#paz is a key example of maternal grief

[dirtytransmasc]

If Paz was magically revived, how would she feel about recom Quaritch, or Spider getting a new family

I think theres actually a chance of her coming back as a recom, so thinking about this really interesting.

she knows human miles, she knows the cold, violent, man who had lost his humanity. she didn't know her son, he wasn't more than a babe when she died, but she couldn't help but feel robbed, that was her baby, she was his mother.

she also knows she hold no claim to him, its been 16 years she's been dead, probably charred up and sunbleached by now. he doesn't even know who she is, outside of maybe a name, basic paperwork information, a photo if she's really lucky.

I think if she met quaritch, she'd spot the differences easily. He's soft, his eyes don't blaze with anger, his body is looser, a smile graces his face more often. he's not the man she remembers. he barely recognizes her, which she takes no offense to, considering she only recognizes his blue ass cause of the photo she saw amongst the recom files. when she asks about her son, he corrects her that its no longer miles, its spider now. he doesn't give her room for argument, says he doesn't and hasn't known the name miles for years, and that he won't force it on him. so he's a good dad now, she'd be forced to think. when she asks about his family, who raised him, he'd be forced to tell her that it was the very people that killed them both. she wouldn't take that well.

I don't think she'd ever be brought to honest anger, I think it would just be grief, confusion, hopelessness even. to be resurrected into a world where your son doesn't know you, doesn't even go by the name you gave him, was raised by your killer's, who couldn't pick you out of a crowed. that's a whole new level of cruel.

I think she could be swayed like Quaritch, given some sort of redemption arc, but I think she'd always be a bit bitter that her son was robbed from her. I think even if spider clung to her like he did quaritch there would be a disconnect; his maternal neglect and her maternal grief would clash; spider doesn't know what its like to be loved by a mother, he shy's away from her because he's scared of getting hurt, he needs her to make the first move but he also needs her to be slow, gentle, with him in a way she doesn't know how to be. she doesn't recognize her own son, knows nothing about him, has no idea how to connect with him, even if she tries he flees from her, she doesn't know what to do.

in time things could get better, easier, but maternal issues lurk so much deeper then most other wounds, and if both parties are hurting from trauma's that cannot truly be healed, I think it would really difficult. one person is trying to rebuild a relationship that never existed with a boy that is long gone, the other is trying to find a mother in someone who's very existence pains them, in someone who is missing the person he used to be so long ago.