#or unless I go pick up the leash and ask who wants to go walkies

[dinosaurcharcuterie]

Our 12-yo dog has decided this year he's gonna stop shedding just hair, as his pug heritage requires, and instead start shedding like a cocker spaniel, which should be nowhere in the last ten to twenty generations of his DNA. Just clumps of dead hair requiring manual removal.

When did we realize this? Five days after the groomer gave him a puppy cut. The groomer didn't notice either, because he's never done that ever before.

He knows what a brush is and is relatively fine with them. He knows what the eye-gunk comb is, and is not okay with that. But that's the only thing that'll shift his fur right now.

Oh, and that pug DNA gives him a wrinkly back.

I spent twenty minutes manipulating his back skin in ways he associates only with getting shaved, using a brush which he knows should go on a face in an area he was pretty sure he had no face (but what if he was WRONG?), occasionally getting stuck on clumps of fur that somehow don't pull as hard as he knows they should.

And when I was done with doing things that should have been awful but somehow weren't, he was visibly bewildered that he was no longer itchy. And also about an inch thinner around his torso. He's not sure what just happened, but he was Fussed With, so he knows he's in the right for sulking.

[teenage-mutant-ninja-freak]

sub! Donnie one shot

“Hi! I love your sub! Donnie headcanons! It's so hard to find sub! turtles! Would you be willing to write a smutty sub Don one shot with a fem! Reader please? Thank you!!!“

Donnie x fem! reader

NSFW, sub/dom relationships, fem dom. 

_____________

“Go and pick out your favourite collar” you purr into Donnie’s ear

He bounces to the corner of the room where you keep all of your equipment and picks out his go-to collar, a light purple one with a dog bone on the front which has his name inscribed.  You had gotten it for his this part Christmas and he was ecstatic when he opened the box.

He returns the collar to you and you delicately place it around his neck and fasten the leash onto the little metal ring the collar has.

“Now, you remember your safe word? Tell me what it is”

“Red, mistress”

“Such a clever boy” his eyes light up at your praise. It’s sickeningly sweet how ready fro you he is. One “good boy” or “that’s it, pet” and he’s already rocking a semi. Tonight was no different.

“Now, on your knees” he does as he’s told, falling down to his knees with a harsh thud on the floor and you begin to pull him by the collar towards the bed. You sit down, legs crossed, and look him in the eyes. He looks back at you, this is mistake number one. You raise your hand a give him a sharp slap across the face, turning his cheek a bruised shade of green from the impact.

“Did I say you could look me in the eyes?” you keep your cool, calm, authoritative voice.

“No, mistress” he looks down at the floor.

You mutter “stupid little pig” under your breath but loud enough for him to hear. You know he gets off on degradation just as much as praise.

“Now, does little piggy want to go for a walk?” his shoulders slump, this part is always humiliating for him but secretly he loves that. “Let’s go walkies” you shake the lead slightly so he’ll start moving and Donnie begins to crawl around your room, eyes still to the ground, on all fours like a pig would.

“Snort for me, little piggy!” you command, he does as you bid and begins to make little oinking sounds as he pretends to sniff things in your shared room. You can see the shame on his face, shame that he has to do this, shame that he enjoys doing this....

You tug the leash to bring him back to you and once he’s within arms reach you uncross your legs, spreading them wide, and pull him by the back of the head so that his face is between your thighs. He immediately sets to work, licking and nipping at your sex, desperately trying to prove his worth with his tongue.

“You may be a useless animal, but you have one hell of a mouth” you moan out. Donnie attempts to place his hands on your hips to give himself a better grip but you swat them away- he knows he’s not allowed to touch you unless you say it’s alright. He continues running his tongue around and over your clit and kissing and lapping at your pussy until your close but then you push his head away. You place your foot at his shoulder and give him a kick to push him backwards so that he lies on his shell on the floor. You get up off the bed and walk around him, allowing him to get a good view of your body. You can see him member straining through the fabric of him pants and you know how badly he wants you.

You’re feeling nice today, you’ll give him what he wants.

“Clothes off. Now” Donnie springs into action, shaking off his pants in no time until he’s bare skin, completely exposed on the ground beneath you.

“I enjoy you like this, when you know your place is at my feet” you chuckle.

You straddle his lap and place his cock between your wet folds, rocking back and forth slightly as to coat him in your juices. He whimpers, he wants to be inside of you so badly and you know this, so you take your time.

Finally, you line him up with your entrance and sink down onto him. You have to stifle your own moan as to not give away how badly you want him in return but any sounds you made were covered by Donnie mewling beneath you. Once he’s sheathed inside of you, you give yourself a second to get accustomed to his size, no matter how many time you had fucked, it always surprised you how big he is. Then you get to work, you raise yourself up off your hips and sink back down on to him abruptly which causes him to moan loudly. 

“Arms above your head” you command and he does as instructed, this is torture for him as all he wants is to touch you.

You bounce up and down on his cock, enjoying the sighs and little moans he makes as well as the odd giggle, Donnie’s a giggler after all. Your movements become faster and more erratic, you can tell from his sharp breaths that he’s getting close but he’s gonna have to beg you if he wants to cum.

“Tell me what you need?” you ask

“Please” he moans breathlessly “Please just let me cum, I need it”

“Make me believe it, honey” you encourage

“I need you so badly, you’re the only one who can do this to me. I can’t sleep, can’t eat, can’t cum without you! Please!” 

You smile at this Donnie was always one for the dramatics. You lean down and tell him to open his mouth as you quicken your pace once again on his dick.

“Open your mouth” you whisper, and so he does. Leaning in further you purse your lips and spit directly into the back of his throat, lifting his chin slightly to close his mouth and he swallows hard.

“Thank you, mistress” he moans. The authority of you being able to treat him however you want turns him on to the extreme. You can see his hands twitching above his head and so you remind him

“Only good boys get to cum, that means no touching” 

Donnie balls his hands into fists and plants them firmly on the ground above his head and that’s when you see the shift in his movements, he goes still and silent for all of a moment before arching his back and erupting into a breathless, hoarse moan as he cums deep inside of you. You smile slightly as you ride him out, still waiting for your own release that is soon to follow. You touch yourself as you bob up and down on him and soon the knot in your stomach comes undone and you places your hands on his chest to steady yourself as you climax.

You lean down to caress his cheek and he’s still panting, as are you. 

“You did so well, baby” you praise. He looks up at you and smiles sweetly, placing his hands on your waist now the the scene is over and he can finally touch you again. You get up off of him and give him a helping hand to stand up, kissing him gently on the cheek as you do.

“Ok, let’s go get cleaned up” you suggest

“Shower together?” He inquires.

“Of course, baby, I wouldn’t have it any other way” you say

Fin

[ladyiceflame-blog]

An Inconvenient Wedding:

Chapter Thirteen: The Undeniable Truth

Naruto glowered at the entry to Team Seven’s shared tent, determined to pounce on his sensei the moment he chose to reappear, and demand that this wedding be stopped.  The young genin had taken an instant liking to the high-spirited Frost kunoichi, but after learning of their possible blood ties, mere liking had developed into fiercer protective instincts. “Are you going to stare at that tent-flap all night?” Sasuke demanded, as he stoically endured Sakura’s first-aid.  She’d put a salve on his cut lip, a bandage wrap on his slightly skinned knee, and was currently putting a medicated gauze pad on a small scratch she’d found on his forearm. “Yes!” Naruto returned hotly. “You’ll be waiting all night, then,” Sakura warned.  “He’s going to go to that big party, like all the other adult shinobi.  We’ll be on our own tonight...minding the Daimyo...” Naruto growled in frustration.  “This stinks!  Kaka-sensei needs to know about those scrolls!  And Hinata-chan’s cousin!  Aunty-Priestess-Knockout-sama is in danger, and we can’t let her marry this skeevy guy!” “Did you just call the Lady Ice Flame...‘aunty’?” Sasuke smirked. “Yeah!” Naruto admitted, scratching the back of his head.  “Her mother’s last name was Uzumaki, wasn’t it?!  I’m entitled!” “You can’t know that she’s directly related to you by that fact alone,” Pakkun explained.  “The Uzumaki clan was scattered long ago, and their most dependable genealogy records were destroyed along with Uzushiogakure.” “There were many Uchiha who share a name, but no blood kin.  Hyuga are the same,” Sasuke explained. “I don’t care!” Naruto cut them all off.  “Priestess Knock-out is the only other Uzumaki I’ve ever seen, so I will claim her!  Even if what you say is true.”   There was a small pause for adjusted feelings before Naruto bolted from his cot, and began to put on his shoes, announcing his latest plan: “Time to crash the party!” “No you don’t, pup!” Pakkun barked, and bit onto the toe of his shoe, tugging it out of his hand.  “Kakashi-san told me to keep my eye on all of you, so you’ll be staying right here!” “What if I need to go to the bathroom...?” Naruto asked, eyes narrowed in annoyance. “Then I’ll get a leash, and take you for ‘walkies’....” Pakkun riposted. Sakura laughed.  Even Sasuke hid a chuckle behind a sudden need to cough. Naruto huffed, clearly not amused, and sullenly plopped back down onto his cot.  “Am I the only one who really cares about her around here?!?” “That’s a dumb question, even for you,” Sasuke returned.  “This entire campground cares about her!  Even this Asaito person, for the moment, at least.  Its highly unlikely that he’d do anything to harm her when he wants to marry her tomorrow.” “That’s a valid point, Sasuke,” Sakura concurred, as she moved to sit by Pakkun.  “Miriyume-sama is safe.  Perhaps safer than she’s ever been in her life.  Brides are always the most important guest at a wedding.” “Anyone who dares attack her will be torn apart,” Sasuke added.  “She is the Queen of the Moment, until...” “–Until..?” Naruto pressed. “Until she says her vow, and becomes Asaito’s wife.  Then she is beholden to his wishes.” Sakura shuddered.  Naruto scowled. “Not.  Happening!” the Uzumaki declared. “When is the ceremony supposed to start tomorrow?” Sakura asked. Sasuke shrugged his shoulders. “Then we’d better wake up really early, then, before anyone else does, and talk to Old Man Hokage, the Daimyo, Knock Out-sama’s Mom....anyone who can help us,” Naruto suggested. “Then we should all get some sleep while we can,” Sasuke continued. “What a wonderful idea,” their sensei chirped agreement, as he, quite suddenly, rushed into the tent, causing even Pakkun to jump slightly.  Kakashi was carrying a large, covered platter for some reason. “Kaka-sensei!” Naruto exclaimed, as he recovered from his fallen cot.  “Asaito and his monk are total creeps!  Believe it!  Hinata-chan said that they were sleezing up on one of her cousins!” “‘Sleezing,’ you say....?” Kakashi echoed, setting the tray on a table. “We saw scrolls that listed women from all over,” Sakura chimed in, “Like some kind of kunoichi Bingo Book!” Kakashi arched a silver eyebrow at her mention of that particular, obscure publication.  Anbu’s Most Wanted List was hardly common knowledge.... “Who told you about the Bingo Book?” Kakashi demanded.  Sasuke commandeered his attention with more interesting news: “All of Asaito’s guards are generously paid mercenaries, who are all petrified of their employer...and that monk.” “...and the monk smells of foul magic and unwholesome intent,” Pakkun added. “Sounds like the reconnaissance went well,” Kakashi congratulated.  “So, I believe that you’ve earned this....” lifting the lid from the platter, revealing three bowl of ice cream, topped with the most tantalizing candied apples that the genin had ever encountered. “What is that?!?” Naruto enjoined, already drooling. “A very special dessert from the Land of Frost called, ‘Fire on the Iceberg’,” Kakashi answered, as he blocked Pakkun from sniffing their exact contents.  “I asked the cooking-nin to make it....just for you.” The genin each took a bowl and began to eagerly eat.   Sakura squeeled in unabashed delight.  “These apples are so warm...and cinnamony!  Its like eating an autumn evening by fireplace!” “It does call autumn immediately to mind....” Sasuke agreed, trying to analyze the taste.  “It reminds me a lot of the cider my one cousin...used to make...” Pakkun huffed, and continued to glare at his contracted shinobi, feeling a bit betrayed by the snack-snubbing. “So,” the knucklehead ninja began, after drinking up the melted remnants of his bowl.  His tastebuds probably hadn’t had a chance to even register the flavor.  “How are we going to stop this stupid wedding tomorrow?” “By any means necessary,” Kakashi returned, “But only after we’ve exhausted every diplomatic method first.  Speaking of exhausted....” he allowed himself to slump against his dresser, “I am beat.  I’ll need to sleep a week straight after all of this.  But for now, I’ll have to make do with an old shinobi chakra-hack...” Kakashi made a single shadow clone, causing the original to sway unsteadily on his feet. “Kakashi-sensei!” Sakura chided, finishing her bowl of dessert and moving to his aid.  His obvious fatigue seemed to be having a sympathetic effect on her, she noticed, as she nearly stumbled in her rush to assist.  “You’re pushing yourself too hard!  You’ll run out of chakra if you keep on like this!” “Sakura’s right, sensei,” Sasuke opined, then yawned as he set down his empty bowl.  “A shadow clone will only drain you further.” “Unless the shadow clone does my sleeping for me,” Kakashi countered, as his doppleganger crawled into his cot.  “When I return, I dismiss the clone, and all its acquired rest will transfer to me.  But this is not a technique to use lightly, as there are certain....side-effects.  But desperate times call for desperate measures....” “What are the....” Naruto paused to yawn extravagantly, “...side-effects?” “Shadow clones can’t dream,” Kakashi answered, as he began to collect the bowls, and returned them to the tray. “So?” Naruto countered, as he wearily watched his teacher replace the lid over the dirty dishes.  His eyelids had suddenly become so heavy.... “So,” Pakkun picked up, after realizing that he wasn’t even going to be permitted the courtesy of licking the bowls clean, “A shinobi who cheats sleep like this too many times will go insane.  All living beings need to sleep and dream on a regular basis for a healthy mind.” Sasuke lowered his strangely heavy head in aknowledgement of the facts.  He’d seen his older brother, Itachi, employ this little-spoken of technique before.  It was like playing a game of chicken with one’s sanity.  It had probably contributed to his odd behavior...in the end.  He shuddered, as he pulled his blankets closer and reclined on his cot. “Your clone doesn’t waste time....” the Uchiha commented, over the sound of the Kakashi-clone snoring. “Unlike its creator,” lilted a gentle voice from the tent-flap.  Kurenai-sensei.  “Hiruzen-sama sent me to check in on you, Kakashi-san.”  Her crimson eyes flicked briefly over to his sleeping replica, understanding all too well the implications, then back to him.  “But if you’re in such a dire need of rest, the Hokage will understand, and forgive your absence,” turning to go. “No!” Kakashi protested, perhaps a little too forcefully.  Kurenai stopped in her tracks.  “I am going to this party...” shoving himself away from the dresser, “...and so is Pakkun.” “What?!” the dour pug reacted, pulling away from the covered platter he had become somewhat obsessed about. “I need your sharp nose, old friend,” Kakashi informed, picking him up.  “And you deserve an introduction to Miriyume-sama...” “The Lady Ice Flame?” the ninken clarified.  He’d never been one for attending large gatherings of humans.  They were always so noisy and crowded.  And the smells could get nauseating.  But seeing this Miriyume finally....face-to-face, would certainly make it worth all the ill-ease he would assuredly suffer. “Lucky dog....” Sakura complained weakly, as she slowly collapsed onto her cot.  “...Gets to....go to the...party....” Her voice tapered off like a spent wind-up doll recording, as Naruto and Sasuke unconsciously maintained their competitive natures by trying to out-snore each other. Kurenai was noticeably impressed, openly marveling at the sleeping genin. “My three are still wide awake!  How did you manage this?” Kurenai demanded. “Oh, just a sneaky, Shimogakuran childhood sleep-inducer....” Kakashi replied cryptically, as he doused the light and exited the tent. “So that’s why I didn’t get a bowl of ice-cream....” Pakkun finally factored.  “I thought you forgot about me...” “Never!” Kakashi scolded lightly, giving his best canine friend one of the dog biscuits he always seemed to have on hand.  “And there should be plenty of food at this party, too, if Shimogakurans are in charge.” “Oh, they are,” Kurenai vouched, as she led them to the party.  “Singing, dancing, gaming, and the drinks are flowing like rivers in hurricane season.” “Just like when I first met her,” Kakashi smiled at the memory. Kurenai smiled too.  This was a side of Kakashi that was rarely seen.  In fact, the last time she’d seen it was with his awkward little-boy crush on his sensei’s girlfriend, and eventual wife, Kushina. “You missed the most beautiful Father-Daughter toast,” Kurenai continued.  “The Shimokhan can be a surprisingly eloquent man when he wants to.  He even had the Hokage in tears.” “Its just as well that I wasn’t there.  I couldn’t in good conscious raise a cup in salute to this...arrangement,” Kakashi’s light mood swung to such an immediate darkness that Kurenai flinched in response. “Lord Hiruzen and I are aware of your objection to this marriage, and it didn’t require our mind-reading skills to learn of it, either,” Kurenai whispered.  “And you are not alone in your disapproval. Tonight’s dinner has convinced me that this is a bad match.  My students have also uncovered some....interesting things.” Kakashi’s tired eyes went wide, and he riveted his attention to his colleague. “So you remember what happened at dinner?” “Following some brief confusion, yes.  I managed to sort it all out.  Asaito doesn’t use genjutsu.  At least, not the type that I’m used to.  He seems to manipulate things that go deeper than thoughts.  Something closer to instincts....” “This man is exceedingly dangerous, then,” Pakkun announced.  “Like it or not, you humans are still ultimately motivated by your primal instincts, and no amount of higher intellect can completely smother them.” “Pakkun is right,” Kurenai easily ceded.  “Asaito has a frightening ability to silence the thinking mind through his ‘minor’ dojutsu, and....there’s more....” she tapered off, looking uncomfortable. Kakashi stopped in his tracks, and forced her to do the same with a hand on her shoulder.  They were midway to their destination. ��More....?” he prompted. “There is an utter....coldness to Lord Asaito.  Emotionally speaking.  Despite his outward passion and poetic words, there are no real feelings behind anything.  I’ve been around stoic types all my life, Kakashi-san,” giving him a pointed look, “....and despite your aloof manners and flippant attitudes, there is always some underlying, emotional core.  Asaito has nothing,” she shivered.  “Its utterly alien to me.  To humanity.” “So, what are you saying, exactly?” Kakashi pressed. “That this Tsuroyuni Clan seems to produce men of an exceptionally strange quality, and that the Lady Ice Flame may be in for far more that she had bargained for.  Hinata has told me something particularly disturbing.  A member of the Hyuga Clan was recently petitioned by Tsuroyuni for marriage, about five months ago.  Hiashi-sama forbade it immediately, for reasons unknown.  And don’t even get me started on that monk...” They took a moment to watch the silhouettes of the vivacious revelers projected on the drinking yurt’s walls, as they capered across the illuminated folds of rough silk, twenty feet in front of them.  The incongruence between the jubilant scene and their growing sense of dread was stark. “I like her too, Kakashi-san,” Kurenai continued, “Probably not the same way you do,” she gave him a playful nudge, “But we must remember our duty as shinobi.  Konoha’s, and the Hokage’s honor depends on this.” Kakashi emitted a bitter sounding chuckle.  “Duty....honor....  These are hardly new concepts to me.” Too late, Kurenai realized the nerve she’d struck. “Kakashi-san....I didn’t mean—“ ”Let’s go,” the stoic’s stoic cut off her apology, “Its time to pour some whiskey for the Hokage...” and led the way into the yurt. Renara was relieved to be back in the company of her husband’s clan and countrymen...and the hundred-plus who were also celebrating her daughter’s marriage.  She usually shied away from these boisterous affairs, but tonight she welcomed the drunken antics and the wild celebration.  Anything to forget about that arrogant man, and the predatory gleam in his burgundy eyes whenever he looked at Miriyume. She’d tried to talk her daughter out of this, as had Ryuumaru.  Even Matsuko had expressed reservations.  But Miriyume was adamant. Perhaps if Ryuuyuki were still here, he could have talked some sense into her... The Heron Sage-Priestess sighed, as she continued to work on the embroidery for the wedding dress.  Miriyume had always been the wilder one, even before that storm kami had adopted her.  She blamed the Yaseiarashi side. “Are you in need of a drink, Renara-sama?” Hiruzen asked over the latest atonal chorus of a Shimogakuran drinking song.   “As long as its tea, yes,” she replied.  “I drank my cup of winter whiskey for my husband’s toast, and one a day is still more than enough for my constitution.  Even thirty years of marriage to a Shimogakuran cannot change this.”  She glanced over at her husband, who was dominating the Chakra-Flow arm-wrestling tourney....as ususal.  The long string of people who had lost to him never held any grudges, though, since his generosity in victory left them all with replenished chakra. Hiruzen took a seat beside her, and poured her a cup of green tea from the pot nearby. “Ryuu-kun would never seek to change your ways,” the Hokage continued.  “He has always valued your self control and your sharp mind.  He has said that it makes up for what he generally lacks.” Renara set aside the sewing, and motioned the bartender for another cup.  She then poured her old friend some of her tea. “There are times when its so hard to be the steady voice of reason,” she admitted softly, as she directed their gaze to her daughter, who was caught up in a rather wild card game at another table.  “Like now.”  Her hand trembled with the weight of the teapot. Hiruzen’s sharp sensor abilities quickly picked up on the priestess’s unease, threatening to compromise the levee of her renowned forbearance. “She is so reckless, Hiruzen-kun, with only a pair of doting underclassmen, some fuinjutsu, and a moody, transient kami to keep her in check....” Sarutobi placed a comforting hand on her shaking shoulder.  “Renara-sama....” “...and its been working so far, but I live in dread of the day when she leaps fearlessly into the breech, and even the Sage of the Six Paths can’t reel her back in.”  She capped the confession with a forced chuckle and smile.  “Is tomorrow that day?”  Her soft voice, like the whisper of a dove, nearly broke Hiruzen’s heart.  She had lost her son.  Now, she feared the loss of the daughter.

“As long as I live and breathe, Renara-sama, you will NEVER lose your daughter,” the Hokage vowed solemnly.  “My Will of Fire has always extended to your family, and always shall.”

“And the Unity of Frost forever embraces you, my dear friend,” Renara returned, as she regained her usual regal composure.  “Speaking of unity...”

Hiruzen tracked her eyes over his shoulder, and saw his Leaf jonin. “I was beginning to think that I’d been abandoned,” Hiruzen announced sternly, “But when I remembered what charming company I’d found, I stopped caring,” flirtatiously turning back to the priestess. “Do forgive us, Hokage-sama,” Kurenai returned with a bow for Sarutobi and the Heron Sage, “...Renara-sama.  The genin were all wound-up.” “A little whiskey in warm milk does wonders at bedtime,” Renara offered, as she resumed her embroidery.  “Until they start drinking it on their own...” “I don’t even want to think about Naruto drinking whiskey right now,” Kakashi returned.  “His ramen habit is already too much,” as Kurenai took a seat beside Hiruzen. “Naruto....Uzumaki....?” the sage priestess queried.  “As in the child of Kushina Uzumaki...?” “Yes,” Kakashi returned.  “He’s my student.  You know of him?” “Kushina was my Father’s cousin,” Renara enlightened.  “We are related.” Kakashi turned a flabbergasted eye on Hiruzen.  What other bombs had this man failed to drop on him?!? “It’s a distant relation,” the Hokage defended.  “One I felt was hardly worth mentioning...” “Ugh, another useless card!” Miriyume’s voice suddenly exclaimed in obvious frustration from a large nearby table, as the rest of the card players laughed at her.  “Who shuffled this mess of a deck, dattebizu?!?” “Then again...” Hiruzen amended. “I thought we’d rid her of that word awhile back....” Renara shook her head in amused reproach.  “So childish sounding.” “What are they playing over there?” Kurenai asked, as an attentive bartender handed her a drink of whiskey. “That would be the ‘Bitter Harvest’ table,” the barman answered, handing Kakashi a cup,  “Its based on the cruelties of being a farmer in a country known for its short growing season.” “You made a game out of this?” Kakashi queried, as Pakkun sniffed the contents of the drinking dish, and quickly pulled his crinkled nose away. “A certain level of masochism has crept into our national identity, I guess you could say....” he smiled, before moving onto another group of drinkers. Kakashi set Pakkun on the stool beside Kurenai, and raised his dish in Miriyume’s direction.  “To the righteous struggle,” he toasted from afar.  “May we be ever vigilant,” then drank the vow.  Kurenai did likewise. Renara smiled in quiet sanction of the masked jonin’s obvious feelings for her daughter.  She took comfort in all the eyes that watched over Miriyume.  But this one’s spoke of a stronger conviction then most. She looked to Miriyume, who had just registered Kakashi’s presence, and saw the unmistakable spark.  The one that indicated a powerful resonance between souls.  She could easily sense their chakra natures reaching out toward each other, despite the commotion that engulfed them.  Their affinities craving union in the same manner as magnetic fields.  Just like they had at dinner.  This was why Miriyume’s spiritual core was so haywire, or rather, more haywire than usual. Of all the times to have them cross paths again, why now? Only the God Sage knew...

“Plum Harvest!” Matsuko suddenly bellowed out, as he threw down his hand of cards, sending everyone at the table into panicked action. Kunai knives were thrown at a lone shuriken at the center of the table, hanafuda cards went flying, drinks were spilt, all amidst shrieks and laughter. “The pile’s mine, Earthquake!” Gekido insisted. “What pile?” Hyozen asked, indicating the scattered cards.  “You sent it all flying again!” “This always happens with you!” another Frost kunoichi censured the Inuzuka.  “You get so intense!” “I can’t help it!” Gekido was doing a poor job of acting powerless, “I’m just freaky-fast like that!” “You got the freaky part right,” Matsuko laughed, as he refilled people’s drinks. “We’re going to make you play with chopsticks from now on...” another shinobi warned, as he gathered the scattered cards. “And he’ll still win every round,” Miriyume came to the defense of her fleet-fingered team mate, patting his striped cheek softly.  “C’mon, Gek-kun, let’s give the table a chance....” As she nudged him toward the bar counter, the boisterous crowd parted for their beloved kunoichi.  Faces lifted to offer her bright smiles.  Cups and bottles raised at her passage.  Hands moved to touch her silken kimono sleeves, and musicians sharpened their art at her approach.  It was all too easy to see the pride and affection her village had for her. So why had she taken to wandering the world, Kakashi wondered. As Miriyume passed her mother, Renara caught hold of her by the shoulder. “Come here, child,” the Heron Priestess ordered, and laid the embroidery against her back, apparently taking some tailoring measurement. “Mother, haven’t you made enough layers to mummify me with tomorrow?  I won’t be able to move in this dress...let alone marry!” “A mother’s final gift to her daughter is her wedding kimono,” Renara censured.  “You will not deny me!” Miriyume groaned in resignation, looking at the Hokage with a weary expression.  “Greetings, Hokage-sama.  Can you believe this woman?” as Renara began to adjust the ornaments in her mussed coif. “With every fiber of my being, Miri-chan,” Hiruzen answered, amused at her plight. Ice Flame shifted her blue-green eyes to Kurenai and Kakashi.  “Help me,” she pleaded weakly. Kurenai laughed before answering: “When true danger exists, I promise I’ll assist without a moment’s hesitation.  But now is not that time, right Kakashi-san–?” She turned to cue the other jonin, but found him caught up in a strange four-way stare down consisting of himself, Pakkun, Gekido, and Aoseishin.  The Inuzuka was openly scowling. “What’s the matter?” Kakashi broke the tense silence, “Is there a cap limit on ninken?” “Who the heck is this?!” Gekido demanded, leaning in closer to inspect the small forehead protector tied behind the pug’s ears. Aoseishin gave a small bark in support of the question. “My name is Pakkun,” the pug answered, sending both man and dog reeling back to a more respectable distance.  “I am Kakashi-san’s ninken.” “You–“ Gekido was in Kakashi’s face now, “–have a ninken?!  That speaks!?” Aoseishin seemed to be conducting a similar interrogation with his nose on the pug. “Is this a crime?” Kakashi chuckled, crossing his arms over his chest. “No!” the Inuzuka retorted.  “Just...unexpected!  Where was he earlier?” “Napping in the sun on Senkaori Island,” Pakkun answered in Kakashi’s stead, referring to the famed island of dogs.  “Now...who are you, exactly?” Aoseishin answered for them both with a couple of barks. “From the Northern Inuzuka, huh?” Pakkun repeated, studying Gekido’s notched fang stripes.  “I wasn’t aware that their clan had ventured that far abroad.” “I believe that they migrated in the wake of that man’s short stint at the Temple of Fire,” Hiruzen provided, indicating the Shimokhan.  “Along with a certain Sage Priestess errant,” glancing toward Renara.  “I’ve often compared him to a beacon of unyielding light with the power to draw the noblest hearts.” “Or an occasional inferno that threatens to melt the permafrost....” Renara added impishly, as she continued to fuss over Miriyume’s yukata. “So...you summon him?” Gekido was still fixated on Pakkun. “Yes,” Kakashi answered dismissively, as he watched Renara untie Miriyume’s obi. “He’s so tiny!” Gekido finally snapped and snatched up the alarmed pug, grinning like an overexcited kid.  “What are his strengths?” “Sass and insults, you ridiculous man!” Pakkun returned angrily, as he struggled against Gekido’s tight nose-to-nose hold.  “Have you no shame?!” “Not that we’ve been able to find, no,” Miriyume quipped, before grunting in obvious discomfort as her mother tightened the obi under her bustline with a sharp tug.  “Ugh....can’t....breathe....” she groaned dramatically, as she clutched at Hiruzen’s shoulder.  “I think Mother is trying to tourniquet my stomach....” The Hokage blushed at the sudden proximity of Miriyume’s impressive cleavage, now threatening to overcome its confines with every heaving breath she was dragging into her constricted lungs, and averted his eyes. “Or, more likely, Renara-sama is showing concern for her....precious daughter,” Sarutobi offered, biting his lip in self chastisement. Kurenai had to laugh at his ethical plight.  Kakashi was just agog, showing a strange lack of concern for his clearly annoyed ninken. “Unhand me already, you whiskey-steeped lout!” Pakkun barked at the besotted Inuzuka’s affections,  “Your breath is going to make me intoxicated!  Kakashi!  A little help!  Please?” Kakashi turned back toward the overly enamoured Inuzuka, and extended his hand in the manner of a parent silently demanding the relinquish of an ill-gotten toy.  Gekido capitulated with an awkward apology: “Sorry.  I got a little carried away there,” he admitted with a sheepish teheparo gesture. “I never got to see any of the smaller dog breeds up in Shimogakure....” “Understood, Gekido-san,” Kakashi forgave easily.  “Pakkun is dangerously adorable,” scratching him behind his floppy ear. “Much to my eternal sorrow,” Pakkun added, from the safety of Kakashi’s shoulder, as a fleeting wisp of scent caught his attention. Somewhere beneath the malty aroma of the abundant whiskey, and the alluring, earthy-honey smell of an amber perfume, there was a very distinct and telling fragrance on the buxom ginger in the midnight blue yukata beside the Hokage.  He figured Kakashi should know: “It would seem that Kakashi-san is not the only one who is capable of summoning jutsu,” the pug announced, looking directly at Miriyume.  “I can smell the contract you have with a denizen of the Cat Fortress, bosomy lady.” “Pakkun!” Kakashi scolded sharply, as his exposed cheek went scarlet.  Gekido collapsed against the bar in whiskey-fueled laughter. “Do you now?” Miriyume countered coyly, as her mind raced for a way to cover her ninneko’s careless tracks.  She really didn’t want to involve ‘him’ in this mess, but, this little ninken had called her out.... She reached into her brasserie, under her left breast, against her heart, to a place that she reserved for her most prized possession, and produced a cobalt summoning scroll ornamented in gold. Kakashi’s mask conveniently hid his slack jaw, and the trickle of blood from his nostrils. Miriyume held the scroll up to the pug’s nose for inspection.  “Would you like an introduction?” Within the envelope of the woman’s heady, earthy musk, Pakkun’s nose easily found the scent of ‘cat’, but not ‘that cat’.  He was still intrigued. Hiruzen chuckled, as he sipped his tea.  “Go on, Miriyume-chan.  I’d enjoy seeing the ‘noble exile’ again...” Miriyume complied by unfurling the scroll, pricking her finger with a senbon hair ornament, pressing the small wound to the scroll surface, then slapping her hand against the nearby counter top and yelling: “Cold Majesty Summoning!” Following a burst of rolling fog that provided a moment of crisp, cool air, a mighty roar caused all but Renara, Hiruzen and Miriyume to jump away from the bar.  When the mist dissipated, there stood a large, regal white tiger upon the rough-hewn oak. “A tiger-lord?!” Pakkun openly marveled from his perch on Kakashi’s shoulder. “That I am, little ninken,” the immense feline acknowledged in a deep, rumbling voice with an imperious lilt, as he reclined on the bar top, and turned his icy-blue eyes to his summoner.  “To what do I owe this summons, my lady?” “No good reason, Tosho-sama,” Miriyume smiled, as she put an arm over his burly neck, and began to massage one of his ears, which he seemed deeply appreciative of.

Pakkun was impressed.  Ninneko were elusive enough, but the Great Cat Lords were nearly impossible to track down, much less sign into a contract with. “Who is this woman who has made a contract with such a distinguished beast lord?” Pakkun quietly asked his master. “That, my impudent friend, is Miriyume,” Kakashi replied with a wink.  “...and your assignment for the rest of the night.” “Assignment?” the pug echoed. “I need to get some sleep tonight, so I’m putting you on guard duty, until morning,” Kakashi whispered, as they watched her introduce the tiger to Kurenai. “So...this is the kunoichi you found all those years ago in the Land of Frost?” Pakkun connected.  “The one that....” “She is,” the silver-haired jonin cut off, clearly pained by the memories of that day.  “It wasn’t her death that the village was mourning.  It was her brother’s.” “So why didn’t they tell us that?” “Because of their customs,” Kakashi explained.  “I’ll explain it all later, but right now, the important thing is to keep track of her at all times.  Understand?  Asaito’s already tried to corner her once.  I don’t want it happening again.” “Understood,” Pakkun returned glumly, as he watched Miriyume and the grabby Inuzuka salute each other with more of that nose-burning whiskey, drinking it as easily as ice water on a hot day.  “But...she looks like trouble.” “I know....” Kakashi murmured ardently.  “My favorite kind of trouble.”

“Rajin isn’t pleased, Persimmon-chan,” Tosho rumbled in his softest voice, using the moniker his original contract holder had labeled her with.  He was the only one she allowed to use that name. “What’s news-worthy about that?” Miriyume scoffed, as she replaced his summoning scroll in her bra. “Neither am I,” the tiger huffed.  “I made a vow, Miriyume-san, and I intend on keeping it.” “Glad to hear it, Stripes,” Miriyume returned, as she scratched the spot under his chin that his massive paw could never seem to reach, “....because tomorrow’s the big day.” “Forgive me if the fact fails to evoke the proper sense of jubilation on my part...” Prince Tosho grumbled, as he turned his glacial-hued eyes toward the approaching half-blindfolded man carrying the pygmy-sized ninken. “Your offering is appreciated, shinobi of the Hidden Leaf,” the great cat greeted, “But I don’t partake of the flesh of canines.  Moro-sama would never forgive me for eating any of her kin, no matter how....distant.” Kakashi blinked in confused shock, while Pakkun curled up tighter against his chest in horror. “That’s not why I–“ Kakashi began, before Miriyume cuffed the haughty tiger on his ear. “And that’s why I hardly ever call on you anymore!” Ice Flame scolded the 800-pound creature in the same manner she would a common house cat. “I’m sorry,” Miriyume turned back to Kakashi.  “That’s what passes for humor with this overgrown tabby!  He’s actually pretty good company, most of the time.  And an excellent shoji player...” “If only the same could be said for even a fraction of those you call friends....” the tiger continued. “Even if he is a snob!” Miriyume shot back, prompting the tiger to seek other company. “He’s harmless, I promise,” the kunoichi assured, and motioned them closer.  “But he makes me admire the straightforwardness of ninken.  Can I hold him?” referring to Pakkun. Kakashi handed him over, and watched as she placed him on her lap.  Her pale, supple fingers set to immediate work on his folded ears, turning him to instant putty in her hands. “Now, that doesn’t happen too often,” Kakashi informed, as he watched the pug roll over onto his belly with a small pang of envy.  “You must have a way with animals.” “My chakra run-off charms most living things,” she returned, as she began to massage the pug’s paw-pads, which Pakkun had always been rather stingy with.  “Its convincing them to stick around that’s the hard part.” Kakashi heard the note of lament in the casual admission. Was that what had prompted her to accept the proposal of this repugnant man?  A fear of eventual abandonment?  Despite all evidence to the contrary? Kakashi staged a silent aknowledgement of the crowd for the kunoichi holding Pakkun, before stating his case: “Is this small swarm being held against their will...?” She paused in her dog snuggling to give him a measured glare.  “It’s a documented fact that most people tire of me.  Even kidnappers.” “Well,” wedging himself between Miriyume and Aoseishin, who was sitting on the stool beside her, as Gekido sang with a group of musicians on the bar, “...I’m not going anywhere, now that I’ve finally found you again,” Kakashi assured. In that moment, Miriyume felt her swiftly crumbling guard completely slip, and her dojutsu activate.  All faded to silence as past, present and future melded abruptly into one reality, and it prominently featured this enigmatic man seated beside her.  His candid promise echoed across Time and Space itself, as she felt his perfectly complementary essence take firm anchor in her own.   The true power of the Renkingen was to explore all possibilities of various fusions, and to instantly understand the consequences.  Her intuitive eyes had just shown her that this man was everything she needed to realize perfect happiness, in both the mortal and spiritual sense. <How dare you come to me now, when circumstance forbids me to grab hold of you and demand you to stay!> she screamed inwardly, as the man beside her regarded her curiously with his lone eye.   In him alone, she saw all the pieces of the masculine soul that she had always yearned to find in a mate: her first teacher’s wisdom, her father’s strength, her team mates’ compassion, Raijin’s stoic ardor and grace, her brother’s devotion and genius, all wrapped up in one irksome masked gift pack... Her mind also told her about how ridiculously dangerous it would be to have it known that she felt this way.  Dangerous for both her quickly pending marriage, and Kakashi himself.  Asaito was a proud man, and prone to what had been once charitably described as “deranged fits of vengeful pique”.  

And in classic Yaseiarashi fashion, fear only bloomed in her heart when those she loved were at incredible risk.  The thought of him at Asaito’s non-existent mercy could put her in a perilously awkward bind.  No. Asaito’s focus had to remain on her... But that other Yaseiarashi trait....about never denying her true feelings; most importantly, love, was causing an internal war within her.  The fate of international relations was at stake here, along with her sanity.