#pelle!michael is a fucking thing now

[langdvnshepherd]

Hi hello I just wanted to inform you that I legit had a sex dream abt Michael pulling the whole Pelle 'do you feel held by him' line last night, so thanks for putting that nugget in my brain lmao have a lovely day mam

Oh my god @avesatanormalpeoplescareme look what we did 🤪

Honestly tho that sounds so hot my puthy is wet just thinkin abt it I’m glad the crackheadery I put out onto this site was able to give you that experience

[thebachelordiaries]

The Bachelorette: A Very Petty Review of Rachel’s Guys

The best part about reality television is judging people with no consequence.

I have no pity on these men. One will probably become The Bachelor, another will (hopefully) become Rachel’s life partner, and the rest will have an endless supply of hot chicks thirsting over them for the next three years. Yes, even Mr. Square Jaw is included in that statement.

This season of The Bachelorette has 31 men and most of them aren’t good enough to be with Rachel. I’m just being honest here. Rachel is gorgeous, smart, hilarious and has a rocking body. Boys can’t handle her, fuck boys will be destroyed by her and egomaniacs will be exposed by her.

I have so many questions for this bunch. Will this season’s villain compare to Chad? Who will get embarrassingly drunk on night one? Is it possible for these guys to create a bromance (circle jerk) bigger than Chase and Robby’s? Am I really expected to tell all these white guys apart?

WHY DO ALL STRAIGHT WHITE MEN LOOK ALIKE? UGH.

Let’s introduce ourselves to the 31 aspiring social media influencers who may or may not be vying for Rachel’s heart. This review is going to take awhile, so grab a snack.

Adam, 27, Real Estate Agent

Things were going badly out the gate after Adam called the fake-quirky white feminist Jennifer Lawrence his dream girl. The situation became a complete dumpster fire after he said the most “romantic” present he ever received was a threesome on his birthday. If anyone wants to know why I’m single, it’s because men my age consider threesomes romantic. 

Alex, 28, Information Systems Supervisor

I want to like Alex because I witnessed him put on a fantastic male stripper performance on the Ellen Show, but these answers make him sound like a wet paper bag. Alex claims to be a wingman and not a party starter, but the way he shook his ass on Ellen says otherwise.

Anthony, 26, Education Software Manager

Anthony’s answers make it seem like he is smart, funny without trying and successful. I just hope his head isn’t as weirdly shaped as it looks in this picture.

Blake E., 31, Aspiring Drummer

My first thought is, why is there more than one Blake on this season? I don’t even know one Blake in real life. My second thought is, does the occupation of “aspiring drummer” offer health insurance? Blake was engaged to a “crazy girl” for 48 hours and went to horseback riding camp when he was younger. Rachel, run. And don’t look back.

Blake K., 29, U.S. Marine Veteran

If he could be anyone, Blake would want to be “The Rock” because the famous actor looks good wearing a fanny pack. Blake also says he wouldn’t eat monkey brains or wrestle a crocodile for love. Blakey, stop trying so hard.

Brady, 29, Male Model

Yeah, Brady may be the conventionally attractive version of Casey Neistat, but that’s all he has going for him. Imagine being so ignorant to the rest of the world that the person you hate most is “The Situation” from The Jersey Shore. 

Bryan, 37, Chiropractor

I just realized these bios don’t say where these men are from. What the hell? Also, Bryan is hot, smart, AWARE OF THE REST OF THE WORLD and doesn’t have a weird-shaped head. What’s with kind-of old chiropractors never settling down? Apparently it is a thing. (This reminds me, I need to schedule an adjustment with my chiro.) I like Bryan, but he kisses and tells. On the Ellen group date he announced to everyone that he kissed Rachel already. Smh. Girls do NOT like snitches.

Bryce, 30, Firefighter

It appears that my high school english teacher was reborn as Mr. Square Jaw. Who the hell writes like this? “Laid back shot of gasoline when the fire starts to die.” “...eyes you could drown in and a smile that insults the sun.” “A fresh drink of water with a jolt of lightning.” Settle, down Nicholas Sparks. To top it all off, ABC deleted his transphobic comment after well-deserved backlash on Twitter.

Dean, 26, Startup Recruiter

There are some things I dislike about Dean, and some things I like. I dislike that he looks like an alien. I like that he called marriage an “institutionalized sham derived from religious beliefs” yet still wants to get married, because same.

DeMario, 30, Executive Recruiter

DeMario seems like strange dude. Half his answers confuse me. I feel like I had a similar reaction to him when he met Rachel on ATFR. I have one request: keep wild animals in the wild. No pet lions for you, DeMario.

Diggy, 31, Senior Inventory Analyst

This guy is funny, and evidently not a virgin (petition to get a virgin male on The Bachelorette. No, Sean Lowe didn’t count.) Several of his answers made me actually crack up, which is pretty hard to do. Sadly, I don’t think he’s marriage material at the moment. I also need him to explain this below answer further because I am jumping to some problematic conclusions here. 

Eric, 29, Personal Trainer

Ah, what would a season of The Bachelorette be like without at least one personal trainer? Eric seems like a serious dude with a type-A personality. He’s also a deep thinker and a health nut. He probably likes to act like he’s perfect, but he’s not. No one is. Your flaws will be exposed sooner or later, buddy. I’ll be watching you.

Fred, 27, Executive Assistant

I wanted to dislike Fred because he is dressed like an insurance agent in his picture, but his answers turned me around. His favorite artist is Jean-Michel Basquiat, and I believe Rachel put the same answer in her bio. Overall, his answers were 10//10. I can see him being accepted by Rachel’s intimidating father, the Hon. Lindsay. Others wouldn’t be as lucky.

Grant, 29, Emergency Medicine Physician

Grant is a doctor and kind of looks like a less-hot version of Dan Humphrey from Gossip Girl. On paper, him and Rachel would make a good couple. I can’t tell if he is good looking though, I need to see him in motion (it matters, OK?)

Iggy, 30, Consulting Firm CEO

Another “good on paper” kind of guy. I had a turtle named Iggy growing up so I really can’t get past that.

Jack Stone, 32, Attorney

What kind of name is Jack Stone? His name combined with the creepy expression he is making in this pic is not giving me a good first impression. His answers were decent. I like that he had some humility and “pleaded the fifth” on the bedroom questions. Thanks for being the only classy one.

Jamey, 32, Sales Account Executive

I know I just said this about the above person as well, but what kind of name is Jamey? That’s a name your mother calls you at home when no one is around while you’re between the ages of 6 and 12. Jamey is so far the shortest of the bunch at 5 feet 9 inches tall. He ideally would only date models and does not have female friends. I would say that I’d like to be his friend, but I have a vagina. Vaginas are for fucking, not friending. Basic Jamey logic.

Jedidiah, 35, ER Physician

Jedidiah looks like he shaved off his eyebrows and is now letting them grow back in. If you are wondering why this 35-year-old, handy, well-traveled doctor is single, look no further than the fact that he has some sort of strange obsession with wolves. All of his former dogs were more than half wolf and he has a wolf tattoo. I feel like this would be a red flag for most women.

Jonathan, 31, Tickle Monster

I hope Jonathan knows he is likely going to be put on the sex offender registry after his stint on the Bachelorette for his occupation title alone. He is divorced and likes to listen to Britney Spears and Flo-Rida. He was on the Ellen date so he, by some miracle, made it past the first night. 

Josiah, 28, Prosecuting Attorney

I hope Rachel has a thing for lawyers because ABC is really pushing them on her. Overall, Josiah seems like a good guy. Some things are better left unsaid though, like getting it on in his office at work. 

Kenny, 35, Professional Wrestler

I was hoping Kenny was an actual wrestler, but I have come to the conclusion that he is a Nacho Libre-esque performance wrestler. I am willing to put money down that he will show up in a wrestling outfit on night one. 

Kyle, 26, Marketing Consultant

I never want to hear this guy talk on television after reading his bio. These answers have gotten way too sexual for my taste. Kyle said his ex was into BDSM and he experimented with being a dom. Remember when I was shocked by the threesome answer? Things have escalated since then. He also doesn’t know what gluten is but tries to avoid it anyway. That says a lot about who Kyle is, and it’s enough for me to know I don’t want to know anything else about him.

Lee, 30, Singer/Songwriter

ABC needed to cross their T’s and dot their I’s. Personal trainer? Check. Approximately five lawyers? Check. Male model? Check. Singer/Songwriter? Check. Thank you Lee for fitting the latter demographic.

Lucas, 30, Whaboom

Lucas looks like Luke Pell if he was beaten with an ugly stick. I’m not even going to make a comment on his profession. Lucas says he would want to have lunch with a dead Bruce Jenner and an alive Caitlyn Jenner. I’m not sure if that’s how transitioning works. The person’s former self just doesn’t “die.” I do agree, however, that it would make for an interesting convo. Bruce would ask, “how’s everyone?” and Caitlyn would be like, “I ruined every relationship I had with our family. I hope that’s cool.” 

Matt, 32, Construction Sales Rep

I dig this guy even if he does have basic music taste. He has worked with inner city kids, and if he could be anybody for a day, he would be Matt Lauer, which I think Rachel would like. The craziest place he’s had sex was on a balcony of a cruise ship. I remember when I was on a cruise and all I wanted to do was make out with someone on the sun deck. Sadly the only guy who wanted to make out with me had a girlfriend, which is a metaphor for my life.

Michael, 26, Former Professional Basketball Player

Michael was a basketball player on the european pro circuit and (likely) a current crossfitter. He follows a Paleo diet, which if you didn’t know, is scientifically incorrect. Read up here, youngins. I forgot about the “former professional athlete” quota. I think we have reached our “standard Bachelorette professions” requirements but we still have about 6 more unnecessary men left. ABC is wasting my time 2017.

Milton, 31, Hotel Recreation Supervisor

The first red flag was that Milton has a tattoo inside his bottom lip, which is only cool when you’re 16. He has lived four months without power, I assume because he didn’t pay his bills (I could be wrong here.) He also wants to get “discovered” by being on this show. Last, but certainly not least, he thinks a man being romantic is emasculating. If god exists, this douche will get sent home on night one.

Mohit, 26, Product Manager

Mohit is a man of no limitations and does not let society’s demands define him. In fact, he listens to both rap and country music. Yep, you heard that right. We are in the presence of a true trailblazer.

That sound terrifying. What if the Tabasco ends up in someone’s private parts?!

Peter, 31, Business Owner

I see some grey hairs coming in, and I honestly dig it. Peter was on the Ellen date and my first impression of him was, “Fuck, he’s hot.” Peter is a former model and has finished three ironmans. He was supposed to tell a “fun” story about a one night stand but it honestly just sounded like he was date raped, so I didn’t particularly find it “fun.” (Side note: Imagine FEMALE contestants answering these questions? America would burn them at the stake.) Also, Peter, being a professional football player is not easy. How would you like permanent brain damage from numerous concussions? Didn’t think so.

Rob, 30, Law Student

Is is just me or does Rob look like Ryan Sutter? On the plus side, Rob said he has empathy, and most of the other men probably don’t understand what that word even means. On the negative side, Rob seems like someone who talks endlessly about all his worldly travels. Gag.

Will, 28, Sales Manager

Will was another guy on Rachel’s Ellen date. I don’t particularly find him attractive, but I enjoyed him on the group date and don’t really have anything mean to say about his answers. Maybe he will grow on me.

Prediction Corner

We did it, fam. We made it through all 31 contestants. I took me a couple of days, but whatever. What’s done is done.

Now that we got to know the guys, here are my way-too-soon-to-know-if-any-of-this-is-true predictions.

P.S. If you tag me or comment any spoilers on my page, take a good, hard look at your life. Why do you like ruining things for other people? Get a therapist and figure out those internal issues. Thanks. 

First Impression Rose: Bryan

First 1-on-1: DeMario

Final Rose: Fred

Future Bachelor: Alex. Or at least he’s going to become the hottest commodity to ever exist in Bachelor in Paradise. Low key want Ben to be The Bachelor again, though.

I am not going to defend any of these answers since I made them up at the top of my head. 

So there you have it. What do you think of this season’s contestants? I don’t think it’s possible that this season could be filled with more fuckboys than the last, so I will be entering Monday night’s season premiere with a positive mindset.

What contestant do you like the best? I want to know.

[flame-cat]

ender eye au- script for a thing

IDK this was part of my own au originally but i thought itd be fun to smush it in with @samijen‘s au, so here’s a scene i may or may not actually decide to use for something

Enter MICHAEL. He walks through the forest in evening, wary, hood up. He searches with a purpose. He knows RYAN has a hideaway here- he helped him build it not long ago. “For storage,” he had said. Obviously it had been a ruse. RYAN had been getting more reclusive recently. Now MICHAEL intends to find out why… and to bring him home.

He spots it. His gait doesn’t change, and he walks with a purposeful- but careful- stride to an unassuming shack made of oak and dark wood with no windows and a single door. He tries the door confidently, but finding it locked, doesn’t even blink before busting it open with a few hard rams with his shoulder. He figured RYAN might want his privacy.

Too bad.

The room MICHAEL enters is too dark to see any details. He shuffles in his pockets a bit before procuring a torch. As he illuminates the room, we see it in a panning shot, starting from the left. The left wall has an empty double chest, opened and askew. The floor is bare save a few of what look to be bits of fabric, stained in something black. From there, the center of the room is occupied by a chair and a table. The chair is overturned and one of the legs has been broken off, while the table is only slightly askew. Farther on the right wall we see a small vanity and mirror, which is smashed to uselessness and covered in the strange black substance. The vanity also contains a candle, which MICHAEL lights. From his new vantage point, MICHAEL can now see a huddled figure under the table. He cautiously approaches it before tentatively calling;

MICHAEL: … Ryan…?

Still shrouded in shadow, the figure tenses, then makes its way out from the table. It stands, and in the light of the torch, we see it is indeed RYAN. His black sweater is discarded, revealing a slightly torn and incredibly disheveled undershirt. It is sure to have been white, but is stained in the same black substance. His sleeves are torn, and in turn so are his arms, stained with blood along with the black something. His hair is pell-mell and ratty, also stained with blood and black liquid, perhaps from RYAN running his hands through it, as they are in a similar condition. His face is gaunt and exhausted, his eyes shadowed and bagged with lack of sleep. He does not hunch, however, and his face appears calm and pleasantly surprised. He idly wipes his hands on his already-stained kilt and smiles pleasantly. His right eye glows purple.

RYAN: Oh, Michael. I didn’t expect you. Sorry about the mess.

As he says this, he moves over to the chest, side-stepping the broken chair, and straightens out and closes it.

RYAN: I, ah, sorta let myself go. I hope you don’t mind.

MICHAEL: What the everliving *fuck*?

We see MICHAEL now, who removes his hood to reveal his incredulous expression.

RYAN: What?

MICHAEL: Ryan, you fucking took off without telling anyone what was going on! We’ve been worried sick! I figured you might be here, and I guess I was right, but what the hell have you even been *doing* here?

RYAN: Yeah. That whole thing. Sorry about that. You’ll understand I had to leave in a hurry. There were some things I had to take care of alone. But I’m pretty much good now, so don’t worry about it.

RYAN, still appearing mostly unperturbed, walks to the table and straightens it before glancing at the chair, mildly concerned.

RYAN: Not sure what I’m going to do about that chair, though. I’ll have to fix it at some point.

MICHAEL: Wh- what? WHAT? Ryan, do you HEAR yourself? What even- why were you under the table? What happened to the mirror? And what’s all this- *he picks up a piece of fabric, now recognizable as part of the old sweater* this black stuff?

RYAN: Oh, yeah, I sorta had some experiments and it… got a little messy. *he takes the fabric before opening the chest again and calmly tossing it inside*

MICHAEL: Woah, woah, woah. Experiments? Do those have anything to do with why you look like you’ve been mauled by a hoard of spiders? Good God, have you even slept? Or eaten? Or- ANYTHING?

RYAN: I… don’t… see why that’s really important.

MICHAEL looks a bit horrified before dragging his hand down his face and beginning to pace.

MICHAEL: Oh my God. I know you haven’t been taking care of yourself since you got your fucking eye shot out, but this is ridiculous. I’m never letting you out of my sight again.

RYAN: Oh, that might be a problem.

MICHAEL, having completely turned his back at this point, pauses and looks at RYAN again.

MICHAEL: Huh?

RYAN: See, I’ve sorta… decided to… well, I’m not going back.

RYAN continues to putter about and pick up the mess while MICHAEL gawks at him.

MICHAEL: Hang on, what? ‘Scuse me? One more time? Run that by me just ONCE more? ‘Cause from what I just heard you have utterly and completely lost whatever shit you had left and thrown it in a fucking furnace at the bottom of a dark ravine of crazy.

RYAN: Hm. Yeah, I probably have gone crazy. *he smirks to himself before shrugging* Maybe just a little bit mad, even.

MICHAEL: Is THAT what this is about?? The whole “Mad King Ryan” thing? Because if it is, this has gone WAY too far.

RYAN finally faces MICHAEL head on and looks a little serious.

RYAN: No, Michael. This isn’t about anything other than me coming to the understanding that I’m… well, I’m better off alone, frankly. I can actually THINK without being interrupted all the time. Not to mention I don’t have to hide anything from you guys.

MICHAEL: Like WHAT? Edgar? That was fucking hilarious! Creepy, but still funny!

RYAN suddenly loses his cool and is right in MICHAEL’s face, eye a-glow.

RYAN: FORGET EDGAR FOR A FUCKING SECOND MICHAEL! *he backs off, apparently regaining his composure and leaving MICHAEL shaken* I’m doing real things here. Important things. More important than you, or any of the others. And if you can’t understand that, then I have nothing to say to you.

MICHAEL, speaking like he thinks RYAN is utterly and completely insane and dangerous: Listen, Rye, I know you might be stressed out-

RYAN holds up his hand wordlessly, no longer facing MICHAEL, as an indication for him to be silent. Flabbergasted, MICHAEL obeys.

RYAN: Come on, Michael. *he holds his hands behind his back* You’ve got to understand wanting to be alone, right? You were alone for a long, long time. You know the freedom that brings, right? Not being tied to other people? You have to understand that better than anyone, Mogar.

MICHAEL: I mean… yeah, but, that was years ago now. It was lonely, and scary, and I like my life better now. I’m not “Mogar” anymore, I’m just Michael.

RYAN: But that’s not entirely true, is it?

MICHAEL: What are you… getting at?

RYAN: Mogar is still part of you. You’re still, deep down, an angry monster of a human, raised by animals. He sees how you still rip at your food with your hands sometimes, how you forget that humans do things like cook their meat and sleep in beds.

MICHAEL: That doesn’t- wait, what-?

RYAN: You’re not everything you pretend to be. No one is. They’re all just pretending. To be civilized, to be better than the monsters under the bed. But you’re all just monsters in the end. All I’m doing is helping you realize.

MICHAEL suddenly backs away, having had RYAN advancing on him through his tirade as he grows more and more serious. MICHAEL’s expression turns hard and he brandishes his torch like a weapon.

MICHAEL: Who the fuck are you?

RYAN: I’m still Ryan. But I’m BETTER than him. I’m better than he ever could hope to be. I’m better than any of you could hope to be, DREAM of being. I-

As his voice grows in volume, RYAN suddenly cuts off with a jolt that sends him to his knees. MICHAEL jumps but does not move otherwise. RYAN shakes lightly, darting his head from side to side, then looks up at MICHAEL like he’s seeing him for the first time. His eyes and expression now show the toll his body had taken, and his eyes take on a frenzied gleam, feverish, even. His human pupil is narrowed to a pinprick and doesn’t appear to want to stay in place, and his ender eye no longer glows, staying a docile and dead green. He grows more fearful and jittery at registering who MICHAEL is.

RYAN: Michael? Is it- It’s really you?

MICHAEL: Ryan? Are you okay? What’s- what’s going on? Who- what WAS that?

RYAN, almost as if he didn’t hear him: No, no, no! You can’t- you can’t BE here! He WANTs you here- you have to- you need to GO! NOW! *he jumps up and holds onto MICHAEL’s arms with a death grip, shaking like a leaf, and pleads in his face* YOU HAVE TO LEAVE! HE’LL HURT YOU! Please, for the love of God, don’t let me HURT-!

And just as suddenly, RYAN jolts again, letting go of MICHAEL. His eyes open and his ender eye is glowing again. His calm demeanor is back, and he brushes his hands off on his shirt again, appearing only slightly miffed at the outburst.

RYAN: Well, I guess that cuts our meeting off a little short.

[surrendertodaniel]

Surrender To Daniel’s Top 250 Tracks Of 2017ish (Just The List, Please)

It’s a busy world out there and you could do with a version of this list without all the jackass commentary. Below are my Top 250 Tracks of 2017ish in countdown form. Thanks for hanging out. I look forward to listening to your list.

250. Kelly Clarkson - Love So Soft (Cash Cash Remix)

249. Trinidad Cardona - Jennifer

248. Arcade Fire - Electric Blue

247. Valerie June - Shakedown

246. Rozwell Fitzroy - Block Game

245. Fickle Friends - Hard To Be Myself

244. Katy Perry featuring Migos - Bon Appetit

243. Chip - Snap Snap

242. Borussia - Kinda Love

241. Lady Gaga - The Cure

240. Sonamoo - I (Knew It)

239. Taylor Swift - …Ready For It

238. Joyride - Aunty Tracey’s Cookies

237. Carly Pearce - Every Little Thing

236. Eves Karydas - There For You

235. Vic Mensa featuring Pusha T - OMG

234. Tigertown - Warriors (St. Lucia Remix)

233. Lady Leshurr - Juice

232. Frank Ocean - Chanel

231. DYGL - Let It Out

230. Old Dominion - No Such Thing As A Broken Heart

229. Super Junior - Black Suit

228. Barenaked Ladies & The Persuasions - The Old Apartment

227. Ayo & Teo - Lit Right Now

226. LCD Soundsystem - Tonite

225. Pip Blom - Babies Are A Lie

224. Shay Lia - What’s Your Problem

223. Lauren Alaina - Doin’ Fine

222. Jachary - Yellow Vision

221. Cende - Bed

220. Waju featuring Phantom Thrett - If U Wanna

219. AOBeats & Annabel Jones - Strangers

218. CupcakKe - Barcodes

217. Aly & AJ - Take Me

216. Tyler, The Creator featuring A$AP Rocky - Who Dat Boy

215. Joe Goddard - Music Is The Answer

214. Gabrielle - Nye Joggesko

213. Amber Coffman - No Coffee

212. Diamond Platnumz, Harmonize, Rich Mavoko & Rayvanny – Zilipendwa

211. Ugly God - Fuck Ugly God

210. Royal Canoe featuring Begonia - Fussin’

209. Ah Mer Ah Su - Meg Ryan

208. Wesley Gonzalez - Piece of Mind

207. Smino - Anita

206. Hannah Jane Lewis - Raincheck

205. Mollie King - Hair Down

204. Ten Fé - Twist Your Arm

203. Charlie Worsham - Cut Your Groove

202. iLoveMakonnen featuring Rae Sremmurd - Love

201. Allison Crutchfield - I Don’t Ever Wanna Leave California

200. Drezus - Get Up

199. Aimee Mann - Patient Zero

198. Fekky x Ghetts - Call Me Again

197. Slow Dancer - Don’t Believe

196. Kiesza - Dearly Beloved

195. Cam’ron - 10,000 Miles

194. Paul Heaton & Jacqui Abbott - I Gotta Praise

193. THANKS featuring Sam Sparro - Your Man

192. Desiigner- Outlet

191. Maya Killtron - Whiplash

190. Maty Noyes - Say It To My Face

189. Tee Grizzley featuring Lil’ Yachty - From The D To The A

188. Bhad Bhabie - These Heaux

187. Sean Nicolas Savage - Opposing Truths

186. 2 Chainz - Trap Check

185. Evening Glow - Love Tonight

184. Liv Dawson - Searching

183. Bruno Mars - Versace On The Floor

182. Paramore - Hard Times

181. Ghost Twin - Plastic Ghost

180. Lao Ra featuring Konshens - Boby Bounce

179. SOB X RBE - Lane Changing

178. PIXEY - Hometown

177. Feltworth - Forget This Feeling

176. Twice - Likey

175. Craig Finn - God In Chicago

174. Axolotes Mexicanos - Trececatorce

173. Charli XCX - Boys

172. Lil Uzi Vert - XO Tour Llif3

171. Steven Wilson - Permanating

170. Promiseland - Take Down The House

169. Estrons - Strobe Lights

168. Future Islands - Ran

167. Shamir - Straight Boy

166. St. Vincent - Los Ageless

165. Maluma - Felices los 4

164. John Maus - Touchdown

163. Sharon Needles - Battle Axe

162. Stormzy - 4PM In London

161. Adult Mom - Full Screen

160. Luke Combs - When It Rains

159. HAIM - Want You Back

158. RVIVR - The Tide

157. Torres - Helen In The Woods

156. Partner - Play The Field

155. Manuel Turizo - Una Lady Como Tú

154. The Moonlandingz featuring Rebecca Lucy Taylor - The Strangle Of Anna

153. April - Mayday

152. A Boogie Wit Da Hoodie - Drowning

151. Cassius - Ibifornia (Myd Remix)

150. Kyary Pamyu Pamyu - Harajuku Iyahoi

149. Goodbye Honolulu - Typical

148. Electric Six - I’ll Be In Touch

147. DJ Khaled featuring Beyoncé and Jay-Z - Shining

146. Sløtface - Empire Records

145. Tank - When We

144. Jerry Williams - I’m Not In Love With You

143. Gothic Tropic - How Life Works

142. Girl Ray - Don’t Go Back To Ten

141. Ski Mask The Slump God - Babywipe

140. Mike WiLL Made-It featuring Big Sean - On The Come Up

139. Pkew Pkew Pkew - Before We Go Out Drinking

138. Brockhampton - Star

137. The Perfect Kiss - Broadcast (From You To Me)

136. Fishbach - Un Autre Que Moi

135. Surfbort - Back To Reaction

134. Highlight - Can Be Better

133. Dagny - Wearing Nothing

132. First Hate - The One

131. Sorority Noise - No Halo

130. Playboi Carti - Magnolia

129. Alex Cameron & Angel Olsen - Stranger’s Kiss

128. Real Numbers - Frank Infatuation

127. Rejjie Snow featuring Pell - Virgo

126. YoungBoy Never Broke Again - Untouchable

125. Kesha - Learn To Let Go

124. LOONA Odd Eye Circle - Girl Front

123. Middle Kids - Never Start

122. Kelela - LMK

121. Hey Violet - Break My Heart

120. Sean Paul featuring Dua Lipa - No Lie

119. Papooz - Trampoline

118. Lab Coast - Back To Your Future

117. Mise en Scene - Waster

116. Weaves - Walkaway

115. Aymee Nuviola - Rumba de la Buena

114. Plaitum - Ovation

113. New Swears - Dance With The Devil

112. The Regrettes - Seashore

111. Kane Strang - My Smile Is Extinct

110. Red Velvet - Red Flavor

109. Lovely Bad Things - Hiding to Nothing

108. Century Palm - King of John Street

107. Jessie Reyez - Gatekeeper

106. Jay Som - Baybee

105. YBN Nahmir - Rubbin’ Off The Paint

104. Milk Teeth - Owning Your Okayness

103. Bakermat featuring Kiesza - Don’t Want You Back

102. Jimmie Allen - Blue Jean Baby

101. FAUX - Take Back Time

100. Joey Bada$$ - Land of the Free

99. Tove Styrke - Mistakes

98. A$AP Ferg - Plain Jane

97. Astrid S - Such A Boy

96. Wax Idols - Everybody Gets What They Want

95. DeJ Loaf - No Fear

94. Hamell On Trial - Safe

93. Tay-K - The Race

92. Fazerdaze - Lucky

91. Jax Jones featuring Demi Lovato & Stefflon Don - Instruction

90. Jon Pardi - Heartache on the Dancefloor

89. Heart Attack Man - Taking Sides

88. RaeLynn - Lonely Call

87. Young Guv - Traumatic

86. Baka Not Nice - Live Up To My Name

85. John Moreland - It Don’t Suit Me (Like Before)

84. Lil Yachty - Bring It Back

83. The Drums - Blood Under My Belt

82. Amaal Mallik - Maine Tujhko Dekha

81. Jillian Jacqueline - Hate Me

80. Lizzo - Water Me

79. Joy Again - Kim

78. Yaeji - Last Breath

77. Daniela Spalla - Prometí

76. Peach Pit - Seventeen

75. Baio - Man of the World

74. Rostam - Bike Dream

73. Juiceboxxx - Freaking Out

72. Mabel - Begging

71. Bleachers - I Miss Those Days

70. The Killers - The Man

69. Dude York - Love Is

68. Pale Waves - There’s A Honey

67. TYSM - Honeymoon Phase

66. Artificial Pleasure - All I Got

65. Tei Shi - Keep Running

64. vivienxo - TTYN

63. Lanikai - Motor Inn

62. Midland - Drinkin’ Problem

61. Sam Coffey & The Iron Lungs - Talk 2 Her

60. Thundercat featuring Michael McDonald & Kenny Loggins - Show You The Way

59. Rozwell Kid - Wendy’s Trash Can

58. Jazz Cartier - Tempted

57. BØRNS - Faded Heart

56. Sigrid - Don’t Kill My Vibe

55. Leikeli47 - 2nd Fiddle

54. QTY - Rodeo

53. The Big Moon - Formidable

52. Kenshi Yonezu - Peace Sign

51. Ski Mask The Slump God - Catch Me Outside

50. Sampha - (No One Knows Me) Like The Piano

49. Danny L Harle - 1UL

48. Sälen - Heartbreak Diet

47. Iron Chic - My Best Friend (Is A Nihilist)

46. Phoenix - J Boy

45. Carly Rae Jepsen - Cut To The Feeling

44. Mozart’s Sister - Moment 2 Moment

43. Peter Perrett - An Epic Story

42. Miguel featuring Travis Scott - Sky Walker

41. Demi Lovato - Sorry Not Sorry

40. Cathedrals - Try to Fight

39. Janitor Scum & The Scums - Shopping Cart

38. ARY - Childhood Dreams

37. HMLTD - To The Door

36. KWAYE - Little Ones

35. Fitness Forever - Canadian Ranger

34. The Cornshed Sisters - The Message

33. BETSY - Little White Lies

32. Rae Morris - Do It

31. The Steves - I Feel Like Dying

30. Future featuring Kendrick Lamar - Mask Off (Remix)

29. Rita Ora - Anywhere

28. Needles//Pins - Miracle

27. Dream Wife - Fire

26. Ralph - Tease** **

25. Hall N Nash - Machine Gun Black

24. Pixx - I Bow Down

23. Starley - Call On Me (Ryan Riback Remix)

22. Dave x J Hus - Samantha

21. Charlotte OC - Shell

20. Slow Leaves - Enough About Me

19. PRETTYMUCH - Would You Mind

18. Kendrick Lamar - Humble

17. Amber Mark featuring Mia Mark - Monsoon

16. Denzel Curry - This Life

15. Breakfast Muff - RU a Feminist

14. Deem Spencer - Soap

13. ionnalee - Samaritan

12. Pristin - Wee Woo

11. Quay Dash - Decline Him

10. Confidence Man - Boyfriend (Repeat)

9. Dance Movie - Penny

8. Clairmont The Second - The Ave In You

7. MUNA - I Know A Place

6. Tierra Whack - Mumbo Jumbo

5. IU - Last Night Story

4. Tove Lo - Disco Tits

3. IU featuring G-Dragon - Palette

2. Dua Lipa - New Rules

1. Lorde - Green Light