#perefect male body

[theaestheticmodels]

[anomov]

Honestly??? I have nowhere else to post this, and I really just want to get it out, so here we go.

I feel so underrepresented in school. And it’s made worse by what the health teachers constantly say. I know that we’re kids in their eyes, but that doesn’t mean that they can just blow off our mental issues and what might be going on in personal life or mentally. They just blew over mental health and it really pissed me off.

But there are more things. I’ve only felt represented once in this school, and that was during the suicide prevention presentation. That’s not a good thing.

It starts off with the English teacher being all like “I’m ADHD so I have to have everything in order.” Bitch that’s not what ADHD is. And I think this specifically pisses me off more <i>as</i> someone with ADHD. I just hate misinformation being spread around, and her saying this isn’t going to help at all.

We’re already so misrepresented with the whole “ADHD means you’re bouncing off walls.” but now there’s this. It got on my nerves so much.

But that’s not what I’m the most livid about. What I’m the most livid about is the health class, specifically the male coach.

First off, he threw constant shade at the guys and made it seem like every guy was the same and that women don’t feel sexual desire. Some men are Ace, and some women are constantly horny. Everybody is different. Then he kept saying he understood, when he obviously didn’t because if he did he would know that everyone is different and not a clone of him or what the fuck ever he assumes every guy is like.

Though, what I’m even more mad about is his assumtions about all of our mental health.

Let me start out with, I’m not mentally healthy. I have depression and anxiety, and am constantly tired due to insomnia, in which meds do not help as much as they should.

He kept on acting like everyone was mentally fine. He gave examples but not good ones. His example of stress was saying we had a test. But then, he kept saying “You guys are like 15, you don’t have bad stress” or “You don’t have an excuse for being tired” or “You don’t have an excuse for sleeping less than 8 hours” or “You don’t need that caffine.”

Yes, I’m 15. I have anxiety. That causes more stress, then add on to that depression with constant suicidal thoughts, even if they’re not strong enough to harm me, it’s still there and causes stress.

Then onto the sleep thing. I’m sorry, but I can’t control what my body wants to do when it comes to sleep. I literally have no control over it other than taking meds and attempting to get my body to sleep. But even if I sleep 8 hours, I’m still tired.

You can’t say that I have no excuse when I try my best with multiple kinds of insomnia. And it’s always been like this, but it’s worse now, and you act like that can’t be there because we’re kids.

Some people do need caffine to function, even at this young. I know drinking coffee, caffinated tea, of an energy drink helps in the morning becuase I’m constantly tired. It’s not like everyone has a perefect sleep schedule and perfect control over their body. We don’t all sit up and play around, I try to sleep, but I can’t. I wake up so many times in the middle of the night, and then it’s hard to go back to sleep again. I have so many fucking excuses but apparently they’re not valid because I’m 15???

The only time I’ve felt represented was yesterday. We had a suicide prevention presentation. And in that, it talked about stress and suicide and depression. And I felt represented because <i>I</i> have depression and have been suicidal. Anytime else it’s just throwing shade, but then it was talking about a real topic.

The coaches also try to degrade the students. I’m sorry, but I’m not physically capable in the ways you want me to be. I can’t reach my toes, standing or sitting. It hurts to lay down and do curlups. It hurts to do push-ups. It hurts to do planks on hardwood floors. I can’t push up from benches because my hands are sweaty.

I can’t run for 20 minutes running and walking each minute. That’s a lot. And you take points off of kids who literally are feeling sick because of your class. I’ve wanted to vomit in your class. You dehydrate us because you don’t let us fucking drink unless it’s a waterbreak. Then you overwork us and acr like it’s our fault for being tired. Fucking bullshit.