#otherwise I couldn't make out (heh) too much of the rest of the conversation-

[babacontainsmultitudes]

It's important to me that you guys know that the other day I was on the metro and this woman was talking with someone about how she and a lady friend of hers used to do literally this (er the first half I mean) they would practice kissing with each other and it continued even when they both got boyfriends I need you to know this.

📓 :3

Hi Lex :3

Hm, there's an itty bitty little Grant/Sparrow one I think about now and again in which Grant (I don't know quite how old he'd be here but it's definitely before he meets Marco) expresses to Sparrow that he's kind of afraid of being a bad kisser? Like he's worried about getting the chance to kiss someone and screwing it up lol. So Sparrow our beloved lovewolf is like ":3 Oh! Wanna practice with me then?" (Sparrow strikes me as the type of person who would enjoy kissing his friends without there necessarily being a romantic element to it) and Grant is like "😳 UM. A-ARE YOU SURE?" and well, you can fill in the rest lol.

[Send me a 📓 and I'll tell you the plot of a fanfic I haven't written but daydream about!]

[twothpaste]

fic snippet featuring lucas & porky & the profound disillusionment of realizing you're never gonna get through to a motherfucker 😔

It laid, back then, a hundred n' fifty some-odd feet from the shoreline. No walkways of wood nor metal carved the path. If an audience with the king was what you sought, you'd have to rough it to his throne. Through the soggy stench of rotting cardboard. Drenched facades melting, squelching, and pooling at your heels. Traverse his skyscraper's serpentine spine. Either atop its precarious columns, or beneath its ribcage archways. Today, the big stupid spikes with which he'd adorned the sides've since been weathered away to moundish stumps. In 2 ADD, though? They'd formed a sharklike jaw line in the treacherous muck. Dentition to rival the Dragon's own.

She soared high. Black streak on a gray blanket. Wouldda blotted out the sun with her wings, if it'd been up there to begin with. Even back then, New Pork's desolation had a notorious propensity for overcast weather. Lucas had to wonder whether that was her doing, too.

Lord of the Rings wouldn't make it into his repertoire for a long while. Leder's library had yet to scavenge any copies. The Hobbit, however, was a White Ship stowaway. The old judge kept it in a secret stash, with the rest of the survivors' forsaken tomes. Lucas'd been the first to read it, once the locks were finally broken. He couldn't help but think of it. Here of all places. Stony imagery of a lost mountain kingdom. A darker dragon, hoarding ill-gotten gains. How small he felt. How bitterly humble. To traverse these halls.

The Absolutely Safe Capsule didn't sit atop a gilded pile. Just purple-gray rubble. N' acid rain puddles. N' concrete.

A broad, hungry, window-bound smile greeted him. Upon his arrival.

Lucas didn't humor it with any of his usual salutations. Not even a glance. Just trudged right past the pane, and seated himself upon a closely-nestled boulder. He remembers his chewed nails clawing against the harsh, clammy surface.

"Y'know, Lucas," Porky purred. With no particular forward. Whether the king thought his visitor's silence haughty, amusing - or perhaps even infuriating - he didn't bother to say so. "I've been thinking," he simply announced. Craning his miserable neck, right up to the glass, as if tryin' to catch whatever delightful pout or scowl might grace the hero's dumb, pimply face.

"I bet," said Lucas. Flat as a burnt flapjack. That made Porky grin, too.

"It's sort of funny. Hilarious, even. That your so-called new society's here, to salvage my city."

This came about as outta left field to Lucas as it probably does to you. Which is to say, hardly. Weren't never really conversations, to be had with Porky. Whatever happened to be on his mind, he'd barf it right onto your sneakers. Then glance at you, expectantly, almost innocently. Like he was awfully eager to watch you clean it up.

"My city," he repeated. With a cough. "Which, as you know, I modeled oh-so-painstakingly after our old world."

Lucas turned those slatey eyes of his toward the Capsule. But held his tongue. Again - you can call it patience.

"It's almost as if nothing starts from the ground up. You're always recycling something rotten. Always on the shoulders of man-eating giants. Even if you try to pretend otherwise."

"Yep," Lucas contended. Gray as the rock he perched on. "That's the idea. We're learnin' from the past. Y'couldda stood to do the same."

Porky's prison emitted a raucous cackle. If Lucas were still looking, he'd've seen a curled lip. A snarling smirk.

"Oh. I learned plenty, my friend."

To sigh would be to appease him. Spoiling a bad dog.

"I don't really get why you won't apologize," Lucas mused, instead. "Why y'won't even fake it. There's folks who'd fall for it."

(He prob'ly would've. He thought. Up until three days prior. He'd decline to add that, though. Let Porky guess it for himself.)

"Heh. What can I say? I'm an honest guy. Much more honest than you cheating, stealing, hypocritical hicks give me credit for. Besides -- Agh..! Haahhck…!"

Porky's bone-popping shrug was cut short by a trademark wheezing fit. Lucas waited. Nails grating.

"Ah.. Hagh… Besides.. Little ol' Porky Minch's got nothing to apologize for, anyways. All I've done is reveal the cold, hard truth. Taught you sorry lot a thing'r two 'bout human nature." His royal highness dipped into a mockery of the peasants' lowly drawl. Before extending one hand, to count his points on his wretched fingers. "Uncertainty, control, anger. Frailty. Self-destruction. That's always been the long n' short of it. N' always will be."

"Agree to disagree," Lucas maintained. His low, crackly, teenaged timbre shifting an inch closer to a growling grumble. Porky ate it up. When you've been stuck in an oversized baseball for two years, you tend to develop a ravenous craving for the smallest of crumbs.

"Fine by me. Your descendants'll realize I was right all along. Even if you're too proud to accept it."

"My mom always used to say somethin' 'bout pots n' kettles."

"Ha. So, you admit you're the kettle."

"I'm more of a skillet, I reckon."

"Well, ain't that goddamn charmin'? My mom bashed me over the head with one of those, once. I ever tell ya that story?"

"Y'didn't. M'sorry to hear that."

A snort.

"No you're not."

In lieu of an answer, Lucas could only stare. Impasse was a recent addition to his vocabulary. He'd read it in one of Leder's books. He traced its edges, in his mind's eye. Chewed it, silently, between his tongue and teeth.

[zeta-in-de-walls]

Back in my Zeta appreciation hours lol. You'll probably be one of the only dsmp (analysis) blogs I'll follow because of how positive you try to be, and I have so much respect for you. I sometimes have the urge to post negative or discourse rambles, but I stop when I realize how shitty it just makes me feel afterwards. So props to you for remaining so positive even when the fandom is on fire hah.

Anyways, I love when Tommy turns off his persona (though don't get me wrong I love streamer mode too) and just talks. For all the screeching he does, he has a nice and calming voice. Podcast type beat shit. I was surprised when he was open about his anxiety and getting therapy. He's generally not a too open or "honest" person about this kind of stuff, at least as far as I can tell (somewhat also why I'm not his real name is Tom or Thomas but I digress).

Also, in general, I think it's nice thing to see content creators being open about their mental struggles and how they deal with that. I think so far, Wilbur, Techno to an extent, Dream, and now Tommy have been open about their mental health (I'm not aware of the rest but if they have, props to them too). I couldn't imagine openly telling hundreds of thousands of people on live that I have some mental issues that I'm dealing with, so I love when they're open about it, especially as a person with really bad anxiety and ADHD and depression and probably some other stuff. (Though it sucks when the fandom also latches on to this and either babies them or uses it as hate fuel. This fandom has a weird track record with mental health and 'holy shit what the fuck' takes to certain plots, cough cough exile arc why is there so much victim blaming and abuse apologism??)

So in the midst of all this, weirdly enough maybe, just coming on and sending asks to you is somewhat calming for me. I could just post this but I think this "one-sided" conversation is fun. This past week has been a shit storm for this fandom and yet we're still here. Gotta find the light in the dark I guess. (Side-note: you're never obligated to post these, as is the general consensus with asks, I just like rambling and speaking positively of you lmao.) Hope you stay well!

Hey, feel free to chat in my askbox anytime. I enjoy the interactions as well! Thanks!

Discourse can seem fun at the time. When drama's happening, people become intensely curious and want to know what's going on even if it doesn't involve them. Then once they've caught up on it, they want to give their own input and perspective on things. It's natural!

But it's ultimately draining. Each individual comment on the situation is small, reasonable. The intentions are good. But sheer quantity is overwhelming. There are misunderstandings and miscommunications and genuine negativity mixed in even if they're not the vast majority at all.

You're handing a glass of water to a man who's beginning to drown. You're reaching out a hand to give but only push them further down.

(Sorry that's based on a song lyric xD, and I couldn't not share it.)

Anyway, the fandom is fun and I do love it! I've read so many great posts, seen so much cool art, read some fun fanfiction, shared some thoughts and received nice interactions. The people trending negativity one day are the same people who trend positivity another day. It's all the same community and we should appreciate that, flaws and all. We're not perfect. We're not better and its pride to think otherwise. And its always been this way - people talk about last year Mcyt like it was better but honestly the drama was always there, it was just smaller, but we only remember the good bits.

Heh all that aside yeah, Tommy's a really cool person. I admire him trying to be open and genuine. He wouldn't talk about it and feel so stressed out if he didn't care. He seems to care a lot about being a responsible person and nurturing a good community while feeling like he's not ready to be a good role model as he's still learning and making mistakes and he's struggling to deal with that pressure. It's very cool that he shared all those concerns. I really enjoyed that stream!

Plus the fact that he's got an awareness of his own limits. He admitted that he's had therapy almost casually, recommending it as a good, useful thing to do which is honestly great. Therapy is rather stigmatised and it's not necessarily something you'd expect from someone who seems so confident. I remember there was some worry about if they'd show Tommy's character going to therapy in the Dream SMP whether he'd actually depict it well and do it justice. But now we know he's had firsthand experience and recommends it. (Obviously that doesn't mean they'd definitely portray it well but is so encouraging to know that Tommy at least takes it very seriously.)

Aah this turned into quite the ramble. xD Cheers again for the ask!