#palpatine wanted to kill the beast to make armor for the clones to end the war faster and padme wanted to protect the beast

[onlycleverinmyhead]

I hate you stories where there's a choice between destroying one semi sentient creature and letting millions die and the choice to save the creature is presented as the good and correct one, I hate you stories that try to say all life has equal value by having one creature be more important than everybody else I hate you I hate you I hate you

[newswcanonprompts]

Skywalkers are immortal eldritch fucks (there’s so many ways this can go)

1. How does being half-force affect Anakin as a force ghost

Anakin... wasn't properly dead. just a bit too present, a bit too lively, and that if only someone pulled hard enough on the veil, he could be made to bleed again.

Anakin just keeps coming back to life, And so do Luke and Leia when they die.

"You've done it, you've killed Anakin fucking Skywalker. Wait, why is he standing behind you? Where's his body gone? Oh fuck, what is that expression? Oh no!"

This happens to Vader and terrifies the f*ck out of literally everyone

the man is the son of the Force, yes? how could he "become one with it" if he basically already was part of it? or at least, made of it?

It'd be either kinda horrifying or basically a regenerate-your-limbs get out of jail free card

Anakin turns up in Luke's temple one day, like "hey turns out I can't die"

Luke is just happy to have a Dad

imagine the backlash if that little factoid ever went public. "What do you mean Darth Vader can't die???"

"You mean he's alive right now????"

Obi-Wan realising he can't have a peaceful retirement in the afterlife because Anakin's apparently immortal now

Anakin starts trying to figure out how to make Obi wan immortal too

Ahsoka is so confused at everything

"You look a lot like the Hero with No Fear from the Clone Wars. Are you his grandson or something?" 

"Nope, I am him." 

"Freaking weird Jedi and their not aging."

 2. how terrifying it would have been if during the Dooku fight in AOTC his arm just regrew the moment it was cut off

3. them realizing this during the clone wars: CHECKMATE BITCHES

imagine the propaganda if there was a General who literally couldn't die

the Seperatists wouldn't know which way was up anymore

Anakin realised he had this sort of ability during the clone wars it would be hilarious to see him just throwing himself at things

he could protect his men better

Imagine how distressing it would be for a shiny to just see their general die and then come back seconds later

And Rex being like "Yep, the general does that."

just rubbing his eyes. and being completely done

Imagine the bitching sessions with Cody "At least yours resurrects! Mine just runs off without his kriffing lightsaber and armor all the time!"

clone boys have a heart attack whenever their general just decides to regrow limbs

rex faints the first time he sees anakin's arm grow back.

instead of the whole "my general keeps losing his lightsaber" it becomes "my general keeps losing his arm"

"My general keeps dying."

"Oh, how many have you been assigned to now?"

"No, no, he gets better again afterwards."

the 501st never tell the shinies that their general is immortal because the vets like to fuck around like that

it's kind of a right of passage for shinies to almost have a heart attack when the general comes back from the dead

Anakin is basically just the "if all else fails" option at that point because no matter what happens to him, he will be back at the temple annoying the hell out of everyone before dinner time

Anakin gets mortally wounded and is like "Well, I'll see you in five."

Droids: * shoot Anakin *

 * Anakin: * dies * 

Anakin, 5 minutes later in the middle of a crowd of droids: SURPRISE BITCHES!! * Murders them all *

Anakin dying to Dooku at the end of Attack of the Clones and then coming back and Dooku just being like "Fuck this shit I'm out."

him coming back and chasing dooku with his arm

Imagine the moment they find out Anakin can come back from the dead:

Ahsoka and Obi-Wan just sobbing their hearts out and then suddenly he's behind them like "Hey, bold of you to presume I'm mortal."

He pulls a Percy Jackson, and walks into his funeral.

mace windu utters a quiet "are you fucking kidding me"

next time anakin dies, his funeral includes a "welcome home anakin" banner

Mace stops letting the Yoda Lineage have funerals because they don't stay dead

They keep having funerals for Anakin just as an excuse to have a party

what if politicians don't know this. like the first time he dies during the war, and all the diplomats are there. Except Padme. She knows all and is just there to see the chaos.

They're usually private funerals, so they can keep inviting new people to screw with

"general skywalker just died"

"senator he's right here"

"i saw him die protecting me right before my eyes"

"senator do you need the healers?"

Obi-Wan, just watched Anakin go splat at the bottom of a ravine:

“ANAKIN!!”

Anakin, popping back into the mortal coil just behind him: “Yeah? What's up?”

obi-wan finding out about a Anakins thing and keeping it a secret,

so one day anakin dies and the whole council is like, mourning

obi-wan is just rolling his eyes and saying “it’s fine he’ll be back”

everyone thinks obi-wans having a mental breakdown

but then anakin walks into his funeral with a cup of caf and sunglasses and flashes everyone a peace sign

All of Yoda’s lineage (except dooku) and padme know.

"can you guys not cover me in white next time? it's pretty boring"

"can i get, like, glitter? is that a thing? make it a thing"

Skywalkers can also breath in space.

They just don’t have to breathe. 

4. THE FORCE IS A PROACTIVE PARENT IN THIS (AND AGENDER) (THEY/THEM PRONOUNS)

during the time it takes for him to resurrect, the force and anakin talked.

Bc that's the only time he could talk with a tangible parent.

he learns about palps that way

one time Anakin dies twice in one day

turns out the ability has a bit of a cooldown time so everyone's just panicking a bit because he should be back by now

then he appears like three days later

Obi-Wan's like "You bastard."

"Gotta keep you on your toes."

Really his parent just wanted some more time with him, and who was he to refuse?

a cracky! anakin basically having annual dinners with The Force because of how often he dies in the clone wars

in this verse the clone wars was created so Anakin & his parent The Force can have family dinners

Mortis, but instead of All That Nonsense, it's just a nice episode of meet the parent

padme dies, and then at her funeral she comes back, but force sensitive.

force sensitive, immortal, padme amidala. The seppies are going DOWN

The Force wills Padme to die because The Force wants to meet their daughter in law

It does this for basically everyone Anakin cares about

sometimes anakin and padme just drop dead, and wake up a few hours later bc they had a family dinner to get to.

"I'm going to kill you" is suddenly the literal way for Anakin to say "I love you"

Anakin dies on Mandalore and Satine witnesses it and she's horrified and doesn't know what to tell Obi-Wan but then she sees Obi-Wan talking to Anakin and she's so confused

So if anakin kills you and you’re someone he cares about you come back to life immortal.

Death By Skywalker basically being a way of becoming immortal is gonna fuck with the war so much

when Palpatine tells Anakin to kill all the jedi he thinks Palpatine is telling him to invite all the jedi to his Force Family Dinner

One day the entire Jedi temple just dies all at once, and comes back a couple hours later, to the confusion of literally everyone (including the Jedi)

yoda is frequently killed to spend time with the force because after 900 years the two of them are tight as fuck

Anakin doesn’t have attachment issues in this bc hey, people die all the time! :)

He also ends up being worshipped as a demigod.

More Angsty version of this: young anakin kills palps bc he thinks he'll resurrect, but then the tangible form of the force appears and explains that he was the sith master.

Palpatine would probably actually try to get Anakin to kill him, because hey! Free immortality! Don't mind if i do!

5. Imagine if this was something he discovered as a little kid. Anakin going off to visit Qui-Gon in the force and Obi-Wan wondering what eldritch beast he has ended up with as a padawan

"Anakin what are you doing?"

"I'm making master Qui-Gon a friendship bracelet?"

"...master qui gon?"

"yeah! i gave one to my parent yesterday and master qui-gon said he wanted one too!"

"Your parent? when exactly was this yesterday?"

anakin being a convoy for dead masters and their old padawans like Weed Dad qui gon jinn and his Struggling Son obi wan

anakin has two parents

Parent and Mom

[hrtiu]

Written for @foxiyoweek day one. The prompt is Routine: schedule, daily, familiar. Thanks to @wildhoneyprose for beta’ing!

Fox liked routine. Most people wanted at least a little bit of variety or excitement in their life, but for Fox variation meant risk, security vulnerabilities, increased patrols, that sort of thing. They were each alterations to the Coruscant Guard’s normal pattern that might, in their own special way, increase the probability of a clone trooper getting killed on his watch. And so he struggled and fought against that great beast variety, struggling each day to keep his life as boring, normal, and safe as possible.

Every day he woke up at 0500, did an hour of PT, used the refresher, debriefed with Stone on how the night shift had gone, performed a random inspection on one of the platoons, then gave out security detail assignments. The captains generally already knew what their assignment would be, but he finalized plans and announced any last minute adjustments.

Then just before lunch he’d meet with Chancellor Palpatine. He’d give a brief report, accept security requests from the senators, and receive any special instructions the Chancellor might have. The Chancellor usually only had a couple of minutes to spare for the Commander, but those few minutes represented the culmination of Fox’s work over the last twenty-four hour period. If the Chancellor was unhappy about anything the Coruscant Guard was doing, everyone would suffer.

As soon as he escaped Palpatine, Fox would scarf down a quick lunch on the run, then make it down to the Senate just before they opened session. Fox’s presence at the Senate was partly ceremonial, but he still watched diligently for threats as the senators held forth, conscious of every potential security breach or vulnerability in the system. When the session ended he stood at attention by the doors as the senators filed out, nodding if they acknowledged him but otherwise standing stock-still.

He’d eat a spare dinner of rations on his walk from the Senate back to GAR headquarters, spend a few hours filling out flimsiwork—requisitions, reports, disciplinary forms, that sort of thing—then meet with Thorn and Stone to discuss  the day's proceedings. Then he turned in for the night around 2400, just in time to catch a solid five hours of sleep.

That’s how a good day went—PT, meetings, debrief with the Chancellor, Senate, flimsiwork, more meetings, and food sometime in between. On a bad day Fox was called in for riot patrol, extra bodyguard duty, security for a big event, damage control for whatever disaster had befallen the capitol, the subduing of a massive, city-destroying monster, and so on and so forth.

For several months now, counting from after the city-destroying monster incident, Fox had had a string of good days. PT, Senate, meetings, PT, Senate, meetings, PT, Senate, meetings. Then one day his whole rhythm was thrown out of whack.

It happened in an instant, as the senators were filing out of the Senate building, and it took Fox a moment to realize what was wrong. The senators were leaving with their normal amount of gossip, backhanded compliments, and scheming, and nothing seemed amiss at first glance. He looked hard at the retreating backs of a cluster of senators down the hallway and the sight of a gold-trimmed, maroon cloak lit a spark of recognition.

“Wheeler, take over this door for me, will you?” Fox commed the captain on duty with him.

“Yes, sir.”

Wheeler jogged over from his post just inside the building and Fox made his way down the hallway after the Senator. He wasn’t technically supposed to leave the door until all the Senators were gone, but he doubted any of them would notice the difference.

“Pardon me, ma’am,” he said when he caught up to the maroon cloak. The Senator turned around, her amber eyes wide with surprise.

“Is something wrong, Commander?” Senator Chuchi asked.

“Nothing’s wrong, ma’am, just wanted a quick word.”

“Certainly.”

She followed Fox away from her colleagues and into a side passage, then gazed up expectantly into Fox’s visor. Looking down into her cornflower face, the overhead light reflecting off of her golden jewelry and golden eyes, Fox forgot for a moment what he’d asked her here for.

“...Commander? What can I do for you?”

“Oh, uh…” Fox coughed awkwardly, then took off his helmet. Chancellor Palpatine didn’t like him taking it off while on duty (and he was always on duty), but he’d noticed the senators seemed more at ease with a face they could look at when he met with them one-on-one. 

Fox tucked the helmet under his arm and cleared his throat again. “Nothing serious, ma’am. Just wanted to check in with you—see if everything’s alright.”

One of Senator Chuchi’s delicate eyebrows arched upwards and she looked at him sideways. “I’m fine, Commander. Was there something that made you think otherwise?”

Oh. Oh. He hadn’t thought about this part—the part where he had to explain himself. “Well, er, no, ma’am. You just seemed a little out of sorts.”

“Out of sorts?” she asked, even more confused than before.

Well, banthacrap. I guess I imagined it after all. “It’s nothing, ma’am,” Fox said hastily. “I just thought you seemed a little off, and-”

“How did I seem off?” Senator Chuchi asked, alarmed.

“Well, it’s nothing serious, I, uh…” 

The Senator continued to stare at him with keen, discerning eyes, and it became clear that Fox was going to have to tell the truth. He sighed, fighting the heat he knew must be rising to his cheeks.

“Every day when you leave the Senate, you smile at me. But today you didn’t, so I thought something might be wrong.”

“Oh…” Senator Chuchi said, her eyes falling to the floor and a dusting of lilac spreading across her cheekbones. “Well, um, I suppose I must admit you’re right. I was hoping to introduce a rather important bill today on behalf of the Pantoran Assembly, but I haven’t been able to find the support yet to get it passed. I’m afraid some of my allies are not yet willing to put themselves at risk for my sake.”

Oh. Well, that was nothing so disastrous then, was it? At least, from a security perspective. Still, until Senator Chuchi was back to her normal self Fox knew things wouldn’t feel quite right.

“Well, in my years serving at the Senate I know it’s rare for a senator as new as you to do as much as you already have,” he said.

Senator Chuchi’s mouth quirked upwards in a dissatisfied smile. “Perhaps. But despite my inexperience, my people still need me to perform.”

“I understand, ma’am. ...If you don’t mind my asking, is the bill in relation to the crime lord Jaum’s occupation of Andelm IV?”

“Oh! You are familiar with the conflict?” Senator Chuchi asked in surprise.

“I attend every Senate session, ma’am.”

“I see… I didn’t know if it was always you or not,” she said, biting her lip. “Your armor all looks so similar. And yes, you’re right. The bill I was hoping to pass would formally denounce Jaum’s activities in the area as well as allocate GAR resources to Andelm IV to assist in his removal.”

An expansive warmth filled Fox’s chest as he realized that Senator Chuchi would smile that earnest smile of hers at any one of his brothers, and not just the most senior clone in the GAR. “You should talk to the senator from Kashyyyk.”

“Oh?”

“I don’t know much but… I understand that Jaum and the Wookies have some bad blood. They might be willing to help you.”

Senator Chuchi brought a dusky hand to her chin, the skin between her eyebrows furrowing in thought. “Hmm… I haven’t spoken much with Senator Hakkon, but he has spoken up several times when Andelm IV has been mentioned…” She looked up, a blinding smile illuminating her face and crinkling the elegant viridescent arches on her cheeks. “That is an excellent idea, Commander Fox. I’m so glad you spoke with me.”

Fox inclined his head. “Happy to hear it, ma’am.”

She made her farewells and fairly bounded down the hallways, a renewed spring to her step and enthusiasm to her smile. Fox watched her go, leaving his helmet off longer than he should. Then he got a comm from Stone—something about patrols being shifted around for a parade—and it was back to the grind.  

He put his helmet back on and headed back to the GAR headquarters, thoughts already racing with to-do’s and schedules and the various needs of his men. It was a grind, but it was a good grind. Everything was back as it should be.

[the-rancor-battalion]

When White Sand Turns Red

Medieval AU!

“By the Maker, there’s no end to the treasonous bastards...”

Lord Havoc, Commander of the 1st Kamino Infantry Battalion of King Palpatine’s Grand Army of the Republic of Galaxa spoke gravely as he stared down at the white sanded beach below.

Said beach was absolutely covered with men in in tan uniforms and armor, all bearing the insignia and flag of the Confederacy of Independent States, a group of minor kingdoms and baronies that had broken away from the Republic of Galaxa. Today the vast armies of the CIS were landing on the famous white beaches of the Island of Kamino. The Kaminoans were a species of sorcerers that had used black magic to create an army of identical soldiers to combat the CIS at the request of King Palpatine. Or so the story went.

Lord Havoc turned to his right as another man just like him, a clone of sorts, barked out to the archers on the wall. “Fire at will!”

Lord Colt, Commander of the 2nd Kamino Infantry Battalion of King Palpatine’s Grand Army of the Republic of Galaxa turned to look at his brother. “We have to hold them here, if they break through the gates they can overwhelm us.”

Havoc nodded, taking a moment to examine his brother’s armor. Colt’s armor was a light grey color, almost white. The same as Havoc’s own. His pauldrons however, were different. His right being red, and left blue. Colt’s chest-plate was also a darker grey than Havoc’s, and his crimson shield was attached to the warrior’s back for quick access.

Taking no time to look at his own armor, Havoc turned, only to hear Colt speak. “I’ll lead the counter-charge. I need every man we can spare.”

Havoc whirled, catching Colt’s elbow. “No. I will lead the charge.”

Colt rolled his eyes. “You’ll never make it back.”

Havoc threw him a rare smirk. “I can hardly let you have all the glory now, can I?”

They both knew it was fake bravado. Especially with the sounds of catapults firing, and swords clashing in the background.

Colt looked at the ground, then sighed before clasping Havoc’s forearm tightly before letting go, letting his fellow commander prepare for the worst decision of his very short life.

—————————

Havoc tightened his shield on his arm and rolled his shoulders as he neared the gate. The portculass had been destroyed by a CIS catapult, so he had ordered two dozen men to form a permenant shield wall in lieu of the fallen fortification. He passed the bodies of fallen Kaminoans and fallen Clones as he made his way towards the gate with a procession of almost a hundred men behind him. He spied armor from a dozen and a half different battalions.

The deep grey of the 104th Wolves Battalion. They originated from the Forests of the Kingdom of Naboo.

The cerulean blue of the 501st Steel Battalion. From the Blue Mountains on the eastern coast.

The orange of the 212th Ascension Battalion, from the underground cities that made up the United City States of Utapau.

The list went on.

No matter.

He reached the shield wall, and could see the men prepare to move.

He drew his sword from its scabbard and raised it high in the air.

“Forward!”

The shields parted, and Havoc was the first of a hundred men to sprint into the sand, thanking the Maker that the Kaminoans had imbued his armor with magic to make it weigh almost nothing.

He knocked a CIS war-axe to the side with his shield and cut down its wielded with one swing of his sword. Without even stopping, he reared back from that swing and stabbed another man straight through his ribs. Another quick move forward, he slammed his shield into the face of a towering enemy swordsman, knocking him to the ground and slitting his throat with one fell swoop. He walked forward as three more came at him.

The first, he parried the axe swing and shoulder barged the warrior before stabbing him through the heart.

The second he knocked the war hammer aside with his shield and span on his heel, slitting the back of his attacker’s throat and bringing his blade back fast enough to end the third attacked with a swift disembowelment. All around him, men fought desperately to stem the tide of CIS warriors.

And they were holding.

—————————

Colt was amazed. He’d expected CIS to cut them down, but they were ac—

He was not expecting a Rancor to emerge from the water with a screaming Asajj Ventress on its back.

Rancors were beasts from the untamed jungles of Felucia. He’d faced one before. It killed half his unit.

Ventress was an evil type of war monk known as a Sith. Suppose that explains why she could tame a Rancor.

They needed help.

Colt walked down off the wall and drew his sword and shield. “4th Battalion, to me!”

—————————

“My lord, we can’t hold them back for much longer!”

Lord Blitz, Commander of the 3rd Infantry Battalion of King Palpatine’s Grand Army of the Republic of Galaxa turned from his position atop the wall to face the mere Knight in the colors of the 212th Acension Battalion who stood before him.

“Sir! I don’t know for how much longer we can-“

A chilling wind tore through the island.

“The Makers do not favor us!” The Knight cried. “We must-“

“Fallback?” Blitz snapped, pulling his helmet off to look the man in the eye. “Flee?” He asked, stepping closer. “Is that what you left your post to tell me? Is that why you left your men?”

The Knight opened his mouth, then closed it as Blitz walked closer. “We have been summoned, by the Makers, and you want to flee? I should kill you myself. You bring dishonor, to your men. You bring dishonor, to me. You bring, dishonor, to Galaxa!”

The Knight dropped to a kneel as Blitz shouted.

“I swear to you, Sir. Kamino will not fall. Not today. Today. We. Fight. Signal whatever’s left of the 41st to come about and reinforce the west flank. Pull the 91st out of the Old Quarter to do the same. I’ll find whatever’s left of the 3rd and reinforce Colt and Havoc. Go!”

“Understood!” The Knight replied as he ran off.

Blitz sighed, placing his helmet on roughly, “The frontline will hold,” and drew his sword. “even if I have to hold it myself.”