#pats the squid. good job

[freakshowonfire]

high quality retweet from the me

[pointy-spiral]

Hello! I hope you still take requests, if not I'm so sorry to brother you!!!

Anyways! I would love to see more of your yuusona, I think they are so cute 🥰.

And please tell us more about them :D

JKDLSJIIOAUEIOWUIOJKFLDJKFDL THANK YOUU!! :') not a bother at all!! This is such cute and sweet request!! u lil cutiee!!

i haven't really thought out much about her yet, and shes not really based on any specific Disney character, but i have some fun facts about her-

Her shirt is the same style as Epel's, because its a spare pomefiore shirt that Rook gave her during her first week at school. She's really scared of him though. Her first encounter with him was him commenting on her messy uniform, (since i doubt that Crowley would do much more than just grab whatever's in the lost and found basket for Yuu and call it a day) Rook basically drags her to Pomefiore to play dress up while she tries desperately to find some excuse to leave jkhfdfdshhsd

She wishes she could have just kept the job as a janitor instead of being a student at first (but she comes to like school starting the second year) since she enjoys cleaning and tidying and just going for walks, so being an errand runner for Crowley didnt seem too bad to her.

Because of this i wanted to make Floyds nickname for her "Vampire squiddy", since they feed on marine snow and are generally one of the "cleaners" of the deep sea. They live really deep in the sea, matching her gloominess and dislike for crowds and bright light. BUT THEN I REALIZE THAT LILLA CALLED DIBS ON BEING VAMPIRE SQUID so now i don't know anymore... i guess shrimpy still works..

Ever since accidentally stepping on Leonas tail she's been avoiding him like the plague. She thinks he's still mad at her, and nearly cries anytime she sees him dshdhdhdfhj she thinks he's super scary

The skirt she actually sewed by hand herself , using a spare curtain from Ramshackle as fabric.

Back in her "home world" she used to collect and make her own jewelry, the one she wears is one of them. She makes friendship bracelets for her friends of course.

She's good friends with Ortho, and they are desk neighbors. He's tried multiple times to invite her over for game night but she's too scared to hang out with Idia around. But her an Ortho hang out and study together a lot :) he's the designated extrovert friend

She became friends with Jade by being forced to wanting to join the Mountain lovers club. Its actually pretty good, since its a long walk and she can forage for stuff to eat so she can save more money (Crowley pays us in a handfull of pebbles and a pat on the back i swear to god) He's the social anxiety shield and talks for her sometimes.

She still kind of works as a janitor, and she stays after school hours to clean. And uses her job as an excuse to stay away from people, too much to clean!! so many floors to mop!! no i cannot come to ur party Kalim i am so so sorry!! would love too but i have to deep clean the school, by myself, all alone!! tomorrow as well! and the day after!! fdhdfshdshj

Has absolutely bonked Ace in the head with her broom!! he deserves it

Azul tries at some point to get her to be a janitor at Mostro lounge but she runs away from him mid conversation

Secretly very insecure about her height, thinking shes too tall for a lady, plus it just makes her stick out more as well

(actually as im writing this i realize she could be based on Cinderella in a way!!! with the whole evil stepmom (crowley) making you do a bunch of shitty work. im getting ideas.. >:) teehee gonna redraw the ball dance and glass slipper scene with her and someone maybe mwehehehehe)

[opal-owl-flight]

5 for everyone

5. Speech! Speech! Speech! Speech! Will they give one, and what about?

3 would give one -- they do this a lot, anyway! Theyre the one giving the pep talks to their team or agents before and after every situation. They have a talent for making people believe in themselves for both the task at hand and beyond. Their speeches are full of gratitude for the team, usually. Very invigorating. Very validating.

4 would also give one, and is a bit more rough and tumble with her approach. "HELL YEAH!!! YOU KNOW YOU FUCKED UP THAT SHILL, RED SKIES! GIVE IT UP FOR OUR HOMESLICE SALMONID!!!" While 3s speeches have the vibe of a superior being proud of your work, 4 is more like a coworker whos clapping you on the back for a job well done. Shes the hype-squid. Gets most people fired up (some say more than 3s!)

8...shes a shy fella, she probably hides away JWBJE. She shows her gratitude in more private, personal ways, away from crowds. A few soft words, a pat on the head. Or a hug!

Neo3 isnt a speech giver either. But if you put her on the spot, she'll bullshit something up. The vibe of her "speeches" are similar to 4s, but she kind of... also makes fun of everyone while she does it. "GOOD JOB PICKIN UP SEVEN'S SLACK, FIVE! NOW IF ONLY YE CAN BE A LIL QUICKER ON THE CALLOUTS! DAMN!!"

[dotties-haikyuu-agere]

Home

((Ft Cg Iwa, Kunimi, and Kindaichi, little Oikawa and Kageyama, & puppy regressor Kyoutani ))

Tooru couldn’t sit still as Hajime buckled his seatbelt for him. He was bouncing in place, Clarke in his hands as the brute started the car.

“You excited to see Tobio and Kyoutani?”

He nodded vigorously. They were coming home!!! Volleyball season was done and so the two were flying back (Tooru’s ended before theirs and Hajime had recently taken leave for mental health reasons), and the little and the pet regressor stayed regressed for a long time once the season ended to let out all the stress acquired during it.

Tooru was beyond excited to see his brothers, he’d missed them so much and there were so many games he wanted to play with the other regressors.

By the time that they pulled up to the airport, the brunette was literally buzzing with excitement, his carer chuckling as he parked.

“What are our airport rules, buddy?”

“Hold hands, don’t yell, and sit and be patient,” he listed out, causing the shorter to lean over and kiss his forehead.

“Good job. Cmon.”

The airport was always loud. Tobio and Kyoutani always met them in the same spot. Tooru always got a small strawberry milkshake to wait, and this time he was playing Like a Dino on his phone while he sat next to Hajime.

“When’s bubba and Kyoken coming?” he asked for probably the tenth time.

“In ten minutes, bud.”

He sighed heavily. This would be a long wait.

—

Tobio didn’t stay big for very long, once he got off his last plane. It wasn’t even on purpose. Kyoutani held his hand and rolled his own luggage with the other hand, Kageyama faring similarly. He had Julie’s leash in his hand, too, the service dog trotting dutifully beside him.

The blonde led him to where Hajime and Tooru were waiting, and he immediately felt himself start slipping. Hajime asked Tooru to help with the luggage, automatically in walk-and-talk mode. Kyoutani wasn’t in puppy space, but he went non verbal at the sight of their caregiver, like he normally did at the end of every season.

The other simply smiled or hummed at any words that flew out of Tooru’s mouth, Hajime having them all link arms and starting for the exit.

It was mainly a race against the fuzziness overtaking Tobio’s head, to avoid a meltdown in the airport. Yes, Julie would help some, but it was still inconvenient.

They got all the bags into the trunk of the vehicle just before Tobio fully slipped, by which point Julie was settled too and Kyoutani was buckling his seatbelt for him. Hajime handed him a blue pacifier and his squid plushie, Price, which he hugged to his chest. Kyoutani was handed a teether and his well-loved stingray plushie, Kara.

Kyoutani settled, Tooru’s chatter filling up the car ride. Tobio didn’t try to catch it all, as that was a pointless task. He simply floated around in his own brain, eventually falling asleep.

—

Hajime wasn’t stupid enough to not call for backup for the first day having everyone home. Mattsun and Makki normally helped out, but today Kunimi and Sugawara were waiting when he pulled into the driveway. Kunimi unbuckled Tooru, waking the little up gently, and then doing the same for Kyoutani and Tobio. He brought all of them inside, as well as Julie, while Suga helped Hajime unload all of the luggage in the back. Tooru was around 4 or 5 while Tobio was probably 3 at the biggest.

The brute rolled the last of the bags inside, then went to find the little gear for Tobio and Kyoutani’s collar. The mentioned blonde was already barking, having jumped on Tooru who was giggling and patting the other’s head.

“I missed you too, Kyoken,” the brunette assured. Tobio was sitting on the couch, watching, as his pacifier bobbed in his mouth. He was petting Julie and kicking his feet idly. Kyoutani glanced up at the ravenette, whose iPad was being searched for by Kunimi.

Tooru looked up, too, waving at Tobio eagerly.

“Hihi baby!!!”

Tobio stared for a few moments, processing slower than normal with his smaller headspace, before he giggled, letting out some babbles and waving back. He found the collar and a pull-up for Tobio, as well as a rattle and a pacifier clip.

He handed Tobio’s gear to Suga, then turned to Kyoutani, who was currently in a game of tug of war with Tooru.

“Kyoken,” Hajime called, the blonde still growling and pulling the teether that Tooru held. The brute sighed, smiling slightly. He clicked his tongue twice.

“Kyoken, collar,” he tried again, watching the pet regressor perk up and let the teether fall from his mouth. Kyoutani turned to him, and Hajime snapped two times, kneeling and then patting the floor in front of him. “Cmon, collar.”

This was the one thing the puppy ever would cooperate for, normally not the best listener. But the blonde crawled over, sitting back on his heels to let himself be collared. It wasn’t an actual collar, it was a (dully) spiked black choker. After Hajime put it on, he pet the other’s head.

“Good puppy.”

“Kyoken,” Tooru called, the blonde turning at the sound of Tobio babbling.

“Pubby!!”

Tobio was reaching for Kentarou, and it seemed that Kunimi or Suga had let Julie outside. At his little brother calling him so politely, the blonde went over, barking a bit quieter than he did at Tooru or Hajime. The ravenette pet him, before picking up one of the stuffies reserved specifically for fetch, then tossed it.

“Pubby go get!!”

Immediately, the pet regressor was after it. Tooru gasped.

“I wanna throw it next!!!”

Kyoutani narrowly avoided colliding with the wall before he scrambled back to where the two littles were waiting. Tobio pet the blonde again, before Tooru threw the plushie again. Kyoutani chased it, then saw the sliding glass door to the backyard open and darted out. Normally, it would be fine, but Hajime had spotted some sticker weeds out there a few days ago and running around on all fours was probably not the best decision.

“Kyoken, inside!” Hajime called, going out immediately. The other simply growled, then jolted, withdrawing one of his hands to clutch to his chest immediately. The brunette sighed heavily, having anticipated this. The pet regressor whined and started to tear up.

Tooru, as if he’d sensed the injury, came running.

“Oh! Oh, is Kyoken hurt? Papa, he’s hurt! Papa, can I go get the lion ice pack he likes a lot ‘n his paci?”

“Yeah, that should be good, love. You go take care of that, Kunimi can help.”

The little ran back inside and Hajime rooted through his cargo pockets for his finger puppets. He found the lion ones pretty quickly, and popped them into his pointer and thumb as he walked over to the pet regressor who was curled up now with his hand clutched to his chest. Hajime sighed yet again, then clicked his tongue twice.

“Up, puppy,” he said, and Kyoutani reached out and allowed the brunette to hold him on his hip. “Lemme see.”

The now sniffling regressor presented his hand. There was in fact a sticker in it.

“Aww, it’s okay, Haji’s gonna fix it. Let’s get ya inside, hm?” he asked, then presented the two fingers with the lion puppets on them, moving them as if they were talking to each other as he headed inside.

Kyoutani barked, seemingly distracted for now as Hajime went into the bathroom to grab the tweezers and some antiseptic and then presented the blonde with bandaid choices. He had a wide selection of themed bandaids. Kyoutani chose the bone themed ones, so Hajime picked out a black bandaid with bones on it and then went to the nursery and sat on the floor.

He set the pet regressor down and Tooru came scrambling into the room with Kunimi, who held Tobio on his hip.

“He didn’t want me to put him down, so,” Kunimi sighed. Tooru thrust the ice pack his way, then the pacifier— a green one with a black and white shield —and then went to sit by Kyoutani. Hajime held up the pacifier to the blonde, who took it.

“Kyoken, it’s okay! Papa’s gonna take out the ouchie,” the brunette assured. He seemed to be slipping into his older sibling headspace as he held Kyoutani’s good hand. “squeeze if you get scared or if it hurts. Like this.”

Tooru squeezed the pet regressor’s hand. Tobio simply looked on, pacifier still in his mouth as he fiddled with the drawstrings of Kunimi’s hoodie.

“Alright, I’m gonna take it out,” Hajime announced. Kyoutani squeezed Tooru’s hand lightly.

“But be gentle!” Tooru reminded him nervously. “Kyoken, close your eyes. If you see, it hurts worse.”

Kentarou squeezed his eyes shut and Tooru rubbed his shoulder with his free hand. Hajime took the tweezers and pulled the sticker out. It was over relatively quickly, and Hajime swiped over the injury with a little bit of antiseptic.

“All done! Kyoken, done now!” Tooru chimed.

The blonde hesitantly opened his eyes, looking at his hand and watching Hajime put the bandaid on.

“See? All better,” the brute said, and the puppy regressor relaxed a bit. Tobio hummed, Kunimi bouncing him lightly as he played with the man’s hair.

Hajime sighed. The first day having everyone back home was always the roughest. They’d been here for, what, 30 minutes? Kunimi grimaced when Tobio pulled his hair.

“Ow,” he said, a bit over exaggerated to cue the little in that he shouldn’t do that. It worked, as Kageyama almost instantly stopped.

“Can I play with Tobio?” Tooru questioned, pointing at the little who was probably around 1 at the moment. The ravenette, at hearing his name, looked over. Tooru waved, smiling when the other waved back.

“Yeah, go ahead. He’s gettin’ antsy anyways. Should I call Julie up?” the last question was more directed towards Hajime as he set Tobio down and Tooru grabbed a rubber ball.

“I think he’s good,” the brute replied, watching Tobio hit the ball experimentally before rolling it back over. “We don’t really have her up here unless we have to, because we aren’t exactly puppy proofed up here, but he seems fine for now.”

Kyoutani ran downstairs, and then a few thuds were heard. Hajime grimaced before hearing a good number of excited barks.

His roommates were…a handful. For sure. But he wouldn’t have it any other way.

[seffien]

writing a fic that focuses primarily on marie and four so here's some ideas/extra headcanons:

- there’s actually a little living space in cuttlefish cabin. one day, four falls asleep while on a break, so marie lets her sleep in the cabin while she sleeps outside

- after day 1 of her new ‘job’, four looked up marie, and was thinking of calling her ms. cuttlefish out of niceness and respect

- marie is insistent on four eating, drinking, and sleeping properly. one day she makes herself lunch but asks four if she’s eaten before digging in

(“Did you eat already?” asked Marie, breaking Octo Canyon’s windy silence.

Four hesitated, then shook her head. Marie passed her own lunch to her. She looked at it, then the woman in front of her.

And she refused.

“You haven’t eaten. I’m giving you the chance to eat now. Eat.”

Again, a refusal, and again, Marie told her to eat.

“I’m not letting you go until you do.”)

- as mentioned here, marie did indeed patch four up whenever she got hurt.

(She was sure to be gentle with the wound, as it was still bleeding. Whenever Four would flinch, she’d pause. With gentle strokes of a damp cotton pad, she cleaned it. That was easy enough, but disinfecting it wasn’t. Nothing good came of enemy ink in a wound, so to remove that and any other impurities, she applied a disinfectant. It hurt Four a bit, she could tell, but she was surprisingly calm.

"Hard part's over," she muttered, looking up at Four. “You need to be careful, Four. If this keeps up, I won’t be able to let you do any more kettles on your own.”

Four scowled, an action Marie didn’t like.

“Oh, what?” she sighed. “You’re upset that I’m taking care of you? You’re still a kid. I’m not gonna let them rough you up and then do nothing about it.”

That didn’t change Four’s mind.

“Be mad all you want, but that won’t stop me from taking care of you.”

With care, she applied a squid-shaped bandage, then pushed herself up.

“All done.” She made her way inside Cuttlefish Cabin. “Stay where you are, I’ll fix you some food.”)

- of course, marie does indeed teach four how to use a charger...using her own charger, here's a smaller snippet of that.

(Marie shut one eye tight.

"This isn't a Scope, so you just have to get that sense. See it and react."

She yanked back the trigger and shot one of the dummies, popping it.

"Like that. Not a good example since the target's stationary, but here." She tossed Four her charger. It missed her hands and hit the ground with a loud, echoing crack. Four scrambled to pick it up and looked at Marie with wide eyes.

"Don't freak, it's fine." She put her hand on the girl's shoulder. "I'll run past you, and you try to hit me."

Four stepped back, quickly shaking her head.

"You won't actually hit me. Plus, there's a respawn machine in the cabin." She patted her shoulder. "Come on, you can do it.")

(Marie reacted quickly, blocking the shot with her parasol. Then, she closed it and approached Four.

A slightly-genuine smirk spread across her face. "Good shot."

Four raised an eyebrow.

"You'll get it, trust me. If I could, so can you."

The woman swore she saw Four grin at the words, but that grin vanished a second later.)

- four checks on marie one day while the latter is hanging by the map in, what, area 4? optional: marie is a smoker.

(Four hopped down, walking beside Marie. Concern was in her usually expressionless eyes.

"I'm fine, Four. Go do whatever it is you do."

Her eyes went to the cigarrette in her right hand. Marie's face fell. Her mentee, the poor girl, wasn't supposed to see this. Sure, the Octoweapons were huge and dangerous, but Four was able to take those down. How would she react to the knowledge that her boss was a smoker?

The cigarette took a long fall into Octo Canyon's waters below. Four still saw it, obviously, but that wasn't something she wanted to think about.

"Heh," she laughed nervously, "sorry about that. I-I'm just a bit tired." Her fake, uneven smile faded. "Yeah. Tired."

Through all this, Four still stared. It'd feel bad to shoo her off, but there was nothing else to do. Marie waved her hand, and she started to walk away. Before diving into a kettle, she looked behind her, then went in.

Marie sighed, pulling out another cigarette. What a horrible role model she was.)

- near the end, four found marie on a high up spot in an unmarked location in octo canyon. despite marie’s protests—

(Four moved towards her, gazing up.

“Don’t!” Marie called from high up. “You’ll get hurt!”)

—four somehow makes it up.

(Finally, she hopped on up, sitting next to an impressed Marie.

“…Wow. You’re better than I thought.”)

marie sticks her umbrella between the two of them, marking an eternal hangout spot.

(Marie watched the sky, then Four, who watched the sky herself. With a smile, she passed the girl another container.

“Lunch. On me.”)

- when callie was saved, everyone gathered back at octo valley. callie decided to take a photo commemorating her rescue, but it didn't go as planned.

(Callie skipped away from the camera, putting an arm around Marie.

"Alright," she said, "smile!"

She glanced at the faces of the other two, then looked back at the camera right as it flashed.

Not a single genuine smile was in the photo. Callie's smile was nervous, and neither Four nor her cousin were smiling at all.)

- marie later gave four a hug before they all left, telling her 'thank you.' four was reluctant, but she eventually hugged her back

- marie also did indeed bake four a cake and send it to her. she even signed the thing

[flamingskull28]

Neo 3 yawned, extending her weary limbs and receiving a satisfying crack in turn. Captain had asked her not to stay out all day, clearing but well doing three turned into just one more then another then just that sector.... then another.. yeah you get the idea.

"Hopefully Cap'n won't be too peeved." Neo enjoyed rambling to Terrence, her little buddy, he was such a good listener. "Though she's super hypocritical! Like she stays here for hours after a I've left!" Neo huffed slightly annoyed.

Terrence made a slight gurgling noise.

"Huh? You think she's just a workaholic like me.. well yeah, just..."

Buddy burlbed a slight bit more.

"Yeah I should be less harsh on her... she just takes her job seriously.. I should check on her, maybe invite her out for some turfing. I hope she isn't too tired, or lonely..."

Buddy makes an agreement noises.

Neo hurries her pace, Captain spends so much time by herself. Sure the sisters watch out for her but they have their jobs to worry about and craig was sent off for rehydration a while ago. Neo found the thought of captain not having anyone there for her sicking, sure they could be cold and scary but Neo saw she truly cared and was willing to go above and beyond for people she cares about.

Even more worrying was how Captain wasn't responding on the headset, she ALWAYS responded. Neos speed walk turned into a full sprint, she dove into the pipe and rolled out of it quickly arriving at the camp to find...

Captain was fast asleep in the arms of a girl she hadn't met.

Neo raised her gun "Who are you!?" Instead if suprise or feat, the girl slowly turned to her and smiled.

"Oh hey, you must be the New 3. I'm agent 4. Though do be quite, she doesn't get nearly enough sleep..." 4 spoke softly, slowly stroking Captains tentacles as they mumbled in their sleep then seemed to lean on 4 more, a small smile visible..

Neo puts two and two together. "Marie mentioned an Agent 4 before also are you two are... dating?" Captain didn't seem like the romantic type. Though that vision was faded since she was currently leaning on 4's shoulder drooling.

4 chuckled foundly "Yup, not surprised she hasn't told you. Always was shy about it, plus she definitely worries about you to much to have relationship conversations."

Neo tilted her head, confused. "She.. worrys about me? Why, I thought she just wanted to do a good job."

4 smiled and shook her head "She wants to make sure you're safe. It's why she stays here so long, to make sure you don't sneak back in and keep doing missions, like she did as an Agent." 4 sighed and lifted up her girlfriends hat and bangs, showing a noticeable scar. "Got struck pretty bad one time, I had to drag her back to base. While she was still bleeding..." 4 let the bangs fall back followed by the hat which dropped over Captains eyes.

"Oh....." Neo suddenly felt terrible about all the times she fought Captain tooth and nail, trying to stay and patrol more. She guiltfully gaze downwards, her heart sank knowing how distressed she must've made Captain feel. She'd been like a parent to her from the start, sure a quiet and edgy one but a parent nonetheless.

"Kid, eyes up and drop the frown." 4 ordered lightheartedly "We've all been reckless on the job, I've lost count of the times Captain or Marie has chewed me out while patching me up cuz I was being reckless ." She stared off for a moment, seeming to reminisce before snapping back to the moment "Anyway, it's late kid, Come here."

"Huh? Why? Shouldn't I be heading home..."

4 lifted the arm that wasn't wrapped around Captain and showed her squid sisters watch. "It's midnight, you or your little buddy will not be walking home by yourself this late." She patted the spot next to her, and her voice left no room for argument.

Neo hesitantly sat next to 4, only now did she realize how tired she was. How did she even manage to stay up till midnight and not notice? 4 was right, splatsville was dangerous and not exactly the safest place to walk around in when you're half asleep.

Absent mindedly Neo leaned into 4, she was oddly comfortable. She understood why captain looked so peaceful, any form of embarrassment was quickly stomped out by her dreary fatigue. A sentiment seemingly shared by Terrence as he happily chirped and curled up in Neo's lap.

"Rest now, its been a long day." 4's hand gently pet Neo's longer tentacle, she didn't think she'd ever felt this safe and comfortable. "Night kid."

"*yawn* g-goodnight... m-mom..." Neo drifted off, not even registering what she'd said or the surprised smile on 4's face.

4 chuckled looking over the slumbering inkling then over to her girlfriend. "Mom huh..? Guess we are Cap, guess we are..."

[coral-and-reef]

[idk what title to put]

CW: swearing (two words lmao but anyway)

Words: 1302 words

Depicting Foami as Neo Agent 3. I don't think this will be the canon version of her lore and more like a "what if".

I'm still learning how to write. My bad for any grammar mistakes or something. Probably this is my first piece writing (not counting Wattpad) I have ever posted in my life.

Squid divider taken from here

Eyes shut, deep inhale. Being on Alterna feels way more different in contrast to the abrasive environment of the Splatlands. Aside from being in chilly places like Shipshape Cargo Co. and Crableg Capital, this, however, is incomparable. Tranquillity, peace. Despite the surroundings consisting of white islands floating on a vast sea, it is quite enjoyable to only hear the sounds of the water. Perhaps, taking breaks wasn’t that awful after all. Maybe following that old man wasn't a bad decision. The suit is comfortable and the weapon looks cool. Being with smallfry is useful too, but its origins still remain a mystery.

The breeze tickles against her tan skin. Frosty air penetrates her nostrils and the warm breath turns into icy mist as soon as it exhales out of her mouth. Sitting on the cold metallic infrastructure, the mind submerges on the sweet moments of her life. Fighting in the arena. Sweat and ink running down their faces. Crushing the weaklings spirits as they slowly take one by one their opponents. Moments of glory and laughter with her best friend. Fun times. 

He would love to visit this place, if there was even a possibility.

Foami snaps out when feeling something poking her hand. Smallfry bumps their head repeatedly and after getting her attention, their head darts at the brown substance. The stomach of the tiny salmon grumbles soundly, making puppy eyes.

—Heh. My bad, little guy. Got you waiting for too long, isn’t it? —the fish nods as she gets up—. Let’s keep going.

Both smallfry and Foami get back to work. Throwing her companion, the fuzzy balls disappear in just a blink of an eye, being gulped by the ferocious creature. In comparison to the first island where their “bosses” are, the second island took longer than expected to clear. Good thing Foami had enough power eggs, managing to finish the job quickly. The octo places her hands on the hips proudly, the area finally fuzzy ooze free. The small salmonid jumps excitedly.

—You are such a minuscule yet insatiable thing, eh little buddy? —the octoling asks, grabbing and lifting them.

The smallfry just burps. Her face quickly shifts to an offended expression.

—Cough… And stinky too. How rude —smallfry just makes a smug face. Foami frowns—. Is that the best you can do?

Before they could continue their dispute, running footsteps and a feminine voice could be heard from a distance.

—Heeey! Agent 3!

Turning around, Foami finds the black haired inkling approaching, a cheery aura radiating from her. The octoling still wonders how she does not catch a cold from the freezing temperatures.

—It's impressive how you managed to clear up this place in no time. Captain would be proud of you. Great job, Agent 3! —Callie pats on Foami's shoulder, a grin carved on her lips.

—It’s… it’s nothing —a slight blush of embarrassment runs across Foami's cheeks. Just a few seconds later, her body flops against the floor abruptly, sighing—. But… this whole “hero” thing… it's gonna end up splatting me.

Callie laughs, remembering her times as a young member of The Squidbeak. Her eyes slowly inspected the place; the reflections of the huge towers shine by the rays of the sun and the yellow ink is splattered everywhere.

—Well, you have done a lot today. I think Captain wouldn’t mind if you go home now, you deserve it after having your tentacles here all day. We don’t want you to end up turning into takoyaki, do you?

Foami rubs her chin, actually considering it. The popstar helps her get up and hands a power egg pack.

—This is for you and the little one; from Captain —Callie says as she pets smallfry—. We are lucky to have you in our team, Agent 3. Rest and remember, stay fresh!

Striking her iconic pose, her uplifting demeanour makes the youngster smile slightly before superjumping to the exit.

★★★★★

Afternoon on Splatsville, the bright sun sets on the horizon. The colour orange is predominant on the skies and strangely, there are no clouds. There are still many squiddos and octokids just chilling around and battling like usual, while plenty of tired jellies are on their way to return home.

Foami does not enter the lobby nor Grizzco Industries. Despite her stubbornness, her body is way more exhausted than usual since she got assigned to the whole agent job thing. That will help with her resilience, she thinks. Before she is about to enter the train station, the upcoming Splatfest announcement catches her eye.

—Which do you seek? A Triforce throwdown! —Shiver says, the theme showing on Big Man’s huge TV.

While the trio start discussing their choices, the afro haired octo thinking about hers, looking the options meticulously. “Power”, “Wisdom” and “Courage”. Probably power. Or courage, after what happened with her best friend. Main reason she avoids working, battling or participating in Splatfests in the first place, perhaps.

Glancing up, Smallfry snores comfortably on Foami’s head, squishing it like a mochi pillow.

—For sure, you would be on Team Wisdom, little dummy —she thinks, smiling.

Her attention focuses back on Deep Cut; after they finish their rambling, the Splatcast switch topics by broadcasting the best players.

—These are the top 8! This is “The best 8 of Splatsville”!

The screen has no trace of Foami on the ranking. Only familiar figures; some she has shamed and the other one she feels regret.

—...As for the player “kAyOSs”, it seems like they are demolishing anything on their way! Previously taking player “AnemoneNo1” down, now player “Hirooooo” gets dethroned from the Top 1. How long do you think player “kAyOSs” can be in that position?!

Foami laughs internally before her mouth slowly curves into a sour expression.

—Congrats, Wire.

★★★★★

Swipe card, go through a checkpoint, get on the train. Watch mountains and cities through the glass, try to get some sleep. Finally managing to arrive home, she carefully places the drowsy smallfry on a custom poorly-made tiny bed. Trying to not make a lot of noise, Foami gets to eat at least something, undressing until feeling comfy. She lays herself on the messy couch, decorated with a pile of clothes and a few blankets. Eventually, the last rays of sun going through the window dissipate, the noise of crickets welcoming the night.

Foami stares at the ceiling. Only two months have passed and it feels like an eternity. For sure, being an agent has provided a new distraction or “hobby” to occupy her time and mind. At least a pretty good damn reason to not be seen or see anyone. There is none to see anyway, but it wouldn’t be pleasant to cross paths with the enemies she has made on her journey. Especially him.

Pressure starts to build up.

Discomfort.

Questions about past decisions.

Guilt.

Regret.

The emotional outbursts.

Passive-aggressive moments.

High expectations.

The last straw.

[…]

—Fo, the fuck is wrong with you?

—What now? What. Now.

—Another defeat. We are starting to have a long losing streak.

—You think I’m the only one contributing to that?

—They did NOT get splatted as much as you. You are the only one getting crushed the most in every match. Hell, you weren’t even able to avoid getting shot by a beginner weapon like the Splattershot Jr.!

—I know, dude! You think I’m the only one having tough luck? Why are you focusing so much on me lately, man?!

—Because YOU and I are the strongest on the team? You are supposed to be one. Focus, Foami, focus. Do I have to remind you what we are fighting for? What defines Splatsville? You are not on the same level as them, aren’t you?

—I’M NOT! We just- I just have to train more and do better next time dude, I-...

—...I doubt that, Fo.

—...

—...

—You know what, Wire?

—...

—Fuck off.

[...]

[h3ad-quarters]

*Comet nodded and followed HQ, he mumbled things along the way, things about sea creatures, he mentioned the swordtail squid and how cool he thinks they look, he mentioned the searchlights and how he thought they looked like a fishing lure his dad used to have...

And then, he mentioned Sebastian*

Never met a man who was a fish before... he is nice.. pats my head, tells me good job and good luck... he let's me stay at his hide away to rest.. it -yaawwn- it's nice having a friend down there..

HQ lead Comet away from the general commotion of the site, towards more of a living quarters area to find somewhere available for the man to rest for a while.

he listened along as Comet mumbled stories, nodding along, all of the usual things to see in blacksite then..

"Man who's a fish..? I hope you're not talking about Z-13.. its not to be trusted, its killed many of my units."

[fleshwerks]

Thoughts on new Dragon Age "teaser"? You have the best takes.

I'll be deadly honest, I didn't even realise it was out, that's how checked out I am, but I will always fall hook line and sinker for a delicious bait made of things I can chew on, so let's seeeeeee. I'll do first impressions for now. I'll warn you, I haven't done 'takes' in ages, I've seriously lost my edge and resemble someone yelling at a cloud more than someone with intelligent or at least entertaining takes. Proceed on your own volition. Note, I have not been keeping up with DA4 updates. At all. I am literally grasping at straws and screaming out of my arse.

I'll say this. I believe Mark Darrah who had retired from BioWare was brought back on to save this tattered ship that had failed to launch how many times now? If you were with DAI and Anthem especially, you know that when a vet of that calibre is being brought on board towards the end of production, you're fucked. The sheer scope of the regions visited in the trailer... I wouldn't blink an eye if it was a turn-based strategy game, but it is not.

I'm surprised how shit the game visually looks, but it's been my criticism with the thus far released art, and now, environment assets. And again, I'm coming off of Anthem, and Anthem was truly, truly gorgeous. Now someone might argue that every DA has had its distinctive visual style. Well I thought DA2, for what it was, sure did look inspired. I didn't enjoy the game or the characters, but I enjoyed looking at it. Dragon Age Inquisition kind of lost me aesthetically, but I see what they did there. It was more generic, certainly not attempting to be photorealistic, but I saw the idea and accepted it.

Now this though? What is this? The panning over what I presume is Treviso literally looks like a mobile game ad.

Ok, fine, I'll not go in on the visuals, I'm too fresh out of art college and I'm so anal-retentive that my o-ring's more pinched than a pinprick about this stuff. Moving on.

I believe the new PC is an Antivan Crow? Since when are they fighting for all of Antiva? Everyone??? Since when?! Zevran's canonically not returning, and even he was compassionately practical on his best days. The Crows are not good people. They buy kids to train for miserable jobs meeting miserable ends. Oh, so we had a whole character who gave the Crows a finger for being the shitshow they were, but now they're this resistance task force? What, why, because the 'Islamic Borg' invaded?

Then. I feel like I'm missing a fuckton of contest because I haven't read the preceding comics and stories, I have one comic book from the DAI-DA4 interim and it ended so disappointingly, I never bothered after that.

We're really retconning all the complex and complicated factions into freedom fighters, aren't we. I guess such is the state of our real world. Always a plucky band of people belonging to formerly shitty fucking organisations suddenly saving the day like heroes, possibly somewhere along the way ruminating for 2 seconds on whether they deserve to pat themselves on the back, landing on 'but we will change how we operate, and we will save the world, always!'

I'm into the Rivaini squid though. I've never been fond of Rivain, not just because parts of the fandom like to present this place that has barely been talked about in canon like some haven for... idk. I just didn't expect squids. And you people know I love marine invertebrates. You know what, fuck it, here's my 'best take': have squid, will travel!

But that port city ravaged recently by the dragons in ruins looks like it's been in ruins for the past 2000 years, only recently excavated. It's so clean. And here I go again with the aesthetics.

Anyway, Falon'din and/or dirthamen is fuckin' around in Rivain, aren't they. Because I believe that head shape, multi-hands etc were presented in many of the statues we saw in DAII, and given that Falon'din's proverbial crows, envy and nightmare were so prominently featured, and sexyman Solas' outright resentment for former master Dirthamen and the vain Falon'din, welll... risen gods. Dirthamen at the very least was associated with watery depths, but they're twins (or are they? Perhaps the facets of one person altogether)... Anyway, I'm more interested in what the fuck is happening in Weisshaupt. That part genuinely interests me. Circling back to Dirthamen, Razikale is the dragon of Mystery. Associated with Dirthamen, at least according to my theory, while Urthemiel was the Dragon of Beauty, and we keep getting indications that Falon'din was pretty, aggressive, and exceedingly vain. So Big Dirty's up next. Falon'din had the crows, right? Both defeated in DAI. He's out, more or less. And again, Solas most likely was Dirthamen's student before he decided that he himself didn't want to be but totally wanted to be revered. So my take is that Razikale, who got mentions in DAI is waking up as well.

The villain gods of this mess, the classic Dragon Age false gods we fight in every single game as end bosses, will be connected to Dirt. Eh. Same eagle, different liver.

Anyway I have a doubt that this kind of scope will end anywhere nice. The production's been fraught as fuck to the point where the panic button has been pressed many times. The art looks like a significant downgrade, the production has been filled with veterans just clocking the fuck out.

It doesn't sound interesting. I'm tired of saving the world as an Eastern European in late 2023. This kind of story does not speak to me at all anymore. Not after 2019, not after 2021. It looks dated and mediocre, the story is so old that if it goes where I think it will, it has no relevance or message for anybody but perhaps some American audiences (some). I'm just... I'm not.

The rah-rah I got from that clip leaves me ice cold. There is no rah-rah in such widespread misery. There are only curse words and the sound of grinding teeth, and everybody's a dick, and everybody's dick past is dredged up hard. No retcons.

I don't want it. It better receive insanely high marks for me to play it. And I loved this franchise, two of the PCs have gone on to be archetypal in my private works now.

The mystery is gone. The power creep... I don't want to hang out with gods. They should have never been brought into the story as characters you can extensively hang out with. Edit: basically the entire thing sounds about as exciting as a somewhat well-produced mobile game. Which is fun to fuck with while taking the metro, but...

[anubislover]

Home is Where the Heart Is

(The fanfic I wrote for the @womenwantedzine way back, now finally exposed to the public, lol)

As she cleaned her tools and listened to the steady hum of the Polar Tang’s engine, Ikkaku decided that there was nothing she didn’t love about being a Heart Pirate.

After all, her crew was simply the best. Her captain was a brilliant doctor and a member of the Worst Generation. The boys were vibrant and fun and capable, and it was a blast coming up with awesome poses together. Plus, they hands-down had the cutest navigator of any crew on the Grand Line, and she didn’t mind the occasional garchu from him, despite how hot and sweaty he could get.

Not that it was always easy, being the only girl on the crew. When she’d first come aboard, she’d had to deal with more than a few awkward situations, like sharing a bathroom, overhearing inappropriate conversations, the occasional unthinking sexist comment, and, of course, the embarrassment that came with medical check-ups and monthly menstrual cycles.

Now, though, the boys fully respected her. Or at least they never acted like heart-eyed idiots around her the way they had with the Kuja. She didn’t have to worry about not having a tampon since they were bought in bulk; after all, they were great for plugging bullet wounds. And while the boiler suit wasn’t what most people would consider high-fashion, it was nice that it was unisex and utilitarian. The thick material protected her skin from hot pipes and sharp metal, and honestly, she pulled it off the best.

After a while, she’d even come to love—well, tolerate—their alliance with the Straw Hats. She may have opposed it at first and seen their help as worthless, but it was hard to stay mad after she found out that Monkey D. Luffy had basically saved Law’s life. And, perhaps, she’d mainly resisted teaming up because she was upset that her captain had sent her and the crew to Zou instead of letting them help.

Most of all, she loved the Polar Tang. The submarine was far more high-tech than any other pirate ship she’d seen, and she knew every nut, bolt, pressure gauge, and pipe. It was unique. It was home.

What other ship could travel underwater without that bubble coating from Sabaody? Could practically disappear beneath the waves when pursued by the Navy, or pop back up for a surprise attack? What other ship was able to observe deep sea life like the Tang?

They did have to deal with the unique hazard of the occasional hungry squid mistaking them for a whale, but hey, she’d take that over most Marines. It was killer on the paint job, though. A steady supply of yellow paint was a necessity for dealing with those sucker marks.

And of course, no other ship had someone like her on board. Every member of the crew had some knowledge of the Tang’s workings, but Ikkaku prided herself on her expertise. Why, just from the feel of her feet on the steel walkways and the angle of the water in a glass, she could tell whether or not the trim tanks needed balancing or if they needed to redistribute the weight of fuel and supplies.

The Polar Tang was her home, and Ikkaku was determined to take good care of it. After all, it took care of the Hearts. She was familiar with the legends of the Klabauterman, and with the way she loved and looked after the ship, she was certain one existed on board. And if it didn’t, well, she was the next best thing.

The clunk of boots echoing through the hallway broke her out of her thoughts, and checking the clock, she realized it was time for dinner. If she didn’t get moving, she’d likely find herself Shambled into the galley.

Giving the engine one last affectionate pat, she ran off to join her nakama.

[kinopioa]

Unfair Squid Abuse Pre Movie Part 3

Observations of S1: https://www.tumblr.com/kinopioa/720614514310201344/squid-abuse-in-pre-movie-spongebob?source=share

Observations of S2: https://www.tumblr.com/kinopioa/721449813793734656/unfair-squid-abuse-pre-movie-part-2?source=share

This post will cover S3 Unfair Squid Abuse. Note I said unfair, as situations that are heavily pushed on by him are that karmic enough to warrant it don't count as "unfair". Minor sass and scoffing is NOT a good enough reason for extreme violence or psychological abuse

S3 Ep2A: Club Spongebob;

Squidward's on his way to work, but then is soon jeered at by Spongebob and Patrick in their clubhouse. He gets fed up about it, so he goes to prove he's cool, only to find that the duo were trapped in the clubhouse, now Squidward being another victim. You'd think they'd ask for help instead of immediately jeering, but whatever

Squidward doesn't take this and reaches over for the vine to get out, but the vine snaps then vaults them into the forest. He panics at first, until SB brings out the conch, then he and Patrick start their Magic 8 Ball bs

From here Squidward no longer cares about them, ditching them to try to find a way out, but fails. So for the next few weeks Squidward has made a fire and been eating bugs. Note that while he mocks SB and Patrick, nor wants to share what little food he had, SB and Pat were literally doing nothing to help. The situation escalates when a plane drops loads of food near SB and Pat, and the two gorge on it. Squidward then begs for food while still denying the conch, but the Sponge won't let him until he accepts it. Despite that, the conch keeps saying no to all his requests, leaving Squidward to still starve. He then starts having a mental breakdown, until a park ranger comes by. Unfortunately he too has a conch, and all proceed to do nothing, now Squidward is mentally shot

Abuse Gauge: Near cult gaslighting

____

S3 Ep2B: My Pretty Seahorse;

Surprisingly despite him not being a major part of the ep, Squidward is blighted. First is in the beginning where the flowers spontaneously hiss at him, then later where he spontaneously explodes after randomly tripping

Interestingly, he notes how karma screws him over generally

Abuse Gauge: Nature is wild

____

S3 Ep4B: Idiot Box;

After pointing out that SB wasted money ordering a TV to just get the box (so SB never checks the dump, or recycling center?), he asks SB if he can take the TV. The Sponge agrees, and Squidward happily takes the CRT inside, then realizing he left the remote outside. When he comes back he hears SB and Patrick loudly playing in the box. Annoyed by the noise, he kicks the box, only to suddenly hear an avalanche and anguish. He feels guilty and opens it to see the damage, but finds SB and Pat just sitting there. He starts questioning the two, but as SB insists that it's just their imagination, despite Squidward, someone that's a stick in the mud, not having much of.

Annoyed, the grumpy octopus goes back inside to prove he has an imagination, only to fail. More of SB and Pat's realistic noises pop up, and Squidward starts losing sight of reality, getting fed up to just go back qnd watch TV, but all channels remind him of the box. He once again checks the two to see if there's a recording device (oddly, Patrick has a box for a recorder), only to get nothing. He frantically tries to rationalize how SB and Pat make those noises, not realizing that Derek Drymon and Hillenburg have had him as the buttmonkey since 1997. He decides to sneak into the box when the two go to sleep for the night, whoch takes hours, then sneaks in. He at first isn't having luck, until a garbage truck engine rrrs, making him think he's driving a race car, only for it to take the box and throw him into the dump

Abuse Gauge: Imagine being a buttmonkey

____

S3 Ep5A: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy IV;

When Spongebob gets the belt, he messes around instead of doing his job in the Krusty Krab. Squidward gets spooked by one of the belt blasts and spills a shake, leading to him getting punched by a customer. He goes in the kitchen to find SB shrinking Krustu Krab supplies to enact a mini restaurant, then notices the belt. He then goes to tattle on SB (taking joy of SB's panic, though given the punch from earlier...), but SB immediately shrinks him. Squidward demands to be returned to normal, but SB doesn't know what to do. He ends up spawning extra eyes on Squidward, burning him, deforming his nose, making him skinless, cutting him in half, along with 8 other horrible off screen sessions. Squidward begs him to ask Mermaid Man for help, but Spongebob is too scared to let him, so he kidnaps Squidward and goes to Patrick. Pat thinks mini Squidward is a toy, and immediately starts playing with him, even smashing him up to a pickle for romance (Pat ships pickles apparently). While Squidward contemplates suicide, SB ends up shrinking Pat. SB gets more paranoid, shrinking anyone that speaks to him, and he ends up stuffing and overcrowding them in a jar. And then the rest they break out the jar, climb all over SB and hit him, then SB shrinks the town and himself

Abuse Gauge: Wumbo Combo'd

____

S3 Ep9A: Krab Borg;

To sum it up, throughout the ep Spongebob, due to watching scary movies, thinks that robots are taking over. His fear mongering affects even Squidward, and the two capture Mr. Krabs due to thinking he's a robot after an accident with salt (wait, isn't the ocean...?). Squidward wants to begin interrogation, though SB is too quick to the trigger in slapping the crab before questions were asked. Getting nothing after the interrogation, They settle to break Mr. Krabs' appliances until he cracks. Squidward, now suspicious of Mr. Krabs actually showing emotion, asks SB how he what happened in the rest of the movie. SB starts to recount the movie he saw last night, realizing that even there the robots were just mass hysteria. He then immediately runs out, leaving Squidward to take full blame of the events that transpired

Legit, just dipped from responsibility

Abuse Gauge: Krab fury

____

S3 Ep10B: Krusty Krab Training Video;

The entire video takes a potshot on Squidward, even leaking his actual name. Squidward even mentions that this is all forcibly overtime

Abuse Gauge: Unpaid humility

____

S3 Ep11A: Party Pooper Pants;

To get Squidward to come to his party, SB sabotages his cable

Ironically it is SB that suffers way more for his actions this ep

Abuse: Minor televised annoyance

____

S3 Ep13B: Clams;

Due to Mr. Krabs senile delusions of knowing specifically what his millionth earned dollar is, Squidward and Spongebob are "rewarded" by going on a fishing clamming trip. Spongebob already screws up by snagging on his chair, shirt, even his nose, making Squidward with a ripped off nose want to leave. However SB ends up snaring Mr. Krabs' millionth dollar, which then is eaten by the giant clam, so now the crew are forced to stay to get it back for the next few days. Things go further south with Mr. Krabs threatening starvation, which prompts Squidward and Spongebob to escape. Unfortunately Mr. Krabs expected this, and so uses the two as live bait to get the giant clam

Abuse Gauge: Fish hook through the nose

____

S3 Ep17B: Camping Episode;

Squidward, anticipating for peace and quiet for once cuz Spongebob and Patrick have a camping trip, is disappointed to find that they just camp in their front yard. He questions the two on why they aren't legitimately in the wild, but SB is adament about this being "wild enough". He tells Squidward good night, but Squidward gets psyched into thinking he's calling him weak (whoops, there goes squiddy's ego), so he insists on camping with SB and Pat. After failure in setting up his tent, having hot food drenched on him, and an annoying Song, Squidward learns of the Sea Bear myth. He denies it, (especially since he's 10ft in front of his house anyway so why would there be wild animals on his lawn), even dances in a hot just to prove a point, but Jay Lender says otherwise, so a Sea Bear mauls him for a good few minutes. The ep ends with a Sea Rhino ominously nearby about to attack Squidward

Abuse Gauge: Wild Jay Lender attack

____

S3 Ep18B: Plankton's Army;

Generally missed, but Squidward was stuffed into the toilet under Mr. Krabs

Abuse Gauge: Being an unofficial member of the TMNT

____

S3 Ep20B: Pranks A Lot;

Much like most of Bikini Bottom, Squidward is spooked into thinking there are ghosts, which causes a hole in his wall as he runs out

Abuse Gauge: Mild cowardly exit

____

Welp, that's the 3 seasons

Notes;

-For all 3 pre movie seasons, it seems that anytime he wants to do what Spongebob/Patrick are doing, he gets punished for it. Guess the moral is to never do anything new, cuz it'll bite. How depressing

-Despite "Camping Episode", S1's "Jellyfishing" still has the most severe Squid Abuse for the first 3 seasons

-S3 introduces Squidward napping at work. "Krusty Krab Training Video" pokes fun at this newfound development

-Spongebob being a karma houdini starts developing this season

-There are more eps this season of Spongebob being blighted alongside Squidward

This research has been a waste of time for me, but here's your truth. Squid Abuse happened prior to S4

Does this mean the episodes are bad? No (well Pranks A Lot is boring). They're generally funny or entertaining

But saying "pre movie of Squidward suffering was all about karma" is incredibly false. Pyrric victories are too little or not even there!

[splattales]

“We vacuumed it all up! Every last drop,” Ribbon cheers, skipping out of Tay’s unusually modified mech and onto the Alternian ‘snow’. “I bet lil’ buddy could’ve eaten it all if we had enough power eggs, though.”

“I bet he could.” Tay laughs, walking out after her and toward the group of cephalopods waiting below. “It’d be a much more time-consuming process though, wouldn’t you say?”

Molly folds her arms as they approach, though there isn’t anything for her to find fault with. Ribbon was correct – the fuzzy ooze in Grizz’s rocket had been decommissioned, and every other remnant was now contained within Octavio Jr’s ship tank. Alterna was spotless. Well, still crunchy with a large amount of crystal dust, but otherwise spotless. “Guess that means we really can wrap up here, gang. Biohazard’s gone.”

“It’s about time we had a break.” Marie yawns.

“Huh? I thought you were on break this whole time!” Callie quips. “Gramps sure seemed to think so—he left before Tavio even started.”

“No way, I’m suuuuper busy being a manager here. Gramps isn’t technically part of the Splatoon anymore, so he can go home whenever he wants.” Marie shrugs. “He probably just left for his afternoon nap.”

“I don’t think Cuttlefish likes me at the best of times,” Tay scoffs, rolling his eyes. “I can’t say I blame him. But after today, don’t say I never do anything for you surface-dwellers.”

“I can’t blame him either,” Marie mutters. Callie elbows her, smiling.

Marina steps out from the group, speaking up. “Um—Mister Octavio, sir … what exactly are you going to do with the ooze…?”

The emperor gives a light shrug. “My science guy said he wants to study it, see if it can be used to reverse the physical effects of sanitization – and vice versa, for fuzzification. Seems like a long shot if you ask me, but the more he learns, the faster we’ll figure out how to break it down if it all needs to go.”

“Ah—I see. Thank you.” She clears her throat. “That was, um, everything.”

“Good work, team.” Molly gives a brief thumbs up, before turning to start gathering her things. “Boy am I ready to be back in Inkopolis…”

“You’re welcome~ I’ve got a broken ceiling to get through.” Tay turns, heading back toward his spaceship. His tail swishes behind him as he walks. “I’m sure we’ll run into each other again. It seems to keep happening, regardless of how desperately I try to avoid you.”

The Squid Sisters take this as their cue to leave as well. Ribbon has spent this time listening in silence, confused as everyone gives their goodbyes. “Wait, wait, that’s it? Everyone’s just gonna go home? I’ll see you all here tomorrow, right?”

“Well, you’ll see me tomorrow,” Marina tries to reassure her, “My job’s never done. But the Splatoon’s taken care of everything with their mission here.”

“But—but I live here. And I’m part of the Splatoon.”

“And you still are.” Molly pats Ribbon on the head. “You can hold the fort here and contact us if anything out of the ordinary happens. Same for us—we won’t leave you out of the loop.”

“Oh. Well. Thanks,” Ribbon mumbles, still chewing on this thought. “I’m gonna come back tomorrow and help Marina with the human stuff, then.”

“I’ll be here—or at the trailer!” Marina confirms, waving as Ribbon plods off, still thinking.

As soon as the young eel hybrid disappears through the grate, Molly confronts the octoling. “What d’you mean you’re not coming back to Inkopolis?”

Marina blinks rapidly, confused by this line of questioning. “I live here—my old place in Inkopolis was just student accommodation, and now I have a job. Not to mention a human roommate to look after. All eight of my tentacles are full.”

“Right. But… What about Finn? Isn’t he going to miss you?”

“Well, sure he will. But he’s been missing you, Marie, and Callie this whole time too.”

“But—you’re our—you’re my friend.”

Marina stretches a smile. “And here I thought you were tolerating me this whole time. … Well, I’m not going to stop you from visiting. And you all have shellphones.”

“Right. Well, I’m gonna visit.” Frowning, Molly adjusts her hat so that it’s tight on her head and slings her bag of belongings over her shoulder. On her way out, she calls back, “and you’d better visit us, too!”

“Aye, captain.”

[raitrolling]

Shot in the Dark

[Easy reading version on Toyhou.se]

Vallis hummed to himself as he wiped down the glass of one of the large aquarium tanks, the fish on the other side swimming around in a carefree manner. The tanks often took multiple nights to properly clean given their size and the amount that the cuspblood owned, but the outside was much easier than the tank interiors. He didn’t mind the latter, however, the water always felt very inviting and he enjoyed being able to get so up close and personal with his many pets. Sometimes his octopi even try to play with him while he’s vacuuming their enclosures! They are quite a fun distraction sometimes.

Occasionally, a fish would curiously bump its face against the glass as he moved the cloth past it, and Vallis would laugh, feeling the vibrations of his own voice in his gills. The sensation felt strange sometimes, like it was something he was still getting used to, even though he’s almost certain he’s always had them. Why wouldn’t he? He may be on the cusp between indigo and purple, and his fins may be small compared to others, but he was still a seadweller.

A spacey, scatterbrained seadweller, but a seadweller nonetheless. Why, he had almost forgotten that he had something important to do tonight! More important than cleaning all his aquariums. He had a deal to make! Connections with trolls of the less savoury variety, those who required his knack for being able to find trolls with mutations and bring them back to his hive. He would love to keep them for longer and allow them to live so that he could study them further, but unfortunately that goes against Empirical law! At least if he sent them off to traffickers, they could find them a place to be more useful.

There was just one problem: He had been so caught up in researching the strange squid that lives in Vernrot Harbour, that he had completely forgotten about his other job.

Oh well! Not much he can do about it. An alarm went off on his phone, reminding him that he needs to meet someone at the docks. They won’t mind, surely! Not if he explains to them what’s happened.

Vallis set the cleaning supplies aside, keeping them in sight so he’ll remember which tank he’s still cleaning once he returns. He then made his way upstairs to the residential section of his hive, patting his pockets to make sure he had his phone and keys on him (of course he had his phone, the alarm was still going off! He laughed, amused by his own blunder).

He shut the front door behind him and listened for the distinct click of the lock, then took his phone out of his pocket. He had been sent coordinates from the troll he was going to meet, marking the meeting place as Dunwich Pier. Not too far away from his hive, thankfully. Not that he didn’t enjoy walking in the rain, ears and fins both pricked listening to the ocean (it almost sounded like it was whispering ‘danger, danger’ - how strange!), humming in tune with the waves. It was a lovely experience, yes, but really he just wanted to get this over and done with.

There were much more important things going on with his life than the demands of gangsters.

He reached the pier in no time at all, noting that it was devoid of any other trolls. The fishermen had all returned to their hives for the night, no tourists were sightseeing, and most importantly, his guests had not yet arrived. Perhaps it was due to the intensity of the storm tonight, thunder rumbling and the skies intermittently illuminated with lightning. Hardly an unusual phenomenon, not like the record storm that had hit earlier this sweep.

Vallis continued to hum in tune with the waves as he gazed out towards the ocean. The melody was pleasing to his ears and felt good in his chest, and it felt like he could almost forget the entire world around him. He still could not see his favourite specimen, all this time he had only caught short glimpses of it while offering it food, and even when he plunged himself down into the depths of the harbour he could never witness its entire body. But he felt like he could feel its presence whenever he stared at the ocean, its promises of an exciting discovery that was purely his, its comfortable embrace that can be felt through the water, the soothing melody of the ocean’s song. If only he could abandon this job and leap off the pier and into the water, swimming as carefree as the fish in his aquarium tanks…

The cuspblood turned around when he heard two pairs of footsteps approaching, fins twitching. Their gait was even, and they walked with purpose. He found it interesting how sometimes he could really focus on certain sounds, but nothing compared to the beauty of the ocean lapping at the pier’s supports (‘danger, danger’, it kept warning). His eyes met with the two trolls, a yellowblood and a jadeblood. They wore the signature red checkered scarves their gang used as an insignia, the yellowblood’s was tied around their left arm and the jadeblood wore his as a bandana. Vallis never knew if the location of the scarf had any meaning, but he never wanted to ask. He was only in contact with them because they had a use for the mutant trolls he caught.

But tonight, he had nothing for them. They recognised this, and stopped a couple metres away from the scientist.

“Ah. Hello! Nice to meet you. Did you send the message?”

Vallis greeted them cheerfully, but neither troll responded. The jadeblood raised one arm, and something metallic began to materialise in their hand. A strife weapon, by the looks of it.

Vallis blinked, and a soft click confirmed his suspicions. The troll was armed with a pistol, and Vallis was quick to raise both arms up in surrender. 

 “Well. Haha. As you can see. I’m afraid I’ve been a little too bu-”

BANG

BANG

BANG

Vallis’ body jerked and shuddered as the bullets ripped through him: one shot through the skull, one in the neck, and the final one in the chest. The last thing he recalled was a blurred flash of yellow light from the other troll’s eyes, and vague, disjointed thoughts of fascination that their psiionics must have assisted with firing such lethally accurate shots.

His body hit the pier with an unceremonious thump, and the scientist was no more.

The jadeblood lowered his gun, and the yellowblood’s psiionics fizzled out. They looked at each other in a silent debate on if they should move the body, but decided against it. It was close enough to the edge of the pier that a particularly opportunistic animal could feed on it, and they doubted anyone would want to avenge the death of a mutant trafficker. Not that they couldn’t take on any allies belonging to that corpse, anyway. They would not be a part of the Red Scarves if they could not handle a fight.

The two turned away from the body, and began to leave the scene. However, it was the yellowblood who stopped first. A sudden unease in the air, a heavy dread in the pit of their stomach. The jadeblood could feel it too.

“Wait. Something’s wrong.”

They heard a strange bubbling sound, and then something started to move behind them.

The corpse’s hands twitched first, then its feet, and then - as if being pulled upwards on invisible strings - it began to rise to its feet. Its movements were loose, arms flopping lazily by its sides and body bending uncomfortably far backwards before suddenly its entire torso lurched to the opposite side, head lolled forward entirely unsupported by its neck. Its hair had fallen out of the bun shape it had been tied into, the rain plastering waist-length locks to its skull and back.

Three light tinks could be heard as some small metallic objects hit the pier and bounced slightly.

It then began to straighten up to its full height, limbs now much sturdier and relaxed, and when it started to raise its head it was clear that the bullet holes had disappeared. Only a dark, inky liquid dripping down its face and neck and bleeding through the white lab coat was proof that such an injury had ever occurred. The same viscous liquid also appeared to be dribbling out of its open mouth, but its tongue twitched slightly before licking it away. It retreated its tongue back into its mouth, and its glassy eyes rolled from the back of its head.

It stared blankly for a long moment, and the two trolls stared back at it in horror, frozen in place. The corpse blinked slowly, one eyelid after the other before the body recalled that the action should be simultaneous, tilted its head to the side slightly in confusion, and then suddenly sprang back to life.

“Oh! Sorry! That was very strange of me. Haha. I’m afraid I blacked out a little! Now. Where were we?”

Vallis reached up and smeared the ink off his face, then looked down at his hand. Huh, how unusual! He was transfixed by the distinctly-not-blood-like fluid that seemed to have been splashed on him while he was unconscious, but his attention was drawn back when he heard one of the gang members screaming.

“Jesus fucking Christ! The fuck is that?! Get the fuck away from me, monster!” He pulled out his gun again and fired a couple more shots, but in his terror and without his partner’s psiionics they all missed their mark.

“Huh? A monster? Where?” Vallis looked around, but he couldn’t see anything. “Hm. Hm! Maybe you also hit your head? I can take a look at that.”

He smiled wide, flashing rows of sharp teeth. A smile that he thought was friendly, but to his assailants appeared more like a beast closing in on its prey. His tiny fins flared outwards, almost appearing as if they were glowing in the low light of the storm.

There was a sudden crack of lighting illuminating the sky, and revealing that the shadow under Vallis’ feet was not that of a troll, but a writhing mass of tentacles.

“Fucking hell!” The yellowblood grabbed the jadeblood’s shoulder, pupils no more than pinpricks and legs shaking. “Narano, we’re getting the fuck outta here! Move!”

The jadeblood barely registered his colleague pulling him away, almost collapsing to the floor. The two stumbled, dropped their weapons, and sprinted down the pier and into the darkness of the town, leaving Vallis standing alone. 

How strange! For a split second, Vallis thought he could feel their hearts pounding through the vibration in the air. His fins twitched as he started to hum in thought. 150BPM, towards the upper limit of a healthy vigorous exercise. An exciting, fast-paced melody. He wished he could have heard it for longer to confirm. 

Oh well. They’re gone now! He didn’t understand why. Didn’t they have a deal to make? But, he supposes that it is their loss. He has more important things to do! Still so many aquarium tanks to clean! And then he can return to his research! So much more exciting than talking to gangsters. Researching the specimen in the ocean took up so much of his time, and the thought of trying to find out if he could also hear its heartbeat made him thrum with happiness, the vibrations of his own voice tickling his fins and gills. If he could figure out how to get that close to it, he’s certain it would sound beautiful. 

[warriorsofsplatsville]

The clean up for Wahoo World wasn't pretty. The rebel Salmonid army left a distasteful green ooze coating the grounds of the park, but working together with the janitorial force of the amusement park, it was quick work.

"Nice job out there, Agent Three!" Jesse walked up to Mirage and gave them a hefty pat on their shoulder. "There are some damages to the park, so it'll be closed for a few days more, but other than that, it's been successfully defended with little injuries and zero casualties! So it's a job well done in my book!"

"Yeah, good." Mirage stretched. "We've been fighting for three days straight. I'm sore and I wanna eat something and go to bed."

"Don't worry, we're gonna let you guys take a vacation after all that hard work." He chuckled.

"Heeeeyy! When's MY break, Captain?!"

Jesse turned around, gasping a little. "H-Hey! You came!"

"Who?" Mirage looked over him to see who he was talking to.

"Keeping busy in the Splatlands, Jesse?" The pink squid laughed, approaching the two. "You hardly have any time to say hello to us!"

"Yeah, being Captain is hard work! I can't run back and forth between the desert and the city, you know! It's pretty far away!"

"Oho? Who's the new kid?" She walked to Mirage, leaning over slightly and scratching her chin while examining them. "Is this the one that you were penning me about? The one that's also royalty? Nice to meet ya!"

"Who are you??"

"Agent E. But everyone just calls me by my actual name, Emmy."

"E-Emmy?!" Mirage coughed, choking on the air they were just breathing. "Like- the famous Turf War player?! You're an agent?!"

"Wooow, sounds like I'm famous even out of town! I'm honored!!" She chirped. "Yep, same gal. Emmy Castellia, turf player and expert dualies main."

Then that means this is also Minu's grandmother in the future... Mirage gulped. Just from a quick glance around, Minu knew that as well: she was nowhere to be seen.

"This is the new Agent Three, Em." Jesse explained. "They're doing pretty well given they only joined us two months ago."

"Heh, I can see! Keep up the good work, kiddo! Cod, reminds me of the good old days. I remember being fifteen and doing agent work..."

"I guess you're inspecting, Emmy?" Jesse asked.

"Yep. Gotta file a report about this back at the cabin. If this turns into a repeat incident, we're gonna need references on it later." She nodded. "I have Theo and Octa doing rounds around the shoreline right now to make sure they're gone-gone."

"Thanks, Em...say, do you think you lot would be up to have a meal with us after? I'm sure all my agents are starving."

"Oh, yeah! I can ask Pris to get us a reservation at Stan's restaurant. He'd appreciate the business." She pulled out her smartphone. "Plus, I wanna get to know the new agent better! I can't wait to pry you open and see what you can offer!"

"Uh..."

"The job gets easier the more missions you go on. Trust me! Now let's get everyone into some clean clothes and out of here, I brought a ton of spares. Figure you might need them..." She held her nose.

"Yeah, thanks Emmy." Jesse laughed sheepishly.

[riskyrusky]

EPISODE 5

FINALLY! See Mike's pain and help him out! But of course Mike be moody. I get you Mike, but plssss. ohhh really liking those mecenary designs. And the paralells.

OH NOO Annie! Gosh darn it! You tell her Annie!

DOG NOOOO HOLY SHIT! IRENE HOW DARE! NO NO NO NO! FUck Guys get Dog! And Annie! SHIET! Oh i really don't like this.

oh i smell more backstory.

Also how dare you jsut throw her dog to the bird! That is awful! I do like the title cards having different elements in the middle for each episode. Lovely detail.

THE BIRD AGAIN1??!? CHARLIE!

Wait Bird friendshaped? Or maybe not. At least didn't eat him. And Dog and Charlie bonding. Lovely! Good thing. Dog needs pats.

And that is deep. Oh wow. And nice way of getting to know each other. Gotta love it. Love that he is smart but doesn't talk. Best type of human beast buddyship.

YOOOO KONG TIME! He jsut there at times and it is always really fucking intense. HOLY HECK HE IS HUGE

And good job Dog! Great job!

And Kong just chilling. And more backstory. Wow! So much teasing here!

Oh that bridge does not look save. Gosh darn. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP OUT MIKE!? HE NEEDS HELP!! THERE ARE STRIPY THINGIES ON HIS CHEST!

ALso what? FLying whale. WELL Flying WHALE ...that landed..not too gently. Is that kong dinner? DO WE GET KONG FIGHTING SQUID BATTLE?! I am so ready for that! Ye- MIIIIIKEE!!!!

NONONONO- and of course cliffhanger. HOW DARE

Skullisland and what I ramble

In the following I'll just throw all my thoughts about the episodes one after the other about SkullIsland down here. SOO SPoilers (Evidently) you have been warned! And just rambling ahead.

[sp00kworm]

Sensei, Sensei

Pairing: Kirishima Tooru x Female Reader 

Word Count: 3644

Warnings: Sexual Content, Unsafe sex, Closet Sex, Stranger Sex

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---

The summer air was warm against your skin as you walked along the pathways of the small city festival. This far out of the city, there wasn’t too many people walking around. It was far out, in one of the larger local parks, and you were glad to be away from the hustle and bustle for even just an evening. Thinking of the stress of your teaching job was enough to make your head hurt again. Children were difficult even when they were at their most well behaved. Snack time only did so much to sate twenty little humans, after all. You tried to ignore the idea as you looked over the skewers on a food stall. Most of it was seafood, and at least a quarter of it was seasoned squid, a favourite in the local area. There were far too many choices, and the stall owner sighed through his nose, forcing you to make a decision. One squid skewer in hand, and a few yen lighter, you headed past the rest of the food stalls and on towards the fun fair games, dodging the small children and couples, arm in arm, as you went. The last thing you needed was to knock over someone and have to spend time apologising, or worse, finding some kids parents because they were hurt.

 It was as though the universe was laughing at you it seemed.

 As you rounded the corner you slammed into someone. The little girl went flying, her red hair flopping over her face as she hit the floor with a soft thud. Her hands grazed the pebbles in the dirt, and you rushed to kneel down and get a good look at them. The girl’s large red eyes were watery, and you hushed her softly as you carefully brushed the grit from her grazes.

“I’m so sorry!” You rushed out before you reached for your handkerchief and a bottle of water. You wet the cloth before gently wiping her hands. Turning her palms back and forth, you were sure that she only had minor grazes. You sighed in relief.

“It’s okay, Miss…” The girl looked from her hands to your face, squirming uncomfortably before fresh tears dripped down her face, “A-Actually…I’ve lost Kirishima.”

“Kirishima?” You asked, “Is he your boyfriend?”

Her face went red, almost like a tomato, and the girl flapped for a moment before she shook her head vehemently, ‘no’.

A laugh made her startle, and you patted her head gently, “Sorry but you’re very sweet…ah, what is your name?”

The little girl pouted and sniffled before she wiped her eyes, “Yaeka.” She offered quietly.

“Well, Yaeka, how about I help you find Kirishima?” You offered before you wiped her face with the clean side of the handkerchief.

“You will?” Yaeka seemed to brighten a little as she took your hand and stood up.

 You dusted her knees gently before taking her hand firmly. It wasn’t the safest place for a child to be running around.

“Of course, I will! I can’t leave you here all alone…” You leaned in conspiratorially to whisper into her ear, “I’ve heard the fish monger is a goblin in disguise! You might get on his nerves!”

Yaeka startled, and looked over at the man, “Really?” She whispered.

“Oh yes. He’s even more upset because of the man who ruined the carnival game earlier!” You told her before pointing towards the exit where the seating area was.

“That was Kirishima!” She told you, her eyes bright with glee, “He told the man his game was bad! And he won me a big bunny!”

“Oh, so that was Kirishima? I bet he’s really cool, huh?” You asked with a smile.

Yaeka nodded her head as she followed you towards the benches, “Uhuh. I want to be as nice as Kirishima is one day.” She told you, her face red with embarrassment. You could only chuckle. It seemed as though she liked this man a lot.

 The seating area was relatively full, and you hummed, looking around before you asked Yaeka if she could spot Kirishima anywhere.

“No.” She pouted, upset, “I can’t see him anywhere.”

You thought for a moment before kneeling down, “How about you get on my shoulders, that way you might be able to point him out to me?”

“Maybe…” Yaeka nodded, “He’s very tall so we might be able to spot him.” She told you as she sat on your shoulders, peering around in the gloom.

“Where did you last see him?” You asked as you set off through the tables, “That might help us find him.”

Yaeka hummed, thinking as she glanced around, “I lost him on the hill…” She mumbled.

“Oh? Where the flavoured ices are?” You asked her. Yaeka nodded in response, and you turned to head towards the stalls again.

 “Little Lady!”

 Yaeka’s head whipped in the direction of the call, and you turned slowly, following her gaze along the top of the small grass hill.

“Little Lady! I told you not to run off.” The man called as he trotted down the hill, his blue hair flopping over his glasses. He smirked when he spotted you as well, his eyes giving you a once over, in a way which made you feel small. Within a few seconds, you knew he had a grasp on how much of a threat you were. He was tall, as Yaeka said, and he scooped her off your shoulders quickly before plonking her on the floor by his feet.

“Who is this, Little Lady?”

“Ah, this lady helped me find you, Kirishima!” She told him as he gripped her hand tight.

“Oh, did she?” Kirishima hummed as he offered his hand, lamely, “Then thanks. I was worried sick about her.”

You took a breath before you dared to take his hand, and his grip was strong as he shook your hand with his own. His palms were rough and calloused, and you swallowed at the peak of thick, black tattoos out of the bottom of his shirt.  

 The crisp outfit made you reconsider. The tattoos were the second give away, and you felt ice water run down your back as the pieces connected in your head. Yakuza. Kirishima smirked as your brain clicked into place, and he let your hand go before turning, Yaeka in hand, and waving.

“Thanks for finding her. The boss would have killed me for real this time if something happened to her.” Kirishima yawned as he walked away.

“Boss? You’re not her father?” You asked meekly.

Kirishima turned, his blue eyes flashing behind his glasses. There was a churning delight at the torture behind the glass lenses, though he would deny it if Sugihara asked him.

“No. I’m her babysitter.” Kirishima drawled before he cracked the fingers in his hands, “And if you have a problem with that then…”

“No!” You jumped in before smiling awkwardly, “I just think its…Well at least Yaeka has someone to come to this with, even if her father can’t make the time himself.”

 Kirishima took a moment to look you up and down again before his fanged smile was back, his head churning with possibilities, “Say, Little Lady? How about we invite your new friend over for dinner as a ‘thank you’ gift?”

Yaeka looked up with delight on her face, “Would Papa be okay with it?” She asked.

“Leave your old man to me.” Kirishima chuckled, “But how about we exchange numbers then?”

Your guts churned, telling you it was a bad idea, “Sure.” You replied still, opening your phone to type in Kirishima’s number despite the uneasy feeling he radiated. You let him type his number in and scowled at the silly rose on the end of it before Yaeka interrupted your train of thought.

“Thank you for helping me, miss.” She bowed and smiled.

“You’re most welcome, Yaeka.” Your heart melted a little, but it was quickly put back together as Kirishima laughed and smirked between the two of you.

“How cute, Little Lady, you have a new friend!” He teased her.

Yaeka huffed, pouting before she took his hand and dragged him up the hill, ignoring his jabs at her blush before they were both out of sight and blended back into the crowds of the festival.  

 A message the next day came to you while the children were on lunch. You looked up from your marking to check your phone. The message was from Kirishima.

‘The boss has invited you for dinner.’

Short. It was almost rude in its tone, and you scowled at the screen before it beeped again.

‘Its Kirishima by the way. Dinner is at seven. Looking forwards to seeing you again, teacher lady.”

You couldn’t think of a reply which didn’t sound rude, so instead, you replied with a confirmation and went back to eating, shovelling rice into your mouth around marking the workbooks you had left to get through. Another text message popped through at the end of lunch, but you ignored it as you put away your lunch boxes and headed out into the yard to go and collect your class. The phone, left on silent, continued to buzz, unknowingly, in the bottom of your bag, for the rest of the afternoon as you taught, and eventually finished for the day. You only looked again as you finished, packing your marking to take home over the weekend. Your phone lit up with the notifications. You had twelve messages, all from Kirishima. The man had messaged you at least twice an hour since lunch time, and you blinked at the innate, random messages, and the mess of fanged emojis before replying that you would see him later on.

 ‘Finally, you respond.’

Kirishima snarked a few more messages as you continued to ignore him. With a scoff, you left his messages unread as you debated not showing at all. The family were no doubt dangerous and notorious, but you had to pay your respects to Yaeka’s true father. He had invited you, so it would be rude to ignore his request. You sighed as you got home and laid your marking on your table. Looking over the books, you sighed, knowing you needed to finish it before you went out for dinner. Another job to do. With a large sigh, you went to get a drink, get changed, and get started on the marking before you had to go to dinner. You cracked your arms and threw your blanket over your shoulders as you collected your pens, and got started marking the maths workbooks, dreading the buzzing noise of your phone in your bag.

 Kirishima’s harassment halted in the evening, and you marked your books without any hassle before you rushed to get showered and changed into something more formal. There was only enough time to quickly get ready and you headed out a little late to get to the residence that Kirishima had messaged you. You arrived in the area, looking at the men stood outside, their jackets hiding the leather harnesses strapped to them. Guns and knives were no doubt hidden beneath the fabric, and you had no will to find out. Instead, you avoided looking the men in the eyes as you headed to the gate, raising a fist to knock. One of them lit his cigarette before he stopped your fist with his palm and a sneer.

“What are you doing here?” He asked as he blew smoke out of the side of his mouth.

“Uh…I’m here to see...” You struggled to remember the name of Yaeka’s father, floundering under the man’s intense gaze before he was shoved away from you.

“She’s here to see the boss, Hiruguma, so keep your hands off.” Kirishima snarked as he pushed open the gate for you, dressed in trousers and a shirt, but this time he had a navy tie and a black suit jacket on as well.

 There was a brief moment where you registered just how handsome Kirishima was. His hair was properly styled, his glasses polished and his eyes cold and sharp. He almost seemed like a mobster out of a cheesy romance movie. His blue eyes turned down and you flinched as he smirked and nodded his head for you to enter first.

“After you, teacher.” Kirishima teased, delighted at the scowl he got in return as you stepped through the gate and onto the grounds. The yakuza lacky followed you with a smile, unsettlingly quiet as he directed you through the well-kept gardens towards the large traditional house. It was enormous. The whole complex screamed wealth, and you kept in mind the potential shady business they were involved with as Kirishima opened you the door to the house itself.

“You look lovely tonight.” He told you, out of the blue, as you stooped to take off your shoes in the entranceway.

 A flash of red took over your vision before you turned, clad in the slippers and snarled at him, “Thank you for telling me for the fiftieth time, Mister Kirishima.” You snapped, “Its not like your provocative messages and constant harassment of me in working hours didn’t tell me that much!”

“Oi, oi,” Kirishima frowned, “What’s with the anger? I was just interested in what you do and get up to!” He tutted, “I can’t let just anyone meet with Yaeka and the Boss, you know.”

“What? So, harassing me all day was to make sure I wasn’t going to hurt your precious criminal leader?!” You fumed before you took a step forward and thumped the man in the chest, “Why would I help a little girl find you if I was going to do something to her! Use your damn brain you…” You jumped as Kirishima’s lips cut you off. The man kissed you, his long, strong hands wrapped around the bottom of your back, cupping the arch as you leaned into him and kissed back, taking the opportunity to run your own hands over his shoulders and down his spine.

 Kirishima made a soft noise before he pulled away, fangs poking out of the bottom of his top lip as he licked away your combined spit. He looked at you, admiring the bruised cushion of your bottom lip before he grinned and dragged you by the hand into the side corridor of the house, pulling you along behind him.

“And here I thought you hated me, teacher.” Kirishima teased as he dragged you into a utility room. He shut the door with a slam of one large hand and slid you up against the wall, his jacket already off his shoulders as he teased the band of your bottoms, tugging the fabric gently as he crowded your space and sent your head spinning. He smelt of heavy cologne and the undertone of metal. He was dangerous, and you snapped your palms up in front of you, stopping him from pressing his front to yours as he leaned in for another bruising kiss.

“Ah?” He asked, perplexed, “What’s wrong? Ah, did I misread this whole thing because…”

“Shut up.” You hissed at him before you dragged him down by the tie, kissing him again, “You’re infuriating but…handsome and…”

“Say no more, I get the idea.” Kirishima preened under the praise and compliments before he leaned back in to continue where you both left off.

 A rush of blood to your head led your hands down to the bottom of his shirt. You tugged his shirt out of his bottoms, hiking the cotton up his hard stomach so you could get a feel at his skin. He was hot, almost clammy, but you ignored it as you meandered back down to the button on his trousers, undoing it. Kirishima’s eyes opened before he looked down and smirked, tugging his trousers open for you to have a feel before he had his hands up your skirt and between your legs, feeling the hot skin.

“Gosh, teacher, you’re wet down there.” Kirishima purred as he stroked his fingers over your panties, enjoying the way you gasped before he dipped a finger underneath the elastic and swiped at you, feeling the wetness cling to the tip of his finger. You gasped and moaned softly before Kirishima’s other hand came up to silence you.

“Careful…” He purred, “You don’t want anyone to hear you, do you?” He hummed, “Unless you want them to find us? I never knew a teacher could be such a pervert.”

With a shuddering breath you shoved the man down a little, “Shut it, Kirishima or I swear I’ll…”

 The abusive poison you had lined up left your mind as Kirishima got on his knees, his cock straining at his underwear where his trousers were open, but his eyes focused on you above him. He smiled before he licked his lips and ducked his head under your skirt, dragging your tights and your underwear down far enough so he could fit himself between your thighs. You gasped as his fingers gripped the meat of your thighs, dragging you against the wall before he blew a warm breath over your heated, sensitive skin. You tried not to moan as he rumbled against your thigh, trembling with anticipation before he drew back far enough that he could look you in the eyes.

“Thank you for the meal.” He whispered against your skin before he plunged his face between your legs, his tongue pressing between your folds, dragging upwards to circle your clitoris. With a breathy moan, you grasped Kirishima’s hair, and pressed your hips forwards as he teased your clit and pushed his fingers inside of you, slowly, one a time, stretching you open.

“You’re so tight.” Kirishima hummed as he rolled your skirt and got you to hold it out of the way. You bit your lip as he looked you in the eyes and dragged his tongue over you, the flat of it pressing against as much skin as he could get. He reached your clitoris again and swirled a few times before he drew the flesh into his mouth and sucked, gently at first, then harsh, in a vicious pull of his cheeks.

 “Kirishima…” You moaned as you dragged his blue hair out of place. The man didn’t respond, instead he pushed two fingers inside of you again, pinning you to the wall as his assault made your toes curl. The slippers on your feet fell off as you moaned against your hand, bucking against Kirishima’s face before he grumbled and pulled away. Your orgasm fizzled away, and you moaned, upset as Kirishima stood up, his knees cracking before he had you against the wall again. He pinched your cheeks together before he smiled, his slick chin shining in the dim light of the bare bulb of the utility room. With a purr he kissed you, his tongue stroking your own, allowing you to have a taste of yourself. It was sour against your tongue, but not disgusting, the taste hidden by the taste of cigarette and mint in Kirishima’s mouth.

“Are you gonna…” You started before Kirishima covered your mouth. Footsteps clicked past the door, along with the gruff voices of several other members. Two stood outside the door, having a hushed conversation, and you squirmed in upset. Kirishima smirked before he spread your legs again and sucked a mark on your neck. With a brush of his hand, he had his cock in his hand and slid it inside of you, guiding it before he kissed you again, keeping you silent as his length slid, slowly inside of you, brushing the sensitive spot inside of you that made your head swim.

 Kirishima’s lip went white as he bit it, stifling his own noise as he bottomed out, pressed flushed against your hips, his cock twitching inside of you. The rush from potentially being caught, and the feeling of Kirishima’s hot cock inside of you made your stomach clench and your walls flutter in a rush of a soft orgasm, and you moaned into his mouth as you clenched your thighs and tried to ride his dick. He groaned softly into your hair at the feeling before he grabbed your hips and started a soft rhythm, careful not to make too much noise. It didn’t take the two men outside long to walk away, leaving the hallway beside you quiet.

“You’re a real pervert, aren’t you, teacher?” Kirishima cooed before he started to thrust in earnest, his hips slapping against yours as he chased his own high, desperate for it as you clenched around him again. He watched as you dumbly rubbed between your own legs, swiping at your clitoris fast enough to build another orgasm.

 “Are you going to cum?” Kirishima asked as he squeezed your backside, “Are you going to be quiet?”

You nodded, feeling the fluttering of your walls as Kirishima grinned, thrusting harder as he chased his own high, “Please Kirishima. I wanna cum…” You whispered against his ear as you moaned softly, hushing yourself with your palm again as you pinched your clit and flinched, your orgasm washing over you. Kirishima swore as you clenched tight and rushed to pull out as his cum painted the insides of your thighs, coating your tights and underwear. He panted as he admired the look, watching the pearly rivulets run over your skin and drip onto the floor. You moaned softly as he pulled your underwear back up and scowled as he laughed.

“Think you’re ready for the dinner party, teacher? Or would you like round two?” He teased before you smacked your elbow against his ribs.

“Shut up, Kirishima or so help me I’ll…” You threatened as you straightened your skirt.

“You’ll give me a kiss and promise to call me?” Kirishima batted his eyelashes.

“Something like that…” You muttered as he laughed at you.