#oughhh why am i struggling this bad

[junkartie]

Me 24/7 knowing there are things in my life making me unhappy but not knowing if giving these things up will eventually give me back my joy or just make me suffer even more

[ghosts-and-blue-sweaters]

5, 12, 13, 21, 28, 42, and 46! :D <3

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? 

Indeed I do! I’ve had her ever since I was five :) She’s pretty worn down now, but still very special. I honestly struggle to fall asleep when I don’t have her in the bed with me!

Who are five (or more) people you want to hug right now? 

In no particular order:

my dear friend Pinestripe :) I want to hug you and close my eyes and bask in the happiness of being with you okay

Ghostbur!! It actually pains me that I will never be able to hug him. Like. Pains me. I want to hug him so freaking bad

a good irl friend <3 I haven’t seen him in months and I miss him badly

another good irl friend! I’ve known her the longest out of my friendgroup and I just. want to hug her again :’)

yet another friend! Online this time! It’d be so exciting to meet her in-person & hug her tightly oughhh

Fears? 

Two words: automatic toilets. They are DISTURBING. I have been deathly frightened of those things ever since I was six years old, and the fear really hasn’t lessened over time. I cannot explain this fear because it really doesn’t make any sense ajsgajgsjsgsjsg but I Do Not like them and I am Quite afraid of them.

How was your day today? 

Pretty good! I ate so many muffins at church :) And I had chicken nuggets for dinner yay!! I also drove for a bit and that was (surprisingly!) nice :0 Before that, I finished watching a Dream SMP stream that included Ghostbur, and it was so… 😭 Gahhhhhhh ordinarily Ghostbur is so sweet & caring & kind, but in this stream he was honestly pretty selfish :( It was sad to watch!!

But also really interesting! Ghostbur is a very sweet character, but he’s also… human. He still messes up a whole bunch and hurts peoples feelings. It’s super interesting to see all the complexities of his character, even if he isn’t acting in a very honorable way :’0

How are you, really?

Not bad, but… tired. I feel like I’ve been tired for months and I really don’t know why :/ I wish I could feel energized again.

But I have been writing more! Writers block seems to be fading away, and I’m very grateful. I’ve also decided that I want to track down & watch every single Ghostbur stream, which has been quite fun >:D It’s something I look forward to doing!

OH OH episodes of season two of The Wingfeather Saga are releasing every Friday :D That’s fun!

Mentally, I definitely haven’t been in a bad place, but I also haven’t really been in a super good place? Kinda neutral. Not exactly fun, but y’know. Could be worse.

I’m looking forward to seeing all my irl friends soon :) I seriously haven’t seen them in months and I miss them. They’re gonna stop by my house in a few weeks!

Tag 5 of your favorite blogs

:0 :D

@thatfriendlyanon

@rozugold

@ghostbur-archive

@sunflower-chai

@kanerallels

(I know I’m not mutuals with all of you guys, so let me know if you would like me to not tag you here! I just wanted to let y’all know that your blogs are lovely <3)

What do you need when you’re sad? 

Depends on what I’m sad about!

If I’m sad over a fandom/media thing, then I need to be able to sit with my sadness alone. Being able to work through my thoughts by myself is really helpful, and I honestly enjoy it whenever it happens!

If I’m sad over real life stuff, I need to talk to people. Mostly I need to know that I’m not alone—that other people have experienced what I’ve experienced, that I’m human, etc. I tend to self-isolate whenever I’m depressed/anxious, so hearing someone tell me that they can relate to my struggles is really really important.