#people call me extreme for saying the military dictatorship fucked with my country and that perhaps colonization & the slave trade were bad

[blorboazula]

I don't talk about this on Tumblr at all, I leave this kind of shit to the hellhole that x-twitter is, but I just came across an atla fan – that I blocked for obvious reasons – saying they're pro-Israel.

bro, the main character of the show is literally a genocide survivor.

the name of the show is basically "look, the LAST airbender, the LAST one of his people, the ONLY ONE THAT SURVIVED"

every single character is a war victim.

what the fuck is wrong with you?

[radgirl-spray]

Rant.

it always gives me whiplash when gringos call me or other latinas on radblog "Republican" and "nazis".

Because they are so sure they are making such the point about us being nazis and bringing conservative and apocalyptic takes on them because we don't want men in females spaces, and yet from our perspective, they are still thousands of people all across latam who simply dissapeared when the north american goverment decided to interfiere in latam's politics which lead to real, actual genocides based on politic stance. Specifically being leftist.

My country in particular had one of the most brutal dictatorships in latam. Over 40.000 people were killed, tortured or simply dissapeared just to prevent socialism, despite the socialist president at the time being chosen democatrically.

Now, women, mostly college students feminists at the time were systematically tortured. I'm not talking about internet persecution or some horrible missgender crime. I'm talking of whole brigades raping 14 to 21 year old girls. I'm talking of soldiers setting girls on fire. I'm talking about men open pregnant women to dispatch the baby. I'm talking about torture and murder.

Why? because they dared to talk about politics, because they dared to talk about contraceptives. About feminine issues. For being Left.

It was also a time where the wrong opinion could get you killed, could mean your children being killed. For being brown, for being indio, for being poor. Think of you neighbour accusing you of hearing certain music and your house being raded and your teenage children being taken to a camp to never be seen again. I'm not talking 100 years ago. I'm talking my parents and anyone who is 5 years older than me.

To this day we are extremely affraid of police and the military. The levels of poverty Latam has are hardly something people in first world countries have seen in a years, because the poverty itself has been caused for said countries and their progress. I'm talking whole neighbourhoods of houses made of cardboard while some first world country leaves a bunch of chemical wasteland just right up the corner where we live so they live better.

Two years ago there was a breakout in my country, it was quite famous. You know the first thing the police did?

They raped and hanged a girl on the street. In 2021.

And then comes some random USA/Canadian citizen and calls you "a republican" and "a nazi".

Did I mention after II world war many nazis escaped to latam and formed whole german colonies for either experimenting on humans or create pedophile nets and raping centers? the more you know.

But we are nazis, we are republicans. Despite the fact that that our indigenous people recognize women as adult human females, that indigenous women were hunted down and used historically to be bred by whites colonizers just like them. Despite the fact that most of us are mestizos, that color and class go hand in hand in latam, that we have a culture heavily based on religious intakes of what's women's place and that we shut up when the men talk, because that's macho culture. We are nazis and we are republicans, despite the fact that their fucking country killed thousands of us because we wanted to try left and to hope for something more than extreme poverty. Shit, we've even been called colonizer by some chicano who doesn't even speak spanish. I mean, what are the odds.

But the white men need to speak, the gringo has something to say, they need us to respect their pronouns and go along with their progress. So they packed their bullshit religion and ship it right down the frontera, and now we have to swallow too. Because we are latinas, we live in the backyard, right? what do we know about the experiences of american dudes in skirts.

[mildredpierce8]

BEAR WITH ME AND MY RANT ABT THE NEW FITO PAEZ BIOPIC TV SHOW ON NETFLIX

OK......

So, basically Netflix released a biopic tv show about the life of Argentinian rock star Fito Paez and I'm literally so excited to watch it for a number of reasons, but the second I found out that this was a thing I got the urge to go on tumblr and just explode so here goes.

The show is called "El Amor despues del Amor", named after Paez's sensational hit song linked below:

*please listen its actually so good

Anyways the gringos butchered it and dubbed the show in English to be called Love After Music which makes no fucking sense because the song literally translates to Love after Love not Love after Music and it is just sooo stupid, but anyway what can I do abt that.

This show excites me so much, first of all, because I think Fito Paez 10000000% deserves this kind of recognition, because he really is one of the most iconic latinamerican artists of his generation, and his music challenged the assumption that good pop and rock music could only be made and produced in English.

I guess mostly the reason this show excites me is because it is a show about a latinamerican rock artist, which you just don't get that often and I have been dying to see one. (Also, Argentinian alternative rock is definitely one of my hyper-specific fandoms and new content being produced for it is really exciting).

My mission in life, amongst other things, is to give the South and Central American rock scene the recognition it deserves, because often times people act like it doesn't exist, and new wave/ 80s pop/rock only came out of the US or England. Latinamerican rock serves an extremely important purpose in society, as it was quite literally revolutionary. (I'm bullshitting and tired, so ignore the uneccessary sentences, but my point is valid). Rock in Argentina was used to fight back against A LITERAL MILITARY DICTATORSHIP. And the fact that all the rock music biopics are still England and US centric is really annoying.

I'm not saying I don't enjoy shows or movies about music produced in the US or England, but there are so many amazing stories to tell from the perspective and about the lives of Hispanic musicians. Why are they constantly overlooked?

AND NOT JUST ABOUT MUSIC

Where are the movies about Argentinian Military Dictatorship? (IK they exist guys im just saying we should talk more about the fact that it happened). Actually for anyone interested pls watch the movie "Argentina, 1985", it is great!

Where are the movies about indigenous communities being wiped from existence in virtually every South American country?

Or, as a Colombian, can we get a show about terrorism or the drug trade in Colombia that isn't made from the bullshit NARCOS perspective of white guy policemen saviors, when we all know that all American cops did in Colombia was militarize our police forces and teach them how to abuse the public.

I'm getting off topic

THERE ARE AMAZING MUSIC STORIES COMING OUT OF LATIN AMERICA

Like the entire Mexican punk rock scene it is so cool

Cafe Tacvba, Maldita, Caifanes.

Where's the series abt Colombian metalheads. The metal scene was huge.

Or the goth scene. There was a time where you would walk on the street and you would see crowds of Morticias going to dance The Cure at a club.

Or the fact that Seru Giran recorded their first album in exile in Brazil bcs the government literally had them on a hitlist.

Which speaking of Seru Giran, how is there not a movie abt that yet. Seru Giran is such an iconic fucking band led by none other than Charly Garcia. They are a gift from God to humanity, they are pioneers of progressive rock, I don't know anyone like them. And I'm always saying this but if Seru Giran were British or American they would be just as highly regarded as the Beatles or the Rolling Stones or Pink Floyd because they are just too good.

Here are some Seru Giran songs everyone should listen to:

*this man is everything. synth on top of a keyboard on top of a piano.

Anyways, if you're still reading at this point you are very dedicated and i appreciate that.

And side note, please watch this performance of Charly Garcia, Fito Paez and the one and only Fabi Cantilo bcs it is too good:

*ojos de videotape is one of the most beautiful songs ever written and sometimes idk if its even real.

OKAY SO, TO CONCLUDE THIS EXTREMELY INCOHERENT RAMBLING,

I am extremely happy about the fact that latino stories are being told in media like this because its something that i feel as a fan of rock music and a latina i have been missing from my life. And you may think why do we need movies abt dictatorship or drug deals or terrorism. Doesn't that just perpetuate the stereotype that that's all your country has. NO ON THE CONTRARY. When it's told by big American corporations, it often loses meaning. Shows written by latinos about latinamerican experiences showcase the reason I am so proud to be latina. Because we are a resilient people. Our humanity shines through even in the darkest of times. In the midst of wars and dictatorship, we can come up with shit like this and it is so cool. And I wish there was more recognition for that.

So yeah maybe this isn't a rant abt Fito Paez, even though I love him so much. And I'm more than sure this show is about his life and not about Argentinian military dictatorship.

But I guess mostly I hope this will encourage more latino filmmakers to tell our stories. Tell our stories because they are so cool, and I love watching movies abt rockstars. But I would love it so much more to watch movies about rockstars who look like me.

So I'll get back to this after I watch the show. Chau :)

[aroaceconfessions]

Rant incoming because I'm an over sharer! This was prompted by an aroace thought but actually is just me talking music lol.

As an aroace I tend to listen to what people call "edgy music", but sometimes I get tired of that, usually I listen to kpop or jrock since ei don't understand neither languages, but there are times when I go to older songs from my country, like rock songs, angry songs, a lot of them have no romance or sex mention, many are reflections or criticisms and I love that because, with how things are, I too am angry and singing out loud lyrics like "But Brazil gonna be rich, we gon get a million! When we sell the souls of our indigenous people in an auction. What kind of country is this? Is the fucking Brazil" (which, TMI: is by the most famous rock band in our country, whose front man was openly bi and the song where he talks about liking boys and girls still plays on the radio to this day) or "I see on TV what they say about young people ain't serious (sincere/thoughtful). The young people in Brazil is never taken serious" is revigorating.

But sometimes I go even further back and it's always a thrill ride.

Have any of you ever heard a Brazilian protest song? Like, from the military dictatorship years? Because the translations just can't really convey their meanings since the songs had to pass through the censorship to be released, so they had to play around with sounds and meanings.

Chico Buarque is the most prominent singer/songwriter of the time. He had this one song that went "Chalice! Push away from me that chalice of blood red wine", this is a very simple wordplay: chalice = cálice and shut up = cale-se. They sound very similar and as it is spoken by itself strongly before the phrase it's easier to think shut up than chalice, it was a reference to three things appearantly: the government killing to shut up people, telling people to shut up instead of reporting their neighbors to the military, and the government censorship, shutting up any form of opposition, protest and just art with content they disliked. Also red wine = Vinho tinto. Tinto literally translates to dyed, so it is "push away from me this chalice of wine dyed by blood", it's extremely in your face.

But the one I like the most is "Deus lhe pague" (may God pay you), the whole lyrics is just great, but when it goes into the end, he sings "For the deranged cry/scream that helps us flee/escape, may God pay you" but it sounds exactly like "for the deranged cry that helps us flee from this country". Somehow, he makes "Deus lhe pague" sound like "deste país" which in nowhere else sound similar but he got the approval!!!

I'm having fun with this kind of songs, they hardly have any romantic element and when they do is to mask the real meaning, which is very unique and makes me super giddy, since most songs do the contrary, uses normal words as euphemism for romance and/or sex, I can't say sit or eat without it being taken sexually. Anyways, I hope every aspec can find a safe musical place for when it gets hard to withstand amatonormativity.

[atamascolily]

lily watches fma:b, eps. 37-40

I can only watch 2 episodes at a time because I keep having to pause and write angry screeds in a text document. I suppose this is what is called “engaging with the source material” in media studies.

Cut for extreme length and also me ranting about Hohenheim because FUCK THAT DUDE. Also, worldbuilding stuff I don’t understand.

Ed reciting the periodic table to get his mind off his boner for Winry is just perfect.

Meanwhile, Winry's nerding out over combat automail and Kimblee's just sippin' his coffee watching the whole thing

Kimblee got Winry to like him by saying he admired her parents, argghhh

Pride is revealed to be Selim Bradley and harasses Hawkeye because he's a little shit... also it conveniently allows Buccaneer's tunnel team to escape. Why is Pride simultaneously in Central AND Briggs? I guess we'll find out.

Hawkeye going home and seeing her shadow and realizing just how fucked they are is PERFECT.

Kimblee tells Ed he'll give him a Philosopher's stone if Ed helps him find Scar and Marcoh and finish the job at Briggs (i.e., kill everyone to make a stone). Ed asks--very reasonably, I might add--why Kimblee is going along with the homunculi and his answer is basically "for the lulz". (Oh, and they let him kill people instead of locking him up for war crimes.)

(although I'd argue the homunculi only let him do so when it's personally convenient; they have no qualms about keeping his ass in jail otherwise)

(also: please note kimblee ISN'T in jail for war crimes against Ishval, he's in jail because he murdered some Amestrisian guards so no one would know he has a Philosopher's Stone.)

Ed's like, "so Winry, you're a hostage for my good behvior and I might have to comnit mass murder, fyi" AT LEAST HE FINALLY FOUND A WAY TO TELL HER

love how winry forces her way into the convoy and kimblee just goes with it because he's too busy to argue.

(meanwhile, the end credits still have her at the atelier in Rush Valley, lol)

Yoki's flashback in the 1920s film style is HILARIOUS (if biased) account

Scar and Kimblee face off. I'm reminded of the 2003 anime where iirc Scar sacrifices himself to utterly destroy Kimblee halfway through. no such luck here.

I'm still not happy that Scar killed Winry's parents in this version. It was much more interesting when it was the Amestrisian military--specifically, Roy Mustang, one of the so-called good guys.

(It's not that it was morally okay for Scar to kill the doctors who saved his life--or anyone--just because of their race but it's a whole 'nother ballgame when the murder cover-up for a military dictatorship and the perpetrator is a character the audience has come to root for vs. misguided revenge)

What IS interesting here is Scar confronting Miles, asking him how he can serve in the same institution that killed his family. Miles says he's trying to change minds from the inside; Scar is highly skeptical but claims to be glad there are people like Miles in this world (who aren't so consumed by hatred and grief that they can do that kind of work, instead of becoming a vigilante).

one of Miles' troopers has a backpack that's a phone. Okay... WHAT? I guess if they have automail they can have extremely bulk cellphones, but... I don't understand the tech in this world.

brief detour for Al to lecture the chimera prisoners, okay

Yoki actually has a good idea for once!

I don't understand the chimeras saying they want their bodies back - it seems like they can shift from human to their other form and back (they do it a few minutes later) so... I get that they've been experimented upon and it's horrible, but they're not quite in the same desperate straits as Al, who doesn't have a body at all, or Nina Tucker *sob*. Or am I missing something obvious here??

...okay, I think they were moved to DIFFERENT human bodies than their original forms? It's kind of unclear from context.  

Just as I was admiring Winry's piercings for the bajillionth time, a random dude tells her they'll cause frostbite so she takes them out and gives them to Ed as a token. And probably also so Kimblee will suspect the ruse later if/when he notices that detail.

Scar's like, "man, why'd I have to kill the FAMOUS doctors, sigh"

Al has a vision of his body and it's SO FREAKING CREEPY, YO (I like the detail that his nails are really long)

Cut to Father playing with little mini versions of Ed and Al on a transmutation circle in his lair OH YEAH THAT'S CREEPY - he needs 5 people to complete the circle. Ed, Al, and Hohenheim are each little skull-people, Izumi is "a possibility," and that leaves one more... probably Roy.

I love Hawkeye and Roy's verbal codes, Roy hitting on Olivier, Olivier straight up admitting to Bradley she offed Raven, Roy's apparent shift into the flower business, etc, etc.

TIME FOR A FLASHBACK.FINALLY SOME EXPLANATORY BACKSTORY.

Okay, so we meet Slave 23 in an alchemy lab - his master used his blood to make a creepy blob in a flask that is talking to him and names said slave "Van Hohenheim" (because he didn't want to be "Theophrastus Bombastus", lol.) There's a time skip and Hohenheim becomes a skilled apprentice alchemist thanks to the blob's interference and education.

Note: I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT ALL OF THIS. Also, WHY.

(but let's be real, I am distracted by the fact that young!Hohenheim, like old!Hohenheim, is extremely hot.)

The King of Xerxes summons the blob to ask it about immortality. I can already tell this is going to end well.

The blob tells the King the secret - cut to laborers digging a giant circular "irrigation canal". also, people start dying in coordinated attacks at specific geographic points just like in amestris.

I still don't understand how this works, though. In the 03 version, you just need a bunch of people to die all at once aftermaking a few preparations. It was city-scale, not country-scale.

also apparently, there's been a time skip because Hohenheim is significantly older than before (his job is to carry the blob in its flask around, I guess?). He's so excited about the immortality thing yet seems to have NO IDEA what it entails.

The blob made the actual center of the circle where Hohenheim was standing so everyone else dies. I'm not sure how that works because it's only a few meters off--is it really that precise?--but okay, whatever, sure.

Also, the blob regards Hohenheim as "blood kin" because it was made from his blood and... it's not WRONG.

the gate opens, the flask is shattered, Hohenheim is now immortal, and everyone in Xerxes is dead, and... Hohenheim was totally an innocent bystander who just HAPPENED to be caught up in it all?

not gonna lie: I'm not thrilled about this development.

I preferred the 03 version where Hohenheim was actively a bodysnatching jackass who decided to DO BETTER BY NOT DOING THAT. somehow the fact that he ends up immortal without trying here just sticks in my craw.

oh, no, but this means that HE KNOWS EVERYONE IN HIS PHILOSOPHER'S STONE PERSONALLY, DOESN'T HE? AHHHHHH

Father takes on Hohenheim's human form because they have the same blood and it's convenient?(also:hot, though I doubt the blob is interested in sex appeal.)

Father: Isn't it great? immortality, amirite? Hohenheim: *through gritted teeth* Thanks, I hate it.

Father and Hohenheim each got half of Xerxes' population, aka half the power.

turns out this was all a dream-flashback and Hohenheim is actually asleep on a train in the present and Izumi wakes him up.

have they met before? signs point to no because Hohenheim doesn't seem to know her. I'd ask how Izumi recognized him, but Hoheheim looks JUST LIKE ED so it's not like it's *hard*.

most awkward parent-teacher conference ever? but actually izumi starts coughing up blood and Hohenheim realizes she's performed human transmutation and opened a gate and uses alchemy to help her.

he can't restore the lost organs (I'm not sure WHY not - he has a philosopher's stone, that's like the whole point) but it helps.

AND THEN HE JUST COMES OUT AND SAYS HE'S A PHILOSOPHER'S STONE IN HUMAN FORM, ARRGGHH, WHYYYYYY, I don't get why he can't just fix her!!

sig decks hohenheim and I'm so thrilled, even if it doesn't actually take. THANK YOU SIG, I LOVE U.

Also: if Hohenheim had stuck around, he could have healed Trisha and she probably wouldn't have died and his sons would never have lost their bodies trying to bring her back, so FUCK YOU HOHENHEIM, THIS IS LITERALLY ALL YOUR FAULT. (And apparently, the homunculi are too, at least indirectly). FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU.

[nxelethe]

Has anyone wondered how Cradle is governed?

Now, you’ve got to bear with me here, I haven’t played all the routes so maybe we get more information later, but seriously, how the fuck is this place governed?

Probably the first issue is that Cradle is a single country, but divided into distinct zones based on military presence and the demilitarised Central Quarter. The entire premise of the game hinges on the concept of imminent war between the Red and Black Armies, that’s fine. Neither side however is fighting for independence, so the concept of Cradle attempting split based on something like distinct state ethnicity seems out of the question. Everyone seems fairly comfortable with being a Cradle citizen. Although people living in red and black territories seem to support the corresponding army, I believe it would be a stretch to call the different parts of Cradle separate states.

Adding to this motivational confusion, what are the motives of the Red and Black Armies? Red’s ambitions are made clear from the very beginning—absorb the Black Army and rule over Cradle. However, we all know this to be a ploy by the Magic Tower (we’ll get onto this in a moment) and after Amon is defeated, both armies continue to coexist with their territories intact. This has been the case for centuries apparently. The Black Army itself displays no ambition beyond securing their existence; they don’t intend to absorb the Red army, rule Cradle, or anything of the sort.

So, who runs this country? The naming system is obviously based on playing cards, but you can’t get away from the connotations that titles such as ‘King’ or ‘Queen’ entail, and through various events we’ve seen that the people of cradle turn to these armies for leadership—especially Lancelot (who, given that he inherits the title, would be most reminiscent of a King in the sense that Alice and we are familiar with). 

Typically, a country will have a military force, but in order for this to work and for the force to exist, they most be funded by a government to tackle domestic and foreign concerns of said government—in most cases. Cradle’s hypothetical government, should be officially funding a military force, though that by  no means excludes the possibility of a legitimate paramilitary force. Yet, Cradle’s government, the Cradle state, or anything of the sort, plays no role in its military actions. Even if the two armies were engaged in a civil war for Cradle’s governance (which the game loosely claims that they are) then the government would be expected to support one of the two armies. These armies wage war on the whims of their lead commanders, no government influence as far as the eye can see.

So what is Cradle doesn’t have a government?

OK, that’s a bit unfair; what if Cradle has a government but it’s not distinguishable, or indeed different, to the armies? With all the evidence provided, Cradle seems to be ruled via military dictatorship, a khakistrocracy, if you will (it’s very rare that I get to use fun portmanteaus so I always jump at the opportunity). Even in that case, Cradle’s governance still isn’t that simple to decipher. 

Officially, there have been ‘tensions’ between the Red and Black armies, though I don’t believe them to be a prolonged ceasefire, given that the armies “declare war” in the various routes and don’t issue a ceasefire revocation. Admittedly, this is arguing technicalities, and one could similarly say that the “peace talks” that Alice interrupts when she first appears in Cradle would have been to end hostilities. I’m hesitant to approach the issue this way, because peace talks don’t NECESSARILY mean that they are terminating physical conflict and the interactions between army officers like Luka and Edgar certainly don’t seem to suggest that they are technically still at war. 

Regardless, the issue of the two armies coexisting in such a way remains. Even if Cradle is ruled via military dictatorship then the Central Quarter becomes a big issue. Officially demilitarised and not allied with either army, the Central Quarter also houses the majority of the businesses in Cradle—businesses which, even back in the 19th century, would have faced some legal restrictions or at the very least recognition allowing them to exist. What power is doing this? 

It can be neither the Red nor the Black army as they have no influence over the area, so who governs the Central Quarter? It has no police force, we’ve seen the armies leap in to protect citizens numerous times without external aid and it isn’t presented as a problem or violation of a demilitarisation agreement.

Enter, the Magic Tower; a civic agency and possibly the key to the entire issue.

The Magic Tower, the Big Bad of the game, has clear intentions and those are to rule Cradle through the Red army, which would at least make this question easier to answer. If this were to occur, the government would be a military dictatorship, albeit controlled by a shadow agency before eventually being overtly controlled by Amon (I would assume) leading us to a personalist dictatorship.

Where the Magic Tower truly helps in answering this question is in its nature—a civic agency. Civic agencies can be assembled by groups of individuals looking to perform a specific task for the benefit of society and don’t necessarily require the existence of governments. They are merely characterised by the ability of citizens to work collaboratively to solve common societal issues. Do they exist in areas with governments in reality? Yes. Could they exist independent of said government? Unlikely, but possible in theory.

Cradle is a small country, we’re told this from the very beginning of the game, so what if it actually doesn’t have a government?

It’s almost certain that Cradle had a centralised government once, more specifically, whilst the Red and Black armies were actually one and the same. My memory is sfoggy, I believe it was orginally a monarchy? I can’t remember, whatever the case though, it is extremely likely that Cradle was governed by SOMETHING at this point in time. 

Even in our reality, countries existing without governments isn’t completely unheard of, though it is almost always well-established countries with stable economics that can trundle on without heads of state or governments. If Cradle was a relatively stable state at the time, then it is not entirely beyond the realm of possibility that Cradle could be in such a lovely stable state without a government. 

We could even entertain the notion that various civic organisations assumed control of the essentials for the state’s continued function. Obviously, it’s not foolproof (*cough* Magic Tower *cough*) but theoretically it could function. 

This would typically be where I call it a day and tell you that I think that Cradle is maybe a weird example of Mutualism or Collective Anarchism, except for a teeny tiny problem, or should I say two teeny tiny problems.

The Red Army would certainly be one, but really that just brings us to the broader issue at hand: the aristocracy.

Anarchism is fundamentally the rejection of unjust hierarchies so the Red Army’s arbitrary and hereditary hierarchy is basically entirely contrary to the very ideology I’m trying to marry it to. Furthermore, the mere existence of the aristocracy is basically indicative that if any anarchist systems had tried to take route they’d have fundamentally failed.

So what else is there?

I would like to propose a very oxymoronic ideology: Anarcho-capitalism.

Now I will go ahead and do the work for you here, this is also not the case because it’s shown to actually work, which is honestly the last thing anyone believes anarcho-capitalism can do. I’d also like to clarify, that this ideology is hardly anarchy, but we’ll use this classification for the sake of convenience.

We clearly see the use of money in the game, classes and, most damning of all, private property. However, no government. Perhaps a better defined description, would be a state entirely driven by free market economics without state intervention. 

But, the Magic Tower is an obvious monopoly for the distribution of magic crystals, therefore clashing head-first with the concept of free market competition.

The possibility of a Night-Watchman State exists, which would also excuse the excessive military presence for such a tiny country, but this would also require the existence of a state to justify interventions by these bodies. A state which I cannot find sufficient evidence to claim exists.

So conclusion?

I haven’t a FUCKING CLUE and boy am I mad about it.

I have written a long-ass text post that my few followers are going to justifiably unfollow me for only to conclude that I have no idea how Cradle works and that Cybird didn’t give it enough thought or I would have found this slightly easier. Maybe Cradle is a nice place, so that it honestly becomes a no-brainer that Alice would want to leave the political shambles Britain, romance or no (I wouldn’t blame her).

Does anyone have any idea what could be going on? I’m borderline dying to find out at this point.

Sorry again, and thank to anyone who tolerated my nonsense until the end.

[wishingfornever]

11/21/17 – No Contact:  Impatience

I’m impatient, I think.  I can’t stand watching youtube videos under 2x speed.  And even then, I mindless click away.  I have no patience, hence impatient.  Maybe I’m restless.

I went out to apply for some jobs.  Not much now.  Applied for the HEB. I’ll apply at other locations soon.  Again, I can manage for another two weeks if need be.

Hrm… NationStates.  It’s a riot.  A few days ago, I decided to comment in a thread asking if your nation (YN) would be able to defeat the above nation (AN) militarily.  I use stats to determine my nation.  That’s obvious. However, I also avoid certain stats in lieu of my own.  Instead of having 2.022 BILLION citizens as of writing this and have the population of China and India, I choose to limit myself to 10 million people.  The reason for this is simple: 10 million is an easy number to remember.  Cuba has a population of 11-12 million and my country is supposed to be smaller than Cuba.  I figured the population gap would decrease with my massive technological increases and healthy citizens.  May be wrong, but whatever.  The Dominican Republic has my population and is about the same size as my theoretical nation.  Probably smaller.

Ah, just checked.  By my own lore, it’d appear my nation is smaller…

Anyways, population of 10 million.  Military might is in the top 4% in the world, almost top 3%.  Scientific Advancement is top 3%, unsure how close it is to 2%.  We’re top 3% in health, intelligence, and healthcare.  Top 4% in information technology, pacifism (shut up), and top 22% in Arms Manufacturing. My nation’s military uses conscription.  I’ve meticulously written out the inventory, taking into account military spending, what I can and can’t do with said spending, and based the inventory off other REAL world nations with equal power. A lot of thought and planning. This guy…  Dis muthafucka.  He says he can take on ALL that “In a longshot” so it wouldn’t even be close.  Upon further inspection, his population in game is 45 million.  That sounds impressive, but if we really did population stats I would win without end based on that alone.  But I don’t because population is too damn high.

His arms manufacturing is top 14%, information technology is at 20%, military is at 21%, has a death rate of 21% (top 21% in the world, mind you and not only 79% survives to adulthood), scientific advancement is at 28%, and everything beyond that is just… crap. Now, clearly by stats alone he’d get DESTROYED.  Even if he had 42 million to my own lore’s 10 million.

Here’s the thing. This muthafucka… his active personnel is 12 billion out of 19 trillion.  This is HIS OWN LORE.  Reserve of 10 billion, 2 million WMD’s, 1 million nuclear, 100 million chemical, and has all this other scifi sounding crap like “antimatter” or “black hole bombs.”  I mean… really?

He has ONE billion active ships with ONE billion active sailors.  These are all in space, I assume but I’m not sure.  Makes you wonder how many people are required to run something that’s called a “Ship” of course, but whatever.  And, of course, there has to be more people running logistics on the planet and won’t actually be on ships.

Then there is Air and Space with more ridiculous numbers and he uses a screenshot for a Helghast from Killzone and says, “Super secret supersoldier project.”

I mean… seriously? What’s stopping me from retconning my lore and just saying, “Yeah, well we have 50 trillion people and 12 trillion are military and I have another trillion ships with only 50 pilots who are so advanced they can fly all trillion ships WITH THEIR FUCKING MINDS!!!” I’m not trying to crap on him for using Future Tech (or FT).  My Nation (from now on will be referred to as MN for simplification’s sake; should have done this sooner but whatever) is certainly bordering on Future Tech, thanks to the HUGE advancements in science.  Not the top, but definitely near there. Walter and I wanted to device a bit of a cold war and to demonstrate some games for settling disputes.  It would have began with Wargame:  Red Dragon, had Kerbal Space Program, a few others, and ended with Supreme Commander.  That certainly would have been future tech. I designed MN to basically be… flexible.  I’ve prepared not just military histories but also political ideologies.  Mostly for conflict purposes, but these conflicts aren’t EXCLUSIVELY violent.  In fact, my own nation’s lore has been that MN has never beaten an enemy in ANY combat until 2017.  Really, my history is just supposed to be funny but also balanced. I REALLY want to get a thing started with other nations where terrorists happen and try to blow up things and use a game like CS:GO or Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes to simulate successes of counter-terrorist and law enforcement or their defeats.  I thought it’d be very clever.

Regardless, most of the history is very… historical.  MN began as an uncontacted tribe who was a sister tribe of the Aztec but failed in mostly everything, Spanish Settlers come in and settle on their way to Mexico, MN was mostly ignored as a colony and accidentally was granted independence, had a republic with a presidency, was often confused as Mexico or Cuba depending on the time period and nation, was slow to adapt new ideas, had a monarchy that later became a republic again, and during the previous century because a Fascist dictatorship who hated jews.  Mind you, there were only two jews on the island and they were retirees from Brooklyn.  They were never harmed but quietly respected, meaning when Fascists were running around yelling, “Kill the Jews!” they would quietly bow their heads in the presence of the Jewish couple and say “...except the Rosenblatts.”  Pacifism!  :D

Anyways, that fascist dictatorship was toppled by Communists.  That basically leads into today.

Almost Cuba.  More a mixture of Cuba and Mexico’s history, depending on how you see it.  So, depending on the game I should be fine.  For example, say… there is a multiplayer game based on city building for the wild west.  I’d basically be using Mexican assets if it were the wild west.  Or if it were based in the Caribbean during the cold war, I’d obviously play as the Cuban option.  And if there were a game in the early 1800’s or earlier, I’d play as either Spain or a Native Population like the Aztecs.

Well, what if it’s based in the Ancient World? I’ve settled this too.  Apart from the Aztecs (because they’re not always available), Spain and the kingdoms that made Spain would be the choice in this scenario (Castile, Leon, Asturias, etc) but in a world where the kingdoms of Spain haven’t been formed yet? The Spiritual Successor of MN is Syracuse.  An aircraft carrier has been named “Siracusa” which is the name in Spanish.  So, I’d basically be using a greek template.  If in between Spain and Greeks, I’d be using Goths (Visigoths to be specific).  I try to avoid using Rome because they tend to get associated to Fascists (thanks to Mussolini) and they’re always overpowered.  Keep in mind, most historical games tend to be either historically inaccurate or extremely warlike. Usually both. Don’t get me wrong, I like war games. Real time strategy, real time tactics, shooters and what ever else there is.  All great fun.

However, I wish there were more… peaceful games like Kerbal Space Program. Just something where I don’t need to try to destroy the other person but try to manage myself.  Tropico is a fine example, but eh. Multiplayer games tend to require conflict.  I guess I’m saying I wish there were more peaceful multiplayer games.

Of course, in the same breath, I also wish more of the violent games had a unique shtick.  For example, I think one such game that’d be fun would be a TURN OF THE CENTURY Counter-Strike.  Here me out: In Counter-Strike, you set up bombs and release hostages.  Well in the late 19th century and early 20th century, there were these political extremists known as… Anarchists!  Maybe you’ve heard of them. Here’s the thing.  They were FAR more extreme than Anarchists today.  Trust me, I used to roll with Anarchists today.  These guys would constantly explode shit, sabotage shit, even assassinate people.  They assassinated Tsars, Kings, even US presidents (as well as Non-American Presidents).  Like, the French dedicated a newspaper article dedicated to them called “The Dynamite” but in French for some reason. Now, in CS you just plant bombs or rescue hostages.  In this hypothetical scenario, the game modes should be planting bombs and maybe also hostage rescue… but also assassinations!  A nameless, NPC king or Archduke has to be protected from the Anarchists.  Maybe have NPC civilians who loiter or whatever.  Guards against Anarchists. How the game is done is really irrelevant.  It’s more a concept to expand on CS.  NPC’s of course need programming… but if done, you can run around with a hidden pistol and just shoot the nobility up close.  Have an animation where a guard pushes the nobility down and protects them with his own body.  Have an Anarchist set up a sniper position in an apartment complex and have a team of guards clear out the houses for suspected Anarchist activity. Ah… a beautiful dream, no? Programming, however, is hard.  NPC’s are just a pain in the ass to work with.  Not many games actually have decent pathfinding. However, that could be good. Anarchists should be dressed as normal civilians.  Would add to the affect, right?  Hard to spot.  The guards actually have to watch out for suspicious behavior.  Of course…  NPC’s are dumb.  So, they’ll shoot a civilian or whatever.  And you’d need them to want to NOT shoot civilians. And there could always be game mods without Civilians.  Planting bombs or whatever so it’s basically CS before WWI.  I think it’d be fun, but then again… what do I know?  :3 Anyways… yeah.  I think my original point was why do people insist on their own stats?  Like, I WORKED to get my military that high.  Pacifism just came to me.  I can understand if someone wants to do FT instead of MT (Modern Tech) but come on.  Be a little reasonable.  Like, I won’t ever imply my nation will do something if I don’t have the stats for it.  If I do have the stats for it but I don’t like the stats, then I’ll work to change it. In that regard, why don’t I just say we’re backwards and uncivilized until I reach the correct stats again?  I bitched about that a lot. The thing is, I worked for those stats.  Even if I wasn’t trying for them, I got them.  The population is one thing, but those stats… yeah.  I think they’re more influential because there is about a million nations in NationStates and MN happens to be one of them.  If those Nations were reduced to only 100 nations and all of them were placed on a ladder with the lowest percentages at the bottom and the highest on the top, I’d be the top on most the ladders.  For my military, only three other nations would be above me.  And that’s not even my highest stat. That is crazy. Of course, a lot of nations have been destroyed so I doubt there are 1 million active nations.  Really, just a lot of defunct nations with only a few thousand actually active. A lot of nations don’t use the NS Stats.  They impose their own…  Honestly, I can be fine with that.  However, when your nation becomes the Grand Duchy of Maryland-Sueberg, then you have a problem.  Overly powerful nations… they annoy me. So much so, the first war in NationStates I’ve participated in with MN was against a Constitutional Monarchy of the Puerto Rican Empire.  They were pretty Mary Suish, but they had to be replaced due to inactivity.  Thus I fought against someone else representing them. They had a 10 million man military, and my population then was far less than theirs.  Their lore was that Puerto Rico got independence and some how managed to annex some islands… then they were attacked by Cuba, Haiti, and the Dominican Republic because they were “Jealous” and thus formed a coalition and declared war… Casus Belli:  Your hat is shinier than our three hats. Dumb.  It was pretty dumb. An issue happened between PR (Puerto Rico) and MN where they basically were liberating the Bourgeoisie of MN who fled my nation as if it were the Mariana Boatlift. Um… okay?  It’s not an event I got, they declared that they sent their navy there to rescue an oppressed people. Thing is, I’m fairly certain he thought the Bourgeoisie was a race rather than a class.  Because he said people identified as being Bourgeoisie…  Sure thing.  MN is Marxist-Leninist and had a classless society, but you know what?  I rolled with it.  This was perfect. I used this intervention as a VALID Casus Belli (reason for war) and announced my intention to declare war.  We were in the same regional alliance at the time so I had to get it approved.  It was. PR… I wish they were still around.  They were top 1% in religion and had Fox News.  They were ultra right wing when I was super left wing (top 3% in Secularism due to Marxism).  We couldn’t have been more opposite.  He had unrealistic views of his nation and I had realistic goals.  However, I had this little thing that I written up earlier this year specifically for warring nations in the same regional alliance. Basically, it was what I used to declare war. Such a brilliant document outlining and trying to have a fair 1v1 tournament that used population to determine the battles required to win in game.  Normally, the defending party would choose the game but it was the first time this document was being used so… yeah. This was a practice run, basically.  They had a larger population than me so I needed more victories to beat them.  Of course, they went inactive so another nation in the region took their place and represented them. I won several and lost one.  The war was placed on hold because the prelude to this Esther mess and… well, it hasn’t really ended.  I took stats and meticulously recorded the casualties and used a random percentage to calculate the fatalities as opposed to wounded. Basically, I would have won the war so it never really mattered.

I regret it not being the REAL PR but whatever.  His replacement was fine enough.  It was more to settle a point.  If you think your nation is hot shit and your leader is this fantastic general, your arrogance will betray you.

Looking now… there was this gentleman who I had the misfortune of playing with (in Wargame: Red Dragon, same game I used in the PR War) to just test it out.  Was supposed to lead to a grand war, regional even with three vs three. Thing is, this guy was far more advanced than me in the game.  I don’t remember his stats because he seemed friendly. I was deceived.  I managed to beat him and he couldn’t be more upset. He claimed I helo rushed him when in reality, I had two helicopters in the middle of the match.  They went around the flanks and hit his spawn at the same time.  It was a coordinated effort to give my forces a break because he pushed HARD.  I was only slowing him.  By the time he realized what had happened, he sent forces back to destroy my helicopters but not much was accomplished.  I won after destroying basically everything. Thing is, he had anti-air.  But he claimed I helo rushed and I would be GLOBALLY REJECTED BY THE ENTIRE COMMUNITY IF I KEPT DOING IT!!! Yeah, well I knew what a helo rush was but I wasn’t going to confront him about it.  I asked a pretty well known player about it and he said, “Nah, not a helo rush.”  So, I’m not crazy.  He certainly was though.  Haven’t spoken to him since, seems his nation is now defunct.

Whatever.

I’m not well.  I don’t feel well.  Something in my stomach.  I feel like I should be worried.  Strange.  Today, however, shall be important.  Regardless of how I feel.  The future is mine to take. I’m going to begin Rosetta Stone today.

Everyone messaged me in the middle.  I’ve been ignored all day but the moment I get into something, everyone comes out of the woodwork. Typical.

Anyways, the previous segment was written BEFORE I took Max out on a walk.  I just came back.  A little tired. Honestly, haven’t been eating much but that shouldn’t a surprise. What is surprising is how well I’m doing on Rosetta Stone!  :D I blasted through the first three lessons on level 1 for disc 1.  The final lesson will complete the level.  So, assuming they’re divided like this in all the other lessons/levels/whatever it should take me about 3 hours per level with 4 levels per disc and they’re 6 discs… should take me a solid 3 days to go through EVERYTHING.  That’s a rough estimate, of course. Honestly, I think I sped ran it.  I was doing very well.  Of course, it was a beginning course and I did restart when the damn program couldn’t hear me.  I was sitting there yelling “WHITE!!!” as loud as I could and eventually it went through.  I mean… it’s “Blanco” but basically yelling white because blanco is white in Spanish.

Ariel is under the impression that I can speak Spanish.  I told her I couldn’t before but she’s forgotten.  I’ve allowed her to believe this for a few years now.  Doesn’t really come up.  If Spanish ever comes up, it’s so basic it’s not even worth looking up. Oof… this girl I’m talking to.  Not Ariel, another one who I’ve not mentioned.  I referenced her, but never stated her name.  I discovered she has a purity ring.  She’s a few years younger than me AND VERY attractive.  And…  I think I know why she has a purity ring.  Victim of sexual assault.  She’s had trauma she hasn’t told me about, so I know something happened. I’ll be gentle with her.  Same thing happened to Esther and Ariel.  :/ Of course, that’s something most people don’t like to reveal.  And… well, I’ve revealed it for Esther and Ariel multiple times.  I want to go back and change it, but… I can’t.  I told myself I wouldn’t in the interest of upholding the truth.  What I believe in.

Of course, you may think I’m crazy.  I’m not.  I don’t think I am, at least.  I don’t care if I’m viewed in a negative or positive light.  What does it matter?

Eh… it’s getting late.  I’m pretty tired.  It’s only 6.  I want to go to bed.  Well, if I do go to bed I’ll go to bed early… and I can wake up early.  Get started on everything.  This… may be my break.  I can finally do what I planned on doing.  Took me long enough.