#para:pivotal

[feyxzhixin]

Pivotal || LZH +HKJ

@feykijung 8 months and twelve days ago... Sometimes loss for a hunter isn’t as valiant and colored in red as one would expect. In reality it could be a variety of things that could take down someone with the respected mantel on their name and Zhixin was always aware of this; in the swirling miasma of his past he’s captured the teachings and the stories of people disappearing into the night without a trace, sometimes even becoming a part of the night. However the tales wanted to paint over the grief they managed to, and like a child, he devoured every line and committed it to memory. Like a child, he walked on the earth thinking he wouldn’t have to come face to face with the biggest threat to their pathetically mortal lives: loss in its unrelenting authenticity, its bare bones, it’s shattering simplicity. 

It happens fast and reality doesn’t yield to it. Time doesn’t stop. The rest of the world remains utterly untouched through every agonizing second he experiences and when he chokes one the sound of their name, he can clearly hear bustle of the city just outside their reach. His only friend is depleted into the pavement and no one cares in that instant but him, no one notices the loss but him. The loneliness of this moment makes his head fill with helium, even the sound of his own heartbeat ricocheting inside his ears feels disconnected, taunting.  Instinct is what brings him to his feet faster than his emotions wanted to allow, it’s what scoops the warmth of his only friend into his arms and forces him to not think about all of the times he’s been held or nudged or supported by theirs. Years upon years in his psyche of survival tactics forced him to logically think about how no unknowing doctor or emergency service could save or explain the the narrowing of a soul within a body, the transcendent magic that could leave them physically unscathed and still beyond repair. Were the being in their arms to just be some unlucky and innocent victim to the abnormalities of this world, this would mean an inevitable end — but he knows now, as devastatingly clear as day, this wasn’t the case. Just like him, they were shackled to the formalities of a life they tried so hard to suppress.  So as if by nature, Zhixin takes them home.