#our teacher (even tho a nice dude) straight up tell us to just make a model

[mechanichuntsman]

my brain cannot comprehend what in the actual fuck am I even doing

[shitty17]

Rating every Gordon Freeman

Half life 1 gordon

Beloved and classic. Cannot beat the original! You gotta respect your roots. The man who started it all. He’s a tough quiet little redhead with a fun little pony tail. Fascinating design choices lead him to be a regular blank slate character who you can still pick out of the mass of similar ones by his iconic goatee and glasses. The early 90s art did a good job of showing you “this isn’t a giant beast of a killer man, this is your 40 something geometry teacher in a microwave with a gun” and that set the WHOLE precedent for Gordon’s character for me. The glasses, goatee, and defined cheek lines that seemed to be in every half life model at the time age him a touch more than 27, but if you stare at him long enough you can believe it. Plus, not a lot of detail to glean from a low poly model anyhow. His expression shows him as cool, level headed, and focused. He’s so fucking ORANGE holy shit. This is our very first Gordon! The fucking sexy SNATCHED little waist and chicken neck give him extra points for being a shitty little skinny legend. The metal diaper and looking like he’s about to give me detention because I spoke too loud in class docks tho.

9/10 Beloved classic Gordon who’s flaws can easily be waved away with “it was our first try”, and yet also make him a fun original stand out character.

Half life 2 Gordon

He is no longer my pain in the ass highschool teacher, he is now my bitchy gay college TA who rolls his eyes when the professor says some dumb shit and looks WAY too much like House MD if you get too close. Props for consistencey, this really is just a dolled up version of low poly Gordon. Still got his heavy brow and aged face creases so he looks more like a 30 something dad than a 27 y/o scientist, but that can be blamed on all the stress. Hes got bigger prettier eyes now. He’s still remaining cool and focused, but he’s getting upset. He’s getting distracted. He’s had enough already. And yet, he still finds it in himself to keep going. The new HEV is a VERY sexy little upgrade, maintaining core features such as keeping that waist cinched, and supporting his skinny chicken neck. Finally got RID of that diaper and replaced it with a stylish yet flirty dragon underbelly scale set. It do kinda give the vibe that his dick out tho, which is both hilarious and also pretty ballsy, pun not intended. The colors are not so orange now, which is good! Balanced it out with a lot of grey. Makes him easier to look at, but a little easier to glaze over. Everyone from my generation will know Gordon Freeman by these images, they’re iconic. A good medium between “a regular guy” and “rough tough white mchandsome fps protagonist”. Hairs a lil more of a pretty chestnut brown and still got that nice warm red tone to it. I can’t tell if these images are so iconic that it’s seen as the norm, or if I’ve seen this guys face so much that I’m used to it by now, but he does give off “just kinda of a mediocre guy design wise”. I like that about him. Gordon Freeman just being a regular dude is huge and important to his character. He’s been upgraded to be sleeker and cooler and that’s got him serious traction amongst fans but he falls a bit more to the “generic badass” bin with this. Still, a lot to love.

8/10: Brilliant, iconic, handsome, sleek, and cool to look at, but making him easy to sell action figures of detracts from his character. An upgrade visually but has yet to convince me that he really is as cool as he looks.

Half-life: Alyx

Sweet holy mother of Jesus Christ our lord.

Like. Where do I start. Okay I’ll start with the obvious. He’s cute now. He’s super fucking cute now. He no longer looks like Walter white. He looks like a young man. He looks like a barista you would get at Starbucks who’s voice has deepened from 5 years of T and he tells you to “have a nice day :)” in the sweetest of tones and you really do have a nice day because of it. He’s got big ole peepers now. His old man wrinkles have smoothed out. He’s got noticable birthmarks and freckles. His cranium is regular sized now instead of cartoonishly massive, making his hairline look less like it’s receding.

But also? The most important part? Even when he looks angry, even when he puts back on the cool focused serious look? Even when he tries to put on his classic badass look? It’s not convincing anyone any more. We know now. We know this is just a young man in a HEV suit. He’s not indestructible, he’s scared. Look at him. He clings to these weapons because they’re the only thing stopping everything else in the world from killing him. His brows are furrowed not because he’s pissed with blind rage, but because he has to focus and think and be careful or else he will get dropped. He’s hurt. He has taken damage to his suit. He is not indestructible unstoppable badass or the idol of freedom he’s been made out to be, he’s been sold as. This is a man. This is your friend. He needs your help as much as you need his. This in particular reflects the plight of society nowadays. In 2020, we have less and less faith in our governments and ruling classes, and the only faith we have left is feeling vulnerable and asking for help. This Gordon is relatable. This Gordon shows pain. This Gordon needs his family as much as they need him. This Gordon is being pushed too far, but he still says he can take it. This Gordon is way more badass.

They fucking nailed it. They made a perfect Gordon Freeman. I straight up could look at this dude for hours. He’s so cute I need to give him a bowl of soup and a kiss.

10/10. Unreal.

Bonus!

10000/10 if you squint Lamarrs eyes can look like Gordon’s eyebrows.

[dorkylittleweirdo]

crazy shit that happened during high school

freshman year:

my favorite teacher (pe coach) ended up being a pedophile. it’s kinda scary to think about bc like,, that was my favorite teacher and i trusted him and if he tried anything with me i don’t think i would’ve stopped him and just yikes. but yeah, it was a whole thing. once the school found out they got the police involved and he fled the state. they got him in the end but i mean,, i spent a lot of time in the secretary’s office crying about it bc i really trusted that dude and i was distraught over it. that might’ve been where my trust issues started??? fun stuff

my school shut down. like i mean,, bc it was a charter school and we had to get the charter renewed. but the board at my school wasn’t using their money the way they were supposed to. it was a whole thing, like the principal left that school year bc he knew what was happening, couldn’t stop them from doing it, and didn’t want to be part of it. so they had a lot of meetings that us kids were allowed to go to so we could see what was happening and all that. i only went to one and it was A Time bc the lady who was recording everything passed tf out and of course nobody was a doctor and my pipsqueak thirteen year old ass went “i know what to do” bc i Did so i had to help her which was a trip in and of itself. but anyways, the school’s charter got denied, and everyone had to transfer, but the district promised that we could go to any school we wanted, not just the one we would have to go to by zip code

sophomore year:

i ended up going to a private christian school. big fucking mistake. absolute disaster. nothing really happened that was crazy by their standards, but it was for me

so they have a house system. think of harry potter, it’s EXACTLY like that. we have points, we have competitions, we have all that extra stuff. it was such a time, like i don’t,, i don’t even know how to explain how fucking weird that shit was

i came out in the middle of class. the principal’s daughter was our sub and she goes “okay so everyone is gonna tell us something that nobody knows about them” so when it was my turn i go “so it’s not a secret and y’all should know this but clearly y’all don’t: i’m not straight”. silence. dead silence. we could hear the class next to us it was so quiet. some girl whispers “i knew it”. another girl leans over and whispers to my friend “i’m so sorry”. principal’s daughter gives me the most threatening, condescending smile i’ve ever seen and goes “thanks for sharing”. i had to come out to my mom that same day bc i told me friends and they panicked on my behalf bc when people found out that they were gay, the principal told their parents. and i was Not about to be outed by the principal. my mom has since told me that the principal never contacted her about it so i came out for nothing but i mean i really like being out so we’re good

so instead of prom, cult school has this thing called “the ball”. sophomores, juniors, and seniors are allowed to go bc there’s less than fifty people per grade so if sophomores don’t come, there’s not enough people. so i went bc my friends were all going and i was like “yeah why not might as well”. three dance lessons. three fucking dance lessons for this stupid ball that i didn’t dance once at. i literally had three panic attacks in the span of an hour at the second one, and then i had swim practice right after. fucking exhausted. felt like i ran five marathons by the time i got home. the last lesson i didn’t do any dancing, just vibed with my friend in the corner. so at the actual ball, same friend and i vibed at the tables the whole time. we went to the bathroom for like an hour and took mirror selfies and tried to make our asses look bigger bc we’re Like That

SO AFTER THE BALL, there was apparently a massive party and there was alcohol and stuff. so my friends and i were blissfully unaware bc nobody liked us bc who tf likes the school sinners. so we walked to get ice cream after in our fucking ballgowns and suits looking like All That. so the principal thought that it was one of us who hosted the party and we were like “??? what party?”. literally almost got in trouble bc the principal thought we were LYING. i told my mom and she takes No Shit, so when the principal called her demanding to know if i went to/hosted the party, she marched her ass down to the school and was like “i know y’all have something against mexicans and people who are different from y’all, but that’s no reason to blame my daughter for something that your so called “perfect” students did”. my mom got Heated, roasted the fuck out of the principal, then LEFT. principal never fucked with my mom after that

so there was a fire like across the street from the school. the fd told us to evacuate, but noooooo the school was like “god will protect us” i’m like “okay but i’m gay and apparently your god hates that so i think we’re gonna Perish”. the fucking POWER went out and they STILL wouldn’t let us go. my mom called to sign me out so i could go wherever the fuck i wanted in the school until my friend’s dad came to pick us up bc she couldn’t get there bc of the fire. so i vibed next door to my friends’ class and i was like “heeeeey god’s trying to kill the gays” and we laughed about that until my gay ass got saved lmaoooo

okay so this is the funniest memory i have. in chemistry once, our teacher took us outside and started digging a lil hole next to the school. and keep in mind, my chem teacher used to be a hardcore atheist druggie, like fucking meth and coke and shit. took a theology course and converted. so he’s really sweet and nice but he’s also Slightly mad scientist vibes. so anyways, he puts something in this little hole, lights it on fire. i forgot why he did it, but i was standing back with him and one of the exchange students and the three of us watch in Horror as the rest of the class makes a circle around the fire and start doing some weird dance and saying something. it wasn’t like a chant, idk what to call it, but they were like counting like “and one, and two, and three, and four” and then the dance would get more intense and they’d get louder. so eventually they were screaming and going apeshit and i looked at my teacher and he’s just,, watching them do this. i’m like “and i’m satan, huh?”. like these kids really trying to summon the devil but i’m the bad one bc i like girls

junior year:

so technically this was during the summer but i’m putting it here. they have like a house party after the school year ends. i made cookies. apparently they “looked weird” so nobody ate them, two of my soon to be teachers kept insulting them. i called my mom to pick me up, took my cookies with me, got back in the car in tears. had to have a whole conversation with the principal and those two teachers so they could apologize bc i wanted to leave the school after that. dw tho, i took my cookies to the guards at my summer camp and they appreciated the hell out of them bc they were Very Good Cookies

so my ap bio teacher was an enabler. i was his favorite bc i wasn’t a religious nut and it was very obvious that i believed in science and not whatever the hell this cult was doing with their creationist bs. also he was a parasitologist and i’m super into parasitology so he had fun talking about it to someone who both understood and was extremely interested in the topic. i rolled up to class one day like “hey so i’m gonna buy hissing cockroaches from amazon, if my parents find out and don’t let me keep them do you want them??” and he’s like “yeah”. i brought them to class a few times and everyone Hated it but my teacher was like ayyyyy. and everyone thought he was either and atheist or agnostic, so when some girl asked how he thought mary conceived jesus to see what he said, he looked at me like “y’all hear somethin/hel p” and i go “parthenogenesis” and he Went With It, talking about how it was theoretically possible in humans but we ignored the fact that the baby would’ve been a girl bc the class is dumb none of them have ever heard of parthenogenesis before jesus is the true trans icon we all need

my art teacher was my favorite and she knows that i’m gay. she’s the only teacher from my school that i’m still in contact with. so every big project we did, i made it gay. and i knew, and my friends knew, and she knew, but the rest of the class had no idea. i’m like presenting my project and the class would get sus and they’re like “so are those two really good friends” and i’m like “so she has a rainbow heart on her choker and she has a lesbian symbol on her shirt”. the class was still confused and my friend yells “they’re LESBIANS”. it was iconic

my brit lit teacher was bi. she never said it, but i know she was. always talked about how much she hated men, then was like “women are very very good”. no way this woman was straight. so we read dracula and it’s got that Subtext, so one time i leaned over to my friend bc he sat next to me and i go “the Homoerotic Subtext”. and i didn’t realize that the teacher was right in front of me until she tapped my desk and goes “it gets better”, told me a page number that i flipped to, and it was Even More Gay and i was like 😏. also she assigned me a gay poet for my poetry project and i talked about that for my whole presentation in front of the class and it was the biggest paragraph in my essay and i got 100% on it even tho i choked at the beginning. also i mentioned in passing that i liked sappho and she goes “ooh i love sappho” i’m like “ma’am please leave this cult and get you a gf”

senior year:

i left the cult finally. went to the one school i actually liked. i made friends who actually like me and they were patient and they were amazing and i love them all very much even if i’ll never tell them. my classmates were great, v friendly, i had a great time. however,

so many fires. school got cancelled like five times bc of how bad the fires were

the school shooting. i don’t think i need to go further into that, it’s pretty self explanatory

covid. again, don’t need to go further into that, v self explanatory

[moist-astronaut]

things my friends and I have said over the last year

“I’m verbally illiterate” “Isn’t that called dyslexia”

“I’m going to chemistry and I’m gonna light myself on fire” “No” “Damnit let me burn like the witch I am!”

“Don’t worry it’s not anti-Christ it’s just anti-government”

“I’ve been getting migraines everyday and I’m considering chopping my head off” “But that would kill you” “Two birds one stone!!”

“I swear to god I will hug you” “My house is 5 miles away and my doors are locked” “Your locks are FEABLE”

*writing an email* “Bitch comma”

“Ok but I could be a top” *laughing* “What I totally could be!” *laughing and crying for literally 6 minutes straight*

*on a group call, friends cat misha walks into the room* “Tell misha I would live and die for her, whichever she prefers” “She says thank you” *cat noises*

*joins discord vioce chat at 11:26 pm* “You guys are gae but I love you” “Thank you saeren very cool” “Goodnight” *leaves chat at 11:28pm*

“Jake jake jake jjjake -j-jaaake hey jake” “W H A T” “Can I eat your pens” “I literally have a restraining order against you”

“I’m educatn’t”

“Me calling you to dumb to be a slytherin is payback for you leaving multiple handprint bruises on my legs” “It’s not my fault your skin is weak”

“He’s rolling so that we can walk” *rolling in the grass and collecting leaves on his jacket* “I’m rolling for your sins”

“There are 7 of us so we can each be a deadly sin” “I wanna be Ross” “You mean wrath?” “No that dude from Friends”

“Ok but other than his strict attraction to women, his multiple wives, his hatred of gay people, and the fact that he is dead, what is standing between me and Joseph Smith the All American Hottie from being happy together”

“Consider: Mullet” “No”

“I do my homework while loudly eating a pop tart asmr”

“No no listen, he’s my brother, he’s a bastard of my dynasty…I might just ransom him off”

“These Norwegian bastards indroduced a fucking PLUAGE to my COUNTRY”

“Ooooo meth”

“Half of my life is me resisting the urge to sing the zaboomafoo themesong, the other half is me actually singing the zaboomafoo themesong. So either way my entire life revolves around zaboomafoo.”

“I just don’t think I would hire a gay man-wait no I’m not homophobic”

*chucks half a gallon of milk in a gas station* “-ah- got milk?”

“Gimme your sternum boy”

“Nooooooo he stole my sternum!!!” (Side note these were two separate occasions)

*being force fed milk duds* “No!! This is the worst way to die!!”

“Hey babe come over I have a hammock and a heated blanket”

“Be afraid, be prepared- IN THE WORDS OF SCAR”

“Stress eating stress gummies Stress eating stress gummies Stress eating stress gummies stress eating-”

“I thought to myself ‘Y’know if I die today this is how I want to be remembered- a leather skirt and leg warmers’”

“I think I’m telling you to go to sleep” “You’re gonna have make me” “I can’t tell if this is cry for help or flirting” “Yes”

“This is at best cannibalism and at worst being straight”

“Oh look Percy Jackson’s here now, ooh they replaced every character’s face with Mr. Bean. I hate it”

“You can’t be mean to me! I’m gay AND a woman! That’s a hate crime!” “Yeah well I’m brown and Muslim! Square the fuck up bitch!”

“Babe it’s not very metal to be afraid of your hair dresser” “It’s not very metal to have a hair dresser and yet here we are” “It’s fine you’re into glam metal”

“Hey augie, got any grrrrrrapes?” “I’m doing IXL :(“

“Can I come?” “No” “What if I bring watermelon?” “You can come, leave the watermelon, then leave” “:(“

“What in the jersey shore”

“Rad’nt”

“Ok but consider: Mullet-hawk” “I can and will divorce you”

“Dee-vorce 👏 Just to 👏 re-vorce 👏 👏 “

“Ah yes, that’s why I’m fat…for combat reasons…”

“You fool I consent!”

“My Boston fern is being a bitch but that’s because it’s winter and that’s BITCH season”

“You walk through the rest of the house and it’s like ‘ooo witchy and aesthetic’ then they’ll get to the guest room and it’ll just be a tacky twink Fever dream”

“Who needs a scalp”

“HeHe, sexing”

“Council has decided, your vibes are rancid (and not the band)”

“You’re never to young to hate women”

“Look at me I did the dishes I’m a 1950s housewife with a strangely new jersey accent and affinity for lesbianism”

“Well look who has the table now”

"contrary to popular belief, fuck you"

"There's nothing here that requires whisking, i'm just problematic"

"If you could go anywhere in the world with two people, who would you choose?" “New Orleans!”

"So he proceeded to bite me on the butt...like, really, really hard."

“I don’t cheat, I win. It’s not cheating if it’s consensual.”

“My mouth, my choice”

“Do you like my ombré of a tan"

“Who’s the cutest in the chat right now then?” “It’s Paige!” “No, it’s obviously Augie.” (paige's boyfriend)-said by a straight man

“Francis is just a one and done.”

“Would you ever have a threesome?” “...yes...” *To Francis* “Sure!”

“How do you feel about anal sex?”

“Of the people in this room, who would you most want to make out with?” “Augie” “The answer is yes, but only if it’s 6 feet apart.”

“Square, flat, and overcooked.”

“The virus would be over if everyone would breathe underwater for 5 minutes.”

“I have daddy issues, but not with my father.”

“You’re a ladies man but you have two boyfriends.”

“That means lesbian in sign language” “No, that means fuck boy in American”

“I’m like a parasite, you can’t get rid of me. I’m here forever.”

“You’re like my long term hit man”

“Is it Jake?” “No, why would the evil Russian man be Jake?” “Because he would never hire a gay man and you don’t look like a gay man”

“Jake is homophonic, Augie is racist, and Francis is a woman hater!”

"Grew a korean radish, 1 star"

"I've got more cause i'm a rich boy, and by that i mean my father sometimes buys avocados. And that's on what? Upper middle class"

"Tell your good for nothing boyfriend to stay away from my mom"

"It's not inciting violence it's just ~inspiring it~ "

"Listen bitch just because you have avacados and a roomba doesn't make you better then me"

"i would totally let narthex ruin my life. and that's on what? daddy issues and bisexuality"

"who is titty"

"how is he racist" "he hates the french and russians right?" "don't forget italians" "that's just self loathing"

"This is the last time i wear a thong- it's for educational purposes"

"babe come over i'm a burrito"

"he put bread with milk. luckily he passed away"

"you touched my wiener!" "you offered it!"

"foot'nt"

"i took a shower and realized the floor doesn't bounce"

"i love ass whoooaaaaaa i meant cassie"

"Rosalie you're the deciding vote. Be decisive." "Dude i'm bisexual and a gemini. what're you talking about?"

"Okay so to recap: jake is homophobic, augie is racist, francis is a woman hater, and now paige is a bunny abuser?"

"Just bring a watermelon keychain and it'll be fine" "Whooaaaa i'm gonna need a big key then"

"If you were blind what would you even see"

Post Traumatic Youth, plus D for danny's disorder"

"i think she's past the phase where she likes people just because they're russian"

"francine is a lesbian, but only during quarantine"

"don't be a home wrecker!" "i can't help it!"

"we are not doing coed tents" "i wanted to go purple-ing though"

"if it's not perfect i'm gonna through hands" "with who" "i don't know, the CEO of stupid"

"don't make me feel guilty for bullying you"

"it doesn't look very cash money cool but okay"

"slinky cat" (ferret)

"The pond behind my house didn't freeze all the way through this winter, so i couldn't go ice skating" "okay, so i have an idea. we can go to walmart and get-" "ANTI FREEZE!" "well, yes- wait, no. No, the more i think about that definitely no."

"The amish will win, the amish will prevail" "the amish will conquer us all!"

"He do be kinda mafia doh"

"i'm being sneaky sneak. stairs go creaky creak. and i need. DRUGZ"

"brain on shutdown, power saving mode"

"Somebody go tip her, she's dancing like a stripper" "thatd be nice- oh wait no!"

"fellas, is it gay to lick your homies eyeball?"

"it's not racist if you're only targeting one group of people" "that literally racism" "but what if they're french"

"i'm not racist yet but the option is available, and it's good to have options"

"they don't call me Mr. Steal Yo Boy for nothing!" -a straight man who has a girlfriend

"i think he has a bad habit of not dating girls"

"kinda hot tho 🥵 in a Santa Claus kinda way...hoe hoe hoe"

"i'll be your hot jacuzzi bubble dealer"

"when deceit and doubt fills you up, you cleanse your mind through creative activities, such as making organic soap"

"friendly reminder #4: you're never to old to eat a freezie-pop"

"sorry i'm just nervous" Chinese Teacher: (Waving her hand in front of her face) “Just pretend I’m cabbage.”

"me when my dads name is publicly broadcasted on the radio for his 14 felonies and assorted war crimes"

"<@!523669420435046401> I sentence you to a solid nine by the banhammer. For your crimes against Humanity, God, Satan, and Matt Frank. See you in hell."

"Danny, just because you're playing *Just Cause* doesn't mean you need to Just Cause our friendship!"

"Silly Matt! You fell for the ole’ Heimlich maneuver!”

"i got a bunch of new shirts over quarantine" "you would"

"Ok, there's a 32 year old doctor in new Jersey dying right now" "Yeah, but to be fair everyone in new jersey has a pre-existing condition"

“This is the longest period of time we’ve had without a Nintendo direct” “Maybe they’re gonna make a Nintendo indirect?”

"you’re looking extra white today.” "thanks i've been practicing"

"do you have any batteries" *looks inside shirt* "not yet"

"let's go colonize the middle school!" "yyayayyayayay!!!" " wait I gotta ask my mom first" What happened next is know called the *Juniors burden*

"oh so you're a DOWNSTAIRS milk kinda guy"

"you are literally the human embodiment of crumbs in a bed"

"The Berk-ey Creamery isn’t a place, it’s a people!”

 "He shoved a floating joy-con straight up his flux-capacitor.” "great! now it's paired"

"No, that isnt armor, the real armor are the friends you made along the way"

"This one goes out to all my lady friends out there *proceeds to kill himself in game*

"i'm a coward" "that's what a coward would say!"

"rest is for cowards and fools"

"every time you speak you take years off my life"

"Shark dick hoo ha ha"

"Me and the boys brushing our teeth at 3 AM"

"remember if you kill yourself the fascists win"

"The Beatles aren’t real. Have you ever seen a beatle? No? Exactly." "Babe” "Shut up I’m right."

*reading over these quotes* "god i hate that" "you said that!"

[thefloresgarden]

Sad tales of a 20 something. -FRIENDS AND WEIRD WAYS TO FIND THEM-

Hello! Back again from a long ass time of taking a break from this site and my 2 followers who don’t even reblog my writings.

Anyway, the reason i’m back is because i actually show this blog to one of my bestestssss friends in the world and encourage me to keep going and well here i am.

So i was thinking, maybe since a friend of mine made me come back, I should write about that. So this is it, an Ode to my friends.

I have always been sort of a friendly character, at least in my mind i am. Even when i was a kid and used to cry a lot and be a bit on the side shy, I always had a lot of friends. I even dare to say I was one of the first girls in my fifth grade class yo have actual good guy friends, not only the “popular” kids that chased girls to see under their skirts. Actual good and close friends that I’m still friends with.

So, I went to the same school from elementary until high school, meaning that i had been with the same people for around 12 years, and damn i was tired of it, not from my friends, not from a lot of people to be honest, but maybe more with myself and my lack of abilities to make new friends.

That leads me to my new found weird way to make friends. It started in college when i started as a music engineer major before switching to media and film. Engineering not always equals to men, in this case i guess it did. Some may say having all guy friends is easier no drama and shit, and is true for some part, I’m still grateful of all the guys of my Music engineering program that adopted me and ate lunch with me every day, not to the rest of engineering students that are “nice guys” by mansplaining anything on the math class board before the teacher (female) started explaining, though not gonna lie i didn’t understand shit, i still didn’t want some greasy hair guy with a weird stain on his shirt,that i pray it was toothpaste, to explain me shit. I can fail this class on my own thank you very much.

My first girl friend in college was a girl on the bus that i knew my cousins was a friend with but never formally met her before and i chatted her ear off in the way home, i was so excited i forgot i could be a chatty bitch when i feel happy. When they left the bus (her and her roommate who is lovely too) I started to replay everything we talked about and was already very much regretting living because i was so cringey. I guess i wasn’t that bad, I got a Facebook friend request and became pretty close after that.

First friend I made in my new major program (who i made before switching because of mutual clases) was a girl that i always saw in my favorite class, “Signs, symbols and significances” she was funny, very friendly and clearly friends with at least three quarters of the class. I decided that was my next mission, i left my guy friends side after an exam in our common class and went literally running towards her and another girl (amazing person too) I asked them in the most awkward way how the exam was for them and even if they thought i was weird they didn’t show it and were so nice with me.

I made a mistake though, I told the girl i had a mission on (to be close to) she seemed familiar outside class and she said i did too but we couldn’t remember where from. Until I realized she was the girl that i met in my first day of school in math class and sat next to her. That, until i didn’t hear my name while checking the list and was told that wasn’t the math class, everyone laughed i stand up and trip and yell “puta madre” so hard everyone laughed again. I then found out that story was so funny to her she actually used it as an ice breaker when meeting new people and started introducing me as the “puta madre” to everyone. At least she got me a lot of new friends, and besides having passed more than 5 years, she still reminds me of it and she still is one of my closest friends.

Another story, I was an exchange student and knew nothing about the culture (only basics, didn’t want to be rude), the language or anyone in this new country. I was so lost I literally was trying hookup apps to meet friends (never works tho, at least on me). It was my second day in Seoul and saw there was a kpop concert of one of the three groups I actually knew and my baby brother was a fan of, i checked and there were some tickets left, bought them, put on a pretty dress and left. Going to a concert alone is not that bad, going to a concert alone in a country you have been for 5 minutes and also understand shit, that is a fucking nightmare.

I met some friendly girls from USA that helped me out to figure the shit out in the venue, they told me they were living in Korea for like 5 years and still couldn’t even read, which i thought wow kinda disrespectful but anyway i wasn’t going to let go of anyone friendly anytime soon. Met some other girls that came to the country only for the concert which wow commitment. And then I was left alone again when taking the seats (standing spots to be exact). The concert was cool even if I didn’t understand shit and I’m 87% sure I even caught eyes with some of the guys in the group a few times. The concert ended and I wish I could say I captivated one of the kpop guys and that is my next friend meeting story but, nope is not and honestly i wouldn’t change it for any of the hot men that were on stage.

Fast forward the first day of school, i was lost and ask a girl for a classroom, she was very nice and told me where it was but that the class was in like 30 more minutes. We made small talk and i sat on a bench in the opposite way of her. The girl next to her was saying she had this next class that sounded kinda familiar, and I realized it was my same class so I told her to go together. Once inside the classroom I saw her phone and she had a familiar face as her screensaver, it clicked, it was one of the guys of the concert! I asked her and she said it was him and that she went to the concert too and we decided to had lunch together. From that day on we became pretty much inseparables, until she got the sleaziest guy in the world as a boyfriend but we don’t talk about shit in my safe space so that is a story for another day. Besides that terrible guy and his best friend who dated me only to dumped me weeks later to play LOL 24/7, I got my baby, my mijita who i love so very much and again, wouldn’t change a bit.

Lastly in this post, not in life nor in place of my heart, is a little blessing (literally) that came to me from heaven! She didn’t even know this, but a semester before she was having her abroad year in my country I was in one my deepest holes in my life. My mind was empty but my eyes always filled with sad tears. That semester before, nothing major changed in routine, in my family, in my life as in general. But somehow it did in my brain, my heart was feeling agitated for no reason, my palms were sweaty and shaking all the time and my brain was as it was shut down. I got the big D, and not as in a big nice dick getting me fucked, but another type of fucked nonetheless. Depression, the kind of weird illness that can’t be seen but oh dude it can be felt, and felt is all i did, i felt sadness, loneliness even with a full house and a full line of friends ready to help me. Sometimes shit just happens.

Took a semester off and when I came back I decided to faked it until i made it, and it was going great. I did cry back at home a few times a week but i could hold it during classes or in front of people, great advance. I decided to focus in what made feel best, dressing in my favorite shit and letting everyone out of my arts and humanities department have a nice view of it. And then I see her, weird to say i still remember how cool she looked, tall as fuck, wearing all black, shaved head and what i got to find out were her trusty black vans. I got obsessed with her fashion style and decided my next mission, be friends with her, or at least for her to acknowledge my presence. I saw her talking to a close friend (another great meet cute story for another day) so i decided it was my moment, I said hi and was introduced to her, we chatted a few minutes and got along pretty well. Her amazing style and bad ass british accent made me feel i was in bad rom-com where we were both straight and platonically soulmates. I saw her again outside the bathroom while i was waiting some friends, we talked for an hour, she invited me to a party and we had dinner first (so romantic, I know) at dinner I thought it was going to be awkward until we both realized our mutual love for SZA and Idris Elba. We never stopped talking after that, she even went back to my hometown for 2 weeks with me, where all my family loved her and strangers treated her like a celebrity. She calls my parents tíos and we talk as much as we can now that she is back at her country.

I miss her everyday and there is not a minute I am not grateful i met her.

These are some of the stories of how I met some of my friends, my closest ones and those that are still with me in every step I take. I can tell you one million more ways of how i met friends i love so dearly, but that is for some other day my hands aren’t hurting for writing only with my thumbs in my phone.

And what I care and love most about all these, is that I would never want to change being the weird girl that catches a hunch and runs towards people that will mean the world for.

FRIENDS I LOVE YOU ALL. 

[therevolutionwillnot]

She Can Fly (a ranty ode to my grandma)

Grandma used to tell me when I was little, I’d take a sheet and run around the house singing, I Believe I Can Fly. I can see the movie version of myself, hair in braids, shoes off, grandma saying “Hohoooo-bapreeee.” Run to one corner “I believe I can touch the skyyy” Run to another corner “Think about it every night and dayyyy” Flying across the rooms, wings flapping “Spread my wings and fly awaaay” I run through that open door, arms flailing drastically the beat beating through my chest as it repeats until the crescendo, “I believe I can flllyyyyyy!” Fast forward and rewind a few hours backwards, Dadu is yelling at grandma. Somewhere in my head his Hindi is slapping the walls and he is the large frame of a giant who squishes my grandma into the mouse form she feels majority of the time around him. I think he slapped her at one point, but all of that is lost or fuzzy in where we don’t like to remember. This woman. This woman who raised my uncle, aunt and dad. This woman… Would say to me “Mimi do you remember the garden. You would said my garten- these are my toe-mayy-toes.” There would be a laugh in her voice, as if she could see the sun shining on my little authoritative face claiming “This is my land” in tiny toddle voice. She liked the Animal Planet Channel, America’s Funniest Home Videos (animals over humans definitely) and soap operas. All the face slapping, facial expressions, dramatic music, my grandma’s reaction. “Oh myyyyyyy.” It was the animals and videos that were the best in my book. Some baby, child thing or animal would do something irreversibly stupid, clumsy and all at the same time adorable. She would laugh. “Oh hohohohohoo oh my.” Her laughter made me laugh, I loved to watch her sit in her plastic cheap looking dollar store chair and smile. And laugh. I think those were our moments. I didn’t realize this, but she raised me. For a long time she was there and I can’t remember most of it. I don’t know those times that my cheeks must’ve ruined the tectonic equilibrium as her face would peer into mine, searching for the many ways to make those cheeks burst even more with smiles. The times we must’ve had each other best. I will not know those. We were learning about human biology, I read the passage, I got all the information-We essentially come from monkeys...or monkey-like things, my brain said. I know things, I’m twelve. What in me decided to have this conversation with my dad? What sparked this ignorance to state boldly, “Dad we come from monkeys.” Immediate downfall, the bible was talked at and thrusted into my hands. “Are you telling me your grandma comes from monkeys?” I can’t answer with a straight face, because it’s all over. The world is ending. Quietly I say, “Yes. We all do.” More fireballs thrown until our words are pure flames. My grandma is praying in the corner, I’m crying. And realized I didn’t want this. I didn’t to see her like this-don’t care about him, he’ll always be this way, but grandma. I made a day in hell for you and I’m sorry. I told her I didn’t care if he lived, one day. We were on the phone. But he was getting sick. He’s always getting sicker. She said he’s in a bad way. I propose the idea that maybe he is, and maybe we should be ready for that...and in a small voice I tell her I don’t care. She was immediately offended that I would ever say anything like that, he was your son. I know that hurt you. I never should have said that out loud to you. She reminds me of the Glass Menagerie-that fucking story always pisses me off (but you are so fragile). She would think so little of herself (you didn’t like new clothes, in fact I have some of them). I tell this story to kids I work with all the time- it’s my favorite to tell and of course I change it up a little more every time. He was outside making chicken, red, so deliciously red but it was always smokey and filled with mosquitoes. You were inside making potatoes. Sometimes you sat on the floor and chopped on this big wooden heavy chopping board with this knife that looked like a mini machete perfect for your everyday brown toddler. I asked if I could help around, you stirring, he’s flipping and drinking. You both say no. So apparently my tiny self managed to drag a sack of potatoes to the bathroom. Plop them in one by one...to which one of you noticed. The door creaks open slowly, assuming it’s just a little girl taking a large deuce (it runs in our family seriously tho), but to her surprise...her granddaughter is smushing potatoes into the toilet. I can imagine what you sounded like “Oriiiiiiii bapreee!!!!” And apparently my father walked in- this guy who loves Beevus and Butthead with the comedic level of a 15 year old boy in the 90s...yeah he laughed his ass off. Secretly struggling with the idea of how to unclog the toilet. You guys loved to tell that story and I always loved hearing it. It was during a time you were happy with him...but we both know how temporary that was. We would go on walks, I’m in middle school...I’m a teenager and you disclose to me how scared you are of him. I’ve heard him yell at you or flex in frustration. We have both seen in this in men, too many times. It’s as if Dadu just couldn’t rest and had to reincarnate himself in your son. 12 pack of beer, everytime we hung out sometimes a 20 pack. Budlight or Budweiser mostly. Every. Night. You told me he did ether one night and died. Granted he was younger...but you’d been carrying his booze problem since. It was you. Alone. With him. And when I called sometimes our secret code language of his angry presence was enough that I would get on the phone with him, make him laugh, something. Just to ease your space. But you called me one day...it had gone too far. He had alcohol poisoning and my brother was there. He had to call 911. He was crying and alone with you and him and...I wasn’t there. To help, to take over, to handle the crisis. I was so young to hear about his abuse to you. I asked my mom what if we moved you...I knew she never would. But I really wanted you gone from him. I wanted to take care of you. I wanted to know you were safe and happy. I hurt you when I didn’t call or visit. I don’t know why I didn’t, but I do, I was too lazy, I was living my life, I was like my mother. She did that to you too. I learned this from her, I take full responsibility for not seeing you, I did not see you when you were here last. I didn’t tell you the truth. Me and Al aren’t together and whe I have a kid I will most likely not be in a marriage but I’ll be happy. Because I can stop this curse of misery and pain. If I am here for anything I am here for that. You gave me love-you showed me what love looks like and that is all I can give back. We all deserve love, hurt, broken, in pieces, in full glasses of water. I’m sorry if I didn’t give it back to you. But please always know that I love you. You met Al. You said his name funny. But it was cute. I knew he wasn’t the one but I never brought a guy to meet you and you deserved to meet someone. He was my first long term relationship. I didn’t love him, but liked him a lot. I think you could tell. I think you liked watching me with a guy. You kept asking when I’d get married and start having kids. You really wanted grandkids, that’s when the very elongated “Graaanddmmaa” would creep a smile around my mouth. It was just cute that you started doing that when I was getting older. You died on the night I was out dancing on a date. It was a really nice date and I don’t know if you said this to me, but I believe you did, you told me, “You love.” And that feeling I’d always dreamed of, dancing with someone where the energy and connection are caught together to hold up the mast to swing in the storm of sound waves. There it was. That feeling. The next morning Felicia texted me. I was on the toilet. I had a great night and a great morning. I knew her text was bad. It was in my gut but I hoped...and then I read it. And I cried so hard muffling the choking sounds shoving my hands over my mouth trying to keep everything from falling apart. You were just gone...I know that’s cliche. But that was it. No will. No letter. No words left for me or anyone. You didn’t exist, you weren’t coming back. And I didn’t say anything to you, I didn’t say any of these things to you because I let him take you and our family didn’t have words for you. They held nothing in your name, no funeral or church event. I didn’t fight for you because I thought I was too small. I should’ve fought for you because no one else did. I was strong enough for you, I was strong enough to fight them off to let them know that you mattered, that you gave me strength and inspiration in this world to fight for my existence. I never told you that I wrote a paper about you for my English class in high school. A very influential teacher, this old white dude read my words about you. Just you and your superhuman ability to survive this world and still have room to smile and laugh. The hug you gave me more which was always more than three times when we would say goodbye. I loved saying goodbye to you. He left me a message, that I was a very talented writer and should follow this road, this path… I never told you, that you gave me that moment, I was proud to exist to feel purposeful in this world. I wrote about the smell of turmeric, onion, curry, garlic in your salwar, the Amla you combed through your hair and always braided. The way you said, “Ow.” and made such a painful yet comical face. The way cilantro chili pepper eggs in roti were simple and yet savory as ever like your dahl, your fried fish, anything you cooked. Your heart that gave away so much love and you only got so much in return. You gave me love and I am so thankful for all that you have been in my life, my Grandma. These are my words for you.

[ofmontys]

“ —  and if you’re just tuning in now, you’ve made it just in time for our ‘ sleep with me ’ segment. nightfall has sufficiently fueled my ego and i’m reared and ready to go, compiling a playlist curated to get one lucky, hand-picked bastard in bed with me. tonight’s submission comes from camila, age 18 2/3, from two towns over. ” rustling paper. a delighted scoff. “ tonight, as per camila’s request, i’ll be attempting to seduce vincent van gogh.  vince, this is acid ghost’s ‘ the artist’s high ’, also known as what i hope i can be for you. ”

or, alternatively :   yo yo, my dudes! the name’s linc (19/est/she&her) and you just witnessed an excerpt from bez holmes’s  radio show quite appropriately named, ‘ fuckin’ hell ! ’  that airs weekdays and sundays from 7pm to 8am! 

i am absolutely stoked out of my mind to write with all of y’all! beneath the read more you’ll find a very unapologetically messy introduction to my strange son, killian beelzebub holmes !

* TIMOTHÉE CHALAMET & CISMALE / / here we’ve got KILLIAN BEELZEBUB HOLMES , the TWENTY-ONE year old LOCAL RADIO HOST. with a reputation for being + SLY, + ANOMALOUS, - OSSIFIED, and - RECKLESS, it’s surprising we haven’t heard more about him. BEZ has been around faulk hollow for TEN YEARS, but they ain’t leaving anytime soon. you hear ME AND MICHAEL by MGMT? that means you’ll see ‘em soon. 

“road work ahead? uh, yeah, i sure hope it does!” ( alternatively: bez holmes, a roadmap. )

so bez is… kind of a nutcase. he’s just… he’s that guy in the bar who seems so desirable. voice like warmed honey, a smile that could kill – but dear lord, don’t get close to him. he’s fucked in the head. and unless you’re prepared for that, friendships/relationships with him can get... pretty darn overwhelming.

he’s a host at the local radio station, so he curates the music and talks through little segments throughout the day. well, i should say night -- because the show he’s known for occurs weekdays and sunday nights from 7pm - 8am. weird hours. weird guy. so it all clicks right into place! people tune in for the music ( a lot of indie eclectic vibes ) but also his personality. bez tends to veer off-script a lot, which both aggravates and amuses his superiors. he’s basically the only reason the tiny radio station is still alive & kickin’, so what are they gonna do to him, huh? fire him and take the whole station down with that bullshit move? not likely. so bez’ll keep doing and saying whatever the hell he wants on air, thank you very much.

can he get... a mfing... cinnamon raisin waffle???  dude’s friggin’ obsessed. don’t mess with his waffles, man. waffles don’t play.

has a knack for stumbling into stupid situations. y’know how there’s two kinds of people in this world? the kinds that act upon the universe and the kinds the universe acts upon? bez is that guy in textbook math probelms who has 42 apples for no apparent reason. he’s the dude in on top of spaghetti all covered with cheese whose poor meatball fuckin’ rolled out the door. things happen to bez holmes no matter how much he might try to convince you otherwise. his whole life is just a string of varied ( and usually nonchalant/unbothered/troublingly chill ) reactions to crazy shit.

case in point:  why did the holmes family move to faulk hollow? well. their old house had like... a freakin’ meltdown. yes, the house. it swallowed their dog. and their mom. casual... house-y things. but when people ask, bez and his father like to say they just wanted to “ see the sights ”. and apparently faulk hollow was one of those.

[ tw: death, murder mentions ]   basically, faulk hollow offered a place for them to disappear, since the disappearance of bez’s mother couldn’t exactly be explained to and/or believed by police. bez’s father is wanted for her murder. so they friggin’ skrrt skrrted out of iowa and plopped down here, under the radar. “holmes” is an adopted last name.

so bez has been here since his 11th birthday! honestly, he probably earned a reputation pretty quick for being that kid who’d, like, “hey buddy!” at all the insects on the playground.  “ do you believe in magic? ” was often his best icebreaker.

so... fun fact. he accidentally inherited his dead dentist’s vintage jukebox. yes, i know how that sounds, and it’s exactly that. but dear lord, that thing has just been infinitely fucking with him since the day it showed up on his doorstep three months ago. more about that later!

an example of a normal occurrence in bez’s life: “hey. so, uh… i know we just met, and maybe this is moving fast? but i saw this keychain in walgreens and it made me think of you. so… yeah. here. tell anyone i did anything nice for you and you’re dead to me tho.”

he seems smart. he seems so cunning, you guys. like, holy shit, he makes these deep ass statements on the air and curates music that makes people feel things. but don’t be fooled. he’ll drive wearing shades at 10pm just to look cool, all while bumping 80′s glam rock from his blue ‘67 impala. he’ll do that cliché head bop at stoplights, encourage other drivers to join in.

don’t call him killian!! killian who?? his parents gave him “beelzebub” as a middle name to be funny and fuck with his mother’s father, who was a pastor. what they didn’t bank on was four-year-old bez insisting on being called by it – you can guess how well that went over with his teachers and his peers. so to appease them, he accepted the nickname “bez” and has gone mainly by that ever since. most people probably don’t know his true first name, since he goes by “bez” on the air. but close friends and trusted individuals might occasionally call him “kill” or something to that effect.

pets are not bez’s thing. every houseplant he’s had has died. succulents wilt in his presence too, and he thinks maybe at this point, it’s a running joke among plantkind because his birth name has the worldkill in it. still, even with his track record, he has a fish named nigel. nigel dislikes affection and bez. they engage in staredowns and silent mental warfare. bez often “forgets” to feed nigel or change the water in his tank, but that fish just will not die. nigel’s probably just truckin’ on to spite him.

aggressively writes the wrong date for like… 8 months following new year’s. so he finally gets it right for the final ¼, and then the cycle begins again. additionally, cannot keep the days of the week straight. he’s started a multi-song alarm campaign in an attempt to rectify this situation. bez’ll report his findings in a week. if he remembers.

one time he got pulled over for speeding back from the radio station at 7 in the morning, and you know what he did? he freakin’ offered the cop some hard shit from his flask and some of his opened bag of funions. so the two of them got tastefully buzzed in bez’s car and talked about the kardashians for two hours. and it was through that very conversation that bez learned he’d been doing a very shit job of keeping up with them.

scared of birds. yes. those things? with the wings? terrified. how dare they occupy space above his head. how dare they swoop and swerve all around. no. his neighbor in iowa had a parakeet. maybe that bird finally went missing one day, while they were on vacation. maybe it escaped. to like, the afterlife. maybe bez helped. maybe.

he’s really bad at like … taking care of himself? funions, candy, and takeout forever.  what do you mean raisin bran crunch isn’t a wholesome, well-rounded meal? you mean you’re not supposed to pour the entire carafe of syrup on your waffles every time? someone… pls fix that.

hella prone to bullshit! like… did you know aliens are real? yeah. really. hey did you check your horoscope today? what zodiac sign are you? he’ll pretend to know what zodiac he is like: hey, uh… listen .. . if your zodiac is asparagus don’t even bother being my friend… i’m a caprisun & it’s just not gonna work out. sorry.

memorizes commercial jingles. will sing them to prove points.

“what the fuck’s a kanye” - bez holmes, 2k18

“a mug shot? i don’t even drink coffee.” ( alternatively: more pointless headcanons because apparently i think this is necessary. )

don’t be fooled by the title of this section. he drinks coffee. a lot of coffee. with a lot of sugar added to it. could probably kill a horse, tbh. he’s not sorry.

his signature half-smirk drives folks mad. he also has a collection of faithful listeners who like to call in and tell him how soothing his voice is.

lowkey writes his own music? lowkey was in a band called ashes when he was 13; it lasted about 6 seconds. lowkey has a few things recorded on his laptop? but he’ll never actually do anything with ‘em.

owns an unironic walkman! enjoys it immensely! i know!

catch him in the local 24 hour diner spending his life savings on cinnamon raisin waffles and dimes for the jukeboxes! because LMAO, he’s not using the old one at his place!!!

convinced said old, stupid, 1947 jukebox in his apartment lays host to goblins. that thing shakes and quakes at odd hours. it’ll play shitty pop music that isn’t even in the dumb catalogue. sometimes it lights up when he trips over his own feet or accidentally burns his microwave popcorn. the fuckin’ thing is possessed and it’s mocking him. so, naturally, what is there to do but appease the tiny beings inside it?? he makes biweekly sacrifices to it – mainly consisting of snack foods, candies, a casual sprinkling of his own blood. y’know. casual.

super into space? honestly would love to grab sushi with an alien sometime?

uh…  he’s convinced everyone he sleeps with kind of mysteriously dies exactly 53 hours after. maybe that was inspired by like... two isolated incidents. but you can see how this is… kind of a problem, for a guy who likes to sleep around from time to time. is he a murderer? uhm, no, not exactly – but he’s grown kind of immune to the guilt at this point. he stalks obituaries a couple days after his one-night-stands, just to check. so far, it hasn’t been a 100% consistent thing, but... he’s worried. he’ll still leave the bar with you tho. ;)

he’s trying out this whole new thing of like… not going all the way? trying to save lives? but it’s really difficult and he’s losing resolve. he also can’t exactly tell his buddies, “ stop introducing me to your hot friends; if i fuck them, they’re dead. ” that probably wouldn’t go over well. he’s got enough crazy on his plate trying to appease the damn goblins.

consistently blindsided by genuinely liking other people? so if he’s into you... he’s gonna look awestruck and baffled like 99% of the time your face is within a 1-mile radius.

he’s always running his hands through his hair, which just adds to his #indiegrungeaesthetic, if i’m honest.

“girl, you’re thicker than a bowl of oatmeal!” (alternatively: wanted plots.)

childhood neighbor / best friend.   i would love to have a person ( or several )  who knew him growing up (from age 11 on), and kind of got to bear witness to how strange he’s become? maybe even be weirdos together? i dunno, let’s talk. we

past relationships.   i imagine he’s had his fair share of flings in the past. he’s made many mistakes for sure. let’s uncover them.

close friends.   #squadgoals. but really, though. i’d love for bez to have a tightknit group of 3-4 people who he just clicks with. they wreak havoc, but it’s all in good fun.

enemies.    i would love to have an enemies plot that’s actually hilarious? like one tiny thing catapulted these two into a mutual, deep, to-the-bones kind of hatred. it’s irrational, but they’re so infuriated by one another’s presence that all they can do is think of stupid quips and glare from afar. i imagine their public interactions bring onlookers a lot of poorly stifled laughs, because it’s just like… they’re so obviously trying so hard to hate one another with absolutely zero grounds.

miscellaneous.  maybe they got his mail and returned it to his door, and it sparked the beginning of a beautiful friendship. maybe they met in the park when this person’s dog peed on bez’s shoe. maybe they’re a frequent listener to bez’s show and they bonded over that? or perhaps they both enjoy engaging in semi-friendly grocery store competitions to see who can get to the ripest apples the quickest? anything’s possible!

chris! is that a weed?!  smoke with him, my dudes!! or like, anything? my guy’s not shy about investing in “life enhancements”.

but yes come message me on here for plots or hmu for my discord! so hype!

[sarohara]

You both like Friends.

Stranger: 1

You: 2

Stranger: 3

You: 4

Stranger: 5

You: what is that

You: hahaha

You: 6

Stranger: 7

You: 8

Stranger: I don't know

Stranger: 9

You: I don't either

You: 10

Stranger: Damn u lost

Stranger: U got 2 numbers

You: No I didn't!!!

Stranger: Yeah u did!

You: ohhhhhhhh

Stranger: You just a sore loser

You: Shut up darling

Stranger: Damnnn we are moving fast honey

You: We are? No idea what you're talking about, hun

Stranger: Hmmm maybe I'm crazy suger

You: Yes you are

Stranger: Yeah probably I did say to people that I shat my pants for like a couple minutes ago

You: Hahahahahahaha

You: what did they say?

Stranger: Well nothing much most skiped and some did say great or why

You: Hahahah I mean...lmao there isn't really much to say

Stranger: True true

Stranger: Tho it would spice up the conversation

Stranger: Can't be bothered to say hi all the time

Stranger: It's boring

You: I mean, if you're on omegle it's because you're bored so it makes sense that is boring duh

Stranger: Yeah true true

Stranger: I have heard boring to many times now that it's starting to get annoying when I see the word boring

You: Yeah right? So boring!!!

Stranger: Haha I see what you did there 🥲

You: Hahahah did you?

Stranger: Yupp

Stranger: Soo where u from

You: Brazil, you?

Stranger: Sweden

You: that's pretty cool

You: and what's ur name again?

Stranger: Brazil is much cooler tho

You: I mean, not again

Stranger: My name is Eddy and you?

You: I don't think so, hun

You: Eddy, it sounds like a nickname actually

You: Like Ed

Stranger: It is actually

You: Sheeran

You: Oh yea?

Stranger: Yea

Stranger: My real name is tooo weird and hard to pronounce

You: Tell me

Stranger: Whats your name

You: Sarah!

Stranger: Nice too meet you Sarah!

Stranger: Well my real name is Erdijan

You: Nice to meet u too!

Stranger: Bet you can't pronounce it

You: Oh shoot.

You: Erdijan

Stranger: Hint the E is silent

You: That's...hard

Stranger: Yup that's why I say my name is Eddy

You: well Erdijan is a nice name tho

You: Exotic I guess?

Stranger: Thank you 😊

Stranger: Haha yeah 🤣 it is

You: Np :)

You: Hahaha I can tell!

Stranger: So Sarah how old are you

You: Take a guess, Eddy

Stranger: Hmmmm 17

You: Closeee

Stranger: 18

You: 16

Stranger: Whaaattt no wayyy

You: 17 in two months

Stranger: Same here

You: Ohh that's dope!!

Stranger: Oh wow happy early birthday

You: hahahah thank you!!!!

Stranger: My birthday is like in 4 mounts I think

You: Hmmm november?

Stranger: Close but its October

You: You mean three months hahah

Stranger: Oh shit

You: Where's your math bro

You: hahahah jk!!

Stranger: I actually don't know

Stranger: I suck at math but I still got a D

Stranger: I gotta thank my teacher who helped me cheat

You: What does a D mean tho?

You: Hahaha you had such a cool teacher huh

Stranger: It's the grade we got on here so it's like F E D C B A so on

Stranger: F is the worst and A is the best

You: Ohhh I see!!!

You: we got like 7 8 9 10

Stranger: Hahah nahhh she used to scream at me at first because I sucked at math so much

You: Numbers, not letters

Stranger: Oh wow really

Stranger: I never knew that

Stranger: I thought everyone had like F - A

You: I thought everyone had like 7-10

You: ahahahhah

Stranger: Hahah then we both are wrong

You: Yess!!

Stranger: Soo what are your hobbies Sarah

You: Dancing

You: Writing

Stranger: Oh really

You: Napping

You: Eating

Stranger: I gotta learn how to dance

You: well I can help you sometime hahaha

Stranger: Hahha maybe one day

You: Yea lmao

You: What are your hobbies?

Stranger: Breathing and just trying to stay alive at this point

You: don't tell me you're depressed

Stranger: Nah I like to work out little bit and just chill

Stranger: Nahhh

Stranger: I'm not

You: Oh! good!!

You: You like to work out???

Stranger: Yeah like going to the gym and so on

You: I've never heard anyone say that they like to work out

Stranger: Tho I have only been going to the gym now 1 month I think

You: Trying to get fit?

Stranger: Yeah well I didn't like it in the beginning until my friend forced me to work out with him

Stranger: Yupp

You: He forced you? That's how you know he's a real one

You: Hahahahaha

Stranger: My friend is always calling me when im going to sleep somehow its like he knows what I'm doing

Stranger: Hahah definitely

Stranger: Now its me that is calling him to go work out

You: Hahahah the tables have turned!

Stranger: Hahaha for sure 🤣

You: 🤣

Stranger: Dude is always saying to me if you don't come today u got to do more the next day

Stranger: He's a real one

You: Hahahahahaha I wish I had that kind of friends

Stranger: Hahaha yeah those people are the greatest

You: I bet, dude

You: 🤣

Stranger: But ngl the dude is damn jacked up

Stranger: I knew this dude for 6 years and I didn't see him for a couple months

Stranger: Dude got so big I didn't know it was him

You: Oh wow!!!

Stranger: Soo what about you do you some friends like that

You: My friends are as lazy as me

You: So...no

Stranger: Hahah well thats still good

Stranger: It's fun to be lazy as long as you guys hang out

You: We don't really..anymore

Stranger: Oh damn for real what happened

You: I mean we do, but not as much as we used to, ya know?

You: Like covid stuff, it's still kinda tough in Brazil

You: and most of them started to work so...

You: They're becoming adults haha

Stranger: Oh wow already

Stranger: Well time is changing but don't worry tho ones corona is gone I bet you will get friends and start to hang out with then

Stranger: Them

Stranger: Same here for me too cause all my friends are now changing school because we are starting college

You: Hopefully!!

You: Starting college at 16??

Stranger: Yupp

Stranger: We got a different school system

You: That's impressive

Stranger: Highschool is like 7-9 graders they are like 14 to 16 years old

Stranger: Then we got to college

You: I'll be starting at like 17

You: Ohhh got it!

You: That's so cool

You: I wish

Stranger: Yeah its cool tho it sucks my friends I got to know these 3 years are going to different schools and so on

Stranger: But im lucky tho cause I got like 5 friends

Stranger: So we will probably meet again

You: Oh yeah I feel ya

You: 5 friends, that's a lot I would say haha

Stranger: Haha are you sure about that 😅

Stranger: Well I wasn't that popular or had many friends in school so I'm glad I finally left that school

Stranger: There was annoying people there

You: I mean, that's a lot if they're like..real ones you know? It's a good amount

Stranger: True true

You: Yeah annoying people, that's life

Stranger: One of my "Friends" almoste stole my jacket from me in our first year

Stranger: Friend

You: Hahahahaha I don't blame them

Stranger: Hahaha well it's alright I forgave him

You: I mean my friends used to do that a lot but like..it wasn't really stealing you know

Stranger: When my big brother found out oh boy he was mad as hell and called that dude and terrorized him

You: omg whyyyy

Stranger: Well this dude was stealing from me

Stranger: He didn't even say nothing to ne

Stranger: Me

You: I mean..he was your friend

You: Couldn't you just ask him to give it back to you?

Stranger: Dude put my jacket in his backpack and acted like he was trying to help me find it

Stranger: Nope

You: Oh no!!1

You: He wasn't a real one

Stranger: Yup that's why I said "friend"

Stranger: I had to last out with him for 3 years straight

You: oh ya you did haha

You: Dang

Stranger: Dude was always talking about girls and so on

Stranger: Nothing else just girls

You: Did you get your jacket back tho?

Stranger: Yep

You: Oh that's annoying

You: Like only talk about girls and guys

Stranger: Funny thing is he came to my home and tried to return it tho I wasn't at home when my mom found out ufff she was screaming at him

Stranger: Dude got scared by my mom

Stranger: Yeah too anyoning

You: Dang...

You: kinda embarrassing

Stranger: Dude didn't stop we always said talk about something else

Stranger: Yeah

You: Ugh If I were you I would probably just ignore him

You: or something

You: and Eddy

Stranger: Well I did try

Stranger: Didn't work

Stranger: Yeah sarah

You: Do you have any social media?

You: Instagram..

Stranger: Yeah I got snap insta

Stranger: Yeah I do

Stranger: My insta is Dumbass_Eddy

You: Ohh Imma follow you there hold up

You: wait ahahahah

You: dumbass eddy? hahahahahah

You: that's funny

Stranger: Hahaha yeah

Stranger: Thanks

Stranger: Well I am a dumbass sometimes

You: I guess everybody

Stranger: True true

Stranger: Well Sarah add me on insta

Stranger: Because I got to go to sleep

Stranger: It's like 3am for me

You: ohh okay :) goodnight!!

Stranger: Good night Il talk to you tomorrow

You: Alright eddy :) see ya

Stranger: See yaaa

[derryhawkins]

pleaSe write headcanons for the losers club’s kids im in Love with the idea of them as parents!!!

I wrote this with everyone in the same town even tho that’s very unrealistic but oh fucking well, I’m not gonna change a fucking thing. this is more just the kids & their friendship with each other?? if you want me to do one with the Losers as parents, I will! I loved writing this out omg

also i got so invested in this, i gave them names oh my god-

ok this is definitely going to get long lmao so sorry in advance!

their kids would be as close as their parents. lets be real, they probably didn’t have a choice

but they all didn’t like each other at first-

wait ok lets get this straight: Benverly has 1 kid, a girl. she’s got red hair like Bev & blue eyes, but her personality is more like Ben’s & she’s poetic but also other kids are intimidated by her (no one knows why tho she’s just a sweet little thing? maybe it was time she punched a guy in the middle of a soccer game for another girl). her name’s Allison but everyone calls her Ally

Mike & his wife would have 3 kids. 2 boys, 1 girl who’s the middle child. oldest’s name is Mark, the girl’s name is Tiana, and the youngest’s is Ryan. They’re all super caring and make sure their friends smile at least once and they’re the closest bunch of siblings anyones ever seen? Everyone likes them too & they get popular in high school bc of that & they’re all athletic in some way.

Tiana & Ally are same age so they’re bffs instantly and Mark and Ryan by default become Ally’s friends too bc the Hanlon kids are very close. if people wanna go with the ‘original group’ stuff they would be it tbh

then comes in Stenbrough’s kids! 2 boys, Peter and Thomas. Bill & Stan adopted Peter, a Vietnamese boy, around the age of 3 & he’s very shy and anxious and not that sociable. They adopted Tom when he was 13 (Peter’s just one year younger). He’s half-black half-white, biological parents gave him up, and people would think he’s sensitive about it but…he’s not? he doesn’t mind, Stan and Bill are the best parents tbh and he gloats about it. He’s a very outgoing kid but secretly awkward

finally Reddie! they have one boy, one girl. Blake and Kelly. Blake’s the oldest by 2 years, same age as Mark & Tom, and they adopted him when he was a literal baby. growing up he acquired more of Eddie’s personality. when Blake was like …6 they adopted Kelly when she was 4, same age as Tiana & Ally. she acts more like Richie. she’s almost the exact female replica of Richie but she doesn’t have ADHD.

ok now we can back to the kids’ friendship

the 3 Hanlons and Ally were fuckin close. they became friends around ages 6-8 and stuck together ever since. they tried to get Peter to join their friend group but the shy, anti-social, kid he was never really did until loud, obnoxious and loud, but kind Blake and Kelly brought them under their slightly chaotic wings

don’t worry they were nice about it

but Peter didn’t like either of them at first

Kelly teased him a l o t but out of kindness ofc & never stopped calling him Peter Pan or Peter Parker/Spider-Man. Blake was calmer but still loud and sometimes was too idk nice (wow who knew that was a thing). Peter just thought something was up bc he’s used to kids doing mean af things to him after being extremely nice so Peter’s just like a constant state of expecting hurtful shit from both of them

they’re offended bc he tells them out right one day during the summer, around age 10 & K&B are just like… “dude it’s been 3 years wtf”

that’s when Peter finally actually considers them friends bc they explained they care a shit load about him & by the start of the next school year, Ally’s friends with them too and that just brings Tiana, Mark, and Ryan as well

2 years later Tom is in the picture & Peter is once again like “i do not trust the boy where did he come from, he’s gonna shit in my bed or soMETHING”

turns out they get along GREAT & Peter is once again “i hated you” but Tom’s like “same I thought you were a snob bc you’d never talk” “…is this how Kelly & Blake felt” “probably”

all the teachers loathed the group bc even with cute Ally, nice Tiana, shy Peter, and sweet Ryan & Mark, they were all so fucking��wild

hallway fight in high school? probably 5′1′’ Kelly Tozier-Kaspbrak not backing down when she’s in a situation to fight someone both verbally & physically ok. she & Ally are literally the 2 smallests but pack a good punch and/or kick

after school detention? regular attenders are Kelly, Tom, Mark, and Ally. Peter got it once bc someone said the n-word to Ryan and he went off. that’s the first time anyone saw shy Pete red in the face. Blake got it a couple of times for getting into fist fights after someone talked shit about his friends. Ryan got it defending Peter & for spray painting something about the government on some lockers. Tiana get’s it AT LEAST once a month bc she back talks whatever teacher gives her shit

 i’m gonna say it, Tiana and Kelly fucking date

Kelly and Ally are like Bev & Rich 2.0 as best friends ok? ok

idk about the others, if I think about it too much I’ll get even more too invested so lets just leave it at that, you guys can figure out the rest of the dating stuff

Pete has his first panic attack in freshman year of high school in front of the class but Mark, Tom, & Blake are a year above him & the girls and Ryan were still in middle school so he literally had no one & that made him panic more? poor kid :’(

he tries to hide it, as in he tries to not let the others know and lie about how the presentation went

Blake sees through his bullshit instantly, so does Tom ok they’re brothers. Mark doesn’t at first but then he’s like…what’s up with our shy boi after Peter snaps at him for the 1st time

its not until when they’re hanging out that weekend & Peter just starts crying after Kelly asks about it

cue confused and worried Kelly but Peter eventually tells what happened

cue a giant group hug and caring words and a few more tears

the boys are all protective of the girls + Ryan bc they’re the youngest. even Ryan’s protective of the girls too & vice versa. the girls & Ryan are also super protective of the older boys

they just don’t want anything happening to one another bc they’re group is like…a target for bullies. 3 of them are black, one’s Vietnamese, one’s mixed, a few are Not Straight At All

the bullying stops tho somewhat when the Hanlons get recognized for their athletic abilities & when Blake and Tom are deemed as the two hottest guys in school & when Ally is said to be the sweet but slightly scary girl with her cheerleader bff Kelly who you cannot piss off ever or else you’re screwed (& Ally’s secret gf Tiana who’s good af at soccer). Peter’s the cute nerd everyone giggles about – that just makes Kelly call him Peter Parker/Spider-Man more

i need to end this soon & go to bed omg

….but no..

random but they’ve all kissed at one point

whether it be bc of dares or they started dating or hook ups (when they’re of age ofc) or what, they’ve all kissed

they all deny it but everyone sobbed when Mark, Tom, and Blake left for college

and when Peter went the next year

and then the girls

and then small Ryan, ‘The Baby’/’Baby’ ended up being his nickname for them all over the years & he loathes it (but loves it bc..yeah he’s the baby)

their parents call them the losers 2.0 bc they’re all so fucking close

Stan totally got onto Richie & Eddie bc their kids taught Stenbrough’s kids curse words

Ally already knew & taught Mark, Tiana, and Ryan & that ensued with Mike going over to Benverly where Ben just smiles sheepishly and Bev doesn’t really care lmao

Bill & Richie help with any prank the kids wanna do

i wanna write more but I can’t let this get out of hand so

a giant thank you for requesting this!!!!

peace, hope ya liked it 

ONE MORE THING: (holiday bonus) Tom & Peter grow up Jewish bc of Stan so the others do their best to learn about Jewish culture & Hanukkah & other things like that so they can participate in their friends’ traditions & not be confused when either boy starts talking about it

ok now i’m done (sorry for any spelling mistakes or something)

[racealle]

Til We Meet Again

It was my special day... with my special someone... my friends and family are all here... smiling happilly for me...     I've been dreaming of this day... walking down the aisle...  a bouquet of flowers in my hand... looking at the man waitng for me in the altar...   He was my best friend... She was my best friend... He was my savior... She was my partner...   Its the song I made just from him... singing it right now feels surreal..   I asked her to sing... Hoping it to be the first but not the last.. -------- Time Check : 2:02pm My head perk up with the sound of the door opening hoping to see the person i was supposed to meet.  We were supposed to meet at 1:00pm, today is Saturday, its not even traffic... Where the hell is he?    *looks at the reader* Oh Hi! I was waiting for someone, which happens to be late AGAIN. *reader: ahem who are you??* Ooppss sorry I kinda forgot to introduce myself :) Hi! *waves* my name is Catherine, 23 years old. Occupation: freelance model, instrumentalist, singer, and teacher :) Yip! that's me :) No Boyfriend SInce Birth... I'm still young and... boys kinda makes my head hurts, like this one im waiting rignt now.. so in the relationship aspect.. i think im good. :) thanks but no thanks.  hmm but you know what, I've been inlove like seriously inlove.. its the same man from fifteen years ago... the same boy who became my savior.... "Kitty!" a man's voice can be heard in the entire cafe.  Oh man! how embarassing! It's him, the guy I am talking about. Meet Steven, my prankster of a friend, a lunatic but my most trusted friend. :)   It quite funny to remember how we met 15 years ago...   Flashback *15 years ago* I was in my 3rd grade in Elementary, I used to be a chubby little girl, the same reason why most of my classmates often picked me to be bullied. One day, I was happily muching on my big candy while walking down the streets to school. I heard someone calling my name.   "kitty kitty little kitty hahahaha!  I looked back and saw my bullies. Way to go aiming to have a very nice day.    "What do you want Mark? I asked them grumpily.  "Give us you food, you pig!" They shouted at me. "I dont want to, Its mine. Why don't you tell your parents to prepare something for you?" *Smirking* "You don't want too? Hold her guys, let's get her lunch box! "No! Please stop! I shouted back, but to  no avail, they're still trying to get my lunch then I started crying.  "STOP what you're doing! Mr. Officer arrest them! The kids ran as fast as they could while i was left crying on my own. I didn't notice the person standing in front of me. "Stop crying now, here take this its smaller than the one you had earlier but its delicious, its actually my favorite"   I looked up at the person speaking, there I saw a boy smiling while peeling of a candy.  He hand it over to me and said "Here try this, its really good." When he noticed me staring at the candy in my hand, he nudge me and said. "Eat up!"  "Thank you." I started tasting the candy he gave me. "Hmm.. its good indeed." I said to him.  "See?! I told you so.. my name is Steven, starting today, we're friends, okay?" Don't worry those kids wont bother you anymore, I will protect you, promise!  "Okay! We're friends! Thank you once again! Starting that day, I found myself a friend, my most precious friend. :)     Present Day That's how we started our friendship and until now, we're still together.  "Kitty!"  "Speaking of the devil, here comes the trouble maker." "Kitty Friend!" He shouted again. "Argh! Do you enjoy shouting my name that much? Now the entire cafe knows my name." I said playfully.  *dear readers, meet my friend and long time lovelife (he doesn't know thay btw) Steven Salazar.*  "I missed you Kitty my friend!" he said while hugging me tightly.  ("Damn this man, dont be like that man, I've been trying to hold myself back from kissing you moron!"  silently grumbling myself.) "kitty, do you have a fever, your face kind red. What happened, I can hear your heartbeat and its really fast."  ("Really damn this guy, does he want me dead? Arghh and you my dear heart, you want to come out of my chest? arghh!!! Calm down!") "I'm fine, Im just startled because of you, you moron! We've seen each other last week, You called me as if we haven't each other in ages. hahaha" (He finally broke the hug and went to sit in front of me. He's still smiling widely while doing that flower pose, he's cheeks becoming more evident, he's looking so cute. I think I falling too hard again. Dont be like that.) (I stopped myself from writing and carefully removed my eyeglasses *clears my throat*)  "What happened to you? You seemed so happy. Did you win in the lottery?" Yah! share with me your prize! You let me wait here for an hour, I deserve a share of your winning!" (As if he didn't heard me, he's still smiling like an idiot he is.) *hitting him at the back of his neck* "Uy! You look like a a creep! What's with you? Are you in heaven?" "Ouch! That hurts Cath! and Yes, I'm in heaven and I've seen an angel."  "Wow, you're crazy." I went back to what I am doing. "Catherine" (I was surprised when he called me by my full name, he rarely use my fullname unless he will tell me something important. I put aside my files and looked at him properly this time) "Why?"  "I want you to meet someone." "If its another guys you want to set me up with, No thanks. You know what will I say." I said while rolling my eyes at him. "Idiot!, When will you have a boyfriend then? Anyway, Its not a guy. Its an angel. My angel."  "Angel? Who..."  (I wasn't able to finish what I am about to say when i notice a woman approached our table) "My dear friend, Kitty Cat, meet my Lisa, my GIRLFRIEND. Lisa this is Catherine, my BEST FRIEND." ------------------------------- (I was left speechless... Girlfriend, he said GIRLFRIEND) *waves in front of my face* "Hey dude, are you alright?" "Oh, girlfriend? Wow you had a girlfriend? I didn't know and i thought we're bestfriends?" (I told him jokingly but damn my heart feels like it dying.) "Yes, buddy, we've been together for quite long already but we need to keep it a secret because of her family, but now we're telling everyone about us. and I want you to be the first one to know." He said while still smiling happily holding his girlfriend beside him." "It's nice to finally meet you Cath, Steven has been telling me a lot of stories about you." (I looked at the girl while smiling, I hope they wouldn't notice how I truly feel. You're strong Cath, You can do this" "Its nice to meet you, Lisa. You're really beautiful. What kind of stories does this idiot told you? Come and sit with us." (I smiled and reached her for a hug. She was really beautiful and kind, I'm glad my idiot of a friend found her. It's nice to see them smiling at eacch other lovingly, but why do i feel like this? Damn, my aches while looking at them. tsk I've been cursing in my head too many times today.) (I reminded myslef of my role in this situation. I am the guy's bestfriend. I need to be happy for them. Forget your pain. I am nothing but the GUY"S BESTFRIEND.) (The couple informed both of their families of their relationship, they we're really surprised :) some of Steven's family said that they thought the two of us would be together because we were always together since 3rd grade. They didn't know tho how i feel tho...) --------------------------------- A month had passed, I'm stil the guy's best friend. but unlike before, now we rarely get to meet often. Well in my defense, I've been really busy, an offer from a Fashion Company sent me a letter for the France fashion event. I was reluctant to accept the offer at first, but after sometime, i realized maybe God is giving me this blessing to help me as well to forget and move on. Its a 1 year contract, maybe by the time I came back I already have a boyfriend to introduce to my family. Just maybe. :) That's why I've been really busy too.  I purposely didn't inform my family and my friends, specially Steven about my plans. I flew to France without informing everybody.  ______________________________________ Welcome to France!!! When I landed I called my family of what happened to not worry them so much. They were very mad at first. But i explained to them my purpose and supported me. During the 1st month, Steven and I were constantly updating each other through chats. He even told me, "Why did you have to leave like that? I didn't even have the chance to say goodbye. You're cruel, you know that? When you get back i want to have my presents. got that Kitty?"  But then after sometime, we lost contact with each other, I've been busy maybe he is too. After our rehearsals, I always go straight to my laptop to see if he sent me a message but nothing. Instead of message, what i saw in my TL are photos of hin and Lisa, they look so happy. I didn't notice how my eyes are filled with tears, tears rolling down on my cheeks while looking at those beutiful photos of Lisa and Steven.  It continued for the rest of my stay in France. I just glad that we are busy with the Fashion Shows. When I got home, I continued torturing myself, browsing my TL then I saw this qoute. "I'd rather live the consequences of the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done." It was like a wake up call for me. I'd rather suffer on my own than destroying my friends' relationship. I don't want to be selfish and beside they are happy. He is happy. I don't want himt o loose his happiness. That night, I cried myself to sleep, I didn't notice the creaking of my door. I felt a weight on my bed and someone hugging me. It was my friend Rose. I cried harder this time.  "Cath, its better to tell him, he might be with someone right now but atleast it will help to be free from what you are feeling. If you don't you might end up regretting not figthing for your love. We'll be in the Philippines by next week, grab the chance and confess your feelings to him. If he won't accept you so be it, atleast you let out what you truly feel." That night longer sobs and tears were my answer...  --------------------------------------------------------- Philippine Airport... *rings* "Mom, We just landed here in Ph, don't bother fethcing me anymore, Papa might be tired already, I just go home on my own. and its already late. Don't wait for me okay?" (When I arrived in front of our house, I stopped for a while and look at the surroundings, its still the same, my home.) I quitely opened the house, lol i still found the spare key under the rag, better tell Papa to hide it somewhere else.  "WELCOME HOME CATH!"  I was startled by their loud cheers, i thought everyone is asleep already. but here they are, my family, my friends and the most precious person in my live right now... STEVEN. I was enveloped in a tight hug by my family. Then someone took me in his arms and hugged my tightly.   "I missed you a lot, my best friend? how have you been?  (I allowed myself to melt in his hug, this will be the last time i promised to my self,) "I'm fine Steven, France has been good to me for the past year, I missed you too" I replied and hug him even tighter. "How is Lisa by the way?"  (There i saw the glint in his eyes again, the same time i heard my heart shuttering into million pieces once again. He smiled widely) "Let's meet tomorrow, same time, same place. I will tell you something important."  "Oh Sure, I need to tell you something too. See you tommorow then?" "Yes, my friend, you need to rest now. its a long flight. We'll see each other tommorrow okay?"  (He hugged me again my kissed my forehead." "Goodnight." (Yeah tommorrow, I'll tell you...  I LOVE YOU.)       ------------------------