnats, Tinker Bell and Tiger Lily to worry about. Topping all of that, you need to find the heart of the Truest Believer. I mean, not that I'm commanding you or anything, but shouldn't you prioritise meeting with the Oracle first?"

"Don't forget to count yourself, Felix. You're quite a pain. And ever since I first took you on as part of the Lost Boys, you were rather clingy from the start. You still are."

Ignoring the supposed insult, Felix mulled over the matter awhile before his face lit up in understanding. "Oh, Milord, I think that you've caught the same thing that plagues almost everybody 30 to 40 years into their lives. When old men take up young female partners to feel young."

Felix took a few steps closer to Pan and shielded the side of his mouth with his hand as he whispered, "Mid-life crisis."

Pan took Felix's own hand and made the Lost Boy slap himself.

"That's it. I'm giving Tootles the battle axe you so wanted. From now on you're stuck with the wooden club."

"Wh-what? That twig of a weapon? No! I'll-I'll get splinters!"

"So? Deal with it. I had. You've been a thorn in my arse for decades after all."

Peter turned away from Felix at the same time the Lost Boy gaped open his mouth in shock, feeling as though a flamingo b*tch-slapped him across his face. Felix cupped his face gently even though he wasn't slapped in actuality.

'It's alright, Milord. It's alright. I've only been your most loyal Lost Boy for, oh, decades? You probably wouldn't even notice how much gray hair I've shed in service to you even after you die...Does he even die? If he does, would he want to be cremated or buried? What if he wants me to perform the eulogy in his honor? Oh gods, I wouldn't know what to say. I suppose I'll have to write it down... Sh*t, I can barely remember my ABCs, how am I suppose to write it? Ugh, what letter came first: Z? Or is it P? Sh*t---'

"Felix," Pan called authoritatively.

Felix straightened his back ram rod straight and held both of his arms behind his back.

"Yes, Milord?"

"I have a job for you," Peter informed, his lips curving into a sadistic smile as he looked at Y/N, who is now laying down, glumly throwing rocks outside of her cage.

Felix took one glance of Y/N and sighed aloud with a grimace.

'I don't get paid enough for this...Actually, I don't get paid at all. Oh gods, do I even have a retirement plan after all this?'

TO BE CONTINUUUEEDD...