#peat moss potting soil

[meekamaye]

To Pot or Not Pot, That is the Question

Its a hot, steamy day in Minnesota and even after torrential rains the past couple weeks, my plants need watering. The ones in pots are already setting up like cement. Today’s potting ‘soil’ has no soil in it at all. Most of them consist of sphaghum peat moss, coir fiber, perilite, vermiculite, sand, limestone, compost, compost wood chips and fertilizers. There are special soils for specialty…

[savageboar]

my new pet.

[cande-dooder]

god, I just want to sob

I looked and looked and looked and FINALLY was able to get a money tree and now it’s got root rot (pretty sure bc the trunks are getting squishy) and I’m about to move and I know the plant is going to be stressed and I’m worried that I’m going to lose my money tree. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[schistostegapennata]

can you talk about moss poaching i'm actually really curious

How can I refuse! Absolutely!!! It sounds kind of ridiculous, but it's actually very sad.

So, let's start off with some numbers. Every year, the moss black market is estimated to garner up to $165 million for trafficking approximately 82 million pounds of moss.

I cannot even wrap my mind around how much moss that is.

You might ask, why does moss poaching exist and why is it so lucrative? Well, the quality that has made mosses the prey of an illegal trade is simply their aesthetic appeal. Soft, velvety, and moist, mosses are extremely pleasant to the touch and calming to look at. Some people are willing to pay large amounts of money to collect them and put them in private gardens. However, most of the mosses that move in this underground black market are actually sold to companies/wholesalers for use in potting/gardening soil, plant nurseries, decor, and as craft materials. The majority of the preserved mosses in your run-of-the-mill chain craft store, planters, floral wreaths, or very-much-dead living wall decorations are gathered illegally, bleached to death, and then dyed green. This goes for a lot of prepackaged peat moss and soil mix blends as well.

Even though it is illegal to gather moss in public places (in the US, at least), people still harvest it. Why? Probably because there's a fair amount of money to be made and the consequences are very rarely enforced, and when they are, they are quite light--usually a $50 fine at worst if you're caught. Most of this black market moss is actually poached from the national park system, with Appalachia and the Pacific Northwest usually being the hardest hit regions.

Mosses play vital roles in many ecosystems, provide homes for threatened species, regulate water distribution in forests, and help with erosion, so their loss is a terrible blow. Additionally, moving such large quantities of mosses from one location to another may spread unwanted, invasive hitchhikers, like insects that lay their eggs in the plants, or even seeds and spores.

I'll end on this thought:

It can take 20 years for a small patch of moss removed from a fallen tree to grow back with the right moisture conditions.

How long would it take to regrow 82 million pounds?

[bogappreciation]

While you can technically call sphagnum poss "peat moss," generally when people are referring to peat moss they are referring to peat.

Peat is what happens when organic material decomposes very very slowly. Bogs build peat, because they're super waterlogged and also there's no oxygen in the soil. It takes a very long time to accumulate in large amounts and is extremely absorbent. You'll frequently find it in potting soil.

Once it's cut out of the bog and dried out, it burns similar to coal. Selling this was absolutely important to many rural economies in Europe.

Unfortunately, this is very destructive towards the local ecosystem. I live in a (non-european) area where we used to have a bunch of little bogs, and now we have a bunch of little lakes where no bog plants can grow.

nature things that a lot of people don't know about and weren't even taught about adequately, but they're actually really fundamental and important to know about

how rivers work. Where do they get started? how do they decide which way to flow?? what makes one river muddy and the other one clear?

[They flow downhill. Always. If a river is flowing a Way, that way is Downhill. They start with rain flowing or soaking downhill until it forms into a little trickle through a channel like a gully or drainage ditch, and the farther it flows the more other trickles flow into it from the land around it, until you have a stream, and the streams all flow downhill until they run into each other, and eventually you have a river which finally reaches the ocean. Rivers never flow FROM the ocean because the ocean is the most downhill you can possibly go. I don't think rivers usually split in two—a fork in a waterway is usually two rivers joining together.]

[On the subject of pollution, rain is usually supposed to soak slowly through the layer of leaves, roots, and dead plant material that covers most biomes. But if you tear up the plants and leave bare mud, or replace a forest with a muddy cow pasture, there's no filter, and mud and contaminants wash into the river. Just plain mud can be pollution.]

how soil works. What makes different soils different? Why are some soils good for growing a garden and others terrible? Does it need more fertilizer?

[The sand, silt, clay diagram is very simplified and only deals with one aspect of soil. Roots, soil animals, fungi, and dead plant material are all part of soil and affect its structure, making it spongy and full of holes and passages for nutrients, water, and new roots. Tilling can break hard soil, but tilling doesn't make soil light, fluffy, and permeable—disturbing the soil as little as possible, protecting it with a layer of plant material, and allowing the natural life forms of the soil develop their networks and tunnels and slowly break down the plant material layer does. This is also very simplified. Soil is COMPLICATED.]

what fungi are, and whether they are dangerous.

[fungi cannot harm you unless you eat them or unless they're growing inside your house and you're inhaling their spores in a concentrated space. There's like, one species in Japan that causes skin irritation. You can touch any other species without any harm whatsoever. *Most* of them don't harm your garden either—in fact, most plants connect their root systems to the fungal mycelium in the soil and receive nutrients from the fungus in exchange for the products of photosynthesis.]

Whether lichen harm trees

[no. They're just hanging out. But a LOT of lichen on a tree might be a sign that the tree is dying. It's not the lichen's fault though.]

What moss is??

[it's a plant, but a very simple plant that doesn't have any vessels for transporting water, so it has to live somewhere damp and soak it up like a sponge. There are hundreds of species of moss, and different species live on the side of a boulder vs. the top, or a living tree trunk vs. a fallen dead tree trunk!]

where bugs go in the winter? I straight up had a book as a kid that told me that they just die, without explaining how the species doesn't go extinct if the winter kills them all.

[Tl;dr they're usually hibernating in fallen leaves and dead wood and plant material. Some do this as eggs or larvae/caterpillars; in this case the adults do die, but their children sleep peacefully through the winter to awake in the spring. And still others hibernate as adults. This is why you don't clean up your flower beds until late spring.]

How Many plants there are

[WAY more than you think]

How ecosystems work apart from "everything is out to get everything else and take resources from other organisms."

[Competition and cooperation are both important in ecosystems! Weeds are competitive and they can choke out other plants, but they also protect the soil from erosion and harsh sunlight, keeping it moist and helping organic matter to build up. A lot of plants, when they're young, need to be sheltered by other plants that protect them from dryness, heat, and herbivores. This isn't even getting into how some plants will send nutrients to seedlings or to understory plants in a forest! Before industrial agriculture made monocultures dominant, people used and were familiar with cooperative relationships between plants a LOT more.]

The range of creatures that are pollinators, and how important the variety is.

[Bees, wasps, butterflies, moths, flies, ants, beetles, hummingbirds, and bats are all pollinators, and flowers are usually shaped and colored and scented to attract particular pollinators. Bees can't do everything, and honey bees are only one kind of bee. Red flowers and long tube shaped flowers are often for hummingbirds, pale-colored flowers that open at night need moths, and flowers that give off strong foul odors often attract flies. It gets WAY more complicated than that—sometimes a flower is only pollinated by a single species of bee or wasp or beetle.]

How many bees there are besides honey bees

[LOTS. And you've probably never seen most of them, if you don't regularly spend time around native plants! There are 140 species of longhorn bee alone, and most people haven't even heard of longhorn bees! There are well over a hundred bumble bees too! Bees come in bright, metallic green, blue, and pure gold. In the USA where I live, some of the most endangered bees are the adorable, fluffy bumble bees—the American Bumble Bee is threatened, and we have some species, like the rusty-patched bumble bee, that are critically endangered.]

[Please, please, please do not use pesticides on plants unless it is a necessity, and please do a LOT of research on the specific pesticide you are using and its effects on non-target insects. If there is any alternative, Do Not Do It. ESPECIALLY not pesticides that come in dust or powder form, ESPECIALLY in the USA, because regulations are so loose here that regular people can buy pesticides in dust form that are horribly toxic to bees.]

[How horribly toxic? A pesticide like Sevin dust will cling to the fuzz on every single bee that visits your plant—like pollen—and those bees will probably die. And in social bees, before they die, they will take the poison back to their hive (like pollen) and potentially kill the entire hive.]

[heavenly-fag]

24-hour minizine (8 pages) about DIY propagation from leaf and stem cuttings (free to copy and distribute!! pls just take my name out if you change any content)

EDIT: thank you for all the love! check out @contentsunderpressurezine (instagram) for more of our stuff!

pdf download for print and read friendly versions on this ko-fi I just set up! pay what you wish, free to print and distribute

plaintext under the cut:

So You Want to Make Some Plants Into Even More Plants?

A Quick + Dirty Guide to Propagation from An Amateur Who Likes Watching Roots Grow. (by Fran Tirpak)

propagation - n.

"multiplication or increase, as by natural reproduction."

1. Prepare!

Important: Sterilize your shears w/ rubbing alcohol.

Wear gloves -- some plants can irritate your skin when cut.

Gather supplies: shears, gloves, soil medium, pot, glass jar.

Optional: plant food, rooting hormone, cinnamon, tealight.

^ we'll talk about these all more later on.

2. Take your cutting!

Succulents -- just pop off a leaf!

Vining plants (Pothos, Monstera), cut below one of the root nodes.

Woody stems (fiddle leaf, rubber plant) -- cut with 1-3 leaves at the top

3. Root your cutting!

(Optional) Dip the cut end in rooting hormone. For a homemade method, dip in cinnamon, then seal with melted wax from an unscented tea candle.

Place the cutting in a glass of warm water in indirect sunlight.

Succulent owners: simply place your leaves flat on damp potting soil.

4. Plant the cutting

(the scariest part)

Once the cutting has roots (~3-4 weeks later) time to put it in soil.

Depending on your plant, your soil needs will change.

When in doubt: good drainage, airy & loose, added nutrients.

For tropicals: 1/2 peat moss or coco coir, 1/4 perlite or pumice, 15% orchid bark, 10% compost/organics (i.e. worm husks).

(For succulents, just watch 'em sprout!)

* Potting Tips

Experiment with lighting and humidity levels.

Try out LECA or a mix to slowly introduce your plant to solid ground.

LECA: Lightweight Expanded Clay Aggregate. Balls of clay used in hydroponic gardening - popular with Monsteras

Some tropical plants also have no prob being in water full-time!

5. Now you have a friend!

Pro tips: You can take props from anywhere (as long as you're responsible -- and sneaky).

There's no one way to care for a plant. Do your research, go with your gut, & have fun!

[mishhty]

Monstera deliciosa 🪴

Information -

Kingdom: Plantae

Order: Alismatales

Family: Araceae

Genus: Monstera

Species: M. deliciosa

Monstera deliciosa, the Swiss cheese plant or split-leaf philodendron is a species of flowering plant native to tropical forests of southern Mexico, south to Panama.It has been introduced to many tropical areas, and has become a mildly invasive species in Hawaii, Seychelles, Ascension Island and the Society Islands. It is very widely grown in temperate zones as a houseplant.

It is called Swiss Cheese Plant due to their natural leaf holes. The Monstera plant's scientific name, Monstera deliciosa, derives from the Latin words "monstrum" meaning "monster" and "deliciosa" meaning "delicious."

Monstera plants are natural detoxifiers. Their broad leaves absorb and strip away indoor air toxins. The ideal temperature it requires is around 70°F. With a little humidity added to that, they get to feel right at home. Monsteras need bright light but do not tolerate direct sunlight. They can survive in low light, but their growth will be inhibited. To grow a striking Monstera plant with the lacy leaves and the coloration you adore, you need to provide it with good light. Monstera prefers bright indirect light. Keep out of direct sunlight for extended periods, as it can burn the leaves.

It is safe to come into skin contact with Monstera soil, foliage, and stems. However, it is not safe to ingest any part of the plant. Monstera is mildly toxic to humans and is toxic to cats and dogs but is not considered lethal. All parts of the plant are harmful to ingest except the fully ripe fruit, which rarely develops on indoor Monstera. The toxicity comes from insoluble oxalate crystals in the juices inside the plant. Indoor Monstera Deliciosa doesn’t yield fruits.

In various cultures, the Monstera has been a beacon of good luck, protection, and prosperity. It also fills spaces with positive energy and attracts good luck, according to Feng Shui.

Tips to grow and maintain Monstera:

Light: The plant thrives in bright and indirect light. It is advisable to keep it on a windowsill that receives good amount of indirect sunlight. Direct sunlight may burn its leaves. Note, if you find the leaves have small or no holes, then it means that the plant is not getting adequate light.

Soil:Use soil that retains moisture. Peat moss, perlite, and compost helps in the plant growth.

Watering: Ensure that Monstera Deliciosa is planted in a pot with good draining facility. The right time to water the plant is when the soil looks dry at the top. Note, overwatering may lead to root rot. During summers, the plant needs water regularly, however decrease the frequency of watering during winters.

Humidity: This plant grows well in humid conditions. You can mist its leaves or place it in a water tray having pebbles to increase the humidity level around it.

Temperature: Monstera Deliciosa grows well between 18°C and 29°C.

Support: As Monstera Deliciosa is an understory plant with aerial roots and large leaves, it needs support to grow.

Pruning: Prune the plant to maintain its shape. Remove yellow or damaged leaves so that the plant grows well.

Propagation: Monstera Deliciosa can be propagated through stem cuttings that can be rooted into water or directly planted into soil. You can also choose the process of air layering that involves creating a root system in a mature stem when it is still attached to the mother plant. Once roots are developed, the stem can be separated.

[chokrihizem]

🍓🌱 Excited about growing your own organic strawberries right at home? 🌱🍓

Did you know you can grow delicious, pesticide-free strawberries even if you have limited space? 🍓🌿 Container gardening is the perfect solution! 🌞🏡

👩‍🌾👨‍🌾 Whether you're a seasoned gardener or just starting out, here are some tips for growing juicy strawberries in containers:

1️⃣ Choose a sunny spot: Strawberries love sunlight! Place your containers where they'll get at least 6-8 hours of direct sunlight daily.

2️⃣ Pick the right container: Opt for large containers with drainage holes to prevent waterlogging. Terra cotta or plastic pots work well.

3️⃣ Use quality soil: A well-draining, nutrient-rich soil mix (like compost and peat moss) is ideal for strawberries.

4️⃣ Planting time: Spring is perfect for planting strawberries. Space your plants about 8-12 inches apart to allow room for growth.

5️⃣ Watering and feeding: Keep the soil consistently moist, but not waterlogged. Feed your strawberries with organic fertilizer every 2-3 weeks.

6️⃣ Pest control: Keep an eye out for pests like slugs and birds. Netting can protect your berries while still allowing sunlight in.

➡️ Want to read my full article: How to Grow Organic Strawberries in Containers!

🎉 Growing your own strawberries is not only rewarding, but also a delicious way to enjoy fresh, organic fruit all summer long! Have you tried growing strawberries in containers? Share your tips and experiences below! 🍓💬

[makoredeyes]

Itty bitty baby Ginko Biloba sapling I started from seed about 18 months ago graduated into a bonsai training pot today mostly because I cannot focus on anything else and even though it had plenty of room in the 4” pot it had it was still in its peat moss seed starting media still and having some real soil will be good for it (helloooo nutrients!)

I was really shocked at how tiny it’s roots are for something that’s had significant growing time at this rate, especially compared to the canopy. I’m not sure if this is typical of Ginko or a product of not having very good soil so far, but it seems healthy and happy overall anyway. They’re tough trees.

(That’s it, that’s all it has for roots)

I also suspect the seed wasn’t very good. It was one of 5 I started and the only one to germinate, when they’re easy enough that if they were sent to me healthy they should have all gone no problem. But here’s the one! I have other bonsai experiments going outside (with mixed results, all looking particularly haggard rn or maybe dead idk yet because of some terrible heatwaves) so no pictures of those, but this little one is so young and tiny it lives inside in my kitchen greenhouse window where I can keep a very close eye on it.

(I gave it a friend cx )

I decided to take the time to clean up the window just a little so y’all can see I uh.

Like plants. And have a few.

Finding the poor little Ginko is like playing Where’s Waldo 😅

[eggxeggxegg]

Im trying to become a better plant parent so I’m going to get a few doodads

Sol soil chunky potting mix - seems like a good peat moss free potting medium to have

Diatomaceous earth - because I think one of my plants has fungus gnats

Cinnamon - to try and get rid of the fungus in the soil that’s causing the fungus gnats

Leca balls - as a soil chunkifying additive

[landofspaceandrainbows]

Thanks to @flashfictionfridayofficial for the prompt!

~

"Special delivery!" Wels called. He entered the little capsule in the cave, removing his breathing mask as the seal closed on the door and just getting a faint taste of sulfur on his lips. X hugged him and traded a cup of coffee and a stack of hardtack and jerkey for a new map and a little present wrapped in a ribbon. The "present" was a little soil and peat moss filled pot tied with a bow.

X cupped it, he set the pot of greenish fungus on the table, and watched as X arranged the beginnings of a tendril to climb the door frame. "Low water and sun needs, nice!"

"But you do seem to like cutting the schedule awfully close."

"Eh, no worries, I know how we take turns, I've just gotten sharper, and better at side trips. And we've got enough bread and water now." He added the latest and the map to his pack in the corner.

"Well, off to go Searching again." He continued, sliding on his now full sack, the coal-silk light and sturdy against the heavy load. He wandered upwards in the cave until he came to a new marker on the rock, a new part of the ruins, and a new slick warping of the air.

[artificial-condition]

Finished filling the new raised bed!

I mixed compost, peat moss, potting soil, vermiculite, perlite, and zeolite to make the soil. I might top it off with more compost later :)

[proudheron]

this pot of chrysanthemums blew into my driveway last november, just a dry clump of stems and peat moss. i threw the cracked plastic pot away and left the soil to compost in place next to the hostas. dead leaves, snow, and ice covered it, and i forgot about it, until in april i noticed leaves growing.

so i gave it a new pot and some fresh compost and put it on the front steps to get some sun. the leaves steadily grew all summer, and when i noticed buds in late august i was so excited to see what colour they would turn out to be. the first one bloomed today!

[oddman-the-oldman]

If you start from the idea that I’m quite insane this will all fall into place.

Darlingtonia for all its innocent appearance is really a muscle plant and left unsupervised for too long it will break out of its pot and run amok, terrorizing all the villagers for miles around. I remembered to take the first picture when the pot was 1/2 empty already but that is ok because only about 1/2 of this plant is going to survive this experience, I’ll be up sizing the pot they are in and there will still be  to much to  fit into the new pot. My potting medium is 2 parts perlite, 1 part vermiculite. If you want an acid buffer 1/2 part Peat Moss is optional. Measurements are by volume and approximate. I buy a pot without any drainage holes so I can install my own just a little more than  1/2 way up the side of the pot from the bottom or about 7 inches from the top rim of the pot which ever is less. The plants are easier to care for if they have a large reservoir to draw water from.

So these are the candidates for survival. The next step is to groom the candidates of all dead leaves.

As each plant is groomed I set it  in the  top of the new pot it will be moving into until the  pot is +/- full

Once I have enough plants to satisfy my evil intentions I start pouring potting mix around the plants and water everything in well.

So these plants are on death roe. When I was 40 I would have potted them up in 1 and 2 gallon pots and sold them for $10.00 and $20.00 at a place I know in  Seattle 

Most of them are already in the compost bin. I’ve left a few in a bucket of water on the off chance I can give them away but chances are no one I know will want them.

Tomorrow I have to mix some Drosera soil and plant my Aussie’s ( Drosera binata )

. 

[pbandjesse]

It is confusing my body that I have work tomorrow. Having Monday's off has been such a thing that it feels weird that I'm going to camp tomorrow. But even more it feels weird that other people will be there! Because camp is starting!

I have tried very hard to enjoy my day off. Me and James stayed up late talking and laughing and hanging out. It was a really nice evening and I would sleep really well. And I got to sleep in.

I woke up at 9 and I could have kept sleeping but I wanted to get up. I would go get washed and dressed. I felt pretty. It was going to be pretty sunny and warm but I had much to do!

I would feel a little dazed today. I don't know why. I feel very introspective and quiet. It's interesting for sure.

I would go downstairs and had a little breakfast. I had a toasted cinnamon raisin English muffin with butter. And gathered myself to go out.

My whole plan today was to get the supplies to build Crabcake's outdoor enclosure. I had a few ideas but I'm very happy with my final decision.

But I was getting frustrated. I would start my day out by going to five below to look for bar soap for camp. I have one but I wanted a backup. No luck though?? No soaps at all at that location.

I would get a blind bags and a snack. But then I was off. I walked across the parking lot to target. I would try our soda stream liquid there. And looked around at the clothes but I didn't want or need anything. I paid and went to my next stop.

Over to the Petco. I wanted to get a better hearing bulb. Which was a little confusing but I think I got a good one. Ceramic heating bulb. I would also get a hide and some extra food pellets and dried flowers for snacking. I had a nice conversation with the cashier. On my account Crabcake's name is Frank. But in talking to her it has been decided that his name is Crabcake Franklin Lentzwiler the first.

I would try to go to ace hardware next. But I kept having to drive in circles because of all the one way streets. I was struggling. I did finally make it inside but they didn't have anything I needed for my idea. So I felt dumb for all the driving in circles.

I would go to Aldi next. This Aldi did not have as many things as the Lidil did the other day. Disappointing but not surprising. It's funny how nice some of the Aldi and lidils are while other are so bare bones and you literally never know what you're going to get.

So I went to my final stop. I drove to Home Depot. And it wasn't perfect but it would work out in the end.

I was very frustrated when I could not find a staff member to help me. I found the tub I wanted but I couldn't safely pick it up off the pile without knocking everything over. But I circled the garden center 3 times before I gave up and went inside the main store and I found someone. And was like hey I know that it isn't your section but can you help me get something and he was surprised no one was available in the garden section but he was really kind and came and helped.

I would get two bags of peat moss topsoil, which is what was recommended online for tortoises. And then I chose a yellow flower plant and an egg plant plant a low dish and a terracotta pot. I was pretty happy with my choices.

The line took a long time. I chatted with the girl in front of me. She was super excited about my plan to make an enclosure garden for a tortoise. I was also very excited.

I paid and they offered to load the car for me but I decided that since I needed to get it all out of the car I should put it in myself. The guy thought that was funny.

I'm glad I did that though. Nothing was actually heavy it would just be a lot of thinking and moving things around.

I went home and got a parking space right in front of our door. Excellent. I came inside and put Sweetp in the basement. And brought everything inside.

I let Sweetp be free while I was working on setting up the tub. I had decided to get the tub without a bottom and so I would put a tarp down first. I used the two bags of top soil to cover that and then the two blocks of coconut fiber. I soaked everything and got it all mixed and set up and was pretty happy.

Both plants were pretty badly root bound. I had to chop some off of the flowers just to get it to break apart a bit. Pretty annoying. I really hope they don't die.

I got them planted and put in the other things I got. I filled the soaking tray. I half buried the pot as a hide. And I placed the log I got. It was time to introduce the boy.

Crabcake had been out when I left earlier. And he was still hanging out when I went to get him.

He is so stinking cute. I think this may have been the first time he was really outside. Born in captivity and such. So he seemed a little nervous when I put him in the tub but he has been exploring and hiding in the flowers and I am really excited that he seems happy in there. I want to grow chia for him to eat in there. I still need to figure out predator protection but for now, as a supervised activity I think it is all good.

Once I was done setting up and I had wash all the dirt off of my hands I would set up our camp chair out there and put the umbrella over it. I made nachos and set myself up to watch TikToks and eat my little lunch.

James asked me to water the plants so I did that. And sat down to eat. I opened my blind bags. Got a small dog dressed like a sorcerer named Justin. It was a good day.

I eventually got a little to hot and would move inside. I would go outside to check on Crabcake and Sweetp often. But I would also just hang out and eat snacks. It was honestly lovely. Though I got very sleepy.

James would come home at 5. And I would show them my hard work. I had asked them earlier in the day if we could go out to buy a porch swing this evening. And so after they changed their shirt and we brought all our animals inside, we would go out into the world.

We did not have luck at the first store. Disappointing. We still got a few small things. Pastries. We had to go to the Lidil I went to the other day. And they would have it! Amazing! James was very strong and carried it to the car. I was very happy.

But very quickly I fell apart. Callie let me know that some boys are trying to get the block house we want. Which upset me. And then we got to Mathews for dinner but they were out of pizzas??? I was so disappointed.

James pivoted and is still trying to cheer me up. We went to get pizza somewhere else but then their soda was flat and my stomach hurt so much and I was so upset. And it was worse that I knew I was being irrational. But I just feel all out of sorts.

I'm hoping eating helps. We are almost home. Where I will eat and try to be normal again. I was having a really good day and I would like to continue that.

Especially because I am very excited for camp tomorrow. I hope it's a really good day and I get a lot done.

I hope you all have a great night tonight. Take care of eachother. And be safe. I love you all. Goodnight!!

[lovedrunkheadcanons]

Chapter Contents

(Arranged Marriage Pic) Read on AO3 

Rated M 

Hannah waited for the little honeybee to lap up the rose pollen on her finger, its velvety yellow body tickling her skin as it licked and buzzed. After a minute or so, the task was finished, and bidding a fond farewell, the little honeybell turned herself around, flicked her small antennae at the generous human in thanks, and flew off.

“You’re welcome,” Hannah chimed as the insect departed, possibly returning to her hive with the saddlebags of fresh pollen clinging to her legs.

Honeybees were such amazing creatures; Never stopping, never tiring, hurrying from one pollen-filled bloom to the next. Unafraid of new opportunities. Hornets and wasps, however, were mean spirited and highly aggressive, as were German dark bees and the African “killer” bees. Common bumblebees were often mistaken for their honeybee cousins, but were not the same in both size and mannerism and could not produce honey. Other honey-less, distant relatives included ants, sawflies, and the noblest of all hymenoptera, the praying mantis, but none worked harder, nor carried as much environmental importance as the honeybee, which was why Hannah loved them so. The same golden insect emblazoned all over St. Peter's Baldachin and who’s wax was used in making Paschal candles were a gardener’s best friend. It was said that a single bee colony could pollinate close to 300 million flowers in a day, meaning if there were no honeybees - or bees in general - there’d be no flowers. If there were no flowers, there would be no flower gardeners. If there were no gardeners the world would be a much darker and less beautiful place. Crops would fail, as would roughly ¾ of all flowering plants without some sort of human intervention. Not good.

For this reason, Hannah's affection for the honeybee was insatiable. They could do no wrong in her eyes and not once had she been stung. Mother Nature’s little helpers.

Having done her good deed for the day, Hannah wiped her hands over her dirty overalls, put her gloves back on, and picked up her gardening shears and disinfectant wipes. The roses weren’t going to trim themselves.

Last week was spent tirelessly transplanting the roses from Jujutsu High to the Gojo estate. These were the same roses she had planted her first week; the night she was attacked from returning to her dorm after dark. Hannah had woken before sunrise carting the wheelbarrow and a shovel. Finally August, the rose shrubs were now rose bushes and had prospered beautifully in their foreign environment, taking on a deep reddish-purple hue reminiscent of merlot. To minimize any damage she might incur, Hannah surgically dug a moat around the thorny rose shrubs with the shovel, avoiding the delicate root hairs, and used her gloved hands to (again very carefully) unearth each prickly rose bush from the soil. Technically, it was not advisable to transplant roses in the middle of summer when the flowers were beginning to bloom and the sun was at its hottest. They were also covered with leaves and very heavy (for her). Hannah worried the whole procedure would stress the plants, causing them to go into “transplant shock,” but these were no ordinary roses. They would endure, and once all six roses had been successfully uprooted, she enlisted the help of Mr. Aoyama to wheel them up (yes, all the way up) the hill to the house.

They had placed the bushes in their own individual pot. Hannah’s homemade compost wasn’t ready. So she bought a light soilless mixture made of peat moss and perlite instead. Excellent for retaining moisture, yet allow for water to drain properly from the drilled holes at the bottom of the containers. In the end, the hardy roses not only survived the shocking ordeal, but thrived, their ruffled petals blooming like plumage, untraumatized by the event. They weren’t going anywhere. If the attracted honeybees were any indicator.

Hannah ran a disinfectant wipe over the blades and went back to trimming, cutting at a clean forty-five degree angle right above where the stem met another leaf. The clipped rose was then transferred to a water bucket with the others. So far, she had enough roses to make a bouquet for the English dining room. They hardly ever ate in there, but the wine-colored flowers would pair lovely with the oak furnishings.

She began humming a tune. A shadow eclipsed her as she clipped another rose off its stem. She felt a weight land on her braided crown, something like lips and a nose.

“Why’re you doing that?”

Hannah didn’t have to look up to know who it was, not that his voice didn’t give him away. Lately, Satoru liked perching his head on top of hers as a way of grabbing her attention.

“To clean the shears,” she answered, showing him the shears and wipes, his head staying nestled where it was. “Roses are prone to infection, so it’s best to sanitize the blades after each use.” She held up the freshly cut rose for him to take. “Here, smell one.”

Satoru took the multi-layered rose, aware of the thorns, and drew it to his nose. His brows shot straight up. “Woah.” The smell was so sweet and fruity he could literally taste it on his tongue, forcing him to comically choke down a cough.

Hannah tried suppressing a giggle. “Intense, isn’t it?”

The Six Eyes wielder nodded, blinking a few times. “Boy, you’re not kidding.” He cleared his throat and held the fragrant bloom to his nose once more, taking a more moderate whiff. The deep burgundy petals felt velvety soft on his skin. “Smells almost like candy.”

Hannah's smile widened. “These roses were a gift to me from Sister Edith before I came here.”

“Sister Edith,” Satoru mused in thought, rose still pressed to his nose. “You’ve mentioned that name before. Who was she again?”

“She was my Japanese instructor during my stay with the Sisters of St. Horatia. Every word I’m speaking to you is because of her.”

“Ah, now I remember. Sounds like she was quite the lady.”

“Of course. The best.”

“You must miss her then.”

Hannah’s smile slipped a crack. “Very much so,” she spoke somberly, running her hands over the rose petals in her lap. “Edith was fluent in almost every language you could think of, from Greek to Juǀʼhoan. I’ll probably never see her again, circumstances being what they are.”

Satoru’s brows furrowed. “How come?”

Hannah snipped off another rose. “The Sisters of St. Horatia is a cloistered order. They’re not permitted to leave the convent.”

“Wait, for real? Like ever?”

She turned to nod solemnly. “Like ever.”

“That’s a little extreme, don’t you think?”

“It’s the life they chose, Satoru.” Hannah rested the rose on her lap. “The Sisters of St. Horatia are unique in that they’re archivists. They specialize in preserving and interpreting ancient texts. Magical texts. It’s believed their library holds some of the West’s oldest sorcerery. Mother Superior oversees the whole operation.”

“Mother Superior?”

“The abbess,” Hannah said. “In convents, the head nun in charge is called ‘Mother Superior.’ I don’t know what her actual name is. She’s tied closely to the Association and was tasked with facilitating where I went as a child, including my education.”  

Satoru’s face perked up. “Oh right, that's what I wanted to talk to you about.”

She stared blankly at him. “You want me to join a convent?”

“Wha — No.” He seemed partially offended. “Why would I want you to join a  — ”

“Relax, silly. I’m teasing,” Hannah said, perhaps a little too happy he took the bait. “Married women aren’t allowed to join convents. As soon as they saw our marital records, I’d be swiftly booted out.”

“Oh.” Her husband’s shoulders drooped. “Well, I wanted to get your thoughts on something. See if you might be interested.”

“Sure, but can you give me a moment to finish with these? I’m almost done.”

Satoru eyed the bouquet of roses she was assembling. “Anything I can do to help?”

Hannah stopped her pruning and thought for a moment. “Actually, now that you’ve mentioned it….” She leaned over and patted the large rose pot in front of her. “I’d like to move this one up to the house, but it’s too heavy. Think you could lend a girl a hand, Mr. Muscles?”

Satoru issued her a mock salut. “Ma’am, yes ma’am,” and rolled his shoulders, biceps and triceps rippling under his shirt. “Watch and be amazed, kiddos. Mr. Muscles is gonna show you how it’s done.”

Topped with heavy soil and plant, the large clay pot weighed well over a hundred pounds. It would’ve easily taken two average-sized people to lift, but Satoru managed the feat on his own no problem, a testament to how strong he physically was. Hannah had seen him bench press twice his usual body weight with workout equipment. Yet she stayed close behind as he hobbled to the house, awkwardly carrying the pot, for fear he’d throw out his back. She didn’t realize she’d been holding her breath until he stationed the container near the stairs leading up to the porch. Hannah nodded. This new spot would do nicely.

“Woo, that was good,” Satoru said, wiping the sweat off his brow and looked up at the sky. “Sun is brutal today.”

Hannah agreed. It had grown considerably hot since lunch. Deciding to take a break from the summer sun, the couple collected the clipped roses and walked back inside the house to the reception hall. There on the center table was a glass pitcher filled with ice water, two cups, two damp towels for each to cool off with, and a vase to put the roses in. Makoto sure was sneaky.

“So,” Hannah said, after finishing her first glass of ice water. “What is it you wanted to talk about?”

Satoru ran one of the cool towels over his neck and chin. “Tsumiki and Megumi’s school evaluations came in.”

Hannah poured herself another glass. “And the verdict?”

He put the towel down and smirked. “Take a look for yourself.” She observed him reach inside his back pocket and pull out two opened envelopes. Curious, Hannah walked over and took them from him, re-opening each and laying the contents on the table for a better look.    

Japanese primary school evals (from first to sixth grade) were assessed by a three-tiered rank system (1,2,3), with 1 indicating the student “needs effort,” and 3 indicating the student’s grasp on the subject was “satisfactory” or higher. Hannah eyed the two report cards, noting how Tsumiki scored nothing below a 2 (“almost satisfactory”) with Music, Social Studies, and Japanese being her best subjects. Megumi also received high marks. The lowest he scored was a 2 in Music and English, with Mathematics, Science, Sports (and surprisingly enough, Art) all scoring a 3.

Below the subject lines were the behavior evaluations where teachers listed the students' cooperation in class, both towards staff and the other children. Hannah skimmed those parts, but caught the underlined text “gets into fights” on Megumi’s page. Perhaps she would ask about it later, though overall she was pleased by the outcome. 

“See, I told Megumi he had nothing to worry about,” she laughed. “He did well, and from the looks of it, so did Tsumiki.”

“Tsumiki’s scores are always good,” Satoru said. “But Megumi? His English scores? I’ve never seen them stay above a 1. It’s the only subject he struggles with on top of socializing. These are his marks now.” He revealed to her two other evaluation cards, placing them next to the newer one on the table. “And these were his marks from December and March.”

Hannah examined the older evaluations. His grades looked relatively the same, except for English, which showed a glaring 1 printed in the center box on each. His new score was 2. Megumi had improved his grade by a full number in the course of a single semester.

“Any chance you had something to do with it?” Satoru added slyly.

Hannah looked up. “I didn’t do much,” she said, shaking her head. “He understood the basics. All he needed was someone to explain them better.”

Butterflies swarmed her stomach as his lips came together, grinning so wide it seemed almost maniacal. “Good, that’s exactly what I wanted to hear.” Hannah blinked at him confused for a moment, but then he explained his reasoning. “I had a meeting with the school board this morning. Jujutsu High, that is.”

“Yes, I remember you telling me. How’d it go?”

He gave her a wink. “The wait is officially over. You, my dear Hannah, are looking at Jujutsu High’s new hire.”

Hannah’s eyes widened. “Really? They gave you the teaching job?” Satoru nodded and a beaming smile soon appeared on her face. “Oh Satoru, congratulations. That’s wonderful news. I’m happy for you.”

Her husband bashfully scratched his head. “Thanks. My first day won’t be till next year, so there’s still time, but that’s not all.” He lifted a finger, tapping her lightly on the nose. “The department will also be in search of a new English teacher soon.”

Her smile faltered. “An English teacher?”

“Yeah.” Satoru walked over and situated himself down on one of the cushions, leaning his elbow on the table. “Seems the current one is looking to throw in the towel. To be honest, I don’t know much about him - cause yours truly tested out of English freshman year - but apparently he’s been teaching English since the late Cretaceous or whatever, and during the meeting he asked if we knew anybody interested in filling the role,” he pointed at her, “and I said you.”

“M-Me?” Hannah squeaked.

He nodded. “Yeah, you.”

A couple seconds ticked by, the news of this proposal slowly sinking in.

“You’re joking.”

“No, I’m not joking.”

“You think I could teach English at Jujutsu High?

“If you wanted to,” he caveated.

“And the school board wouldn’t mind? Spouses working together, I mean.”

“I don’t see the harm.” Satoru shrugged. “It’s not like English and Jujutsu orbit in the same circles.”

“Why would you mention my name, Satoru? I don’t have a uni degree or a teaching certificate.”

“Neither do I,” her quickly husband rebutted. “I never went to university. The only certification I have is a high school diploma.”

“But that’s still more than I have. And my Japanese citizenship hasn’t been finalized. Won’t that hinder things?”

Satoru waved his hand. “Naw, we’ll find our way around that crap. We do it all the time.”

“Then what of the estate? If we’re both busy teaching, who’s going to run it? Makoto can’t juggle the work all by herself.”

“The estate is busy now because I’ve been putting off renovations for years. Once those are completed things’ll start to die down.”

“I have no credentials, Satoru,” Hannah pleaded, hammering the message home. “No references. No formal education. I don’t even know the first thing about preparing lectures or grading papers, and this would be high school level English, not sixth grade. My public speaking skills are rubbish. I’ll make a complete fool of myself in front of everyone.”

“No, you won’t,” Satoru assured, taking her hands. “I’ll be here to help. Plus, you’ll have a year to prepare, and Jujutsu High’s enrollment has been on the decline for decades. The classes shouldn’t exceed more than a handful of students at most.”

“But what if someone else needs the job?” Hannah kept lamenting. “Someone with experience who’s better qualified. I’d be selfishly taking the opportunity away from them.”

“Then that’s their loss,” Satoru tisked, rolling his eyes. “Don't get me wrong, Princess, I admire your compassion - love it even - but we gotta strike while the iron is hot here. Nobody is gonna shame you for being ambitious every once in a while. The reason I’m asking is because I think you’d be right for the job. Give you something to do besides loafing around the house all day making flower arrangements,” he tucked a strand of loose auburn hair behind her ear, his new favorite habit, and tilted her chin up to look at him as his voice grew soft. “Can’t have those good brains go to waste now, hmm?”

Hannah looked away, a flush forming on her cheeks. “Flower arranging isn’t ‘loafing around,’” she pouted, crossing her arms. “I've been outside since dawn.”

She felt Satoru bridge the gap between them, wrapping her in his embrace.

“Look,” he sighed defeatistly in her hair. “Forget I said anything. It’s obvious you're not interested.”

Rather than push him away, Hannah leaned more into him, resting her head comfortably on his chest. She felt so safe there, entranced by the steady rhythm of his heart. “I never said I wasn’t interested,” she mumbled into his cotton tee. “I’m simply questioning how it would work.”

“Oh, it would work,” he chuckled deeply, chest rumbling under her cheek. “I’d make it work.”

“You shouldn’t use your position to land me a job, Satoru. It’ll be seen as corrupt.”

“Hey, there’s gotta be some perks to being me,” he joked. “Not like I’d have to say much. You’re from England, the frickin’ motherland of English. What other credentials would they need?”

“A lot.”

He laughed and undid her braid, combing his fingers through her long shiny hair. She didn’t tell him no because it felt nice. “Just tell me you’ll think about it, okay?” he said. “Pretty please with a cherry on top?”

“But what about — “

“Nope, no more buts.”

“But I — “

“Access denied.”

“Satoru.”

“Satoru is unable to take your call at this time. Please leave a message and he will get back with you after this obnoxiously long beep. Beeeeeeeeeee…. ”

Hannah slumped and let out the smallest exhale, thus giving up the fight. “Fine, I’ll think about it.”

He paused mid-beep.

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Yay!” He hugged her closer, lifting her off the ground and swaying back and forth. “Knew you wouldn’t let me down, Princess. I knew it, knew it, knew it.”

Hannah couldn’t help but smile. Cheek smothered against him, he placed her back on the ground, allowing her to tilt her head up.

The Six Eyes were like twin spheres of blue abalone, shining down at her. She could see every shade and tint; turquoise, chalcedony, larimar, the sky and sea. How she adored looking at his eyes. They were none of this world. Magnetized, she found herself standing on her tippy toes, lips soft and pliant, wanting to be nearer. Words needn’t be exchanged. Satoru got the message and lowered his hands to her hips. Gravity became weightless as he propelled her upwards again, bringing their mouths together, her body melting into his sweet kiss.

It was good they had these moments to fall back on because the next few days would not be as kind. This was but the calm before the storm.

Rougher waters lay ahead.

Chapter Contents