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No One's to Blame (But it would be easier if there was) - A Sloose Fic
In 1989, at Bradley's seventh birthday party, Goose feels less than happy now he has to deal with his conflicted feelings about his and Carole's divorce. Ron comes to help in the weirdest way.
~~~
For a prompt list, this one was 'A getting B to dance at a party'
Words: 1240
Children's laughter filled the room as kids ran about high on sugar. Nick had a headache only partially from the shrieking and obnoxiously loud music. The other reason was almost definitely because this would be the longest he and Carole had been in a room together since the divorce.
It wasn't ugly, persay, but it didn’t end well. It had been a slow decline after he became a TOPGUN instructor, they’d had a dream to finally be a family together for years but the dream must have been too far away. Goose got busier and busier balancing work and trying to keep Mav in line so they didn’t get moved to a different deployment. Bradley starting school had seemed to be a way for Carole to get more independence but only became more stressful as she tried to juggle being a mother and more hours at work, the Navy somehow decided that Goose didn’t need time with his son.
And soon, the family dream they’d had fell to shatters. Goose was drowned in work and was away from them almost as much as he had been on deployment. Carole fell into loneliness as she was pulled in so many directions that she was lost beneath the layers. Somewhere along the road their love began to fade, they tried date nights but they always fell short and there seemingly wasn’t enough time for them to go away together.
By 1987, Goose knew he wasn’t in love with her anymore. His heart was slowly becoming to belong to Slider. But he was more than earnest enough to know not to cheat on Carole, even if their relationship was becoming more like they were parents to Bradley than husband and wife to each other.
He knew he had to break it to her at some point. Guilt was flooding him more and more every time he looked at her because he could see in her eyes that she still held out hope that they would carry on, that they’d get through this and be like they used to. Goose didn’t. The way she’d cried had broken his heart more than he could ever admit to her.
From there, it had been too painful for either of them to be near each other. Goose felt too guilty and Carole couldn’t see past the pain he’d caused. She’d told him that he was to blame for all of this, that he let go too soon and had no faith but every time they came to an altercation he knew she didn’t truly believe that. Carole wasn’t one to hold grudges.
It had hurt. Really hurt. Hurt to let someone go who’d been there through so much, hurt to see all their care and love go down the drain when it had been so passionate. But for all the pain he’d felt, like a million tiny paper cuts every time he realised that that consistency was gone forever, he felt free. He was giving it a go with Ron and so far their secret was safe.
Carole had yet to find this freedom. By the look of her from across the party, she still had that echoing loneliness in her eyes that she did when he handed her the divorce papers. He couldn’t comfort her like she needed, that love was long gone now, but it was hard to watch her plaster on a fake smile whenever Bradley or one of his friends ran past. He wondered if she’d fallen back on the bad habits she had around when her dad died.
“Hey, dumbass, you listening to me?” Ron said, next to him.
“What?”
“I said, I didn’t know kids could be so loud.”
Nick chuckled around his glass of fruit punch, it was ridiculously sugary, and turned to him. He was wearing some band t-shirt with dark blue jeans that made all his muscles pop. It was strange to see him surrounded by bright balloons and confetti, it was so against his tough aesthetic it was almost funny, but not enough, there was still guilt too heavy in his heart to let him laugh.
“You have three sisters, how do you not know kids can be loud at parties?”
“I never went to their parties, I thought girl’s parties were lame,”
“Lame?” Nick said. “God, that’s such a middle school word, honestly.”
A smile flickered onto his face. Then his eyes fell onto Carole again and he was pulled back down.
Ron’s hand rested on his shoulder. His tough exterior melted as he tried to shift his gaze away from his ex-wife.
“What’s wrong, hey?”
“What’s wrong?” Nick retorted. “I’m at my son’s seventh birthday party which I didn’t even know I’d be invited to, by the way, and all I can see is how heartbroken my ex-wife is and how it’s all my fault.”
Ron’s kind arm turned to a shove as he fully turned his gaze to him and not Carole. His forehead crinkled as his agitation became apparent, not toward Carole, he was never mean toward her, but for the situation. Nick wished he could be agitated by how things had turned out, when all he felt was a sickness by how he’d fucked things up.
“You listen to me, Nicky, okay?” Goose nodded as Ron’s hands squeezed his arms. “You told me there was no love there anymore, you loved someone else and didn’t want to lead Carole on when she could have someone that loved her, and it wouldn’t have been healthy if you forced yourself to stay there.
“So stop feeling bad about something that ended up being a good decision just because you both haven’t recovered yet, okay? Things take time.”
Nick stopped for a second. That made a lot of sense, it always did from an outside source. But his eyes drifted back to Carole and the guilt came back.
“I guess,” he said. “But can’t it get better sooner, even if she’s not my wife anymore, I still want to make her feel better.”
Ron huffed out a laugh, “Can you stop being such a Mother Goose and start thinking about yourself?”
That made him laugh. He liked the way Ron’s face lit up when he did. Something like gold sparkles that shot through his tanned skin. It was in moments like this that he forgot all the pain of the divorce and just revelled in how good this guy made him feel. If this was what was awaiting him after he got over the divorce, he was looking forward to it. And maybe that was the first step.
“Look, what would make you cheer up, huh? What can I do?” Ron jabbed his elbow into his ribs lightly.
Nick thought for a second then heard the song change. All the kids ran to the dancefloor as they recognised it. As he realised what was going on, a smile grew on his face and he turned to Ron.
“No.” Ron said, catching on.
“You asked what you could do?”
“I am not dancing to the YMCA, Goose.”
He continued to smile at him, even batted his eyelashes. Ron groaned and handed him his drink. He made sure he had enough space to move and rolled his eyes when the chorus came along. As he heard the lead into the chorus, he wished he had a camera. Ron’s face was enough to make him forget his guilt.
I always feel conflicted about writing Sloose because either it's poly/open relationship with GooseCarole, Carole's just not in it (which makes me sad because no Carole :( or Bradley) or Goose and Carole separate for some reason. So, in this, I made them get divorced. I may have made this more about their divorce but I feel like it's because I'm a child of divorce and often people say "maybe they got a divorce" as if it's such an easy and casual thing to go through emotionally, even if it's a mutual decision or relatively 'good'. So, yeah, they're both hurting here but I tried to show how it will get better, they eventually make peace and start to get along as they find other people and move on.
Thanks for reading!
#top gun#nick goose bradshaw#ron slider kerner#sloose#nick bradshaw#ron kerner#goose top gun#goose bradshaw#slider top gun#slider kerner#bear writes#divorce#post divorce#divorced goosecarole#past goosecarole#fluff#angst#hurt/comfort#goose lives#nick bradshaw lives#a gets b to dance at a party#bradley bradshaw#bradley rooster bradshaw#rooster bradshaw#rooster top gun#carole bradshaw
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It starts with "I don't like sex that much" and evolves, in the next two years and half, in "I'd like to have a child, would you like that?", in the same way that starts with "it's just for tonight Sli', don't get your hopes up" and evolves in "we're going to be dads!" the day Carole's first sonogram shows a little human who's growing in Carole's belly.
it goes all the way of Carole and Goose being twenty years old and in love to the point the elope the morning after Goose proposes. Mav is their only witness and the chapel they get married is so pretty Carole cries because it's absolutely perfect;
and it's not like Goose doesn't know Carole doesn't really like sex but loves kissing him and sometimes, when the mood strikes and she is giggling because her lips are puffy and a little red for all the kisses they exchanged, her hand finds her way under his pants and boxers and it's embarrassing how fast Goose cums the first time that happens. She may not like sex but Goose has always the face and the expression of a person who got laid for hours and everyone is every squadron Goose is, is envious because nobody has a wife who's better than Carole;
They talked about kids in the two years they were dating because they were already thinking about building a future so they talked almost about everything. "We could adopt" Goose has suggested to which Carole had answered "if we're going to have a kid I think I'd like to carry them. We're going to find the way Goosie, but now take my out to dance!" And the conversation pretty much died there. Until two years and half later and Carole gets down for breakfast and "it's time" to a still half asleep Goose. "Honey I get it, I really do, but we can't just throw him out!", "throw who out?", "Maverick! You said it time, but you should at least give the guy a warning!", to Carole laughing because "you silly Goose, I'm talking about having a baby, not throwing Mav out of here." The coffee stain on the floor is still visible, if one looks at the floor really carefully;
Slider is there before everything, before Carole's too and it's not like he's going to put himself in the middle or anything but when she invites him to a nice diner how can he say no? He misses spending time with Goose without all the deployment bullshit and the way Ice is a step away from snapping and biting (or kissing) Maverick. He chooses his best shirt, of a nice orange and Ice lends him his car. He pats him on the back and "see you in the morning" with the knowing look of who already knows it all, even when Slider is sure he knows nothing. But that's Iceman Kazansky for you, seven steps in front of everyone;
The dinner is chatty and Carole puts herself in the middle of the two of them when they change scenery to get a drink. "We need to ask you a favoure" Carole says, against his ear after ordering their drinks. Slider finds himself humming back because Carole is a magnetic presence and he would probably give her the moon, if they could spend enough time together for her to actually convince him to. "I need you to fuck Goose for a little while because he's a little out of practice and we want to have a baby". Now, rationally, Slider knows that's not what Carole said, word by word, but that's most of what his brain gets because Carole is sweet talking to him and Goose's fingers are playing with the hair his neck and the bastard knows that's his weak point. And so it's starts;
The first time they have the house just for them Goose says "it's just for tonight, don't get your hopes up" and Slider is a second away to leave because isn't it exactly what Goose said the first time they kissed, back in high school, when they were fourteen and scared shitless to be seen? But Slider stays, move towards Goose, cups his face and kisses him hello, goodbye and I missed you, all together. Goose kisses him back in the same way. Slider doesn't asks what's the deal between him and Carole and him being "out of pratice" because who gives a fuck when Goose's hands are under his shirt and the bed is soft under is back?;
It's not a one time thing, but Slider never stays after until he does and he wakes up with Carole cuddling between them, he face mushed against his neck and Goose arms around her and trying to touch him at the same time. It's the first time he stays over for breakfast and the first time Carole kisses him before going to work;
Ice asks if he should find somebody else, considering he's never around and Slider flips him the bird before nagging him to admit the house isn't as quiet or empty as he wants Slider to believe;
Then Carole throws her arms around Slider, a random night in a civil bar where nobodies knows she is married to Goose or who they are, and "Hey stud" and kisses him. She kisses him in the same way she kisses Goose and in which Goose kisses him. That night Slider discovers that sex has so many different forms and sometimes isn't as conventional as he thought it would be but plastered between Goose and Carole he doesn't really care;
They talk, the morning after and for most of the afternoon, about where they are going, what they want, about how they will fit and about so many other things they tire each other out to the point they falls asleep in a sort of cuddle pile and Ice and Mav find them on the couch, hour after, because they're late for they weekly dinner. Ice kisses Mav's cheek before closing the door behind him because "it's better if we let them sleep, but they will pay for the next one". Mav laughs because "next time we are going out for burgers and milkshake, the fancy shit doesn't really cut with me, even if it's only once a week."
It takes a while because after that it seems like life is trying to pull them in seven different direction all the same and they already almost sure it's going to take time because that's what all her friends tell to Carole and so they start trying, then they stop and start again and after six months is getting frustrating because it doesn't seem to work in anyway they try. Then they are going to separate deployment, half of Slider and Goose's stuff isn't ready yet, somebody passed Carole off that day and there's dinner to make, laundry to fold and they as ready to snap as ever will and it's probably when it happens or not. But the morning after they're still in bed, both Slider and Goose's back are stretch red and Carole is sporting two almost identical hitches on both side of her neck. Slider and Goose are shipped out and two months later Carole is calling them both, different hours and different carriers, to tell them she is pregnant. And then is Goose calling Slider to tell him "we're going to be dads" and Ice swears he never used so many tissues to calm Slider down. They all celebrate, in their own way, in different parts of the world. They don't know anything about this baby and they are already the more loved creature off the globe.
#polyamourous with an asexual partner#nick goose bradshaw#carole bradshaw#ron slider kerner#ace!carole#goosecarole#slooserole#past!sloose#icemav#i'm going around with this since this morning
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AO3 First Lines Tag Game
tagged by @pollyna (thank you so much for tagging me love!!)
Rules: Share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written fewer than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway.
Here we go----
Hangman's Good Plan (complete, Top Gun, icemav, hangster)
Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin never feels nervous. No, negative, not in a million years. So when he stands out of the office of Admiral Kazansky - the COMPACFLT - in his best suit, his forehead sweaty, he regards his crazy heartbeat as…positively wound up, yeah.
2. Icarus (complete, Top Gun, icemav)
Ice has known the story of Icarus since he was eight. He still remembers the day when his father told him the myth in his stern way.
3. The Black cat (complete, Top Gun, icemav)
After they moved in together, Maverick found a little stray black cat in their backyard and immediately decided to adopt it. Ice just rolled his eyes and said he had no interest in fluffy animals, refusing to pet its head when the cat rubbed against his leg.
4. Plans (complete, Top Gun, icemav)
Maverick never makes plans. He bases his judgment entirely on intuition. He didn't plan anything, excited at the randomness and freedom. He is flying both in the sky and on the ground.
5. Where Past and Future are Gathered (WIP, Top Gun, icemav, goosecarole, hangster)
Rooster leans forward on his chair and keeps his eyes firmly ahead. Cyclone is going on and on about tomorrow’s mission, some shit like patriotism or sacred duty, maybe. He lost concentration a long time ago but still fixes his gaze on the sturdy admiral, even when his mind is blurred by the tedious speech and meaningless lip movement.
6. Then I Open my eyes and see you (WIP, Top Gun, icemav, goosecarole)
“Wallpaper?”Pete Mitchell, endearingly called by his close friends (or friend, honestly, who is walking beside him right now) as “Maverick”, takes the cup of iced black coffee from Nick Bradshow, or “Goose”, co-founder of M+G Design Ltd.
7. 轮廓 (complete, Top Gun, icemav, Chinese)
Iceman非常讨厌派对和聚会,特别是那些需要他和上级们社交的活动——他很不情愿。虽然,他是个年轻的雄心勃勃、前途无量的海军中校,但他还是憎恨这些互动。
8. Moonlight, Sunshine, and Baby you are Mine (WIP, Top Gun, Brooklyn-Nine-Nine, icemav, peraltiago, background goosecarole)
“Room 99, 99…” Pete Mitchell - or, as he prefers, Maverick - walks down the hallway, murmuring to himself, his blue rucksack hanging off one shoulder. He peeks at the door beside him and shakes his head. “Come on, Goose. We are not there yet.”
9. Be my Love in the Rain (complete, Top Gun, icemav, goosecarole)
It was raining outside. Or, more accurately, it was raining buckets, and the said buckets had the same capacity as the Amazon. Ice glanced at his watch again, surprised that it had only been five minutes since he last checked the time - feeling like a century already. The world was blurred and hazy out of the windshield, all the objects blending together like watercolours.
10. Season of joy, Season of Love (WIP, Lord of the Ring, Faramir/Eowyn)
My dearest Faramir, Winter is approaching - I can feel it from the chill in the air and the water. This morning I woke up and found my feet freezing. I have to ask Holdwyn to add logs in the fireplace - can you believe it, my dear? I never feared coldness before.
No pressure tag: @abliafina-18782 @derpinathebrave (and anyone who is interested!!! Sorry my brain has abandoned me and I can't even think properly right now...)
#❤️#icemav#iceman x maverick#tom iceman kazansky#pete maverick mitchell#hangster#jake hangman seresin#bradley rooster bradshaw#top gun#top gun 1986#top gun: maverick#tagging game#first lines tagging game
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A True Gentleman - A GooseCarole fic
Carole's cold, Nick is a gentleman
~~~
For a prompt list, this was "A notices B's cold and offers them their jacket"
Words: 356
It shocked him how cold it could get in California at night. Now the summer was getting hotter, he expected the night to be unbearable. But no, as they stood outside waiting for the taxi, he could feel Carole shivering slightly as she huddled under the arm he'd thrown over her shoulders.
The road was quiet as cars rolled past. None of which was their taxi. They blurred around the edges from the speed and the drink. He could really go for a burger right about now, something big and greasy to soak up the booze.
Carole's head dropped onto his shoulder. Glancing down, he realised she was slowly falling asleep. Goosebumps were still covering her arms.
He jostled her awake, she groaned. Her hair tickled the bare skin where his collar ended.
"Hey," his words were slightly slurred. "You want my jacket?"
She looked up at him with hooded eyes. They'd both had a lot to drink, it was her first proper night out in months, and he was excited to show her off to the other guys. They'd gotten along swimmingly, she'd got them dancing, Mav got the shots in and it all went downhill from there.
"Yes please," she whispered. "Such a gentleman."
He took his arm off her and slid off his jacket. The cold sank in immediately. His drunk brain found it hilarious that he, Goose, had goosebumps.
Carole snuggled into the jacket and let herself fall onto his shoulder. Before she fell almost-asleep again, the taxi pulled up, and once it stopped, he did what a true gentleman would do by opening the door.
She slid into the backseat, he followed after her and Mav squeezed in next to her. The other guys had their own taxis waiting, so they closed the door with a wave and felt the car pull away.
Carole began to fall asleep against his shoulder again. He embraced her from the side. Mav dropped onto his other shoulder and Goose got a feeling of dread when he realised he'd have to fight off sleep to make sure they got home safely and paid the driver.
Short and sweet! I finally got my loves GooseCarole! Also everyone's tired drunks, and Goose is a good pillow. Thanks for reading!
#goosecarole#nick goose bradshaw#carole bradshaw#top gun#bear writes#goose top gun#nick bradshaw#goose bradshaw#sharing clothes#a giving b their jacket#fluff#goose x carole#carolegoose#carole x goose#top gun (1986)#pete maverick mitchell#pete mitchell#maverick top gun#maverick mitchell
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