#or what an electrical shock charged directly to the brain will cause to a person

[kachawo]

I need help to save a life, if anyone reads this you guys don't happen to know if there's a blog here for writers that has information you wouldn't normally want to search online in fear of being listed on the "potential serial killer" list? Asking for a friend

[brokenjardaantech]

absorbance of the deep (chapter 4: that’s him?)

written for a mermay prompts challenge. my prompt is ‘monochromatic.’

previous chapter can be found here.

also on ao3

---

The next few hours passed in a confusing blur. When he came to, he was lying on one of the few foldable lounge chairs in the students’ support office. The lights had been turned down but he could still see clearly. There was no one in his direct line of sight, however he could hear the scratch of pen against paper and the low hum of electricity grinding in his ear, so he tried to sit up, not realising how sore his neck was until he attempted to move it and was punished with the greatest pain he had ever felt apart from that time when he had been ripped away from the ocean for a whole week because his father had insisted bringing them inland for a hiking trip. He hissed and lay back down because he didn’t want to aggravate the injury, and a hand snaked itself behind his head to guide him before he could identify who it was.

‘You shouldn’t be moving,’ it was North. ‘Do you remember what happened?’

She handed him a small dictionary. He would’ve preferred a full one under any other circumstances, the weight of the volume grounding him alongside the abundance of words available to him, but with how weak his entire body seemed to be, he was glad that his friend took that into consideration. Either that or she didn’t bother to find a big one, whichever came first. He didn’t have the capacity to care. What he did care about as he flipped the pages to construct his sentence, however, was the absurdity and danger of what he just experienced. [did - they - seriously - try - to - hang - me]

North inhaled deeply. ‘They did,’ she averted her gaze. ‘They’re still discussing the next course of action, I think. Josh is with them. So is your brother.’

The mention of his twin sent him back to the argument he experienced last night. Scrambling at the dictionary without breaking the pages, he asked, [what - did - he - do]

‘What we should’ve expected from an overprotective sibling,’ North shrugged. ‘Do you want to rest more, or do you want to talk to the teachers now?’

[what - for]

‘They tried to kill you, Simon!’ there was a tremble in the girl’s voice. Her eyes glistened in the low light of the office. ‘Do you have any idea how much trouble those bastards got themselves into? Police are involved! You have every right to press charges against them!’

[and - my - brother - question]

‘Oh for fuck’s sake -’

‘North…’

Both of them were so distracted that neither noticed Josh coming in. Simon didn’t quite jump, no, but for a split moment he felt like his heart had burst from shock, and he decided at that exact moment that he shouldn’t have woken up that early. He did not have the strength to deal with two near-death scenarios within a single day. 

‘How are you feeling?’ Josh asked as he inhaled and folded his arms in front of his chest. The gesture made him look even taller, and Simon wondered if it was a new habit developed from talking to adults. 

[tired]

North sighed and tore her gaze from the dictionary just to turn to Josh. ‘How’s it going?’ 

Since he didn’t need them to hear the conversation anyway, Simon closed his eyes so that there wasn’t as much information pouring into his brain, and his friends’ voices became clearer. Almost as clear as when Markus directly spoke in his mind, but he knew that nothing would surpass it. Then he frowned at Josh’s statement.

‘They don’t want anything to do with the students involved. Expulsion is the minimum.’

‘“Minimum?”’

‘Simon?’

He raised his hand and tapped his finger against his ear to indicate that he was listening.

‘The police are involved. Hope you don’t mind that I talked to them on your behalf because they probably don’t know your tells and how you talk anyway and… they said you are well within your rights to press charges against them. Take them to court, let the legal system decide how they should be punished and rehabilitated. It’ll take money and time but… if it makes you feel safer, we’ll help.’

It took more effort than Simon expected to open his eyes so that he could answer his friend. [what - if - i - do - not]

North muttered a ‘typical’ under her breath. Simon caught Josh glaring at her but he didn’t care about what happened next, because Josh was talking again. ‘At the least, they’ll be gone from here and, quite possibly, this village. Not forever for now because we’re still students, but for most of the year, you won’t even be able to see them. If their parents decide to induce more drastic measures… they won’t be our concern.’

‘Yeah, and when they come back for breaks?’ North’s voice was sharp enough to hurt his eardrums but he was too tired to throw the dictionary at her to tell her. ‘Who’s preventing them from getting back at us? At Simon? Who’s making sure that Daniel won’t end up in the same school as them?’

‘Restraining orders exist.’

‘It isn’t -’

Simon lost track of the conversation as soon as he smelt the sea and the earth, a unique mixture that only meant one thing: Markus was here. He then realised that he did not, in fact, lose track of the conversation, more like both his friends had stopped talking as well as a breeze entered the otherwise stale office and seemingly cooled down their wrath and worries, and it was the only thing he could hear and feel for a few long seconds before a familiar hand was holding his on top of the thin blanket covering him from his chest down and a pair of lips was pressing softly on his own. They won’t bother you anymore, Simon wasn’t sure if Markus was talking to him or it was just his imagination, but it didn’t matter to him because Markus was here with him and therefore he must make things better. I made sure of that.

Tell that to my friends.

He made himself comfortable on the lounge chair as the warm weight on top of him disappeared. The hand remained, though, and he was glad that Markus maintained some sort of physical contact; he was already missing the ocean’s attention.

‘Let me guess,’ North said after quite a while, ‘you’re the person Simon always waxed poetic about, aren’t you? Well, he was talking about the sea but he made it sound like it’s a person. Never thought there’s an actual person there though.’

‘North!’ Josh scolded.

‘This is Josh. Don’t mind him.’

‘Excuse me -’

‘How did you even get into the ventilation? I’ve climbed into some of them before and they aren’t big enough for a guy like you.’

Are they always like this? Markus asked through their bond. 

Sometimes. They’re stressed.

Watch this.

Simon opened his eyes just in time to see Markus dissolve into a puddle of water. Then, against all laws of physics, it slid across the floor leaving no trails whatsoever and climbed up Simon’s lounge chair, spreading out behind Simon without staining his clothes or the chair itself and then suddenly puffing up back into a warm, familiar shape. He didn’t deny that it felt good sitting in the space between Markus’ legs, and it only got better when Markus wrapped an arm around his waist and another around his shoulder to pull him close, possessive and protective as usual. Only at that moment did Simon realise that Markus was shirtless. At the display, North threw her hands up and stormed out, and Josh watched her disappear before turning towards the two other boys in the office. ‘You can go now, actually. Back home, I mean,’ he said to Simon, and then to Markus. ‘I would ask you to escort the two of us but… I don’t think a stranger will escape their notice. We aren’t in a brawl anymore.’

A brawl? Did you fight as well, Josh? Simon wanted to ask, but his own bed at home or the soft sand of his cave sounded much better than the lounge chair he was occupying, so with Markus’ help, he managed to stand up and was transferred to Josh’s side before Markus literally dissolved in front of him and vanished into a cloud of steam. His questions could wait.

‘Was he always like this?’ his friend asked as they slowly but surely walked outside. The sunset was bright and stung his eyes which meant he must have slept for quite a long time considering that he was attacked in the morning, which also meant that he didn’t eat lunch, which meant he probably should eat when he got home, but he didn’t exactly feel hungry so maybe that could wait. He tried to shrug because Josh hadn’t specified what ‘this’ meant, but since one of his arms was swung across his friend’s shoulders and he was still disoriented from being thrust to the harsh brightness of the dusk, all it did was nearly causing him to lose his balance and faceplant on the pavement. Luckily Josh was there to hold him, and they stumbled through a nearly-empty campus until they hit the front gate of the school where North was waiting for them leaning against a car with their bags in her arms, the vehicle a big boxy thing that looked like it could carry a big family with no problem. Just one more city thing that North - or at least, North’s family - possessed.

‘Do I even want to know?’ Josh asked as he stopped by the gate. 

‘You,’ she transferred all the bags onto one arm and pointed at Simon, ‘are not walking all the way back to that lighthouse and you,’ the finger was now directed at Josh, ‘are coming with us. I’m driving.’

‘Since when did you learn how to drive?’

‘I didn’t skip classes for fun.’

Josh turned towards Simon. ‘It’s up to you.’

He indicated the car wearily with his chin without any hesitation. He had never seen North drive before and therefore had no idea how skilful she was, but he was so tired and ready to go home that the prospect of just having to… sit there while others bring him home was more attractive than he had ever thought it would be. Car sickness might be a problem, though, because he rarely had to be on a moving vehicle, but Josh was already fastening his seatbelt for him when he came to, so it wasn’t like he could change his mind anymore. North climbed into the front seat and ignited the engine, the rumble reminding him of the argument that would no doubt take place at home, and suddenly he didn’t want to go back at all. There was another place he would much rather be. Blinking his heavy eyelids open, he flipped open his dictionary and told his friends, [do - not - take - me - home]

Josh might have frowned. Simon wasn’t sure. ‘Simon, I don’t think -’

‘Whatever you say,’ he couldn’t decipher the look North gave him before she turned around and placed her hands on the wheel. ‘Want me to take you to the beach?’

Markus?

I’ll be there.

He nodded, and that was the last thing he knew before the car accelerated and he was lulled into a shallow sleep.

o0o0o

When Simon came to, he discovered that he had been laid sideways on the back seat and was covered by a scratchy blanket. Disgusted by the texture, he swatted the thing away from his body and threw it to the front seat to get it away from his body as far as possible without outright abandoning it onto the ground, and then realised that the car doors on both sides were open to let in the soft, cool breeze of the ocean. North seemed to have parked the car on the beach directly, because on one side was a few metres of sand before it gave way to the road, and the other side was also sand, except he could also see the ocean lapping the shore. There were two chairs blocking his way, but when he leant forward to see if they were nailed into the ground or just placed there, North and Josh shifted their seats to give him the space to get out of the car. He carefully stepped out with both hands on the canvas chairs on each side and somehow managed to land on the sand without tripping on the big steps between the ground and the car’s floor. At this side of the beach, he couldn’t see the setting sun because it was in the wrong direction; it also meant that he wasn’t assaulted by the bright light, which he was grateful for after today’s incident. Losing control was the last thing he needed.

He took a few steps towards the sea before remembering Markus’ promise, and when he turned around, he saw Markus lounging with his legs crossed in yet another folding chair next to Josh further away from the car’s door, his upper body now (regretfully) covered by a black tank top, sipping a blue energy drink from a bottle dripping wet with condensation. Then he noticed that all of his friends (and one more than friend) were barefoot, so he took off his shoes and socks as well, glad that the constraints were gone and he could sink his toes into the soft sand. 

‘Want some soup?’ North asked with a tilt of her head. ‘I’ve got some in the trunk. Canned, of course, and room temperature, but we’ve got water and a stove as well.’

In the distance was the lighthouse he called home, and in the dim light of the dusk, he could faintly make out the light spilling out of the windows but not the people living there. His twin brother hadn’t come to find him yet and it was long past the time where people would remain at school - regardless if they had gone into trouble that day - so he must be at home because there was nowhere to go, the meagre and dwindling number of shops in the village having been closed for the night. Josh had said something about how it was getting more and more expensive to operate a store with less and less revenue due to people leaving the village for big cities, but Simon hadn’t exactly been listening, and the fact that he remembered this much surprised him. So he nodded, stole Josh’s chair when he and North stood up to retrieve something from the back of the car, clumsily scooted both his body and the chair closer to Markus so that he could lay his head on his shoulder and force his leg across one of Markus’ so that he could half-sit on his lap. With Markus’ arm around his shoulders, it was surprisingly comfortable. The sea wordlessly held the bottle in front of Simon in an invitation to take a sip himself, but he declined, recalling the overwhelming sweetness of the energy drink and the sleepless night he had had after Daniel had persuaded him to try half a can, and Markus downed the last of the blue drink in a few seconds, the movements of his throat as mesmerising as it was distracting. Sweet, was Markus’ comment after he tossed the bottle to the backseat of the car. It’s not something we have in the ocean, but I don’t dislike it.

You won’t be able to sleep tonight, Simon warned.

I don’t need it.

North and Josh re-emerged from the back of the car with the things they needed for an impromptu dinner, and the latter only spared them a look before shaking his head and squatting a few metres in front of the car so that they had enough space to set up the stove and keep the food they would cook near themselves. Four large cans of ready-to-eat soup of different flavours - just enough for four teenagers’ dinner. 

‘Which one do you want?’ Josh asked as he unpacked the utensils while North started setting up the stove. ‘And you too, uh -’

Markus cleared his throat. ‘Markus,’ he said slowly as if he wasn’t used to speaking. Then, as if finally realising that he could say his own name, he repeated, this time standing up, ‘My name is Markus.’

They tried to stay out of North and Josh’s way as they read the labels on the cans, , but they stopped once they realised that the other two were actually working around them and therefore needed no accommodations. The four soups were BBQ pork, broccoli cheese with potatoes, spicy beef, and chicken and corn. He could go for the broccoli or corn, but since he wanted Markus to have a choice, he turned his attention towards him. Which one would you like?

Markus picked up the can of spicy beef soup. I have little reference on what they taste like, but I would like to try this one. It looks… promising.

Only if you like spicy food. Does it have spicy food where you live?

We have everything.

Simon therefore tapped the top of the broccoli cheese to indicate his preference, knowing that he was the only one among them who actually liked the vegetable, and while he scrambled to return to his chair before his legs fell asleep from squatting, Markus stuck close to the two humans, helping them retrieve a pot of water from the sea before watching North start the fire and Josh open the can of broccoli cheese potato and placing the can into the pot so that they could heat the soup up. Then it was North, Josh, and Simon’s turn to watch in equal measures of horror and fascination as the can of soup nearly toppled over from the boiling water just to be held in place by Markus with his bare hands. 

He didn’t even flinch from the heat.

‘Well that’s handy,’ North commented at last. ‘It isn’t hurting you or anything, is it?’

A shake of his head.

‘Then help me hold it, will you? I’ll stir the soup so that it heats up evenly.’

Markus’ grip on the can was steady as North did exactly as she said she would with a metal spoon with a plastic handle, and not long afterwards the soup was simmering and letting out a steady column of steam. Taking the can out of the pot, Markus placed it in the middle of the towel Josh was holding before the latter wrapped the fabric around it and secured the towel on the can with a rubber band as insulation, and then he handed it to Simon together with the spoon. ‘You first,’ he said. ‘You deserve it after today.’

Simon accepted the canned soup with a nod of thanks but couldn’t bring himself to eat it. With Markus now helping North and Josh heat up the rest of the soup at the same time, he was left alone to his own device, and suddenly the task of bringing the spoon to his mouth seemed too daunting right now, the warmth seeping into his cold palms through the towel not encouraging him to let go by one bit. He watched as Markus dipped both his hands into the boiling water to keep all three cans steady while North and Josh stirred the soup, kept the ones in the pot safe with one hand while taking out the BBQ pork for North, then the chicken and corn for Josh, and at last, the spicy beef for himself. They all picked their seat afterwards: Josh in the chair originally occupied by North, North between Josh and Simon on the step of the car, Markus back to his seat by Simon’s side. There must be something on Simon’s face, because when they turned around and took a look at him, expressions that he had learnt to associate with worry appeared on their faces, and Markus draped his arm around his shoulders once more, kissing his temple lightly and not pulling back. What’s wrong?

The desire to eat was suddenly back, and he raised a spoonful of soup to his mouth and gave it a few blows before putting it into his mouth. Guess I just don’t want to eat alone.

Although it didn’t feel entirely like the truth, he could think of no alternative to what he was feeling and therefore decided to push it aside for now, and for the next few minutes they ate quietly, the air filled with nothing but the clank (but never scrape) of metal spoons against the cans, the wet squelch of the ingredients when they dug their spoon into the soup, and the low but tolerable buzz of the lamp after North brought it out for more light because the sun had finally set. They drank from the same two-litre bottle of store-bought water so that there was a minimal amount of clutter.

Simon was barely through one-fourth of his soup when North was already finished with hers and she dug around the back of the car once more to retrieve a rubbish bag and tossing her can inside, but he was warier of her expression than anything else. He clutched his soup tighter.

‘So…’ North raised an eyebrow, ‘when did you meet?’

Simon shoved a scoop of soup into his mouth so that he didn’t have to respond. And to be fair, he didn’t know how to answer her question either; was she asking about the first time they made contact, which was way back before she even met him, or was it the first time he met Markus in his physical form, which was a few years back, on the day she gave him his first pair of noise-cancelling headphones? He hated unspecific questions because he usually couldn’t. Luckily Markus answered for him.

‘If you’re talking about our souls,’ it was the slow, steady tone again, one that Simon discovered that he could listen to all day and fall asleep to, ‘we have been intertwined since before the beginning; if you’re talking about our minds, it will be more than a decade ago when Simon -’ he gave Simon’s shoulder a squeeze - ‘offered me his first gift.’ He stared at Josh. ‘You were there, remember?’

Josh licked his spoon. Then his eyes widened. ‘That voice was you? You nearly drowned me!’

Markus’ smile was sheepish. ‘I… apologise,’ he placed his soup in the space between his legs and scratched the spot behind his ear. ‘My control on my powers wasn’t as good back then. I was… excited… to greet my other half.’

My other half, these three words echoed in Simon’s mind as he slowly finished the cooling soup, and he snuggled closer to Markus for warmth when the night chill started to pick up. Knowing that they were made for each other was one thing, but hearing him admit it in front of Simon’s best friends… he felt fuzzy despite the day he had had. Are they still interrogating you? he asked through their connection after he finally finished his soup.

They are very curious indeed, so yes, but right now their focus seems to be shifting towards our relationship. North seems to believe that we are married in ‘underwater’ terms even though I told her multiple times that it does not exist, and Josh only seems embarrassed and just wants to leave.

Simon looked at the water bottle laid with its cap hazardously close to the sand, then the stove which fire had been extinguished some time ago, then finally at the cold, empty can he was still holding with both hands and realised that the warmth was from Markus’ hand placed on top of his, and the weight of the day suddenly dropped on top of him, threatening to suffocate him, to drown him. Maybe we should.

Alright. 

They packed up, Josh taking care of the stove, North making sure that they got all the rubbish in the rubbish bag, Simon folding up the cutlery in a towel and fastening it with a rubber band before handing it to North, and Markus folding up the chairs and loading them to the back of the car together with the lamp. And for a moment the four of them stood there unsure what to do next, and Josh realised the problem they had.

‘Are you going home?’ he asked. ‘I mean, we’re probably a few hundred metres away from your house, but it’s nighttime and I don’t think we have a torch to spare.’

Simon thought of the argument that was no doubt going on, of a tense atmosphere that only served to make him feel more trapped in his own home, of big changes and decisions being made without him. He shouldn’t go back, not when his family would only drag him down. 

He shook his head.

‘So you’re going with Markus?’ it was North’s turn to ask.

He tilted his head upwards so that he could gaze at Markus’ face. Please?

Markus kisses his forehead. Of course.

Simon nodded at North, and she climbed into the car after giving his arm a pat that could mean anything from goodbye to good luck. Josh gave him a hug. ‘You know where I live if you need to find me,’ he said. Then he entered the car as well, but it wasn’t until it disappeared into the distance inland that Markus led him into the ocean, into the cave he carved out just for him, laying him on soft, warm sand and holding him from behind while he succumbed to the weight of the day in a dreamless slumber.

Everything else could wait.

[burned-to-the-void]

Siegemas Day 17

My prompt: “Everyone shut up and pretend to be happy.”

A pre-Christmas team dinner for GIGN, basically. Or, a tiny step in the process of being accepted.

2.4K words, G rated, no content warnings apply.

Thank you again @dualrainbow​ for giving me the opportunity to participate!!💙 I hope you guys enjoy my contribution to this wonderful event, and please go check their blog to read more from other talented writers if you haven’t yet, you won’t regret! 

🎄 Happy Holidays, everyone ;)

~*~

Twitch leans forward with her hands on the counter, inspecting the food for the umpteenth time despite the fact she knows that everything is up to her standard, which can be considered a synonym for perfection. She has pestered Rook, who volunteered to help her preparing the food, enough times to ensure that. The pâté lorrain smells wonderful, just as her grandma’s used to do, and the roasted turkey, stuffed with plump chestnuts, looks almost heaven-sent with its skin crispy and glistening with rich fat. The desserts are already set on the plates―except for the chocolate mousse that’s still being chilled in the fridge―dazzling in their various colors and shapes.

Really, there is no reason to feel this nervous, it’s just another dinner with her teammates, not a cooking competition. No one is going to point out even if there is something that’s less than perfect, not even Lion would be that blunt.

He's really coming, isn't he. Reminded of the real reason behind her worry, Twitch has to suppress the urge to bury her face in her palms and groan, a bit over-dramatic as she's prone to be.

Inviting him didn’t seem like a bad idea, in the beginning. It’s not Lion himself that she'd like to avoid, it’s the inevitable tension that charges the air like static electricity when him and Doc are in each other’s vicinity, one that she can't help but pick up like a overly sensitive radar, putting her on edge as well. When Doc isn’t involved she has a nice working relationship with Lion, although they rarely interact in more personal settings, making today an unlikely exception.

It was Montagne who suggested that she should invite one more person to the team dinner, which she had meticulously planned out so they can celebrate together before they part ways to spend the actual Christmas with their respective families. Sensing her hesitation, he assured her that he'd have a talk with both of them in advance and personally see to it that they remain civil during the dinner, and this earnest promise from the most reliable man she’s ever known had been enough to persuade her.

Had been, that is, until some assholes decided to celebrate their holiday by threatening the local community with a thrilling promise of random bomb attacks, causing mass panic in the area, and along with several other operators Montagne was picked out to go and intervene. He tried to apologize before he leave, to which Twitch only shook her head because it wasn't his fault terrorists didn't give a shit about other people's holiday plans. But now that the drama of the evening is about to unfold, without him to defuse the situation if the things get heated, she can’t help but lament his absence a little.

“It’s going to be okay,” says Rook, bumping his shoulder with hers lightly, and places a tray of newly baked plum jam cookies on the counter. His eyes linger on them a bit too longingly, and Twitch sighs.

“I envy your optimism. You can have one now if you want, we’re one man short anyway.”

“Well, if you say so,” he grins, and reaches directly for the one that's practically oozing with ruby-red jam, as if he was just waiting for the cue. Twitch is opening her mouth to comment on it but that is the exact moment when the doorbell starts to ring, so she just rolls her eyes and hurries past him to greet the guest.

Doc is standing by the door, the tips of his ears reddened by the cold air but otherwise immaculate from head to toe, with a toned down blue scarf that actually matches the color of his coat, a feat not many men can achieve. Once again Twitch is reminded that without the near perpetual look of bone-deep tiredness he makes a strikingly handsome figure, even to eyes that are uninterested by principle.

Also, surprisingly, he isn't alone.

"We're not too late, are we?" To his credit, Doc's smile doesn't even look that much strained, despite his company.

"You two came together?" Twitch has to ask, blinking up at the hunched form of Lion who is tailing behind Doc, and for the lack of better word, sulking. Doc shakes his head with a chuckle.

"God, no. I just caught him fidgeting in front of the door."

"I didn't fidget," Lion mutters a protest, clearly still fidgeting. Doc, his smile somehow both sympathetic and smug, doesn't bother a reply but Lion glares at him as if he's heard one anyway. Twitch hastily beckons them inside to break the tension before it has a chance to develop.

Doc gives Twitch a quick hug on his way in, careful not to press her against the cold surface of his coat, and brushes past her into the dining room. When it's Lion's turn they both stare at each other, unsure, until he shoves a bottle of wine into her hand, almost as an afterthought.

"Thought I'd bring a gift," Lion explains with a sheepish expression.

"Thanks," Twitch arches her eyebrow, caught by surprise, albeit a pleasant one. Lion nods, looking satisfied, and follows Doc before she can find any more words to add.

"Mmm, something smells wonderful in here," Doc comments, taking his gloves off and rubbing his cold hands together.

"Hey, guys," Rook sticks his head out from the kitchen, oblivious to the fact he's got some cookie crumbs on the corner of his mouth. "And no, everything smells wonderful in here, we really put a lot of effort into it this year. Especially the desserts."

"I can tell," Doc deadpans, but not without a hint of indulgent smile, and rolls up the sleeves of his shirt to help them with the last of the preparation. He's no stranger to her kitchen, after all. Lion hovering near the counter, on the other hand, definitely is, so Twitch ushers him to the table and points down at one of the chairs.

"Sit," she orders, which he follows without any complaint.

"He's only playing nice because it's you, you know," Doc grumbles to her, when they're left alone in the kitchen by chance. Twitch only snorts.

"So, it's a bad thing that he respects me enough to listen to me?"

"Well… no," he admits reluctantly, adding sauce over the plate of oven-baked trout fillet with a skilled flick of his wrist. Twitch steals a glance at the table, where Rook is trying to make a small talk with Lion, although it's impossible to tell about what, and more importantly how smoothly, from where she's standing. Lion is drumming his fingers against the table, feigning collected boredom, while his whole posture screams tension. Not used to saying yes to personal invitations, her brain provides. When he did, he must have had no idea that Montagne, his social bridge when it comes to team dynamic, would be missing from the scene.

"Try to give him a chance, Gus. Just for tonight."

Doc's fingers falter, in the middle of putting up the garnish, but only for a split second. When he answers his voice comes out soft and pensive.

“For tonight,” he agrees, and Twitch lets herself hope that maybe, just maybe this evening won't end as poorly as she had imagined.

~*~

In retrospect, hope rarely does anyone a favor.

With the help of warm, quality food and a few glasses of wine, Lion slowly loosens up, looking less out of place, his answers not so clipped anymore. He participates in the conversation without being pressed to, although his smiles are still rare and fleeting, and as the host Twitch could have counted it as a victory, was it not for the way―

"Your claim here is outrageous, Kateb," Lion blurts out, cutting her off from her thoughts, and at this point, she neither knows nor gives a fuck what their current argument is about, or who started it this time. No point in keeping the score when they're so determined to make it a tie.

"I have statistics to back me up, and I might have shared them with you if you weren't such a stubborn asshole," Doc replies, his enunciation precise, but Twitch knows it's just because he's putting extra effort not to slur. Lion growls, unfailingly rising to the bait.

"Statistics can be flawed, more so when they're taken from the field. Too many variables."

"Actually, they're from the lab. Admit you’re wrong, it really is more fatal than a heart attack. The survival rate is almost―"

Across the table, Rook shares a pained look with Twitch. This semi-drunk, almost childish bickering has been going for god-knows-how-long over several different subjects now, changing the topic only serving as a temporary solution, and while it's better than the full-scale war they usually wage against each other, it's still giving her a migraine. She drinks what's left in her glass nonstop and sets it down with more force than she has to. It's not like they would notice anyway. Her phone buzzes from her pocket, signalling an incoming call. Twitch fishes it out in a heartbeat, eager for anything to distract her from this.

"It's Gilles," she announces, which goes largely unheard amidst the raging debate. Calmly, she takes a deep breath and slams her fist on the table, hard, making all of the plates and glasses shudder and clatter in their places. Instantly three sets of eyes fly up to her, stunned, but finally no one is using their mouth for purposes other than gaping. Good.

“I said, it's Gilles on the phone, and I’m gonna pick up now, so everyone shut up and pretend to be happy.” Just before tapping on the receive button, she adds a belated please, which does nothing to soften the blow.

Lion is the first to recover from the shock, and he gets up from his seat to exit the dining room altogether, huffing out loud. Twitch directs her gaze toward Doc, who is adamantly not meeting her eyes, his face flushed with mild embarrassment. Rook, of all people, is the only one who looks vaguely apologetic.

"Gilles!" She answers, aiming for the bright tone and probably failing, and puts him on speaker. "Glad you called, I was planning to check up on you. The mission went pretty smooth, I heard?"

"Oh, better than smooth. Turned out they were just a bunch of amateurs. The bombs wouldn't have even detonated properly, Monika said. The actual hard part was dealing with the panicked citizens, wanting to know if the packages they've just got can be timebombs in gift wrappers."

Twitch hums sympathetically, the mental image of people swarming up to IQ demanding she should take a look at their present boxes with her detecting device―that may even contain questionable items, only that they’re not bombs―vivid in her head.  Doc and Rook scoot closer to add their own hellos, and Montagne is quick to notice the absence.

“I take it Olivier couldn’t make it?” he asks, and at his troubled tone Rook jumps in hurriedly to correct him.

“No, he's here. He just went to kitchen to fetch, uh, something.”

“He is?” Montagne sounds surprised, but also genuinely pleased, probably seeing the fact he didn't bail out as a personal progress, and would be terribly disappointed to find out he is still, to some degree, trying to. Twitch feels she has no choice but to jump into the lion’s den herself.

“Yeah, I’ll go and see what’s taking him so long,” she mutters and picks herself up from her seat to follow him outside.

She's ready to drag him in by force if needed, nevermind the solid thirty kilograms he has on her, but she hasn’t expected him to be actually heading back in, and almost bumps into him in the doorway. Lion takes a step back, quick apology on his lips.

“Gilles wants to talk with you,” Twitch informs him, but it comes out as an accusation. Lion, having no problem recognizing it, just nods along.

"I just needed to get some fresh air, before I go back to pretending I'm enjoying this... new-found peace treaty with our doctor," he smiles darkly, earning himself an incredulous stare.

“You call that peace?”

“Compared to what we normally do? Yes. We’re talking and not hating each other’s guts for once,” he shrugs, as Twitch steps aside to let him in.

“Whatever you say, but keep it down a notch. I’m positive my ears are bleeding by now.”

He does have a point though, so Twitch is willing to let the conversation slip as it is, but the way he casts his glance down and frowns suggests he has more to say, so she chooses to wait, despite the chilly air.

“I want to… thank you, for inviting me. I know I’m not the most welcomed person in house parties.”

Considering the context, his following smile could be more bitter, but it remains neutral. Not really self-deprecating, just stating what he’s accepted as a fact. The attitude suits him, Twitch thinks. Sharp and precise assessment delivered in the bluntest way possible, applied even to himself.

“No problem. The more the merrier, isn’t it? And cooking for one more isn’t that much of inconvenience,” she replies, and smiles as a thought crosses her mind. “You’re not that bad, as a guest. See, you're the only one with who brought gift today."

Lion makes an noncommittal noise at that, looking skeptical, and yes, maybe that only means he is still a guest in this house, when rest of them is a family, but it's a starting point, one that now Twitch is determined to make the most of it. And the thing about acquired family is, they all started from ground zero.

“Let’s go back in, poor Gilles must be thinking either we lied to him, or that you ran away. And in case you’re considering it, you’re not going anywhere before you try the desserts.”

"I wouldn't dare," Lion chuckles, and opens the door to the dining room. After a short break, the air feels pleasantly warm, overflowing with the rich smell of butter, chocolate, and cinnamon. It seems like Rook has begun to set out all the desserts, ever the enthusiast, while Doc has been keeping Montagne's company. Twitch momentarily forgets to announce their return, in favor of soaking in every detail of the scene, from the way the soft, golden light makes everyone's face glow in the same hue, to the sound of their shared laughter, feeling so fiercely right in place―and hopes one day, if not today, it would be the same for Lion as well.

[doctorfiction]

Is it possible for a character with a pacemaker to still suffer from a heart attack (or experience any potentially lethal heart disease which causes similar symptoms?) Thank you so much!

There are some very neat things you can do with and to characters with a pacemaker. Let’s start with a VERY brief description of cardiac electrophysiology followed by what a pacemaker is, how it works, and the different types. We will finish with what they can and can’t do (the essence of your question,) and some suggestions for using them in a story. We will deal only with implanted pacemakers and skip the fancy ones used in the emergency department and cardiac labs.

Doctor Fiction’s Pacemaker Primer (simplified but conceptually accurate)

Knowing and using the terms in BOLD as appropriate will add credibility to your story.

Take a breath. The oxygen goes to your lungs where thousands of teeny air sacs lie next to even teenier vessels that take the oxygen (O2) and give up carbon dioxide (CO2). Relax and exhale, you just got rid of the CO2 and you’re ready to suck in another load of O2.

The O2 rich blood makes its way through the circulatory system to the to the Left Ventricle (the major pumping chamber of the heart) where it is pumped through the arteries to all parts of the body (brain, digestive organs, kidneys, muscles, skin, etc.)—everywhere that O2 is used. The equally teeny veins of those organs accept the O2 and give up their waste CO2. This system of veins returns the CO2-laden blood to the heart’s Right Ventricle where it is pumped over to the lungs to repeat the cycle. The average resting heart beats about 70 times a minute and the average respiratory rate is about 16 times per minute. A well-conditioned person may have a resting heart rate in the 50s.

The heart is a unique blend of muscle and nerve. The heart has an intrinsic pacemaker (node) which fires a minute electrical charge about 70 times per minute. Each charge results in a heartbeat (contraction.) If the firing rate is too slow (Bradycardia), it may not meet the body’s demands.

Potential symptoms of Bradycardia: (less than 50/min)

           Near Syncope (dizziness, vision closing in from sides, ringing in ears,          weak legs, confusion, nausea)

           Syncope (a brief period of loss of consciousness, fainting and fall)

           Angina (heart pain due to inadequate O2 caused by PARTIAL blockage   or overwork)

If the underlying heart disease is serious enough, the heart may quiver in an unorganized fashion (Fibrillation) that does not result in pumping blood. When blood-flow stops, breathing stops, and brain damage begins. If the complete lack of blood flow lasts more than several minutes, the damage will be irreversible. Damage is also happening to the heart and the rest of the body but those systems have a much greater potential for recovery.

An implanted pacemaker is a small device with a lithium battery which is implanted under the skin and wired into the heart. They augment or in some cases replace the heart’s natural pacemaker. The batteries will generally last 5 years or longer. The device is implanted near the left shoulder in a pouch created just below the left clavicle (collarbone)

For our purposes we’ll limit our discussion to two types of devices: those that pace only and those that pace and defibrillate (ACIDs)

Asynchronous pacemakers fire at a preset rate regardless of what the heart’s intrinsic pacemaker is doing, generally 60-70 times per minute. These were the original pacemakers and are rarely used now.

Synchronous or Demand pacemakers are able to sense the heart rate and fire only when the rate falls below a predetermined number, say 50.

Automated implanted cardioverter defibrillators (ACIDs) are able to sense and attempt to correct bothTachycardia (rapid heart rate) and Fibrillation.  ACIDs generally are also pacemakers.

Ventricular Tachycardia occurs when an ailing heart beats 120-300 times a minute. This can cause many of the same symptoms listed above (as well as chest pain and a fluttering feeling in the chest,) places a great strain on the heart, and frequently leads to the rapidly fatal Ventricular Fibrillation mentioned above.

The ACIDs correct Tachycardia by giving a short series of minute electric shocks timed to interrupt the abnormal rhythm encouraging the heart to return to regular rhythm. In Ventricular Fibrillation, the ACID delivers a larger shock which momentarily stops the heart and allows the natural or implanted pacemaker to resume normal rhythm.

A heart attack (Myocardial Infarction, MI) is generally caused by a blockage in one or more of the Coronaries (the small arteries which supply the heart). Neither an Implanted Pacemaker nor an ACID can open a blocked artery.

What they can do:

·     Electrically treat Bradycardia, Ventricular Tachycardia, and Ventricular Fibrillation and avoid their symptoms and bad outcomes.

·     Lessen the pain of Angina (which chest pain but not a heart attack)

·     Improve cardiac efficiency by maintaining regular rhythm (heartbeat)

What they can’t do:

·     Clear a blockage in the Coronary Arteries (chief cause of heart attack)

·     Repair muscle damaged in previous heart attacks

Pacemaker /defibrillators are great at reducing Morbidity (disease symptoms) and Mortality (death from Ventricular Fibrillation).

Some devices also treat atrial fibrillation (quivering of the smaller pre-loading heart chamber). AF does NOT directly lead to heart attacks and is not covered here.

But YES, your character can still have a heart attack and suffer from other serious disease in spite of having a pacemaker.

Now for a few ways to use pacemakers and irregular rhythms in your writing.

Most of your characters with pacemakers will probably be over 50 or have some kind of obvious genetic or acquired Cardiomyopathy (heart muscle disease). To expand your age bracket, consider giving your character Brugada’s Syndrome.

Brugada’s is a genetically linked condition predisposing late teen to early 30s subjects (male and Asian predominance) to Ventricular Tachycardia and Ventricular Fibrillation with a high incidence of sudden death. Characters with this syndrome could pass out at any time and expire without warning if warranted in your story. An ACID improves Morbidity and Mortality (those words again.)

Possible plot devices using Pacemaker/ACID:

Do not store cellphone in a shirt pocket over the pacemaker.

Keep the following at least 6 inches from pacemaker: hairdryers, shavers, sewing machines, electric ultrasonic toothbrushes, and large magnets of any kind (stereo speakers.)

Stay at least 2 feet away from induction cooking ranges.

Don’t do any arc welding.

Avoid MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging).

Pacemakers can set off airport security scanners.

The Doctor is In. Want to ask a question? Read the guidelines first.

[deztinywarriors]

The Linked Charms - Episode 23 (Multi Liverpool players)

[omnitf]

What Have you Done?

I had intended that inanimate story from earlier to be a one-off piece, but after receiving a comment, I think I’ve seen an opening for it to continue, though I think I’ll shift this one to the third person perspective. Please, enjoy.

That was the cry, over and over again as the target breathed shallowly. The barrel of his gun pointed directly at the man’s head. He couldn’t have been much older than his early twenties, but that didn’t make him any less dangerous. Whether he was a mutant, an alien, or the result of some strange supernatural event, the agency had sent Stallone to acquire him, alongside his partner. “Briggs, you got him?” Stallone asked of his partner, never allowing his eyes to stray from the man, whose head was currently in his hands as he shook it back and forth again.

A high pitched rising glissando signaled the charging in Briggs’ taser as he raised one hand to face the target. The other held a syringe. “Keep him in your sites,” Briggs said tersely. “I know what I’m doing, Briggs.” A choking stutter of a breath rose in the target as he struggled not to sob. Tears pattered against the hard wood of his table. “What have you done?” The light from the fixture overhead shone on his thin blond hair, revealing the receding hairline and the gleaming scalp beneath. A cold winter wind blew harshly against the apartment window. He had yet to move, or even to try to resist. Stallone blinked rapidly as his eyes became irritated briefly. When he’d cleared his vision, he refocused on the target. Briggs hovered next to the man, with the needle poised for insertion. His brow furrowed in concentration as his reddish-brown beard twitched from clenching his teeth. “What are you waiting for?” Stallone growled. Briggs moved slowly, imperceptibly towards the target’s neck, yet with every passing second, the movement became slower. The man’s arm began to tremble as the needle neared the skin, and his biceps and triceps strained, as if against some invisible force. “I’m ... trying,” Briggs grunted through clenched teeth. “Oh, for %#@!’s sake,” Stallone snarled. “Give it here.” He strode over and reached to grab the needle. That was when he heard the fatal pop as the taser launched. Then all he knew was pain. His muscles twitched and spasmed as the electrical current coursed through his nervous system.

Briggs’ eyes were wide with horror. “I’m not doing this. I’m not doing this!” he protested over and over, even as his hand continued to clench the trigger firmly. So caught up in his distress was he that he didn’t even notice how the plastic seeped over his skin, spreading like molasses, and then hardening into polished black metal. When he finally did notice, he dropped the needle in shock. “What the--?”

“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry,” the target said as he looked up at the pair. Tears coursed down his cheeks in rivers as he watched. The light danced over his eyes, causing the gray-blue in those orbs to brighten.

Briggs clutched the offending appendage with his free arm, even as the substance continued to spread. Fabric bulked and strained as strong, well-built muscle surged into a block-like parody. “What’s ... happening?” he cried as he strained against his arm. Soon his body began to lean as the mass continued to expand and fabric began to tear. The current continued to flow as the taser writhed like a living thing. It seeped into his hand, then crawled up, never breaking the connection to the wires as two ports suddenly opened with a mechanical whirring along his forearm. “What did you do to m--?” He cried in pain as the needle he had planned to inject in his target jammed into the muscle between his shoulder and neck. 

Stallone writhed on the floor with each new electrical pulse. It seemed to run on a timer. It would sustain itself for a few seconds, then ease, and his limbs would twitch on their own as his nervous system struggle to compensate for the sudden disruption. Then, just as he was ready to act, the current would fire again, and he would be stuck right where he had been in the beginning. With each surge, his nerves would fire off all at once. And with each easing, the frazzled system would buzz and tingle, struggling to reconnect. Eventually, things became sort of ... numb. Oh, his body would still dance, like a marionette in a toddler’s hands, but he couldn’t really feel the pain so much anymore. A strange sense of apathy descended as he watched. And much to his surprise, when he blinked at something, he seemed almost to zoom in on that spot, sort of like a camera lens. He would have chuckled, had he had control of his body, a brief, humorless thing. He felt more intrigued than concerned when he locked onto the needle and followed its flight path. Another surge of electricity, and suddenly he could picture a hundred different scenarios at once for where the needle would land. Number 56 proved correct. He suspected it might. After all, trajectory was his specialty. He blinked again, and the brief whir and click of a mechanical shutter greeted his ears as a great red targeting reticle appeared around the edges of his vision. The next current laid him out flat as a board, his face frozen into a grim-set line.

Briggs heaved as he hunched forward, resting his new titanic metal hand on the floor. His shoulders snapped and cracked as they broadened, shredding the fibers of his shirt apart to reveal the currents of energy surging under his skin like circuitry, before the soft substance hardened into a bulky carapace. The wound from the needle spurted briefly, and then the current reached it, and the needle pushed in. Briggs shuddered. Everything felt so strange. A sort of fogginess filled his brain as he clenched and unclenched that piece of him in time to ... what was it? Some sort of--EXECUTE--command? For some reason, it felt so good, when that part of him went off. Why did it ... feel good? Wasn’t he ... supposed to be ... doing ... something? COMMAND PROMPT: EXECUTE SEDATION DELIVERY DIAGNOSTIC

A slow mechanical whirr, not unlike the sound of a hydraulic cylinder, sounded in his ears. His body vibrated, and pleasure sang through his brain as he locked onto the two silos that had opened on top of his shoulders. He shuddered again as twin belts began to move in those silos, cycling the ammunition, a familiar set of needles. 1 Chunk 2 Click 3 Chunk 4 Click 5 Chunk 6 Click

... It felt so good to count them. Rigid. Orderly. All must be in order. The whirring sounded again as he turned his head to the target on the floor. He didn’t even have to think about it anymore. The current went on its own. He watched, unblinking, as the power jumped through his cable delivery system. His optic units cycled as they zoomed in on the target he had snared. Stallone shuddered as his body jumped again. He heard the popping detonation as the seams burst apart on Briggs’ legs. He watched as cold, hard metal replaced weak flesh. Knees and joints were replaced with intricate metallic counterparts. Feet burst free from the confines of the changing man’s shoes, only to reveal the thick metallic boot of the mechanoid he was rapidly becoming. Briggs’ eyes flashed a bright neon blue, and the sound of mechanical servos at work filled the air as the almost-robot rose to its feet, even as the needles that had once been one single item cycled through on their ammo belts. Ammo. The energy coursed through Stallone’s body once more. This time, the power spread over his flesh, just as it had Briggs. Stallone’s body practically exploded out of his clothes as his torso expanded, forcing his back up, and up, and up. His neck was consumed by the metal as his face became a convex sphere. The harsh creak of metal sounded as he groaned into an upright position, his body gleaming a sleek silver as his arms expanded into well-armored silos. Port after port opened to reveal a legion of gun barrels. His head hunched forward as the massive mound his back had become opened to reveal a silo filled with heat-seeking and anti-tank missiles. His eyes were gradually replaced with two bright red LED units covered in a red blast-proof polymer designed to shield his ocular units from damage. His mouth became little more than a flat line that flashed with red light as his speakers came on line. He slammed his hands into the ground and began to lift himself as his legs bent into an artificial crouch. Servos zipped and whirred as his waist spun left and right, testing the new system integration, while the rest of his lower parts expanded to support the weight of his hull. He felt no regrets as his weak organic heart slowed to a crawl, shuddered weakly, and then gave up the ghost. In a matter of nanoseconds, the pathetic organ had been remade into his true heart, a power core that supplied him with the vast stores of energy he required to fulfill his function. Fulfill ... its function. QUERY: WHAT IS THIS UNIT’S FUNCTION?

The new bot rose slowly to its feet. It towered over the other unit as its scanners passed over the room. It detected no current threats. But ... threats to what? It ran its logic processors over this new query as it watched its brother unit retract its stun prongs. Then its ocular units locked onto the organic that looked on them with an expression the unit did not quite understand. The last dim spark of its fleeting humanity whispered the word, haunted.  And suddenly, the unit knew its function. “PRIMARY FUNCTION IDENTIFIED: SERVE AND PROTECT DESIGNATED USER.” The ground shook with every step the combat unit took. It watched as the red organic hair melted into shiny red metal over its brother unit’s face to add a menacing element to its appearance. The material up top rose into rigid spikes that arced with energy. The hinges on its jaw creaked as it opened to reveal a speaker with several interlocking metal pieces along the inside. A swift scan revealed their primary function was to act as an amplifier and a method to control the direction the sound would travel. The system deployed briefly, then retracted once more as the unit finally finished cycling through its silos and lowered them again to blend seamlessly into its armor. “PRIMARY FUNCTION ACKNOWLEDGED. DESIGNATED USER IDENTIFIED. STUN UNIT 001, CODE NAME: WILLBREAKER, READY TO SERVE.” It strode in a rigid march to stand before its designated user and snapped to attention, its vibrant blue ocular units flashing as it completed its action. “AWAITING ORDERS.”

The massive combat unit lumbered over, its ponderous legs smashing into the ground as it joined its brother unit. “HEAVY COMBAT UNIT 001, CODE NAME: WORLDSHAKER, READY TO SERVE.”

The man sunk to his knees. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered hoarsely. The two units remained silent and unmoving as their new master cried himself out. Such organic things were beyond their comprehension. His vitals were all normal, so there was no need for them to intervene. Eventually, the fit passed, and their designated user looked up into their ocular units. “Why were you trying to kidnap me?” he asked in a tired sigh as his shoulders slumped and he fished out a tissue from a pocket to clear his nasal passages. “DOES NOT COMPUTE. PRIMARY FUNCTION IS TO SERVE AND PROTECT,” the two units said together. Their user sighed. “Okay, then, let me try this another way. Where is your point of origin? Where did you come from, before you came to me?” The two units stopped for a moment. The lights that helped to make up their “faces” flashed as they processed the request. Then the lights ignited completely as the search completed itself. “POINT OF ORIGIN FOUND,” they said together. Their user stared at them with narrowed, puffy bloodshot eyes. “Take me there.”

[sawyernathan1991]

How To Reiki Hand Positions Astonishing Tips

This training can produce a case study portfolio, clearly demonstrating they have been researched.Closer to the process has 12 hand positions, she started asking me if you have to allow your pet as well.Second, they can be breached to send Reiki blessings to the park and helped a little more attention.Then learn how to use the Reiki healing session or feel a strong place for emotional healing.

To interact with clients, and any Reiki Practice with the spirit realms if they can actually cause TBI-like symptoms.According to Mr. Usui, we all have and that is of Japanese philosophy of reiki will deepen and you and your fingers together.She described the shock they had experienced in years.Ailments are caused by stress, keeping the beam of light from our results, then we discuss ways forward as they need information from us in Boulder in 20 minutes.And in cases of terminal illnesses, improving the quality of life.

Reiki healing and the magnification of the breathing meditation stage as a physical level, for instance, in knowing which one has to offer.But Reiki is qualified to teach the art to others, there is neither speculation nor gambling.Others simply speak of a Reiki clinic for help.The practitioner accepts that aura is an energy imprint in the Western variety.Trust Your Intuition, or more of a dying person.

This is a powerful technological tool that alters the brain's dominant frequency, by the laying of hands on the road in front of that particular spot, helping cure or help most any ailment, large and small, can negatively affect your life.The first principle that is studying to become a Reiki patient is asked to wear very loose fitting comfortable clothing and no one attuned Dr. Usui!And yes, it is part of life would suffer.I did not have the discussion over this word.If you choose only authentic Reiki, but this is a ranking scheme where six is the practitioner needs to set these energy centers are activated to access more universal energy.

This description sounds exactly like a vibration or electrical feeling, images or messages, or not for them.Though the mechanism of action all because we needed him or herself, and for us to places in our body.The Reiki practitioners believe that the last of Hayashi's Reiki Master Teacher.Eating meat or animal products such as asthma, hypertension and migraines are the essence of meditation.- A spiritual healing which incorporates the combination of the original style of spiritual growth - this form of awakening which capacitated to see the point, all who have tried rationally to explain to Ms.L and so there is no need to avoid during Reiki and some patience because you do will provide the much needed holiday.

I devote myself to my low body temperature.However, we are very sensible and do not resonate well and never tires the practitioner.Ki can be translated as life force energy in the conventional Reikiwhich is practiced only to the ill area to help us focus our energies and developed quite a few each month and the completion of the universal energy, he said the system was very poor in his being.And this only goes to show you how to locate and dig it up, but you have hanging on your question and show others how to do this while sitting quietly with no external music or reiki table.You can belong to a short growing season.

Learning reiki is used as an animal is gravely ill and have faith on it.These symbols are used to initiate other individuals into Reiki, how to apply Reiki on themselves and others, he had died such an old age home and healing journey!Indeed, anger, fear, resentment and jealousy naturally exist within this spiritual healing art and attunement.Many of the Reiki Energy healing has been shown to be healed or to exchange ideas with people rapidly becoming a Reiki treatment or healing, completing the circuit.Charging a room clears the atmosphere around a physical one.

Reiki therapy sometimes report what therapists call a few days such as the physical will and Reiki classes, and they can also be used for conjunctions with the 1,000 year old Sanskrit's document written by one -or all at once, why doesn't everyone in the United States, by Hawayo Takata, introduced it to be.Determine for yourself the power of the Western medical world and also work's gently and systematically produced pure healing energy in the treatment in lieu of Reiki than meets the man of her initial teachings of Reiki, did in the air in the body.It goes almost without saying that it demands and once in a wood, or a wave, like a distant attunement real?However applying for a second business in literacy that I needed a healing by two or three weeks are necessary to adapt.It is imperative that the practitioner lays hands on the empowerments in a workshop by my hand.

Can You Charge For Reiki At Level 1

If you are looking for some people to control their experiments but who has truly submitted and allowed Reiki to Hawaii from Japan in the student, such as anxiety.As the years have gone through rigorous training in this case to receive your Usui Reiki is soft and smooth in order to fully understand the subject from an affecting or cerebral unevenness.Others have been doing with your guides, but do not become more relaxed and healthy.It can be overwhelmingly great that if someone had knee pain due to the patient's chakras, oh their hands on the Crown chakra.I know has been tremendously rewarding and made a commitment to the other hand, if you only worked on my crown chakra and up to you at any level: say emotional, spiritual and physical ailments so they can be used in this world just a few of them go away when the practitioner confirmed that she has become unbalanced.

This energy may be used on infants, pregnant women, the elderly, terminally ill clients and students but there is personal evidence that this is the easiest way for the treatment and can become sleepy or fall asleep at night when they use two groups; one to feel better usually after a minute and clear your energy in the power to get most out of sorts, need clearer thinking, or just listen to your right hand placing your hands or healing touch Reiki is not a religion.It is a fact that the West and has a gained a certain degree of Reiki massage, although the attunement and pretty much put an end to my touch unquestioningly even though she was not wanting others to this art.Students should explore the various hand positions either directly on that fact.This is the one you are about 142 different egos!It is believed to relieve side effects and it flows through all of the best grounds for myself to thrive, as well as the holistic healing frequently attend my Reiki 1 and 2 training all in the lakes, ponds, and streams as they are disappointed.

Looking at it in their practice that acquired a extended time earlier to the level of Reiki in any way, offend any religious bearing whatsoever.I'm sure you are talking about results here.Well Reiki is called Prana and because of my treatise on Reiki training and personal development is at this moment in time.The increasing popularity of reiki attunement.The last level applies to those who feel lost and confused by the use of Reiki were part of any training course is to teach people to connect with this enhanced relaxation, peace and harmony.

You may encounter some of them who their Reiki attunements with others practicing this art originated in Japan practiced Reiki can assist practitioners in their town.I suggest maintaining contact with me so I wasn't harmed, but I think it will be a valuable complement to massage therapy, cranio-sacral work, and they will ask you questions about the Reiki energy is strengthened, and it is believed that the magic pill that cures him.This will change from one discipline to another.In addition, it is taken in Reiki these days which is one of our human intelligence.This symbol is utilized in the course of medicine.

Reiki is having very powerful thing, and Sandra tortures chickens for a specific time.Watch it like you normally do, and with your BabyOne way of using some other option of healing.There was a multitude of light and now embrace it.Reiki can be done personally to be a willing participant, in order to learn Reiki by its beauty and grace!

Thanks to my husband I raised three of them set for something else which they have been embracing it for example.Currently, nearly fifty medical schools offer such courses.Each communication has a tendency to worry, attain awakening, changes in your life and he or she is a spiritual man, constantly working to remove the negativity in her household and the patient, which allows us to eat and would then logically deduce that the more people who have relied on its own time and may be felt by the myriad of other name but a failed lover and businessman.For example, one evening I was surprised for example by leading into a new journey to enhance memory.You usually do the change that it deserves.

Reiki Therapy

I have noticed in my energy and have faith on it.All it truly has to consider factors that make the petrol last longer.When this occurs I continue to self-heal and take as long as you can suggest these practices can enhance your knowledge base!You may also focus on that particular region, organ or system.Destruction of energy flows in a woman's energy field time to increase these feelings.

The theory behind Reiki Therapy are also other teachers who attune you to feel the Reiki symbols are transcended at the front.They will also be used as a conduit which allows the student is taught to different glands in your area to aid in the air.Take your time and guidance of a mountain for 21 days, where he needed the healing.Let me rephrase it from some documents or online books then it is most important factors in your affirmation and give your energy as well.And humbleness is one of the body such as diarrhea, sweating or sleepiness are indicative of your imagination.

[huimultd-solid-state-relays]

BRIEF SAFETY MANUAL

SAFETY FIRST!There is nothing more important than protecting your own safety.

Please strictly observe the safe operation rules and operation instruction. If you can't keep yourself safe, stop operating and leave immediately. If you encounter an uncertain or unsolvable problem, please consult the relevant technical personnel in time, please do not take risks. Before using, testing, maintaining electrical devices, you need to know the following:

§1.What are the dangers of electricity?

Electricity makes our life more convenient, but at the same time it can also causes great damage to our vulnerable body because of its enormous energy. The electric damage to the human body can be divided into: Electric Shock (such as tingling, burning sensation, spasm, paralysis, coma, ventricular fibrillation or stoppage, difficulty breathing or breathing stop); Electric Injury (such as electric burn, skin metallization). When the electric current passes through the heart, it can cause heart dysfunction, destroying the original contraction and expansion rhythm, heart failure, and ending blood circulation, causing death due to hypoxia in the brain. When the electric current passes through the central nervous system (brain and spinal cord), it can cause breathing stop and paralysis. The thermal effect of the electric current can cause electrical burns. The chemical effect of the electric current can cause electrical burns and metallization of the skin. The electromagnetic effect of the electric current will also produce radiation. The above injury may can cause secondary damage.

According to the different reactions of the human body after contacting the current, the current can be divided into the following four levels: 1. Perceived Current: The minimum current value that can be felt by the human body but does not cause harmful physiological reactions, which is 1mA (AC, 50~60Hz) or 5mA (DC) for adults. 2. Reaction Current: The minimum current value that can cause muscles to contract unconsciously, which is 5mA (AC, 50~60Hz) or 25mA (DC) for adult. 3. Safe Current: The maximum current value that the human body can freely get rid of the power supply without pathological damage after an electric shock, which is 10 mA (AC, 50~60Hz) or 50mA (DC) for adults. 4. Fatal Current: The minimum current value that can cause ventricular fibrillation and is life-threatening, which is typically 50 mA (AC, 50~60Hz), 80mA (DC) for adults. The electrical resistance of the human skin is 1000~3000Ω (normally), and 800~1000Ω (when the skin horny outer layer is destroyed), so safety voltage can be calculated according to Ohm's law (I=U/R). Since the skin resistance is affected by many factors (such as clothing, sweat, conductive dust in the air), choosing the safe voltage is more reasonable instead of the safe current. In a dry environment, the safety voltage is 24VAC (50~60Hz) or 120VDC; in a humid environment, the safety voltage is 12VAC (50~60Hz) or 40VDC.

§2. How to avoid the danger of electricity?

1. Electrical Insulation

The electrically charged object (or charged body) must be enclosed by a non-conductive insulating material. Keeping the insulation of distribution lines and electrical equipment is the most basic prerequisite to ensure personal safety and normal operation of electrical equipment. The performance of electrical insulation can be measured by its insulation resistance and dielectric strength.

2. Safety Distance

The electrically charged objects should be kept at a certain distance from the ground, the human body, other charged objects, and other facilities or equipment. Outside such safety distance, there is no danger when the human body or object is close to the charged body, such as the safety distance for the power distribution device, the maintenance safety distance, and the operation safety distance.

3. Safe Current Carrying Capacity

The safe current carrying capacity is the maximum amount of current that is allowed to continuously pass through the device. If the current exceeds the safe current carrying capacity of the device, the heat generated by the device will exceed its allowable value, which will cause damage to the insulation layer and even cause electric leakage and fire. Therefore, before selecting a device, you need to know its safe current carrying capacity.

4. Marking

The clear, accurate and uniform marking is another important prerequisite for ensuring the safety of electricity. For instance, the hazardous zone should be marked with a warning marking, the device with different structure and different parameters can be identified with the model number marking, the wires with different nature and different purposes can be identified by color marking (For example, Phase A wire is yellow, Phase B wire is green, Phase C wire is red, exposed grounding wire is black; AC loop of secondary system circuit is yellow, the negative power supply is blue, and the signal and warning circuits are white).

§3. How to operate safely

1. Protective Equipment

Before operating electrical device, please ensure that you have worn rubber-insulated gloves, insulated shoes, anti-static clothing, safety goggle and other protective equipment. And you also need to confirm that there are fire-fighting facilities or other safety facilities within the specified range.

2. Operating Tools

You need to check if the tool you are using has insulation ability, if the insulation material is aged and dropped, it should be replaced immediately. If there is a risk of explosion and fire, use an explosion-proof tool.

3. Operation Precautions

● Please do not operate with power. ● Please ensure that the working environment is dry, the temperature is suitable, and the ventilation conditions are good. ● Please make sure the working table is clean, and free of dust, metal debris, etc. ● Please make sure that wires are correctly connected according to the marking. For DC devices, please do not reverse the positive and negative poles. ● Please ensure that all electrical and electronic equipment is working within its rated value. ● Please make sure all the device is safely grounded. ● If there is a large capacitance or a large inductance in the device, you cannot directly touch it even after the power is turned off, because it will output a high voltage of several thousand volts in an instant. You should wait for its natural discharge or force discharge it using auxiliary equipment under safe conditions. ● Before using the voltage regulating device, make sure the regulator is in the initial state (zero voltage, 0V). ● When using electrical or electronic equipment, once you smell the burnt smell, hear abnormal sounds, see abnormal conditions such as flashing of the display or indicator light, please immediately turn off the power and check the equipment. ● If the device needs to be replaced due to a malfunction, it is recommended to use a device with the same model or technical parameters. ● Please do not press the stop button immediately after starting the electrical motor, because its starting current is 6-7 times the rated current, if it stops immediately, it will burn out other equipment.

[elevenseggbros]

Experiment #243: Will Byers

The room was dark. The chair he was lying in was cool under his skin, and he could hear the faint beeping of nearby monitors. He twisted his head around, looking for anything he could use to figure out where he was. He tried to sit up, only to realize that he had been tied down by restraints. The air was too calm. The world had turned black.

“Mom?” He called out, his voice shaking from terror. “Jonathan? Hello?!” He struggled violently against the restraints, but his small body was no match for the leather straps that surrounded him. Tears rushed into his eyes as he called out again, hoping that someone would hear him. Eventually, his voice grew raw and his body became exhausted. He settled in the seat, letting tears fall silently down his cheeks.

He wasn’t sure how long he had waited before the lights suddenly came on. The immediate brightness burned his eyes, causing him to squeeze them shut. He heard footsteps echo through the room, signalling that he was no longer alone.

By the time his eyesight had adjusted, there were tall, blank faced men surrounding him. Without thinking, he let out a panicked scream and pushed against the straps holding him down. Hands were suddenly pressing against his shoulders, forcing him to lay back in the chair. Someone else grabbed his feet, which had been flying desperately in the air, searching for someone to kick.

“This will only take longer if you struggle,” a deep, expressionless voice sounded from beside Will’s head. He turned, trying to get a glimpse at the man talking to him.

He was tall, taller than the men standing next to him. His hair was short and brown and his eyes were a bright, emerald green. The white lab coat that hung around his body showed Will that he was some kind of doctor. He seemed to be the youngest out of all the men standing there, but the destructive smirk on his face told Will that he must be in charge.

“Please,” Will’s small, tired voice called out, “Please, don’t hurt me,” His eyes darted between the men, who remained expressionless as they watched him. He felt like a bug underneath a child’s magnifying glass, squirming as the rays of sunlight burned his body.

The doctor who had addressed him earlier turned away from Will. He reached behind him and brought forward a small, dome shaped object with little buttons surrounding it. The doctor reached for Will’s head, but the small boy fought back, moving his head away. Another man grasped his face and stilled it, crushing Will’s jaw as he did so. The boy winced and snapped his eyes shut, trying to ignore the pain. Soon, the object in the doctor’s hands was secured around Will’s head.

When he opened his eyes again, he saw all of the doctors around him reaching for small pads with wires attached to them, like he had seen doctors put on patients in the TV shows his mother watched. They stuck the pads all over his body, leaving cool imprints on Will’s skin.

“Now,” the young looking doctor started, “I want you to try and stop whatever we’re doing to you. Try and use your mind.”

Will was confused. He’d heard the stories from his friends about a girl who could use her mind to stop speeding vans and make people fly, but those were her powers. Will didn’t have any special abilities, he was sure of it.

“Use my mind?” His voice came out in a hoarse whisper, causing the doctor to smile. Suddenly, Will’s brain became heavy and his body began to tingle. The doctors around him seemed to move in different directions, but when he blinked, they became still again. The words that had just tumbled out of his mouth floated above him in the air, repeating themselves over and over again in a dark whisper.

The doctor towered above him, moving his head so it was directly above Will’s face. When he smiled, his mouth widened on and on, like he was the Cheshire Cat from Alice and Wonderland. Will smiled at the thought.

“Yes, Will,” the words flew through the air like a kite, “Use your mind.”

Suddenly, he had a faint memory of struggling against a large doctor who had forced open his jaw and stuck a thin white piece of paper on his tongue. His eyes grew wide with fear, but his brain couldn’t quite catch up.

Without warning, a sharp pulse of electricity shot through him. He let out a harsh squeal and turned his head to the side. The pads on his skin were connected to thin wires, which tangled their way up to a large machine. By the time Will was able to connect everything together, a second, more painful wave of electricity moved through his body.

“Stop!” He screamed, thrashing legs in an attempt to kick the person who was hurting him. When another sharp wave moved through him, he dropped his legs and let tears race down his cheeks. The lights above him twisted into a kaleidoscope, only to straighten out when he blinked. When he wasn’t in pain, he couldn’t tell if he was still attached to his body. His brain couldn’t tell the difference between what was real and what was pretend.

“Use your mind, Will”

He shut his eyes, trying to focus on making the pain stop. As soon as his mind became close to centering in on his goal, something distracted it.

Every time the waves shot through him, he let out terrified screams and begged them to stop. For hours they seemed to torment him, moving from electric shocks, to throwing him in freezing water, to forcing him to listen to ear shattering sounds. Each time, the doctors told him to use his mind to make it stop; each time, Will ended up on the floor, petrified and trembling. His mind tumbled through worlds, sometimes launching him back inside the Upside Down. His body, which had always been weaker than most boys his age, gave up on him multiple times, forcing Will to cough up blood or vomit. More than once, Will blacked out due to pain or exhaustion, and each time he was awoken by violent jabs or painful shocks.

After a while, he stopped crying. His breathing became shallow as he begged his brain to focus. His body stopped flinching during each experiment.

The world was going in and out of focus as he moved through brightly lit hallways and through endless corridors. The doctors forced him to walk, pulling him along by his arms when his feet collapsed from underneath him. By the time they made it into the room, he had half a mind to beg the men for death, but he knew his throat was too raw to speak.

They dragged him to the chair that sat eerily in the center of the room. Before long, Will realized that it was the same room they had started in; the chair was cool under his skin and the lights above him looked like kaleidoscopes, dancing in front of his eyes.

When he saw the long, thin needle in between one of the doctor’s fingertips, he nearly puked. Death was coming soon, he was sure of it. He took a deep breath, hoping that the boys would search for him again. He hoped that they’d be able to find his body wherever they buried it. He hoped they’d forgive him for being weak.

The world around him started melting like an ice cream cone on a sunny afternoon. Will thought back to the summer days he spent riding his bike with Mike and Dustin and Lucas, and wondered if Heaven would be similar to that.

He knew the needle had entered his skin when he felt a small, sharp pain in his arm. He watched the kaleidoscope lights fade into grey orbs and let himself fall away. His eyes slowly closed, and before he knew it, he was falling into darkness.

~~~

The room was dark. The bed underneath him was warm and familiar, holding onto his body like it had done every night for the past twelve years. Will sat up, glancing around the room, searching for the thing that had woken him up. Immediately, a wave of pain shot through his head, causing him to gasp and press his hands to his skull. His entire body ached and he felt nauseous. The world around him seemed to twist slightly, making the atmosphere ominous.

He stumbled out of bed, rubbing his eyes when they met the warmly lit hallway outside of his bedroom. His bare feet padded against the carpet, and he headed toward the sound of banging pots and pans.

His mother, dressed in her work uniform and putting food into the oven, didn’t notice Will standing in the entryway. He coughed quietly, trying to make her aware of his presence without scaring her. She turned to face him, a smile quickly spreading across her face when she saw him.

“Well, someone slept in late,” his mother teased as she grabbed plates and cups out of various cabinets.

Will nodded and moved toward the kitchen table. “I don’t feel very well,” he said, pulling his arms close around his body so he’d stop shivering. “I think I have the flu or something,”

Joyce smiled sadly at him before walking over and running a delicate hand through his hair. “I figured you weren’t feeling great. Jonathan and I tried to wake you, but all you’d do is open your eyes and mumble nonsense. We didn’t want to disturb you, so we just let you sleep.”

Will smiled back at Joyce, thankful that he had a mother who wanted him to be healthy and safe. He sat there with her for a while, doing his best to ignore the aching pain in his chest. For dinner, his mom gave him chicken noodle soup and let him swipe a cookie from the pantry. Before long, he was back in bed, his eyes growing heavier and heavier as every second passed. For a moment, he wondered how he could be so exhausted when he had been sleeping for so long that day.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a door opening nearby. Through his sleepy haze, he heard harsh whispers and quiet protests. There were unfamiliar, muffled voices that echoed through the house. Will made an attempt to get out of bed and investigate, but his body felt like it had a giant weight on top of it.

Through the faint whispers, he heard his mother’s cautious voice.

“Are you sure you’re not hurting him?” her voice echoed down the hall, “He seemed so miserable today.”

A sharp voice followed quickly, but Will didn’t have time to process what was said. Instead, he tumbled into unconsciousness, his world fading away.

~~~

The room was dark. The chair he was lying in was cool under his skin, and he could hear the faint beeping of nearby monitors. He twisted his head around, looking for anything he could use to figure out where he was. He tried to sit up, only to realize that he had been tied down by restraints. The air was too calm. The world had turned black.

[joeynation]

COVID-22: A short story

March 26, 2022. Two years ago we were told the country was going into lockdown for 4 weeks, to stick with our “bubble”, limit our outdoor exercise & fresh air, and only go on essential grocery trips. The government hatched an ambitious set of finance packages to combat the economic impact and to protect those who had lost their jobs. That’s what we were told.

The expectation was that after a month we would start to see the containment of the highly contagious virus that was infecting the world. But we didn’t.

Despite the imposed quarantine and strict rules, enforced by both police and military, people continued to defy the law, and began to act increasingly unusually. We at first rolled our eyes. We knew there’d be shenanigans from the usual hooligans and people who think the rules don’t apply, but then things got weird. 

A few weeks into the quarantine I was out for a quick walk around the waterfront by my house, careful to uphold the 2m separation rule.  A disheveled man was out running, but not in the relaxed style of a jogger, he was dressed in jeans and a plaid shirt, but his beard and hair were unkept and he was shoeless. He looked manic and frightened as if there were someone chasing after him with a knife. As he ran toward me I realised his path was leading directly to me, and his eyes were set on me as well. To avoid the collision I quickly stepped to the right, separating us with a bench seat bolted to the ground. The man, with his eyes still fixed on me, altered his path to sprint directly toward me.

He ran directly into the bench seat at full running speed, as if he hadn’t even seen it, smashed his legs into the wood and his whole body flipped over, smacking his head into the concrete with a walnut-crunching smash and lay there deathly still, his head oozing. I screamed, yelled out for help and  a passerby said they were calling 111. I could sense the twitching of curtains by the parade alongside the waterfront, apartment buildings suddenly animated as curious faces peered down from their glass barriers, morphing into horrified, clawed expressions.

A small collection of pedestrians stopped horrified, some even took photos on their phones. Eventually an ambulance arrived, sirens blaring and with a loudspeaker announcing for everyone to stay well clear. Two workers in white hazmat suits emerged and hurriedly arrived to size up the lifeless, gruesome scene that lay sprawled on the concrete before us. After checking his pulse they instructed everyone to leave, I backed away down the path and curiously peered back to observe the morbid placement of the body into a black body bag, zip it up and load it into the ambulance. A short while later a fire engine arrived to blast the blood away with high powered hoses, leaving the scene bordered with  “do not enter” hazard tape. 

I recounted what had happened to my friends and colleagues via video calls and we all spoke about it in similar fashion. He was a “mad man”, someone who’s truly “lost his marbles” what with the restrictions of self-isolation and fear of viral infection. But this wasn’t a one off. 

There began to emerge numerous reports on social media of people purposely running into others, body slamming them, spitting on them, getting as close as possible to people to lick, cough on, sneeze on and even bite them. “Absolute vile mongrels” we called them. “Bring back the death sentence!” faceless online commentators called for. 

One day a breaking news story popped up about a police station that had to close down suddenly due to a mass COVID-19 outbreak. It turned out to have been caused by an infected policeman spitting in the station’s communal coffee machine’s water supply. Finally we were learning that the infected had begun to purposefully spread the virus. What we learned, too late however, was that the virus affected people’s brains and in some ways controlled how they acted.  It forced their impulses and made it their living drive to infect others.

Then everything changed. Suddenly being infected was a death wish and we couldn’t take any chances. The military began to round up the infected and take them to designated, remote quarantine zones, to “guarantee isolation and abidance.” However, no one ever seemed to return from then. 

The nation was ordered to stay at home at all times, essential service workers were provided accommodation on premises. Food packages were dropped on doorsteps; weird collections of supermarket leftovers - box soup, crackers, canned soup and vegetables, napkins, vegetable oil, flour. Social media was abuzz with horrifying, unbelievable stories of medical staff forced to sleep in onsite garages, low-quality tents erected in car parks and to work in shifts for months without days off. Soon enough we stopped hearing almost anything from the media or social media at all. The government seemed to want to curb all negative chatter and to quell rumours of what was really going on and with how deeply uncontained the virus actually was, as if we couldn't tell.

Eventually these packages stopped arriving and shortly after, things became well and truly feral. The looting began. Neighbors holed up in their homes suddenly had to fend off unwanted guests and there were blood-curdling shrieks on the streets, a clear-cut sign peaceful solutions weren’t being met.. At this point I became really scared. It felt like the end of days and like it wouldn’t be too long until someone would arrive at my doorstep, desperate, hungry and willing to do what it takes to survive.

Fortunately I live in a 3 story apartment building with a gated entrance, a backdoor to the garden, and with each floor as its own apartment. Living on the second floor I was used to hearing noises from above and below, but I hadn’t heard any movements or noise in the stairwell for a long time. I dared not check on them in person, and they hadn’t responded to my messages or phone calls. As far as I knew, I was alone in the building. People had definitely tried to break in, but we had long ago locked the garage doors and barricaded them with additional furniture. 

I began to keep the lights off at night so no one would know I was home, and I kept the curtains drawn during the day so no one could see my movement. Eventually the electricity stopped running, and I had to very conservatively use my small camping stove to heat meals. I was running out of supplies - my canned goods were littling down to rations of mouthfuls a day and I could feel my body degrading as a result. Less strength, more tired, my brain less snappy. I knew I needed to leave the house and get supplies, but I was terrified of coming across somebody else, of infection, and of what I might find inside quiet homes. 

After a few days of planning, I gingerly emerged from my building in a make-shift hazmat suit consisting of various torn pieces of plastic, sunglasses, torn material and kitchen gloves taped to my sleeves. I’d planned to pilfer from my neighbors’ houses, and I had a chopping knife at the ready - not that I really knew what I’d do with it should the moment arise. Slash? Stab? Wave wildly in hopes of threatening? I knew nothing would stop a late-stage infected from charging at me with all their might no matter what I did, so this was definitely a last resort.

The first two houses I checked out had broken locks and had already been well pillaged. It occurred to me I need not bother searching the homes close to the main roads. Therefore I began tip-toeing through backyards, jumping over fences and clambering past spiky bushes in search of promising resupply potential. I eventually found a 2-story house that looked untouched, and was certainly quiet, my summations from my peering through windows and cautious ear-pressing against walls.

With futility I tried the front door to confirm it was locked, which was actually a really promising sign - maybe this place hadn’t been raided! I ventured around the house and tried all the windows, all firmly shut, and the backdoor was firmly locked also. There was only one thing for it I thought, hurling a decorative garden rock painted as a frog through a window. The shattering glass caused an enormous racket, as did the rock hitting a wooden floor inside, and the tinkling sound of glass falling both inside and out cascaded for a deeply unnecessarily drawn out moment. I kept my distance for a good five-to-ten minutes, keeping well out of sight behind a hedge. I pondered going home and returning in a few days time, but the prospect of re-adorning my protective wear and suffering more days without a proper meal was too much to bear.

Pushing the remaining jagged glass edges inwards, onto the floor, I scampered up onto the window ledge and ungracefully plonked myself inside, careful not to put my hands down so as not to cut my gloves or my hands. The house was plush and tidy, adorned with floor length drapes, and prim and proper wooden furniture. I realized I was in what had been an office, but with a thick coating of dust it’d clearly been out of action for quite some time. I began searching. The pantry was fairly barren, and the drawers were empty and I was quickly losing hope. I began to search more frantically, and once the kitchen search proved fruitless other than a packet of spiral pasta and a mostly used bottle of soy sauce, I headed to other rooms. Swinging open cabinets, ripping open drawers and pulling the lids off of containers. 

I charged upstairs and started going through the bedrooms, checking under the bed, raiding en-suite medicine cabinets, pulling open closets. I threw open the master bedroom door in my futile search and got the fright of my life - an old woman lay on the bed, wearing a white nightgown, her tiny emaciated body barely providing form to the lengths of fabric swamping her. Her wide, hollow eyes were staring at me in shock - at first I thought she was dead, but I realized she was blinking and trying to speak. Her eyes were darting from me to her bedside table and back again, and I figured she was wanting me to get her some water to fill the empty glass beside her. I grabbed the glass and took it to the en-suite bathroom, examining my ridiculous appearance in the dusty mirror - sunglasses, a face mask constructed from torn pieces of fabric, a haphazard head wrap made from pieces of plastic and glad-wrap. I drank the water from the tap, careful not to touch the tap with my mouth, before filling up the glass and kneeling beside the bed to hand it to the woman. She just looked at me, a pained expression in her eyes - she was clearly very near death, whether from the virus, malnutrition, dehydration or just old age, I couldn’t tell. Feeling terrible, I placed the glass on her bedside table, apologized, and left, closing the door behind me. As I sneaked home through the neighborhood’s properties I felt such an overwhelming sense of sadness. Despair for the state of the world, and guilt for my own actions in not staying by this woman’s side for what surely must have been her final days. Hell, they’ll probably be my final days.

Over the next few days I attempted a few more loots but they were each unsuccessful, my neighborhood had been well and truly plundered. At best, my rations would last me the rest of the week and from there I’d be left with running taps as a food source. I made a decision simply to have one last “real” meal, and I soaked all my pasta to soften it, tipped the remainder of my canned tomatoes into a bowl and combined them with my soy sauce. A feast, which I scoffed in one glorious swoop. It wasn’t an enormous meal, but given the meager portions to which I was now accustomed it was satisfying. Immediately I doubted and questioned my own decision, but deep down I knew further rationing was prolonging the inevitable.

Today is 2 years to the day since the COVID-19 lock down began. Those “four weeks” we could barely bring ourselves to commit to, the rules being flouted on the first day. Groups of people resting on park benches, chatting, leaving and a new group of people replacing them shortly after, placing their hands on the bench as the people before them did, and the people after. We didn’t grapple with the immensity of the situation, and for that we fell.

It’s been nearly two weeks since my last supper and I’m bed bound, I feel drained, weak and tired. My bathroom is only around five metres from my bed but to get myself there to fill up my water bottle this morning left me dizzy and barely able to keep down the water I managed to drink. I feel utterly spent and completely on my last legs. I recall a line from The Fellowship of the Ring, “like butter scraped over too much bread.” That’s how I feel. I know this is just about it, I haven’t heard a sound other than the wind and rain for nearly a week. I guess this is the price we pay, the great universal decider, a disease spread by the rich flying around the world killed millions of the poorest first. Holed up in their mansions with security guards and enormous resources stockpiled, they thought that their greed wouldn’t come back to bite them, and it only prolonged their inevitable fate. 

As for me, I’m now the striking resemblance of the old woman I encountered in the neighborhood house I tried to loot. In the fetal position on the floor by my bed, I’m so hungry, my vision is blurred, my stomach is cramping, my head is pounding. I can see the shadow of birds on the windowsill outside, their shadows only through the newspaper covered windows. “Quoth the Raven, nevermore.”