#people say i have a distinct writing voice but i cant tell!! because thats how i sound like all the time so it's like

[actualbird]

Can I ask 74 and 75? I'm super curious!! -🔥

for this ask meme

74) You’ve posted a fic anonymously. How would someone be able to guess that you’d written it?

ohhh this is a fun one HAHA. i think my go-to writing style elements are: dialog heavy, internal monolog heavy, a lot of explanation about feelings and past happenings, SPARSE NARRATIVE DESCRIPTION LOL (i suck at it), and a shithead sense of humor. plus, if the fic is titled in all lowercase.

ive had people from past fandoms come across my newer fics without knowing it was me yet and they said they totally recognized my writing style. while i cant describe what exactly makes my style mine, it seems it's rather obvious to others and people would have no trouble guessing

-

75) What scene in [Fanfic Name] took the longest to write? What was difficult about it?

ohhhh, you didnt specify a fanfic, dear fire!anon!! in that case, lemme just choose a fic myself HAHA.

for growing pains, one of my all time favorite fics ive ever written, the scene that took me the longest was this short snippet (short enough that it fits in one screencap omg) of giann after he finds marius in the basement

and the reason why it took me the longest wasnt because it was hard, no no. it took me the longest because first i wrote the scene, then i deleted LARGE CHUNKS OF IT.

this scene originally had wayyyy more going on in it. stuff like the bullies' reactions, giann and austin riding with marius in the ambulance, giann waiting by marius' bedside during his recovery, etc. but then i thought no no. no this scene doesnt need to have all that. what it needs to be is striking and dreadful, so i kept removing details until i got what you see now: just this short, horrible, full-of-fear snapshot. theres no reactions from people who dont matter, no and-then-after-that-here's-what-happened, theres just. giann holding his brother, begging for him to hold on

thanks so much for these asks :DDD

[ughgclden]

a third one??

i’ve got a pretty relaxed day today, so coming and going with responses is easier, downtime more conducive to spending 10/15 minutes writing you another letter, and i apologise in advance for the length of this one

in regards to my friend, she is really sweet, but we seem to have found ourselves in that dynamic when i never know if she’s being gay (platonic) or being Gay (romantic) and i’m already fairly emotionally stunted. house and i are alike on that front /hj

it was nice to be hugged like that, greeted like that, though, a reminder that it’s possible there are some people who do look for me in crowded rooms, even if it’s more likely than not that i’m not there. (incidentally, consider this and every other letter my way of hugging you)

i think if i had to teach mainly basics i would struggle, since i tend to go quickly and get excited, sometimes forgetting brains work differently than mine when it comes to retaining and learning information. i can see your point about the emotional support teacher though, i think there would be a… certain demographic that would be drawn to me, if you catch my drift /hj

i had an english teacher like that, she once gave me extra points on an essay for referencing dead poets society, and even though i don’t have her anymore, i still put her down as a reference, and email her from time to time anyway, she helped me a ton.

i think bookstore bee would be lovely, and it reminds me of aziraphale, which fits with you quite well. plus the best bookshops always have the pretty ladies behind the counters.

as for the other thing, i don’t want to minimise it by saying “it’s okay,” although that is my first impulse, mainly because objectively, it’s not, and because i know if someone said anything like that to someone i cared about i would. definitely get myself into trouble dealing with the bastard with the audacity to hurt my friends. that and i have the same anger for people like that, with the caveat that they can get away with directing it to me. truthfully, i’m used to it, which isn’t ideal, i admit. growing up, i went to a. forced integrated school, bringing in kids from other districts to raise test scores, and as most things turn out to be, the bussed in “smart” kids were mainly white, and the kids who originally lived in the neighbourhood were all hispanic. so naturally, as a hispanic kid from a different district in the gifted program, both sides hated me. i’ve got more than ample experience and that’s what makes it terrible. but i digress

the highs always comes with the lows, but in the words of ben platt, “when you’re high, i’ll take the lows, you can ebb and i can flow,” and i’ll be here to complement you in any way i can for as long as you’ll let me do so.

presenting is definitely scary, i recently had a debate kid ask me, “what’s the point of speaking if you’re not proving anyone wrong?” when i said i wasn’t in debate, but in speech, the sister program. the truth is, the point is telling your truth, even through other peoples’ words. sometimes we can’t find the words, but have no problem finding the memories that make pieces impactful, and true.

i bet in knitted jumpers with a skirt and docs you look lovely, and like someone remus lupin would be good friends with. i gravitate somewhere between remus and sirius, the two gay sides of me constantly battling that one out, so i end up with some… interesting outfits. cruella de ville is a goal, quite honestly, although i suppose technically shes classified as a villain, but then again, i’m a mentally unwell unstraight individual, so villains hot.

bee, if there’s anything i strive to do, it’s make you feel important, because you are, at the very very least, to me. and thats not silly, because believe me the sentiment is shared, thank you for spending time on me, love. i cant say it enough.

you are important, to reiterate, you are good, and kind, and the world could use more people like you. i only hope those lucky enough to experience your physical presence are sensible enough to know what a privilege they have in knowing you.

all of my love, bee, and a million wishes for a good day, good night, sweet dreams, and restful sleep.

until we meet again,

(likely tomorrow)

yours,

✨

please never apologise for the length of these, star. i'd read a whole novel of anything you say

it should me apologising for how terribly late my response is - i'm never much good at writing when i'm tired, or doing anything when i'm tired really. i'm one of those people who completely shuts down, and i wasn't going to torture you with my drowsy ramblings. im however writing this now with a fresh cup of coffee, so let's hope that helps

not knowing the distinction between gay and Gay is the worst; i can sympathise slightly on that front. when i was still figuring shit out i never knew if i just really loved my friend or really Loved my friend - it was all platonic, i know that now, but it was certainly a time. i think i'd always find myself searching for you in a crowded room - you have the sort of energy that draws people to you

you'd certainly draw in that certain demographic, i know it. although i think being the lgbt kids support teacher would be the largest honour bestowed onto a person, and no one else would suit that more perfectly than you. that's so sweet oh my god - i'm not too sure if my teacher had ever watched it, as sadly she never referenced it :( but she was very much a keating for me

i'm glad you know it's certainly not okay and i'm so fucking sorry that there's some ignorant assholes out there who think their stupid close-minded ideas and thoughts are important and need to be voiced, and they're justified in saying that shit. i truly hope things aren't as bad as they once were and if i could, i'd hurt anyone who's ever said that stuff to you (i can't fight, but i'd give it my best shot)

i totally agree with you- not everything has to be to prove a point, or make someone see something the way you do. sometimes it's just to communicate, to tell tales of love and beauty, to tell your own stories and thoughts. sometimes it's nice to talk just for the sake of it.

i think a mix of remus and sirius is wonderful - i aspire to have the sort of energy that sirius black gives off but alas, i'm more of a remus (or even a peter.. but we don't talk about that..) and yes villains are SO HOT OH MY GOD!!! yes they are bad ppl but they are hot and sexy so they can do as they please <3

we could go back and forth about this all day - but thank you lovely. not only do these make me feel important and loved, but they also let me talk about the smaller things, the little things that sometimes seem irrelevant because the world spins a little too fast to focus on the mundane. but even with you, the mundane is something spectacular.

have a lovely day, i hope it's filled with little bits of magic and wonder and joy. all my love star <33

[faunusrights]

Hey so... How do you like... Find character voices, tones and speech patterns or mannerism for your characters? Especially with so any variations on the same cast members? I really admire it, and am having trouble doing it for a story I've had outlined and a cast I've had set for years, but now the writing time cometh and I cannot for the life of me put dialogue to any of this.

WOOF this is a Big Ol Question but i will do my best to explain how i work 😞🤙 the art of dialogue is a careful one and entirely too much practice BUT we will push on

as such, stickin this under a cut

so i’m opening up with a quick flex on y’all: my dialogue is the one of very few things that was always very Good abt my writing (to the point that in uni it was one of those things ppl never even bothered commenting on cause they were like ‘idk i cant make it better lmao’) SO ive been doing dialogue for YONKS and at this point i dont rly have to Think abt it so much as just. do it. lmao

but one of the reasons i got Good was because an a monotone autistic kid i spent a lot of my early years like... listening to how ppl spoke and mimicking it because yall i used to talk At The Same Speed In The Same Tone At One Hell Of A Lick for years and tryna sound normal took me just shutting tf up and having a good listen to how other people spoke, which is my first tip: listen to people!! sit in a discord chatroom!! listen to convos in a coffee bar!! be nosy and listen in on convos!! humans r VERY GOOD at talking and we love 2 do it and theres so many types of dialogue to listen out for that will help u get better!

the other tip is thinking a lot abt personality and how that shines thru; every person i write is a very different person to the character next to them, and how they are effects how they verbalise shit; let’s take, for instance, yang and weiss, yeah?

YANG comes from a backwater island off the coast of vale; it’s a rural, outdoorsy farming community that’s very tight-knit and quite remote, which means a few things for yang’s speech patterns. ONE is that she talks in a dialect native to patch, which is a more drawl-y (yet surprisingly staccato) version of vale’s accent. it’s also SLATHERED in local slang and terms that any valian will be thoroughly unfamiliar with. we’re thinking of a mix of rural southern america and also somehow californian/australian surfer dude stereotypes??? it’s a WILD mix.

WEISS comes from the very high-class, very technologically-advanced and Strict society of atlas, which has scandinavian/germanic origins! her speech is very measured and very articulate, given the high standard of education she’s been subjected to, and her atlesian accent (again, very german-esque) can be suppressed very well in the right crowd to better fit in (tho it shows when she gets Angery). she rarely uses slang, she’s speaks very clearly, and it’s all very... prescriptive, yeah?

so yang and weiss have literally two OPPOSITE ways of speaking, built in entirely different communities for very different NEEDS and personalities. of course they dont sound like each other; it’s not just a change of location, but a change of person. even if weiss had lived on patch and yang in atlas, what you could guarantee is that weiss could still be a stickler for grammar and yang would still learn all the slang that’s used in atlas/mantle/solitas, right?

this same process can be done for any character; ruby’s manic and talks REALLYREALLYREALLY QUICKLY CAUSE SHE HAS SO MUCH TO SAY AND IF YOU STOP HER SHE’LL FORGET WHAT SHE WAS SAYING AND THEN SHE WON’T REMEMBER AND IT’LL BUG HER ALL DAY SO PLEASE LET HER JUST JUST THIS ONE REALLYREALLYREALLY LONG THOUGHT OUT FIRST PLEASE HANG ON JUST A MOMENT--

but blake is very sort of. laid back and chilled and brooding and considering revolution so for them, they speak less often, and usually in much more succinct thoughts: we’ll see a lot of one-word answers, a lot of bluntness. of course, this backfires when theyre trying to be genuine because sometimes it gets in the way! of course, compared to, say, tribelands blake, who is chieftain and is REQUIRED to be more articulate, we see a blake who is still calm and collected and therefore they speak rarely with error. all very thoughtful, a lot more like weiss.

of course, thats not even going into how they TEXT as seen in frapp logs (since how someone speaks and how someone TEXTS is like, two diff ways for speaking) which is a whole other kettle of fish that’s still impacted by a BUNCH of other factors!

dialogue, when boiled down, is basically just an extension of a character’s personality -- and it’s an IMPORTANT aspect of their personality, because speaking is how we impart a lot of our ideas and thoughts into a space that other people can, uh, interpret! a character is, ultimately, a bunch of concepts that form a person, and when they speak is when those concepts are on show for everyone to see! so WHAT those ideas are and HOW they envision those ideas informs the way their dialogue will function. are they like ruby, who thinks twice as quickly as she can get the ideas out of her mouth? are they like blake, who likes to mull things over before jumping to conclusions (unlike theyre impassioned, of course)? are they like weiss, who had her way of speaking beaten into shape by academia? or are they like yang, who speaks in a way that best allows her to connect with her community and her people? these are all distinct people and ideas!

a good way to test if theyre distinct in your writing is to write down a transcript w/o any tags or names, and see if people can tell you how many characters are in that conversation. the most distinct their voice (even if they use similar words or one another), the better chance you have at having characters with distinct speaking methods. consider every word! consider every phrase! everybody approaches speaking differently!

[hhhongseok]

PENTAGON: First Impressions VS Now! 

   since it's ptg's 3rd anniversary, and i've been an uni for over a year now, i thought it would be a fun idea to compare my first thoughts about all the members to how i think of them now! i got the idea from i got7 inspirits on youtube, so check them out if you're interested!

OT10

then:

I first heard "gorilla" back when it released, but since i avoided stanning rookies at the time- i decided to give it some time before stanning. flash foward to august 2018 where my interest is piqued again. at that time last year, i had thought that they were pretty cute but having literally only heard gorilla and then shine, i was caught off guard by their sound change. It wasn't bad per say- just different. overall, i knew pentagon would be a group that i'd like- but more along the lines of a casual thing. 

now:

y'all already know how whipped i am for these idiots!!! their music and videos and even choreos are my style completely, especially their cute concepts!! we love dancing infants! and also, they're all such throughly good people which makes me so happy. this isn't a casual stan thing in the slightest, and it's funny to think I ever believed it would be. 

Hui: 

then:

when i saw him in shine, i thought he was a d o r k. i think it was the way they styled his hair, but i was just very convinced that he was pretty lame lmao. after that though, i saw how cute he was and he became my bias for a while. i remember thinking at one point that he seemed like an exasperated dad?? i didn't really have any basis for it but that observation was there nonetheless. 

now:

exasperated dad? more like hyper 3 year old. hes literally one of the loudest and most energetic. what was i on. but i think hes the most precious and clingiest little toddler now!! i was right about the dork thing though, but its super cute how goofy and lame he is. also!! talent for days!! his dancing, singing (his falsetto is !!), composing is all incredible. the most important thing though? a godly leader. he's so caring and kind and full of love for his members it hurts me. we don't really see a serious leader hui, but thats okay because i think it means he tries to keep uni and ptg in good spirits by showing them cheerfulness. and that's amazing to me.

Jinho: 

then:

my most notable thought about jinho in shine was "how is he that small". i remember thinking it was cute how he pushed the giant one too, lmao. i didn't think much else of him beyond that, other than noticing how adorable he can be. 

now:

ok yeah, jinho is cute and tiny and whatever- but now i Understand the power that he holds. how he looks with his hair pushed back for example. or how about that bruno mars cover he did with hui. (hhhhnngg). also?? he's not even That small. the ones that make him look itty bitty are Literally just giants. but aside from his appearance, jinho is probably my favorite vocalist like!! i appreciate him s o much. (listen to his cover of gethsemane and last night of october for clear skin) of course jinho is also very cute though!! so i was right about that at least! he just also has many other great sides to him that i worry are overlooked!

Hongseok: 

then:

i didn't,,,notice him. at ALL. like i just glossed over his existence completely when i first saw shine. and even after that- it took me a minute to pay him any mind. when i did finally notice him though, i noticed his smile. i remember i was watching videos with my girlfriend and i pointed him out to her! that was mostly because i felt bad for not really having any strong opinion on him though oops. anyways i ended up just thinking he was a mom. and i was really impressed by his english and strength.

now:

real talk, it pained me to write all of that out!! bc now?? omg hong is my everything- but thats kind of obvious. anyways!! hes so  f u nn y !!! its absolutely a stupid kind of funny and hes definitely annoying but i adore it. also the mom thing is only kind of true. he has the capacity to be maternal and take care of them, but he's way more likely to make fun of literally every single member. he's more like an older brother that never leaves his siblings alone and thinks he's funnier than he is. and we hate him for it. anyways, his voice is So underrated im. angery. he has such a beautiful voice, just in general, and on top of that- his singing is lovely. like yes, more hong solo please. 

Hyojong: 

then:

i definitely took note of him immediately! his voice is very distinctive, and he stands out a lot in shine. which is really saying something. i thought he was really talented for sure! and i almost felt he was too cool for me to be looking at. i kind of got the vibe he'd be pretty icy i guess? 

now:

he's not intimidating at all. like not even a little bit. bc he's not taking himself as seriously as i thought he was lmao. also hes so   l o u d . and a plant man. but i think the best thing about edawn is his unpredictability! i never really know what to expect from him and i like that. 

Shinwon:

then:

i thought he was HOT. i already thought he was handsome in the 0.3 seconds of screentime he got in shine. but a friend of mine showed me clips of him from that couples game video and. o o f. i really couldn't get over how pretty he was. it didn't help that this was the same video where him and kino were doing that dance. personality wise, i don't remember much standing out to me. other than how easily scared he is.

now:

shinwon is soooo embarrassing. i wouldn't say hes completely shameless about it though, but he's shameless to the point of actually doing the stupid shit so im. still enraged about it. he legitimately makes me physically look away sometimes when im watching a video and he's being weird. theyre all my kids, and i love them. but he's the child im ashamed of lmao. moving on, hes a real cutie pie. that fact that he gets so scared so easily is both really funny and super endearing. but he's just a playful baby and im honestly glad that hes has so much fun.

Changgu:

then:

i noticed him less than hongseok. like i dont think i had a single notable first impression of him. 

now:

past dess was one entire Doofus huh. like changgu is a whole ass blessing to this planet and you mean to tell me that she overlooked him??!! anyways, though, he has an elephant heart for sure. such a genuinely empathetic and truly kind person!! he never fails to warm my heart with his sincerity and i love that about him. he's also part of the idiot squad though, with how he goes along with hong's antics. we hate that. and all his impressions + dumb faces. speaking of faces though,,, his acting?? i love it!! he's really talented, like when i watch pretty pretty i kind of forget that changgu is even playing a role. and his d a n c i n g!! underrated dance king! underrated king in general, how about that. 

Yanan:

then:

my first bias in ptg!!! i fell in love with him instantly! i loved how tall he is, and the white hair and his  i c o n i c "my baby"!! like i was whipped from the gate. i remember liking his duality back then too!!

now:

ok so, since he was bias immediately, i noticed more about him than anyone else. which means i have less to write oops. but thats okay because at least i had a bit of taste back then. but, yanan is hilarious. he's so clever and funny and you can tell how effortless it is. most iconic ptg sayings are something from yanan and thats just amazing. the big thing i notice now that i didn't really before, though, is that fact that his duality is so shocking because he's literally just as unpredictable as hyojong. its impossible to really tell what hes going to do next, and i think it catches people off guard more with yanan because even that aspect of him is unexpected. 

Yuto:

then:

i thought he was kinda scary!! idk he seemed so cold and i couldn't really relate to that so i didn't grow very attached to him. 

now:

he's so pure!!! hes said that he has a hard time expressing his feelings but i don't really see it? because he always seems so happy to be around ptg and having fun with them even if he isn't usually the one playing around!! he loves them so much tbh and its the sweetest thing :( everything about yuto is so sweet, because he cares a lot about the people around him and doesn't want anyone to get hurt- even if its fake or a joke. and like, he's really hardworking too!! ptg have said multiple times that he works the hardest, and that really is saying something imo! and like, you can just see it even without being told that. whether its his workout journey pentory or the fact that he's literally been learning guitar. also!! omg the lyrics he writes?? heartwarming, romantic and life changing!! seasons and cosmo made me a different person. but yeah, he's such an amazing, warm person and i cant believe i found him scary. 

Kino:

then:

i thought he was the main vocal. like no joke, he was so charismatic and flaunting so  much in shine that i was like "ah yes. the main vocalist" hhhggg. i remember thinking he was pretty though, and that his stage name was super cute. but i wasn't very interested in learning about him, despite how he really caught my eye. for some reason, though, i eventually got the thought that he was really pure.

now:

main vocal hdzfhh kino relax you're confusing ppl. of course he has an amazing voice and it always sounds incredible but!! what amuses me is the way he sings always sounds kinda like he's trying to be sexy and?? its so funny in ballads and stuff imo. but yeah, that "sensual"?? singing is what threw me off back then. buf more importantly, i just wanna mention the pure thing- because its a confusing situation. on one hand, kino has a heart of gold that not only adores uni but is also accepting. as well as how he's constantly bringing light into the world with his words and truly bright outlook. but on the other hand he's a demon that dances like That and is so dangerous when he wants to be!! so!! what's it gonna be kino, make up your mind :( anyways, listen to knnovations. esp bad timing and 224.12!!

Wooseok:

then:

i loved him instantly. he looked like an overgrown 10 year old in my eyes and that's just. precious. i thought he was pretty funny too!! 

now:

if i took off my hong glasses for long enough, id be able to say that i think he's the funniest in ptg. because he's so hilarious in my eyes like? he makes me do an ugly wheeze laugh, and a lot of my favorite ptg moments involve him in some way lmao. but he is actually a baby, so i was onto something there with the overgrown 10 y/o thing. despite being really funny though, i do think he tends to be quiet more often than like hui or shinwon and he hardly ever smiles, unless he's like laughing and thats makes me think that he's kind of awkward?? not in like a bad way, but i just kind of see that i guess. but!! something that i think is passed over a lot with woo is the fact that he usually has a hand in composing, and also that he writes his raps?? like that's so cool, we love that!! 

ok! so that was my lame little essay lmao. i hoped you liked if you read it all! im just glad to say that i really appreciate pentagon as a whole, and how much joy they bring into my life nowadays!! i feel like ive found a place to call my own with uni and with pentagon :)

[theladyofthewest]

I’m an emotional mess so :)

A lot of these posts have been going around and I have had the distinct honour to have been tagged in some myself. Firstly, a huge thank you to anyone who did tag me, I can’t begin to describe how happy you made me by doing that. 

Secondly, one thing I want to say is that a lot of this list is comprised of people I hold very dear to my heart especially considering that even though our interests may vary and I may not post about things they enjoy anymore, they’re still here and really that shows me that I have friends who are here for me, who like me, and not any content I post so for that I’d like to extend another huge thank you. i can’t begin to describe to all of you what that means to me :) <3 

@wreathoflaurels​ : Oh mannnnn haha where do I begin??? Umm Laura is like literally one of my best friends and I cant begin to say how relieved I am that I mustered up the courage to talk to her that one day cause its been nothing but love and support and caring for each other since. i cant understand how someone i have never been able to lay eyes on in person could have so much of my heart and so much of my trust. I would lay down my life for you in a second and i dont think I get nearly enough opportunities to show you that. You are such a giving and supportive person and I truly count myself privileged to have been able to meet someone like you and count you as one of the people nearest to my heart. I love you and I want nothing but the best for you. 

@gobodosama​: Someone else that I count myself so blessed to have mustered up the courage to talk to omg. I remember the first time I spoke to Abbey was on one of her streams and she was so kind and supportive that I immediately thought ‘well fuck she’ll never like you.’ But!!!! by some miracle, she did and I get to say, with so much pride that Abbey is one of my best friends. Abbey is someone I have been able to pour my heart out to and never feel like my words will be misconstrued or misinterpreted. I truly feel like the best version of myself when I am speaking to you and i CANt begin to thank you enough for that. My super talented, kind, loving, beautiful best friend. Stay awesome, I love you. 

@sankontesu​ :Sometimes I sit there and wonder to myself how I, hell the world, got so lucky to have someone like Lali. honestly. Lali is easily one of the kindest and most generous and open hearted people I have ever met. Lali, I remember being absolutely floored that you would spend your own money on commissioning art of Reiko for me as a birthday present. That you hadn’t even met me and you were willing to spend your own money on me. We were so close to being able to meet in NYC and do I wish to god it happened so i could give you such a huge hug and thank you for being you. People can say whatever they want about Lali but let it be known that in all my life I have never met someone like you, someone who is so good to the core and deserving of nothing but love. I love you, even if we havent spoken in so loooongg, and I hope you are always smiling cause you deserve nothing but . 

@mirsan​ :Angie is someone that I could talk about for days. I would never get tired of announcing to the world how much Angie means to me as a person and how beautiful and giving and caring and supportive she is. There have been too many occasions for me to quote to anyone where I have felt like Angie would take on the world for me and there have been times where she has done just that. And whats most amazing about Angie is that its not just me or any of her friends that she would do that for, Angie would do that for anyone. That is what makes her such an amazing person. Angie i have been able to cry to you, cry with you, laugh with you, and listen to horrific 10 minute voice notes with you, do dramatic live readings of horrific fics with you - you name it. I will never forget that when I was scared of seeing someone to talk to, it was you who talked me through what the initial process would be and gave me the courage to go through with it. i cant thank you enough for that. I love you so much you are literally my life coach, be mirsan af and happy always, i will fight anyone who contradicts that. 

@narkik​ : amandaaaaaa omg. Amanda you were probably my first friend on here. The Office AU haha and I remember thinking that you were waaaaay too cool for me and lo and behold I am correct. You are such an intelligent and beautiful person, so easy to talk to and i love that i can go months without talking to you and yet the next time we do talk its like it was just yesterday. idk what it is that makes me feel like I could talk to you about anything but know that i would literally fight the entire universe in order to put a smile on your face because you deserve that. Its weird how someone can be the opposite of me in so many ways and yet we can still be so similar. I love you and I want to always write smut that makes you cry in public places from trying not to smile haha, please stay happy always!!!

@aaya-ranjha-mera: omgggg you are a wild card entry! I can not begin to fathom how close I have gotten to you in such a short time. I can honestly say that I never expected for you to become a daily fixture in my life where it feels weird if we arent talking about one thing or the other. I love that i can always count on you to understand how im feeling and offer perspectives on it that i didnt even imagine. I love how I dont have to explain things to you, you seem to just understand them and sometimes its like you’re just on the same brainwave as me haha (our twins moments are far too many to count). You understand me and my love for certain,,,, characters,,,, *sigh* in a way that makes me feel a little more sane at the end of the day anD i LOVE you for that. I adore that you trust me enough to talk to me about things because the feeling is 10000% mutual and I would fight the entire planet for you!

@smilebomber : OH RINNE.. soMETIMES i think about you and just get really emotional because you are such a pURE soul and you honestly must be protected at all costs. When i think sunshine and happiness and the warmth you get from being around someone you love, I think of you. You’re so strong and loving and beautiful and TALENTED. Is there anything you cant do?? i think not. I love that youre always so considerate of everyone around you, you’re always thinking of others and their feelings and i want you to know that I am always always always thinking of you and i have so much love in my heart for you. you have been there to ask me if i’m okay when I’m feeling down, to leave me nice asks and pick me up messages and I can’t find words to tell you how much that means to me. All I can really do is impress on you that I will always, in any circumstance, be here to do the same for you and if anyone ever tries to make you feel like you are anything short of an actual goddess I will come for their ass so help me god. 

@hedevimaiyya: i want to say to you shivangi that i am guaranteed going to cry typing this and if you laugh i will kill you ok. Shivangi omg omg omg i have been able to tell you things that i would never tell anyone else, i have been able to cry to you in ways that i dont know if ive done to someone else. You understand me on a wavelength that I dont think even I can reach??? When i talk to you its like all my sadness and stress becomes background noise because we just have so much fun talking to each other. I share everything with you, be it art or fic or OCs and you make me feel like ive done something worth the nobel prize every single time and I cant tell you the fuzzy feeling i get every time you message me because you are associated with goodness and happiness to me and I just feel so strongly for you. I would murder anyone who hurt you and I have been on the verge of doing so more than once. i hope to god, more than anything, that you come down to ontario so i can hug you and scream or i come up to montreal and you can laugh at my french which, while being fluent and spoken with a correct accent, is probably horrible. I LOVE YOU BOOBOO ILL DIE FOR YOU. 

@onikik : You know what michelle you wanna know the truth. i struggled a lot writing your paragraph. Because i dont know where to begin talking about you. Do i start with your talent, with the fact that youre the actual hand of god? do i start with your wonderful ideas and humour?? Or do i start with the heart of pure gold in your chest? You are honestly one of the most amazing people I have met hands down, you are always ready to spread love and care and be there for other people. You - god Im getting teary eyed thinking about it - you go out of your way to do things for other people and even when youre doing a commission you go out of your way to personalize it for the person and really make them feel like you did this for them and only for them, to make them happy. theres this loving intimacy in everything you do that makes everyone around you feel like you care about them and that you are there for them. idk how you do it honestly but i think youre an actual god. yOU must be i cant imagine there being any other way that you could be so beautiful and kind and loving and giving and caring and just pe r fect. I love you and id die for you and kill for you. know that always. 

and to you beautiful, beautiful people: you are all such amazing people who have made me feel so loved and welcomed. I see your URLs on my dash and I immediately am filled with warmth and love because thats exactly what all of you represent to me!!!!!

@ohblackfire, @kristicles, @thequeenwillruletheboard, @oh-haseena, @inukag, @sinuyasha, @kongosoha, @ashcanvas, @macabre-and-cheese

to anyone I forgot: I am so incredibly sorry. Know that if your name isnt on this list anywhere, that doesnt mean you’re not in my heart and that I wouldnt give my actual life for you. I have a horrible memory and I give you my deepest and most sincere apologies. <3 

[chickenstuffedwithmozzarella]

Holii! Yesterday your inbox was hungry again and ate the ask number 8 :( (i don’t really know if the problem lies on your inbox or im doing something wrong when sending the asks tbh). Im sending it again only bcs it was the first part of the two asks i send about my sister, and maybe getting only half of it doesn’t make that much sense. You don’t have to answer, it just bothered me, sorry xd

Awwwww, I have customer that always says holiiiii!!! When she comes. And now she reminds me of you, jajajaa. But I read your holiii!!! with her voice 😅. I counted yesterday asks and there were 10, so maybe this time the problem was in your end 😝😝?? I see we’re both geeks of tech things,jajajajaja. Also, where is the message about your sister again??? jajajajajaj 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ what a pair. I thinks is just Tumblr, that is shit… jajaja

I saw the video of SOOT/Durkink. I wasn’t expecting that and i laughed too loud. JAJAJAJA. Also, i don’t know if you have instagram, but did you see Liam’s stories? He tried singing JBalvin parts and it was a mess. I guess they can now understand my struggle. He looked so lost, poor baby. That was even better than “una sacapuntas”. 😂 Anyway, i’m going to answer you now. (oh, and i’m sorry but for me its no under the cut. No even if i log in and read it on my dash).

Jajajajajja, it was very funny, wasn’t it? I’m gonna tag you in everything that makes me laugh,jajajajaja. Awwww, liam was so cuteeeee. I laughed so much as his puppy face. He looked so lost. He was so convinced he was talking Spanish… ayyyyyy. It’s a 10 for the effort. I kept thinking: that’s how I must sound singing in English,jjajajaja.

Here we go. Okay, first of all,i have to say that this new distribution was so confusing the first time i read dit, bcs it took me a while to figure out what were my asks and what were your answers, so at times i started reading and went…uuumh, that sounds familiar, i could have written that. Waaait… 🤦 🤦 🤦 Quite lame, jajajajaja. (1)

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I’M SO SORRY FOR THAT MESS!!! I wrote everything in a note. And your asks were in bold. And when I started I thought: remember to check later that it stays this way on tumblr!! Butttttt, when the time came I was SO SLEEPY!!! I totally forgot!!! 😅😅. So, I’ll go back to normal this time, just in case (though I’m writing it the same way. I hope I don’t forget later🙏🏻). Also, I wanted to tell you a lot more, but I forgot everything,jajaja.

Yees, im feeling better, thanks for asking

Well, if it was fatigue, you have the whole weekend to rest. Hope your feeling better. Lol, I feel the same, jejeje, when I see you’ve messaged me, I’m like: how do I let her know I’ve read it, but I can’t answer now??? Asjkxs;sjdhcbuidsljd

I’ve been streaming it since yesterday, and imo is not bad. There’s only one sentence im feeling a bit ambivalent about, bcs im picky like that, but i think its quite good. I cant wait to hear it on the radio and tell everybody “THATS MY SON”(My friends are gonna freak out when they discover that for once, i know the lyrics of a JBalvin song. JAJAJAJ). You have to work 10h each day? That’s a long shift. Is that your usual schedule or is only this weekend? Espero que te sea leve 😘 (3)

I heard it again today, for a bit. And it isn’t reggeatton exactly? It doesn’t have that rhythm that I hate, jajjaja. So I think I’ll be able to listen to it. I haven read the lyrics yet, so I can’t tell you anything about it :/ Same about my friends,jajajjaa. I think mine are gonna be more shocked about me knowing a song in Spanish,jajajaja. They’re always teasing about not liking Spanish music. Which is not true, but well… 🤷🏻‍♀️ What sentence you don’t like? And my shit is parted, so al least I have a couple of hour of rest. It’s how small shops work. So 🤷🏻‍♀️ I don’t have to be back till next Saturday, so… jajajajaja

Ohhh. (I see what you did with IICF lyrics. Smart girl). I was indeed paying attention. I swear. I took notes and answered you at the same time. I’m used to take notes of the subjects while doing essays, so it wasnt hard. Your taxes are on safe hands, don’t worry. My indecisiveness help me broke the system. You choose the pink??? Well done!💖 (4. I think? Why do i lost track so easily?)

How lucky you are, you can pay attention to more than one thing. If smartphones and SM had been a thing back on my student days, I would have failed everything. In fact I did. The first time I had internet at home, I was 15. Oh god! The memories. Back then, Terra’s chat (that you probably don’t know what it is. I myself, don’t remember exactly either) was very popular to talk to people. I met a guy. Ah! My first real crush. We talked everyday via Messenger!! Awwww, he was 17. We talked so much… jajajajajaja I was pretty obsessed. We talked from 6pm (it was when my internet started to be cheaper), till 12am (bc we both had to wake up early the next morning. Oh my god!!!!! Jajjajaja. One day I told him my real age (he thought I was 16), and then we lost contact. Ay! my first love,jajajaja. We never met. ANYWAY!! This all just to tell you that I failed 6/11 class subjects that the first trimester!! It was the first time I had failed ANY class! And ended failing the whole year 🤦🏻‍♀️. So, good for me to not have had an iPhone back then,jajajaja.

Yes me too. With some of the shirts from Harry’s merch I feel like they didn’t even try. Lyrics with a font that looks like Times New Roman… Really? And yes. They are expensive. You haven’t decided it yet? Do they usually have the same things that in the web? Do they have more As you see, im not very versed in merchandising or concerts. Enlighten me pls. (I must say, i’m loving the Honey updates). (5).

I don’t even know what/where/IF they sell merch at Niall’s concert. I would think they do, but 🤷🏻‍♀️. I think I’d buy a shirt. I have the shirt Steve sold for JHO (all black, with Louis and Steve’s silhouettes on the breast, and  just hod on written in the back); and the shirt of Harry’s concert. So I’ll like to have one for each of the boys. I’ll see.jejeje.

Yes, it makes perfect sense. I totally get it. When I first heard OMO I thought “lol, me”. And when i heard Mirrors i though “not so lol. Me too”. I was so touched when he explained what was the reason that made him wrote Mirrors. He is too pure. We are so lucky to have him. After hearing your story i can assure you; i’m never going to get a lip ring. Never. Do you still have it to this day? 9 ear piercings? I still have to find the energy to go and get a 2nd one. (6)

One of the things I’m loving about the hiatus, it’s my new love for Niall. When I first knew the band I thought: I can understand why people like all the boys, but Niall? What’s is there to like??? And oh girl, was I wrong! In my humble opinion, he’s the one who’s having the best solo career. Not based in awards or anything like that ( I don’t think successfulness is marked with that). But I don’t know, he’s making a name for him. He had it so “difficult”. Because when people heard his name, they didn’t put a face or a gossip story behind it. But step by step his making himself known, and I’m very proud. And I love his music. And I love to hear him talking in interviews. And those work out sessions are paying off, ajajajajajjaaajsj. So, all my respect to him. (To te rest too, eh 😜)9 ear piercing plus the ones you “get born” with!!! Jajaja. Those were the 00s,jajjajaja.

Well, they cant be much cheaper than now, right? Bcs now we have to pay for separate tickets. That way would be just 1. Let’s see. They would play all of their songs from Four. Almost all of the tracks from Made in the AM and MM. Compulsorily. But i let them have creative license choosing which songs from UAN & TMH they want to play. Im no dictator. What about you? What would you choose? A camera? Which kind of camera? I’m sure you’ll use it again. There’s plenty of occasions, trips & so. (6)

See? I was very sleepy, I didn’t thought about that. It would be just one ticket, not four like now. I seriously hate them. They only want me for my money 😡😡😂😂😂😂. My setlist would have to have! Over Again (indispensable), Four’s songs, MITAM’s songs, solo’s songs. Also, the stage would be small, so they had to talk with each other and walk around each other. And I don’t know, I just want them back together, jajajja. The camera I bought is the LUMIX TZ70. I saw someone has posted videos of Harry’s concert from very far away, but it was only his face. Like it had a big BIG zoom. And I went to their IG, and they had the name of their camera as a bio,jajaja, bc people asked them too much. So I looked it up in Amazon. And I bought it. Mymy. Now I only have to go on trips and those things to use it…😅.

Right direction? What a responsibility. Idk. All that topics are really related to what im studying, so i just learn about it in class, and then, outside the classroom, i read as many articles and books as i can. I just read whatever seems interesting to me. Sorry i’m useless. What i wanted to say is that im no expert on any of that subjects, but i find them interesting. Thats all. (Your mom cant recognise Liam? Im surprised bcs Liam has quite a distinctive voice, at least to me). (7)

I think it is interesting. I’d love to know a lot more. I just like to learn new things. And I love when people tell and explain me things when I’ve said something wrong. So, that’s what I meant, jejej, that if I ever say something wrong, feel free to call me out on it, please.I don’t know why she can’t recognize his voice!! She just says: it’s not this or that, so it has to be him,jajajaa. (I need your opinion on zayn and j Bieber, before I go on with this,jajaja).

JAJAJAJ. Sadly i get too many “hmmm, if you want…” with my friends. And they are usually followed by “You all are crazy”. But yeah, whatever. I’m living my truth. I’ll definitely come and talk to you. Dont worry. (8),

Yes please!! You’re always welcomed here with every wild thought you have!! Jajja. I’ll do the same. I’ll write tags post to you whenever I have something to tell you, jajajaja. Now, I’m gonna check my inbox again, to make sure I had t left any ask without  answer. You sent 12 asks today?? You’re amazing!! Thanks!! Ayayayay!!! I have to talk to you about a fic I’m reading. I haven’t finish it yet, but girl! It’s one of those I’ve had to stop reading bc it was to cute!!! I have even hugged my iPad  because I couldn’t hug Louis,jajaja. Do you read fics?? If that… lets talk, jajajajajja.Last, Honey came to say hello a while back. Their cousins (my sister’s dog) is spending the weekend here with them, because my sister is on a trip, so it will be an eventful weekend, I’m sure, jajajaja.Byeeeee Love!!! ❤️❤️❤️

Pd: answering to the last thing you said yesterday :) LOU IS BACK!!! But how predictable that was!!! Jajajja. Even I said we would see him now that Harry was  a world away. Anyway, I love seeing his face. Can’t wait for what it’s to come!! Bring it!! Jajajja